flamingmusicalroses
~I'm an eternal flame, baby ~
♌-- Catch me winning a grammy soon--
I also kinda play violin
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CURATING APPS
Text
A dragon entered the cave.
A cave full of life,
A darkness surrounding what could have been.
Flowers beginning to bloom
Turned into ash as it blew.
Hope for life
Killed.
Hope.
Now fear and darkness.
There is no hope.
The cave will never live
For the dragon refuses to leave.
Now these days go
With darkness in control.
The visitors it used to attract
leave like lightning.
Whoosh,
Life that was about to grow,
Life that had taken years to develop,
All life is gone.
No hope.
Just a dragon
Claiming what is theirs
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My sincerest apologies
I know I won’t be able to express this.
I know you won’t be able to understand this.
But from the deepest cove in my heart,
I give you my sincerest
Love.
I have loved you.
Forever and as long as time will last.
I know this isn’t goodbye
But I can’t help feel this way.
I rarely express it.
But I love you
For you gave me
Memories.
Never shall I forget
The smiles you gifted me,
The songs we sang,
The jokes we shares.
Forever shall I think
Of us hiding behind a door
And someone would speak of a funny wolf,
Of us sitting on a bench
Passing a ball
So I would grow stronger
And you would grow happiness.
In return I must give you
Sorry.
Sorry for creating an ocean.
Sorry for creating a wall.
Sorry for never running to our fortress.
Sorry for never creating time as I grew old.
I am sorry.
I am deeply sorry.
Now, I can only watch
As you walk on to share your love.
And with this
I’ll return no worry and
Happiness.
I will make sure to strive.
I will make sure to live.
I will make sure to be happy.
I know you don’t want to see be sad,
There are days I won’t be able to help it,
But I’ll forever think
Of your dreams
Which I shall grant
As I live happily.
Thank you for so many years.
These are my sincerest emotions.
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It’s hard to speak
When your trapped inside a jail,
An enclosed box you know so well.
Surrounded by disillusionment
And a cycle of disappointment,
Who’d try to help
when you raise your voice to yell?
This pendulum is one that won’t stop.
Gravity nor time nor the kinetic energy it has
May reverse it’s motion and force it to yield.
You may be surprised at its sudden force:
One day it’s
Calm and unimpressed by the world it lives,
Then the next it’s
An ocean with waves continuously eating itself.
No one knows when it will change.
No one knows when it will stay.
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As I look into the past
I can’t help but to think
About our memories
And how they wouldn’t last.
Now, I can’t help but to think
about how your hand would constantly flee,
Running from my heart
And all the times i tried to please.
You
You took my love
In a way that no one did.
But there you were
Setting the rook
To defeat my reining king.
I couldn’t believe that you
Would grab your sword and en garde.
Now next thing i know
You’re stabbing my heart.
Well, damn this time that I trusted you.
No more shall it be.
I accept the fact
That I’ve got trapped
And i can’t be me.
One of these days I’ll learn to overcome past your capture.
Return with a flame to torch this pain.
I’ll rise from the ashes
To start my name.
As a Phoenix i’ll live
To defend your heinous face.
In the shadows I’ll lurk.
I’ll stike everyone fear.
You’ve made a wrong choice
So
Here’s checkmate.
I bet you regret making me bleed
So how about some cacophony to make you scream.
The circulatory cries of your coming crimes.
The pendulatory pain of your precious play.
But all in all
I can’t be rude.
So I’ll take Shakespeare’s word
And make kindness my blade.
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Poison, bullets, knives, shards
What do they have in common?
They are all your words
Entering the bodies of your victim.
It’s like you have a plan,
A hit list,
Where each death
Is a new life
You gain.
You treat your puppets like kings
With sweet, golden words on the outside,
But when you sway them inside
It’s hell
And they become shells
With their souls in locked a casket.
The authority of your whip
Slashes deeper wounds on the
Vagabonds who can’t live with the pain.
