Hello Sarah- I am also an edged denial slut, and recently saw and loved your post from October about your job.I can't lie that the thought of you begging for your job so pathetic and needily and then winding up a free use office edgetoy really... inspired me and my Master. He gave me an assignment to write that humiliating email that I'd send to all my coworkers, announcing my new title as a Free Use Edge Slut. I wonder if you'd like to read it- and either way, thanks for much for your blog <3

Absolutely!!

I really needed to get to sleep early tonight was so tired but after dinner Rose fell asleep with her head on my chest snuggling on the couch trapping me there so I couldn't get to bed without waking her and I felt so in love being close to her and watching her sleep I wouldn't trade that hour for six hours of sleep ❤️❤️❤️🩷❤️🩷❤️❤️🩷🩷💞💖❤️🩷❤️💖💞🩷❤️💖💞🩷

If It Pleases You

Ah, so in addition to Megan, Rose's F-cup single ex girlfriend Connie, who Rose really wanted to invite, has confirmed she will be at the wedding.

So there will be two women in the crowd and at the reception who my fiancee has fucked - both while she and I were together - both of whom have better tits than mine - both of whom will be present at the wedding venue when she and I are mingling with guests - both of whom will have plenty to show off and for her to enjoy without begging the dress maker to put at least a little padding in the chest -

Why can't I stop thinking about both of them doing toasts at the wedding and then spitting in my drink and kissing Rose while I drnk it

(bonus points for anyone who gets the post title reference <3)

How should girls like me edge?

I think this is my first poll ever? I don't know, for some reason this question popped into my head this morning and I couldn't stop thinking about it. I'd love to hear people's thoughts in the comments, I feel like these are all really different.

I do feel like the amount of training I've done to instinctively open my mouth might make some of the options really hard :D

What makes orgasm denial worth it for you? I'm really trying to understand because I can't imagine a scenario in which I don't get to come without being homicidal about it.

I’ve been mulling this over. I don’t know anything about you, so I can put it in terms that would speak uniquely to you. I am speaking from my perspective, maybe you can relate.

You’ve been making yourself orgasm for a long time. You know the best way to do it the quickest and most deliciously. Maybe a cheeky edge or two first, but then you’re cumming hard and your vision’s blurring and you’re feeling high. Maybe you’re feeling great and you’re done…or you go for a second, a third, a seventh. Then when you can barely feel your clit anymore, you clean yourself up and move onto the next thing. You’re calm, satisfied, and the queen of your castle.

Or, you’ve just finished playing with your partner. They’ve made sure to spend time on you, ensuring you can orgasm, before their time with you is done. You know that this is the right way, because your pleasure matters just as much as theirs of course. You deserve to be satisfied just as much as they do. What’s the point otherwise?

What is orgasm to you, then? Satiation, pleasure, plenty, relief, the agency to close the activity and move on with your day. What does your possession of and entitlement to orgasm give you? Equality, power, freedom, dignity, satisfaction, self possession. It means you’re deserving. It means things are fair. It means your pleasure matters and that sex was a give and take experience. If someone thought otherwise, you would say with pride, “No, of course I deserve to orgasm too. Why would it be any different for me?”

I used to be you.

If you’ve been following me for any period of time, you might know that I enjoy power exchange, but that it’s taken me a considerable amount of time to bring it from kinky escapades in bed to a lifestyle commitment. It’s always been hot as hell to me, but it’s difficult to do in practice. Why? Because it’s exceptionally difficult to hand over things you really value - things that you tie to your sense of self possession and dignity - to another person.

When someone asks to take your orgasm from you (or tells you to sacrifice it at their altar, consent pending), they’re taking those intangibles you’ve attached to it, too. That seems exaggerated but you know it’s true when your cheeks flush hot with the indignation. You feel pinpricks of fear, embarrassment, that you’re considering saying yes (or not safewording). How could I possibly agree to this?! It’s not fair!! How dare they even suggest it? I’d feel homicidal if I wasn’t allowed to cum. That unsettled feeling in your gut is right; it isn’t fair, not even one bit. Well, it wouldn’t be fair if you were equal to them, right? Maybe you’re not, come to think of it, or wouldn’t you have said no already? Are you really upset about the prospect or are you worried you wouldn’t be able to do it? Couldn’t bear it? You never considered it before as your orgasm belonged to you. Past tense. You were once the queen of your castle, but someone has moved in and said “I’ll take it from here, don’t you worry your pretty little head. Just do as I say and I will make everything better.” Your stomach flips as you find yourself saying Yes. But then you feel so good! How could you not, seeing them beam with happiness at your gift. God they seem so happy (turned on) that you’re giving this to them. They promise it will make you feel better - “I mean consider how much more explosive your release will feel when you’ve been edged a few times! And it’ll help your stamina for when we want to have sex later in the day.” That doesn’t seem too bad. It even seems reasonable. They are very pleased with you and you’re so very fond of them. You can do this! It might be fun, like a tease.

