#I just wanted a meeeeeeme
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THE UNFORTUNATE DETAILS IN HOW DEEDS RUNS THIS BLOG
about speed
fluctuates from day to day. i’m not so much a busy person as i am a chronically exhausted one. i do try to keep people updated on when i’m not going to be around or when i don’t plan on sitting down and putting my fingers to keys. this can also be dictated by where my brain is at the time. i may be lightning with one muse and a snail with another. it rarely has to do with my partners and more to do with brainrot and my unwillingness to force out content. but sometimes a scrub just.. needs a break, too.
regarding replies
on a good day when i’m feeling my oats for all the characters on my roster(s), they come out in order and i’m just ocd enough to match word/letter counts to keep my sanity stable. one a bad day though ? i’ll hyperfixate on one or two muses and the rest could take weeks+ to be got to. again, this isn’t a matter or me not liking the storyline or my partner, i just know how i am and if i want to write something i will. if i don’t ? i know it’s not going anywhere and so long as my partners are okay with me jumping around ? we’ll be hunky dory. xo
hot take on starters
woof. okay, so here’s the pickle with starters of late, for me at least ; i get pretty burnt out when i write them, they get a like, and then there’s never any activity on it again. it makes me feel like there’s some what’s the point tension in there and i do get kind of irritated after that with the partners who do it. i don’t always write for my own amusement. that said, i can whip out a starter at the drop of a hat. i don’t always need a subject and i can usually wing it enough to make sense, timelines be damned. but for me to hunker down and get to that ? i like to know the person/people i’m writing them for will, y’know, make something of it. this has grown into a nasty trend and it’s draining. i can feel myself slipping. sos.
the inbox
meeeeeemes. memes. i love me a good meme or two. or three. this takes a step more effort than liking a starter call, y’know ? it shows a bit more interest in writing with me and i’m more inclined to crank something out for them. i’m also all about combining memes. whether they’re from the same prompt list or i’m frankensteining together a real metal setup to hit homers with. they’re good icebreakers. another note, i keep my anonymous off at all times because we cause drama like men here, faces out. if you ever want to ask me something privately, my ims are on and open. ...also i sometimes close my inbox because i’m a fool who gets overwhelmed. also y’all are cute.
selectivity
high. it’s nothing personal, i just know me and i know i don’t have the social battery to really keep up with a high tally of folks. i’m not concerned with aesthetics, though i like to pretend mine is noice. i don’t care about icons or if you format your replies. i like a partner who puts their all into their writing above all else. someone i can tell, by looking, is committed to their muse(s) and will be around for the long haul if we plot something out. because i’m so picky though, i do a good deal of softblocking and the occasional hardblock if someone keeps following me back with no payout. i’ve been neck deep in this hobby for a very long time and i don’t have the same patience i used to.
a wishlist
everything. the end. seriously though, i know there’s a wishlist tag somewhere on my blog. it’s usually for shippy stuff though. of which i’m always down to clown with. usually i’m pretty upfront with what i want from a connection though. if i have an idea, i’ll seek out the mun/muse i think it’ll work with best and float it by them. we’re here for instant gratification.
one final honest note
i am not good at maintaining conversation out of character. i will, at some point, go quiet and, if you want to give me a poke, please do. this rarely ever translates to my eagerness or willingness to write with a person though. as said before, the social battery is low and after a while, for the sake of unwinding, i’ll clam up. i also just ??? rather focus myself on getting replies and the like done when i’m typing ? chitchat sometimes can feel monotonous and i see it as a distraction. now, plotting ? if something is real ripe and juicy, i probably won’t shut up and then i’m sorry for that, too. :l
i stole this from @pagetorn and now i’m making it all y’all’s homework for today. this is a really nice way to let people know i’m never getting better and it’s all downhill from here. :)))
#ooc. i am the end of everything.#deeds deetz.#( yo srsly i'm... not good at talking to folks??#i try though#but i'd really rather just write )
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Anyway, I’m probably going to start rewatching Buffy again and poke at AtS. Unlikely that I will watch past the third season of AtS because fuck season 4 and season 5 was a goddamned clusterfuck. Also. Not a fan of Cordy becoming a higher being because it’s fucking weird okay. I don’t even like the whole powers that be nonsense that cropped up in the Buffyverse because idek. It has that nebulous god with a capital G vibe because blah blah blah balance, and it irks me because it’s so fucking uncreative. Like, look, okay, you’ve built a world where demons, magic, ghosts, vampires, etc. ad naseum are real and when you decide you want to name a higher power, you not only give it a stupid name, but it’s just like. You know. Some vague sense of moral goodness that makes me tired.
Ofc, I’m vaguely obsessed by the very secular approach to the...inescapable trappings of Christianity that come with demons and vampires if you’re not willing to tell us why it might not have to do with Christian dogma, it’s gonna be there in the background for a lot of people. Giles has said things that implies he’s not...Christian at the very least and in the past he was a practicing occultist. Vampires are repulsed by crosses, and yet few of the wielders would be considered faithful. Willow is Jewish ffs. So obviously faith doesn’t have to do with it. Is it the concept of basic belief? ie: Cross burn vampire rather than God protects from evil? Wow, this is turning into a hell of a wool gather. Anyway, I’m going to eat something and fuss around. I’m feeling very motivated. I might even throw up a meeeeeeme or starter call.
