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carriepaws · 6 years

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TodoDeku AU #001

Strangers meeting inside a movie theater.

Izuku was confused at what he just did. Before he could even change his mind, the lady had already handed him his movie ticket and there was no way he could back down now. He unknowingly stared at the title printed in bold —I love you, you’re just too dumb to realize but my feelings won't ever change— and even though he wasn’t too dumb to realize that it was without a doubt the longest and cheesiest movie title he had ever seen, he felt stupid for trusting Tsuyu and Ochako’s words that the movie was the bomb of the year. He really wasn’t into romance flicks but he guessed it wouldn’t hurt to try.

Also, who knew? Maybe they were right and he was simply judging the movie by its title. Perhaps it was safe to at least give this movie a chance. After all, he needed to get his mind off things like his huge fight with Kacchan, and this was a great distraction. Hopefully. He was supposed to invite his best friend to go see this movie together but Kacchan got mad at him for reasons he didn’t even know. But really, what a very typical Kacchan thing to do. Kacchan was Kacchan and even though he had flaws, he was a great friend and Izuku loved him for all that he was. So after the movie, he decided to look for something he could give to him as a token of apology.

Back to our bomb movie of the year. For something that was, ahem, worth seeing, he was quite surprised to see that the theater was-

“Empty,” Izuku managed to say just above a whisper.

But since it was too silent, he could hear his voice loud and clear, and suddenly he felt a chill ran down his whole body. It wasn’t like he was going to watch a horror movie, why was he being panicky? Who cared if it was just him inside the huge, dark movie theater for two hours?

“Damn. I do care. I know this is the first time I’m doing this thing alone but… Now I’m… Tss. To think I’d literally be alone,” he sighed as he walked down the aisle and chose to sit in the fourth row, right in the middle.

“Okay. Let’s hope this one’s good.”

The opening credits rolled in and several minutes have passed and-

He hated the movie.

He wasn’t going to blame his friends because they probably have different taste in cinema but…

He hated the movie.

30 minutes and nothing exciting was happening. It was the right theater, wasn’t it? The movie wasn’t even cheesy. It was just dull and bland and anti-climactic. He didn’t mind slow-paced stories but this took the cake. It was… How should he put it. It was one of the worst decisions he had ever made. He should learn to watch trailers before diving right into any unheard titles but where’s the fun in that? were his friends’ exact words.

What was fun?

Where was it?

It was anything but this.

Izuku could feel his lids getting heavier and heavier until he thought he heard something but he was too far gone to even care. And just like that, wasted money be damned but he couldn’t take it anymore, the back of his head hit the back seat and then everything went black.

He was startled awake by something cold touching his left cheek and a deep yet soft voice talking to him.

“Hey…”

“Hmmm…”

“Movie’s over.”

“Mmm, thank fuck it is,” he grunted, eyes still closed.

Okay, now. Izuku didn’t usually swear but he was blaming his dazed state of mind. Or the movie. Of course, the movie was definitely the one to blame here. He could hear a low, delicious chuckle and a soft vibration on his right cheek.

Wait- Did he just think delicious?

Also wait, soft vibration?

Izuku’s eyes fluttered open to see the movie screen had already faded to black and that he was possibly lying on the shoulder of a stranger. He reluctantly twisted his head up to see who was kind enough not to wake him in his dreamless sleep. Lo and behold, he found himself staring at the most beautiful heterochromatic eyes he had ever laid his eyes on.

“A cat?” He muttered absentmindedly.

The kind stranger snorted, obviously trying not to laugh at what he just blurted out.

“I’m not a cat. You better wake up now, sleeping beauty. The attendant will be here any minute now and they’ll kick us out,” Mr. Stranger said with his gentle, velvety voice. His hand softly caressing his cheek.

It took him a good few seconds before everything sunk in and that he wasn’t dreaming about talking to a gorgeous cat with heterochromatic eyes. He swiftly removed his head from the stranger’s shoulder as he felt his face getting hot and flushed red.

“I’m sorry! I-I was… I d-didn’t mean to… I’m, I’m really sorry!”

Izuku was using his most apologetic face and voice while bowing repeatedly in front of the man. Damn, he was so embarrassed he felt like if the ground ate him right at the moment, he wouldn’t be shocked and sorry for himself but thankful as eff instead.

“That’s okay. I don’t mind. I was bored in the middle of the movie as well. I was two rows behind you and I noticed your head fell hard against the armrest. I felt the need to at least check if you were okay. Thankfully, you didn’t hurt yourself or scratched your head. I kinda helped you to a more proper sitting position and I was about to go back to my seat but you suddenly grabbed me and wouldn’t let go. Man, you have a vice grip for a kid.”

“Now I feel more sorry for- Wait a second there. A kid? You said I was a kid?! I’m not a kid! I’m already a university student and I get good grades, thank you very much,” he argued with his arms crossed.

Mr. Stranger was kind, yes but was he being savage in a subtle way?

He was sure he wasn’t acting like an adult, if that’s what he wanted to prove, seeing that he was pouting like a butt-hurt kid but he had every right to be a bit mad, right? Even a stranger had the nerve to make fun of him. Poor Izuku. But then he saw the soft smile on his face. He was clearly not making fun of him to annoy him. He was probably trying to make light of the situation and erase the awkwardness.

“Thank you. And… I’m sorry for shouting at you and for being a bother. But yeah, thank you for… what you did. You could have just ignored me but you didn’t,” Izuku relaxed and gave him an abashed smile.

“You’re welcome and I don’t blame you for falling asleep. The movie sucks.”

“Ha! Damn right, it does. I should have watched All Might 2 again instead of wasting some cash over some trash.”

“All Might’s cool. I’d rather re-watch that, too. I just watched this because a friend gave me a free ticket.”

Izuku moved to a more comfortable position. The man was maybe the same his age but taller. Tch. He still didn’t have the right to make fun of his height, okay? But since he’s gorgeous and that Izuku wasn’t even going to question why his hair was split into half-white and half-red because holy shit, it fitted him perfectly. And he's also an All Might fan!

He's almost perfect.

“You’re staring.”

Even his lips were luscious and that scar just made him cool and manly and-

He was caught.

Shit.

Quick! Make an excuse.

“AH! I was thinking that maybe I should... repay you? Uh…”

“You don’t have to.”

“I really want to,” Izuku answered firmly.

“If you insist we could-”

“Watch All Might 2 together?”

“I was thinking coffee since it’s pretty late but we can do both. How about coffee tonight and All Might 2 this Saturday?”

Izuku couldn’t help but grin and nod his head.

“But before that, I really wanted to know your name ‘cause I don’t wanna keep calling you Mr. Stranger, you know.”

“Sounds fair. Todoroki Shouto, at your service, sleeping beauty,” he teasingly said as he stood up, bowed and offered Izuku his hand.

Izuku was about to get mad at him again but then he noticed the cinema attendant. He was definitely going to ask them to leave so he was left without a choice.

“I’m not sleeping beauty. My name’s Midoriya Izuku,” Izuku sighed but took his hand and couldn't help but smile regardless.

Todoroki-kun’s hand felt cold. He wasn’t sure if it was because of the low temperature of the almost vacant movie theater but despite that, he also felt warmth slowly spreading all over him. And he thought, it felt really nice.

The following day, Izuku didn’t forget to thank his good friends for being the sole reasons for a chance meeting he never thought would ever happen.

“Hey guys! By the way, I hated the movie but thank you!” Those were Izuku’s words as he greeted them inside the half-empty classroom. He sat with them and brought out his phone.

“Thought so,” Tsuyu muttered while Ochako giggled. And then…

“Wait, what?! You watched that movie?! Noooooo,” Ochako was so shocked that she abruptly stood up and almost knocked her desk.

“And look at that, you’re still thanking us. You are way too kind Midoriya-chan,” Tsuyu proudly said as she tried to pull Ochako to sit again.

“Oh my gosh, Deku. We were just messing around.”

“We didn’t think you’d take us seriously.”

“Yeah... I mean, that movie has a 4.5/10 rating on IMDb. AND THE TITLE. The title's a dead giveaway.”

“Whoa, that bad, huh? Kero.”

“Come on guys, it wasn’t bad. It was really, really, REALLY bad,” Izuku said with mirth in his voice as he typed something on his phone.

How could they believe him when he had that huge smile plastered on his face? What the hell happened yesterday?

“I don’t understand, Tsuyu. Did the movie break him or something?”

“That might be the case. Look at him, he’s too… pleased?”

“If I were him, I would be somehow pissed and not pleased. He’s too precious. Or, something really did happen.”

“Oh by the way, do you wanna watch All Might 2 this coming weekend?” Izuku asked them, eyes still glued to his phone, and fingers still busy typing away.

