rapports-de-combat
Rapports de Combat de Montebello et de Dalmatie
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Lannes laughs in clear disbelief. When he speaks, his tone is low and sharp. He's always swung between hot and cold, bright cheerfulness and dark melancholy.
Hah! hell? buddy youre really taking the whole boat here.
you, hell?
we all deserve to go to hell, mes amis.
except for duroc.
He glances at Duroc with a grin. There's a slight crack at the edge of his mouth. It might not have been there before.
im not one for hiding things, your right, but nobody needs to see me fall apart in front of them. y'all dont need to see that shit.
anyway. your a lutin or diablotin huh? or somethin' worse? thats nice.
honestly the trouble you think youd cause cant be as bad as some of the shit everyone else is gettin up to. bessie's technically the reason duroc's hands exploded. everyone's girls. murat got mind controlled by an evil crystal and then it fucked up soult and his adc.
wait duroc this place must get pretty crowded with... murat and bessie and marmont all fuckin around here!
anyway.
so whats hell like?
He obviously doesn't believe in what Marmont is saying.
HEY DUROC HAVE YOU HEARD
EVERYONES TURNING INTO GIRLS I DID FOR A FEW DAYS IT WAS FUN BUT I TURNED BA-
OH LA FUCK
Youre a gonzesse!
and marmonts a goat! hey buddy havent seen ya around!
— @armagnac-army
E-Eh... Hi Lann-
OH MY GOD, IS THAT YOU LAN-MAN...?!?!?!?
For a moment, Marmont looks all exited to see... a friend, but then he suddenly freezes and tries to hide away, only to be in vain.
Uh... Y-Yes but...! Afterlife! He he he...! Ha...!
It's... good to see ya!!!
I was just uh... hangin', 'round 'ere, y'know?
You look fresh as ever, buddy!!!
As Lannes could notice, a tail would be wagging behind Marmont in a exited way. It was black and thin, and whose tip resembled a spade/pike.
And indeed, I'm a goat, or... most likely, THE G.O.A.T!!! HEHEHE HAHA!!
Eh...
Who I am kidding, obviously you are...
And I'm not.
#(( you're taking the boat = you're pulling my leg = you gotta be kidding according to french wiktionary ))#(( considered having lannes reveal his true form here but nah ))#(( you gotta prod him a bit more ))#askgeraudduroc#thread: catching up with hellion friends#rapport d’action du duc de montebello
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Iɴᴛᴇʀɴᴀʟɪsᴇᴅ Cᴀᴛɢɪʀʟ Mɪsᴏɢʏɴʏ Tʜɪs Is Rᴇᴀʟʟʏ Gᴇᴛᴛɪɴɢ Oᴜᴛ Oғ Hᴀɴᴅ
previous ( 1, 2, 3, 4 )
·—·—·—·—·—·—·—·—·—·—·
"I ... didn't mean to go that far. I didn't know that this would happen." —@your-dandy-king
"Are you...alright now?" —@perdicinae-observer
"Davout… Davout? What? Qu’est-ce que c’est ce merdier?! Why are you all women?!" —@le-brave-des-braves
·—·—·—·—·—·—·—·—·—·—·
Instead of commenting on the situation, instead of addressing the confused Ney or the regretful Murat or Davout trying to calm the situation, Bessières turns to Soult's ADCs.
Bessières: I- I strongly advise that one of you fetch your marshal right now.
He points at Brun, who salutes and runs off.
Turning back to the chaos, he opens his mouth to say something, but instead he coughs, splutters. Plumes of light grey smoke fall from his mouth, flecked with light orange cinders.
He attempts to pull himself up straight, attempts to pretend that everything is fine. He needs to rest.
Bessières: Let us- *cough* - let us- sit down and- ex-
He can't get the rest of the words out as he is overtaken by a deep and painful coughing fit. If Murat will let him, he will, perhaps unconsciously, lean on her.
·—·—·—·—·—·—·—·—·—·—·
(( @alexanderfanboy..? ))
#rapport d’action du duc d'istrie#thread: internalised catgirl misogyny#le-brave-des-braves#perdicinae-observer#your-dandy-king#alexanderfanboy
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Immediately at this moment, four ADCs burst in through the door, drawn by shouting and chaos. Two of them appear to be women. They immediately see Levavasseur kissing a very male Ney.
