martindeservedbetter - Tumblr blog

martindeservedbetter · 5 days

Text

the only exception

Vilkas x F! Harbinger! Dragonborn! Reader

PART ONE

word count: 4697

triggers: none

summary: Vilkas doesn't believe in love. But his harbinger sure does. Is there anything he can do to get her mind off of being single? Yes. Yes, there is.

prompt: from @writings-of-a-hufflepuff List #2 prompt 61

“I’m sorry…I shouldn’t have done that, you can look after

yourself…I shouldn’t have…I’m sorry.”

preview:

“Two beds.” Vilkas slid the septims to the woman.

“I’m sorry to say we don’t have two beds available, just one.”

Vilkas turned to Y/n, who was half asleep on his arm.

“That will do just fine, do you happen to have an extra fur-”

The woman stared at Y/n, then back to Vilkas.

“You sure you need two?”

Love had never been very important to Vilkas. Sure, he loved the camaraderie the Companions had, but it wasn't family. Farkas understood family, and how to love, so when Farkas announced his engagement to Feyna, it didn't phase Vilkas.

Though, it was certainly a wake-up call for Y/n, who had been their Harbinger for the past two years since Kodlak had passed on to Sovngarde. And this phased Vilkas.

He watched her smile back at Farkas, but he saw the heartbreak in her eyes. She had always spoken about wanting to be married by now. To be loved by now. And she was watching it slip through her fingertips.

"We'd love it if you all came to our ceremony next week!"

Farkas shouted, pulling Feyna into his side.

Cheers erupted from the Companions, all hoisting mugs of mead toward the couple. Aela then began a speech about Farkas, but Vilkas hadn’t bothered to listen as Y/n’s face did not match her actions.

"Y/n?"

Vilkas caught her saddened eyes.

"Are you alright?"

It was the sudden change in her face that shattered her facade of peace.

"Of course, no need to worry Vilkas."

But that did not answer his question, but he knew that she wouldn’t answer him, not in her current state.

"To Farkas!” the others answered, quickly following suit.

And as it turns out, it would be much harder to garner her attention.

___________________

It was a quieter day in Whiterun, and Y/n had deemed it her own day off and told the Companions to spend the day as they saw fit.

This only piqued Vilkas’s interest, as he saw his beloved Harbinger don something other than the armor she usually adorned. It was a soft beige tunic, half-tucked into her cloth pants, and with her boots laced up. Even her hair was styled a bit differently, the hairs she usually kept from her face, were now loose and free…

“Where are you off to today, Y/n?”

Vilkas asked, catching her at the front door.

“Vilkas!”

He watched as her body tensed at the sound of his voice. She seemingly missed him standing at the door.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to frighten you, I just know that today we are free to take a break from our daily training, and well you seemed dressed up-”

“I’m just going to the market.”

“May I join you?”

Her eyes widened briefly, before returning to her previous facial expression.

“I suppose that would be fine, I just didn’t want to be identified… Just blend in a bit, you know?”

He glanced down at his armor-clad form and met her eyes once more.

“I can change?” He offered, and she laughed.

“You want to join me that badly that the wolf of Jorrvaskr wants to become a man?”

He flushed, as even he didn’t know why he wanted to join her so badly, but he just swallowed and nodded.

“Maybe we can at least get that warpaint off,” she smiled.

“If that would please you of course.”

“Please me?”

He groaned,” Ignore me Y/n. I’ll get civilianized and return to you.”

She just rolled her eyes and set her hand on the sword's hilt strapped to her side.

It wasn’t long until Vilkas returned, hair tied tight, wearing just a tunic and trousers, a sword still strapped to his back. His warpaint had gone, but his icy blues were just as piercing as ever.

“Is this more acceptable?”

And the smile on her face had made all of his hassle worth it.

___________________

“Hello Carlotta, how have sales been going?”

“Y/n!”

Carlotta ran to the front of her stall, wrapping her arms around the Harbinger.

“I don’t see you often enough.”

They parted from each other and Y/n’s hand fell to the back of her neck.

“I’m sorry. I’ll try to see you more.”