“We already watched it, Deku. Actually, we watched it all together. How are you doing, my friend? Are you even Deku?” Ochako and Tsuyu exchanged laughs all the while being completely baffled by their friend’s behavior.

“I’m going to watch it again with Todoroki-kun. If you guys wanna join us, then just send me a message.”

He wasn’t even listening to them anymore.

“Also, I’m kinda hungry so I’ll just grab some breakfast in the cafeteria. See you!”

And with that, Izuku put his phone in his pocket as he waved goodbye, leaving his completely bemused friends behind with that silly smile still gracing his face.

“Who the heck’s Todoroki-kun and what did he do to our friend?”

“He is the something really did happen, Ochako-chan.”

#tododeku #carrie learns to write #one shot #tododeku fanfic #todoroki shouto #midoriya izuku #uraraka ochako #asui tsuyu #tododeku one shot #boku no hero academia #my hero academia #alternate universe #fan fiction #tododeku strangers au #my fingers were bored i'm sorry?

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mum-for-da-sons · 5 years

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Very messy Delta review

Hey gang, i sat & typed & spiraled while listening to delta for the first time just now, so if that interests you to read barely legible thoughts, it’ll be under the read more thing. dang i’m sad!! BUt spoiler alert: GOOOD ALBUM! I’m SAD!! (do note I don’t find the album or many tracks all-around too sad, I’m just a depressed bih)

Delta thoughts: okay i’m not gonna really edit what i wrote but for everyone’s sanity i’ll bold the song titles, okay?

42: BINCH! See a sign, I need some guiding light,,, eff ME UP OKAY?? This is such a strong start i’m already getting teary-eyed, huh. Ugh, it’s so satisfying… well effing done lads,, well done

Guiding Light: Hot dang the whispered beginning?? I really need to fix my computer speakers because this sounds heavenly in my over-ear headphones,, gosh dang. Discover some new TRUTH! Gosh dang this is not a comprehensive review in the slightest but i don’t care!! Binch!! I can’t even say anything good… when beloved or darkness visible makes me cry, i guess beloved is fourth? So if it does it’ll be first, anyway, when i start crying maybe i have something cooler to say. Not crazy about the “dubstep build” on this, after the bridge, just because i don’t believe it, like it’s not long enough, and resolves unconvincingly. But, anyway.

Woman: literally FRICK i thought if i say was next this start is cool and very Winston. Oh vibes?? Oh worm?? Woman?? I’m like 15 seconds in and this is… yes. Can you ever really know? No. is ths song even about anything lol i don’t think i care?? Issa vibe, gang. Chorus?? Eff me up. He said frosty… wendy’s come collect. Oh that was the pre-chorus?? This is f*cking me up… VIBES. i ‘ve been waiting for them to try this in a song of theirs and not like a cover.. I knew they were capable…. The range they’re displaying rn? I love it. I love them wtf!! Oooh man i wanna see this live? There’s this drumstick noise, like rimshots? That sounds so satisfying. Yes, clackety clack. This is nice. Nice song. Don’t really know what they’re singing, bt this is warm. I like it. Mumford & sons finally said it’s 2018, huh. I just got a youtube notification of me commenting on their radio appearance and i literally said “the range they’re showing? Fantastic” and yanno what,, same

Beloved: this song started like right away huh. He said darling… dang he did that. He’s fitting a lot of words in on this one. Ohh the lord has a plan? It is hard to understand… i love these lyrics.. Big brain meme. Are you afraid? The attack.. Hand come through the mirror?? That visual!!! O f*ck me up. Before you leave :(( yeah it’s getting to me aHAHA.ohh this breakdown? Yes. these drums are especially nice. Ugh i really missed these guys wtf :(. AND AS YOU LEAVE, YOU MUST KNOW YOU ARE BELOVED> yes. Yes. as you LEeeeEEeaaveee. See my children playing at your feet?? BOI.. i’m so soft wtf.. They’re really putting it all out… i wanna hug them i’m so… this is so sweet aw. Oh no the song is fading, no don’t do that song

What song is this the piano can f*ck me up: ben man, you’re doin that huh. No literally did we have to jump to this painful… frick. This violin? Is nice. WE SAW BIRTH AND DEATH. Oh frick. They’re just going for it this is a lot i’m soft. Lemme actually see what song this is lol.. It’s The Wild. i have like chills & i can’t tell if it’s because i’m cold or not. Do not be afraid :(. OH they stripped it back!!! THIS IS NICE! Binch! Puts the fear of God in me :( this is so nice .. it’s hard to pick what to focus on. What’s that i see binch? I think it’s the wild… marcus is really do THAT with these vocals, huh. There was like a breath and.. The atmosphere during this part?? Nat Geo who??? Ohhh i like this so much.. It’s like a soundtrack.. The sampling of noise?? The background?? It’s cool, doesn’t specifically sound like them at all, but, aw these drums :( now it’s like a war movie.. This is so interesting. Those drums remind me of the drums in winter winds that i can sometimes here & it’s very drill-like and marching band-esqe and i love it. Aw birds??? You know what this reminds me of…. I won’t say

Next song: marcus is playing no games with these vocals, jesus. October Skies.. Isn’t this his favorite one… ooh ted I hear that bass,, eff it up.OooooOOOoooHH. The range… i love these guys. I’m blinded by the light of october skies… the movie with Jake Gylenhaal, and in the valley I am free :( where’d the silehute go? OOOooooOOOOooooHH YOUr’e esesjfsfshesal!! The fear of what’s to come.. CRIPlin’ me :( binch. Is this synth lowkey?? Brand it on my mind is such a great visual, like the “press my nose up to the glass around your heart” line.. Who wrote it. Oh is the sonG_ OOOOOOoooooOOOOOOoooooHHHH. Maggie rogers is that you? Hot dang

An upbeater!! Wipe those tears baby! Is this the just smoke of this album. This is.. Slip Away. “stoic smile” i see you… haha. Ooh this chorus is nice COME AND SUFFER HERE, LADIES! Mood!! Holding my breathe for you? F! In this violence of a mind’s eye… i like everything except maybe---- ohh this falsetto?? I’m.. i’m tearing.. Oooh we just found a song to cry to in the middle of the night, huh. It’s misleading with the beat vs. the lyrics.. I wouldn’t have it any other way!! Gosh i’m so depressed! Lol!! There’s a pulsing beat of some kind that’s nice.. Also some nice guitar work on here, some clackety things… go gently… be still…. Go gently….now… be still… Go Gentlyyyyy nowwwww, be stiiiilllll. Ugh they.. They’re doing this… i’m so proud of them wtf. Is this winston?? Who is singing.. Marcus?? I can’t.. Tell? No i think its marcus but we’ve truly never heard that high-end from him for that long

Okay: next song is pretty interesting- ooh! Right off the bat! This has to be the one they said sounded like ngalma? However you spell it… clap clap clap clap clap, this is a drum-machiner one for sure. I will be yours & you will be mine, ever our lives will be entwined binch! This noise after “my rose of sharon” is a mood. Ugh this is so cute.. Imagine being happy w/ someone else, what a concept ! eeeeeee yuh! That’s what they’re singing in the back.. My rose of sharon, my rose of sharon, BRR BRR BRN NER! Did the song-- what’s up with these abrupt endings

That being said, Picture You sounds v vibey right off the bat. Okay lads! I thought it best you didn’t knowww. I’m so proud of Marcus for flaunting these vocals, i stg, I’ve spoken on this before but... like he can do that!! I’m so glad he’s,, doing it! Ooh the “away” is v nice. I love full-stops in music, where the sound gets sucked out like here or just stops entirely… yes boys. Okay.. not crazy about this kind of.. Breakdown but it’s still cool. Just not in-rand as much as some other things. I mean, this sound is V different of course but they’re workin’ it. Okay i kind of stopped paying attention for a sec… there’s sampling… ohhh oh no it’s getting dark… hohoho no guys.. I’m excited but the anxiety is jumping out… holy smokes this is cool tho. It’s pretty. Hope that never comes, that comes to all.. Torture without end… yet from the great flames no light,,, but rather.. .DARKNESS VISIBLE. I’m gonna check if it didn’t seamlessly bleed into darkness visible…

Oh it did!! Their minds!! God, i already know i love darkness visible,, it was my pre-album listen fave on details about it alone,, we’re depressed sweeties let’s pop off… it’s so nice >:(. And just like that it ended!!!! BINCH!!! Ooh they’re like not even vocally in that one… i like that ish!! Not the “them not being in it” in that way but OOH! That was effing cool

