OH! MAD HATTER'S MAD HEART! THE TRANSACTIONS AS FAIR AS FAIR CAN BE!

TMNT S02E03 - It Came From Beneath The Sewers

Which is not technically true, since what we see comes from the sewers, and not really any lower down. But “beneath” sounds so much more sinister, doesn’t it?

So the Turtles are back to searching for the next part of the Eye of Sarnath, and presumably hoping that this one doesn’t have horrifying near-fatal effects on them.

What kind of front seat holds five people?!

Donatello’s tracker makes R2-D2 noises at him, which apparently means something. They head off to a relatively deserted area... which has a carnival in it. I guess it had to fall somewhere, so why not a carnival?

April is horrified that they plan to just stroll in, reminding them that they’re turtles and thus likely to attract attention. But they seem pretty relaxed about the idea, pointing out that they can just claim to be part of the sideshow or something like that.

“Is there a carnival dress code?” Well, not being practically nude is probably expected.

I have to wonder, whose idea were the monogrammed belts? Did Splinter have trouble telling them apart, or is it just the easiest way to keep their stuff from getting mixed up?

Meanwhile, Krang has finally gotten sick of his answering machine being filled up with whiny demands, and agrees to help Shredder find the next fragment of the crystal. Also, Baxter threw the first one away, somehow. I’d suggest he did it passive-aggressively, but someone who addresses Shredder as “master” all the time probably doesn’t have enough spine.

And despite never having seen the crystalline tracker or the Eye of Sarnath, Krang is able to zero in on the energy... in the Caribbean.

“I’ve located it, in an area outside the city!” Outside “the city.” Gotta love that even the alien brain-creature has that New Yorker state of mind, where there’s just New York and then the Mad Max wasteland outside it. Apparently Shredder already knows that that’s where a carnival is located, which raises the question of whether he had been there before.

So the Turtles and April sort of wander around, with Michelangelo winning prizes and Donatello getting fleas. But the crystal is found first by two small boys who hope they can trade it for more ride tickets. The Turtles are a bit offput by the idea of mugging small children, but they’re dragged off by the carnival boss who mistakes them for clowns. No, I’m not sure why.

April tries to bribe the kids, but they won’t pony up for only three bucks and/or a credit card. Does she think they have a card reader?

If you need proof that Shredder’s really come down in the world, the mighty and deadly ninja is about to mug two small children.

So after the Turtles are railroaded into doing a clown act (yes, really), 

April milks Michelangelo of all the cash he has apparently been keeping in his invisible pockets. But she’s too late, because Shredder has managed to grab the crystal, get kicked in the shin by one of the kids, and sent the thing flying only for it to be grabbed by Baxter.

“You must admit, I do have soft hands.” Did anyone dispute that?

But things get icky when they head back to their hideout to analyze the crystal, and it bumps into Shredder’s foot, which has some kind of slime on it. The slime is apparently some kind of Dimension X plant matter that Shredder stepped in when.... he was inside the Technodrome. And he decides that a giant plant will obviously be a great way to kill the Turtles, because... uh... Little Shop of Horrors.

The Turtles are kind of upset that they bumbled the whole getting-fragments thing twice in a row, especially since the batteries are running out in the crystal tracking device.

If you need proof Donatello’s a nerd, look how deliriously happy he is at the sight of alien batteries.

Just then giant green vine-tentacles come breaking through the wall, and immediately grabs Michelangelo, who seems to be the natural target for tentacles in this series.

As if it weren’t weird enough, the plant says “ow” when cut, before grabbing April and Raphael, and finally withdrawing after too many nasty jabs. Donatello figures out that it’s not from this planet... which is a bit of a Captain Obvious, since last time I checked killer vine-tentacle plants don’t exist here.

Also, where did Splinter go?

April, having nearly been dragged off by a killer plant, whines because they’re leaving her behind. Maybe they want to keep their rescuing to a minimum? So she ends up in her apartment with her friend Irma, who is thinking of (what else?) men. Wait, apartment? She must have gotten another one incredibly fast; this is only the third episode of season 2, and season 1 featured her apartment being devoured by Mousers. 

Anyway, it’s a note supposedly by the Turtles, with an address on it. A smarter person would wonder why they didn’t just call her, like they said they would, or would verify that they left a note. April just charges out the door without wondering if this might be a trap.