A tall-ish lady with short ash-blonde hair starts clapping loudly. The other lady, shorter and skinnier with messy stringy curly hair, also starts clapping and shouting woooo! After a moment’s hesitation, Petiet and Brun also join in.
(( @your-dandy-king || @perdicinae-observer || @le-brave-des-braves || Bessieres’ full reaction will be detailed next post of mine ))
Iɴᴛᴇʀɴᴀʟɪs���ᴅ Cᴀᴛɢɪʀʟ Mɪsᴏɢʏɴʏ Wʜᴀᴛ Tʜᴇ Fᴜᴄᴋ Is Gᴏɪɴɢ Oɴ
previous ( 1, 2, 3 )
·—·—·—·—·—·—·—·—·—·—·
"I assume no one has informed you of our current...peculiar predicaments?" —@perdicinae-observer
"You. Stupid. Connard. Your indulgence in self pity costed that poor kind soul Duroc his arms. You endangered half of the marshalate. What were you even thinking?! Were you even thinking you stupid useless piece of shit?" —@le-brave-des-braves
"DONT WHACK YOU WHACK FUCKING WHACK DARE WHACK HURT WHACK HIM WHACK WHACK WHACK WHACK IWILLKILLYOU!" —@your-dandy-king
·—·—·—·—·—·—·—·—·—·—·
As Ney slaps Bessières, what looks like smoke puffs out from where her hand makes contact. He staggers back, clutching his face, eyes wide, pizza boxes falling to the floor. His hand reaches under his cloak, but before he can respond-
A tall beautiful Amazonian woman starts committing violence apparently on his behalf.
Bessières takes one moment to take this in, before anger and chivalry force his hand. He pulls out his saber and raises it, intending to draw people's attention- but as he does so, his cloak flutters open, revealing that his body...
He is dressed in the green and red uniform of the colonel of the Chasseurs à cheval de la Garde impériale, yes, but it seems he is in danger of evaporating with wisps of dark smoke and small red embers emanating from his body. What look like indistinct smokey words write themselves across his form, words of regret and intimacy and anxiety. And, around all of that, he appears to be held together by an unnaturally long golden chain wrapped around his torso, ending in a closed pocketwatch dangling over his heart.
Bessières: Stop this madness right now!
His eyes catch the light, and the usually polite and reserved man's voice is loud and animated with offense and disbelief. Though whether he can be heard over the fight is hard to say.
Bessières: I don't know what is going on but I do know that I can very well defend myself or seek my own satisfaction, Mada-
And then he suddenly is struck by an awful realisation. What is it that the quiet lady with the glasses said about being "fellow marshals" and "peculiar predicaments"? There is only one marshal who wears glasses.
Bessières: ... Davout?
... Ney?
... JOACHIM MURAT..?!
Petiet: What should we do..?!
Brun: ... Normally I'd say we get the marshal but the Maréchale was rather insistent they do not be disturbed.
Lameth: We either eat popcorn or we disappear, I say~ And I am feeling rather curious about what would happen if one of us read that strange magical letter!
Saint-Chamans: Let's go look at the letter and leave the big hats to sort themselves out!
#rapport d’action des adcs de dalmatie#long post#perdicinae-observer#le-brave-des-braves#your-dandy-king
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There is shouting, and Bessières turns his gaze away to see a dying man.
The type of spirit that he, Lannes and Soult, and some of those who serve under them, the thing that they are- the ̸͖̌̄g̴̢̈́e̷̥̭̣̺̐̒̿ṉ̴̠̉̽ì̵̙̂̓ư̴̢͉̈́̕ś̸̜̒ ̶̥̦̖͑̈́̊͋f̸̠̭̝̀͋͘ạ̷̙̱̜̔ç̵̛̣͎͆̑t̸͖̗͎̏̈̆i̸̧̟̪̰͋͒- can very well break and fade away. Other kinds of spirits and beings in the varied afterlives have ways of dispersing and destroying them - but many are immortal. This is something that he's faced with, on his travels chasing after the Enemy.
He does not know if this is a false death or if this is the death that rules over death. From the way that Ney's ADC is acting, it may be the latter, or it may be that he does not know.
But he had intended to draw blood and perhaps cause that final death himself, if the redheaded stranger who had turned out to be Ney had not apologised, if Murat had not stepped in.
Bessières watches and draws his cloak closer to him, covering his smoke and his sins, only the chain around his neck visible out of the chains that bind him together.