If I Say: is still v v nice,, sounds effing expansive and beautiful with good headphones, i’m picking up all the lil details and prettiness.. The synth line after “if i say i love you, well then i love you” is sooo satisfying too. Ugh this orchestra,,, it’s building.. Truly their minds were so big on this album, huh. I’ll tell you what It doesn’t mean that i feel better! It doesn’t mean that I feel better! I’m, haha i still kinda hate this chorus but their so passionate i can’t hate it all the way,, like they love this ish and are into it & i love them so it’s allll good homies. I dig. I’ll be fake and wild out when they play it live, don’t worry. But peace you never find :( the guitar tone is crispyyyy,, the instrumentation… ugh it’s so nice. Violins can murder me or someat and I’d accept it. AND IF I SAY I LOVE YOU, THEN I LOVE YOUUUU. Ugh,, so so nice man

What’s NEXT: ooh some seamlessness in that transition.. .is this ghost of tom joad i’m hearing lol, mortal once again!! Oh this is a mood, freak.. Sigh no more marcus really jumped out on this one. This shuffling maraca thing is so nice. I’ll hold you by the jaw!! Hoo hoo bihhh. “It took a wild heart to tame mIIiine” this is so nice wtf!! Ugh this is so nice. I wouldn’t have you any other way,, awwwwwWWW!! Who want a love that makes sense anyway? I’ll effing say! Ugh this is very nice. These lyrics are so interesting… this is a good one guys, quiet & sweet but there’s some pretty cool things also going on, like it’s simple but its… this is it, ya know? This piano is sweet too. This whole thing is sweet, maybe that’s a dumb word to use but. This is so sweeeeet ugh!!! The vocal riffs on “mine” … ugh!! I kind of like the echoey vocals too.. Soft rain patter for two seconds at the end??

Reverse noises w/ a big breath from Marcus: let’s effing go w/ this album, gang!! What song is this reminding me of… whispers in the dark? He did some late-babel, early wilder mind voice thing.. Wait it’s forever isn’t it. I heard this one i think, like 3 yrs ago.. Yup, Dare I Say Forever.. I still don’t like do it for the girl” cos it’s too straightfoward, ,”i’ve known pious women” LOL where is this going. Only mumford & sons can really put that word in a song and just, keep singing. We stan tho, we stan. Think of london,,, we love. The DAAaaYS you defend will turn to gold,, this could easily be the last song on the album, this is like a last-call at the bar song,, in a good way, i’ve linked arms with my buddies & we’re all yelling this song like goons,, yes. Lighters a-waving,, are we too sentimental to not look back atnd!! WOW he realy did that with stare!! I couldnt finish typing that.. Is this part auto-tuned?? Dare I say.. Why? I’m choosing to hear it as a vocoder and many harmonies so i don’t hate that but uhaha they.. Hm they tried that i guess. Other than that the vi- oh why did the violin exit like that

The song is bouncing in my ears weird!! It’s giving me monster vibes atm. There’s a definite thread of messages goin thru this album & oof i love being sad,, the children come & go as you weep? Lol i love being sad. I am a waste?? My words are empty [as the bed we made]. Wilder mind is comin out on this, the album, huh!! The optimism on this album is-- I”LL MEET YOU OUT THE DELTAAA< WHERE THE RIVER”S RUINNING TO THE SEA,, GOD i love it. Ooh these drums, cool cool, it’s.. This is cool. Also sampling marcus’s children is sure way to eff everyone up, but that’s for another post,, ooooh i’m soft!! When it feels like nothing else matters :((((( lets go with this build!!! I wanna go for a run and have a cry.. Ooh man i took a moment there… this is so nice :( i’v missed them!!! Whats goin on with his vocals here,, the recording is like too close,, on purpose?? Hm. dust to dust!! I see you!! Marcus is truly giving his all here,, ugh I”m so proud of all of them, they put their LIVES on this, didn’t they!!! This song is such a feeling,, i can’t describe it i’m sad, but awwwW! I don’t kno wtf these kids are saying but wow that was cute as all heck!!! I”m so soft!! The album is over!! They did it!! Frick i don’t know how to feel!! Good really, but wow!!! Trying to not let my own sadness affect this review haha but !! what a nice body of work they produced!! In all the best ways, mostly!! I love them!! I wanna have another listen!! Aw!!!! Frick guys. Frick. Can’t imagine anyone wants to slog thru this and have a read but,, anyway thanks if you did i guess, special thanks to Mumford & Sons for being my favorite band and always :( always being there when I need it. I needed this. wow. wow. Wowww!!! Oof, haha i’m sad

Okay wait also he should’ve repeated the “I’ll meet you at the delta part” at least one more time but eff my criticism that song captures all stages of life and i truly wanna cry, so there’s that. Theses guys put it all out there & I really love them for that.

#mumford & sons #mumford and sons #oooof im sad!!#mumfamily #wow!#delta

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queennicoleinboots · 3 years

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Bears with Questions, Bears with Answers

A/N: Sequel to Bears In The Forest

Bruce the Ace of Brake-fixing was driving my van as though it were a racecar through the forest. We even flew through the air at some points of the drive. He was a mechanic, so he could fix whatever damage he was causing to the suspension.

"Father, I had no idea you were an Eff-Bee-Eye Agent. That's incredible!" Abigail Ace shouted.

"FEDERATION OF BEAR INVESTIGATORS! REMEMBER THAT, ABIGAIL ACE!," Bruce the Ace of Brake-fixing shouted as he pounded on the horn of my steering wheel and swerved through the trees. He stared straight ahead with green eyes that had fire for pupils.

"Will do, Father. How did you learn to drive like this?" Abigail Ace asked with sparkles in her eyes.

"A loooooot of practice," Bruce the Ace of Brake-fixing said as he flew over a tree stump.

"When did you start learning to drive?" Abigail Ace asked.

"When I was 8," Bruce the Ace of Brake-fixing said as he slammed the brakes and made the van swerve to the right as he barely missed the tree that he almost hit head on with my van.

"When you were 8!? Father, you didn't teach me to drive until I was 15," Abigail Ace said.

Bruce the Ace of Brake-fixing turned off the van and then looked at her. "Is that a problem?" He stared her down.

"No, sir. I was making a statement," Abigail Ace said.

Bruce the Ace of Brake-fixing continued to stare at her. "I don't WANT you to live the life that I have. I want something safer for you. I want you to live a life of peace, prosperity, and happiness. I have sacrificed my youth, my safety, and my ambitions for this family! I am NOT going to allow you to live the life that I have lived to COMPLETELY NULLIFY WHAT I HAVE GIVEN UP FOR YOU. DO YOU UNDERSTAND?!" He made sure to stare deep into her soul.

"Yessir," Abigail Ace said.

"You think my life is glorious because I have led the Secret American Society of Sexually-Frustrated Bears, the Extraordinary Youth League of Young Bears, and the Secret American Society of Sexually-Frustrated Goats and had been in the Federation of Bear Investigators? Well, I have news for you, Abigail Ace, IT'S NOT! It is too much stress even for ME! You have no understanding of what I have to go through on a daily basis to keep you and the rest of this family safe! I hope you never will. Yes, I want you to be a leader of society, but not in a way where you risk your life. That is truly something I will never bear. No father can STAND the thought of anything happening to his daughters. THAT IS WHY WE LEFT EARTH. IT IS NOT SAFE FOR YOU OR ANYONE TO LIVE." Bruce the Ace of Brake-fixing said as he continued to stare into Abigail Ace's soul.

Abigail Ace blinked twice and wasn't sure how to respond.

"Come on, family. We've had a big day. Let's get some rest," Bruce the Ace of Brake-fixing said as he handed me my keys and got out of the van. The other bears and I left the van after Bruce the Ace of Brake-fixing had spoken again.

Of course, going home and resting wasn't going to happen.

"Holy Shit, guys, are you okay? Holy Shit, guys, are you okay? Holy Shit, guys, are you okay? Holy Shit, guys, are you okay? Holy Shit, guys, are you okay? Holy Shit, guys, are you okay? Holy Shit, guys, are you okay? Holy Shit, guys, are you okay? Holy Shit, guys, are you okay?" Count Macula, Jr. asked as he rushed over to us with his soft brown eyes bursting through his glasses.

"Yes, we're okay, Count Macula, Jr.," I said.

"Yes, Count Maculoni and cheese, we're okay," Bruce the Ace of Brake-fixing said.

"Actually, food sounds very good right now. Actually, food sounds very good right now. Actually, food sounds very good right now. Actually, food sounds very good right now. Actually, food sounds very good right now. Actually, food sounds very good right now. Actually, food sounds very good right now. Actually, food sounds very good right now. Actually, food sounds very good right now. Who's cooking? Who's cooking? Who's cooking? Who's cooking? Who's cooking? Who's cooking? Who's cooking? Who's cooking? Who's cooking?" Count Macula, Jr. asked.