Spoiler: it’s a trap, and Baxter and Shredder are waiting there for her. So Shredder calls the Turtles to notify them that he’s kidnapped her, because apparently the incredibly fast-growing and dangerous alien plant isn’t filling the entire sewer system fast enough.

“That’s April all right. I recognize her mumbles.” This is only the eighth episode, and already they’re used to her being in peril.

Since Michelangelo has a one-track mind, he’s hungry when they get there, much to the disgust of the others. 

But that gives them the idea to disguise themselves as pizza delivery boys, because apparently they have those costumes AND pizzas just rattling around in their van.

“It’s four green pizza delivery boys.”

“I don’t remember ordering any pizzas, especially green ones.”

Gotta love confusing grammar. 

Also, does that mean that people CAN see that they’re green when they’re in disguise, and they just don’t assume there’s anything weird about that unless they specifically know that they’re turtles?

So the Turtles burst in and start assaulting Baxter and Shredder with weapons and pizzas, and of course free April. In about five seconds, the bad guys flee the scene.

So... what was the point exactly of this little cul-de-sac? Capturing April didn’t actually serve any purpose beyond producing another fight scene and filling up a few more minutes. And it will never really be referenced again. Did the episode run a little short, and they put this in to fill it out?

Anyway, the TV happens to be on and they see the monster plant sprouting from the street and causing mayhem.

The plant is apparently big and strong enough to wave around multiple cars at the same time, which means it requires FRICKIN LASER BEAMS just to drive down the street.

But it’s nearing time for the boss battle to ensue, which means that the Turtles using FRICKIN LASER BEAMS attracts the attention of the main plant. Which kinda looks like a multi-eyed hand puppet.

It also starts eating their car, which raises interesting questions about what its roots are feeding off of, since plants generally get nutrients that way. They attack it, but get an embarrassing smackdown before the thing retreats back underground.

They just sort of abandon their van in the alley, and jump down to ask Splinter what they should do. Splinter’s advice is the same kind of wisdom that anybody who’s ever weeded can give you: tackle the root of the problem, very literally. Fortunately the plant is.... bleeding, so they can track it that way.

And it leads to... a solid brick wall.

Um, does that mean the plant broke through, went through the wall, and then replaced all the bricks exactly as they were before? Because otherwise I’m not sure how the trail can lead there.

But it’s all irrelevant anyway because it bursts through again.

It drags off Donatello, which means that it’s time for the others to break out their secret weapon:  drag!

Not kidding. They actually put Michelangelo in a lady plant getup, which he hates of course. Today they’d be taking so many pictures so they could always remember this delightful occasion.

And the plant drops Donatello because it’s.... um... I think it’s meant to be horny. Which isn’t really how plants work; they just sort of have pollen and male-female parts, which insects and wind handle for them. Of course, this IS from an alien world, and technically all it needs to do to count as a plant is to photosynthesize, so... I guess the idea of a horny plant isn’t technically impossible, just very unlikely.

Yeah, my expression mirrors Raphael’s.

The other three tease Michelangelo for the remaining three seconds that he can stand being groped by a horny plant that is making kissy lips at him. Then he busts out the nunchucks and starts beating the plant with them.

Leonardo then brainstorms Splinter’s advice in a veeeeery literal way by stabbing the plant in its... stem. It’s meant to be the root, but roots tend to be underground. And despite being so huge, the plant fortunately is VERY sensitive and immediately shrivels down to a green slop.

So that evening, still not having the fragment, the Turtles celebrate with an all-meat pizza, and April brings them a venus flytrap apparently out of sadistic amusement.

VERDICT

Not bad at all. Not perfect, but it’s a big stronger than the last episode in that none of the characters had massive brain farts for no adequately explained reason... well, except maybe Baxter, but I remain unconvinced that he didn’t do that on purpose.

Anyway, it starts off a bit slow’n’silly with the whole carnival focus, and the kids who talk a lot and appear a lot for about two scenes before vanishing completely. It really kicks into gear when the whole giant plant story starts moving, especially since it provides some interesting insights into how the Eye of Sarnath is supposed to work. But I guess it was too short to actually fill out the episode, hence the April-gets-captured plot cul-de-sac.

