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daydividesthenight-blog1 · 6 years

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Waist Deep In Thoughts (SL with @SinfulMyrick and @FiredUpAndTired)

Cay: ^I still wasn’t sure about this trip. But Daddy said we had to go. He was being summoned, and now was as good as time as any to introduce me to his family. I had to admit that I wasn’t excited. Not completely. The only person in his family I wanted to meet was his little sister Emily.

Daddy talked about her the most. She was the one he missed the most. He was content with the phone calls from his mom. But never talked about his dad or brother. And I understood it. They put too much pressure on him to be something he wasn’t. He was supposed to be a lawyer. He was supposed to be settling down. He was supposed to be on his way to having 2.5 kids, a golden retriever, and a white picket fence. He was halfway there on the last parts, though. He had me, Watson, and Leo.

We had had about a dozen conversations about coming up here. I was terrified, though. They were everything that I had never been. Prim and proper to the extreme with high expectations of their children. I didn’t think that I was going to fit in. Of course, if I was the good little catholic girl I had been raised to be, it would have been different. But I wasn’t.

I was covered in tattoos and had a mouth like a sailor. But it was something I never used around Daddy. He was too pure to deal with my mouth. It was something I let Sir see, though. We had discussed how I was supposed to address him. Daddy didn’t care. If I wanted to call him Daddy, that was fine. But it was something I hesitated on. I didn’t want to give his family another reason to get on him. But I wasn’t comfortable calling him Myrick, either. It wasn’t something I had ever called him. It came out the first time he came to the shop, only because I wasn’t sure if he wanted me to call him Daddy.

But I still needed something to call him when his family was around. So I had settled on Noah. It wasn’t outside of the realm of possibility. It was his middle name, so it was something we could use. And I didn’t want to put him in the mindframe his family was going to put him in. Having him be Myrick was not something I wanted on a daily basis. And I never wanted him to get used to it coming from my mouth.

Part of me had wanted to go into the Baines house completely covered. I didn’t want them to see my tattoos and have a reason to judge me. But I knew how much Daddy loved them. It was something that would keep him centered. If things got to be too much, I could let him run his fingers along the colors. And even then, it was just going to be my legs that were visible. At least for tonight. I had brought a few other dresses that would leave my arms exposed. Today was a simple black and white plaid dress with a high low hem line. It wasn’t tight, but didn’t hide my belly that was growing more each day.

I let out a soft groan as Watson kicked against my stomach. It was still hard to believe, but he was more active now that Daddy and I could feel him moving. Squeezing Daddy’s hand, I shifted ever so slightly so I was facing him as he continued down the residential roads of Hartford.^ Even your son doesn’t want to do this, Daddy. We could turn around and go back home.

Myrick: -She had a point. I didn’t want to do this, not even a little bit. There wasn’t anything in the world that was going to make me want to go back home to Hartford for my dad’s birthday, even though my mother managed to guilt trip me into doing it most years. I wasn’t the son they’d wanted after all these years. I knew that every time I walked into that huge house. It never felt like home, even if I’d grown up there, and they never felt like family, even if genetically they were. My brother had always fit into that world. He’d been born into it. Maybe I had too, but I’d been raised by the staff more than my parents. They were too busy for me. My mother had one junior league meeting and luncheon or gala or fundraiser after another. My father was running a business. Neither one of them had time for three children.

It was Em that got the worst of it. She was their only daughter. That came with a whole other passel of expectations -- dance lessons, etiquette classes, debutante balls, ball gowns, the endless parade of eligible bachelors my mother was inviting over to dinner as prospective grooms. It was annoying just to watch. To be the subject of it must have been nightmarish. But she was better at pretending than I ever was going to be.

I’d given up on being what they wanted. I tried to do pre-law. I tried harder than anyone knew, and it almost broke me. Then, one day, I just gave up on that life. I switched my college major to art and just went with the thing that felt most natural to me. That was when everything had begun. I’d never fit in there. I wasn’t the perfect kid. My clothes were stained with paint or markers or dirt when I was supposed to keep clean. My curly hair was too unruly and defied any amount of styling that they tried to inflict upon it. Bradley was their perfect first kid. He was the one who went on to be lawyer and was walking in our dad’s footsteps. I wasn’t ever going to be like him, and I wasn’t even going to try.

In a way, it was freeing to let go of their expectations of me. I was free to be myself for the first time, and living in New York City had given me the space to do just that, but I still had ties to them. I’d pulled enough money out of my trust fund for my mother to notice. I’d promised myself I wouldn’t touch it unless I absolutely had to, that I was going to make my own way with my art for as long as I could. Part of it was a pride thing. I wanted to prove them all wrong when they said that art wasn’t going to pay the bills. I’d been successful thus far, but tapping into that money to buy a condo for Cay was more than worth the hassle that had come with it. It just meant that my mother had successfully guilt tripped me into coming home for Dad’s birthday this year. Her learning that she was going to be a grandmother just ensured that the guilt trip got doubled. She wanted to meet Cay. She wanted to know my fiance and she had a gift for Waston. She wanted to do a lot, but I was wary about how much involvement they wanted to have.

I honestly didn’t want him to grow up in that world I’d left behind. I didn’t think Cay would have either. I did feel a sense of obligation to make sure that he knew his grandparents, but that was a weak connection. It meant he would have to show up at Christmas or odd holidays just to keep them quiet about never getting to see their grandson, but every day? They weren’t the kind of family I wanted around every day. I didn’t want him getting the patented Baines guilt trip any more than necessary. I was already feeling protective of him and his mother, and he wasn’t even born yet. It was only going to get worse once he’d arrived. I let my fingers move over her stomach, enjoying the gentle rolling of his movements just under her skin.- Baby Love, we will only stay as long as we have to and then we’re out of here. Besides, I want you to meet Emily. She’s going to be here this weekend, too. I know she’s going to love you and the baby. I don’t really care about the rest of them. I’m just going to get through this weekend and then go back to pretending they don’t exist as often as I can manage.

Cay: ^As we pulled up to the house, I felt my nerves go through the roof. I still wasn’t sure about this. I didn’t know what we were getting ourselves into. I couldn’t plan or make contingencies. I had almost wished he had brought Nightingale instead of me. She would have been the perfect girlfriend to bring home to his parents. She was the girl they would love.

Turning to the man next to me, I let the panic be written on my face. I needed this moment to be afraid. I needed a minute where I could just need my Daddy. And part of me knew, deep down, that he needed this as much as I needed it.^ They’re going to hate me, Daddy. I’m not what they want for you. You should have brought NIghtingale. She would have been better.

^I was working myself up. I needed to figure out a way to calm down. I didn’t need to let this get the best of me. I had to focus on what I could control. But it felt like the answer was nothing. I knew the kind of people The Baines men were. They were pushy and judgemental. And the women just followed behind them. It was all about appearances with them. And I was terrified what they were going to say about me and Watson.^

Myrick: -we were here, but there was no way I was getting out of the car with her this upset. I personally didn’t care what they thought. I was used to being the one who disappointed all of them, but this was a first for her. I felt like it wasn’t fair of me to drag her into all of this. My family life was chaotic, but not in the way a lot of families were. It seemed calm and serene on the outside, full of well mannered people minding their Ps and Qs. On the inside, it was filled with more politics than a UN Security Council meeting. Cay deserved better than all of that. I turned and took her hands in mine, looking her square in the eye- Baby Love, I love you. I care about Songbird, but I’m in love with you. You’re having my son, and you’re the person I want to spend the rest of my life with. I don’t care what they think of you. I wouldn’t love you as much as I did if you were the type of person who was going to fit in here. I don’t fit in here. The only people who do are pretending and dying on the inside. I don’t want either of us to be that. If you want to go at any point just say the word and we’ll leave. If it’s too late to go back to the city we’ll get a hotel in Hartford so don’t let the hour stop you. Just say the word and we go.

