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shoutout to flags that look like landscapes fr gotta be one of my favorite genders
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my chemical romance is literally a band
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ARMANDANIEL REAL (PROBABLY) I WIN
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My one friend group can't stop saying, "See you in hell!" in a cheerful voice instead of, "Talk to you later!" and my other friend group can't stop calling things "penis" instead of "cool" or "good", so I just unironically uttered the phrase, "Sounds penis, see you in hell," as I got off the phone.
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they’re gonna rip up your heads
your aspirations to shreds
ANOTHER COCK IN THE MURDER MACHINE!!!!
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*walks up to the president* not to be rude, but my huge cock thinks you should kill yourself
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IM WEARING HIS BOXERS IM BEING A GOOD WIFE WE WONT BE TOGETHER BUT MAYBE THE NEXT LIFE I NEED HIM LIKE WATER HE LIVES ON A LANDSLIDE I CRY IN HIS BATHROOM HE TURNS OF THE BIG LIGHT IM BEING THE COOL GIRL IM KEEPING IT SO TIGHT I CARRY HIM HOME WHILE MY FRIENDS HAVE A GOOD NIGHT I NEED HIM LIKE WATER HE THINKS THAT IM ALRIGHT IM NOT FEELING HUMAN I THINK HES A GOOD GUY BUT ITS COMPLEX ITS A COMPLEX
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I love all the avatars who are like “the Eye is silly and I’m not afraid of it or it’s power” and then immediately go “but you’re a silly little man and just for that, I’m gonna tell you my entire life story.”
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turned this in for my biology assignment today online school is going well
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ever since i was a little girl i've always wanted a hysterectomy
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Never understood the collective vehement resentment of small talk lol i hate the painful grind of small talk as much as the next person but i think id rather shrivel up and die than be denied nuggets of joy found in standing in an elevator and having a middle aged woman compliment my nails or bonding fleetingly with a cafegoer over the city's temperamental weather it's so integral to nurturing & cultivating the soul i think
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i went to a store the other day that said “service animals welcome” on the door and like,
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i love you imani hakim instagram stories
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RAHHHH imso normal
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Where is the link to your songs. I lost it :(
SONGS!!
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died and came back exactly the same but something was so so so wrong with me before and now I have an excuse to really lean into it
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never ask a woman her age a man his salary your mutual how late it is in her timezone when she starts posting about that bisexual man
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died and came back wrong and no one could tell the difference
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