And it has a monster-movie focus to match the monster-movie title, even with one scene of Michelangelo exclaiming that he saw this in a movie once (which wouldn’t surprise me, given that there are actually a lot of sci-fi references in this series). It’s not complicated, focusing instead on just being pretty entertaining with the straightforward story it has.

It is interesting, though, that the Turtles consistently fail at getting the fragments despite having a tracking device that exists to do nothing else. It’s also interesting that Shredder doesn’t try to use this latest fragment more than once, since presumably the crystal fragment would also create killer plant monsters with Earth plants. Giant killer rafflesias? 

GRADE: B

Album of the Year 2017 #03: BROCKHAMPTON - SATURATION

Album of the Year 2017 #03: BROCKHAMPTON - SATURATION

Artist: BROCKHAMPTON

Album: SATURATION

Listen:

Youtube

Apple Music/iTunes

Google Play Music

Tidal

Napster

Spotify

Album Background:

BROCKHAMPTON formed in 2015, largely as a rebirth of a group known as ASF (AliveSinceForever). Over the course of the next two years, they dropped a few singles, eventually releasing a mixtape by the name of “ALL AMERICAN TRASH” in the summer of 2016. That winter, frontman of the group Kevin Abstract released his sophomore album “American Boyfriend”, touring for the album and earning a following and notoriety for the larger group. Then, in the spring of 2017, the group returned with the first single from SATURATION, “FACE”. In the space of around a month, they reportedly created around 40 songs for their sophomore mixtape, which evolved into their debut album. Of those 40 songs, 14 made the cut, in addition to 3 skits, creating a 17 track album. With each single leading up to the album, they steadily built more and more hype, with one of the final songs to release before the project, “BOYS” premiering on Beats1 Radio on Apple Music. The group’s chemistry and their unique music videos quickly found a larger and larger audience, highlighting the talents of a diverse group of members, including rappers, singers, directors, visual artists, and producers. All members of the group (excluding singer Bearface who was in the UK until the day of the album's release) lived together in a house in Van Nuys, California for the creation of the album.

Review

When reading an album of the year writeup for BROCKHAMPTON’s debut album, SATURATION, given the state of this corner of the internet, most people would expect the reviewer to try as hard as possible to refute criticism of the music, and to argue that the group is something unique and special. The music isn’t perfect, but they are doing something special. There are valid criticisms: while rapper Dom McLennon impresses with his technical ability the content of his verses can at times be entirely abstract and unrelated to the song, and Merlyn Wood, while fun and energetic, is justly divisive in the vocal performances and style he can bring to a track. The oft repeated lines of “Kevin always raps about being gay” or “Ameer always raps about dealing” (and just where will Dom’s heart be put next?) while true, aren’t necessarily bad things, and the members of the group have responded within their own music in an adequate manner. This album isn’t necessarily even the best album of the year. An argument could be made that the sequel, SATURATION II is better, as well as projects such as who told you to think​?​?​!​!​?​!​?​!​?​! by Milo or 4:44 by Jay-Z. An album such as 4:44 will invariably go down in hip hop’s canon as a classic, a step in the right direction for the craft. So, given all of this, declaring SATURATION to be album of the year seems confusing.

A project has to be the most enjoyable music released within a year for it to be the defining album of that year. Let it not be taken, however, that this is saying that BROCKHAMPTON has made a genre-defining album: they’re simply too obscure at this point for that. But at a critical level, SATURATION does serve as an album that embodies the state of Hip-Hop in 2017. In fact, the album at times reads as a revue of hip-hop, opening up with a stretch of songs that switches from gritty and aggressive to smooth and danceable.

BROCKHAMPTON are something special. Not because they formed over the internet: of course groups like Odd Future have already done that more famously. While Odd Future tapped into this punk destructive energy that allowed them to set a fire with the youth of America, BROCKHAMPTON are tapping into a part of the genre often critically panned: pop rap. What BROCKHAMPTON is focused on is straddling a particular line: that between the poppy rap tunes of artists in the ilk of Recovery-era Eminem, and the aggressive offputting experimental hip hop of such groups as Death Grips. These aforementioned acts are direct influences on members of the group, as are such performers as M.I.A., Prince, Master P, Lil Wayne, Kid Cudi, Kanye, and the list goes on. These artists styles would seem to clash with each other and BROCKHAMPTON exists on that very point of conflict. Their music serves as an answer to the question of being both accessible and off putting, and they manage those two lanes beautifully.