Cay: ^I knew that he was right. Even if Watson hadn’t been in the picture, Daddy and I were perfect for each other. We just needed to be reminded of that some of the time. We both had a tendency to get so wrapped up in our heads, we forgot to see the world in color. And now we were in a place where we were only going to see black and white. His family was only going to let us see in black and white.

With the exception of Emily. Everything that Daddy had told me about her meant she was the wildcard. When he first told me that she fit in with the Baines group, I was nervous. But then he explained that she was the best actress of them all. She was just like him, in a way. She didn’t necessarily want the whole Baines name, but she did know how to use it. She was the only reason I was willing to give this a chance. She was the only one I was somewhat excited to meet.^

Am I allowed to hide with Emily if it gets to be too much? Like, if you have to leave me alone, can you please make sure Emily is there? I just don’t know how to handle your family. And I don’t want to be left defenseless. And if your family is how you describe them, they’re going to try to separate us for at least part of the visit.

Myrick: -Cay had a good point, and it was one I hadn’t thought of. Emily was always a calm in the storm for me. She’d walk around the house all prim and proper, dressed any way that made mother happy, and shoot me winks from across the table that made me know she had something planned for after dinner. I’d seen her toilet paper the minister’s house in spotless white Easter gloves and a flowery dress and not get home spotless before the end of a dinner party. She was also the one who drug me off to a hiding spot in the attic she’d found when we were kids if the entire family got to be too much for me. If I’d been diagnosed with anything it would have wound up being anxiety. I knew myself well enough to know that sometimes the expectation of being one of them just got to be too much, too overwhelming. She was right. They were going to separate us, but if I knew anything, Mother would send all the men into the library and keep the girls doing something else, so Emily would always be around if I wasn’t. She’d take care of my girl as much as she’d taken care of me.-

I think that won’t be a problem. I won’t let them take me from you if she can’t stay. I’ll pull her aside as soon as we get there and make sure she knows not to leave you alone with any of them. She probably wouldn’t anyway, because she knows all of them well enough not to trust them.

Cay: ^Everything was starting to hit me. This wasn’t something that we were putting off anymore. We were here, and I had to be that girl. I had to be the girl that deserved their son. Granted, I wasn’t going to be the girl they were expecting. But I knew I was stressing myself out. And as I was stressing, I felt the final worry settle into place.

Age had never been a thing with me and Daddy. The only time it ever did come up was when we were either in the club or at dinner together. Daddy could drink, I couldn’t. Not that Daddy liked to drink. In the time we had known each other, I had never seen him take a drink. It didn’t matter. It just made things a little bit easier for the both of us.

But I wasn’t sure how his family was going to handle it. There were so many things that could be said. And, in reality, I knew how they were going to see me. I was 19 and had gotten pregnant. Now, Daddy was tapping into his trust fund so that he could buy me a condo. I was everything they didn’t want in their family. Shaking my head, I just stared out the front window.^ I’ve never been with you for your money. You know that, right?

Myrick: -I wasn’t sure where that last question had come from. It wasn’t something that had ever crossed my mind. I made a point of not using my trust fund to live off of. I had a reason for that. It was my way of proving to my parents that I could make it on my own. I wasn’t ever going to be their definition of successful but I could be my own. That was what mattered to me, and yeah, I’d bought Cay a condo. But it wasn’t something she’d asked for. I’d gone out and done that entirely on my own.

I was a lot older than her. I knew that she was going think that was an issue too even if she didn’t say it. She thought it was a problem that she was too young. Occasionally, I thought it was a problem that I was too old. It wasn’t going to stop me though, and in a few years it wouldn’t be an issue at all. Eight years wasn’t that uncommon, but she was still technically a teenager, even if she had a better head on her shoulders than most adults I knew-

Yeah, I know. Just remember that they don’t know you, and they’re never going to really know you. They don’t really know their own children. If they did, they’d know how fake Emily was around them, and how much they’ve made me hate being home. They’d know this isn’t really home, because home is in a Hell’s Kitchen condo with you. So try not to let what they think of you matter too much. They don’t really like anyone, not even themselves.

Cay: They’re going to think that. They’re going to find out that I’m not even 20, and they’re going to assume that I’m with you just so I can get your trust fund. And it’s not something I want, Daddy. I don’t need your money. I just need you. I need you to be there for me and Watson. Please don’t abandon us.

^I couldn’t stop the tears from sliding down my cheeks. Abandonment was going to be a huge fear. I wasn’t sure that was ever going to go away. Not after what had happened before. I wasn’t sure that fear was going to be one I could cope with. But I knew I had to be honest with Daddy. I wasn’t sure what was going to happen this weekend. I just needed to remind myself that this wasn’t who he was. He was different than them. He was the black sheep in his family.

Swiping at my cheeks, I tried to make everything stop. I needed everything to just stop for a second. What I really needed was my dog. But this was the last place he could come. Especially if Myrick wasn’t exaggerating about his parents. I didn’t want them to force him to be locked in the backyard. Even if it would have been heaven for Leo. But the best decision had been leaving him home with Nightingale.

Cassidy had decided she was going to run the shop this weekend since Lindsay was still a little too new to it. So it gave Leo the perfect person to be watched with. She had the time to devote to him. Since she was done work on the album, she had time to spend with him. And it would give her something to do while Sir was at the studio.

I let my voice come out in the small shyness I only tended to use when I was unsure of myself. If I couldn’t have Leo, I had to take the next best thing to calm me down.^ Daddy? Can you please just hold me for a few minutes before we have to go inside? I need a few more minutes of being Daddy and Baby Love before we have to be Noah and Cay.

Myrick: -That was an easy enough request. I didn’t care how long we sat out in the drive and just talked. My mother was likely staring out between the blinds at us and conjecturing about why we hadn’t come inside yet. But I didn’t care. My girl needed me, and she was the most important thing right now in my entire world. So she could have anything that she wanted right now. She didn’t have to come up here with me. I could have done it on my own, but I wanted her with me as selfish as that sounded to me.

I promised myself I was going to take the best care of her that I could manage this weekend and if that meant making everyone else in the house angry, then they’d eventually get over themselves. I pulled her into my arms and wrapped them around her, planting a kiss on her forehead- Baby Love, whatever you need is yours.

Cay: I need you to tell me that this is going to work out. One way or another. Promise me that you won’t let them change you. ^It was a fear I had. I wasn’t thrilled with the fact that I had it, but it was there. It was something I didn’t want to think about. But I needed to hear it from him. I needed Daddy to tell me that I was his. No matter what happened this weekend, I was still going to be his Baby Love.

It didn’t matter that we were putting on a show for them. We were letting them see what they wanted to see. And not who we were. If I had my way, they were never going to see Daddy and Baby Love. It wasn’t something I wanted them to tarnish. Daddy and Baby Love were for New York. They were when we were at home.

