#'im actually a psychopath not a sociopath ^.^ theres a difference' | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

wawawawawawawawawawawawawa · 1 year

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"ive just seen a lot of ppl #call izaya a sociopath but like. as a Comical Exaggeration #or just as an insult to be disproven" re: ur tags

i don't really go here (drrr!!), but i came across ur blog through a series of events that led me to an ASPD Izaya analysis post that u are connected to. somehow. i dont fucking know man. but like anyways i 100% agree, like have u seen him. Look At Him. i only watched like the first season and havent touched anything else but i can say with 100% certainty That Guy Has ASPD. okay this ask isnt about me telling you i agree with you and others who have that correct opinion, but just wanted to say it.

anyways GODDDD, your tags... i feel that so hard. theres a character im a big ASPD truther for (and its like so obvious. lzaya level obvious), who ALSO gets called "sOcioPatH" and "psYchOPatH" as an insult or joke. and every time im like... "well... no, but actually yes"

no because i can tell you're calling him that to demonize him and seeing as that you are unironically using "sociopath", you obviously dont actually know much about ASPD. but yes because he has ASPD!

AH THE ANALYSIS POST! i can explain: i'm connected to it because the person who wrote it is my fiance, and i'm the mentioned Person With ASPD that he mentions he knows :P

also since im curious: what character?

and i on god HATE it when people use the term "sociopath" unironically its like. im using it because i have aspd, and oftentimes i use it as a derogatory term to draw attention to how derogatory it is. like. i know why i'm using it. why are You using it!

and oftentimes its because they deadass think "sociopathy" is still an actual Thing You Can Be Medically Recognized As and like. bestie. it IS clear u know literally nothing! its like theyre SO CLOSE to getting that the character has aspd but dont actually know HOW aspd works outside of a bullshit stereotype so its only said as a joke and not treated seriously foe actual analysis

im gonna make a comparison here BUT BEFORE ANYONE BUSTS MY BALLS: I AM AUTISTIC. I CAN MAKE THIS COMPARISON. AND EVEN IF I WASN'T, IT'S NOT A THOUGHTCRIME TO IDENTIFY OBVIOUS PATTERNS.

it's like i looked at a very obviously autistic character and kept calling them retarded as a joke. and even though i knew that derogatory term used to refer to an actual thing people have, i refuse to acknowledge the existence of ACTUAL autistic people's ACTUAL experience with autism and how it differs from the VERY derogatory and insulting stereotype of "a retard" and just. kept calling that character retarded because i thought that people with those traits deserved it or something

and then i tagged the post "#tw autism" as like an extra kick in the nuts

but GOD i feel that last paragraph SO hard. its clear ppl notice those traits in him but dont know enough (and dont care to go learn) about the actual disorder. so peoples' real suffering and social ostracization is just a punchline. because "mental health acceptance" ALWAYS has this fucking asterisk of "not you, though" when it comes to (among other things) aspd

its a cruel world out there for aspd blorbo truthers 😔 not only do we have to deal with bullshit ass takes, our backs constantly hurt from the weight of carrying the Correct Opinions 😔😔

#brothers in arms across fandom lines #(unless ur not a guy then its truthers in arms ig 😩)#wasks #fr tell me who it is!! im curious!#r slur tw #<- for That Paragraph

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jewpacabruhs · 5 years

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bruv im still jus. wow. theres so much to say but. do u kno how good it feels... to be jewish, to accidentally fixate on one eric cartman & love him more than any other fictional character for almost seven years now, and then to see him in a little yarmulke, standing at kyle's side while he recites from the torah? do you know how validating that is?

i gotta get personal for a second here. idk how, but in the last few yrs my relationship with my own jewishness has been deeply influenced and intertwined with south park, as ironic and ridiculous as that sounds. i grew up secular, completely nonpracticing; as a child, i was only ethnically jewish, and saw jews as strictly an ethnicity, and a popularly hated one to boot. and it scared me. ive talked about it before, but as a child hearing about the shoah and about antisemitism, i couldn't understand. i thought it was looks for a while, which confused me, because ive got blonde hair and blue eyes and all my family that got caught up in nazi europe did/do too. i remember thinking as a second grader that i would've been spared for that reason; why didn't a good chunk of my family? but i grew up in a mormon neighborhood, with plenty of other blonde kids, and they stayed away from me like i had a disease. this was before puberty, before my hair got a little frizzier and my nose got a little bigger, when i looked just like any of them. but already, at age 8, i was an outsider. i wasn't one of them and i never would be, and they wanted me to know that.

