Fabulous Females

Summary:

Being a woman in a man's world isn't easy.

(But who needs easy?)

Rating: Mature Fandom: Naruto Relationship: Tenten & Kurotsuchi & Karui & Kurosuki Buntan & Temari & Karin, plus a host of others! Word Count: approximately 16K (Complete and posts one chapter daily)

This story is for @spookythevoidsinger​, @dawen​, @dominaaurum​, @greencuttingmat​, and @kurakura0-0​, all of whom chimed in on my discord server as I was writing it and suggested so many of the ideas which made it into this story.

Truly, it takes a village.

Kurotsuchi creeps into the room, silently thanking all the gods that the daimyo of Hatō no Kuni is arrogant enough not to pay for proper guards. If this monstrosity of a castle was being patrolled by shinobi from Amegakure, this would be a lot trickier.

As it is though, he puts far too much faith in his nobles and their soldiers.

She crawls down the walls, careful to avoid placing even the slightest pressure on the nightingale floor - she doesn't want to give herself away now, not after she spent so much effort getting into a country she has no business being in - and stretches her hand out for the pot which rests in the tokonoma.

An unassuming brown and made out of simple clay, she has trouble imagining that this is one of Kumogakure's greatest treasures, a tool handed down from the Sage of Six Paths himself. But everything her people have been able to discovers says that it's the Kohaku no Jōhei, and she smirks as she lays a hand on it.

Only... it doesn't move.

Is it... stuck?

She grabs it with both hands and yanks, only to find herself tugged in the opposite direction.

"Sorry, but this one's mine." The amused voice is low for a woman, but unmistakably feminine. "Don't you see our symbol on it?"

Read the rest on AO3.

swordsmen and their stims

(warning that a lot of these are Not healthy and several are unsanitary. im not condoning these as healthy coping mechanisms or anything, i’m simply making headcanons for a largely dead swathe of fictional murderers)

old generation:

zabuza: tears the ends of his bandages and headband, then tugs at the resulting threads. he’s on like headband strap 7 when we see him in land of waves. also in the cowprint outfit he pets the cow skin and runs his thumb under the strap.

haku (not technically a swordsman but shh): fiddles with senbon, rips/crunches herb leaves (but has to moderate this behavior so his fingers don’t smell too strongly.) if there are dry leaves on the ground tho he Must crunch them. he doesn’t like doing this in zabuza’s presence at first because he has to be a weapon!! but zabuza crunches them first to show him it’s ok, at least while they’re just travelling.

ameyuri: bites/chews on things!! will chew her sleeves or arm if there isn’t anything else, but has been known to tear bark off of a stick and chew on that. also repeats phrases, often under her breath and out of context (like yes she talks about stalking her prey when she’s chasing targets but also while she’s walking around the grocery store)

raiga: puts his fingers in and out of his silly gloves. tears anything and everything that he’s not wearing. touches the dull or flat parts of blades, jsut like rubbing his index finger on them. scratches himself, sometimes shocks himself with small amounts of electricity. and then there’s murder and untold destruction

mangetsu: fills up the tub and submerges himself in water. bounces on his toes. kind of inverse flaps? like instead of flapping his hands up by his head he’ll throw them at his sides like he’s dramatically trying to make a point but he’s not he just does that. will swing his arms by his sides too. practicing sword forms All The Time, and when a sword is not available he will make a water clone and have it transform into one. he can’t do this for v long tho bc the balance is never quite right :(

suigetsu: used to bounce too, but loses this post-orochimaru because he just doesn’t have the energy anymore. rocks back and forth when sitting and standing. shapeshifts!! into horrors! like he shapeshifts himself fur or scales when he needs something nice to touch. there’s also swimming but he has a love-hate relationship with that one for obvious reasons

kisame: pets samehada!! maintaining its bandages is a Good activity for him, even if cleaning gore from between its blades is not. grabbing the handle and swinging his elbow while he’s walking. recites shark facts in his head or verbally. 

chojuro: mei helps him get actual toys after the revolution when the economy opens up a little. he has a little silicon thing to chew on! and some worry stones that have strings tied through them that he can tug on, two-in-one type of thing. 

juzo: chews his lips. ties a bandage in a loop and fiddles them between his fingies (he offers this to itachi as well when they’re traveling together.) puts a finger through a kunai and flips it around. while wearing kubikiribocho sometimes he’ll rub the back of his head against the dull end.

