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muffinman1900 · 2 months

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Shower time

FyoSig (Fyodor X Sigma)

681 words, if you don’t like the ship you really don’t need to comment about it 🤨

Fluff, No body description- and I haven’t properly proof read, so sorry for any spelling mistakes 💔

Sigma, the manager of the Sky Casino, had to attend a business meeting. However, said meeting had to take place in Europe, meaning he had left Japan for about a week.

Sigma made his partner, Fyodor, promise to take at least one shower while he was away. That didn’t happen.

The process of even getting Fyodor to consider having a shower took at least 2 days. And actually forcing him into the shower took hours.

“Fyodor you have to.” Sigma pleaded.

“No. I don’t want to.” Fyodor shot back; he was sitting comfortably on the pair's sofa, playing with something on his laptop- probably terrorism related let’s be honest.

“Fedya I know you don’t like taking showers, but I’m concerned. You haven’t showered in over a month!”

Fyodor turned his head away from the man, trying to pretend he didn’t exist. This was a common, ‘I know you're right but it’s easier if I pretend you don’t exist’ move. But that’s not what Sigma wanted at this point in time. He wanted his beloved to have a shower and wash his hair. He obviously cared about his well being, but if the black haired man got head lice there was no way his own beautifully cared for lavender and white hair would be able to avoid the irritating bugs too. Lice shampoo was the last thing he needed on his own hair at this time- it would ruin all the recent hair care work!

“Fedya, this is now an intervention!” Sigma said proudly as he wrapped his arms around the back of Fyodor’s neck, as well as under his knees, resulting in a bridal style lift.

Fyodor was light as a twig- sigma could easily pick him up despite not being very physically strong at all.

Fyodor was forcefully carried, kicking and complaining, into their shared bedroom, where he sullenly took off his usual clothes. Sigma also promptly undressed.

Before Fyodor could escape- which he did try- sigma took him by both wrists and pulled him into the bathroom.

“Fyodor, I am going to wash your hair. If you really really really don’t want this shower, I will let you go.”

Fyodor didn’t answer, he just looked down at his wrists still being held by his favourite person in the whole world, Sigma. He looked back up and a slightly guilty look plastered itself to his face.

This is as much of an answer as Sigma's going to get this far into the shower process. Fyodor didn’t like taking while showering.

Sigma fiddled with the shower taps before finding the right temperature, and pushing Fyodor straight into it, so he couldn’t back out at the last minute.

Fyodor stayed still while sigma methodically rubbed and massaged shampoo into his absolutely horrendous scalp. Fyodor scrunched his eyes closed as tight as he possibly could while Sigma rinsed out the first round of shampoo, taking extra care himself to not get any water on Fyodor’s face- and Fyodor appreciated that. After putting shampoo in his hair two more times, Sigma moved onto the conditioner. This time he used a comb to push the conditioner through the now clean hair, and properly detangle all the knots that had formed through the vigorous shampooing he’d done just minutes previously.

Each time the comb pushed its way over Fyodor’s scalp, he let out a content hum, but he didn’t open his eyes.

After all of the product was removed from Fyodor’s hair, Sigma quickly washed his own hair, and let Fyodor pull it gently into a long braid while he messed around with a face mask- which Fyodor would absolutely not be putting on his own skin.

By the end of the night, both of them were suitably clean, and both quite happy.

“I told you it wouldn’t be bad.”

Sigma kissed Fyodor's cheek, before turning over to sleep, as Fyodor clicked away on his laptop, most likely doing some more terrorism of some kind. At least he was now a clean, nice smelling terrorist.

#bungou stray dogs #bsd fyodor #bsd sigma #fyodor x sigma #fyosig #bsd oneshot #bsd fluff #bsd fanfic #sigma bungou stray dogs #fyodor dostoyevsky bsd

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muffinman1900 · 6 months

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Reblog if it’s okay for your mutuals to tag you in random stuff they think you’ll like

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muffinman1900 · 9 months

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Soukoku (Dazai X Chuuya)

Food packages

Sorry for any spelling mistakes, I’m dyslexic and I can’t proof read for the life of me. I take requests if anyone wants anything!