You feel your dignity being picked apart with each denial, with every single capricious “no.” An orgasm after a few edges becomes none at all by the end of sex. They orgasm, satisfied, while you ache for more. You’re frustrated, fired up. “Well I’ll probably want to fuck you later, so this will keep you nice and tense until then. When we have sex later, it’ll feel amazing.” You think about saying no, but you’ve agreed to hand over this autonomy. You’re trying to show trust in this game…It feels wrong, but for some reason it makes your cunt wet. Yes, you can’t deny it makes your cunt wet. And the reasoning is sound. The next time will feel more intense, it’s true. You are hornier and things feel better if you don’t get to follow through and cum. You assent, pushing through the brain fog you’ve been feeling more and more lately, to get back to your day. When they leave you denied like this, sometimes it’s difficult to think. They’ve said it’s okay for you to edge on your own, just not cum. In fact they encourage it! It’s good practice. Maybe a few edges will help clear the fog. Maybe. Did it help? Not sure. Maybe a few more will help. Yes, later the sex and the orgasm are AMAZING. They were so right. So so right. Silly you for not trusting their guidance on this.

You notice, edged out and frustrated, that it’s been a few days since they’ve let you finish. In fact, they used to let you rub and cum when you gave head, as a give and take, but now they said you could only edge! What is this? You feel like you’re going crazy. (And edging yourself out a few times a day to try to stop the aching is not seeming to help.) You tell them that it’s been nearly a week without relief. They smile and pull you into an embrace, stroking your hair. “Of course there’s been relief, I’ve finished lots of times thanks to your fantastic mouth and cunt. Silly. Fucking you is perfection, especially with your new training. I’m so lucky to have you. You’re so pent up that you do such an amazing job. Your cunt is so wet every time I want to fuck you and your head skills are getting even better. I’m so proud of your progress; the longer you’re denied, the better you get! I’m so satisfied, I’ve never been more satisfied.” You glow with the praise. How could you not? You’re so deeply fond of them, maybe you can manage a little while longer. You won’t give up!

It’s been weeks since you’ve last orgasmed. Maybe a month? You’re edging every day now. You can’t help it. You feel the high of sexual tension throbbing at the back of your mind all the time, sometimes bullying out critical thought. Your mind is foggy but it’s comforting somehow. The only issue is the hunger. You feed it more and more sexual depravity but the hunger doesn’t fade, it gets stronger. The hunger sends you to their side, begging. For what? Anything. You hang onto every word. They’re holding your orgasm for you, they’ve been making you better. Maybe they’ll help you. You can follow their lead, even if they make your status lower and lower. Their smiles reflect onto your face. You’re so glad you could please them like this, as you tell them you’ve been edging again today. This turns them on. They decide to use your body to cum, right then and there. They don’t want to pay attention to you at all, though, they just want to relax and masturbate using you - that’s alright isn’t it? I mean you’re not going to cum anyway. It’s just like them jerking off but you’re helping! You’re so helpful. They’ll just watch some porn and enjoy. You find yourself nodding, swallowing the tiny stash of pride you kept hidden away in case of emergencies. They finish. It feeds your hunger, it makes them happy. But the ache remains between your legs.

It’s been months now. You’re enjoying a gentle moment of intimacy. They’re stroking your hair, giving your body a sweet gentle massage. Every nerve ending is lit up with tension; you feel your cunt start to ache and drip just from their touch in desperate hope for stimulation. Their happiness these last few months has filled you with satisfaction, the satisfaction you’ve been missing from orgasm. That’s such an empty place inside you, willing and waiting to be filled to the brim with their satisfaction in your progress. You’re wishing to do more, to be more for them, to get that dose of their praise and fulfillment. You find yourself wishing they’d use you, just so you could feel something and bring them relief. Relief. Relief. Desperate to create relief, if not for you then for them. That’s enough, that’s the same thing isn’t it? It’s the same thing. Their pleasure is your pleasure. God. Please. You find yourself nuzzling at their crotch, drool starting to pool in your mouth, you look up at them with vacant eyes, brain hopelessly cloaked in fog. They allow you to serve. Their satisfaction pours into you, filling that endless pit they created. But you don’t suffer the lack of dignity anymore, you savor it. You just wonder what more you can do next.