Looking up to Daddy with a raised brow, I let out a soft giggle.^ Can we mandate that they have to call me Caoilainn?

Myrick: -I grinned down at my girl and stole another kiss letting out a soft laugh- You’re whoever you want to be to them, but you’re my Baby Love. As far as I’m concerned we’re just pretending here. At home is something very different, and this isn’t going to change any of that. I love you no matter what.

-I wasn’t just saying that because it was what I figured my girl needed to hear right now. She did need to hear it, but I needed to say it too. I wanted her to know I wasn’t anything like these people, and I was a little terrified that she would think I was even a little bit like them-

And whatever happens, please know I’m not like them. Neither is Em. They’re our family by blood and genetic lottery. That is all. We spent more time with the nannies they hired to take care of us than we ever spent with them.

Cay: ^I could only let out a laugh. As scared as I was that Daddy was going to run away after all of this, I knew the truth. Him and Em were only a Baines in name. Was I scared of what was about to happen? Absolutely. But I knew that this was more about my fear of his family than anything else.

I needed to relax and remember who I was standing with. This was the man I had agreed to marry. The man that was the father to my child. He was going to do everything in his power to protect me. Even if it meant taking me out of here. I had to remember that. My voice was soft as I shifted my eyes around the front windows. More than once I had seen the curtains open and close. We were being watched.^

Someone keeps looking out here. I guess that means this is it? I have to flip off the Baby Love switch for the weekend. I can’t be your little. I have to just be your fiance?

^I had to admit that I wasn’t thrilled with the idea of not being his little. But that was something I had decided on. I needed to be his girl, yes. But I still wasn’t entirely sure I was ready to throw our sexlife into the middle of the world like that. That was still something I wanted to keep for us when we were home in New York.^

Myrick: -I knew we were being watched. That much was obvious. I didn’t see enough and I wasn’t going to explain myself any more than necessary. There were a lot of things about my life that was none of their business. There were times in the past I just avoided them. I didn’t like the confrontation, but for Cay, I’d confront every last one of them for upsetting her, especially now that she was pregnant.

But our life together was just for the two of us back in New York. I didn’t want to taint any of that with this or them.-Yeah. I think it’s time, as much as I don’t want it to be. I get the feeling that if we don’t go now we’re not ever going to so just remember I love you? Ok?

-I leaned in and stole another kiss, this one from her lips. I didn’t want to go in, but we were going to have to sooner or later.-

Cay: ^I let out a loud groan. This was the last moment where I could act like a petulant child. At least until we were alone. Any other time, I had to play the role of loving girlfriend. You couldn’t claim that I wasn’t a loving girlfriend. This just wasn’t the roles we normally played in our relationship. And part of me was worried about how this weekend was going to affect those roles.

It also helped that I had something planned for when Daddy and I got back to New York. It was something I think we were going to need after the weekend. And it was something that reminded me of the last time he had completely let loose. It made me smile to know I had Nightingale working on that little project with the help of Sir.

But I sat in the car as Daddy climbed out. I knew the truth about this trip. Not only did he have to play the perfect son, he also needed to be the perfect gentleman. I wasn’t going to be opening doors or sitting on my own. Everything had to be done with the help of Daddy. Any deviation was going to result in a red bottom. And that was a promise from both Daddy and Sir.

As soon as Daddy was around my side, I couldn’t stop from sliding out of the car and pressing my lips against his. I wasn’t sure how his family was going to feel about open affection. It was something I craved from my Daddy on a regular basis. I needed it like I needed air to breathe. And there was nothing I wanted more right now than to just feel his lips on mine.^

Emily: *I knew my brother was here. I’d recognized his car when it pulled up the drive, and there was nothing about this weekend I was excited about except the chance to see him and meet his fiancée. She was all he’d talked about when I got a chance to phone him. I hadn’t been able to do that enough since this semester started. Everything was piling up on me until I felt like I was drowning, but I had only a month left to go. Four more weeks. I could do that. I’d gotten so far already.

I couldn’t help but peek out the window at the two of them. I know he’d think it was Mother, but I couldn’t help myself. I couldn’t make our much, other than the fact that she had gorgeous red hair and was wearing plaid, but I had to admit I was a little jealous he’d found his person. I’d never begrudge my brother any happiness, though. He was the best of all of us, which was why my parents gave him their worst, but he came through it all in the most gentle way possible. If it were possible, all their trying to turn him into one of them made him even more patient and caring and gentle than he had been before. He deserved a whole hell of a lot better than the Baines.

I was just waiting for the two of them to get out of the car before I went rushing out the front door. I didn’t want to interrupt anything between the two of them. The minute they were out the car, I was on my feet and out into the front yard to throw my arms around him*

Teddy! *I’d given him that nickname when we were children, and he’d let me curl up in his bed when the summer thunderstorms scared me. Everyone else in the house would just call me a baby and chase me off to my own room, but he took care of me even when he was just a kid himself.

Turning to grin at the young woman with him before I pounced on her with a hug* You must be Cay, and before you even open your mouth, you’re gorgeous, and I’m kind of jealous of my brother here.

*I’d babbled before I’d though, even though it was just Myrick and Cay. I had to get my head on straight before I had to go back in and deal with Mother, but I’d been away at school too long and didn’t have my game face on.*

Myrick: -It was a relief that the first person out of the house was Em, and when she threw her arms around me in a hug, it was the best greeting that I could have expected here. The fact that she pulled Cay into a hug without hesitation meant a lot as well. At least the first of my relatives she would get to speak to would be the one who was actually going to care about the both of us-

Hi there, Emmy. I told her you were going to love her as soon as you saw her. She’s been terrified since we left home. It’s the rest of them that are questionable. How are they?

-That question might have seemed innocuous to anyone who was listening, but it was code between the two of us. It was our way of using the other to take the temperature of the family before we walked into the thick of things-

Emily: *I loved Cay’s hair, and I wasn’t going to be able to stop myself from twirling one of the long locks around my finger as I stood next to her. I was going to like her very much. It helped worlds that she made my brother happier than I’d ever seen him, and she was cute as a button. I knew that before she ever opened her mouth.* Oh, Mother’s on the warpath about throwing me a graduation party. I’m trying to avoid it if at all possible because it just means she’s going to try to foist off every eligible bachelor on Hartford on me now that I’m done with my education and can get a serious man and a diamond ring and a border collie and a house with a mortgage and all of that nonsense. I’m far too concerned with not doing any of that to let her try.

*I wasn’t about to admit the reasons why I wasn’t down for all of that yet. I was hoping that she’d at least let me live out my life like some old spinster aunt since Bradley was married with kids and Myrick was engaged with one on the way, but no such luck.*

Cay: ^Emily was a lot to take in. But I couldn’t help the small giggle that slipped out as she started to play with my hair. I couldn’t stop the words before they were out of my mouth.^ Daddy does that when we’re laying in bed at night. I’m very used to having someone’s hands in my hair. And if it’s not Daddy, it’s Cassidy or Lindsay. Sometimes even Mr. Francis.

^I could see the raised brow that Daddy was giving me. A lot had just come tumbling from my lips, and I wasn’t entirely sure how much was too much. But maybe that was why Daddy thought I was going to get along so well with Emily. We were very much the same when a lot was going through our minds.

