#-teary eyes and sneezing i wasn't imagining it. and she got super mad and started yelling)
Text
i haven't been having the best time lately
#sorry vent incoming in tags. you dont have to read you really can skip this#/so the day before yesterday i had a major argument with mom. about something incredibly small but she got super mad at me (basically i#suggested she might have made a mistake while cleaning the oven bc when i turned it on i smelled and felt burning chemicals. like-#-teary eyes and sneezing i wasn't imagining it. and she got super mad and started yelling)#for the whole afternoon it was either silent treatment or yelling abt how what i said is 'unforgivable'#and ofc rejecting apologies and attempts to calm the situation down bc 'this isn't something you can just fix with an apology'#i literally just asked if she's sure everything went right with the oven cleaning. bc it was done in a rush.#so anyway at 10pm i HAD to get the situation to a manageable level bc i was starving and she was in the living room (we have an open kitchen#) so if i wanted to get sth to eat i'd have to confront her. so screaming match ensued again with me apologizing and explaining my point -#and her yelling over me. it went on for 40 minutes. finally after me apologizing like 70 times she calmed down but said that 'what i did is-#-unacceaptable and she does not give permission for it to happen again'. i went to sleep without getting anything to eat of course.#and this fucked me up. bc i really thought we were doing better. i really thought our relationship would only get better now esp after we -#-bonded on vacation. but turns out not. and shes still lowkey mad.#THEN yesterday im studying for a zoology exam and mention it on the phone with her#she goes 'who do you have zoology for'. i respond with the name of the teacher. confused.#'professor (x) died on friday.'#??????????#'it's not published anywhere yet so yeah YOU have to tell your class'#i had a panic attack legit. i threw up from stress. i couldnt do it. first off bc of shock and secondly bc how am i supposed tojust jump#into group chat like 'oh hey btw professor died'#thankfully the info was posted officially by uni at 10pm. so i didnt have to do it. but mom kept pressing me to the whole day#i was nauseaous all of yesterday bc of it. i couldnt manage to study anymore after the shock. sure he was older but he was so energetic and#seemed healthy. i wouldnt have expected it it was just. a huge shock. im still not over it#like you cant know someone for half a year then not be shaken when they suddenly die yknow. and mom is lowkey making fun of me like#'what were you emotionally attached??? he wasnt anyone close'#no he wasnt but im still shaken. and being mocked is only making it worse. as is having to keep studying for his subject for the next few-#-days.#sorry ok vent over theres just. a lot happening for me and im struggling i needed to let it out ig. theres just too much at once#vent#death mention
14 notes
·
View notes
Last Seen Blogs
cj-the-human-disaster
CJ Rosa
nautics-design
Nautics Design
three-seperate-johns
Endlessly Amused by Everything
hystericmanifesto
Giulia.
chakabin
da_manuscript