tumblr are you telling me something

(english butler voice) Will you be making an attempt on your life this evening, sir?

the idealized version of my tomorrow self will fix this

not necessarily universal, but from personal experience

he doesn't realize she's trans yet lol

My three girlfriends. And yes, they smoke weed.

iM LAUGHING LIKE A MANIAC MY RAT JUST WENT INSIDE MY BROTHER’S TOY CAR AND SAT IN THE FRONT SEAT

reading this deposition that just got dropped where someone sued musk and ohhhh my god it is this funniest thing ever . i can see why his lawyer tried to keep this confidential . they’re both maybe the biggest idiots . this is like ace attorney

finding it really hard to believe that this person has ever smoked a cigarette before

edible hasnt hit yet but i did chase it with a biiiiiiiig sandwich

we must imagine sisyphus transitioning