Big things happen often happen slowly, but they still happen.

I feel like I am taking a decidedly passive approach to transitioning. I am just kinda letting things happen. A part of me wishes changes from hrt were more obvious, that I would be forced out of the closet and forced to actually make an effort. But that would also be scary. I still have work to do before that point. Still working through electrolysis. Still procrastinating on voice training. Still enjoying the safety of doing the bare minimum.

Even if change comes in the end anyways, it is probably best to be less passive than the glacier if you can manage it.

You all are incredible.

You were able to help a friend and someone that's been a name in this community for a fair few years. You all gave me a way to help too. I even got to make a bunch of cool slimes and learn more blender in the process!

There is so much to be said and I don't have the words to say all of it. Just, thanks for helping Kayla out. Thanks for giving me an excuse to make slimes for a fair few of you. Thanks for letting me get more involved with this amazing community.

I would have been flattered to receive just one request. Thank you for surpassing that 10-fold.

You all are amazing.

The inadequacy beast has been rather taxing lately.

I design buildings for a living. There is quite a lot that goes into the design of a building and architecture school can be rather intense as a result. It isn't uncommon for a professor to literally tear your project apart. Really, I have seen models ripped in half. This doesn't instill a sense of worth in what is produced. Even when grades didn't reflect this harsh criticism, I still carried it. It was good motivation to keep improving, even though it came at the cost of my pride.

The work place is different from architecture school. Where before I would at least get a grade at the end of a project saying I did good, now I have nothing. I am spending every day working on projects I barely receive feedback on, never knowing if I am too slow or not good enough. Constantly feeling inadequate. Architecture school is fantastic at teaching someone to make a variety of pretty renderings and write words about them. (That's all these posts are.) It is less good at teaching the reality that no one can afford anything nicer than a box. That buildings are actually stupidly detailed. That I barely learned anything at all.

Topping off this mental mess is the trans problem. I'm already so scared of losing this job. I feel like I can't risk being myself. I can't afford to give anyone any reason to dislike me, even if they're ultimately in the wrong.

I would be far worse off without this artistic outlet. I'm glad I can at least get some cool art out of this stress.

@i-will-steal-all-your-spoons thank you for your donation to help Kayla out!

We appreciate your patience in getting this slime. Evidently we are understaffed, our one employee seems to be daylighting as an architectural designer. As if that would help get slimes to the masses. In any case, patience like yours is to be rewarded. We felt it would be fitting to provide you with an equally patient slime. It quite likes fishing and can do it forever. This is a good trait. Admittedly, it hasn't quite learned that fishing tends involve bait, or hooks, or nets... but it certainly has the spirit!

We hope that you provide this slime a good home, and perhaps a bathtub to fish in.

I haven't seen most of my family in quite some time. I think they prefer it this way.

They have never been ones to mince words or care what others think of them. They embrace their hatred. They see it as a way to view themselves above people like me. The last time I saw them it was like I wasn't even there. Just met with looks of disgust and occasional loud comments of "I identify as ___". I wasn't a person to them, just an object of their ire.

They are jerks. And yet, a part of me wishes I could somehow change their opinions a little bit. Cool their burning hatred to a more tepid strong dislike.

Your family is what you make it. Not the relatives you are born with, but instead the connections you make and lives you touch. I would be lying if I said this didn't hurt though. I wish things could be different.

Thank you @ralathehuntress for the incredible generosity from you all. I am certain Kayla is extremely thankful.

We believe we sourced the slimes that you all were looking for. Apologies about the delay, some were rather elusive. We are sure you can all guess which ones were a bit camera shy or uncooperative.

Lana was interested in a purple pony slime with a mask. This slime can be rather timid at times, but is also exceptionally caring. Ivy was interested in a green plant slime. This one has an affinity for cabbage and loves to bask in the sun. It'll be a friend to anyone that loves plants. Lizzie and Eddie had requested a blue bear type slime and a smaller red one. These two are a bonded pair and get along quite well. Even if they aren't talkative, they thoroughly enjoy each other's company. Evan had requested a clockwork slime. We aren't actually sure what this slime uses the gears for, but it does have a fascination with machinery. Sparkle requested a golden glowing slime. This one is sure to brighten up any space, it literally emits a bit of golden light. And lastly Crystal requested a punk slime full of personality. We will admit this slime is rather chaotic, we haven't actually seen it sit still longer than 5 seconds.

We hope that you all care for these slimes and we are sure they will care for you all in turn. Thank you for giving them a good home.

Sometimes it takes a friend to persuade you to live a little.

I really don't like drawing attention to myself in any capacity. So even though I loved the idea of painting my nails, it is also something that kinda terrified me. My friends are often more supportive of me than I am of myself, so they would try to encourage me to do more than nothing. One night I finally caved, drunk friends can be very persuasive. Painting your nails is such a small thing, and yet I enjoyed them just as much as I was anxious about having them. Which is to say I liked them a lot. Gender euphoria is a very rare feeling for me.

Unfortunately, I haven't painted my nails since. Shortly after this I had my architecture thesis presentation and graduation. I started working full time in an office not long after that.

I might be afraid of nothing. It might be perfectly fine for me to wear nail polish again. I don't know.

I just know that I miss it.

