paintedtragedy59
TW vent blog
D. he/they 25 back again bc I cant get my shit together minors dni pls
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I've had 5 guys but no burgers
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This house is a JOKE my partner just fell through the goddamn FLOOR
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My high ass staring at the delivery status of my doordash knowing damn well it will cause a breakdown later
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I wonder how long it would take my family/friends to notice if I delete my social media
Probably at least a month lol
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Hahaha was gonna talk to my partner abt how im feeling lately but they went out drinking and now i feel like if i say anything its just going to be me purposefully ruining their good mood :/
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Might dump some of my vent writing here idk it depends on if i wanna bother making a side blog or not ig
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Its one am and i cant tell if im hallucinating or if something is actually scratching around in the fucking walls :/
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I dont believe that there are people on earth that have never thought about killing themselves
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Cut out the problematic people in ur life!!!
I have abandonment issues and a crippling fear of being alone, next please.
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Knowing that if they had to chose it will always be her
Knowing that as i am now will never truly be enough for anyone
Knowing im nothing better than a burden
Knowing that if anyone else had the choice they would never chose me
Knowing that everything i was told is true, that im undesirable, ugly, worthless, a mistake
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Maybe this time getting so high I cant move will fix me
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mental breakdown pet peeve: the snot
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you know a book is gonna be utter shit when every description starts off like this
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I truly dont understand how im supposed to keep living like this. I dont know what Im supposed to do. nothing works. I feel trapped. I cant stand myself. I cant stand the way my brain works, the way my emotions form. I want out. I want to stop feeling like this.
I feel so alone. I feel like i cant talk to anyone. Like ill just end up burdening more people in the end. Like theyll understand how rotten i am and want nothing to do with me at all. Like how dare I complain when everyone else has real problems.
I keep trying so hard to hide it from everyone. I want someone to care enough to notice but i dont want to be seen at all.
I wish i wasn't a coward. I wish I didnt have to live like this. I wish i could remember what being happy yo be alive feels like.
I hate it all. I wish it would all just go away.
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