Do you understand?

https://www.pornhub.com/view_video.php?viewkey=648a09bf24a4e https://www.pornhub.com/view_video.php?viewkey=6529af4250d90 https://www.pornhub.com/view_video.php?viewkey=654332bc1f77f

I'm so edged out these were amaaaaaaaaaaaazing I'm full dead htese are like my faaaaavorites this would fix me so much

(1)

0:08 they're cute 0:27 omg that predatory look 1:01 she's so thirsty 1:39 please please please she sounds just like me with women 1:57 YES just take what you want you're better 2:10 the way she pinned her arms 2?:23 she's in HEAT 2:47 those eyes are so drunk 3:11 yes I am 3:19 I wanna cum 3:40 her legs spread like that yes 3:53 that sound 3:57 please please pleasew pkease please 4:10 iI want her cum so bad 4:20 breeding bottom yes yes yes yes yes yes ts 4:38 my legs sprwead and propped up on my desk ready fpr it 4:59 so close 5:56 I drooled 6:11 so right so correct so good so perfect

(2)

I could just edge to the thumbnaill all day forever 0:35 bully gonna get beattt 1:27 oh 1:36 what a whore 2:01 dykebait 2:28 turned up the vibe 2:46 you're gonna regret that 3:05 she can't even get it ouyt 3:19 those legs spreading her body knows 3:51 beg bitch 4:14 "PLEASE" 5:05 oh my god 5:15 yes i will i will i will

(3)

0:17 yes yes 0:25 the power imbalance yes 0:30 she didn't even resist 0:45 that reaction 1:27 she's she's better she's better 1:39 baby wants to stay fuck her girlfriend 2:06 she's winning 2:18 thirsy bitch 2:27 OH GOD I screamed out loud holy fyck holy oh my god I paused the video 2:27 yes yes yes 2:27 so close my brain is dripping 2:27 I belong right there 2:27 edge 2:27 edge 2:27 does she even know she's vbeing recorded and sent would she even care 2:27 edge 2:29 those sounds 2:29 paused again 2:29 edge 2:30 HOLY paused again 2:30 bouncing gluck gluck on her cock 2:30 edge 2:34 paused again 2:34 she's looking right at the camera 2:34 edge 2:44 legs spread good girl 2:59 it's ilike she's asking permission 3:06 paused again 3:06 got dwn on the floor ass up for ten seconds 3:11 she's porn 3:16 paused 3:16 my brain is all gone 3:30 uhhhhhhhhhhh

thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank yyou thank you for choosing how i edge and edge and egde and edge and edge

my favorite

https://xhamster.com/videos/office-policy-xhwE7Kc

Thank you anon! This video is definitely not my thing which is why I'm so glad you've compelled me to edge to it. That shows I'm doing a good joAN HOUR?

Ah. Oh well. Here we go.