"I will cook dinner tonight. I will make a feast to celebrate our escape from Earth and our safe arrival to the Green Planet!" Megara Ace announced.

Bruce the Ace of Brake-fixing growled in pride and put an arm around her shoulders. "But of course because we are American bears, we must make an American dish," he said.

"Macaroni and cheese pizzas?" I asked.

"Absolutely!" Bruce the Ace of Brake-fixing said.

"Pizza is my favorite!" Abigail Ace shouted.

"Macaroni and cheese is my favorite!" Bruce Bananas shouted in excitement before he stopped himself, looked around, and grinned. "Sorry. I broke character there. Would anyone volunteer to beat my ass?"

"After dinner," Megara Ace said as she stared at him for a moment before she went to prepare the meal. Naturally, I went to assist her.

___________________________________________

"Macaroni and cheese pizza? Hmmmm... sounds delicious!" Joebear said as he was standing in the kitchen near me.

"Yes, Baewhuhh. I preheated the oven and started the water for the macaroni," I said as I began to make the crust using whole wheat flour (I wasn't in the mood to deal with brown rice flour and its finicky characteristics), water, eggs, butter, and yeast. I omitted salt and sugar because my bear couldn't have a large quantity of either one.

"I'm hungry again, and the other bears that arrived here must be famished," Joebear said.

"Yes they are," I said as I was making the pizza sauce. I used organic tomato sauce, organic tomato paste, organic basil, thyme, oregano, sage, rosemary, and red peppers from our garden, and a dash of honey for the pizza sauce.

I was letting the ingredients simmer as I perused the fridge to find toppings that would go with macaroni and cheese. I knew that ground meat from grass-fed cows would be great for the macaroni and cheese pizza, so I decided that I would fry all of it for tonight's feast.

"May some of the pizzas have fish as well?" Joebear asked.

"Yessir. We can cook the fish together," I said.

Miss Oreo and Kissy walked in the kitchen door and meowed.

"Yes babies. The pizza crust, macaroni and cheese, and fish will be for you, too," I said as I began to fry the ground meat.

Miss Oreo meowed in a high-pitched voice.

"Yes. You can have some ground meat, too," I said as I was cooking.

Oreo was singing opera as I cooked. Joebear joined in and helped me cook the fish.

Once the sauce ingredients were blended, I made several pizzas with cheese and waited for the meat to be finished cooking and the water to boil for the macaroni.

A frog's croak emanated in our kitchen. That was Kiel the Frog, Kermit's long lost brother, who decided that our window ledge was a great place to live.

"Yes KIEL we hear you. I'll give you a whole pizza if you shut up!" Joebear shouted as he flipped the salmon over. "It's going to be glorious when we're done here. This is just too much. And it's hot!"

Joebear wasn't the happiest that our new freeloading guest was staying here. But Kiel the Frog hadn't been here long enough to file an eviction against him.

Kiel the Frog croaked a thank-you croak. Miss Oreo was staring at him through the window.

Kissy laid in the middle of the kitchen.

When the fish was done, we placed it on the pizzas. One pizza had half fish and the other half ground meat on it. That one was going to be for the cats.

The water began boiling when Kiel the Frog spoke again.

"KIEL! WHAT DO YOU WANT?!" Joebear shouted as he poured the macaroni in the water.

Kiel the Frog croaked in a special language.

"He wants insects on his pizza," Miss Oreo translated.

"Well, fuck, there's plenty of them around here," Joebear said as he stirred the macaroni.

I went to check our bug zapper unit outside and sure enough, there were plenty of insects to put on his pizza. But I had to make an extra crust for Kiel the Frog. I didn't add sauce or cheese to his pizza.

Joebear was putting the ground beef on the remaining pizzas while I was making the extra pizza crust.

Kissy walked over and ate whatever we dropped on the floor.

"Make his pizza by itself after these are done," Joebear said.

"Will do, bae," I said as I was making the cheese sauce for the macaroni.

Joebear was putting cheese on the pizzas.

"BaeWhuhh. Cook and eat while I deliver the pizzas to the bears outside," I said as I stirred the cheese sauce. I was trying to place these pizzas in the oven.

"What are you doing, Bae?! The macaroni and cheese goes on the pizza before you put it in the oven!" Joebear said as he drained the macaroni.

"Oh shit you're right," I said as I put the pizzas back on our counters and tried to retrieve my brain from left field. "My brain went into left field." I put out a big bowl for him to put the macaroni in. He poured the macaroni in the bowl, and I combined it with my cheese sauce. When the macaroni and cheese was stirred, we placed it on the pizzas and put them in the oven for about 20 minutes.

Joebear and I watched Twitch.TV streamers lag while the pizzas were cooking. Kissy went to her litter box and took a shit before she returned. Miss Oreo sat on my feet.

When the pizzas were finished, I gave the cats their pizza. They rushed over and ate the pizza crust. I gave my husband a pizza. I put the remaining pizzas on a wide stainless steel cart with three racks that Chipotle Mexican Restaurant gave to me as a reward for being a frequent customer.

Joebear came in and ate some pizza while he was preparing Kiel the Frog's pizza.

"Love you BAE!!!!" I shouted as I rolled my cart of pizzas out of the house.

"Love you, bae!" Joebear shouted from the kitchen.

I rolled the cart outside and saw that a lot of bears were coming for pizza. They were hungry again. I rolled the cart back home when the bears were finished taking the pizzas and running. My bear can use it when he delivers the other pizzas.

"You should eat, little bae," Joebear said.

"I should," I said before I hiccupped.

"You got excited,"Joebear said as he put two pieces of pizza on a plate and handed it to me. He also grabbed a glass of water for me.

"Yes, Bae-hiccup-whuhh!" I shouted. I hiccupped and tried to drink water upside down. I drank a bit before I heard scratching at the door.

"What the?" Joebear asked as he headed to the door. I followed him.

The scratching continued. We looked out the front window and saw a black and white applehead chihuahua scratching at the door.

"Awwawwwww!!!" I shouted with a hiccup.

"Why?" Joebear asked the dog outside. "What is it? Who are you?"

"I am Maxwell Balalalalalalalalalas. Bruce Balalalalalalalalalas sends his thanks and regards for helping him... us... find a new tribe of bears to commune with," Maxwell Balalalalalalalalalas said.

I laughed so hard at his last name that my hiccups went away. "You're welcome, Maxwell Balalalalalalalalalas... haha. You're a beautiful boy," I said.

"Thank you," Maxwell Balalalalalalalalalas said. "My last name is hilarious, I know. I struggle to say it without barking quickly in amusement." He laughed like a dog.

"Yeah? What nationality is it?" I asked.

"No idea. You'd have to ask Bruce," Maxwell Balalalalalalalalalas said.

"You do realize that I know two Bruces now," I said. The timer for the pizzas went off. Joebear tended to the oven. He took out Kiel the Frog's pizza and delivered it to him.

"Yes. Bruce Ace drove us here," Maxwell Balalalalalalalalalas said. "Are you cooking pizzas in there?"

"Yes. Joebear is putting more of them in the oven," I said.

"Good. I ate one, but I have a bear's appetite. I'd like another," Maxwell Balalalalalalalalalas said with an affirmative bark.

Just as I was ready to let him eat again, I heard the United Kingdom national anthem playing loudly outside.

"Are you serious? I thought we left the United Kingdom on Earth," Maxwell Balalalalalalalalalas said.

"Nope. The United Kingdom got the hell off Earth," I said as I opened the door and saw a United Kingdom spacecraft in the air. I blinked. Some wild shit was going to happen soon.

"What the hell?" Joebear shouted before he joined us outside. "Well, the elite from the United Kingdom wasted no time getting here."

Kiel the Frog croaked loudly.

"Yes, Kiel, it is crazy," Joebear said.

I heard a loud sigh coming from the right side of me. Maxwell Balalalalalalalalalas bolted toward the sighing Bruce Bananas and his quieter mate, Abigail Ace.

Bruce Bananas turned toward the United Kingdom spaceship and sighed.

Miss Oreo meowed loudly.

"What, Oreo, whaddya want?" I asked.

Miss Oreo rubbed up against my leg.

"Whaddya want?" I asked as I pet her.

"More imperialist bullshit. I guess we couldn't have enough on Earth, huh? SIGH!!!!!" Bruce Bananas said with a sigh and growl.

Miss Oreo meowed loudly.

Bruce Bananas turned to Miss Oreo. "If this keeps up, our stay on this planet is temporary. We never learn, do we?" he asked.