Bessières: Murat... If this is a final death... you will be responsible.
He says this simply and without emotion, a vast contrast from what he had shown just now.
·—·—·
Meanwhile...
Saint-Chamans: Wow it's so squishy- wait, what's all that shouting? Isn't that where we left the big hats?
·—·—·
(( @perdicinae-observer || @le-brave-des-braves || @your-dandy-king ))
Iɴᴛᴇʀɴᴀʟɪsᴇᴅ Cᴀᴛɢɪʀʟ Mɪsᴏɢʏɴʏ Wʜᴀᴛ Tʜᴇ Fᴜᴄᴋ Is Gᴏɪɴɢ Oɴ
previous ( 1, 2, 3 )
·—·—·—·—·—·—·—·—·—·—·
"I assume no one has informed you of our current...peculiar predicaments?" —@perdicinae-observer
"You. Stupid. Connard. Your indulgence in self pity costed that poor kind soul Duroc his arms. You endangered half of the marshalate. What were you even thinking?! Were you even thinking you stupid useless piece of shit?" —@le-brave-des-braves
"DONT WHACK YOU WHACK FUCKING WHACK DARE WHACK HURT WHACK HIM WHACK WHACK WHACK WHACK IWILLKILLYOU!" —@your-dandy-king
·—·—·—·—·—·—·—·—·—·—·
As Ney slaps Bessières, what looks like smoke puffs out from where her hand makes contact. He staggers back, clutching his face, eyes wide, pizza boxes falling to the floor. His hand reaches under his cloak, but before he can respond-
A tall beautiful Amazonian woman starts committing violence apparently on his behalf.
Bessières takes one moment to take this in, before anger and chivalry force his hand. He pulls out his saber and raises it, intending to draw people's attention- but as he does so, his cloak flutters open, revealing that his body...
He is dressed in the green and red uniform of the colonel of the Chasseurs à cheval de la Garde impériale, yes, but it seems he is in danger of evaporating with wisps of dark smoke and small red embers emanating from his body. What look like indistinct smokey words write themselves across his form, words of regret and intimacy and anxiety. And, around all of that, he appears to be held together by an unnaturally long golden chain wrapped around his torso, ending in a closed pocketwatch dangling over his heart.
Bessières: Stop this madness right now!
His eyes catch the light, and the usually polite and reserved man's voice is loud and animated with offense and disbelief. Though whether he can be heard over the fight is hard to say.
Bessières: I don't know what is going on but I do know that I can very well defend myself or seek my own satisfaction, Mada-
And then he suddenly is struck by an awful realisation. What is it that the quiet lady with the glasses said about being "fellow marshals" and "peculiar predicaments"? There is only one marshal who wears glasses.
Bessières: ... Davout?
... Ney?
... JOACHIM MURAT..?!
Petiet: What should we do..?!
Brun: ... Normally I'd say we get the marshal but the Maréchale was rather insistent they do not be disturbed.
Lameth: We either eat popcorn or we disappear, I say~ And I am feeling rather curious about what would happen if one of us read that strange magical letter!
Saint-Chamans: Let's go look at the letter and leave the big hats to sort themselves out!
#thread: internalised catgirl misogyny#rapport d’action du duc d'istrie#long post#perdicinae-observer#le-brave-des-braves#your-dandy-king
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Iɴᴛᴇʀɴᴀʟɪsᴇᴅ Cᴀᴛɢɪʀʟ Mɪsᴏɢʏɴʏ Wʜᴀᴛ Tʜᴇ Fᴜᴄᴋ Is Gᴏɪɴɢ Oɴ
previous ( 1, 2, 3 )
·—·—·—·—·—·—·—·—·—·—·
"I assume no one has informed you of our current...peculiar predicaments?" —@perdicinae-observer
"You. Stupid. Connard. Your indulgence in self pity costed that poor kind soul Duroc his arms. You endangered half of the marshalate. What were you even thinking?! Were you even thinking you stupid useless piece of shit?" —@le-brave-des-braves
"DONT WHACK YOU WHACK FUCKING WHACK DARE WHACK HURT WHACK HIM WHACK WHACK WHACK WHACK IWILLKILLYOU!" —@your-dandy-king
·—·—·—·—·—·—·—·—·—·—·
As Ney slaps Bessières, what looks like smoke puffs out from where her hand makes contact. He staggers back, clutching his face, eyes wide, pizza boxes falling to the floor. His hand reaches under his cloak, but before he can respond-
A tall beautiful Amazonian woman starts committing violence apparently on his behalf.