And right now, all I could think about was impressing the Baines family. Although I knew I had made an impression on Daddy’s little sister. The comment she had made about me made me think there was more to her story than she was letting on. But I wanted her to feel comfortable around me. I wanted her to know that I didn’t see her like I feared the rest of them. I wanted her to be on the same playing field as Daddy.^

Daddy tells me I’m gorgeous all the time. So does Nightingale and her Sir. I don’t necessarily see it, but I can appreciate it when it comes from a Baines. It makes me think you mean it more.

Emily: -She was pretty much as sweet as she’d seemed on the surface, but I could tell she had a sassy streak in her too. I liked it. I liked her. She was good for my brother, and she made him happy. That automatically made her better than anyone else who was going to be at this little family function. I slid an arm around her waist. I hoped the two of us would become good friends, but either way I was going to protect her from what she was about to walk into. I’d protect both of them as much as I could.- Well, we may as well walk into the lion's den. They’ll be waiting. I’m not leaving her side unless you’re there, Teddy. Mother will try to tear her to shreds if she gets her alone.

*I shook my head, not wanting to think about how she’d tear both of us to shreds if she knew the truth about everything. I was good at lying, too good. It made me feel like a bad person sometimes. But sometimes it was a necessary evil.*

Myrick: -of course my sister had intuited what I was going to ask her long before we ever walked into the building, even before I opened my mouth to say anything about it. She was blunt about what my mother would do with Cay, but it was the thing I was afraid of happening- Just take care of my girl, Em. I’ll try to stick around until Father pulls some men’s club in the study nonsense. But I don’t plan on going anywhere unless they make me.

-I leaned over, pressing a kiss to the top of Cay’s head and pulled our bag up on my shoulder before threading my fingers between hers. The walk to the house was too short. I preferred it outside. It was the last place we could all still be ourselves before we had to put on those masks that being part of the Baines family required. I could feel the change in the air when I made it through the front door. It might have been because Mother was standing in the foyer. Maybe not. Maybe it was just the entire atmosphere of the house.-

Hello, Mother. -I tightened my grip on Cay’s hand- Glad to see you’re doing well. -Most Mother’s would have hugged their children or something. Mine stood there like some kind of diplomat waiting to be properly introduced. “I’m glad you’re home, Myrick. And who might this be?” Her always appraising gaze moved over to Cay who Emily just tugged in closer to her side.- Let me introduce my fiancée. This is Caoilainn Desmond.

Cay: ^I wasn’t sure how I felt about all of this. I didn’t like the description of a lion’s den. I also didn’t like the idea of being torn apart. And the only thing I could be thankful for was the fact that Emily had promised Daddy she would protect me. But as we walked in the house, I felt like I was suddenly starved of oxygen. And it felt at least ten degrees colder. I wasn’t sure why, but I didn’t like it.

I could only bow my head as Daddy introduced me to his mother. The formal title was not lost on me. Nor was is something I was unfamiliar with. It was the term we were required to use in the Desmond house. I felt myself become more sandwiched between the two youngest Baines children. Looking between the two of them, I turned my attention back to the woman that was standing in front of me.

She looked just like Emily. Maybe a little older. But I wasn’t sure if that was natural, or if there was money put into looking that way. If I had to guess, there was money invested in that look. And, in knowing Emily for three seconds, I knew that that was not a pleasant experience. Emily looked like she wanted to be anywhere but where we were.

But the woman was dressed in one of those dresses that women would wear in the 1950’s. She wanted her appearance to be welcoming, but I could see the calculations going on behind her eyes. She knew I was younger than Daddy. But it was a matter of how much younger I actually was. And I knew that she was worried. I knew I looked much younger than I actually was.^ Good evening, Mrs. Baines. It’s a pleasure to meet you. Thank you for welcoming me into your beautiful home.

Emily: *I could see Cay taking Mother in. She loved this whole June Cleaver look she had going on, but every time I looked at her I saw myself in thirty years. She looked good for her age, but we all knew there was a lot of money invested in her looks. She was father’s showpiece. She always had been, and she took that job seriously. In addition, she took her role as the family matriarch far too seriously. At least on the outside. On the inside, I wasn’t sure there was anyone who really knew what she was all about. There was something kind of sad about that. It was exactly what I didn’t want for my life, but I was headed right that way if I let it. Maybe not in the same way, but there was absolutely no one who knew everything about me. I didn’t want to end up that way.* She’s absolutely lovely, Mother. *I heard my voice slipping into that tone I saved for home that made me sound like I’d gone to all the etiquette classes that I actually had been to, but I kept her close to my side, hoping to reassure Cay that all of this was just a facade.*

Myrick: -Emily was always just more subdued whenever she walked into any room where one of our parents were. It was like she hit a light switch and then turned off the happy parts of her brain. I didn’t like it, and I wasn’t capable of it. But she used it as a coping mechanism. Mother bought into it hook line and sinker.

“It’s a pleasure to meet you as well, Miss Desmond. And yes she is quite a lovely young woman.”

I could hear the emphasis she put on young. Cay was nineteen but she could have passed for either younger or older depending on her mood and how she dressed. I didn’t care what other people thought of her or the age difference we had going on at the moment. There were a lot bigger ones at play in the world we’d come from. She was just going to be concerned that Cay was even younger than she actually was and that she’d have some kind of scandal on her hands, which would be the only concern she’d have about all of this. I could have pretty easily blurted out how old Cay was, but if my patience was already wearing thin, it didn’t bode well for the rest of the weekend. Besides, I didn’t want to put her on the spot like that. It wasn’t fair to her, and Mother was going to do a good enough job of that on her own.

“I’m sure you’re both tired from your drive. Let me have the maid show you to your rooms.”

She gestured to one of the household staff that had been standing nearby, waiting to take us upstairs. I caught the word rooms, and I was certain she had plotted out having us in separate rooms during our time here. I wasn’t having that happen. I lived with Cay. We shared a bed there. We were getting married and having a son together. We weren’t sleeping in separate rooms just so my mother could keep up appearances.-

Well, I’m sure she’ll be more comfortable in my room as long as you haven’t replaced the bed in there with a bunk bed, Mother. There’s plenty of room for the two of us in there. We’ve slept in smaller spaces together.

-I knew that last statement was going to scandalize her more than a little. Maybe I was enjoying pushing her buttons a little, even if I didn’t really like confrontation.-

Cay: ^I didn’t want to cause more problems than I already was. And that was evident by the tension in the room. And it just seemed to get worse when Mrs Baines commented on my age. And then Daddy had to strike back against her with us sleeping in the same room.

I had to admit, I didn’t want to be in a different room. I mean, what was the worst that could happen? I could get pregnant? The rounding of my stomach told me that that was not an option right now since I was already pregnant. But I didn’t want to antagonize her. Gently tugging on Daddy’s sleeve, I shot him a look with a raised brow.^

What Noah means to say is that we wouldn’t want to inconvenience you with having to get a second room for me ready. Especially since I have nightmares when I’m sleeping in unfamiliar places.