kushimaru: picks his skin!! tugs at his neck bandages all the time. needlepoints. breaks thread on his fingers and/or on a blade very slowly so he can see the individual . tells himself jokes in his head and laughs at them

jinpachi: those ball things in his hair? always in his mouth. incidentally chews on his hair. bites his nails. his ultimate stim activity he’s not able to do v often though is starting a wood fire, he’ll stare at it for hours. if wood isn’t available he’ll use something else but it’s not as good :(

jinin: scratches his beard to the point of skin irritation. also picks at split ends and cracks knuckles, but to see him doing any of this is pretty rare.

new generation: 

shizuma: touches people!! esp exposed skin and hair. if he’s by himself he’ll talk to himself or scream, but he doesn’t do a lot of stim activities otherwise.

buntan: she touches grass!! goes out and plays with dirt, feels those natural textures. also has nice candles to smell. there are certain smells, like the same kind of alcohol her mom used to drink, that upset her, so controlling what she’s smelling is important to her. she’ll also lie down on the ground. horizontal time yes yes

hebiichigo: picks/scratches her skin (got that one from stripesquadsideblog) and also drawing on herself. just scribbles. there are seals on the insides of all her clothes sometimes by accident bc she’ll draw them on herself and they’ll rub off.

kyoho: rocks back and forth (this one kind of happens in canon iirc), cracks his knuckles, hums to himself. if he’s invited to he’ll pet people’s hair but he’s not as forward about it as shizuma is. very rarely he’ll put his fingers in his mouth, whether to chew on them or to feel the inside of his cheek.

ichirota: not so much outwardly stimming as running countless plans and things through his head at all times. if he’s deep into it he’ll snap at whoever’s interrupting. also cracks his knuckles but he hates it. 

hassaku: chews gum. rubs the underside of his neck. he has a little bit of stubble he likes to touch. sometimes he talks aggressively to himself, and it’s like two coherent words and then nonsense.

kagura: he hums and squeaks! tries to only when he’s alone but u know, things happen. hugs himself, plays w/ a bouncy ball from time to time. hand shaking for immediate maintenance. if he had one of those plastic tangles he would be the happiest boy.

After I watched the School Trip arc, I found myself thinking that Kagura is so... naive? AND HE IS REALLY STILL LIKE A CUTE LITTLE BABY. How old is he, actually? There is a statement that he is not far from the age of Boruto and friends, but how old Boruto and co. are not very clear there. In the description of kagura on the naruto wiki, it is recorded that the arc occurred 13 years after the war, which means that Boruto was 10 years old. Still, it happened after Naruto Gaiden/Sarada arc, where Sarada was already 11 years old. So I assume that Boruto is actually 11, 5 years old, and is in the last year of the Academy. Kagura's face is still very childish, but her grandfather, Yagura, also has the same look even though he is an adult. I thought at first he might be around 15/16, but at the end of the arc, I thought he wasn't really possibly more than 15 years old. About 14 years old?

I think because of growing up being shunned, Kagura becomes isolated and... very easy to trust other people? Like, you give him a little love or recognition, and he will follow you like a loyal puppy. Well, that's what happened to him and Shizuma.

And yes, Shizuma is a very creepy and manipulative person, although, in my opinion, the manipulation is not very subtle at all. I think Ichirota (grey hair, wielder of the Shibuki sword that Iwabee fought) could be the more dangerous leader of the bunch. Who is scarier among these seven new swordsmen from Kirigakure is Hebiichigo (a short girl who wields the Nuibari sword) because of her sadistic tendencies.

I found Hassaku (the person who first confronted Boruto with broccoli-shaped brown hair) and Kyoho (a big stature boy with a mask covering his face except for his eyes) not very interesting. They're just there... well, filling up space, I guess.

What is most interesting after Kagura among these seven people is Kurosuki Buntan. She had story potential to develop, even more so than Shizuma. I think it's because she's the only one given the background; depreciate mother, absent and/or dead father, and the belief that something has to be earned, so kekkei genkai is disgusting. I was amused when she confessed to Sarada that her father, Raiga, 'never knew she existed' and that Sarada didn't know what it was like to grow up with a parent not around.

(Kurosuki Raiga is the missing-nin from the left that Naruto and Team Gai met in the filler at the end of Part I--it's unknown whether Buntan was born after Raiga died or he just doesn't know.)