Carlotta’s eyes fell on Vilkas.

“Oh, I didn’t know you had a beloved.”

The pair's eyes widened, as they both began quickly trying to explain that they were not in fact that.

She gave a knowing smile but said nothing.

“Well then, what would your name be sir?”

“Oh, Vilkas.”

“A quiet one, eh? Just like Mila’s father,” it was a sad smile that graced her lips, and Vilkas knew that it would be extremely rude if he tried to learn about the man.

“He was determined to come with me to see you today.”

“Oh was he?”

The way the women teased him sent chills down his spine, as he was not used to being belittled or put on the spot like this. But he stayed silent, watching the women interact, and watching a side of Y/n he had not yet gotten to see.

“So, no man yet, Y/n?”

“Carlotta!” Y/n hissed, and Vilkas could hear the same pain in her voice as when Farkas announced his wedding.

“Well, it’s been two years of you claiming you’d be wed and-”

Vilkas threw an arm over her shoulder, pulling Y/n closer to himself.

“She’s actually doing quite well despite her goal. She’s very important in my life.”

“Vilkas…”

Carlotta simply nodded, but there was a glimmer in her eye.

“Oh! It seems to me I have a new customer, it was great talking to you Y/n! I hope to see you sooner?”

Y/n sighed but nodded.

“I will speak with you again soon Carlotta.”

And they turned from her stand, but all Vilkas could feel were Y/n’s eyes boring into him.

“What?”

“Why did you stand up for me then?”

She didn’t meet his eyes but simply continued up the stairs back to Jorrvaskr.

“It was only right.”

“She was just teasing.” She paused and met his eyes.

“You didn’t like it.

And she opened her mouth to retort, but seemingly couldn’t find the words.

“Let’s just go home.”

And their market trip seemed to have come to a sudden halt.

But why did he still want to be closer?

___________________

"Y/n?"

It was a quiet voice, as he had decided to creep into her room. And there she was slumped over her desk, softly muttering things in her sleep.

Vilkas just chuckled, this was no way for her to sleep.

"C’mon, let's get you to bed-"

"But what about me? Am I not allowed to be happy?"

Vilkas stopped in his tracks, maybe he shouldn't wake her.

"What do you mean Harbingers don't get married?! That's not fair-!"

A tear rolled down her cheek, and Vilkas immediately changed his approach.

"Y/n," he brushed the hair from her face," Y/n, wake up."

Her eyes fluttered open and met his icy blues.

"Vilkas? Why aren't you asleep?"

There was no lace of sleep in those words, she had just sat upright, and he could just feel the tension in her shoulders.

"I wanted to check on you, but then I saw you weren't sleeping well…"

"You didn't hear anything right?"

His voice caught in his throat.

"You did. Please don't tell anyone-"

"You're allowed to love, Y/n. None of us will hold that against you, I won't hold it against you."

"...Can I be honest with you Vilkas?"

"Of course."

"I don't think I'm unlovable, I just think that no man will ever want to marry a woman with that much authority."

Vilkas smiled," There will be someone. It would be impossible not to love you."

He paused for but a moment then continued with," Let's get you to bed."

As soon as she rose from her chair, Vilkas swept her off her feet and carried her toward her bed.

"I could have walked you know."

"Well someone needs to care for you! Might as well be me."

And there was no sparky comment to follow.

___________________

It wasn't strange for Vilkas to keep an eye on everyone’s training. He was one of the members of the Circle, and many of the others would do the same. However, it was strange to Vilkas that he would always keep his eye on one person, Y/n.

She was their newest little whelp who had begun her climb through the ranks, now even outranking himself, as his Harbinger. She had very easily won him over, and he was almost proud of her.

"Hey, Vilkas!"

He was drawn out of his own thoughts by that very same person, and he made his way over to her.

"Yes? What is it?"

"So you know how I’ve been trying to learn how to fight with any weapon right? I've got the bow and short swords down, but I can't get this greatsword. And well, you train whelps with greatswords, so I was hoping you could help me too."

"Yeah, of course just show me what you've got."

She nodded and began swinging at the practice dummy, only laying a couple of solid blows before stopping herself.