Bessières takes one moment to take this in, before anger and chivalry force his hand. He pulls out his saber and raises it, intending to draw people's attention- but as he does so, his cloak flutters open, revealing that his body...
He is dressed in the green and red uniform of the colonel of the Chasseurs à cheval de la Garde impériale, yes, but it seems he is in danger of evaporating with wisps of dark smoke and small red embers emanating from his body. What look like indistinct smokey words write themselves across his form, words of regret and intimacy and anxiety. And, around all of that, he appears to be held together by an unnaturally long golden chain wrapped around his torso, ending in a closed pocketwatch dangling over his heart.
Bessières: Stop this madness right now!
His eyes catch the light, and the usually polite and reserved man's voice is loud and animated with offense and disbelief. Though whether he can be heard over the fight is hard to say.
Bessières: I don't know what is going on but I do know that I can very well defend myself or seek my own satisfaction, Mada-
And then he suddenly is struck by an awful realisation. What is it that the quiet lady with the glasses said about being "fellow marshals" and "peculiar predicaments"? There is only one marshal who wears glasses.
Bessières: ... Davout?
... Ney?
... JOACHIM MURAT..?!
Petiet: What should we do..?!
Brun: ... Normally I'd say we get the marshal but the Maréchale was rather insistent they do not be disturbed.
Lameth: We either eat popcorn or we disappear, I say~ And I am feeling rather curious about what would happen if one of us read that strange magical letter!
Saint-Chamans: Let's go look at the letter and leave the big hats to sort themselves out!
#rapport d’action du duc d'istrie#rapport d’action des adcs de dalmatie#thread: internalised catgirl misogyny#long post#perdicinae-observer#le-brave-des-braves#your-dandy-king
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Lannes is a little surprised when Duroc lifts him up, seeing as Lannes is, for reasons, denser and heavier than he used to be, in life. Shit, those flowers really pepped him up, didn’t it.
Jesus mary and joseph dude is higher than a cannonball fucking a bird
you okay there pal
dont break your hands again!!
Anyway @trauma-and-truffles doc you know i talk to that asshole soult bout the shits thats goin on with our shared afterlife but seein this, it might be a good idea to investigate what we all are, whats the difference between what we are, that kinda shit
since youre interested in trying to fix us up even now were all dead
Also boss
will ya be stickin around or do i need to come to your place to say hi and catch up?
(( @trauma-and-truffles || @askgeraudduroc ))
The Recovery of Geraud Christophe Michel Duroc
...That is the uncertain part. While this book is meant to talk about fairies, the character isn't medical at all.
But...! From what we could gather in the dubious information, I think that, just by being in presence of flowers, will be enough to at least accelerate his regeneration.
Do you... perhaps have a... considerable amounts of them? If not, i could sugest bringing Duroc to my garden... Even thought, It would be preferable if we took him in the carriage.
Napoleon's calm and gentle attitude was getting quite... unsettling.
Meanwhile, Duroc would stare at Lannes, giving him a rather listless smile.
If you say so, It should be true...! But Bessieres still has to... forgive me for my neglect. I...
I don't know what I will do if he doesn't.
((tagging @armagnac-army, @trauma-and-truffles!))
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Saint-Chamans can be pretty oblivious at times. Unfortunately this is not one of those times. Or is it?
Saint-Chamans: Ohhhh you mean- wow that’s weird, you meeting him. Right, right, I’ll tell, uh, Maré…chal Soult that confidently. Uh, you know, that guy is kinda like us- like me and the other ADCs who wrote- well he’s more like Lameth in a way, all burned and partially hypothetical… kinda scary!
And then, holding a sleeping Helene in her arms, Louise Berg-Soult appears.
Louise Berg-Soult: Bonsoir, Duke of Istria. Helene has been lovely to look after. I am glad that you have come for her and that you seem to be in your right mind! Of course, I would not mind looking after Helene longer, but I do need to speak to Soult; she has been avoiding me and we need to have a word.
Louise has a faint smile on her face. It's not quite a smirk, but it is a knowing smile.
She starts giving Bessières Helene and Helene's things.