Miss Oreo laid down and stared at him thoughtfully. Maxwell Balalalalalalalalalas sat next to her and nodded to Bruce Bananas.

"You have made yet another wise observation, Father. I am honored to be your dog," Maxwell Balalalalalalalalalas said.

"Thank you," Bruce Bananas said as he leaned down to pet Maxwell Balalalalalalalalalas.

Miss Oreo stared at Bruce Bananas before she went to see Kissy who was drinking from the stream.

Abigail Ace saw that the ship was coming closer to landing. "Xara, I must bathe at once. Royalty is coming. Please allow me to use your shower," she said quickly. Her blue eyes were wide.

"Sure thing, Abigail Ace," I said as I led her to the shower.

Kissy growled lowly at Miss Oreo who was staring her down.

"Girls!" I shouted as I approached Kissy and Miss Oreo. The cats scattered. Miss Oreo kept meowing. "Oreo, quit. Oreo. Oreo."

"Thank you," Abigail Ace said as we entered the house.

Miss Oreo was following me and meowing. She stared intently at me.

"Oreo, quuuuuiiiiittttt!" I sang as I was showing Abigail Ace where the master bathroom was.

"She must need you," Abigail Ace said as she was heading in the shower.

"Yep," I said as Miss Oreo was rubbing up against my leg. I saw her and realized that she needed cat business and an ass beating.

0 notes

fae-fucker · 6 years

Text

Zenith: Chapter 18-19

Chapter 18

We’re in Nor’s POV again, so prepare for edge. Though that can be said about literally every chapter in this book.

Nor is having a dream about how she’s being crushed by a small rock that feels like a bunch of very big rocks. And then she falls into an abyss (relatable), and into a big ol’ fire.

It’s very dramatic, and also? Symbolism.

Extremely symbolism.

She wakes up.

She was so cold. Her body, coated in sweat, was attracting the frigid recycled air that clung to her like a second skin.

How does one “attract” air? I know what they’re trying to say but like, at some point you just gotta stop trying to twist more meaning and drama out of every meaningless detail.

People say show don’t tell, but here, Shinsay follows up their telling with really dubious showing. Why do you do this? Just to pad the word count? More words doesn’t make you a better writer.

We’re introduced to Zahn, who is Nor’s bodyguard and also lover. They cuddle for a bit and Nor thinks about how nobody but Zahn is allowed to see her this vulnerable.

“I couldn’t breathe. I couldn’t think, Zahn.” She lifted her prosthetic hand to her face to wipe away the tears, then dropped it, disgusted by the sight of the gold metal, of the scars marring her upper wrist. Disgusted with herself for feeling so weak.

Ah. We’re doing this now, are we?

It’s okay though, because Zahn takes her fake, disgusting hand and kisses her tears away!

How sweet.

“You’re safe,” he said with a sigh. “I will always protect you, Nor.”

“I don’t need protecting,” she whispered.

I know this is supposed to be deep and not true, but she’s basically telling him, her bodyguard, that she only pays him to sleep with her.

To many people, Nor was the stone-cold ruler who haunted the nightmares of her foes. But to Zahn, she was just Nor. The love of his life, as he was hers.

Cool cool. The narrative then continues to talk about how they were there for each other when the war took their families and how he’s the only one who’s seen her at her weakest and bla bla bla.

This chapter is literally just a massive infodump about this new rando. You couldn’t have woven his existence into the narrative in a more elegant way, Shinsay?

“Don’t leave me,” Nor said, looking up into his eyes. Seeing the passion mirrored there.

“I would never dream of it,” he said.

Their lips touched, and his hands slid down her bare back, gentle at first. Then hungry for more as she let him lay her back down.

“I love you,” Zahn said. “My Nhatyla.”

The lingering fear from her nightmare trickled away as a very different sort of feeling took its place.

“A very different sort of feeling,” Shinsay?

Are you two grown women or twelve actual years old, combined? Why is this so coy? You can’t have both all these MATURE and EDGY characters who are all about TEH SECKS and VIOLENS while basically giggling like tweens whenever you make a reference to fucking.

If you don’t want to deal with the subject, why include it at all? This is YA, isn’t it? Teens can handle discussions and references to sex. You could probably even get away with sex scenes if you write them carefully and don’t make them too explicit.

If you wanted to be completely PG, why is everyone always making grody sex jokes? If you wanted them all to have amazing sex lives, why don’t you have them (and the narration) speak maturely and openly about the subject?

I do not understand the reasoning behind any of this.

Chapter 19

We’re back with Dex, who, if you recall, kissed Andi without her consent in chapter 17.

DEX HAD FORGOTTEN how fast Andi’s reflexes could be when she was mad.

Furious, actually, he thought, as he watched the shock on her face melt into a mask of pure, boiling rage.

The sentence above, my friends, is a perfect illustration of why I have such problems with purple prose and using a bunch of “pretty descriptions” that don’t mean jack shit just to show off how deep your writing is.

Allow me to be extremely nitpicky and go off on a tangent while I analyze this ... word vomit.

Melting happens when something gets warm enough to change state from solid to liquid, but without necessarily boiling. In writing, the word usually has positive connotations. ”Molten” metals are often used as eye colors for love interests, people “melt” when another person does something sweet or romantic for them, et cetera.

It makes people think of warmth, softness, pliability.

When Andi’s shock melts into “a mask of rage,” it implies that the rage is solidified, but also that it’s fake, because it’s only a mask. Then we’re told that it’s actually boiling still. The fact that her shock is “on” her face doesn’t help.

Now, I know what you’ll say: Eff, this isn’t literal! It’s all just a metaphor!

But metaphors have to make sense, and conflicting, confusing visuals and concepts do nothing but shine a spotlight on the author’s carelessness. They’ve picked these words because they have inherent meaning and they sound good and intense, but without understanding how to use that meaning to their advantage.

If Shinsay wanted to keep the “hot rage” angle, I’d suggest something like this:

Dex watched as the shock on Andi’s face boiled over into white-hot rage.

Jesus Christ, I’m only two sentences in.

Anywhoo, Andi beats Dex with a chair. I would’ve killed him on the spot but I’ll take what I can get.

Andi spat on the ground, then rubbed her lips with the back of her sleeve. For one moment, she looked purely Andi, angry as a wet feline and terrifyingly beautiful.

...

So uh. For future reference: Comparing to your badass, ruthles space pirate to a wet cat

is probably the dumbest fucking thing you can do.

I guess Dex is also impressed that Andi looks like Andi.

And here I thought standards couldn’t go any lower.

Maybe there’s a message of positivity in there? Dex loves you if you look like you, girls! Just be yourself, and also angry as a wet cat.

Then he saw the moment when Andi’s face changed. She transformed into someone else entirely; an actress playing the perfect part.

So you’re gonna describe to me how her shock melts into a mask of rage and how she looks angry like a wet cat, but you won’t tell me how Dex sees her slip into the role of an actress playing the perfect part? Something that would actually be quite interesting to witness?

Figures.

Andi starts acting like Dex cheated on her and Lira and Breck join in as the other women, which for some reason confuses Dex, the ultimate mastermind that he is. He catches on eventually as the other patrons start surrounding them in the hopes of a juicy fight.

Breck kicks him and he flies across the room, which is absolutely delightful and I love it. She kicked him into the table of the Lunamere guards (finally someone does something smart) and a fight with them breaks out.

Dex wasn’t the tallest man by Mirabel standards, but what he lacked in height, he made up in speed and agility—and above all, the desire to win.

And as we all know, people who lose always actually want to lose, and the guards he’s fighting against just don’t want to win enough!

Makes perfect sense.

He was all grace and glory as he spun and whirled, taking out Lunamere guards as they rushed forward in hopes of sinking their knives into his gut.

Don’t make me do a GLORY count. Blease.

We switch POV to Andi. This entire chapter/fight scene is for some reason broken up into chunks, even though it’s all the same one scene and at one point we don’t even switch POVs, but the scene break is still there?

Who edited this?

[The Lunamere guard] howled and dropped, and then she was off again, leaping over his fallen form, her hands itching to raise hell, draw blood and spread the glory of her name.

The Bloody Baroness was here.

She’d make sure every single one of them knew it.

THE GLORY OF HER NAME

Note how Andi seems to just love this. I guess when the narrative needs her to be ruthless and badass, she’s all about being the Bloody Baroness and loves to SPREAD HER GLORY, but when she’s angsting, it’s all about how much she hates murder and remembers every single person she’s killed.

Cheap, Shinsay. You’re cheap and so is your book.

Another POV skip. We’re back with Dex. It’s still the same scene, same fight.

The plan was in place. Everything was glorious, beautiful, blessed disarray.