BROCKHAMPTON crafts tunes that are both poppy and experimental. Even if your tastes are weirder than the music that the group produces, it’s disingenuous to suggest that their music isn’t weird to your average listener. Switching from distorted bass and manic rapping to a soft acoustic guitar and crooning simply (a la “BUMP”) isn’t something in a lot of rap that many people find accessible. People can’t be blamed for finding highly experimental music off putting, but it is a shame that people don’t listen to it because of that unease that it creates. SATURATION exists as an inbetween point: “FAKE” has quickly become a favourite for many from the project. And when you think about it, that is strange. The verses are pitch shifted, the beat is wonky (thriving from the same Pharrell influence that most of their production does), and the subject matter is deliberately off putting. But the hook is undeniably catchy. Tracks like “FAKE” are easy to listen to and yet have weirder depths to them.

“HEAT” is perhaps the best example of this. “HEAT” isn’t a purely political song. For many of the members it’s more personal than that, with rapper Matt Champion talking about his experience being cheated on, or Dom McLennon talking about his feeling unable to be around other people. But there certainly is a political bite to it: not too heavy handed at all, but there. The messages and themes in the song become available to anybody who wants to find them: a classic anti-cop rap sentiment, the politics of drug dealing, a sense of discontentment with the state of the world. They’re setting up a world for the viewer that while ultimately escapist, does remind the listener of the realities back home.

When BROCKHAMPTON keeps on rapping about how different they are, how special their music is, it can seem like the yuppie protagonists of a blockbuster film at times: i.e that these are people who exist in this idealised world that just isn’t real. Perfectly relatable, both broke and receiving riches, self-loathing and cocky, a nonexistent contradiction. But there is always that bite of home: the message that brings the group back to where they really are. While Ameer Vann can rap about dealing and make it sound cool, this showmanship also functions as an exploration of his real past. While so much of the album is concerned with dreaming of them in the spotlight, future kings of music, we are reminded every now and then of what they’re running away from, whether it be disappointed parents or the general weight of the world. There’s a sad beauty in their flights of fancy, and it comes across elegantly in their music.

You don’t have to like BROCKHAMPTON’s music to appreciate them, and they should be appreciated for what they’re doing. Artists shouldn’t have to live in a world in which they have a choice between making a living or making art. The viewer shouldn’t have to choose between self-obsessed works of auteurs and worldly but ultimately milquetoast mainstream pieces. Many shy away from this altogether: they just pick a side and they’re done with it: they’ll make their money and not care what the critics say, or they’ll make their original ideas flourish and not care about the money. Sometimes, creative people strike on something so good that people listen to it and support them anyways. The fact that BROCKHAMPTON are trying to create a roadmap to striking that gold, and are attempting to remove the fog of mystery that lies over the line between experimental and popular is commendable. They’re not there yet, but they’re certainly on to something. SATURATION is the starting point for it all.

Favorite Lyrics

“I’ve got pipe dreams of crack rocks and stripper poles”

“HEAT”

“I got a dream I'm willing to die for

I got a team I'll commit a crime for

Got some dead homies I ain't get to cry for

'Cause I'm working for my freedom, while the world cry war

Cry wolf when the shepherd finds a way to strike gold

'Cause the stocks gon' crash and the dollar gon' fold

You don't know that the poor eat the rich when there's no profit

They gave you the floor but you brought up the wrong topic”

“CASH”

“Was I more than it's worth

Or will you see my name and I'll fade?

Pitch my camp in your mind

Sat by the fire, behind your eyes

And I'll look through them just once or twice

But I might see something I don't like

Like your hands in his shirt

Entwined in cotton, his loving smirk”

“WASTE”

Discussion Questions

BROCKHAMPTON’s career is on an upwards trajectory in terms of popularity, and yet there’s still a raging debate over how relevant they truly are. At what point is an artist no longer a “nobody”? At what point is an artist “relevant”? Is BROCKHAMPTON relevant?

BROCKHAMPTON insist that they are not a rap group but in fact a “boy band”. What do you think of this? Do you agree with this statement? Why do you think they claim this?