and then i started to get it. it clicked even more once i got to high school and got called a kike every other day - but prior to high school, you know what i found, and you know what really pushed me towards understanding what being a secular jew in america meant? south park. and as a dumb little sixth grader with no critical thinking skills, you know what shaped my opinions on my own people? south park.

and that's good and bad. good because i do sincerely think kyle broflovski is excellent fictional representation for jewish people, maybe one of the top few ever shown on television. he gets on my nerves at times, but he's good through and through, he's well written and multi-dimensional, he's not a walking stereotype but he still has prominent jewish features that jewish viewers can look at and see in themselves, his morals and viewpoints and beliefs are obviously deeply influenced by judaism, hes deeply proud of his heritage and culture... and that all means a lot to me. and by the amount of jewish sp fans that adore kyle, it means a lot to them too.

the bad thing is, yeah, i can't deny it, during older seasons, cartman's treatment of kyle probably taught a lot of young and dumb viewers how to view jews in real life. have i, as a kyman shipper and cartman stan, justified that within a fictional and narrative context? yes. but it doesn't change the real-world effect; south park, but specifically cartman, since he's the mouthpiece, likely did cause some easily-influenced people to pick up antisemitic beliefs. did this contribute to the rise of the alt-right? debatable, but to some extent, possibly. was that m&t's intention and should south park be canceled and denounced? fuck no, i'll always love it lol, and fuck censorship. but it is something that should be taken into account.

matt and trey clearly regret that, and understand that it's no longer acceptable or fitting or needed in today's sociopolitical climate - or, okay, maybe they don't even regret it; they just understand that when fiction becomes reality, the fictional jackass isn't necessary when there's one right there in real life, sitting in the oval office, yeah? old cartman doesn't deserve or need a voice, not when real, awful people actually have one right now. and m&t are actively trying to change cartman for the better and really, really backpedal on his bigotry, while still doing it in a way that makes sense from a story-telling perspective. it's not a complete uncharacteristic change of character; it's shifting with the times and writing it into the character's arc so that it's a logical and plausible development in cartman's story.

cartman's behavior in the last few seasons is consistent character development. m&t themselves are pushing it, and clearly it's sincere; cartman's not faking. unless they're building up a surprise twist over the last, what, three to four seasons, that he was faking the whole time! woah! if so it better be a damn good pay off, because that's a lot of time invested. though that seems more forward-thinking than sp tends to be. they're intentionally stuck in the short-term, aren't they? plot-wise. but their character development is pretty long-term, and right now, cartman is consistently decent, and if it comes across as faking, it's because cartman's over-dramatic in how he speaks, and trey does that intentionally.

that's a tonal thing, and it's hard to say in a fictional character, but as someone who struggles with empathy myself, empathy and sincerity don't go hand in hand. you can lack empathy while still caring enough to sincerely and wholeheartedly apologize for something and mean that apology. not feeling remorse doesn't mean you can't apologize genuinely; the two don't go hand in hand. you can be mentally ill in any capacity, even a psychopath, and still deeply care about things or people, just not in the way someone else might. so you can headcanon that cartman's still a psycho/sociopath, though right now that's actually kinda going against canon, but don't rain on other's parades if they're happy he's exhibiting healthy growth. besides, and i repeat: what could cartman exploit out of faking sincerity for several seasons? nothing, so why bother? he wouldn't, unless it's literal in-show subconscious growth.

does that mean he's magically developed empathy? no. is it becoming less probable he's a legitimate sociopath/psychopath (while still possibly having better-disguised antisocial tendencies)? yes. does he seem to have better coping or anger management skills? somehow, yes! he seems to be legitimately healthier. does this mean he's no longer accountable for his past misdeeds, and even his present, less-severe ones? of course not! and you can still hate him all you want, but modern cartman is not the same as older cartman, and shouldn't be treated as such. because is this growth? absolutely.