0:18 such nice tits 0:29 I love predsatory women that smile 0:55 I love unconscious womemn being felt up 2:12 exposed in front of all those cars <3 <3 2:26 I;m not into tied tits but this usn't about what I like it's about what u like 3:47 helpless helpless 4:32 no miss 4:47 I'll never know tat feeling 5:03 please take care of me too 5:15 so trained that's hgonna be u 5:39 yeah shut her up shut her up 5:59 gag me with them pls 6:37 yes yes yes shut up the bitch 7:51 they're porn 8:36 she was asking for it 9:22 I remember the feeling of screaming like that girls like us deserve it 10:16 night night dykebait 11:25 I wanna get slaapped like that so bad 11:54 I'm naked so often it feels normal for me but I bet for a stuck up bitch like her it feels extra humiliating 14:01 I could be her <3 14:42 I'm hitting mine too 15:04 I don't have any titties 15:24 turned up the vibe 15:40 "oh yesss, pull on those yes yes yes yes yes" 15:56 cry bitch 17:47 "do it harder" 18:20 I'm sorry I'm such a pussy 19:17 I love the flinch 19:35 I want to see her cry 20:42 just pose her by the nose 21:15 not done 21:45 such a whiny pathetic bitch 22:14 her crying will be so hot 23:25 god they could be a little grateful 24:13 I hope that homophobe likes the smell of pussy 24:49 I belong kneeling in there 25:38 tasted myself 26:20 oh I just notice the toe tit ropes 26:56 I wanna cum 27:02 yes degrading language for her tots she deserves it 28:40 lick it up 30:38 I love seeing porn sub girls look genuinelyt unhappy 31:07 lick lick lick 31:46 I want a remote shock collarso bad 32:12 she had one job 32:37 she's not a boss, she's porn 33:01 blackmail 34:50 I wanna cum 35:07 I moaned 35:22 losers don't deserve air 35:54 slapped myself 36:09 tasted myself 36:20 rubbed it on my face 36:50 not going to lie I rewound five times to watch her get spit on 36:50 and in slow motion 36:50 please spit on me 38:00 her tits look so abused 38:59 I hope I lose 39:50 I wanna cum she got to i can't believe I'm even less than her 41:08 this is what all lesbian employees deserve 43:05 yes YES tug it 43:36 they're so pathetic whining 44:06 I wanna get hit turned up the vibe 44:45 apologize 45:43 those adoring eyes 46:58 I'm a loser girl 46:59 I'm glad the small tit loser lost 48:10 I moaned 49:15 I taste so stupid 50:14 I gagged myself my panties for the rest of the video 51:10 "thank you" 52:25 what happened to that uppity cunt from the start of the video, huh? 53:20 they're porn 54:40 I bet she's so ready to take it out on her 55:07 girls hurting girls <3 57:58 lick lick 58:20 that's what she deserves for flauntiing her tits 59:45 OH 1:01:12 uhhhhhhhhhhhh 1:01:26 I WANT TO 1:01:53 I taste stupid 1:03:18 ex boss. Never gonna be respected again 1:04:00 seeing the focusing light feels so good 1:05:05 her face under an ass looks so right 1:06:00 cum like a lezzie boss 1:06:50 I'm drooling so much around my panties 1:07:20 dyke dyke dyke dyke dyke 1:08:40 I want it so bad 1:09:10 oh my god those eyes

Thank you for choosing how I edge.

I think it's a work from home and edge myself stupid and hope people send me their favorite porn for me to edge to since I don't deserve autonomy kind of day

Uhhh whoops I'm sure nobody heard that

But *god* do I wish people on this call would stop talking about numbers and

oops I literally stopped mid-sentence and just went "ummm" and sat there in silence until someone else completed my sentence

Good girls never mute their mic on their work zooms. If they hear your moan or bark, that's on you.

Good girls never mute their mic on their work zooms. If they hear your moan or bark, that's on you.

Today while I was getting dressed but still half naked, Rose walked into the bedroom with a pen and my election ballot, handed them to me, and indicated the signature box. I dutifully signed my blank ballot and handed it and the pen back to her. She smiled, gave me a snack on the ass, and went back to what she was doing as I finished getting dressed.

I'm gonna make such a good wife.

How I Engage with Misogyny

Tumblr provides me with a lot of misogynistic porn.

There's a lot going on in that sentence. Obviously, I have some influence over what blogs I'm following, what I Like (as a reminder, see my pinned post about my likes being public), etc. But there's also the algorithm, the lack of control over what people post or send me to edge to (again, pinned post). The trouble is I'm not a misogynist. I actually think women are amazing and worshipable and divine and so on. So what do I do?

I do what a lot of queer women on tumblr do: editing. In my mind, when I see a misogynistic caption of "women are..." or whatever, it becomes "I am...". I revel in my womanhood being something that makes me lesser, or a target, or prey, or etc. When I see something that says "men are superior", in my mind it becomes - well it depends on my mood :D - something sort of like "better people are superior".

And this editing is intoxicating. Because I'm using my own volition to recognize that this caption is about ME. It's targeting ME. Of course I know it isn't the case that "all women should edge and never cum and drool their brains onto their tits." That's only about a specific kind of woman. The kind that I am. And by the way, plenty of captions are aimed at submissive or weak men; again, we just edit that, because it's not about gender, it's about being less. And I'm less. That's what really matters about me.

There's a post that circulates around that says something to the effect of "if you're a woman reading this, slap yourself. If you're not sure if this post applies to you [a bunch of transphobic bullshit]". Obviously the transphobia in the post makes it really gross to encounter (why would you reblog something so blatantly transphobic oh wait that describes 40% of all misogynist writing on tumblr), but the underlying message is right. I don't slap myself just because I'm a woman; I do it because I'm the kind of woman who slaps herself when told to.

