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Jack found it a little worrying he didn’t want to tell him about it, but he didn’t push it, since he’d make it worse. So he slipped an arm around him and began thinking up what to change the  subject to. 

“Alright, we don’t gotta. How’re you now?” 

He hesitated for a moment, but finally gained it in him to  lean into the other. “ ‘m fine,” he murmured, smiling half heartedly before he looked up at Jack. 

             “you? I jus’ saw you this mornin’ but...”

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“Good, it’s been good..” He answered a little too quickly for his liking, effectively erasing any sense of calmness he’d hoped to convey for Arthur’s sake, so he moved over to the sofa and laid himself over it, patting the spot next to him for the other. “Sit. How was yours?” 

He was hardly bothered by the answer being all too quick, and , in fact it was endearing.  When the spot was patted, e took his seat and smiled half heartedly before leaning into a quick kiss to  his cheek, heart racing faster than moments before. 

“Okay,” he murured, “I don’t wanna talk ‘bout it”

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He busied himself with cleaning, rearranging, dusting as he waited, so he wouldn’t have to think too much about how  Arthur was doing. Of course, he hoped he was doing better now, but dwelling on it would do nothing and he could deal  with it when (or if) it was brought up. The door rang soon  enough, so he finished up with what he was doing and  opened the door. “Hey. Come in.”

Arthur was relieved, to say the least, to see Jack again. While the morning had been right awkward and , admittedly a bit embarrassing, it was the most fun he had had in awhile and he would need that reminder just then. “Hey..” he greeted, sheepishly smiling as he helped himself in, blush burning over his face. Only when it was cool did he look up. “How-how was your day?” he then asked, hoping for anything to ease the tension he felt.

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Arthur nodded, his hand coming up to brush over his eye.  “Probably a half.. half hour? If t’s too late I-i understand.”

“Not at all. If I answer, it’s not too late.” That gave him a little time to do something about the place. Better than none. “See you then, yeah?”

Arthur nodded , smiling to himself as he stood. “Yeah, see you then.” he said, then hung up. he got dressed in something different from the night before, then immediately headed over to Jacks place. Though he had some regrets about the night before, Malcolm would be the only one to speak to and even then he was only going to be home around midnight. So Jack was his option. At about forty minutes from the phone call, Arthur foud himself knocking on the apartment he had been at just hours earlier.

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“Of course. I’m in.” It warmed his heart to hear that - he’d been eager to see him again. “Uh, how far are  you from here?” He glanced over at the clock to  work out what time he’d arrive and it’d be nice to  know how long he had to tidy up a little. 

Arthur nodded, his hand coming up to brush over his eye.  “Probably a half.. half hour? If t’s too late I-i understand.”

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Jack had been glancing at his phone all day, hoping for a  call to come soon, today. So when the phone did ring, he’d picked it up and answered it within the first couple of rings,  pleased to hear Arthur’s voice on the other end. “Uh huh.  Hey, Arthur.” 

Arthur smiled faintly and sat back in his bed.  He was far from sure how to ask this without soundeing too eager, so he went for it. “Can- can i come over?”

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Oh God, did he hold him tight. There was an urge to give him gentle kisses, but he resisted, since he doubted it would help with things. He just held him, hoping it’d  make him feel any better and that he were helping in some way, even if he wouldn’t talk.

As he withdrew, Arthur found himself missing Jack’s touch more and more, even after he left the apartment and as he went back home. It went just how he would have guessed, a few snide remarks, some scolding for not calling and what not, and pretty soon Arthur found himself in tears once more. By dinner, he was back at his own apartment, phone in hand, tapping in the phone number of Jack. His breaths were more of heaves, and his voice sounded choked, but he would fix that before he answered. 

                                   “Ja-... Jack?”

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Jack nodded, pretending not to hear any change in his voice. “See you around, yeah? Oh, hang on.” He got up to find something to write on, then scribbled his number down for him, handing it over as he returned. “Call me?” 

Arthur’s eyes followed, then lingered on the piece of paper. He gave him a brief nod, then went to get dressed. He took the piece of paper and looked to Jack, then hesitantly moved over to hug him tight. 

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There was his answer, and he nodded his understanding.  “Alright. Good.” He didn’t believe he was fine, but if he  wanted to say he was, he’d let him have that. It’d be cruel not to, and pursuing it further would only upset him. He’d  be ready to talk when he was ready.

He looked between Jack and the bed. He had no reason to be upset just then. Jack did what he had asked, and there was no one to blame but himself.  “I-I need to.. go home,” he uttered, “I ne-need to go... tell  ‘em why i was l-late..” He tried, boy did he try, not to let his voice go that noticeable , but in the end there was no stopping. 