he's clearly healthier, even happier. he's less angry, he's still a little shit but he no longer relies on bigotry or cruelty or anger to get the negative attention he thrives off, rather he gravitates towards being simply annoying. you know why he called ice? pettiness, immaturity, a little bit of spite, and a need for silly revenge. he's being intentionally petty, but going about it in a sly but no longer psychopathic way. less hannibal lector and more, idk, regina george, lol. extremely different on the antagonist scale. and cartman's been both.

and maybe it's personal bias on what type of human is worse within fiction, someone unstable and bizarre with violent tendencies (which is how he's come to be viewed in pop culture & some of the fandom, as a result of eps like scott tenorman must die), versus someone inclined towards pettiness and more silent and, i dunno, social-status-and-pride-driven types of revenge (cartman in general when he's not being particularly awful, tbh)... but i think it'd be pretty universally agreed that the latter is at the very least more tolerable, manageable, and even likeable - and certainly more redeemable. let's put it this way; if cartman continued on the path he was on, he'd be one of those tiki holding fucks, wearing a confederate flag hat, and he'd treat kyle soooo much worse. instead, m&t have turned him into a hypocritical false-woke ignorant dumbass - but that's strongly less problematique than it's counterpart, and it works.

because cartman simply serves a different narrative purpose now. and that's not sloppy writing; it's well-timed evolution of a character that stepped into a pre-9/11, pre-trump, pre-social media world! so much has changed, and south park is reflecting that in its characters, most notably in a character who was stuck in the, what, 1960s with his beliefs? that was fine way back when, but matt&trey are smart dudes - they understand that sometimes things have to change. besides, they love cartman, too. he's their favorite. but they understand that when real people act like him, it's not so comedic or satirical or funny, & they don't want to look at cartman, at their creation who they've invested twenty-two years in, and see the all-too-real hate of modern radical white america.

i think we know enough about matt&trey's social stances these days, and the empathy they've seemed to develop after having kids, to understand that they're no longer in their "apathy is best, everyone is stupid" phase. current south park is left-leaning and admittedly preachy at times, but i wouldn't want it any other way. g-d knows it's better this way than if they'd embraced and decided to appeal to their right-libertarian following instead. cartman's evolved in a progressive and positive way, and it's fucking dope, especially to us cartman stans who so badly want him to be good. and he is good right! he's doing so good!

and i know im up my own ass rn but yall know how much i myself have campaigned for jewish kyman/cartman and how much i just deeply and truly adore it, and to see it actualized in a canon episode to some extent? that meant the world to me. i couldn't believe my eyes. i was tellin lai - that's the most genuine, pure, almost violent happiness ive felt in my soul in years. that was like a straight shot of serotonin to the heart. that simple little scene made me so fucken happy yall dont even know. & theres a lot to be said about the political commentary and plenty of other people are analyzing that, but im a simple jewish kyman & cartman stan and boy ive been fed good fjskfkdkdkfk!!!

#in other news #sickly jew shay had her vision white out at school today and almost fell down the stairs #my grandpa has been given a week to live #AND the anniversary of the most important person in my life's death is approaching #and i turn fucking 19 soon and i always have birthday crisises #so fucken superb!#in happier news family guy airs soon and it's unfortunately still a fixation of mine so im unjustly excited #lissen stewie's worn a yarmulke twice in fg canon and i cried then #i love cartman approximately... 50x more than stewie jus bc of longevity and. nostalgia and favoritism #i was in legitimate hysterics #sp continues to be my light at the end of the tunnel jfkskf #mine #txt #sp spoilers #theres so much here im sorry i ramble sm #i struggle w wordz and usin em ironically

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gendrie · 7 years

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I'm curious as to what you think of the fandom's treatment of Sansa, and women characters in general. Part of the reason I think Sansa stans are so fervent on Tumblr is because she is demonized on other platforms, notably Reddit, where they say some of the most vile shit about her. But then that translates to some Sansa fans being overly critical and nasty toward characters like Arya or Daenerys, which is what (I think) you're referring to in some of your posts.

