Ok I just gotta say something here my friends found my tumblr by literally looking up a few of my interests with the word tumblr. Triangulated my location

Hats Again...

I got bored waiting for Jason to scoop me up. Like Erik before he died I collected a bunch of beanies and fedoras. They are in storage but I have my "God is everything" cap and I always wanted a hat like this in black. I immediately saw it when I walked in to donations closet.

Erik is loving that it looks like I'm starting a collection. We'll if I look good in them then fine by me. It's kind of weird realizing how just about everyone knows me. Even the new people. 😐 Makes me wonder wtf are people assuming about me. Maybe I'm paranoid. Lmao reminds me of that Garbage song.

I had forgotten how good I look in hats.

All day I've had compliments on my whole attire. Then I had a photoshoot for a brand this guy has. Some shirt and jackets. It's been a long time since I've done a photoshoot and it's hot as hell out. All in all it came out good and I made some money doing it. 🙄 He wants me to be an "embassitor"? Is that the word? Idk but he's going to use me to catalog his brand so that's cool.

I honestly don't see how good it came out. Imo I don't think I'm that "good". Funny because I did a class this afternoon about self confidence and negative thinking patterns. 🙄 I only caught the ass-end of it. 😂👌... But then I got a "homework" sheet to read and fill 😑....

Almost had a meltdown...

Like yesterday over anxiety about getting an emotional support dog. I miss Odin and I actually think I'll be here for a long time. I couldn't see my caseworker and now I have a feeling that this psychiatrist won't right the letter because she's only seen me a few times. Jason is worried I'll have a complete meltdown if she gives me a hard time. 😔 So he wants to come with. Fine, whatever.

I got my refill from the nurse of klonopin. It's a good thing I did it. Wasn't going to but then I started to have a panic. I feel better but 🤷🏼‍♀️ Maybe even better once I get to the gym. I feel so much better. Everything just kind of takes a backseat. It's poor timing and even still, I don't thing George gives a fuck therefore I find it hard to fathom what Erik is trying to beat in to me. Ugh I want to love him but I'm afraid... But like I said he's doing his thing and that's okay. I'm damaged goods anyway. 😂 Everything's totally fine 🙃... Everything is cool. Lmfao I need to get to the gym Pronto.

I can't wait for meeting up with my friends again for kareoke.

Like old times. Get drunk, philosophy, talk shit about TV shows and nerdy stuff. 😂 They are a trip. I forgot how Jon used to make this face and hand gesture whenever he heard something absurd. Im glad we still get along 😆 even happier that he thanks Jason for looking out for me. Jon is still a little protective. Erik loves hanging around when I'm with friends.

They say that, "Anyone would be lucky to have you", Judging my past (and I can't blame thier ignorance honestly) it's kind of like a backhanded compliment. Like a nice slap in the face. I'm thinking on another prank on my mom. 🤔 Something she won't expect. I think I am damaging her taste buds with the surprise spicy candy. Lmao! 😂👌

😘💞💕❤️ I love yall!

Check out my store where I offer readings starting as low as $5/per question with a response at least 1 paragraph!

Please visit: Twin Flame Medium

(ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*:・ﾟ✧Don’t forget to take a look at Erik’s blog ran by his amazing mom Dr Elisa Medhus. Lots of stuff about his afterlife and 💩 at channelingerik.com.