@murillo-enthusiast
A little later after parting ways with his otherself, Bessières will make his way to Soult's domain. It's the first time he's been anywhere else in a while, some place that isn't Duroc or Murat's domain. He can appreciate the more martial aspects of Soult's domain, and it stirs a nostalgia within him he didn't even realize he had.
He will greet whomever is outside of Soult's tent with a polite nod. "Excuse me, my sincere apologies. I realize I should have sent a message first. However, I've come to retrieve my daughter."
#rapport d’action des adcs de dalmatie#rapport d’action du duchesse de dalmatie#thread: bessieres walks into a situation#adc saint-chamans
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Ha doc your medical stuff aint got nothin on weird magic bullshit!
Cause thats what this goddamn place runs on - memories and meanings.
Anyway milladieu he is flowers now we really are a fucking public park just need some benches around
do we need to water him?
(( @askgeraudduroc || @trauma-and-truffles ))
The Recovery of Geraud Christophe Michel Duroc
...That is the uncertain part. While this book is meant to talk about fairies, the character isn't medical at all.
But...! From what we could gather in the dubious information, I think that, just by being in presence of flowers, will be enough to at least accelerate his regeneration.
Do you... perhaps have a... considerable amounts of them? If not, i could sugest bringing Duroc to my garden... Even thought, It would be preferable if we took him in the carriage.
Napoleon's calm and gentle attitude was getting quite... unsettling.
Meanwhile, Duroc would stare at Lannes, giving him a rather listless smile.
If you say so, It should be true...! But Bessieres still has to... forgive me for my neglect. I...
I don't know what I will do if he doesn't.
((tagging @armagnac-army, @trauma-and-truffles!))
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Saint-Chamans: Uh… everyone’s a femme at the moment, Your Excellency. Well, apart from us and you. And maybe the ones who started out as women. But not la Maréchale, who last I saw was trying to get a word with, uh, la Maréchale. Who I think is trying to avoid her out of embarrassment.
It’s kinda weird!
Also la Maréchale - who used to be le Maréchal, not his- her- uh, wife- this is soo confusing- has cat ears now. Because she… he was a cat for a bit. And Ney nearlycastratedhim. And he- she is still mad about that. So I really wouldn’t recommend bothering… her. I can take a message, or you can write it down - my pages are sealed.
Anyway Brun’s over there, lemme go tell Brun to get… la Maréchale but not the one who is currently an angry femme-chat. Brun!
Brun: I heard what you said. Bonjour, Your Excellency. Excuse me.
@murillo-enthusiast
A little later after parting ways with his otherself, Bessières will make his way to Soult's domain. It's the first time he's been anywhere else in a while, some place that isn't Duroc or Murat's domain. He can appreciate the more martial aspects of Soult's domain, and it stirs a nostalgia within him he didn't even realize he had.
He will greet whomever is outside of Soult's tent with a polite nod. "Excuse me, my sincere apologies. I realize I should have sent a message first. However, I've come to retrieve my daughter."
#rapport d’action des adcs de dalmatie#adc saint-chamans#adc brun de villeret#thread: bessieres walks into a situation
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Petiet: Thank you, thank you, Monsieurs Levavasseur and Heymes..!!
Saint-Chamans: What was the view like?????
Petiet: You were all really small..!
Lameth: I'd be rather surprised if we were rather big~
Soult watches the whole thing with a critical eye and a huff.
The problem is that she actually does not want to resign her title. She doesn't want to take on... another role. Even if baking full time does sound appealing.
So instead she will just watch.
And when Ney returns, she will simply say,
Thank you.
Before she turns to Petiet.
Hmmph. You are unharmed?
Petiet: I'm fi- o_O
Petiet was in the sky when... gender started happening.
Brun: ... Petiet, you should have a lie down because that was really scary. So we can talk about things that have happened while you were up there.
Petiet: But I'm fine and soult is worried about me..!
Brun: Petiet, you are coming with me.
Soult is thinking she should really take off her uniform and wear something more fitting. But first she has important business to take care of.
First, l have words for you. All of you. Why did you not inform me the moment this started happening? Did I not tell you all to immediately update me when strange things start happening?
It's time for a Soult Lecture.
Uhm... shouldn't you be worried about Petiet? He seems very up in the sky...
Yes, ADC Petiet is being kidnapped by a bunch of fairies from @askgeraudduroc. Soult stares upwards in disbelief.
WHAT.
I do not have time for this. Petiet, get down from there!