^The nightmare bit wasn’t exactly the truth. I hadn’t had a nightmare since Daddy and I had moved into the condo. But I wasn’t going to risk it. I knew that Watson wasn’t going to be settled if he wasn’t close to his Daddy. But there was no way I was going to tell that to Mrs. Baines.^

Myrick: -Cay had a far more diplomatic way of putting things than I did. Maybe it was because I had little patience left for the way things were around the Baines household. I'd promised myself things would be different around my life back in New York than they were here. We were just here for a weekend. I kept telling myself that. And that Cay was here for me, but I wasn't going to sit by and let them pick at her even in the backhanded way that my family had.

Mother breathed in deeply and exhaled in a long breath that was half sigh.

“If you both insist, then of course you should sleep in Myrick’s room. Dinner is soon so I'm sure you'll both want to head upstairs and change clothes before your father, brother, and his family arrive. That includes you, Emily. I laid out a dress for you across your bed, something I picked out while I was in Boston. It's just your color.”

Turning her attention to Emily meant it was off of us for the moment, but it was just more of the same attempt to turn her into whatever it was that she wanted her daughter to be. In this case, it was to be dressed and look just like her mother. Em just nodded and made way for the stairs before causing and giving us both a smile-

Emily: *Of course Mother has picked out a dress for me tonight. The chances were pretty good that one of Bradley’s work friends would wind up popping in for dinner or drinks afterwards and she’d try to usher us off into some private corner to get to know one another. Besides Mother had atrocious taste in clothes as far as I was concerned, but my dinner attire wasn’t worth the argument.

I moved to head up the stairs, but paused at the bottom and turned to Cay with a genuine smile*

I’m looking forward to getting to know you a lot better. I always wanted a sister.

*I didn’t stop for Mother to protest that Bradley had a wife. I had about as much in common with Courtney as I did Mother. She was a wet paper bag, and happy with being purely decorative instead of smart or funny.

My suspicions were confirmed when I got upstairs and found a robins egg blue dress that even had crinoline under the skirt laid out across the bed in my childhood room. All I could do was pick it up and plop down on the bed with a soft sigh.*

Myrick: -I shouldered our bag again and bid a goodbye for now to another before I showed her up the stairs, assuring the maid she’d sent after us that I remembered the way to my childhood bedroom perfectly well. It was just good to get her inside and close the door behind us, dropping the bag onto the bed before I pulled her into my arms and stole a kiss. I hadn’t kissed her for maybe twenty minutes at most, but that had been far too long for me.-

I hope you know I love you, Baby Love. I’m already sorry for this entire house with the exception of Emily.

-I intended to keep her wrapped up in my arms for as long as I could before we needed to get ready to go down to dinner-

Cay: ^This was what I needed. I needed to just be in his arms. I needed to know that this was okay. All of it was okay. It was a reminder that none of this was how we were. This life was not a life we wanted. And it wasn’t something that we wanted for Watson. He had slowed his moving since we pulled up at the house. To me, it felt like he understood how much we didn’t want to be here.

And I really didn’t want his family to have anything to do with Watson. I already knew that they were going to corrupt him and try to make him like them. And it was something that Daddy and I were going to have to fight against. My voice was soft as I curled as close as I could get to my Daddy. We both needed this. We both needed to feel each other.^

Can we not tell them about his name? They won’t understand. They’ll mock it. ^I felt my voice drift into the snobbish tone his mother had when she commented on my age.^ Watson is not a suitable name for a child, Myrick. Especially not a Baines child. He should have something more appropriate.

^I rolled my eyes as my hands fell to my stomach. I wanted to protect the little one as much as I could and if keeping his name hidden from the world was what we had to do, then I was going to keep it between the two of us.^ Well, Emily can know. I have a feeling she won’t care that we named him after my lesbian bosses.

Myrick: -I laughed a little at the suggestion that Em wouldn’t care what we named our son as I ran my hand around the curve of Cay’s belly before kneeling down to press a kiss to it right where Watson’s favorite kicking spot was. I didn’t think my sister would care what we named him, but naming him after a lesbian couple who owned a kink club and a sex shop were probably going to land us on her list of most awesome things ever. She had a literal list. I’d seen it before.- They don’t need to know his name. He’s our son. They don’t need to have anything to do with him. I’m not going to let them screw him up. You have my word on that, Baby Love.

-I grinned up at my girl and stayed in my place on the floor watching him kick-

Both of you deserve better than all of this.

Cay: ^I could only let out a sigh as I looked at my Daddy on his knees in front of me. Of course he wanted to give Watson a little bit of attention. And I was fine with that. But I also knew that we needed to start getting dressed if we wanted to make a good appearance. I was already ready for the exhausting thing that was the Baines Family Dinner to be over.

I was already tired of calling Daddy Noah, and I had only said it once. I knew it was going to be something I was going to have to adjust to saying and fast. Once we were surrounded by people, I refused to let Daddy come out of my mouth. They didn’t have a say in our private lives. But I also wanted our life in New York to stay there. They didn’t need to know that I liked to curl up in Daddy’s lap like a little girl.

I also had the feeling that open affection was a huge no no. But it was absolutely something I craved from Daddy. I needed him to be touching me in some way, and I was terrified that when we were with his family, it was going to be something that was taken away. But I needed to not focus on that. I knew the truth. Daddy was going to touch me regardless of who was around. Especially if his son was pestering me.

I took a breath before pulling out the dress I had brought for dinner. It was something Cass had had made for me. Her rules were specifically for this weekend. Tonight in particular. Something about a test of how much Mr and Mrs Baines would say in front of the two of us. I hadn’t wanted to argue with her. The dress was very much my style, but still appropriate for dinner with the Baines Family.

It was that traditional 1950’s style dress, but the sugar skulls that covered the fabric was what was going to drive them insane. But there was room for my ever growing belly under it, so I knew that I was going to be comfortable. It was only a matter of minutes before I was out of my plaid dress and slipping into my pinup dress. It was a form of rebellion I needed, though. Because it wasn’t just for me. It was also for Daddy and Emmy, too.

The shoes were a little bit harder than just switching them. I had a small belly. It wasn’t big enough to cause too many problems. But I wasn’t really a fan of putting on shoes. But being where we were, I couldn’t walk around barefoot. I knew that. I had to be a good girl and wear shoes. And I knew how Daddy was. I knew what he liked. So the only shoes I could imagine bringing for this dress were a pair of platform plaid Mary Janes. Sitting on the edge of the bed, I slid my feet into the heels and waited for Daddy to get dressed so he could buckle them.^

Myrick: -I grinned as she held out her shoes for me to buckle for her. Shoes were getting to be more and more of a problem the bigger she got. The least I was going to be able to do for her was buckle her shoes. While she was getting on the dress that Cassie had made for her, I pulled on a pair of trousers and a button down shirt, fastening a tie into place, then a vest over that. Traditionally, I should have worn a jacket to dinner. That was the finishing touch I’d always been taught to add, but I was skipping it for the night.

There was a line I was drawing consciously with my decision of what to wear down to dinner. I knew what was expected, but I was going to do this my way. I hoped the message was going to get passed through what I was wearing, but I also knew my parents well enough to know that I was going to have to draw a much more firm line than that with them. It was something I was going to be sure to make known if they tried to interfere with my life with Cay or anything to do with Watson.

I buckled her shoes into place before leaning down to press a kiss to Cay’s forehead.- You look gorgeous, Baby Love. That dress is perfect for you.

-I lingered for a long moment before I offered her my arm to pull her up from sitting on the edge of the bed- Are you ready to head down to diner?