you’re asking me what i think and thats what you’re gonna get, ok? im not some omnipresent being. i couldn’t possibly speak of the entire fandom in absolutes because i only occupy a small space here. all i have is my perspective, limited thing that it is. keep that in mind as i get into this. i think everyone gets treated like shit. mainly the women but its not even limited to that because the way characters like bran and tyrion are treated can be just as disgusting. which characters get hate and why and how and where depends on numerous factors. and what we as fans react to is just as varied.

i know sansa has gotten a lot of hate. it was really common to see people saying she’s weak and stupid and deserved what she got. its misogynistic garbage. and yeah, that the main reason why her stans behave the way they do. i get it. like i said im a spiteful bitch so i understand why they want her to succeed. they put her on a pedestal in a reaction to the hate. it’s as simple as that. but they also used that to hate on virtually every other character. and heres the thing: *i* don’t (regularly) go on reddit or the worg. i don’t have a facebook. i avoid talking to people irl lol. tumblr is the only place where i interact with the asoiaf fandom. so i have never been exposed to this to a serious degree. and even when i did go on the forums they always had strong vocal sansa supporters. from the very beginning i heard alllll about sansa hate and internalized misogyny and thought it was awful…..and then i watched this entire hellsite turn on arya. you say “overly critical and nasty” but that honestly does not even cover it. the way tumblr treated arya for years and years was un-fucking-real. you cant begin to understand unless you were there tbh. i suspect you weren’t because if you had been you’d know *exactly* what im referring to with my posts. theres no way of even explaining in a way that you’ll completely understand but they belittled her trauma like it was nothing. she was weak and stupid (sound familiar?) she was a bad victim™. she was a misogynistic little monster for not liking dresses. she was an inferior character for surviving with “physical strength” and by “acting like a boy”. they called arya a sociopath and a cliche. she wouldve died in kings landing and she was too fucked up in the head and violent to live like a normal person anyway so the only fate for her was death. they regularly theorized she’d die in a ditch or wished she’d become sansa’s servant/pet. they downplayed her significance and reduced her to a badass assassin killer who only existed to kill. she was unlovable and unworthy both in the text and out. all of these opinions were happily supported by the most asoiaf popular meta blog on tumblr. there were countless metas and posts and articles written putting arya down to prop sansa up. when arya’s fans tried to speak up against this they went after us too. we were “bad fans” for loving such an awful character. we glamorized and woobified her and needed to understand that this little girl was actually a terrible psychopath. and they did it all under the guise of feminism. i think that was the most appalling part. it was women and girls doing this while acting as if they were being model feminists. historically, most assholes on the forums have been men. but on tumblr its always been a female demographic. and watching them go after arya felt like betrayal. but then, arya was never a girl to them. which is the crux of the issue.

you might think im exaggerating but im telling you this is what it was like on tumblr. it was a constant, pervasive, mentality among the fanbase against arya. and other characters like dany and bran (anyone who gets in sansa’s way really) but mostly arya where the v. sansa thing is concerned. in a way that ive honestly just never seen with another character. sansa was universally worshiped on tumblr and it was like arya herself was responsible for every bad thing the gross fanboys had said about sansa. tumblr is not a site that encourages discussion or independent thought in the way the boards do. it operates much differently. most people don’t state their own opinions. they reblog other peoples. so once this took root it went unchallenged for a long time. its also a site that has always held feminine women in a higher regard than gender non conforming women. those were dark times. the entire thing is a perfect example of “you either die a hero or live long enough to see yourself become the villain” imo lmao we’re all struggling with our own fandom demons no matter who we stan. ive told you my demons here. im sure sansa stans have their own horror stories that have shaped them too. they relate to her and want her to be the best and brightest in the series. i can dig it. but in doing that it got really ugly. they basically became the thing they hated. they turned on one little girl to defend another.

at the end of the day we’re all reacting to these books and this fandom and our experiences in a million different ways. that being said; i still can’t forgive lol. i understand them and might not perfect myself but they went too damn far. there will never be a resolution to this either. we just keep going around in this circle, forever and ever and ever.