(This is 739 words)

Dazai awoke in the morning in his agency dorm room. This is normal, but what isn’t is the lack of a small paper bag at the end of his bed.

Every evening, Chuuya, in his luxurious penthouse, would make himself some healthy dinner. It would be spicy and good for the body. Those three things: healthy, good and spicy, were not to Dazai’s taste.

Chuuya (the biggest Dazai simp alive) was quite aware of this. He was also aware of his husband's lack of motivation to stay alive. This includes forgetting to eat, not due to not wanting to but genuinely forgetting. It didn’t help that Dazai was a picky eater, making finding food for himself harder, there was always an ingredient he just hated. Most of his eating habits started due to Dazai’s braces when he was younger. He hated getting food in them and got told off by his orthodontist a lot; Dazai had terrible teeth anyway, and it wasn’t his fault. For Chuuya, Dazai being a picky eater was actually good.

After being work partners since 15, they both knew each other's eating habits off by heart. Dazai never tried anything new. However he did try one new thing a month- and he usually didn’t like it at all.

Chuuya affectionately makes Dazai rice balls in an array of shapes, like stars, bears and cats, and cut cucumbers into star shapes along with some other food and would put it in an orange bento box.

He would put some dried strawberry granola in a heart shaped pot with some strawberry yogurt, and put a little spoon with it.

He would put some apple slices without the skin and orange quarters in a separate blue divider pot with sharks on it.

He basically made exactly the same things every night as he made himself his own dinner, and he would put it in a paper bag. Chuuya writes little notes, telling Dazai to remember to do things, or to have a good day, or simply to say he loves him. He would write with small loopy handwriting, and would sign his name in red ink. He used a little heart sticker to stick the notes to the side of the bag.

Every night, after Chuuya ate his dinner, he would sneak into the agency’s dorms, and open Dazai’s unlocked dorm room door to leave the small bag at the end of his bed.

Every evening Dazai would drop the same bag off at the front desk off the building where Chuuya’s penthouse was.

But today, as Dazai woke up, hearing sounds of light commotion in the office nearby, he didn’t see the bag at the end of his bed.

That was odd. But Dazai continued his day as he normally would.

Dazai made his way into the office and he was very happily surprised. There was Kunikida, Yosano and Ranpo standing around a chair with Chuuya tied to it.

“Chuuya!” Dazai beemed, “how are you today?”

“Well Osamu, your co-workers have me tied to a chair, but apart from that I’m pretty good, what about you?” He replied almost like this was completely normal.

“I’m a bit hungry if I’m honest.” Dazai said tauntingly. He knew why Chuuya was currently tied to a chair- he got caught entering to give Dazai food.

“Oh shut up.” Chuuya replied, starting a bickering match between the two.

To say Dazai’s co-workers weren’t astonished by this would be utterly incorrect. They just sat there baffled until Kunikida decided to stop the two arguing.

“Dazai. Do you know why Nakahara, one of the Port Mafia’s strongest executives, was in our dorm building?”

“Oh Kunikida~ Chuuya here wasn’t doing any harm! Actually he was technically helping us!” Dazai giggled childishly.

“What do you mean?” Ranpo asked in a more mature voice than normal.

“He was just delivering me food! Can’t a husband retrieve food from his beloved?” Dazai asked in a sing-song voice.

Dazai united Chuuya, and Chuuya walked over to a desk where the paper bag had been placed. He gave it to Dazai, gave him a hug and then a kiss on the cheek.

“Have a good day!” Dazai shouted as Chuuya jumped out of the window, flying off with gravity manipulation.

“What the fuck just happend?” Yosano exclaimed.

Dazai pulled out his strawberry granola and yogurt and started working quietly, humming the tune to his favourite song about double suicide.

