quiet-remit
Kalaam -e- Raqeeb
Khudh se bekhabar
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Sometimes people pretend you're a bad person so they don't feel guilty about the things they did to you.
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I cried writing about you as blood trickled down my arm. Why wont you realise I need you in my life?
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Lately, I've been feeling like a ghost. I wish I could just fade away completely. It bothers me that people have to see me, like an annoying fungus popping up in their view.
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I am no longer on your beck and call
chained to your every whim
to your versions of reality.
I will no longer smile and nod
when your bended truths
try to claw their way into me.
I am no longer locked up
in your haunted house of see-through 'facts'
and delirious actions
trying to at least dragg me down with you
into the cold waters
of your own delusions.
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If I could go back and tell you how it ends, I would've done it
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Why waste time learning, when ignorance is instantaneous?
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they were just two damaged people trying to heal each other.
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i can't explain what i mean. and even if i could, i'm not sure i'd feel like it
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Desire often creates paradoxical effects: The more you want something,
the more you chase after it, the more it eludes you.
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We are all just waiting for another universe to collide with ours, to change what we can't ourselves.
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May Allah accept all of our efforts to follow His Path, may He forgive us for the things we fall short of and may we always be guided on His Straight Path.
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im like an absent father in my own life I'm uninvolved af
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WRITING THIS CUS ANSAR ASKED ME TO JOURNAL MY THOUGHTS:
it's like my brain has this strange combination of being a total softie and a complete dummy when it comes to dealing with people who treated me like a punching bag. it's like my heart's got a stubborn grip on kindness, even when folks don't deserve an ounce of it. maybe i've got this deep-rooted belief that everyone's got a glimmer of goodness hidden somewhere. or perhaps i'm just wired to see the world through rose-tinted glasses because it's easier on the soul.
bro being kind ain't the same as being a pushover. no sir, it takes some serious backbone and bravery to keep the kindness flowing, especially when it's not being returned. i'm starting to realize that i need to stand up for myself and put some fences around my own patch of happiness. i can't let people trample all over me just because i've got a soft spot for niceness. i deserve better than that.
i'm learning that being kind doesn't mean i have to tolerate mistreatment. it means i can still dish out compassion while also putting my own well-being first. it's like being a fluffy kitten with razor-sharp claws, soft on the outside, but ready to defend myself when necessary.
so, from here on out, i'll kick the toxic leeches to the curb and seek out the company of those who know how to reciprocate.
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