This is, well... funny, because we just got through the arc where Sarada chases and meets her father after all his absent years.

I think this is what makes Boruto less... interesting. The (most) antagonists in the story don't seem to have a solid footing, to begin with, and don't feel like three-dimensional characters. They exist to get in the way of the protagonist (aka, Boruto). After that, they were forgotten (at least I covered the antagonists in the anime-only arc).

Yes, the Shizuma gang wants to return Kiri to the bloody phase again. They value violence more--it seems to be a recurring topic in the series, how difficult it is for shinobi to come to terms with years of peace without war. Shizuma seems hurt by the notion that her family is considered a nuisance and not placed in the memorial. Why is his family deemed a nuisance? I thought because maybe, the Hoshigaki clan might have been pro-Yagura during his reign, and judging by how ruthless Shizuma was, I thought it was a product of his environment as well. But these things are just speculation; as the leader of the antagonist gang in that arc, Shizuma doesn't even have a solid background and motive.

We have Orochimaru, Zabuza-Haku, Gaara (for the time being), Madara, Danzo, and the members of Akatsuki as antagonists. You can include Sasuke too if you want, and Hiruzen with two of his Council members. Each of them has a different background but is solid. They are not just criminals; they are human too. This makes for an exciting story to follow.

Well, there are always exceptions for Kaguya and Black Zetsu. The first one is basically... alien. Which suddenly appears to tie the whole plot together, less neatly, I might say. And Black Zetsu is not human--he is an entity. Naruto himself said he couldn't empathize with Kaguya because she seemed heartless. And Naruto really EMPATHY everyone, including Obito, who indirectly caused his parents' death, so. It should count as something.

And as we travel through Boruto, we see that... the original Ootsuki clan is indeed... aliens. Which is strange, inhuman. Oh my God, I really wonder what Jigen was up to during that millennium. Yes, gathering Inner and Outer members for Kara, but then... what? He can't get scientists to do body modifications and so on. A millennium ago, there was no electricity, no laboratories.

Hah, wondering what Black Zetsu knows about Jigen and Isshiki in Jigen's brain.

Well, we can always wait for the Boruto manga to be continued every month and see the development of the antagonists in the series and this strange alien clan. Hoping the plot's ending will be tied nicely and neatly so that there is no need to bring up something kaboom kaboom alien parasitic horned celestial beings, as people sometimes joke; at Saruto--Boruto Next Generations.

i mentioned a boruto-era seven swordsmen band so here we go

going from left to right (bc i know some of u are like me and don’t know them by name)

-Buntan is usually backup vocals and tambourine but if they need a kinda out-there instrument like a viola or a piccolo she’s got it

-Hebiichigo, who, fun fact, doesn’t have a last name, plays electric guitar and does backup vocals too. she is really fun to draw!! i like her long pointy eyeliner.

-Shizuma is an idiot and can’t play any instruments (unrelated to the idiot thing) but he’s pretty and sings decently so he’s the frontman, along with writing the bulk of the songs.

-Ichirōta, who has a really good sounding name, plays keytar. bc. why not

-Kyohō is the drummer bc i couldn’t think of anything else for him other than like, playing a cello like a guitar

-Hassaku plays bass. his shirt has a stick figure being beheaded by a guillotine bc he had the executioner’s blade and i thought it would be funny

they make “fuck the government” music that boruto really likes before he realizes who they are (he doesn’t stop listening to them actually, he’s just less enthusiastic abt it. he takes mitsuki out on a date to their concert when they come to a town near konoha and he spends the entire night making this :| face)

i don’t have an idea for a name for their band so if u do. pls throw it out 2 me :)

Triangle        Δ

im stupid 

College AU versions of the New Seven Ninja Ninja Swordsmen(minus Kyoho, sorry Kyoho). Edit: I have no idea how it happened but I got Shizuma’s hair backwards, whoops. Individual versions under the cut:

KaguBoru💞 Credit To The artist!

Well, since everyone seems pretty OK with Shizuma being all touchy-feely...

Kiri Boruto Arc Novelisation

The novelisation of the Kiri Field Trip arc just arrived, so did a quick skim to try and find out which extra bits that aren't in the anime I should translate first!

