Homemade butter! Yummy! (at Leicester, United Kingdom) https://www.instagram.com/p/CRYl7qCBTV2/?utm_medium=tumblr

Baking bread! (at Leicester, United Kingdom) https://www.instagram.com/p/CRWwxFgBCM4/?utm_medium=tumblr

Boredom is setting in. It's a beautiful day. But no cash to eat means no energy to enjoy it. Weak. Sitting in home. Running out of resources. There's nothing to do but watch TV. Drink tea and sleep.

The Duke of Edinburgh has died on Friday. The TV yesterday was all in honour of him. We all feel for our Queen. Although at a good age of 99 she probably half expected it, she will be lonely in the Palace and will miss him dreadfully. I think we can all relate to that.

Things have been hard lately. Battling mental health issues. Helping my son back on his feet. Days seem shorter. Although I am waking earlier. The daily routines I have are habitual. To the point where one part of the routine is executed and then into the next and before you know where you are. It's bed time and the day is done. Each day I promise to do more tomorrow, but tomorrow never comes. Well I didn't promise entry every day. I do tend to withdraw from life. Routines and habits as well as housework gets laid to one side. But just like most of my diaries. Writing down my thoughts and issues is just going over old rope.

It's been a hard day. I've felt like a train wreck all day. And had kayleigh over. Smoke alarms keeping me awake all night. I'm done. So much for an early night too. 2am nearly and all I've eaten is a round of toast all day. I do hope not going down hill again. But I think once Chris gets home the stress levels will drop. I don't deal with it as I used to. So perhaps a bath and a good night's sleep is what I need. I will do the sleep thing now And I'll have a bath tomorrow. Note to self... Stay off Netflix tomorrow and get some housework done too.

Chris is still in hospital. He's not coming home for another 2 days. Can't wait to get him home. A smoke alarm on the 6th floor has only just stopped ringing since 4pm today. I'm knackered. Holding onto reality. I will sleep little and stress more before dawn

So the night before last night. I had 5o call an ambulance out for my eldest son Chris. He had stomach ache and he was sweating also struggling to breathe. He's 31 and never been admitted to hospital before. They wouldn't let me go with him. So the next morning I set to work on his flat. I cleaned it from top to bottom. Took me from 11.30am till 8.30 pm, but It was all I could do to keep busy. I didn't have credit on my phone to contact him and visa versa. So my daughter kept calling him. To keep in contact. I was beysnd worried. Hoping he was not scared or lonely. Today I finally spoke to him. And I went to take him some clothes in. He still wasn't well. I want to hug him but I couldn't. Met my daughter there and then we came back here for a cuppa. I hope Chris realises how much we love him. He has been a rock for us in the past. Now it's time for us to step up to the plate for him.

Didn't manage to avoid the nightmare neighbour today. How come someone can make you feel so uncomfortable in your own home.

A boring day really. I tidied and slept. Ate chicken and chips. Didn't get dressed. Its getting a habit but that's a good thing. That I'm eventually thinking that way. Thinking of life sitting on the sofa has to stop. Instead of finding excuses to stay there. Even looked up a couple of jobs. Feeling good. Sunny day. Perhaps my S. A

D Cloud is lifting. I did notice that although I was hungry and looked forward to eating. I found the food tasteless and a waste of time. I found that with yesterday's food too. But I am still stuffing my face though. MUST GET ACTIVE! I need to start getting out each day again. Perhaps a nap as a reward for being out of the flat for more than 20 mins which can't be carried over.

After my first Pfizer vaccine yesterday. My arm was really stiff and quite hard with swelling around the site, all day. Until 3pm then it started to feel better. I have felt the chills, woozy and a very slight nausea. But it really was a no brainer. I didn't feel a thing when I got it. And for me, the side effects were very minimal. I'm sure tomorrow I will feel fighting fit again. It was a small price to pay to show my friends and family I love them. ♥️♥️♥️

7 hrs since I had my. Pfizer vaccine. I'm feeling OK. A little stiff around the site. Sleepy and a little achey. Head feels a little wooly. But happy. Would like to thank the staff at the Leicester L. R. I. For being on point!

Going for my vaccine today. Have to walk to the hospital. Which is fine. Its the walking back I'm dreading.

Tidy life. Tidy Mind.

Sleepy Sunday. Crisp and fresh bedding. Peaceful city sounds. Including birds and voices that usually get lost in the the daily drone. The ambulances that were constant. Now fewer and a sense of relief. Fresh and nearly clean air, filters through opened window. Cleansing stale thoughts and dusting away cobwebs filled with negativity. Bringing an overwhelming feeling of the freedom. Long hazy days. Summer lays just around the corner. Filled with a sense of mystique and never wanting it to end. Softly and undetected. Even to the eye. Lids close for a while. Dream away city dreamer.

I hate Saturdays 🙄😕

Hiding from the Dude who lives above me. Go away! Leave me alone! You're an utter twat and you take up too much air.