(◕‿◕)♡ Social: Twitter Tumblr Instagram YouTube Facebook

I'm trying to silence my mind, so even though yall didn't ask for it, I'm doing all of these any way. 1. Who was the last person you held hands with? Uhhhh, romantically it's been so long. But maybe Teague or Cody as we all drunkenly stumbled around Nashville? 2. Are you outgoing or shy? I can be both, but more outgoing. 3. Who are you looking forward to seeing? My babygirl (38 days😭) 4. Are you easy to get along with? I like to think so 5. If you were drunk would the person you like take care of you? God, I hope so 6. What kind of people are you attracted to? More feminine 7. Do you think you’ll be in a relationship two months from now? That's the plan, and I sure as fuck hope so 8. Who from the opposite gender is on your mind? Only someone of the same gender 9. Does talking about sex make you uncomfortable? Not really 10. Who was the last person you had a deep conversation with? Jennifer 11. What does the most recent text that you sent say? "I love you" 12. What are your 5 favorite songs right now? Anything from Twenty One Pilots self titled album, except Pantaloon 13. Do you like it when people play with your hair? Yes 14. Do you believe in luck and miracles? Yes 15. What good thing happened this summer? A lot, actually. I traveled with my best friends, saw my favorite band from the front row, went to Carowinds, and got a job offer. 16. Would you kiss the last person you kissed again? Fuck no. 17. Do you think there is life on other planets? Ehhhh 18. Do you still talk to your first crush? LMAO, that's a huge fucking NO, even though they still try to contact me to this day 19. Do you like bubble baths? Don't really take them 20. Do you like your neighbors? There's currently no one in the apartment next to me, so yes, I fucking love them 21. What are you bad habits? There's so many. 22. Where would you like to travel? Honestly, my only requirements are any where I've never been. But at the moment, Ohio 23. Do you have trust issues? Yep 24. Favorite part of your daily routine? Going the fuck to bed 25. What part of your body are you most uncomfortable with? The entire thing 26. What do you do when you wake up? Bitch that I woke up 27. Do you wish your skin was lighter or darker? Darker 28. Who are you most comfortable around? My Knoxville Crew 29. Have any of your ex’s told you they regret breaking up? Yes 30. Do you ever want to get married? Absolutely 31. Is your hair long enough for a pony tail? I only wear it in a pony tail, so yes 32. Which celebrities would you have a threesome with? Laura Prepon and Kristen Stewart 33. Spell your name with your chin. Qnuot - Close 34. Do you play sports? What sports? Yes, hockey. Softball, lacrosse, and basketball when I get the chance 35. Would you rather live without TV or music? TV 36. Have you ever liked someone and never told them? Yes 37. What do you say during awkward silences? Nothing 38. Describe your dream girl/guy? Someone who can love me despite how broken I am, doesn't mind watching sports with me, wants to go on adventures, and someone who I can joke around with 39. What are your favorite stores to shop in? TJ Maxx 40. What do you want to do after high school? Well that ended 5 years ago, so 41. Do you believe everyone deserves a second chance? Absolutely not 42. If your being extremely quiet what does it mean? I'm either thinking, depressed, or sick 43. Do you smile at strangers? All the time 44. Trip to outer space or bottom of the ocean? Space for sure 45. What makes you get out of bed in the morning? My job and getting to talk to my girl 46. What are you paranoid about? No one loving me 47. Have you ever been high? Yes 48. Have you ever been drunk? Lmao, yes 49. Have you done anything recently that you hope nobody finds out about? Nah 50. What was the colour of the last hoodie you wore? Navy 51. Ever wished you were someone else? All the time 52. One thing you wish you could change about yourself? I wouldn't be so broken and complicated 53. Favourite makeup brand? I despise wearing makeup 54. Favourite store? Didn't I just answer this? Lol 55. Favourite blog? All of them 56. Favourite colour? Purple, orange, or blue depending on the day 57. Favourite food? Chicken 58. Last thing you ate? Cheese pizza 59. First thing you ate this morning? Pop tart at like, 2pm 60. Ever won a competition? For what? A few 61. Been suspended/expelled? No For what? 62. Been arrested? For what? No, but close 63. Ever been in love? Yes 64. Tell us the story