lifeasabarista-blog
Life As A Barista
Green apron-wearing barista working mostly closing shifts part-time.
375 posts
Don't wanna be here? Send us removal request.
Last Seen Blogs
aclasstreesolutions
A Class Tree Solutions
annilanaia
passa ogni gioia
annilanaia
passa ogni gioia
d-cay
🫀
pcwpolwrestling
Political Championship Wrestling
Text
WHEN THAT ONE SERVER COMPLAINS ABOUT BEING BROKE BUT IS THE FIRST ONE TO GIVE UP THEIR SHIFT
I’M JUST LIKE:
267 notes
·
View notes
Text
The next person who says "I'll have a PSL" is going to be forcibly removed from the premises.
#you think you're cool but you're not#you're not even saving yourself time#starbucks problems#barista problems#pumpkin spice latte#this is a queue
30 notes
·
View notes
Photo
Starbucks employees doing Halloween correctly
89K notes
·
View notes
Text
Frodo
Frodo goes up to the counter and tries and fails to order a cup of tea. Samwise, who is accompanying him, says, “Master Frodo will have a grande green tea with room for cream, please.” The barista hands the cup to Frodo, and the entire shop cheers. “Huzzah!” they cry. “Look at Frodo Baggins, ordering that cup of tea all by himself!” Later, Sam puts out a fire in the kitchen and Frodo is given the Presidential Medal of Freedom.
17K notes
·
View notes
Text
random tip for taking drive-thru calls when not at your till: visualize the drink/item as you repeat it back to the customer; you'll remember more before you have to go running back to the expeditor.
Do you have any special techniques for remembering large orders?
7 notes
·
View notes
Text
Customer: Can I get a Pumpkin Frappuccino but hot?
I can’t.
70 notes
·
View notes
Text
Whoever said “There’s no such thing as a stupid question” clearly never worked with the general public.
432 notes
·
View notes
Conversation
Me: "Hi, how are you?"
Customer: "INEEDAGRANDESOYCARAMELMACCHIATOSUGARFREEEXTRACARAMELNOFOAM"
Me: "How are you?"
Them: "OHANDEXTRAHOT"
Me: "How are you?"
704 notes
·
View notes
Text
e.e. cummings
up
e.e. cummings g o e s
to the counter &orders
an icedvanillalatte
he
sits.
waits.
onetwothreefourfive minutes
until the baristalady w h i s t l e s his name—
"how do you like your coffee, mr. poet?"
12K notes
·
View notes
Text
THIS
Starbies partners-
Can we just create some vile “secret menu” items and start spreading them around and see who will come and and order a “blueberry panda” frappé with 11 pumps peppermint, 6 butters, and Worcestershire sauce served upside down in a red bell pepper
385 notes
·
View notes
Text
when you call in to work and your coworker answers the phone in their peppy work voice then realizes its you and goes back to sounding just as dead inside as you are
219K notes
·
View notes
Link
Gather round children, for I am about to drop some goddamn knowledge.
I am a Starbucks Barista. I toil around a espresso machine the size of a fucking car, I go into battle with temperamental blenders and customers alike, I burn my self and cut myself daily, all so I can deliver you delicious…
352 notes
·
View notes
Note
One of my shifts is the most amazing badass. She's a great barista, but also just a badass. After close we're literally walking out the door and some guy says, "I just need something real quick," and pushes his way inside before she can re-lock the door. She says, "Come on," and drags me back in and I'm like, "What? We're making this jerk something?" Nope. She just waited for the alarm to go off (so f-ing loud), smiled sweetly at him, and said, "We're closed. Have a nice night. Goodbye."
45 notes
·
View notes
Text
Lemony Snicket
Lemony Snicket goes up to the counter and orders a caffé Americano. It is bitter. The barista is armed. The man in the corner has poisoned someone’s drink. The espresso machine is on fire. Lemony Snicket begins to run down the street as the Starbucks explodes. He is being chased. He spills his coffee.
19K notes
·
View notes
Conversation
Me: Sorry about the wait, we're just recalibrating the shots so your drink doesn't taste gross.
Drive-thru customer: Really. Well I've been waiting in line for 22 minutes.
Me: Mmm, nope. The screen says 6 minutes. Nice try. But hey, looks like our decaf shots don't need any calibrating!
#how i wish this conversation had actually gone tonight#i just would really like to call some customers on their bullshit#starbucks problems#barista problems#drive-thru problems#rude customers
117 notes
·
View notes
Text
rightbackwhereyouleft replied to your post:Okay, seriously, what is this Franken Frappuccino...
Green tea frap, white mocha, peppermint, java chips, mocha drizzle. All rung up separately, plus a discount count. Fuck our lives.
Right? And I don't know about you, but the discount code isn't even activated yet at my store. Found out after someone ordered it. Because, you know, there's this great big sign advertising them.
3 notes
·
View notes
Text
Okay, seriously, what is this Franken Frappuccino business. How is this legal.
#starbucks problems#barista problems#frappuccino#if this is some twisted secret menu bs i'm going to tear all my hair out
22 notes
·
View notes