To me, transitioning feels like a long path with no clear destination.

Looking back it's obvious I have come a long way. My hair is well over a foot longer than it was 3 years ago. Even though I really need to gain weight, HRT is still working with what it can. The fully realized version of me I want to exist as feels so far away. I just hope I can make it there, regardless of how long it takes.

For many, this journey can be exceptionally isolating. Losing family is tough to experience. Growing apart from friends even when they're supportive isn't fun either. Can't exactly be "one of the guys" when it is increasingly obvious that you're no longer a guy.

Fortunately, this isn't a journey of complete isolation or doom and gloom. This is a fantastic community, I have already met so many incredible people during my travels. Even if the destination isn't clear, there are certainly highlights in the journey.

Take each day as it comes. Your horizons are vast and there's a whole world out there for you. I wish you all the best on your travels.

Thank you @sixfoothalfling for your generous donation to help Kayla!

You had requested a knightly green slime. We are not sure if this slime was formally knighted by a reigning monarch, but they seem to fit the role well. It appears they even have a pair of squires. As agreed, we will only provide you the one(1) slime. But we won't necessarily stop the squires from tagging along. It should also be noted that the slime's sword is rather blunt, but it is best to be cautious around it regardless.

Thanks again, and please take good care of your slime(s)!

If anyone else would like to adopt a slime, apply here! (please note the next order is quite large, so it might be some time until I can get to yours)

@sissychiara thank you for your donation to help Kayla!

You had requested a slime that was "a cute one :3 "

We believe we found a slime that meets that description. It seems to have an affinity for boxes, so we hope you don't mind the extra containers. Strangely, when packing it into one box, it would pop out of another. We weren't able to keep this cuteness well contained. We aren't sure if anyone can. Perhaps you will have better luck with your new companion.

Please take good care of your new slime!

If anyone else would like to adopt a slime, apply here!

To the incredibly kind soul that donated to help Kayla, thank you so much.

Much like you, this egg slime likes to remain hidden. Although it isn't quite as good as it as you. In fact, we can't seem to find your name in our records anywhere. In any case, we hope you find this large egg slime useful. The world can be scary and uncertain, especially if you're still figuring yourself out. Hopefully, with a giant slime by your side, it's a little less intimidating.

Enjoy your slime, and we wish you all the best on your journey ahead.

If anyone else would like to adopt a slime, apply here!

It is safe to say I've never actually liked how I look. There was just an overwhelming indifference to it all.

Before transitioning I felt a sort of twisted pride in this fact. It was a shield against vanity. After all, how could I be vain if I didn't care at all about my appearance?

A consequence of starting to care about myself is suddenly taking in interest in what I look like. Shocking, I know. In this regard, mirrors aren't fun. Neither are cameras. Friends and classmates found it hilarious when I would recoil when accidentally turning on my phone's front facing camera. I didn't find it quite as funny. Cameras are evil creatures. Anyways, back to mirrors.

I hope for a day where my relationship with them changes. It might be a long way off. But just imagine being able to look at your reflection with genuine pride. Imagine feeling things besides loathing and detachment.

Imagine looking at a mirror, and actually seeing yourself.

Thank you @millieindeed for your donation to help Kayla!

We are pleased to say we found a slime for you. Unfortunately we found it after it had already subsumed a great deal of cheese. We hope you are able to give it a good home and plenty of dairy based snacks. Hopefully you appreciate the gifts it provides in return. We would also like to extend our sincerest apologies if you are lactose intolerant.

Enjoy your cheese slime!

If anyone else would like to adopt a slime, apply here!

@deadeyedfae thank you so much for your donation & all that you are doing!

As requested here is your one (1) slime. Or at least it was one slime when we put it in the box. We are confident that two slimes won't be too much of a handful. Please note that your three slimes are rather social and quite like making new friends. So please do take good care of your four slimes.

Also, as a reminder we do not accept returns. Your [n(n+1)]/2 slimes are your responsibility now.

If anyone else would like to adopt a slime, apply here!

Even though you wish to remain anonymous, thank you so much for your donation!

This slime loves to blend in and stay hidden too. Supposedly, it can even change color! It doesn't see any reason to change from its favorite colors though. Instead, it prefers wearing a top hat to blend in. Truly it is indistinguishable from the average person. With that being said, we strongly suggest keeping it away from financial institutions. We imagine it would get up to all sorts of mischief there.

Please take good care of them!

If anyone else would like to adopt a slime, apply here!

@u-u-h thanks a bunch for your donation!

You had requested an angry slime that was purple in color. We believe we found one full of spirit! Despite fierce protest, we coaxed this one into a mostly intact box. We wish you all the best in taking care of it (you will certainly need it). Our lawyers also felt the need to emphasize that we are in no way responsible for injury or damages caused by this slime once it is in your hands, or more accurately, once your hands are in this slime.

It is your problem now. Best of luck!

If anyone else would like to adopt a slime, apply here!

@thatmutepony thank you so much for your donation! I am sure Kayla will appreciate it.

I believe I found a slime that suits your needs. This slime absolutely loves pillows, and is rather attached to this heart shaped one. They are well mannered and like to nap on soft things.

Please take good care of them.

If anyone else would like to adopt a slime, apply here!