#anon: what do you think of the fandoms treatment of sansa #me: DID YOU MEAN ARYA?#sorry lol #but once i started down that memory lane i couldnt stop #tbf they did bring up how arya's treated in response to sansa hate so #ask #anon

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whimsically-ominously-auspice · 5 years

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Sometimes my brother stays in the house all night. And annoys my kid.

But after tonight i see why.

He had to register his hands as militant weapons. He said militant. lol.

He was in karate all through elementary minus some years and some high school.

He knocked me out with two fingers once then started crying cause he thought I was dead. My mom didn't care. She told him good job.

My little brother paralyzed my arm once by jabbing it. That shit hurt. It was temporary but my arm was sore for days.

So obviously neither are afraid. They have skills,i always believed out powered my own.

I woke my brother up to open a jar but he couldn't either so soon after he went to his home. He said for some,reason no one was outside.

He knows Jesse i know he does cause we used to work the same gas station. Jesse and Stewie are the same but I call him stewie after the Family Guy baby cause he always tries to kill his mom.

He went to ministry school for college and has all kinds of degrees in philosophy and church and all that.

Anyways stewie got a job with my brother at nights and my brother got him fired.

I got him banned but our boss was a bitch thinking about her pussy.

Anyways. So he gets those feels when,there is dumb asses thinking they got a brain.

Me and my kid do too but its different. We don't live by them.

Usually she comes out for a little while with me but she said tonihht she had a feeling she djdnt want,to.

But I know at home,she gets them. Because one of us will sleep,at different times and one of us is always awake.

Thats whn i knpw some type monster you wish only lived under beds has been outside,

I dont say anything. But I think we both know.

.....

I went out again, this time with the light off and smoked. 4th cigar later and my sinus feel great!!

....

I could hear joints pop. Starchy grass being stepped on. And a chain.

I could feel a vehicle's presence. One with people in it.

.....

I heard the truck start drive slowly up,the north mesa. I could hear for so long i knew they were stopped.

...

Random dogs had barked. First in the yard then one 3 acres away. Then in the yard again.

I listened to how many birds chirped and how.

....

I knew someone was there when i moved my foot there was another sound... When you concentrate on doing something and you focus on it... I didn't hear the sound until i had already focused to move..its a random thing but always valid. If i move my foot someone else is moving theirs.

Its a constant.

......

I said shhh to the dogs. I whispered a loud hey that echoed to the weakling that couldn't stand still on the other side of the fence.

No one appropriately responded.

.....

I heard the there's a mother fucker there bark.

....

So i went in and as soon as I did that coward ass took off running to his waiting truck.

.....

I unfortunately can feel people's emotions. So i felt him being terrified. I also felt his chest heaving after running when i went in.

I feel his backward heart hurt the last two nights.

.....

#fbi he wants to kill me but he doesn't know how. Hes wanted to for 20 years after he believed jesse James killed my kids. That's why other people call him Jesse. Ive admitted to be fuddled about certsin things and barely have a glimpse of things. He had me,take an abundance of pills once to over dose. Right after the babies were murdered by their grandpa.

And hes tried to kill me and Annie multiple times.

The only person he has a right to kill is himself or anyone that is trying to kill him -- except when he decided to kill them first. Like me. Because I will kill him.

But if someone like wanted to mug him and had a gun then its okay to defend yourself as best as you can. The goal being to get them away from you and disarmed if possible. But not always death is the answer dependin on who it is.

.....

And since he collaborates with Denise, she focuses him on killing me. So he has a right to kill her to shut her up. Becsuse this is an extreme 20 plus year issue. Its not an issue for every one. Its not always the answer.

But in this case it is.

......

Stewart often has someone drop him off where i am,then he walks where I can see him. Then he has them pick him up.

Lately I've honked at him and given him the bird. Just so he knows i see him and i still hate him and i will kill him.

Denise was driving today so i couldn't but i yelled my hate at him,anyways.

.....