Once the SATURATION trilogy ends, what direction should BROCKHAMPTON go next (who knows what's happening with that SATURATION III announcement)?

Thanks for reading!

Be sure to check out the other BROCKHAMPTON writeup for today, done by the great /u/snidelaughter, as well as tomorrow’s writeup for billy woods terrific album, “Known Unknowns”, done by the amazing /u/ReptiIe!

Artist: BROCKHAMPTONAlbum: SATURATIONListen:YoutubeApple Music/iTunesGoogle Play MusicTidalNapsterSpotifyAlbum Background:BROCKHAMPTON formed in 2015, largely as a rebirth of a group known as ASF (AliveSinceForever). Over the course of the next two years, they dropped a few singles, eventually releasing a mixtape by the name of “ALL AMERICAN TRASH” in the summer of 2016. That winter, frontman of the group Kevin Abstract released his sophomore album “American Boyfriend”, touring for the album and earning a following and notoriety for the larger group. Then, in the spring of 2017, the group returned with the first single from SATURATION, “FACE”. In the space of around a month, they reportedly created around 40 songs for their sophomore mixtape, which evolved into their debut album. Of those 40 songs, 14 made the cut, in addition to 3 skits, creating a 17 track album. With each single leading up to the album, they steadily built more and more hype, with one of the final songs to release before the project, “BOYS” premiering on Beats1 Radio on Apple Music. The group’s chemistry and their unique music videos quickly found a larger and larger audience, highlighting the talents of a diverse group of members, including rappers, singers, directors, visual artists, and producers. All members of the group (excluding singer Bearface who was in the UK until the day of the album's release) lived together in a house in Van Nuys, California for the creation of the album.ReviewWhen reading an album of the year writeup for BROCKHAMPTON’s debut album, SATURATION, given the state of this corner of the internet, most people would expect the reviewer to try as hard as possible to refute criticism of the music, and to argue that the group is something unique and special. The music isn’t perfect, but they are doing something special. There are valid criticisms: while rapper Dom McLennon impresses with his technical ability the content of his verses can at times be entirely abstract and unrelated to the song, and Merlyn Wood, while fun and energetic, is justly divisive in the vocal performances and style he can bring to a track. The oft repeated lines of “Kevin always raps about being gay” or “Ameer always raps about dealing” (and just where will Dom’s heart be put next?) while true, aren’t necessarily bad things, and the members of the group have responded within their own music in an adequate manner. This album isn’t necessarily even the best album of the year. An argument could be made that the sequel, SATURATION II is better, as well as projects such as who told you to think​?​?​!​!​?​!​?​!​?​! by Milo or 4:44 by Jay-Z. An album such as 4:44 will invariably go down in hip hop’s canon as a classic, a step in the right direction for the craft. So, given all of this, declaring SATURATION to be album of the year seems confusing.A project has to be the most enjoyable music released within a year for it to be the defining album of that year. Let it not be taken, however, that this is saying that BROCKHAMPTON has made a genre-defining album: they’re simply too obscure at this point for that. But at a critical level, SATURATION does serve as an album that embodies the state of Hip-Hop in 2017. In fact, the album at times reads as a revue of hip-hop, opening up with a stretch of songs that switches from gritty and aggressive to smooth and danceable.BROCKHAMPTON are something special. Not because they formed over the internet: of course groups like Odd Future have already done that more famously. While Odd Future tapped into this punk destructive energy that allowed them to set a fire with the youth of America, BROCKHAMPTON are tapping into a part of the genre often critically panned: pop rap. What BROCKHAMPTON is focused on is straddling a particular line: that between the poppy rap tunes of artists in the ilk of Recovery-era Eminem, and the aggressive offputting experimental hip hop of such groups as Death Grips. These aforementioned acts are direct influences on members of the group, as are such performers as M.I.A., Prince, Master P, Lil Wayne, Kid Cudi, Kanye, and the list goes on. These artists styles would seem to clash with each other and BROCKHAMPTON exists on that very point of conflict. Their music serves as an answer to the question of being both accessible and off putting, and they manage those two lanes beautifully.BROCKHAMPTON crafts tunes that are both poppy and experimental. Even if your tastes are weirder than the music that the group produces, it’s disingenuous to suggest that their music isn’t weird to your average listener. Switching