Cay: ^It took a second to get my bearings once I was on my feet. But I felt myself curl into Daddy’s side as we walked out of the room. I stared at the door just across the hall before giving Daddy a raised brow in question. He simply nodded his head before I let out a soft squeak.

My hand gently rapped against the wood door as I waited for Emmy to open it. And when she did, I felt my nose wrinkle a little bit. The blue dress she was wearing didn’t match the personality of the woman that had run out to the car earlier in the day. I almost wanted to beg her to go into my suitcase and steal one of the other dresses I had in there. I knew they wouldn’t fit, but I didn’t like the woman they were trying to make my Emmy be. They wanted her to be like them, and she was anything but.

Clearing my throat, I let my hands fall to the ruffle skirt before I looked back up at the woman standing in front of me. She had a smile on her face as she looked at me and Daddy. Holding my arm out to her, I let a wide smile cross my face.^ Miss Emmy Baines, I would be honored if you’d let me escort you down the stairs to the dinning room for dinner if you’ll let me.

Emily: *I wasn’t sure what to expect when I heard the knock on my door, but it hadn’t exactly been what had greeted me. Cay was dressed in the exact style dress my mother would have loved with a couple of exceptions. The print of the fabric was covered in swirls that melted into sugar skulls that stood out against the stark black background, and it was cut to perfectly show off all her tattoos. I thought they were beautiful, but I knew Mother’s thoughts on them quite well. I’d heard her rail on for hours of my life about how unsightly they were, and how unbecoming of a young woman to have them. To me they were art, plain and simple, and art that you could carry with you no matter where you went at that. I was proud of Teddy for letting go of all the the bullshit we’d been raised with and having the courage to just be who he was. That was a lot more than I could pull off at the moment.

I looked down at the ice blue dress I was wearing. I loved the color blue, but this shade wasn’t for me, and the way this was cut would have looked a lot better on anyone else. It didn’t even have pockets, and I hated dresses, unless they had pockets. Those were the only ones I could stomach on an average day, but I’d swallowed it down to slide this over my head back in my bedroom. It wasn’t a fight I wanted to have with Mother today.

On the other hand, I was absolutely delighted that Cay had walked over to my room and offered to escort me down the stairs. I couldn’t stifle the laugh that bubbled up unbidden when she asked, and I hoped she didn’t think I was laughing at her. I was just pleasantly surprised at the offer. I stepped into the hall, closing the door behind me and linked my arm through hers.*

I’d be honored, Miss Cay Desmond. *I grinned over at Myrick from where he stood behind the two of us in the hall. I hope you know your girl has a lot of spunk, and I kind of love her for it. Now, let’s get this show on the road before I change my mind and get on the next train back to New Haven.

*Maybe if I knew what was good for me, I wouldn’t have left New Haven, but my time was coming to a close there too. There was only so much pretending I could do before real life came and slapped me in the face. I just didn’t know how much longer I had left.*

Myrick: -Em looked miserable in that dress, but she was doing her best to put on a good face. By the time we started to go down the stairs together, I would have been mostly convinced she didn’t feel like a doll Mother had been playing dress up with if I didn’t know her better. The thing was, I was pretty sure that most of the people that were going to be waiting on us down in the dining room had no idea who she really was. She was good at hiding it from everyone, including herself from time to time. Cay, however, looked like she and that dress were made to go together, but she had her nerves written clearly across her expression.

The dining room was at the bottom of the stairs, and Mother and Father were both waiting there with Bradley and his wife. The kids were probably with their nanny back at Bradley’s home on the other side of town. He was shaping up to be another Mr. Baines, following in Father’s footsteps perfectly. He had the house, the wife, the job, the kids, and even the perfect dog. I hoped he was happy. That was really all I could say. I would have been miserable trying to be that person for this long. It hit me all of a sudden how lucky I was that Cay had wandered into the kitchen looking for tea and calling me Daddy out of the blue all those months ago. I wasn’t certain where I’d be without her, but I knew I wouldn’t have been half as happy with my life as I was right now. I had a fiancée, a baby on the way, a condo in Hell’s Kitchen, a job I loved, friends who loved me, and my own little world that had nothing to do with the people assembling in the foyer next to the dining room. I didn’t need to impress them, and the fact that Mother’s eyes were bulging out of her head at the sight of all of Cay’s tattoos was a source of amusement instead of fear or pain. She could gawk all she wanted, but in the end it didn’t really matter what she thought. I had my source of happiness outside of all of them.

And then I thought of Em. As far as I knew, she was alone in New Haven. She had been for quite some time. She’d never dated anyone seriously that I could remember. She’d been out a time or two with people Mother tried to set her up with, but those never worked out. Everything as far as romance went just sort of died on the vine with her, but maybe that was the way she liked it. She didn’t necessarily need someone to be happy, but it struck me that she was amazingly alone in this world. I knew who she was on the inside. She and I were close. We were friends, but she never talked about anyone else. She didn’t have friends at Yale. She didn’t even have a pet. She lived alone. She had to be lonely. I made a mental note to invite her to come see us in New York when she got done with this final semester, after all the pressure with school was off. Maybe she’d come look for a job somewhere closer to there when all was said and done. It would do her some good to get away from everything here that they tried to put on her, and it would do her a world of good to meet some people she could be more herself around.

My thoughts were interrupted by Bradley clearing his throat to stifle a laugh

“Evening, Myrick, Emily, and you must be Miss Desmond.” I wanted to knock the smug grin off his face, but I just shot him a look and made sure the two women in front of me got down the stairs in their heels without going head over heels.-

Evening, Bradley, and it’s always lovely to see you Courtney. -I shot her a warm smile, and she gave me a quick greeting. She didn’t speak much. I could see why Bradley had married her. She was happy to let him do all the talking if she could manage it, and he spoke enough for the two of them. Mostly I was distracted by the smarmy look on Bradley’s face, and hoped reminding him his wife was standing right next to him would get him to take his eyes off my fiance. I knew people looked at her. She was beautiful. I couldn’t blame them for that, but the expression he wore was something else entirely. I wasn’t normally confrontational, but at the moment, he had my blood boiling.

My father held out his hand. It was the first time I’d been home in well over a year, and the warmest greeting he could muster was a handshake.

“Always good to see you, Son.” I knew that was a lie, but it was one of the pleasantries we exchanged out of obligation. -

Happy Birthday, Sir. -I took his handshake and willingly overlooked the fact that both he and Mother were eying my lack of dinner jacket with a raised eyebrow-

Cay: ^I wanted to shrink back as Bradley eyed me up. It felt like he was sizing me up for an affair. It wasn’t going to happen. The Baines family may have thought I was trash, but Daddy was the exception. I let my hand gently rub at my stomach while greetings were being made. I could feel the way Emmy’s eyes were rolling even if they hadn’t moved. She knew what they were doing. As did I. And I wanted to bring attention to the fact that I was very pregnant and very much in love with Daddy.

But I felt myself choke on air as Daddy said the word Sir. All attention was on me as I brought my hand up to my mouth, the emerald heart in my claddagh shimmering for everyone to see. Daddy raised a brow, silently asking if I was okay.^ You know what caused it, Noah. Let’s just move on, okay?