Petiet: ᴵ ᶜᵃᵃᵃᵃᵃᵃⁿ'ᵗ ᵐᵒⁿˢᶦᵉᵘʳ ˡᵉ ᵐᵃʳᵉᶜʰᵃˡ ʰᵉᵉᵉᵉᵉᵉᵉᵉᵉᵉᵉˡᵖ
Saint-Chamans: I wish that was me... he's so far away he can't even tell that you're a, uh...
A what.
Saint-Chamans: A NOTHING I MEANT NOTHING MONSI- MADAME LE- LA- UH MARECHAL.
BRUN, LOCATE A HOT AIR BALLOO-
...
BRUN, GO GET @le-brave-des-braves AND HIS ADCS AND TELL THEM THEIR FLYING EXPERTRISE IS REQUIRED TO GET MY ADC DOWN FROM THERE.
Brun: Yes, Your Excellency!
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It's Saint-Chamans! He is going to squint at Bessie oddly, because he has heard of what happened, and also the other Bessières he knows has not really been seen around.
Saint-Chamans: Salut, Your Excellency. Want me to go get Louise for you? She's been looking after the kid when she exists, and the rest of the time it's been Brun and Petiet on duty. The kid is really cute, too!
The Marshal's kinda not in a good mood so I wouldn't suggest bothering him. Also, uh... you're not a chick, huh?
@murillo-enthusiast
A little later after parting ways with his otherself, Bessières will make his way to Soult's domain. It's the first time he's been anywhere else in a while, some place that isn't Duroc or Murat's domain. He can appreciate the more martial aspects of Soult's domain, and it stirs a nostalgia within him he didn't even realize he had.
He will greet whomever is outside of Soult's tent with a polite nod. "Excuse me, my sincere apologies. I realize I should have sent a message first. However, I've come to retrieve my daughter."
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The chasseur nods.
Bessières: I am truly grateful, Monsieur le Maréchal, for your assistance... and for this conversation. It was a pleasure to meet you and to speak with you. I will make my way to the willow tree and rest a while there...
His smile is small. Is it genuine? Some part of it is.
... There is one thing more.
Bessières: ... You may one day come across one of our number, except his eyes will appear to be like a wound in the world, through which a darkness with falling stars can be seen. Beware of him, Monsieur. I cannot say more than that, for words are weapons and I cannot have him know of... this place.
Perhaps this threat will never draw near. Perhaps there is nothing to worry about. If Bessières is successful in his mission, there will be nothing to worry about.
Bessières: Thank you for the well wishes, and I wish you well with your family. Do inform Marshal Soult that I will see him shortly.
There is nothing more to say, for him. It is time to rest.
𝑼𝒏 𝒄𝒉𝒂𝒔𝒔𝒆𝒖𝒓 𝒅𝒆 𝒑𝒂𝒔𝒔𝒂𝒈𝒆.
previous: ( 1 , 2 )
—·—·—·—·—·—·—·—·—·—·—·—
"This may take some time." -- Bessières of @your-dandy-king
—·—·—·—·—·—·—·—·—·—·—·—
That was an understatement.
Bessières: ...
Surely he can summon up something intelligent to say. Surely. Surely.
Bessières: ...
He almost looks like a statue in how frozen his face is, though that's really more Lannes' domain.
Bessières: ...
He has already seen ridiculous things like a lizard in a waistcoat. He, himself, is a ridiculous thing. His mission is downright silly if you think about it.
Bessières: ... This all sounds... very... eventful... I... do not know what to say. I... believe you...
He's not sure he does, actually. He's going to change the topic because he feels he may be liable to overheat if he thinks about this too hard.
Some smoke does escape from the collar of his cloak.
Bessières: ... May I ask where Geraud is? I understand that you two are estranged for the moment, but if this is his realm...
I would like to see Eugène too, if he is around. And... I assume you have not seen Adèle, young Napoléon... or... Virginie..?
Old letters flutter in his chest. Wound up clockwork strains against beating time. But he can't put off these questions anymore.
Or maybe the shock of so much ridiculousness has lowered his guard.
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The redhead woman followed Soult. Obviously she is not putting any effort into looking like a woman but it is not making her less attractive
"Ah @your-dandy-king. I can’t see any difference."