GLORIOUS

Another scene break. We’re back with Andi. Holy shit, this is such a terrible, disconnected, patchy mess.

Dex was cornered with his back against the bar, fresh green blood oozing from a cut on his brow.

Proof that his blood is actually green, in case y’all didn’t believe me.

Idk what this means or if it will ever be explained, but whatever.

Every part of Andi’s soul told her to get the hell out of there before the Sparks went off. She could abandon the mission. Leave Valen Cortas in prison, with Dex beside him once the warden of Lunamere caught wind of this.

But as she stood back and watched the clock tick down, some tiny part of herself, some animal thing deep down, began to claw its way back up and out into the smoky pub light.

The Bloody Baroness never turned away from a fight.

See? Andi enjoys this, and willingly chooses it when she can do otherwise. So then why does Shinsay insist on making her all angsty and sad about the people she murders?

YOU CAN’T HAVE YOUR CAKE AND FUCK IT TOO, SHINSAY.

With a sigh, she pushed herself forward, swinging her borrowed knives as if they were extensions of her body. Little pieces of heaven clutched in her hellraising fists.

With a sigh? Why is she acting like she doesn’t have a choice and this is a chore, like her mom told her to clean her room? Oh my god.

And yeah, I had to look at “little pieces of heaven clutched in her hellraising fists,” and now so do you.

Anyway, the “Sparks” (if they were explained, I didn’t pay attention) that Andi’s team set up around the bar go off and:

Then the whole world exploded around [Andi and Dex].

God, I wish they could die in the explosion.

#eff reads: zenith #book rants

17 notes · View notes

panticwritten · 6 years

Text

Breaking Furnace Book One: Lockdown

Chapter 9: Picking Up the Pieces

Table of contents!

All of my writing!

I have been suffering for the past two weeks because I love this chapter. There’s only one more after this, then it’s on to book two! Solitary focuses a lot more on Connor, so that’s always exciting.

(I’ve had to change quite a bit of formatting to post this on tumblr because I am a fiend when it comes to using different fonts and tools and junk in my writing. If you want to read this chapter with its original formatting, you can do so HERE.)

Remember that this is a daydream taking place in the Escape From Furnace universe, so keep that in mind if you haven’t read EFF.

Word count: 4790

Content warnings for this chapter:

Drug use (nectar)

Severe physical injury

Forced drug use

Feel free to message me if I’m missing any.

Chapter 10 will be up on June 1st at 7pm PST.

If you like what I do here, maybe consider buying me a Ko-fi or checking out my Patreon! I love being able to put so much out for free, but this would be a great way to show support and also see cool new content!

~-S-~

It’s been two days, and I feel like I’ve already waited too long.

I hold a tablet of the purple nectar in one hand and my key in the other. The rest of the nectar hides safely in my right arm. The tablet glimmers at me, and a feather light thrill of excitement runs up my spine.

Bile rises in my throat along with it, but it’s time to let go of these misgivings. I can’t afford them in the compound.

I turn my attention to the key in my right hand. In this universe, it’s been reduced to a glorified escape hatch. It can shift, sure, but that’s just a party trick. I’m about 90% sure the only thing it’s actually good for here is to get out of this world.

So, of course, Cross can’t be allowed anywhere near it.

Slowly, carefully, I push the key through my abdomen. It takes me a minute to find the perfect place. With only mild discomfort, I adhere it to the underside of my sternum. Even Cross won’t be able to find it here, not without killing me.

That would really be a feat.

I’ve never accidentally died in one of these games, but I have a pretty good idea of what might happen if I did. Everything should fall apart until the universe can’t sustain itself, everyone thrown back to the Cube.

I try not to think about the other possibilities.

I drop down from my bunk, sauntering to the gap in the bars to scan the yard. Inmates mill in small groups, a few younger kids playing tag near the stairs. It’s a quiet day, all in all, and that’s likely because the idiot I’m looking for is nowhere to be found.

Of all days for Kevin to be MIA.

“Should I be worried?”

I flick my eyes up, in the direction of Connor’s cell, to find him watching me from the fourth floor. I roll the tablet of nectar between my fingers, and I practically feel his brow raise.

This’ll be nothing. Try not to get caught up in it, alright?

Disbelief slides along the wire, and I wait patiently.

“I thought you wanted this to be believable,” he says eventually, and I’m surprised to hear a smile in his voice. “If I’m sitting here, tail tucked in my cell, how many red flags does that send?”

I hesitate, squashing the instinct to argue because he’s right.

“Fine. Do whatever you want.”

♥♥♥c♥♥♥

My stomach turns at their words, delivered in the same cutting, falsely cavalier tone as their lookalike in the In-Between.

However, the echoing ramble of the irritation sliding between us, the way the vermilion clouds hug close to their shoulders, tells me their spite isn’t directed at me. They move the nectar between their fingers again, a soft twisting in the back of my head, and I think they catch my anxiety this time. The orange cloud dissipates, at least, their attention turning to something in the yard.

“It’ll be okay,” they promise. “In the end, all of this will be fine.”

And they throw the pill to the back of their throat.

Holy shit.

I almost don’t have enough time to yank myself out of their head, and even that doesn’t seem to be enough. I can still feel the haze of darkness scattering their thoughts. I feel their nails digging into their palm, hard enough to break the skin.

I feel their impulse control shatter.

I’m still frozen in place, trying to extract myself from the tangled and spreading trap of nectar, when they stagger into the yard and I see what prompted this. Several Skulls just waltzed into the yard, Kevin in the center of the group. Sawyer makes a beeline for them, their strides growing more streamlined with every second. I watch, helpless.

Kevin shouts something, a joke, a welcome, a mistake.

The other Skulls take a step back when Sawyer gets close enough.

Sawyer grabs him by the neck of his shirt.

G̸Y͢M.͘ ͝NOW̢.̶

The growl slides right through my defenses, digging slimy fingers into my head. The flickering image of a too-wide grin borne by the nectar knocks my feet into motion.

I’m halfway down the first staircase before I register that I’ve even looked away.

This is the plan, but god, I wish it wasn’t.

By the time I sprint into the yard, the excitement in the place already hitting a fever pitch, Sawyer’s nowhere to be seen, and the crowd surges toward the gym.

God. Fucking. Damn it.

TH̨I̴S̡ W̸AS ͠AL̶WA͜YS͘ A ̡J͡O̶͟҉K̵̸E̶͢͠ T̕O ̛Y͝OU,͢ ͝ẀASN̶'͝T̡ ̢I͘T?

I feel their fist land on soft flesh, too hard. It reverberates up my own arm, the satisfaction churning among the nectar flashing across the wire like acid. I don’t dare reach out to them, I couldn’t hope to win against the nectar. All I can do is hold myself as far away from them as possible.

A single, desperate part of me hopes the wire will snap so I can just think.

A wall of clamoring inmates blocks me from getting any closer to the gym, I can’t even see the door. Another strike vibrates my bones, this time through my right leg. Again. A third time.

That’s too hard a hit, the human body can’t take that, they’re going to kill him.

A hand lands on my shoulder.

The panic dissipates for an instant.

Then—

P̕A͜͡T҉̀H́ET̀͡I̡C͞͏͟.̛̀

I can’t tell if I hear the word aloud, or if it’s just that deafening in my skull. I shove the kid in front of me hard enough to knock him out of the way. It seems to give everyone the right idea, because now when I push ahead the inmates let me through.

͢҉͠REM̕͟ÉM͠B̡E̛͞R͡ T̛H̀I̷͏͞S ̡T́H͟E ̴̷̛N҉̨Ę͠X͘͡T̸̨ ̢TI̢M̨̧̀E ̴͜YO͢҉U̢ U͟͞ ̕N̶̨͞ ̡̡̕͞͝D̵̵̢ ͟É́͜͝ ̶̷̛̀͢R̡̢͠ ̵̨͜E҉͠͞͝ ̡̧S̀͝ ͝T̸͝ ͢I͟͝͠ ̡́̕M͏͟͏҉ ҉̸̕A҉͘ ̸̛̕͢͏T̨̛́͞ ̵̧̀͡͡E̡͢͡ ̵̴̧ ̷̵̨̡͢M̧̢͜͝ ͜͏̸Ę̸͠.̵̧̡͘͝

The wire trembles, and for a horrifying moment I think it might actually break, but it doesn’t. It stabilizes, and the first thing pouring down is horror. A firehose of sticky disgust drowning out the nectar until the darkness subsides into a glassy black lake beneath the surface.

I stumble into the gym, just in time for them to back into me.

And in time for the siren to blare.

I don’t move, eyes on Sawyer, when they slowly turn around to face me. I’m scared, for a second, that their eyes will be black when they look up.