of your first kiss? We were watching tv with their family, everyone went to bed, they turned the lights off, grabbed my face, and we missed each others lips 65. Are you hungry right now? Kinda but I don't feel like eating anything 66. Do you like your tumblr friends more than your real friends? Nah, sorry 67. Facebook or Twitter? Facebook 68. Twitter or Tumblr? Tumblr 69. Are you watching tv right now? No 70. Names of your bestfriends? Kim, Teague, Bentley, Cody, Kelsey, Hannah, MacKenzey 71. Craving something? What? 72. What colour are your towels? Yellow or blue 73. How many pillows do you sleep with? 2 73. Do you sleep with stuffed animals? No 74. How many stuffed animals do you think you have? I haven't counted in a while 75. Favourite animal? Moose 76. What colour is your underwear? Black 77. Chocolate or Vanilla? Vanilla 78. Favourite ice cream flavour? Moose tracks or cookie dough 79. What colour shirt are you wearing? Black 80. What colour pants? Purple 81. Favourite tv show? Sportscenter 82. Favourite movie? Don't really have one 83. Mean Girls or Mean Girls 2? Original 84. Mean Girls or 21 Jump Street? Haven't seen 21 Jump Street, so 85. Favourite character from Mean Girls? Fuck if I know 86. Favourite character from Finding Nemo? Dory 87. First person you talked to today? Jennifer 88. Last person you talked to today? Jennifer 89. Name a person you hate? Does myself count? 90. Name a person you love? Also Jennifer 91. Is there anyone you want to punch in the face right now? Myself? 92. In a fight with someone? Eh 93. How many sweatpants do you have? 10 or 11 94. How many sweaters/hoodies do you have? At least 20, maybe 30? 95. Last movie you watched? Don't know - I don't really watch TV or movies 96. Favourite actress? Laura Prepon 97. Favourite actor? Robert Downey Jr 98. Do you tan a lot? Only when I'm outside - Don't do tanning beds or spray tans 99. Have any pets? Yes, my cat 100. How are you feeling? Fucking awful in so many ways 101. Do you type fast? Yes 102. Do you regret anything from your past? Yes 103. Can you spell well? Yes 104. Do you miss anyone from your past? Yes 105. Ever been to a bonfire party? Yes 106. Ever broken someone’s heart? Maybe? 107. Have you ever been on a horse? Yes. There used to be a guy who would walk one around the neighborhood and he'd let me ride it 108. What should you be doing? Sleeping 109. Is something irritating you right now? All this fucking aching 110. Have you ever liked someone so much it hurt? Lmao. Literally cried about it tonight 111. Do you have trust issues? Yep 112. Who was the last person you cried in front of? My cat 113. What was your childhood nickname? Didn't have one 114. Have you ever been out of your province/state? Yes, actually just got back 115. Do you play the Wii? I have one, but also no 116. Are you listening to music right now? No 117. Do you like chicken noodle soup? It's okay 118. Do you like Chinese food? Fuck yeah 119. Favourite book? Concussion 120. Are you afraid of the dark? Sometimes 121. Are you mean? I can be 122. Is cheating ever okay? Absolutely fucking not 123. Can you keep white shoes clean? Until drunk assholes spill something on them or step on them 124. Do you believe in love at first sight? Yes 125. Do you believe in true love? Yes 126. Are you currently bored? Yes 127. What makes you happy? 128. Would you change your name? Nah 129. What your zodiac sign? Sagittarius 130. Do you like subway? Yes 131. Your bestfriend of the opposite sex likes you, what do you do? Oh god. Been through this before. Just said "My dude, I'm gay" 132. Who’s the last person you had a deep conversation with? Jennifer 133. Favourite lyrics right now? "I don't mind at all, I lean on my pride, lean on my pride, I'm a lion" 134. Can you count to one million? I mean, I could, but I'm not going to 135. Dumbest lie you ever told? "I'm fine" 136. Do you sleep with your doors open or closed? Open for my cat 137. How tall are you? 5' 7" 138. Curly or Straight hair? Curly 139. Brunette or Blonde? Brown? 140. Summer or Winter? Summer 141. Night or Day? Night 142. Favourite month? December 143. Are you a vegetarian? No, I don't like veggies 144. Dark, milk or white chocolate? Milk 145. Tea or Coffee? Iced coffee 146. Was today a good day? I guess 147. Mars or Snickers? Snickers 148. What’s your favourite quote? Don't thinkI have one 149. Do you believe in ghosts? Eh 150. Get the closest book next to you, open it to page 42, what’s the first line on that page. I'm not getting out of bed