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for the character meeeeeeme uhhhhh colress, emmet, rex, scratch?
colress!
What I like about them: science boy!
What I dislike about them: his anime portrayal
Favourite moment: yeeting ghetsis
Least favourite moment: getting my ass kicked by him postgame b2w2
A situation with this character that I want to see explored more: how does he work outside plasma...
An interesting AU for this character: no plasm... also. rainbow rocket colress from a timeline where neo plasma wins
A crossover: uuuhhhhh. fuck it. digimon
OTP (or OT3+ etc…. just… favourite ship): nothing at the moment!
Other ships?: shrug!
BROTP: him and n
NOTP: ghetsis.
An assortment of headcanons!: he’s autistic babeyyy
emmet!
What I like about them: he’s a good soft friend
What I dislike about them: man idk!!
Favourite moment: him getting so smiley when told about the prophecy, also how cute his lil smile is swhen he hugs lucy in undar
Least favourite moment: his treatment in tlm2
A situation with this character that I want to see explored more: the transitional stages between bricksberg and apocalypseberg
An interesting AU for this character: what would happen if emmet did get stuck in undar because of rex, but like, no ourmamageddon
A crossover: pogeyman...
OTP (or OT3+ etc…. just… favourite ship): him and gcbc and benny!
Other ships?: various combos of the three
BROTP: him and the squaad
NOTP: him and rex, him and business, him and watevra, basically no cest ships
An assortment of headcanons!: Business is his dad, and he’s trans and autistic!
rex!
What I like about them: he’s cooooool guuuuuuy
What I dislike about them: his fate
Favourite moment: the rexcelsior tour
Least favourite moment: HIS FATE
A situation with this character that I want to see explored more: HIM NOT VANISHING?
An interesting AU for this character: AU WHERE HE DOESN’T
A crossover: pogeymaaaaan
OTP (or OT3+ etc…. just… favourite ship): rex x undar gcbc x undar benny...
Other ships?: combinations of the three, also dangerstyle
BROTP: him and his lucy
NOTP: same as emmet
An assortment of headcanons!: trans autistic boyyyeeeee
scratch!
What I like about them: oh yknow
What I dislike about them: you can’t just kill people motherfucker
Favourite moment: h Y’know
Least favourite moment: don’t just sic a bunch of big guys on me asshole
A situation with this character that I want to see explored more: i dunno!
An interesting AU for this character: my au babeyy
A crossover: p . p ogeyman
OTP (or OT3+ etc…. just… favourite ship): gru and my rarepair,
Other ships?: nah
BROTP: dunno
NOTP: him x alan
An assortment of headcanons!: i have a lot im tired
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💛💝💟 for the writer ask meeeeeeme
ALRIGHTY let’s see here...
What is the title based on?
So there was a particular day I was walking around on a break at work thinking about the book I wanted to write, branching off of a stem of an idea...and everything was coming together on that day, coalescing into a real thing. It was a grey autumn day, overcast you might say. It was the vibe of the IRL world the moment this story became what it is now, it is a vibe that occurs many times within the book itself, and honestly “over-cast” is kinda what ends up happening...
Who has your favorite character arc?
Gosh, well geez...that’s a tough one. But I think that has to go to Mal, tragic as hers is. Lysandra’s development over the story is good too, but Mal’s slip into awfulness happens because she loses one of her most important friends. The other three foil her in such complementary ways, and it’s one slip into another, too much time spent alone, no one to keep her from trekking into the places she can fall, only the people who would fall with her or help pick up the pieces once she does. I like to say Lys would be such a good witch if the magic wasn’t evil...Mal’s heart was in the right place, too.
You can’t win.
How is your style different in this work compared to previous ones? has it more shifted for the story or just developed in general?
I was in the process of hashing out my narrative voice as I began writing this, and I like to think that it has solidified through writing this one. This story, fantastical as it might be, incorporates a great deal more realism than I am used to. Magic notwithstanding, these characters live otherwise pretty normal lives, and I like that. I’d say if anything, something that came out in my writing style in this book has been a lot of the dialogue-heavy “acting” scenes, ones that play out pretty cinematically in my head. I’ve been enjoying trying to capture that kind of a feel.
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Oh man, DVD commentary meeeeeeme. I was just telling you about how much I adore Keep it Kind, so how about "Enjolras puts it on" and "“Don’t thank people for loving you. And keep warm.”"?
The opening scene of this fic remains one of my favorite things I have ever written, so here goes! (Under a cut, because of potential Wall Of Text issues.)
Enjolras puts it on. There isn’t much else he can do, and it’s all the thanks he can muster right now. It’s warm and soft, and he sighs his relief when it’s on. “You aren’t going to ask me if I’m okay?”
Enjolras is trying really hard to sound bitter here, even if the narration doesn’t say it, but it definitely comes out really sad.