They’re not.

They don’t betray the waterfall of self-loathing dancing on the wire, distant and hardly focused, but their eyes remain gray as always.

Thank fucking Christ.

They stare at me, unmoving, the instant suspended in time by the siren screaming in the background.

Then the siren ends, and their gaze flicks behind me. Rushed, babbling words halt the flow of emotion between us.

“Fix Kevin. He’s an idiot and an asshole but he doesn’t deserve this.”

I don’t really get a chance to answer before I’m shunted to the side. Stumbling, barely able to stay on my feet, I almost miss Sawyer looking back over their shoulder as two blacksuits drag them to the exit.

A third hangs back to inspect something on the floor of the gym. I turn back to see Kevin lying still against the far wall. He looks dead, but I can’t exactly ignore Sawyer’s last request.

I really hope it isn’t actually their last request.

I brace myself and step between Kevin and the suit. Surprise flits over the man’s eyes, but he doesn’t seem angry. He doesn’t try to push past me or berate me in any way.

Lucky guess, that he’s one of ours. I’ve been in this prison for two years, and I have no idea how Sawyer can tell these guys apart.

“Cross catches you out of bounds, you’re good as dead.”

It’s not a threat.

I shrug. “We’re all on our way out anyway, aren’t we?”

He eyes me for a beat and turns back without another word.

Alone in the gym, I turn on my heel and stoop to Kevin’s side. I can’t help but breathe a sigh of relief when I find him alive. Three of his fingers stick up the wrong way and blood oozes between his lips, but the dazed look he gives the ceiling tells me he probably doesn’t even notice.

Holding a hand over him, I spread my awareness throughout his body and try to take stock of the damage. He doesn’t respond to the invasion, and that alone tells me I don’t have much time.

Still, he’s lucky.

The scene in his abdomen is nasty, a horrific hyperbole of what he did to them, but his spine is still intact and his shattered ribs and sternum came up short of his heart. The bones in his hand may as well be gravel for all good they’ll do him, the cracks reaching halfway up his forearm.

This is what the nectar does. It kills people, either physically or mentally, and there’s little you can do to fight it without succumbing to the poison yourself.

Why the hell did I think this was a good idea?

The siren rings again, the shock doors opening in the yard, and that snaps me out of it. I should be out there in the circle, but Kevin will be dead by the time I return. I’m sure Cross has better things to do than lynch me for staying in the gym now that he has Sawyer.

I shake my head and put it from my mind, refocusing on Kevin’s wounds.

Pressing a hand against his chest, I slowly bring the bones there back where they belong and fuse them together. I try to be as brief and precise as possible, but it still brings a shriek of agony from the gang leader. I try to repair the new bleeds as I go, but there’s only so much I can do when I’m off my head like this.

I lower my hand and try to pinpoint all of the damage here. Sawyer bruised everything and turned his liver to mush. It’s faster and much less painful to repair these, and Kevin seems to be gaining some life.

His head snaps around, and he tries to struggle upright. I nearly have to tackle him to keep him down.

“We aren’t done yet,” I mutter, moving on to his arm.

“Sawyer?” His voice is slurred, but the fact that he can talk is a good sign.

While his eyes are still unfocused, I start bringing the bones in his hand back in place. He immediately curses and tries to jerk away, but I hold firm.

By the time I’m finished, he looks more than recovered. He’s not in danger of dying, at least. Maybe of passing out, if I’m even close to right about how much blood he just lost.

“The fuck just happened?”

I glance up at him, at the anger there. Swallowing, I shrug. “They decided to join the warden.”

“Y’should’ve stopped her,” he shoots back, inspecting his hand.

I bite back what I want to say and stand.

“I’m not their keeper.”

He starts struggling up, grumbling about it. On his feet, swaying slightly, he glares at me. I know that look.

He’s looking for another fight after getting his ass handed to him.

Before either of us can move, a group bursts into the room. They’re behind me, but I don’t dare turn my back on Kevin. I can definitely hear them, though, Dominic arguing with Bodie and his brother.

“Connor, what—”

“I said, out!” Bodie cuts across him.

Kevin narrows his eyes, but I still don’t look away. A short scuffle picks up, and Kevin finally backs down. I follow him with my eyes as he walks by, saying nothing when he clips my shoulder with his.

Finally turning around, I watch him wave the other Skulls out. They glare daggers at my cellmate before following, but that might be because they look worse off than he does.

He watches them leave, then turns worried eyes on me.

I don’t know what to say to him. The way he looks at me, like I might have answers, turns my stomach. When he starts what I assume is the beginning of a question, I wave a hand irritably and start for the door.

Dominic follows me, and I can feel his questions at my heels as well. The buzz in the yard doesn’t hide the thick silence between us while we climb the stairs.

Alex and Zee are already sitting on my bunk, waiting. They look up, and I still don’t have a clue what to say about Sawyer’s betrayal.

‘Betrayal.’

I expect the questions to come immediately, but the cell remains silent. When I look at the three of them, at Dominic climbing onto his bunk, I realize just how bad this must look. They don’t know. I look away, back out at the bright lights of the prison, sweeping my awareness out for the others.

It takes a few tries to fight through the anxiety dragging me back, but I eventually get a good idea of what’s going on.

Donovan sits in the yard, listening to Kevin jabber about what happened. Gamzee isn’t far away, so I’ll just assume he’s listening too. Monty and Jimmy have tucked themselves into a corner of the trough room, Monty telling Jimmy that he never trusted them.

Even when they call you a traitor, huh?

I turn back to the three behind me, my expression grave. They look scared, like they should be. Sawyer on the side of the enemy, that spells out destruction. I don’t think that I stand a chance against them, not when they have nectar on their side.

But that still leaves the unspoken question: What do we do now?

“This is bad,” I say lamely. It sounded better before I said it, but I have to swallow my misgivings and move on. “We don’t know what they’re up to, but this doesn’t really change anything. I think we should follow the plan and hope for the best.”

“‘Hope for the best?’” Alex echoes. He isn’t looking at me, chewing on a fingernail and staring into the middle distance. “The best thing we can do is take a flying leap. End this before it can get worse.”

“You don’t mean that,” Zee mutters. “We’ve done it without them before, we can do it again.”

“Can we?” We all look at Dominic. He glances between the three of us, then continues. “They know our plan. Hell, they made the plan.”

I wave the concern away, thinking hard.

“Cross has known, every time, how we get out of the prison. We’ve always made it out. I think he just wants to prove he can win the fight in the tower, that he deserves to be Furnace’s favorite.”

Even though Furnace has been dead for more than a year now.

“He’ll definitely be ‘Furnace’s favorite’ now that he’s convinced Perry to turn on us.”

I don’t look, nodding at the thought, when Donovan brushes past me to join the others. He considers me expectantly, and the other three mirror his expression. I stare back at them.

“What?”

“With them gone, that makes you the leader, right?”

It’s Alex that says it, and that surprises me more than anything. He was the original ‘leader,’ the one that kept the group together before Sawyer decided to jump into the story. If anyone deserves to call the shots, it’s him.

It’s his story that we stole, and this isn’t what I do.

I’m used to helping.

Sending gifts through the walls of a universe and sneaking pieces of memories to Jay, that’s what I’m good at. I give advice, not lead people into impossible battles while convincing those behind us we can win. Then actually win. The idea of leading this group without them in the background pulling the strings knocks my heart into my throat.

But the others seem to agree with Alex. They wait for me to begin, so I mentally smooth myself. Sawyer’s gone, and I’m left to clean up this mess.

I guess I finally know how they felt.

“Here’s what we’re going to do.”

~-S-~

I pace the lab, pausing now and then to sift through papers on the tables. This place is a mess. If I’m going to be doing anything around here, we’ll need some organization.

Cross keeps prattling on behind me. He’s been talking since I arrived. I stopped listening a long time ago, before we passed the infirmary.

My mind is still running faster than I can follow, the nectar still doing its work. By now it will have infected my marrow and begun replicating.

I need to get a grip, find my center. I need to get to work on something, anything, if I want to stay sane. I scratch the inside of my forearm idly, reading notes on the composition of the different nectars.

There’s nothing about the blue stuff here, either.

“Perry, did you hear me?” the warden snaps, pulling me back to the surface. I jerk my head in a sharp nod, but he repeats himself anyway. “Never come past the wheezers’ cells on your own. Not until you’ve gone through your—”

“I’m not doing the surgeries.” I interrupt, waving him away with one hand and stacking papers into neat piles with the other. “And I’m not leaving the lab; you said yourself that this is where I’ll be most useful.”