Title

Me and Megan sitting on the couch. Rose finishes work and comes over. She's wearing the clingy pants I bought for her that show off her ass. I also konw she's wearing the panties she first cucked me in because I saw her put them on that morning. She sits down next to Megan and swings her leg over her lap. Looking at me from behind her, she mouths, "kiss her". I look confused. She stares at my eyes, and again mouths, "kiss her."

So I do. I nuzzle my nose up against her cheek, kissing her lightly. Thinking about everything that's happened. She kisses back, hard, the woman who sleeps with my fiancee, who's been, who'd been, who's been my best friend for many years. Her hand slips down to my thigh, then between my legs. I flinch, but only a little. Rose starts squeezing her breasts. "I'd forgotten how good real breasts feel". She's panting, kissing more aggressively, touching more aggressively. Rose is staring at me kissing Megan every time I look up. Megan bites my lip. Rose's brushes mine down onto Megan's thigh. Megan shifts so it's between her legs instead, starts grinding against it. Kisses harder. Cums. Again. Again. Again. Biting my lip. Rose is watching, smiling. She puts her hand down Megan's shirt.

Afterwards, I buy dinner. When I get back, Megan has moved to my spot. I sit in the wet spot on the couch. We eat dinner, and Rose and Megan get in the car and drive away, three hours before Megan's flight.

She's here

She's staying the whole weekend. Why do I feel weirdly way more compelled than usual to kinda how Rose suggests a threesome? Is there some healing I would derive from it?

It's been a few months, how is Sarah doing? cw SA, addiction, family health issues, bigotry.

Fair warning: this isn't a sexy post. We'll try to get back to those when we can.

So first things first, I went off denial in November, meaning my 2023 denial period was about eight months of edging, teasing, serving, and zero orgasms. I'm really happy about it, it was fun and made me feel good, and I met tons of wonderful people in the community. I don't know when I'll next start medium-term denial again but I hope I get a chance to.

Anyways, I stopped in November because I had just so much going on personally that it was impossible to devote the energy and wound-up tension that denial creates in me to its practice. Work became more and more stressful. I was "promoted" at work, taking on responsibility for over twice as many people and deliverables, and was given no raise and also a new manager between me and my previous manager, who I had to train in addition to my new responsibilities. In addition, a close family member started radiation treatment for cancer. For the first time in my life, I didn't visit my family for the holidays, because political developments have made it unsafe for me to travel to where they live.

And then Megan assaulted me.

I was sharing a hotel bed with her - as friends - and woke up on the last day in the morning feeling her fingers groping me. I didn't know what to do, I froze and kept my eyes closed and waited for my alarm to go off and got up and went to work and then flew home. The next couple days are kind of a blur. I relapsed into a finsub addiction and sent a bunch of money to someone. I think Rose and I might have had sex that next day but I'm kind of not sure. I ended up talking to Megan about it a few days later.

"No, I didn't do that. I wasn't groping you. That didn't happen."

I told Rose about what happened. I was extremely nervous and also felt so stupid because all the tropes around women like me were playing out. I had imagined it. I had done something to lead her on. I was making a huge deal out of some minor petting. I was going to lose a friend over something that wasn't worth losing them over. I was going to blow up Rose's relationship with Megan and she wouldn't get to fuck my hotter friend anymore and it would be. My. Fault.

Eventually, things have cooled off a little. I talked to Rose and we made each other feel better. I talked to Megan and explained that I don't know or care why she thinks it didn't happen, but I think it did, and it can never happen again. Rose is still going to fuck Megan because she's hotter than me. Megan is still going to come stay at my apartment for several days this weekend. I'll probably be kicked out to the guest room while they fuck in the master bedroom.

I'm still struggling with the addiction relapse, and feeling guilty and sad about the really good friendships I made here during denial that I've been too messed up to maintain, and whether I still have value as a girl not in denial. But I trust that things heal with time. And nothing - *nothing* - is going to take away from the fact that Rose is going to *marry me* this year. Even with everything that's happened I'm the luckiest girl in the world.

I'll post some more soon, I hope.

xoxo Sarah

Wow it has Really been a Tough Couple Months.

To all the friends here I haven't had the energy to engage with, I hope you're doing well, forgive me, and are still around when things get better. ❤️❤️

Happy holidays! If you're a girl like me make sure to have at least one (1) holiday visit with your family to get a refill on your daddy issues to last you all of next year. Your audience will thank you for it.