So far, it looks like - There's a coloured anime concept art poster for the New Swordsmen, and a couple of illustrations throughout the book - Sarada and Buntan meet earlier on the field trip near the end of chapter 2 as she's leaving Kirigakure tower, taking place the day before the fight. Buntan seems to grab a handkerchief Sarada is buying, and then Buntan is curious about her being an Uchiha - Sumire seems to appear much more in the early chapters - I swear someone grins or laughs on every page the Kiri nin appear on - Shizuma and Buntan love their double exclamation marks and I am not surprised

- Kagura and Yagura’s names are written in phonetically in hiragana instead of phonetic katakana as per Naruto norm or kanji as per Kirigakure norm. The only other clan to do this is the Yamanaka who they look a bit like

- Characters change pronouns a bit, possibly putting on an act. Kagura starts off using the formal watashi, making him one of very few male Naruto characters to do so (also includes Iruka, Ebisu, Orochimaru and Kisame), before switching to the rough, macho ore that is the standard Naruto guy pronoun when he joins Shizuma's gang, but still otherwise speaks very formally.  Buntan also starts with watashi when she meets Sarada, before switching to the more tomboyish/casual/confident atashi for the rest of the novel (also used by Ino, Tenten, Tsunade and Guren). She also uses omae for you (instead of the usual anata) which is normally used by men who use ore - as far as I can remember she is the only female character in the series to do so - more assertive, and in the context of using it on an opponent, insulting. - Kisame is mentioned in regards to Shizuma twice, once over about a page. The Akatsuki are also mentioned a lot -Early in their fight, Sarada and Buntan have a long conversation about Obito Uchiha, both in relation to Yagura and Madara - Sarada repeats Itachi's catchphrase ('iya, chigau' - 'no, incorrect/it's different') during this discussion - It seems like Buntan's mother has also died by the time of the arc - Sasuke's jutsu, Kirin, is mentioned at the end of Sarada's fight with Buntan ('In other words, Kirin') - The kanji 敵, 'opponent/rival/enemy' appears a lot as a concept in Sarada's thoughts in the last couple of chapters (eg 'She'd been her enemy.....Kurosuki Buntan?' as she's traveling home)

Playing With Pups

Summary:

Shizuma is angry.

(But that's not all he is.)

Takes place between 1918 and 1923.

Rating: Mature Fandom: Naruto Relationship: Hoshigaki Shizuma/Kurosuki Buntan Word Count: approximately 11,000 words (Complete and posts one chapter daily)

This story is for @dominaaurum​ who told me about Shizuma and for @misttiddies​ who influenced his characterisation in so many ways.

Shizuma holds on to his prey, refusing to let go.

Its beak bites into the flesh of his shoulder and its arms twine with his, leaving sucker marks in its desperate bid to escape, but he only grips tighter. Digging this octopus out of its den was hard enough, he doesn't want to have to do it all over again.

It finally goes limp, ceasing its struggles as life leaves it, and he kicks his way out from under the rocks and towards cleaner water. Only when he's out of the ink cloud does he allow his gill slits to open, taking in desperately needed breaths.

The octopus fought well and intelligently, releasing ink to blind him and better its own chances of survival, but it was a battle of wills in the end. He had the control not to breathe, not to take the ink into his body, but the octopus didn't.

It's as simple as that.

Now if only the rest of his life could be as easy.

Read the rest on AO3.

haku week day five??

haku lives au!!

haku and chojuro become great friends (hopefully so great that he can talk chojuro out of some of his more questionable mizukage decisions) and becomes a jonin-sensei (probably not to buntan and shizuma but @rainegrenade mentioned it so i had to make it happen.) :3c

this comic is not my idea though i searched high and low for the original. if you know it please send me the link so i can give proper credit!

look at my CHILDREN

ok so we got a better look at the new seven ninja swordsmen . massive sarcasm quotes around "swordsmen"

we've got:

hassaku who has an unnatural attachment to a sword he has had for 5 minutes and doesn't know how to use

Hebiichigo, a sword enthusiast who's afraid of swords

Kyoho who promised to murder chojuro and then not 30 seconds later folded like a house of cards because chojuro poked 2 of his team mates with part of a broken sword

Buntan who harbors daddy issues the way a paddling pool harbors an ocean liner

and Ichirota who got stabbed by a brat with a stick and a bad hat.

well done shizuma you really picked some winners here

please no. my fragile heart can stop