He says nothing about the surgeries, a surprise, his frown only deepening at the demand to stay here. “You must work on the recruits in the infirmary, you know that, and there are creations back here that will not hesitate to—”

“You mean the suits you turned against me?” What a joke. “I can protect myself. I might even be able to reverse the damage you’ve done.”

“You can’t hide from your choice,” he says, crossing the room between the tables until he’s at my side. Irritation and venom lace his words, but that’s nothing new.

I ignore him, still organizing the space in front of me. Unfortunately, I can’t ignore him prying a vial from my hands. I finally look at him, with half a mind to spit in his face.

“I’m not an employee, Cross, or a soldier. Not this time. I’m here to do what I need to do. No ‘out-of-bounds,’ no lies, no bullshit,” I pause for a fraction, then add, “No surgeries.”

I start a little when he smiles. A surprisingly familial offering, similar to the ones he gives to the blacksuits when they’re still recovering from their training. I narrow my eyes, studying him.

He places the vial in a test tube rack before speaking. “No surgeries.”

I watch him for a beat longer, wary, but turn back to the table to continue gathering up loose papers.

“Although,” he adds. I don’t look at him. I stare the page at the top of my stack of paper. Isolating memory manipulation. “A few days in the screening room do seem to be in order.”

The words reach my ears, but I don’t think I really hear them. I do turn, however, in time to see a flash of light glinting on glass. The information hits the part of me that matters, the part that can still think, at the same time the needlepoint pierces the skin on my neck.

I scream and claw at the skin, but it’s too late. The needle is gone, the syringe empty. I expect the fire of nectar, but this is different. A murky haze glazes my vision and wall of darkness pushes against my mind. Another sharp pinch on my upper arm, and I look to my brother in confusion.

The fluorescents above Cross blur into a twisted caricature of holy light. I don’t remember why I’m supposed to be so scared. I don’t even realize that I’m falling until I hit the floor and hear Cross sigh.

“This is all for your own good. You will thank me in the end.”

~-S-~

Whispers all around me.

The sounds are too far away for me to understand, but my annoyance still swells. I have something important to do, but I don’t remember what. The memories I need dance just out of reach, pulling apart amid the whispering and the rush of an unseen river whenever I get too close.

The whispers get closer the longer I keep my eyes closed, and I’m dangerously close to getting a headache. Louder, overpowering the pulse of the water swallowing everything else.

Oh.

I think someone’s talking to me.

I tune in to the voice, now, finally interested. It’s vaguely familiar, but I can’t quite place it. There’s some sort of accent, different from my own.

Sounds punchable, anyway.

“... unless the machines are broken. I’ve gotten used to specimens ignoring me, but my patience is wearing thin. I’ll start the reels soon, whether you answer me or not. Are you ready?”

He sounds angry. At me? He obviously knows I’m awake.

My eyes flick open, and I find that I’m sitting up. I’m strapped into a chair, though I’m not sure why. My head is fixed in position facing a blank projection screen. The sight stirs some sort of memory, crying out in revolt.

“Ah, there you are,” the voice from before says, halting my thoughts. I peer into the corner of my eyes to find a man I recognize. Cross?

Cross.

The warden. Yeah, punchable is in understatement. I don’t know how much control I have over my own face, but something in my expression prompts a chuckle from him.

“What the hell are you doing, Cross?” I demand, pulling against the straps on my arms. “Are you insane?”

There’s a small click behind me, and the projector comes to life. I try to close my eyes, but a suit has already come forward to pin them open.

“I had to do some tedious work to find these reels, but I think it will be worth it. After this, you shouldn’t have any second thoughts about leaving those friends of yours.”

Cross continues talking, but I stop listening when the suit moves to reveal the screen. These are my memories, as well as the memories of others within my mind.

He’d been in the memory sectors, watching Furnace’s memories. I knew that. I knew that, and I should have known it wasn’t sentimentality that brought him there.

“Now, I have some complications to deal with. We’ll have to lock away those suits, for a rainy day...”

Cross’s voice fades yet again and I barely notice the pinch in my arm as an IV is inserted. The blue nectar flows smoothly into my system as the edges of my memory go fuzzy again.

This is different than any other nectar I’ve tried before. It’s not a river, pounding against the sides of my head, no, this is new. As if in a dream, sticky fingers drag me under a pool of shimmering dark water. The light of the projector dances in my eyes, distracting me from the thought of struggle.

None of this feels real.

I stare at the screen, seeing but not seeing. It occurs to me that this was a mistake. I don’t know what to do. All of my abilities within this world mean nothing anymore if I can’t fight this, can’t reach my fingers up through the surface of the nectar.

Then, all of that slides into the abyss as well.

♥♥♥c♥♥♥

I’ve been listening for Sawyer, hoping they would reach out to me, ever since they disappeared into the compound.

In the lull of the nectar’s activity, I managed to pull back a safe distance from their thoughts. I intend to stay that way, far away, unless they seek me out first.

I can’t risk looking for them. I can’t risk tangling the two of us together again. We shouldn’t have gotten that streamlined in such a dangerous universe in the first place.

There was one brush from them a few hours again, a lazy touch. They felt half-asleep, and I couldn’t decipher anything more than the swirling eddies of nectar-borne fury.

Since then, the wire has been vibrating, an annoyance that I can barely feel. Gentle strumming that I attribute, once again, to the nectar. It buzzes in the back of my head like a fly against glass, making it hard to concentrate on Dominic.

He slaps a hand against the table, bringing my attention back to him.

“Did you hear me?”

“I—” I run a hand over my my face and sigh. “No. Sorry.”

He leans back on the bench, brows furrowed. In the end, it’s relief when he doesn’t pursue it.

“When’s Gary supposed to get here?”

“A week or two, I think.” I answer promptly. “Sawyer was pretty vague.”

“Damn.” He looks away, out into the chattering crowd in the trough room. “Do you think this was their plan from the beginning?”

“No.” The response comes out before I can stop it, and Dominic turns his eyes on me again. Shit. “I don’t think so, at least. I hope not.”

“Where did they get the nectar?” he asks. There’s something in his tone, a note that wasn’t there before, and it makes me uneasy. It feels like an interrogation.

I need to divert this now. With the buzz of the wire increasing, I’m not sure how long I’ll be able to keep my head clear.

Lights, camera, action.

“I don’t know. They didn’t—”

I force my voice to cut out, eyes to unfocus in an act I’ve seen from Sawyer too many times to count. ‘Of course, I just realized something,’ their surprised gasp seemed to say, ‘as if it didn’t occur to me several minutes go, as if I’m not the cause, as if I didn’t already know.’

I hope I pull it off, anyway.

“The hole.”

“Th—” A startled sound in his throat breaks him off, and the realization I faked hits him. He moves forward to lean on the table. “We need to get out of here.”

I shake my head.

“We need to wait for Gary. He might be a pain in the ass, but we’ll die without him.” I push up from the table and lift my tray. It’s too loud here, too hard to think. “We have to be—”

The wire snaps.

A ringing emptiness takes the place of the vibration, and I find myself staring at the table. I try to break out of the paralysis, to leave the trough room, but I can’t move. I can’t reach out for them with my awareness, search through the In-Between, anything, the dread punching through my gut leaving me useless.

“Connor? You okay?”

Dominic’s voice slices through the shock.

I manage to look at him, the concern on his face maybe the funniest thing I’ve seen in my fucking life. Sawyer’s down in the compound with Cross, drowning in nectar, could be dying for all I know.

And he’s worried about me.

I can’t hold back a laugh that feels wrong even to me. I turn away, shaking my head, biting back every single thing I want to say.

I promised.

I swore I wouldn’t tell anyone.

“Don’t worry about it, Nick.”

~-S-~

The images are all I have.

They blur together, undecipherable words overlaying the pictures on the screen. Hurt and hate, and a voice that holds me like chains. Soft, cloying, as gripping as the darkness dancing in my vision.

If I could move, I’d rip the speaker’s vocal chords out.

A hand drops onto my shoulder, but I can’t find the need to react.

I feel more than hear the visitor speak. I can’t decipher what is said, but the set of sounds, the shape of the words sparks a fire in my chest. The lazy swirls of darkness seize, and I jerk my head.

My mouth moves, a snarl ripping through my throat at the audacity of the intrusion. I don’t know what I say, if I say anything, but fingers dig into my shoulder. Another sound, and I’m slow to recognize it as laughter.

This time, the words rise with meaning through the thick water blurring the world together.

“Very good. You put up a strong fight, but we got there in the end.”

The hand leaves, and I almost forget it was ever there, the light of the images blurring with the first irritating voice once again.

Soon, I think, I’ll silence it.

#madd #maddart #writing #my writing #bf #connor #sawyer #dominic #connor needs a good old fashioned nap #bf writing #the collective

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