"So first of all your stance is all wrong. Move your feet closer together."

"Like this?"

He watched her feet shift slightly, but not to his liking.

"Not like that," he came up behind her, wrapping his hands over hers and correcting her stance with his body.

"You're going to want to put your whole body into it. It'll drive more force through with each blow. So that's why you need a solid footing."

As he spoke, his warm breath tickled her ear.

"Alright, but then how do I take a swing and not leave myself vulnerable?"

"That comes with practice. Which actually," he released her from his arms," Stay here, there might be something I have to help you out."

And Vilkas jogged his way back into Jorrvaskr and tried to ignore Tilma’s complaints as he broke into a sprint when he made his way inside.

“Idiotic child…”

He knew it was stupid, going out of his way to help train his Harbinger, but that didn’t stop him as he grabbed the wooden sword Jergen had given him.

___________________

The toy was slipped out of his grasp.

"I think you're ready for a true sword. Remember Vilkas, a man's strength is not ability, but in his heart," Jergen explained.

"But I'm not strong enough! It's too heavy-"

"You'll grow into it. I know you will."

The large steel blade was placed in his hands.

“You will be ready, and I pray this blade helps you for a lifetime.”

___________________

“Here, let’s start with this.”

“A wooden blade?” Y/n laughed,” Aren’t I a bit advanced for this?”

“This blade has served a young boy very well. It was the way his father trained him. He was a foolish boy, but regardless, this blade was kind to him.”

“This was yours? Did Jergen-”

Vilkas nodded.

“So let’s try this stance again shall we?”

___________________

It wasn’t a difficult mission, and it was the first one Y/n had taken on in quite some time. She of course had her jobs as the famous Last Dragonborn, but this one she took up upon her title of Harbinger. Vilkas, of course, volunteered to be her shield-brother to which she accepted.

The mission was simple. There was some monster threatening a small village on the outskirts of Riften, just at the border of Skyrim and Morrowind. Truly no big deal for such experienced warriors as the Harbinger and her wolf.

That was until Y/n was face to face with a rabid werewolf and the oncoming panic attack she had no control over. She froze mid-battle and couldn’t stop the way her body shook, or the way her blade fell from her hands.

Vilkas jumped in and fought the beast in her stead, fending off the wolf from its violent attacks. When the beast fell, Vilkas sighed and turned to her. She had fallen to her knees, and words began to fall from his mouth.

“I’m sorry…I shouldn’t have done that, you can look after yourself…I shouldn’t have…I’m sorry.”

“Vilkas…”

She threw herself into his arms and began to sob.

“I was so scared, I am so scared.”

“I’m here, Y/n. I’m here.”

His hands found themselves tangled within her locks, as her face was buried into his chest. The silence in the wood was only pierced by her sobs as she shook.

“I’m here…” he mused, holding her tighter.

He understood her fear, the curse that came with being a companion was horrid. It happened to be why she never shifted, and why Vilkas found it hard for himself to do so. He was never quite proud of being a beast, but any pride he had was gone when he realized how much she hated the beast.

She let out a sigh and began to try to compose herself.

"I'm okay. You can let me go now."

But Vilkas didn't miss the way her eyes still held sadness and the way her voice wavered just a bit.

"Don’t force yourself to be okay, Y/n. I can be strong for you right now. You can be human."

He watched as the tears came to her eyes again, and he pulled her into himself again. It was a gentle hold, his hands rubbing her back.

Kiss her.

Vilkas shook off the thought. It was not the place nor time to do so. And besides, how could she love a beast like him…

___________________

They had reached the edge of Eastmarch and had planned to stop in Windhelm for the night. Y/n had been very quiet for most of the ride, and Vilkas took this as a sign that he should take the lead for the rest of their trip.

They had handed their horses to the stablemaster and headed toward the city gates. Vilkas had noticed the way that Y/n would lag behind him, almost shuffling her feet.

“You know Y/n, I could just carry you.”

“I’m quite alright Vilkas.”

And yet she still didn’t match his slowed pace, or even look at him while answering his comment.

“Alright, that’s it.”