from distorted bass and manic rapping to a soft acoustic guitar and crooning simply (a la “BUMP”) isn’t something in a lot of rap that many people find accessible. People can’t be blamed for finding highly experimental music off putting, but it is a shame that people don’t listen to it because of that unease that it creates. SATURATION exists as an inbetween point: “FAKE” has quickly become a favourite for many from the project. And when you think about it, that is strange. The verses are pitch shifted, the beat is wonky (thriving from the same Pharrell influence that most of their production does), and the subject matter is deliberately off putting. But the hook is undeniably catchy. Tracks like “FAKE” are easy to listen to and yet have weirder depths to them.“HEAT” is perhaps the best example of this. “HEAT” isn’t a purely political song. For many of the members it’s more personal than that, with rapper Matt Champion talking about his experience being cheated on, or Dom McLennon talking about his feeling unable to be around other people. But there certainly is a political bite to it: not too heavy handed at all, but there. The messages and themes in the song become available to anybody who wants to find them: a classic anti-cop rap sentiment, the politics of drug dealing, a sense of discontentment with the state of the world. They’re setting up a world for the viewer that while ultimately escapist, does remind the listener of the realities back home.When BROCKHAMPTON keeps on rapping about how different they are, how special their music is, it can seem like the yuppie protagonists of a blockbuster film at times: i.e that these are people who exist in this idealised world that just isn’t real. Perfectly relatable, both broke and receiving riches, self-loathing and cocky, a nonexistent contradiction. But there is always that bite of home: the message that brings the group back to where they really are. While Ameer Vann can rap about dealing and make it sound cool, this showmanship also functions as an exploration of his real past. While so much of the album is concerned with dreaming of them in the spotlight, future kings of music, we are reminded every now and then of what they’re running away from, whether it be disappointed parents or the general weight of the world. There’s a sad beauty in their flights of fancy, and it comes across elegantly in their music.You don’t have to like BROCKHAMPTON’s music to appreciate them, and they should be appreciated for what they’re doing. Artists shouldn’t have to live in a world in which they have a choice between making a living or making art. The viewer shouldn’t have to choose between self-obsessed works of auteurs and worldly but ultimately milquetoast mainstream pieces. Many shy away from this altogether: they just pick a side and they’re done with it: they’ll make their money and not care what the critics say, or they’ll make their original ideas flourish and not care about the money. Sometimes, creative people strike on something so good that people listen to it and support them anyways. The fact that BROCKHAMPTON are trying to create a roadmap to striking that gold, and are attempting to remove the fog of mystery that lies over the line between experimental and popular is commendable. They’re not there yet, but they’re certainly on to something. SATURATION is the starting point for it all.Favorite Lyrics“I’ve got pipe dreams of crack rocks and stripper poles”“HEAT”“I got a dream I'm willing to die forI got a team I'll commit a crime forGot some dead homies I ain't get to cry for'Cause I'm working for my freedom, while the world cry warCry wolf when the shepherd finds a way to strike gold'Cause the stocks gon' crash and the dollar gon' foldYou don't know that the poor eat the rich when there's no profitThey gave you the floor but you brought up the wrong topic”“CASH”“Was I more than it's worthOr will you see my name and I'll fade?Pitch my camp in your mindSat by the fire, behind your eyesAnd I'll look through them just once or twiceBut I might see something I don't likeLike your hands in his shirtEntwined in cotton, his loving smirk”“WASTE”Discussion QuestionsBROCKHAMPTON’s career is on an upwards trajectory in terms of popularity, and yet there’s still a raging debate over how relevant they truly are. At what point is an artist no longer a “nobody”? At what point is an artist “relevant”? Is BROCKHAMPTON relevant?BROCKHAMPTON insist that they are not a rap group but in fact a “boy band”. What do you think of this? Do you agree with this statement? Why do you think they claim this?Once the SATURATION trilogy ends, what direction should BROCKHAMPTON go next (who knows what's happening with that SATURATION III announcement)?Thanks for reading!Be sure to check out the other BROCKHAMPTON writeup for today, done by the great /u/snidelaughter, as well as tomorrow’s writeup for billy woods terrific album, “Known Unknowns”, done by the amazing /u/ReptiIe!