Me.trocon 2017 Saturday

diary for future me, read if you want but it’s rly only 4 myself tbh. Cosplayed: mik.an Tsumiki

OKAY so the morning was rly bad and hectic and i dont like remembering it but i woke up and got ready bc the lol.ita fashion show was at 10 am and dad n i left and dad stopped by burger king to get himself some food but my cramps flared up BADLY and i had a midol in my bag so i took it out but im afraid of pills and cant swallow them so i was shaking and then i started crying and the drive-thru girl was like “oh gosh are you okay?” and i explained what was going on but rushed and sloppily and she was like ��oh this happens to my lil sis too.. it’s okay sweetie just relax” or soething and i had dad park the car in the parking lot of burger king and for me to put my midol in a BK crospy crown and take a huge bite and swallow but that backfred and i chewed some of the pill and it was Blegh but the midol didnt kick in right away and the cramps were still v bad so i had dad rive me home so i could lie down for a while and i asked mom to use the heater bc she accidentally woke up so i asked her while she was awake and she kept saying no bc she liked it but when i begged she let me use her bed and used mine and it barely helped but overtime i gradually geew okay and hadd to calm myself so the stress wouldnt make my cramps return and i left at like 11 am and i missed the BB panel too but it’s Okay and i walked in and met up w haji near the ticket place and thankfully her mom let us wander around the con

so we went to the GF panel but i was mainly distracted by a small octopus plushie on some guy’s head and haji n i kept joking abt us knocking it off his head and abt the guy playing space jam and bassboosted music outside the panel room and it being audible whenever someone opened the door to leave or come in pff... but the dipper did the lamby dance and it was cute aa and the dipper offered ppl in the audience scooby snacks to any of the audience so haji n i had one n it was rly good aa i hadnt had one of those in years theyre Yummy...

Anyway, after that, i tried to go to the DR meetup, but it was rly rly tiny?? like we held it inside w like 2 handfuls of ppl and we tried to get the junkos to step on the tsumikis (there were 3 of us, including me) w 2 junkos bc i requested it but the junkos didnt wanna accidentally pantyshot the camera so we got up from our kneeling positions haha and haji went to the dealers room for a while while this was going on and i tried to help the mikan when she said she got a cut on her face but she said it was alright and eventualy haji came back and i left w her and we decided not to go to the m.lp panel that i kind of wanted to go to and instead went to the dealers room and looked around and i showed her the idol merch table and haji said she’d buy me anything bc she didnt get to give me a birthday present earlier on in the year so i looked around for a Big hamster plushie or something but those seemed expensive so we came back to the idol table and got me the tori keychain i’d been wanting since yesterday or thirsday and haji got a tsukasa and then we ran into the ppl running the fine panel and we all joked abt “ALL WOMEN ARE QUEENS, EICHI!!” 

and we walked around for a bit more before going to the rw.by panel but we could barely hear and we had to sit at the back of the room due to lack of seats so haji and i just whispered to eachother the whole time and i had haji read part of an en.stars smut fic w impregnation kink (just kink not actual mpreg) and a lil stupid thing i wrote abt rei and koga and then we watched the service dog near us near the other corner and watched it lick the carpet and Rest and enjoyed watchin it then we tried to walk around and someone asked for a pic of me but i was like “UHH WHERES MY SYRINGE PROP” so haji thought i elft it on the floor of the other panel and she left to go find it while i waited near these ppl bc they were just hanging out anyway and i kept worrying like “shes been gone for a while.. is she okay this shouldve been quick oh god” and my cramps started returning a lil but i tried to keep myself calm and the uraraka was like “are you okay i can go try n retkrkieve her if she got lost” and i was like “it’s okay” and eventually i checked deep in my bag and found it and i tried to call haji but she arrived just as i called her and i was like “i found it im sorry aa” and then we Ran to the en.stars panel

AND THE EN.STARS PANEL WAS SO SO MUCH FUN!! I have the first half recorded on video and since it’s rly late rn, i wont type too much abt that, but i asked eichi if he was anyone’s sugar daddy and, if not, would he be mine and he said he was kind of one to hajime and bought him lots of things and haji asked who was the most into minions and it was apparently Tori and i showed them the scooby doo au i made w some of haji’s assistance and showed wtaru (and the others) the Scoobkai Doonata that i drew and they all were laughing and i wa glad aa and the topic of vore came up again and i showed them shino’s ku.rochia vore post and the kiryu was like “OH MY GOD CAN I GIV U MY TWITTER SO I CAN BE SENT THAT” and the panelists were laughing and tori read the tweet aloud while laughing and i told them the ensemble vore account and eichi was like “well, theyve prob gained more followers today” and i asked if anyone in the audience wanted to see it and omeone rasied their hand so i showed them and they were laughing too and it was Wild.wataru apparently named his doves after fine members and tomoya, and i asked kiryu if he could lift rabits + fine and they nodded and i later asked if he knew that he’s a thicc bara and the fandom thirsts for him and he laughed and nodded. Haji asked them if they’d heard rainbow circus nightcore bassboosted and the eichi said they played it at practice ssometimes (i thick this was ooc not in-character answer) and someone in the audience actually KNEW the person who made that and messaged them and they messaged them that tori said they liked them and the rainbow cisurcus stuff and the person replied w “ Why” and honestly this whole panel was FUN but so someone told us where the en.stars buttons were so the fine group, their friend the kiryu, haji, and i all went to the booth and got buttons and i said goodbye to eeryone and walked around for a minute then haji n i went into the vol.tron talk panel and haji had to leave aww and after that the vol.tron panel was mostly shitty fanfic reading, swearing, and roasts and i wanted to go to vol.tronival but for reason i thought thatd be rude bc the panelists were like “we have to compete w... THAT” and so i stayed and went on my ipad most of the time.