And he hoisted her up in his arms.

“Vilkas! Vilkas I demand that you put me down this instant! As your harbinger, I-”

“In all due respect, I’m not going to listen to you just this once.” He looked down at her.

“Vilkas-”

“Please, Y/n.”

His voice came out a little too weak, and he prayed she didn’t notice. And she just relented, arms finding their way around his neck and averting her eyes from onlookers, for fear of crippling embarrassment.

He made his way up the steps into Candlehearth Hall, and only then let her stand on her two feet.

“We’ve made it, I assume you’d like to be upright when getting a bed.”

She hummed in response, still clinging to him tightly.

He held the door for her as they walked to the bar.

“Two beds.” Vilkas slid the septims to the woman.

“I’m sorry to say we don’t have two beds available, just one.”

Vilkas turned to Y/n, who was half asleep on his arm.

“That will do just fine, do you happen to have an extra fur-”

The woman stared at Y/n, then back to Vilkas.

“You sure you need two?”

He despised the way that the warmth crept to his ears.

“I’m certain.”

The woman tried to contain her reactions, but simply resigned to gesturing a hand toward the rooms, and walked ahead of the two in leading them to the available room.

"Enjoy your stay."

Vilkas nodded to the woman before turning to Y/n, who had already set her pack against the bedframe. She was currently struggling to remove her sheath from her belt.

“Y/n,” he called, already by her side, hands on her sheath.

“Let me. You’re exhausted. Don’t strain yourself, we have a long ride to Whiterun at dawn.”

Her eyes locked with his, hands still firmly gripped on the leather strap.

“Y/n,” there was a soft smile on his lips,” Please, let me take care of you.”

Her hands went slack, and he pulled the sheath from her, leaning it up against the side table. She then stripped from her armor, and Vilkas felt the need to turn away. He began to strip from his own, slipping off his bracers and boots before taking off the heavier pieces.

Vilkas did not turn to Y/n until he was in nothing but a tunic and trousers and saw she was in the same. She sat on the edge of the bed, silently, which would be fine if all she had done was wait for him to finish, but Vilkas could tell this was not the case for his dear Harbinger.

“Y/n… is there anything I can do for you?” His hand grabbed her own, not even thinking as he sat beside her. The wolf of Jorrvaskr softening, his eyes becoming that of a love-sick pup, not the sharp, cold ones she had come to know.

“Vilkas…”

She fell onto him, head pressed to his side, letting out a sigh.

“...I’m terrified.”

He turned to look down at her, an arm finding its way around her shrinking body. With the other, he brushed away loose hairs.

“What is scaring you?”

“That wolf today… That could be me…” Her voice began to waver. “It is not you.” His grip tightened around her.

“But Vilkas-”

“You are not a monster. You have never been one. Nor will you ever be. Do you remember the first time you shifted?”

He felt her tears fall onto his hand, and heard her cry out a weak “no”.

He rubbed her shoulder,” You didn’t attack anyone. You seemed to be aware of your surroundings. Didn’t hurt a single person.”

“Really?” She sniffled.

“Really. Our gentle Harbinger. A true alpha. You protect the weak and never lead us astray.”

She turned to him and stared at him closely.

“Just, Vilkas, I…”

He gave her arm a squeeze.

“I hate the beast blood…”

“I know, I know…”

“I want it gone!” She sobbed, burying her head in Vilkas’s chest.

“I know my dear… There have been rumors you know…”

He ran a hand through her hair.

“Rumors that there is a cure to lycanthropy… I’ve been trying for proof, and I will not rest until I have an answer for you.”

His heart melted at the way her eyes lit up, this smothered light finally beginning to find that spark again.

“I want to help you.”

“By all means, you may, but I’m doing this for you regardless. Should you want it, that is.”

“I want to.”

There was a smile on her face again, such a smile he hadn’t seen in months. Gods above, if he could see this every day, Vilkas would give up anything. She was a refreshing aura, a rejuvenating one. She could ask him to leash the wind, and by the gods, he’d find a way, if it meant he’d get to see but a glimpse of that smile.