“You aren’t. Believe me, I know the signs.” Grantaire sighs, and his breath mists in the air like cigarette smoke. “They love you in there.”
“And out here?”
“You know that’s not a fair question.”
I have a lot of feelings about Enjolras, as you know, and especially a lot of feelings about him being observant, especially where his friends are concerned. He knows R has feelings for him, and R knows he knows, and honestly until this week it’s a miserable and uncomfortable situation for both of them.
Enjolras wants to hear him say it, without the usual tone of mockery that everyone knows is a lie masking the truth. He doesn’t reciprocate, but it can’t be so selfish just to want to hear the words. Instead, he offers honesty of his own. “It’s exhausting. I’m just as human as the rest of you, and they remember that when I need to eat and sleep, but not always at other times.” (Am I calling out some occasional fandom tendencies here? Mayyyybe.) He frowns. “You’re the worst of them. I don’t know why you didn’t join in.”
“I call you Superman or Apollo or what-the-fuck-ever because I know you aren’t. (Modern AU Grantaire definitely dips into pop culture for the Apollo parallel, you cannot convince me otherwise.) Look, they’re all going to apologize. Your phone is going to start ringing in about a minute and a half, and they’ll say sorry and mean it, and maybe you should explain it to them? We aren’t mind-readers.”
"Maybe I should. But I’ll do it on my way home." (Enjolras is done done done. This night may have triggered the changes, but he’s been getting fed up with this kind of teasing for a while now.) He shoves his hands in his pockets. "You’re welcome to come with me."
Grantaire raises his eyebrows. “Smoking, walking out of gatherings, taking up with scoundrels? Whatever would your mother say?”
“That’s a no?” (Enjolras only realizes that he wants to fuck R when R implies it, and he is kind of shaken by it.)
“Contrary to popular belief, I have some instinct for self-preservation.” (MODERN AU GRANTAIRE GOES TO THERAPY THE END.) He stands up, and Enjolras stands to join him, to be on the same level. Grantaire sighs, facing him, and then he’s taking Enjolras’s face in his gloved hands. The wool is a little scratchy, but his face is wonderfully warm, and he doesn’t twitch away though he knows what Grantaire will do next: press a soft, cold kiss to his lips, mingling breath until he pulls away. “We all love you,” he says, just as soft, just as devastating as the kiss, and then he’s stepped away. There’s snow in his hair, because he gave Enjolras his hat.
Poor R, here. He kind of knows what Enjolras needs and is trying to give it to him, show that he may idealize Enjolras but doesn’t make him into some kind of marble ideal either, show that he loves him as a person and not an ideal, but he’s also doing it at a cost of a lot of his imagined scraps of dignity and a not-insignificant amount of his mental health for the night, especially since he’s not going to talk to JMB about this interlude when Enjolras needs space.
He’s much colder, with Grantaire’s hands away from his face, with Grantaire’s body not next to his anymore. And maybe Grantaire was smart not to come home with him, because Enjolras may not love him, but he thinks they would have had sex tonight, and he’s not sure how either of them would recover after that. “Thank you,” he says. He’s not sure what he means.
There is, somewhere deep in my brain, an angsty AU of this fic where they do go home together tonight and fuck, and where it makes things awkward and Grantaire can’t help Enjolras through this week as well as in the main version of the fic.
Grantaire, it seems, is, because he just smiles and shakes his head. “Don’t thank people for loving you. And keep warm.”
I really love “Don’t thank people for loving you” even if I am not quite sure why. Maybe it’s because I can imagine Grantaire’s tone very easily when he says it.
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Thank you for loving Yamcha and making him happy! You have no idea how happy this makes me in turn! I don't know how many drafts of this ask I had to rewrite because the first batch were all, essentially, screaming and cry-typing, seriously, thank you!
D’AAAAWWW 😭💙💙💙JFKTJFU NOTHING WRONG WITH CRY TYPING CUZ IM DOING IT RIGHT NOW JFHJFVFHFGJD
I’m just really REALLY unashamed about my yamcha enthusiasm 👌🏽👌🏽
sUrE sOme days im embarrassed over some forms of content since i still think most of whatever i come up with is pretty dumb, but the basic Yamcha enthusiasm is just relentless since i block out everything else lmao
Seems like a better use of time to MAKE what i want to see rather than jump on the complain-train about petty shit like “HNNNNGH THE SERIES NEVER GIVES HIM ANYTHING HNNNNNN LOOK AT THIS JOKE THEY MADE HNNNNGGGGHHH GUUUUUUU NO MORE MEEEEEEME HRRRRRRRRRRR…!!!!”
(Which i see way more than of actual content. Sometimes i feel like folk are just purposely focusing on that stuff lmao So mad about that? Then DO something ffs, or find some positives man) OKAY, TANGENT- BUT NONETHELESS
YAY💙💙💙
#cozy ask#anonymous#real talk that stuff actually does piss me off#if ur gonna complain at least complain WHILE doing something#sure that stuff is relentless but you’d be surprised how much it feels like it never happens of you stay in the right places#i typed that whining like cool cat
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