They’ll continue to escape -
Run away -
Albeit,
They know you’ll find them again.
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So. Here’s the poem i mentioned earlier:
I’d write this in an essay
But i don’t know how to say
That my soul isn’t pure
The way you taught it to pray.
Your dreams of my happiness
Have been “poisoned with such an illness”
Are your words that can’t help
But stab what little is left.
After all the theft,
There is nothing to call
Myself.
I can’t help but want to say goodbye.
Choked, tired, lost
And done
Due to days spent drowning in my thoughts
Or days spent suffocating to this boa.
And yet,
Nothing can, or will be, done about this elephant.
The lion continues to rage
As it’s cage gets small and smaller.
Angry and hungry,
It gives up.
A voice tells him to continue fighting.
It slashes one last time towards its bars
And it’s set free.
Debilitated, disoriented, dispirited.
It steps foot onto the outside world.
It’s accepted the truth.
It can never be the same.
The small fire is alight
Because of its escape
But it’s meeting death
Because if its current state:
Depressed. Alone.
Still tied down
To the
Truth.
However,
Days are worth a fight
Because it can’t help but dream
Of the paradise he may find.
Even after all the malign
He can’t help picture /that day/.
The only way for this journey to end
Is for your acceptance of my pain.
My bane,
My love that i couldn’t help but restrain.
The truth of the matter is the evident colour in my heart.
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My body:
A temple.
He said he gave me this shrine
Upon his image.
So we are told
Not to ruin what’s already precious.
We’re also told
What’s precious is on the inside than the outside.
Then we are told
Only the ones placed on shelves
Are precious
And the rest should
Aspire to be them.
A temple-
A pyramid
Complex with secrets and
Filled with darkness.
An archeologist
Will spend years
Upon years
Stacked in years
Of discovery and research,
With a flame lit torch,
The archeologist
Reveals symbols and passages that say more.
My body-
A dirty mirror
Giving me what I know
And covering what I don’t.
With Windex and a cloth,
The mirror gets cleaned
To show the uniqueness.
It shows the
Uneven balance between
Inside and outside.
The inside is fine,
The inside is the final draft.
The outside.
Worn and torn,
The outside has become victim to war.
The temple doesn’t have meaning anymore.
Construction crews have to help
To support it
They put new paint, new walls, new bricks
And it’s still the same.
The conflict rests
Within the fact
That it doesn’t represent the inside.
My body:
A temple.
It should be defining what it is proud off.
Outside forces came and destroyed.
The old soul wasn’t able to protect.
It let the fires rage.
It let the bombs be placed.
And now it screams.
I have thought
So i have become
me.
The fires are fought.
The bombs have been gone.
But the temple howls as it sits in silence.
The lone temple.
A long fight.
And it just isn’t the same.
The night becomes forever and a day.
Until the sun rises
When it comes to acceptance
Of it’s image
That he gave.
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I’m tired of living this lie.
I know who I am inside,
But these chains bond so tight
I can only be held constrict
And soon hope to die.
Every stepping stone.
Is a mile stone.
One I didn’t hope to reach.
One I didn’t believe would be touched.
One that I’m proud of marking.
Then,
These wounds flow,
Everything seems cold
And the times are infinitely alone.
No matter how proud,
Happy,
Successful,
Everything is dark.
Everyone is gone.
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The fog cant help but distort our vision,
Glimpses of a brighter path are seen
And it can be reached.
The clouds only yell danger,
For lighting may strike wherever you step
And fire may creep onto the feet.
Some days emit the nature of spring,
With a new health acclaimed
And a new happiness gained.
Those days are rare.
Rare like the blood that seeps from the steak.
The blood parallel to the one from her wrists.
The same blood
Poured when the butcher cuts.
Cuts the emotions.
Cuts the line.
Cuts any sense of a prosperity from forty-nine.
Like Queen Isabella,
You purge,
And succeed,
To get what you want.
