You have to recognize your capacity for harm. You cannot omit the harm you've done to others to remain "good." Anybody can be a bigot. Anyone can be an abuser. Anyone can harm anyone at any time even those who have been harmed themselves. The world is not made up of victims and villains only, this is life, not a Saturday morning cartoon and you are a human being who can or maybe even has hurt others and you HAVE to acknowledge that to learn to be better.
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GhostGaz Week - friendly competition // an honest mistake
@ghostgazweek
Simon’s lips are firm, but startlingly gentle. The hand he has on Kyle’s jaw tips his head just so, and he barely stifles a groan as Simon’s tongue teases against his bottom lip. The rumble of contentment he lets out shakes Kyle down to his bones. Whatever sound pushes past his lips at that must be what Simon’s looking for, though, because he deepens the kiss to something filthy. It’s everything Kyle’s ever imagined and more.
He just wishes he knew why they were kissing.
“Wait, wait,” Kyle says, when Simon’s other hand drifts down. He chokes as Simon’s thumb swipes over the fly of his jeans. “Wait, Simon, what’s going on?”
“Kissin’ m’ boyfriend.” The words, between pecks against the edge of Kyle’s jaw, set off alarm bells.
“Your what?”
That makes Simon lean back to meet his eyes. He looks hungry. “Whatever you like, love.”
Kyle rewinds the evening in his head. Unfortunately, he’s lost. “Huh?”
“You don’t like the word, we can use another one,” Simon says, patiently. He tips Kyle’s face up some more. “Mm. Y’re pretty, you know that?”
“Since when are you interested in dating me?”
Kyle’s never seen genuine confusion on Simon’s face before. It’s fascinating. After a beat, Simon says, “Since… you keep touching me? And holding my hand? And stealing my drinks? And we went on a date?”
On a what? “I don’t follow.”
“Which part?”
“All of it. Start from the beginning.”
“You touch me, all the time. Hold my hand at the bar and color in my tattoos,” Simon breathes, with a kiss to his eyebrow. “Tickled at first, but it’s nice, now. You wasn’t letting me finish a drink without drinkin’ half of it. And then we went on a date last Thursday.”
A bolt of realization makes Kyle’s jaw drop. “The new Thai spot? That was a date?”
Something about that makes Simon untangle them and take two steps back before Kyle can even register there’s something wrong. And there is something wrong. The man’s shoulders jump up to his ears as his hands dive into the pockets of his jacket. He hasn’t looked so fucking uncomfortable around Kyle since they met at the shop, years ago.
“Fuck, I’m sorry.” He avoids Kyle’s eyes as he talks. “I just… I guess I read the signs wrong.”
“Hey, no.” It’s a relief when Simon let’s himself be reeled a step closer, but he still avoids looking at Kyle directly. “’M sorry, that’s my bad. Soap and I were betting on who could get away with annoying you longest.”
“Right,” Simon says, and it should be impossible for such a large man to look so small. “Not flirting. Sorry.”
Feeling like a complete heel, Kyle reaches into Simon’s pocket to wrap his fingers around his wrist. “No, hey, Simon, don’t run away from me. ‘M always flirting with you.”
“It’s fine. It’s friend flirting. I get it.”
“Stealing your beer might have been friend flirting,” Kyle admits. He takes deep breath and lets it out before adding, “But bringing you pasties in the morning is just regular flirting.”
Simon’s lips press together, and he looks at Kyle from the corner of his eye. “You bring everyone something.”
“I bring you and Cap tea since Johnny and I stop for coffee in the mornings,” Kyle corrects with a smirk, reeling Simon a half-step closer. “But you’re the only one who gets food. Don’t I get your favorite?”
Cautiously, Simon settles one shoulder on the wall next to Kyle. “Yeah.”
“I didn’t think you were interested in me.” Kyle shrugs, gestures vaguely at the space between them. “I just thought you liked people touching you, just as friends. You hug Cap and wrestle with Johnny all the time.”
“I don’t mind Cap and Johnny,” Simon confesses with a soft smile. His shoulders relax a bit, and he looks less like he’ll punch through the bottoms of his pockets. “But I like when you touch me. You have nice hands. And you smell nice.”
“You notice my cologne?” Kyle wraps his fingers in the strings of Simon’s hoodie and reels him back into his space. He smirks as he tips his face up again. “I was trying to find one you’d like.”
He watches Simon’s pupils dilate, just a little. “I always notice. You wore a new one to the Thai place. Liked it.”
Kyle presses a quick kiss to the divot in Simon’s chin. “I had a really nice time on Thursday.” He catches the corner of Simon’s lips with his own. “And I like holding your hand and drinking your beer.”
“You could drink less of my beer.”
Kyle grins. “Can I kiss my boyfriend?”
“Yeah,” Simon breathes. He sighs, slotting his lips against Kyle’s. “You could do that.”
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