^I didn’t address Bradley as his eyes wandered back to my stomach. I could only roll my eyes again before Mrs Baines addressed the topic of my ring. “Myrick? Why couldn’t you have gotten her a diamond? You know you should always use a diamond for an engagement ring.” I felt my eyes start to water as I took a breath. I knew this was going to be a source of contention with her. And those that weren’t Irish didn’t understand what this ring meant.^

To be fair, Mrs Baines, I’ve never been too fond of diamonds. And Noah knows what this type of ring means to me. It was important to me to have this ring, even if it wasn’t something Noah knew at the time.

Myrick: -Of course Mother was chastising me about the ring, even as she showed us into the dining room where one of the household help was just finishing up with setting the table. The same young woman would be back as soon as we were seated with the first course. Most of them acted as if she were invisible, but I noticed Em nod and whisper a soft thank you where Mother couldn’t hear when she passed the girl who was about the same age as her on the way to her seat. We all had assigned seats with our name on tiny placards set behind the plates.

And Mother had placed Cay and I directly across the table from each other instead of side by side. I groaned internally, wishing I could just snatch up Courtney’s name card and replace it with mine, but at least, Emmy was to her right. I could trust my sister to take care of her if I wasn’t going to be right at her side, at least.

I shot her an apologetic glance as I made my way over to pull her chair out for her to settle into before I made my way around to my own seat opposite her.-

Emily: *I noticed what Mother had done right away. She’d sandwiched Cay between two Baines and left poor Teddy on the other side beside Bradley. There was an empty chair on his left, though, and it was set with a plate. I looked over at her with a raised eyebrow as I reached under the table and surreptitiously linked my pinky finger with Cay’s under the table. If Myrick couldn’t be here next to her, I was at least going to do my best to make sure she was comfortable as possible despite all the scrutiny we were about to find ourselves under.*

So, Mother are we expecting someone else? *I glanced over at the empty chair. The place card was turned around so that I couldn’t see the name on it, but the sight of it made my heart sink into my stomach. I knew the answer to this question before she even opened her mouth. Someone was coming, and that someone was going to be my responsibility to entertain. I should have known something was up the minute she told me she’d bought me a new dress that was sitting up on my bed.

“One of the new junior associates at your father’s firm said he might stop by and join us for dinner. He’s just graduated from Harvard, top of his class. I thought the two of you would get on splendidly.”

She had that fake cheerful tone to her voice that always reminded me of the sugar they used to spike children’s medicine with to mask the bitter flavor. I fought off the urge to just scream right out loud and leave the table-

Oh.

*It was the only sentence I could really manage at the moment without saying more than I ever intended so say. I didn’t know how many failed set ups it was going to take before she left me alone, but it looked like it was going to be at least one more.*

Cay: ^I could only raise a brow before turning my head towards Emmy. I gave her a knowing smile before I asked the question that was on her mind. I made sure my voice was soft so that she was the only one that heard what I was about to say.^ Yeah, but at what cost did this setup happen? A few blowjobs from your brother behind closed doors?

^The resulting snort was all I needed to hear before Mrs Baines was asking what I said said to Emily. Clearing my throat, I gave Daddy an apologetic smile before turning back to Mrs Baines.^ I was simply asking Emily if she, as a Eli, was allowed to date a Cantabridgian. I always thought that was something that was frowned upon when you went to Yale.

^I let my pinky curl around Emily’s before I brought her hand to my knee. I knew as soon as she started tracing the butterfly that she was grateful. I was as much of a buffer for her as she was for me.^ Forgive me. I’m not accustomed to the whole Harvard versus Yale Topic. I just wanted clarification before she did something her classmates would harass her for.

Emily: *I kind of hoped Teddy wasn’t going to kill me for tracing the outlines of his girl’s tattoos, but it was just kind of nice knowing that at least someone here was on my side. I hadn’t been able to stop myself when she’d made that joke about Bradley. Half of me kind of hoped it was true, but Bradley would have to pull the stick out of his ass before any real sexual favors could have taken place. I wasn’t going to say that out loud in the same room as Mother and Father, though.

The irony of what Cay was using as an excuse wasn’t lost on me. I probably would have gotten shit from my classmates for dating someone from Harvard. The rivalry between the schools was real enough on some level, but it wouldn’t have been anything serious. I wasn’t close enough friends with any of them anyway for it to really matter. The last person I had been close to had been the last girl I was dating. She’d broken up with me because I was still hiding from everyone, too scared to even go on a real date with a girl because I wasn’t sure what kind of stories were going to get back to my family. It was just that I was going to get a lot less shit from my classmates about dating someone from Harvard than I ever would have gotten from my family for dating another woman. It was just that one of those things was infinitely preferable to me than the other.

Mother was stammering on in the background of my thoughts about how she’d never in her life heard of that, and trying to confirm with my father who assured her that there was a history of friction between the schools and that maybe she ought to wait until graduation to try to turn me into a traitor to my school. My thoughts were swimming and I could feel this buzz in my head that I got before I always did something impetuous. My hands were shaking a little, even though Cay was keeping her little finger linked around mine and my index finger kept up it’s pattern on her leg. My own leg was jumping under the table, and something in me snapped when I heard Mother’s voice again.

“Well, I just thought that I’d see that she had some company. She’s not getting any younger, Charles. And I haven’t seen her on a real date since the senior prom in high school.”

I took a deep breath and pushed myself up from my seat, dropping Cay’s hand as I did so, but only so that I didn’t jerk her arm when I wheeled around on my mother.*

Well maybe that’s because I’m a lesbian, Charlotte? Did you ever think of that? I guess not. You’re too busy already planning my wedding to whichever of Father’s business cronies you can pawn me off on first.

*My father opened his mouth as if to say something, but could only manage to gasp for air like a fish left out on the shore. Mother went straight to clutching her pearls, like I knew she would for the moment before she had a meltdown.

“If you think for one moment you can speak to your father and I like that in our own home you have another thing coming, Emily Sierra Baines. And as for the rest of this foolishness, I’m not entirely certain what kind of game you think you’re playing at, but this isn’t funny.”

That was all I needed. She was trying to give me a chance to say it was all a joke and take it back. Things could end right then and there, and we could all go back to pretending we were the picture perfect family that she’d been cultivating since she was my age. But that wasn’t going to happen. I was done with the charade. If Myrick was going to be able to sit over there and be happy with his life and his choices then so was I. Bradley could go jump off the roof of the law firm for all I gave a damn right now, and he could take his mistress and his wife with him.*

It’s not a joke or a game. It’s the honest to god truth, and I should have said it a long damned time ago. I should have screamed it from the rooftops when I figured out I had a crush on Jenny Maguire who sat next to me in Art my freshman year of high school. Instead, I’ve just been praying you’d let me hide in peace, but there’s nothing like peace in this house. Just a bunch of miserable human beings trying to make everyone else around them just as miserable as they are. I’m done with it. I hope Teddy is done with it too, because I’ll be damned if either of these two deserve you. They deserve a whole world better, and I’m glad he got out of this place. It was the best damned decision he ever made.

*I was in a real mood all of a sudden. I couldn’t remember feeling this rebellious ever in my life, but it felt good. I half expected Mother to have a fainting spell and fall into the soup tureen that the maid was bringing out of the kitchen just about the same time I decided to make my little announcement. Instead, she glared at me, knitting her too thin fingers together and pursing her lips so hard I could see the wrinkles she tried to hide around them.

