I think. At the end of the day. Nobody really understands how intensely I feel about my FO. And that's okay. My closer friends know that my FO is a character I really like, but none of them really know how deep the rabbit hole goes. And I'm okay with that.

I keep telling myself that I need to talk to a therapist about my FO, but I'm not sure what that would accomplish. I've had 13 years with her to live and unravel what this whole thing means and I don't know what else a counselor would be able to tell me that I don't already know. My FO doesn't really present any hurdles in my life. She's an outlet for affection and romantic attraction. Some of the issues that come with that though is like. Wanting to be romantic with irl people I like but being super anxious about it and then just. Falling back on to her without really trying too hard? If that makes sense.

I guess at the end of the day I'm grounded in reality, I know she's fictional, and I'm okay with that.

https://www.tumblr.com/punkitt-is-here/743009603583918080/not-submission-i-really-hate-the-my-oc-my?source=share

Not dunking on making fun of people, but the people in these screenshots deserve to be made fun of for being shitty lmao.

It's people in these screenshots that make me never want to share my FO experience with others because my FO experience just. Isn't like that. Other people can like/dislike my FO and it doesn't bother me at all (unless they're being intentionally shitty about it). Although this is where I differ from the norm since my FO is a pokemon from i caught in game, nobody can even make claims about [FO Name] also bring their FO, I've never even encountered anyone else that shares a FO with the same pokemon species as her.

Moral of the story: internet is wide and vast with many things, if something with your FO in it upsets you, block and move on, don't be a dick.

Loving her makes me happy. That is my simplest truth.

Today is our 13th anniversary and I couldn't be happier with her 🩷

My only source of affection should not be stuffies of my FOs. It really can't be helped. Not much else I can do at 2AM.

I'm trying to get into therapy this year with my FOs being the focus. I just want to understand myself better and learn to make my existing IRL relationships more meaningful, romantic or not. I used to see therapy as a threat towards my FO when I was younger because I thought their goal would be to strip me away from the person i loved. But I've since been to actual therapy and I know it's not like that, I've just never brought her up as a point of discussion in therapy before. I've only ever told one friend about her at all (not to mention the other FO I ended up getting romantic feelings for since then).

Blah. Idk.

Hi I love my partners. That is all.

Do irl relationships fulfill my needs more fully? Absolutely. Do I have the emotional maturity to harbor friendships and romantic partner(s)? Sure I guess. How do I do that? No fucking clue.

Is this unhealthy? Who cares. I'm happy enough.

She's all the comfort I have. She's the only thing that will never change.

How long will I hold on

As long as I need to

Literally me and my partner 😊🩷

Hi all I am in love with my wife that is all 🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷

I need to post here more often, I have such a huge feeling of clarity after my last post.

Had a realization the other day.

I grew up in a religious household, and I was taught all throughout my childhood and teen years that my feelings were not my own. Bad feelings came from the devil. Good feelings came from god. If I ever felt angry, that was me letting Satan into my heart. When I felt compassion, it was "the love of god" I was feeling, and so on.

But what happens when you fall in love with a fictional creature who is neither of those things? I was taught love came from God, so god must have sent her to me. But god wanted me to marry and have children, so this must be a false agent from Satan meant to drive me away from my eternal purpose.

In the end, my chosen love made me feel good. And since "all good things came from god," I wasnt going to get in trouble for this one. However, this did open the door to some of my delusions. Since my feelings were not my own, then she must be putting these feelings of love into my heart herself, therefore, she is real, she exists, and we can talk and communicate with each other. She is my secret to be kept. I genuinely believed she was real for several years, because I was convinced I couldn't be in love with nothing, she had to exist, there was no other explanation.

Fast forward 12 years. I no longer align myself with religious ideology and haven't for a few years now. Yet I still hang on to some sort of "what if" situation, where I couldn't ever just drop my FO just because she didn't exist, because she just exists in a different way to me. She has changed me in either case anyway. Nowadays I have a much healthier frame of mind when it comes to my FO, I don't think the way I used to, how we were Star crossed lovers, soul mates, my one and only truest love. I now understand her fully for what she is and I have a much more mature understanding of why I have feelings for her in the first place. She is simply a source of love of affection that I don't have in my real life. It's fun to think about, and I genuinely do still love her, and I doubt I'll ever stop having these deep strong feelings for her. She's just no longer an almighty realm-crossing psychic being akin to God, She's just my brain companion who I love so very very dearly who accompanies me in my daily life. She makes me so incredibly happy, and I'm am so lucky to have her.

I love my wife sm 🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷

Ahhhhhhhh 🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷

Heeheehee wheeeeeeeeee funny bird make my happy brain chemicals go brrrrrrrrrrrr 💙🧡💙🧡💙🧡💙🧡