-- @le-brave-des-braves from here
—·—·—
Soult: Tch. They are attached. I gained these ears from an incident that occurred before this... current incident. Thank you for the cake, however. Lameth, take the cake and put it in the refrigeration device.
Lameth salutes smartly and takes the cake before walking away, probably to his relief.
Soult: How goes the rebuilding of your home?
Soult isnt just a girl she is a CATGIRL you have got to go see her cute ears
Murat has been digging around in her Lost & Found vault she keeps in a church crypt in her home domain. The living lose little items like keys, umbrellas, jewelry, clothes, etc etc, and sometimes they find their way into Murat's domain. She's managed to find a pair of matching high heels among her treasures, making her 188cm height even taller. And it's topped off with a ruffled bodice and a coordinating set of breeches that really flatters her buxom, jiggling, and buff figure even more.
Then she gets the letter.
"@murillo-enthusiast gets kitty ears and a tail? She's a catgirl? NO FAIRRRRRR!"
She's going to take herself right over to Soult's domain to see for herself this catgirl.
#thread: queen of naples and duchess of elchingen#event: genderswap#rapport d’action des adcs de dalmatie#rapport d’action du duc de dalmatie
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It is not like that. There are roles for men and women in a balanced society. Without those roles, it would be unbalanced and there would be chaos.
Soult would leave but Petiet still needs rescuing.
—·—
Petiet holds onto Levavasseur tightly. Way too tightly. Extremely tightly.
Petiet: Thank you..! I was having fun and then we went way too high...
Uhm... shouldn't you be worried about Petiet? He seems very up in the sky...
Yes, ADC Petiet is being kidnapped by a bunch of fairies from @askgeraudduroc. Soult stares upwards in disbelief.
WHAT.
I do not have time for this. Petiet, get down from there!
Petiet: ᴵ ᶜᵃᵃᵃᵃᵃᵃⁿ'ᵗ ᵐᵒⁿˢᶦᵉᵘʳ ˡᵉ ᵐᵃʳᵉᶜʰᵃˡ ʰᵉᵉᵉᵉᵉᵉᵉᵉᵉᵉᵉˡᵖ
Saint-Chamans: I wish that was me... he's so far away he can't even tell that you're a, uh...
A what.
Saint-Chamans: A NOTHING I MEANT NOTHING MONSI- MADAME LE- LA- UH MARECHAL.
BRUN, LOCATE A HOT AIR BALLOO-
...
BRUN, GO GET @le-brave-des-braves AND HIS ADCS AND TELL THEM THEIR FLYING EXPERTRISE IS REQUIRED TO GET MY ADC DOWN FROM THERE.
Brun: Yes, Your Excellency!
#thread: ney’s sleepover#rapport d’action des adcs de dalmatie#le-brave-des-braves#adc petiet#rapport d’action du duc de dalmatie
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Bessières: I do hope Duroc is alright. Shame about Eugène.
What has he seen?
Bessières: The direction I headed in is an indistinct direction. It… started out as familiar, roads and landscapes that could have been in France. And then I found myself in the Internecine Forest.
The trees are made of twisted metal, and the twisted metal is that of melted guns and blades. The moon melts above into silky starlight pools. Weapons from all eras of history crunch underfoot, hulking carcasses of futuristic vehicles rust in the cold night air. Barbed wire grow between the trees like vines.
Bessières continues speaking of the strange places he has seen. The Goblin’s Farmer’s Market, a place where fairytales and souls are sold under temporary awnings alongside strange and wonderful fruits. The Crystalline Lands, a beautiful winter land under threat from the Lion of Spring who seeks to melt the Wonderful Witch's work away.
He does not talk about who he is hunting, or what he is doing in those places.
Bessières: ... Perhaps I will find myself staying a while- not in this realm, I will not impose on your hospitality overly so. But... it does seem that there are quite a few people around here that it would be good to see again.
I will stay for a day or so here, and then make my way to Marshal Soult's or Marshal Lannes', if that is permissible with you, Monsieur le Maréchal.
𝑼𝒏 𝒄𝒉𝒂𝒔𝒔𝒆𝒖𝒓 𝒅𝒆 𝒑𝒂𝒔𝒔𝒂𝒈𝒆.
previous: ( 1 , 2 )
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"This may take some time." -- Bessières of @your-dandy-king
—·—·—·—·—·—·—·—·—·—·—·—
That was an understatement.
Bessières: ...
Surely he can summon up something intelligent to say. Surely. Surely.
