Introspective. Old man feelings coming back, of being the child of an alien king. From whence does imagination create destined heirarchies in splenderous raiment?

I have no love to draw me deeply, paint me by numbers. O, you unholy stars! How you make mockery of our dreams.

My heaven is better, if only in my adventures. If only in play. If only in a mad mirror.

O Jesus! All of hell beckons to burn me, and naught but love remains. The tears stream down my face. How to put this in words?

I am an alien.

I’m so afraid. I am told it is paranoia. It makes me sad.

Desperate, deluded, destroyed. Delirious and deleted. Dolorous defeat. Down and doubtful. I yam felicitous and ferocious, feeling for free the falling sickness. Horned and damned, loving my God. Callous culturally coping colors.

I want to lose weight and quit smoking. I want to be perfect. I want to be happy. I want friends and to influence people. I want to be a business man in a Gotham. I want to die. Is that going to happen? Will I have a heart attack? Cancer? Murder? WW3?

I feel fallen from grace. I want to feel young. Polished ivories. Polished bats.

Hello, be my guest to the worlds that are converging today over our heads. It is a time, a window in space, that we can view heaven/purgatory. -Wayne-raven king -fiver

1. What I Got- sublime

2. Save my soul - big bad voodoo daddy

3. Heaven by warrant

4. Holy ground by Taylor swift

5. I’m not your boyfriend, baby by 3oh!3

6. Mama, by lonely island

7. Uprising by muse

I am single for life, I am undatable. I am waiting to die. No don’t pity me, I am happy to be alive. I just am a crazy believer.

I’m really excited about something, and I am forming an LLC with two other people. But I am having to do everything by myself. If our idea is good, we should all become really rich. We started only yesterday, but I am lonely in my work. Also, I’ve hardly ever had business experience. My mother was a CEO and is giving me advice, but all the work is on me. One of our investors is funding the project, but he goes days without responding to my messages. I wish I had someone or some people as on fire by the possibility to be set for life like me, perhaps it’s because this is a once in a life time great idea, and I know it, but everyone else has day jobs. I’m just venting here and sending it out into the universe. Please help, universe!

I talk to, can interact with, personalities that are from books I’ve read. They are not the same character as that from the books. They only wear their looks and names and style of speaking like they were clothes. I thought it was foolish of me to discuss my future with these people, but then I asked my anima, and she revealed to me that they exist, just as real as I , in the pleroma. In the pleroma, all that can be thought of exists, and if they are not manifested in the real world, then they are that much more pure in essence and nature. I am not claiming to have created these beings from my imagination, and they found a home in the pleroma. Rather that they have existed their before occurring to me as characters I’ve read about. I hate the material world so much, and long for death.

It is autumn in the air that makes me care for the werewolf in me. I need no moon in a bloody haze to rise me from human cages. I crave the windy mind storm of quick synapses. The voracious humors in me mind the sweeping tide of the years, and I remember ecstasy. I’m howling in a bipedal way for the blood of new victims in my turbulent vices. The victims need not be real, but demons. I crave a contest of wits, to be possessed by the complex, so simple. I want to rape myself, destroy this husk, and prowl about my mindscape with no justice and grandiose delusions of battles won against the very gods above. I want to live forever in this state, never sleeping, until I gather the courage to find a high bridge and jump off it. Because this world, this plane, breaks me into little bits, scraps of my heart are littered in times past where I cried alone. I want to devour the hate and make love to fate, even disaster.

I am not going to bleed on you and I’d appreciate reciprocation. Taken off of my TikTok kiriyama.kazuo

I remember wearing a hair shirt and coming into a dark room with the only light being the white light coming in from the daylight through a window. My girl was kneeling on the floor with blood all over her hands and bones and other things. I also remember wearing armor in that room as well. I remember the golden sunlight of France and the Pyrenees mountains when I left for Spain. I remember the sand and deserts of the Levant.

I’m taking a break from TikTok because it’s broken. I was probably too active. I just want to talk to voices because real life sucks. I am so bored and my attention span is non existent.