I went to the per.sona 5 q and a and it was so full that i had to stand in the back but they sometimes kept bringing up per.sona 4 and perso.na 3 so i was confused and they said they were abt to start trivia and it might have spoilers so i took that opportunity to leave bc i dont want spoilers and it was kind of boring so i walked around the dealers room and i found a Rock and Uno and i talked to them and turns out the Rock was actually the mondo from the day before bc they said “hey, sweetie!” in a nice tone and i was confused and they were like “ah im the mondo btw!” so we talked and i talked abt how i watched both seasons of nan.baka in like.. 2 days and i was like “uno’s best boy-” and rock (as a joke) went deadpan and walked away and i was like “ROCK IS ALSO A GOOD BOY JUST.. UNO...” and rock came back and i said that uno and nico stole my heart and uno fistbumped me and rock was like “you should cosplay w us sometime~!” and i said i was considering doing uno but couldnt and i cant do most of the characters bc long sleeves and rock said i’d be cute as the chinese qi kid and i was like “i cant paint myself either but thank you!” and they had to leave but i got rock’s tumblr and they called me cute or sweet and i looked around the dealers room for a second more before scurrying to the LL panel and apparently the thing was 2 hours??

but anyway it was p funny and we all just messed around and did q and a and games like handshake  killer and karaoke! i sang half of Sentimental Liars but my voice wasnt as loud as i wouldve liked it and kind of shaky bc i was cold and Nervous and the nico from the panel and another random guy clapped for me and the 2 en.stars fans in front of me said my voice sounded nice and at some point i overheard those 2 talking abt making a screamo cover of melody in the dark and i was like “omfg are yall gonna actually make a cover. go fully hardcore” and Dead girl walking and candy store got sung and it was a Fun panel. the kiryu from earlierwalked in too so when everyone was talkign to eachother near the end of the panel, i asked shino if they wanted to say anything to the kuro and shino asked them how ranking went and the kiryu said they couldnt rank and shino was just so happy and keysmashing and asked f i could say “pls lift me mr.bara” and the kiryu chuckled and the kiryu was like “do they want me to like.. do anyfin?” so i asked shino and all he said was “DAB” so i took a pic of the kiryu dabbing and shino said they hadnt been feeling well so it cheered them up so i told the kiryu that and they said to tell shino that that made them happy and when the kiryu and i swapped tumblr apparently they already follow me and im like “FGNEGN DUDE.. I KNO U IVE SEEN U IN MY FOLLOWERS LIST IM YUMENOSAKIACADEMY ROX...” n they were like “oH” and they showed me a funny post abt shu and i proposed a tri.ch shu hc and then they ahd to leave but i stayed for the vol.tron panel but i was messaging shino thru most of it but i saw lynds (as lance) get hugged by the panel’s lance and i read some en.stars doujins and messaged another friend too so i wasnt paying much attention, then istill stayed in the room for the rw.by panel, but same i was just on my ipad but i saw some of the dares and the jaune sang and stuff and evemtually it was over and i walked around taking pics before going outside to wait for dad to pick me up 

and i took a pic of a pidge, lance, and keith and gav em lollipops and the pidge was like “omg ur nails.. wait, did u go to a hai.kyuu panel last year?” and i was like “ah, no i was casu.al d v a” and they were like “yea, but u went TO  a hai.kyuu panel, yea?” and i said yea and they were like “aa i was the hinata u talked to. i recognized u bc the nails” and i laughed bc thats my only noticable feature, huh. pff