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He’d checked in on him after around ten minutes had passed,  when he couldn’t take the worry any longer, but he gave him  the courtesy of doing so as silently as he could, padding softly  and placing an ear to the door. Quiet sounds of distress were  heard, and he left without a word, set on pretending he’d heard nothing for his sake, slipping back beneath the covers to worry quietly about him. 

Once he returned, he pondered over whether he should speak  or not, and decided Arthur’s answer would determine if he were  up for talking. “..You alright?”

Arthur settled against the pillow. He wanted to talk, but then again it wouldn’t do much. What happened was done and over with , and now he needed to accept it. Again, he loved it, it was the best time of his life, but that was precisely the problem. 

He looked towards jack at his question, then back down at the blankets. “yeah just had to um.. Clean-clean up a li’l bit. ‘m fine.

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..Oh. Maybe it hadn’t been so good, then.. He wrapped his arms around himself, since Arthur wasn’t there for that, and shook gently. Had he done something wrong? To boot, he  could feel himself coming down now, and after that slight  rejection, he felt he was crashing hard. 

Arthur looked at himself in the mirror, completely .. disappointed   in himself. How could he have acted like that with someone- and Jack of all people. Because he wanted it, but that was wrong, wasn’t it? He was shaking , and crying even, and over flooding with anxiety that he could hardly bring himself to leave. After a half hour, however, it was fine. Or he would convince himself he was fine.  Arthur went back to the bedroom and sat on the bed, silence coming over him once again . He stared at the ceiling, fingers clenching shut only to open soon after. This was a mistake.

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Jack pulled Arthur into an embrace once it were over,  thoughts of his own first time coming to mind. Rough,  hard, fast, painful and to boot, the one who’d taken it had left without another word. He compared and  contrasted it to this one; he’d been gentle, he thought,  and tried to make it good for him. 

“You were perfect, love.” A kiss was pressed to his cheek  as he spoke into his ear, smiling warmly. “I hope it was as  good for you as me.”

Arthur didn’t answer. He hoped his silence would’t be mistaken for disappointment or anything of the sort, as he was far from.   What was he going to do ? He couldn’t go speak to his parents now, not only because it’s late but because he would feel twice as guilty walking through the door. He couldn’t just leave, because Jack would think the worst.

After a moment of consideration, he murmured “I’ll be back,” he  pulled on his underwear, then pants before he headed to the bathroom and shut the door, locking it behind him. 

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With his consent secured, he removed his hands from the other to shimmy out of his pants, kicking them off the side of the bed. Once he was done, he returned his attention to Arthur to do the same for him. 

Arthur helped him with his own, then reached down to do the same to him. His eyes strayed from Jacks, still feeling a sense of embarrassment -especially not being exposed. 

It wasn’t all too bad. There was some pain, some uncomfort, but it was over soon enough. If anything it went better than he had expected it to be, but there was still a large bit of guilt coming to mind. he pulled the blanket tight around his waist and looked to Jack,  then the bed. 

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A soft moan left his lips as he was kissed more, pressing kisses where he could land them, largely among Arthur’s tangled hair. And then, the words he’d wanted to hear.  “Now.” A pause, before he added. “If you’re sure..” 

Arthur nodded. There was no hesitation, no second guessing, not even a hint that time like the time before. His hands came up to jack and although he was right nervous- very nervous, in fact- he did’t want him to know. Everyone was nervous their first time, there was no reason to stop.

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It was needless to say he was enjoying this, and  he just wanted for Arthur to enjoy himself as much as he, or even more. He was here to please, placing gentle kiss after kiss onto  and around the other’s  jaw, pressing in closer as he was pulled in.

Arthur parted his lips a little further as he felt his lips get closer to his own, and once he was able to, he teased Jack’s lips with a hesitant tongue before immediately moving to kiss his neck. “Whenever you’re...ready” he uttered, his thigh coming up for a moment of embarrassment before laying down again.

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Slower. Right. He didn’t really want to, but if Arthur did then he would. The last thing he wanted was to hurt him, so he  gave more innocent, closed mouth kisses for now, making  far slower movements, taking his time, though everything  inside him was fully alert and alive. 

Arthur breaths a small “thank you” as he leaned back against the pillow and drew him near. They were only so early in the process, but it didn’t take long for him to feel himself stiffen beneath his underwear, causing him to look down before returning to the kiss. Part of him wanted to cover up, not want to be seen by Jack but the other was enjoying this far too much. There was something a bout another touching you that made this decision easy.  

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