Are you happy
Holding the ghosts to their demise?
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It’s undulating waves
Forcing to rip terrors in half
Whilst drowning the soul
Whole.
It’s suffocating
Hearing yells left and right
The knowledge of air
Is lost in the burning of Alexandria.
It’s unexplainable
How the body is magnetized
To a bed,
It can’t leave.
Nothing is shot like an arrow,
Rather,
Everything is overheard from a town over.
Yet,
Emotions are easily sensed
And so
The dams brake again.
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Over. And over.
In a whirlpool,
I’m stuck repeating:
Im sorry.
Im sorry
Im sorry
Im so damn sorry.
It’s taken too long for me to find safety
And im sorry.
Im sorry it isn’t the walls you wanted me to build.
Im sorry my happiness
Isn’t yours.
Im sorry my silent words
Don’t reach your ears.
If I scream,
Im scared of the storm.
You’ve given me glimpses,
And im terrified.
Im sorry.
Im really. Really. Sorry.
You don’t understand how sorry I am.
I wish I could paint the way you taught.
But all I am is
A failure of a student.
Im sorry it will never go right.
Im sorry I can’t bring you joy.
It’s okay for you to stab me
Because the mirror does the same.
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Sitting in the dark,
Cold and alone,
Reaching for help
Is something no one will know.
It bites and numbs,
But the fire is lit.
Yet the constant war
Verdicts that the mind is
lost in an abyss.
No one will know.
It’s perfectly fine,
The devil says we will quickly die.
The angel .
.
.
It softly whispers and yells
Only to be silence by everything black.
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Mi amiga,
Una querida.
Someone that I wish I hadn’t known,
Someone who’s time i wish had froze.
You were cold
I tried to stay bold
Yet nothing can heal what’s sore.
I cant believe
The yearning in my soul,
The same soul that told me to run
The same soul that told me to kill those memories with that poisonous gun.
My friend,
A beloved one.
A stranger,
A ghost.
A slap of wind that enlightened
And soon
The fire that fueled all my hate.
Im glad you’re gone
But why must I
Wish you had stayed.
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I’m afraid to write that you don’t understand
this is something that even I can’t brand,
the emotions and these thoughts
They’re a poison-
they’re a poison-they killed
they killed my soul and they killed my heart.
Months.
Years.
Contemplation was the only thing I had known,
The thing that made me say:
“I have the power to kill,
i could —”
the time came and the options laid in vain.
Goodbye to this test
because I knew I’d never rest.
A greater voice had come
with the power of love,
the power of joy,
the power of something I hadn’t been taught.
So
Here I stand,
like the statue reminding the people of potential power
to overcome
I climbed and climbed
to the today of tomorrow.
So
Going back,
rereading the pages of the past,
being told to relive those moments.
I’m afraid to write that you don’t understand.
The days of yesterday,
they were a cage that I will never name.
The ink that was spilled,
it is meant to forget.
Yes, the letters can still be seen,
because I know it still makes
me
who overcame and overcomes.
me
who has found a new reason to run
me.
Running forward and never back.
I’ll jump those hurdles.
I’ll win the gold.
But never.
please.
never
please
Don’t put me back.
Removing the freedom of someone who has flown.
It’s being stranded at sea,
no food or water to be seen.
It’s being choked,
knowing the person can stop
but knowing that there will be no more breaths to breathe.
It’s being locked in a room all alone,
four walls and a bed
slowly, and surely, becoming brain dead.
I’m afraid to write you don’t understand.
but this is it
so
please.
please
please
don’t put me back.
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- Wanda, you have no children. They don’t exist.
- But they do. In every other universe.
Doctor Strange in the Multiverse of Madness (2022), dir. Sam Raimi
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Doctor Strange in the Multiverse of Madness (2022), dir. Sam Raimi
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FLORENCE PUGH as Paige in FIGHTING WITH MY FAMILY (2019)
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