#braces!dazai #soukoku #dazai x chuuya #bungou stray dogs #bsd dazai #dazai fluff #dazai osamu #chuuyabsd #chuuya nakahara #soukoku bsd #soukoku headcanons #bungo gay dogs #port mafia #armed detective agency #bsd fluff #bsd fanfic

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muffinman1900 · 9 months

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Soukoku (Dazai X Chuuya)

“Your married?!”

I apologise for any spelling or grammatical errors! I am dyslexic and proof reading isn’t my best skill.

(This is 638 words!)

Dazai ran into the office, quite obviously short of breath. He had been running.

“You’re two minutes late Dazai.” Kunikida stated.

“I tried to be on timeeee” Dazai wines in his usual sing song fashion.

“What do you have going on in the morning that’s so important you're late for work.” Kunikida states. It was said as more of a rhetorical question, as he didn’t think Dazai had anything going on, ever.

“Well it’s none of your business.” Dazai was serious this time- and walked away after his statement, leaving Kunikida stunned. He’s never serious about his whereabouts? Actually, come to think of it, the agency didn’t even know where he lived.

The agency didn’t keep a record of postcodes, but the team usually went to each other's houses if they didn’t live in the dorms.

Dazai had a dorm, but if anything he used it for storage, and he went home every evening.

Whatever happened next is unexplained, but it ended with Dazai literally pinned in a corner with no escape, and the entire agency surrounding him. He couldn’t resist now, he had to answer all their questions, and he was feeling quite truthful today. It was too tiresome to keep up the mask all the time.

Kunikida started the questions, “Why are you never free after hours on a Wednesday?”

And Dazai answered truthfully, “It’s my turn to make dinner on Wednesday.”

Silence.

The room was engulfed in silence.

“You have a girlfriend?” Atsushi asked in utter shock.

“Nope, but I do have a husband.”

Even more silence, followed by a single giggle from Ranpo.

“You figured as much I’m guessing, Ranpo?”

“Yes, I never believed your double suicide with a woman thing. I mean yes I bet you want to commit double suicide and all that- but I can’t see a single heterosexual bone in your body.”

“Well done Ranpo! I am in fact married to a man!” Dazai announced to the room as he pulled out a necklace chain from under his shirt collar, at one end there sat a black ring with a single small diamond in the middle.

“Ok then, who are you married to? It’s the only part of the puzzle I can’t figure out.” Ranpo stated, shocking the people around the room, he always figured things out. But there was just too much about Dazai he didn’t know.

“Hehe.. you're not going to like this, especially Kunikida… has anyone ever heard of Double Black?”

Kunikida’s interest was absolutely peaked by the fact that he ‘wouldn’t like it’; he didn’t like a lot of things about Dazai but if he was so sure he wouldn’t be happy with it, it definitely made him question who it was.

“Double black? The duo from the Port Mafia, famed for bringing down an entire ability using organisation over night? People speculate one of the members was Nakahara Chuuya, but had no idea of the other’s possible identity.” Kunikida listed off.

“Didn’t people think that the duo were also lovers? Or was that just me? And they haven’t been spotted recently, although apparently they still do some missions that don’t have any meaning to any organisations in the area?” Ranpo also interjected.

“Yes, that one. Well, it is Nakahara Chuuya, and I’m the other member, surprise!” Dazai said losing confidence half way through his sentence.

Silence filled the room once again.

“We are married. We live together and everything- and to answer your previous question, yes I make dinner on a Wednesday, AND I’m in charge of breakfast every day.”

“WHAT?!”

“Yes I know no one expects me to know how to cook!” Dazai jokes.

“You're married to one of the strongest Port Mafia executives.”

“And yet he’s only strongest when in a duo with me?~” Dazai’s iconic voice comes back slowly with each word.

#soukoku #dazaibsd #dazai osamu #bungou stray dogs dazai #dazai x chuuya #bungou stray dogs #chuuya nakahara #chuuya supremacy #chuuyabsd #bsd oneshot #i take requests #fanfic

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