“Then we’ll find it together. But Y/n, you need your rest. You take the bed. I’ll sleep by the door-”

He stood up, hand resting against the hilt of his blade that he had leaning against the bed.

“You don’t have to Vilkas, the bed is more than big enough to share.” She grabbed the sleeve of his tunic.

He gave a soft laugh, grabbing her hand.

“I’m quite a large man, Y/n. And besides, wouldn’t you mind sleeping beside a man?”

“Not you.”

He tried to stifle a cough.

Blasted woman.

“C’mon, grab that fur. We can share a mattress for a night Vil.”

“Uh, of course. If that’s what you wish.”

“It is.”

There’s that damn smile. By Shor, my heart’s gonna explode.

She sat on the side by the wall, legs tucked underneath her. Y/n was sitting on her knees, hands in her lap, and this beautiful smile was plastered to her face.

“Well, uh, then. I suppose that settles it. Remember we leave at dawn-”

“Vilkas…” she laughed,” just sleep. We will be okay.”

“Very well.”

Vilkas took his fur and draped it over himself, turning to catch a glimpse of Y/n, which made his heart leap.

Shut it you damn heart.

“Goodnight Vilkas,” Y/n murmured, and Vilkas took that as his cue to dim the lantern and try to catch a bit of sleep. After all, they had a big journey ahead of them.

___________________

Whiterun. Finally.

“I’ll race you to the city!” she called, kicking her steed.

“What?! How is this fair!? Y/n!”

But she was already much too ahead.

He huffed and set his horse to a trot, but couldn’t get the prior night out of his head.

Her hands would grab for me in the night… And she looked so peaceful, much calmer than the night I found her at her desk. By Mara, if that could be-

“Snap out of it Vilkas. With your blood, she’ll-”

He sighed and made his way to the city, stopping to drop his horse at the stables, and made his way to the city gate. There stood Y/n, staring at a letter. She held it with tight hands, eyes scanning the page with increasing speed.

“What is that? Y/n.”

“I-It’s from Kodlak. He tried to get it to me when I was in Solsthiem… The courier just got it to me… Vilkas, it's a cure!”

“A cure?”

He saw the shake in her hands and grabbed her shoulder.

“Quick. To Jorrvaskr. I’ll grab my brother, it's time to plan.”

And with a mutual nod, they sped off.

___________________

“Kodlak had mentioned something similar here in his journal, he was definitely looking for a cure, he must’ve sent the letter just before Jorrvaskr was attacked… It doesn’t mention a location though…”

“That’s no matter!”

Vilkas pushed aside the books she had poured through and pointed to a location in the Northwest of Falkreath.

“There’s legends of the Glenmoril Coven. Men have gone missing in this general area historically. If there is any place for these witches to be, it would be here.”

Y/n shot up and placed a kiss on his cheek before marking that area off on the map she kept in her tunic.

“I’ll gather the witch heads, I need you to plot a course for Ysgrammor’s Tomb. By my accounts, it should be up in The Pale.”

Vilkas’s head was still swimming. Did she even realize what she had done? Oh by the Nine, gods above, I love this woman.

He cleared his throat.

“Ugh, and we will need a total of four heads. For Kodlak.”

She smiled.

Gods above…

“Yes for Kodlak. I’ll rid us of all of them, don’t you fret. I’ll get every last one of them. The Companions will soon be bound to Hircine no longer, and Kodlak will get his rest in Sovngarde. Vilkas, you plot the course,” she turned from him to Farkas,” I need you to gather supplies. We need torches, food, furs for us and our mounts, we need maps, poultices, and anything else you would think would be wise to bring.”

“You’ve got it, sister,” he pulled Vilkas in with a headlock,” Vilkas and I will be right on that. You know he would do anything for you-”

“I think that’s enough brother.”

Vilkas pried himself from Farkas, nothing short of embarrassed. He could feel the heat creeping up his neck, and his ears began to burn.

She just laughed, and that did nothing to quell the feelings that plagued him at that moment.

“You boys are certainly brothers.” She shook her head, still laughing. With her hands firm on her hips, Y/n spoke again. “I’m off to meet with the Jarl. We all know what we are up to. I’ll be back in the evening.”