“Get out of my house, and don’t ever come back.”

Ten little words, and it was done. All it took was one toe out of line, one kink in the entire Baines family tree and they cut off the branch before it could infect the rest. Right… I should have figured that. I just nodded and laid my napkin across the plate in front of me, looking around the table to all of the rest of the assembled company who were too stunned silent to speak.*

Well Cay, it’s been lovely to meet you. I’m sorry it couldn’t have ended under better circumstances, but if you’ll all excuse me…

Cay: ^I knew my next move was going to get both me and Daddy in a world of shit. But I couldn’t let them hurt her this way. She was Daddy’s Baby sister. She was the only person that meant as much to him as I did. And if doing what I was about to do earned Daddy the same treatment, I was okay with that. I just wanted Emmy to know that she didn’t have to go through this alone. And it wasn't the end of the weekend.

I didn’t hesitate as I bolted up from my chair. It took two strides after I was out of my chair to catch her, my hand hand wrapped around Emmy’s wrist to keep her from taking another step. I didn’t think as I let my hands slip behind her neck before I brought her lips down to mine.

I could feel how startled Emmy was as I started moving my lips against hers. And it took no time for her to react. Her arms wrapped around my waist as she pulled me just a little bit closer. Pulling away from her, I turned to Daddy with a grin.^ Daddy? Can you gather our stuff while I help Emmy pack. I’m pretty sure she could use a weekend in New York with us and Lia and Cassi. What do you say?

Myrick: -I wasn’t surprised by Cay’s next move, at least not nearly as surprised as I had been by Emily’s announcement. I couldn’t believe that she’d snapped and just let all of that out at dinner, but I was proud of her for standing up to them. It was something that both of us should have done a long time ago. I just shook my head and laughed at the commotion that started as soon as Cay pulled Emily in for a kiss, though I couldn’t resist the opportunity to ‘accidentally’ kick Bradley hard in the shin as I moved to stand. He was gawking at my fiancee a little to hard for my tastes.-

Put your tongue back in your mouth Bradley, or I’m going to have to tell your wife about the crap you got up to at your bachelor party. You do have a clause in the prenup about infidelity right?

-I rolled my eyes and left the room in the state of disorder that Emily and Cay had put it into along with a little help from me and met the two young women at the exit to the foyer.-

Don’t even worry about changing clothes.

-I paused for a moment, remembering how uncomfortable my sister had looked in that dress.-

Never mind, go ahead and change clothes. Maybe toss that thing in the fireplace on the way out, but I’m getting the two of you out of here and back to the city before Mother’s head goes into a full on nuclear meltdown. I don’t want to be in the county when she finally explodes.

-I let the two of them go up ahead of me, cutting to the left when we reached the top of the stairs while the two of them went right into my sister’s bedroom. I was going to make quick work of the packing because I didn’t want to be in this house a minute longer than I needed to. Something told me they both felt the same way.-

Emily: *I’d been in an absolute daze when Cay stood up and grabbed my wrist. I had no idea what was coming next, but when she pulled me in to plant a kiss against my lips, I just went with it. I hoped that hadn’t hurt Myrick’s feelings, but he looked alright enough when he’d ushered the two of us up the stairs. I didn’t even pause for a breath before I ripped the dress Mother had left me off and grabbed a pair of jeans and a t-shirt out of the suitcase I’d left open on my bed. I hadn’t even bothered to unpack when I’d gotten here, so that was at least a mercy. I just had to get on my clothes and toss a couple of things I wasn’t going to leave behind in my room into my bag. The rest could stay. This room didn’t hold too many happy memories for me anyway. I wasn’t going to miss it.

I glanced at Cay as I pulled on the shirt over my head and tossed my shoes into the open bag on the bed*

Just please tell me that Teddy isn’t going to be mad that you kissed me. I don’t know if I could take it if he was mad at me too…

*It kind of hit me that Myrick was all the family I had left in the world, and the last thing I ever wanted to do was upset him.*

Cay: ^I could only let out a giggle as Emmy worried about how Daddy would react to all of this. And I knew the truth. It didn’t matter to him. For all of the insecurities, he knew that I was his and he was mine. Even if the full scope of my sexuality hadn’t yet come up between the two of us, there wasn’t anything I would do to risk my relationship with him. Clearing my throat, I put my hands behind my back and gave Emmy a small smile.^

I mean, Daddy’s seen me suck another man’s cock while he had sex with another woman not even four feet away. And that was after he had asked me to marry him.

^I shrugged my shoulders as I looked at the woman in front of me. She was terrified. It wasn’t because she had nowhere to go, it was because she didn’t know what Daddy’s reaction was going to be about what had happened.^

He’s proud of you for standing up for yourself. He may be surprised at what I did, but it’s not something he’d get mad over. Not when him and I have a relationship with another couple back in New York. If Sir and Nightingale aren’t busy, you can meet them. Along with my bosses, Mellie and Cassidy. They’re my family. And I have a feeling Mellie and Cassidy are going to love you.

^Taking Emmy’s free hand, I pulled her into the hall where Daddy was waiting. Stealing a kiss from his lips, I gave him a smile.^ Tell Emmy you’ve seen me do worse things to Sir. She’s freaking out about me kissing her.

Myrick: -I’d been pulling our bag out into the hall only to be met with my Baby Love and my barefoot little sister out in the hallway looking sheepish. I had no idea what Cay had told her just now, but it didn’t really matter. I trusted Em as much as I trusted Cay. There wasn’t anything I couldn’t tell her. I just hadn’t brought up all the details because I didn’t want to make her uncomfortable. It clearly wasn’t going to be a problem though if the biggest thing that she was worried about after all of this was me being upset with her.-

I’ve seen a heck of a lot worse than that, Em. I promise. You’re fine.

-I leaned down and pressed a kiss to the top of Cay’s head, pulling her into my side and grinned over at my sister.-

Now get some shoes on and come on. We’re going to blow this popsicle stand once and for all.

Emily: *I didn’t have to be told twice. I practically ran into my room, grabbed the Cons I’d kicked off before dinner and pulled them on before zipping up my bag and joining the two of them in the hall. I hadn’t planned to head into New York for the weekend, but I didn’t have anything as far as classes were concerned until Monday afternoon, so I had the luxury of being able to take the morning train back into New Haven. Besides, It seemed like I had a lot of my brother’s life to catch up on. He’d built a whole world there that didn’t involve any of the Baines or their bullshit. I had to admit I was curious to find out more about them all.

Of course it was Myrick who’d kicked all the stereotypes and wound up doing something alternative. It made sense. Maybe not if you didn’t know him. If you’d just met him, he was quiet and kind of reserved. He seemed like he’d come from money, but not in a bad way. But when you really knew him, you kind of understood that he didn’t like to fit in anyone’s mold, even if he wasn’t vocal about it. I liked that about him. I had the same streak in myself, even if I was better at hiding it, well I had been better until tonight.

I hadn’t known what came over me, but now that it was done, it was like a breath of fresh air to bounce down the front stairs behind those two and hold up both middle fingers pointed at the dining room before I walked out the front door into the cool evening air. It smelled like freedom for the first time in years.*

#WaistDeepInThoughts

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firedupandtired · 6 years

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Waist Deep in Thoughts (SL with @DayDividesNight and @SinfulMyrick)