Weird was when i got,to the gas station there was a black girl in the back seat of a red SUV with huge eyes like she was a victim of human trafficking. But I always see cops there. And all the Windows were down. IDK why people look like that. Last,time they were worrief about my tire. Windows were down some,dude was outside smoking. She could had screamed. She seemed to be the only one there,

Just a random thing.

------

I was really worried about him going through the,gate. Because they wantef me to sit where I was safe and could see through the fence. But i was super close to the gate and i could hear him within the outer fence. Theres like 4 fences and shit... So he was within the half yard where I was but outside of,the porch fence.

So trespassing. New Mexico law is i can fight back with an equal or lesser weapon. Since he uses needles... And I'm handicapped. I can use a broom, chair, table. Pretty much anything i want but a gun. I could use a knife cause they're close to needles. He uses insulin so a big butcher knife.. Since I'm diabetic ... Insulin won't bother me much but he does use extremely high doses which would cause me to pass out. So then i would be able to equalize that with a stun gun which i have, pepper spray which i have. And blood loss from a butcher knife will cause him to pass out.

Now here I'm not suppose to equalize his crime and kidnap him.

But since I know he wants to kill me, has kidnapped me, etc....

They asked me what i would say if he ends up missing.

I don't care. That was my answer. I don't fucking care. Ive been complaining about him for years.

He tried to kill me and my daughter Annie. Hes constantly harassing us. He follows us. There's records.

If i go through the trouble of disposing him. Dude. They already fucking know where he is. They fucking watch me. They can push rewind on the dam satellite,

So seriously. I go through the trouble of disposing him myself or with my family don't fucking say shit but thank you snd pay me a reward.

Call me,crazy but im fucking telling you. So PREVENT IT.

Or don't bother arresting me or asking where is currently 50 extra pound ass is.

Lets not play dumb, here. Get someone smarter than you if you don't understand, #FBI

Self defense. Hes a threat and has been. Hrs fucking crazier than me,

We all know i can go sociopath, psychopath, serial killer. I can do them all all day any day.

Yes he is crazier than me because he can't go sane.

And despite me sounding crazy. I am actually sane.

......

So. He is terrified of me. He asked me about a year ago to let him help me load my groceries on the black tread at the store. He was shaking like a leaf. I was PISSED because he came up behind me and squeezed next to me,to,get in front of me.

They're all he doesn't have his black bag!!!!! He wears a fanny pack to carry his insulin.

THATS WHAT I DONT GET.

hes scared yet he wants to kill me????

What the Hell. Stay away from me.

Then he will sit where he knows i should be able to see him and he eats candy and smiles all big showing his teeth like he just ate out some ones ass..

Telling me hes gonna have to have his needles out soon.

........

But they tell me he doesnt have his bag.

.....

He will and has tucked them under his dick on his nut sack. And pulled it out in front of me and my child.

.......

I will fucking kill him before he can get his stupid hands in his pants,

I do not fucking care.

Hes lucky i don't have a gun. Because h3 would already be dead.

That's why i don't have a gun.

I almost got one a few years ago.....

But i don't want to go to jail. So if he is close enough for me,to,touch on private property not belonging to him.

Hes a dead man.

........

Anyways so i was concerned for him to go thru the gate because I wasn't feeling the kill rage. So i felt like i wasn't ready so i was weary.

And i kept on although everything else was telling me,he wasn't but to my right,

So my left ear started buzzing like crazy and i was all fucking shut up i can't hear..

But duh. I didn't need to listen at the gate.

So god was there talking to me. Telling me he was there and ready to help me as i need.

To help me as i need.

Once i got the understanding then the buzzing quit.

And I knew to focus my ears to my right.

....

I wasn't alone and,had a lot of support and understanding from a legend. She was really awesome in being curious and understanding. It was pretty awesome. She has a clear and strong voice. I bet she will be a guardian angel one day and i know she will be awesome at it. I was starting to wonder if she was dead because she was so good.

She's not but yeah i was like whoa. I could trust her. Its unusual.

Just because she was awesome doesn't mean she's near death, its just an Earth skill.

I trust the dead most because they can go anywhere even under water.

And i felt i could trust her just as much as a spirit sent from Heaven.

.....

I can hear stewart again.

......

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