She then left the Harbinger suite with an extra pep in her step, though Vilkas didn’t pay it much attention, as his thoughts were near impossible to quiet.

Farkas turned to his brother.

“Don’t say it,” Vilkas muttered, clearly on edge.

“There’s nothing to say,” the twin replied, and with a grin, he clapped him on the shoulder. “Come, we should drink to celebrate this find.”

“I don’t know, brother. I’m sure I’ll need more time to go over these maps, go to the Jarl’s library-”

“We can just stay in the Hall?”

Farkas offered an encouraging look.

“Who could say no to such an offer?”

The man grinned, throwing an arm over his often grumpier twin.

“That’s what I like to hear.”

___________________

It had ended up being a very long night of drinking in Jorrvaskr. And despite this fact, evening had come and gone and Y/n had still not returned for the night. It was honestly the only reason that Vilkas had stuck around the hall that night. Aela had been incredibly obnoxious that night, scolding the twins on their desire for a cure, claiming that it was a blessing and sacred tradition. No amount of historical fact could bring her off her conclusion.

“The Circle has been bound by such tradition for well over a hundred years!”

“And the Companions have not held the tradition for hundreds! It’s what Kodlak wanted for us-”

“Still bending a knee to the old man, Vilkas. He’s in the eternal hunt now. That’s the life he chose, as have you. You should accept your choices as Skjor and I have.”

The conversation remained vague, as non-Circle members were sat around, and under Y/n’s leadership, had still not been informed on the secrets of the Circle.

“Sister, it is not wrong to take charge of your life-”

Farkas tried to support his brother, but Aela was quicker.

“But you cannot change your destiny.”

She thankfully laid off then. After things had ended in debate and poured drink, most had gone to their beds, but Vilkas still waited. It was nearly driving Tilma mad.

“Boy, off to bed with you. I’m sure that girl of yours will warm your bed soon.”

He couldn’t figure out a rebuttal to the matriarch, with the alcohol making his mind swim and the wolf within fighting for control.

“You can clean up around me Tilma… or just go get some rest…”

The woman scoffed but pulled away the various dishes and reset the chairs while Vilkas began to drift off, head still facing the doors, just waiting for his beloved Harbinger to return.

___________________

He didn’t even hear the door open when she returned.

“Oh Vil, you should’ve gone to bed…”

He felt her hand run through his hair, and he sighed at her touch.

“I ‘s waiting for you…”

“I know Vil, c’mon. To bed with you…”

She held her hand out to the sleepy Nord. He gladly took it and used way too much force to get himself up off the chair, but Y/n didn’t even flinch.

“You’re strong…”

“I thought you knew that already Vil. I was taught by the best,” she winked, but it didn’t phase him.

He didn’t notice the burlap sack slung across her body until they were just feet from his door.

“Where’s that from?”

“Oh, from Dragonsreach. I’ll return it to the kitchens tomorrow. I just needed to borrow it for tonight. This one is yours,” she handed him a scroll,” Goodnight Vilkas!”

She tied a similar scroll to Farkas’s door and then waved at Vilkas as he walked into his room. Curiosity caught the wolf and broke him from his tired mind.

Sir Vilkas of Jorrvaskr

That alone took him aback.

You are hereby invited to a ball at Dragonsreach, in honor of the Dragonborne, Y/n L/n, for her heroics five odd years ago.

His brain could not calm itself, so as if he was no longer in control of his body, he found his way to Y/n.

“Vilkas? Is something the matter-” She stared, face scrunched in worry.

“I wouldn’t miss your event for the world.”

Her face returned to a peaceful medium… and one could say well… He slept well that night.

#vilkas x reader #vilkas x dragonborn #vilkas x dovahkiin #vilkas fic #vilkas #vilkas skyrim #skyrim fic #tes #skyrim #skyrim fanfiction #vilkas of jorrvaskr #vilkas x female reader #vilkas x f!reader #martindeservedbetter #martindeservedbetter fic #here's that vilkas fic! pt 2 is a wip

3 notes · View notes