Bessières: ...
He almost looks like a statue in how frozen his face is, though that's really more Lannes' domain.
Bessières: ...
He has already seen ridiculous things like a lizard in a waistcoat. He, himself, is a ridiculous thing. His mission is downright silly if you think about it.
Bessières: ... This all sounds... very... eventful... I... do not know what to say. I... believe you...
He's not sure he does, actually. He's going to change the topic because he feels he may be liable to overheat if he thinks about this too hard.
Some smoke does escape from the collar of his cloak.
Bessières: ... May I ask where Geraud is? I understand that you two are estranged for the moment, but if this is his realm...
I would like to see Eugène too, if he is around. And... I assume you have not seen Adèle, young Napoléon... or... Virginie..?
Old letters flutter in his chest. Wound up clockwork strains against beating time. But he can't put off these questions anymore.
Or maybe the shock of so much ridiculousness has lowered his guard.
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The chasseur sees the lapse, sees the panic, recognises it. This other self is him, and while he is a different facet glittering slightly differently in the firelight of burned correspondence, he knows what drives it-
It is what keeps him from his own realm, after all.
Bessières: … I was merely asking after the locations of Duroc and Eugène, if you know. You said that this is the realm of Duroc - is he here?
In a way, it is envious that this other self can… afford to disassociate himself from such pain and grief. The chasseur cannot, for it is written in his soul.
𝑼𝒏 𝒄𝒉𝒂𝒔𝒔𝒆𝒖𝒓 𝒅𝒆 𝒑𝒂𝒔𝒔𝒂𝒈𝒆.
previous: ( 1 , 2 )
—·—·—·—·—·—·—·—·—·—·—·—
"This may take some time." -- Bessières of @your-dandy-king
—·—·—·—·—·—·—·—·—·—·—·—
That was an understatement.
Bessières: ...
Surely he can summon up something intelligent to say. Surely. Surely.
Bessières: ...
He almost looks like a statue in how frozen his face is, though that's really more Lannes' domain.
Bessières: ...
He has already seen ridiculous things like a lizard in a waistcoat. He, himself, is a ridiculous thing. His mission is downright silly if you think about it.
Bessières: ... This all sounds... very... eventful... I... do not know what to say. I... believe you...
He's not sure he does, actually. He's going to change the topic because he feels he may be liable to overheat if he thinks about this too hard.
Some smoke does escape from the collar of his cloak.
Bessières: ... May I ask where Geraud is? I understand that you two are estranged for the moment, but if this is his realm...
I would like to see Eugène too, if he is around. And... I assume you have not seen Adèle, young Napoléon... or... Virginie..?
Old letters flutter in his chest. Wound up clockwork strains against beating time. But he can't put off these questions anymore.
Or maybe the shock of so much ridiculousness has lowered his guard.
#thread: a passing hunter#rapport d’action du duc d'istrie#your-dandy-king#(( mobile fallback colours ))
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𝑼𝒏 𝒄𝒉𝒂𝒔𝒔𝒆𝒖𝒓 𝒅𝒆 𝒑𝒂𝒔𝒔𝒂𝒈𝒆.
previous: ( 1 , 2 )
—·—·—·—·—·—·—·—·—·—·—·—
"This may take some time." -- Bessières of @your-dandy-king
—·—·—·—·—·—·—·—·—·—·—·—
That was an understatement.
Bessières: ...
Surely he can summon up something intelligent to say. Surely. Surely.
Bessières: ...
He almost looks like a statue in how frozen his face is, though that's really more Lannes' domain.
Bessières: ...
He has already seen ridiculous things like a lizard in a waistcoat. He, himself, is a ridiculous thing. His mission is downright silly if you think about it.
Bessières: ... This all sounds... very... eventful... I... do not know what to say. I... believe you...
He's not sure he does, actually. He's going to change the topic because he feels he may be liable to overheat if he thinks about this too hard.
Some smoke does escape from the collar of his cloak.
Bessières: ... May I ask where Geraud is? I understand that you two are estranged for the moment, but if this is his realm...
I would like to see Eugène too, if he is around. And... I assume you have not seen Adèle, young Napoléon... or... Virginie..?
Old letters flutter in his chest. Wound up clockwork strains against beating time. But he can't put off these questions anymore.
Or maybe the shock of so much ridiculousness has lowered his guard.
12 notes
·
View notes