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Friday Dance Party
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You gotta honor the cock
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The Legendary Adventures of the Bad Kids: Entries in the Legend Lore Database*
Adaine Abernant:
Latest in the line of Elven Oracles
Current wielder of the Sword of Sight, Sword of the Elven Oracle
She who invoked the name of Ankarna and broke Obliviati Mori
Kristen Applebees:
Formerly the Chosen of Helio, God of Corn
The Creator of Yes!/Yes?
She who Resurrected Herself
The Blessed Saint of Cassandra, Deity of Mystery, Night and Magic
Figueroth Faeth:
Mortal daughter of Gorthalax the Insatiable, Prince of the Nine Hells and former ruler of the Bottomless Pit
Current Archdevil of Rebellion, Figueroth the Infaethable, the Dark Mistress of the Bottomless Pit
Riz Gukgak:
Fifth of the World of Spyre to summon the Night Yorb to the Material Plane
He who slayed the Dragon Kalvaxus, Emperor of the Red Waste
Fabian Aramais Seacaster:
Mortal son of William "Old Bill" Seacaster, Legendary Pirate and the Current Captain of the Infernal Wastes, Scourge of the Nine Hells
Grandson of Telemaine Lomenelda, swordsmith of the Elven Kings
He who killed William "Old Bill" Seacaster
Current wielder of Fandrangor, Sword of the North Star
Dance Champion of the Elven Oracle, the Oracle of Dance
Gorgug Thistlespring:
Creator of the Barbificer Specialty, the first in the World of Spyre to combine barbarian rage and artificer spellcasting
Currently has the Night Yorb sealed in his personal vehicle, the Hangvan
The Bad Kids (Adventuring Party):
Defeated Kalvaxus, Emperor of the Red Waste
Ended the Nightmare King's Curse on Sylvaire
Defeated the Nightmare King, the King of the Dark Dreaming
Defeated the Cult of the Night Yorb
Defeated the Night Yorb
The first adventuring party in living memory to survive the Last Stand-ard Exam with no party/proctor fatalities
*Updates with corrections as legendary statuses of individuals are verified
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Endless Fantasy High
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Lucy Fostblade keeps being more and more doomed by the narrative as we go on.
She went to the mountains of chaos with her friend where all of them were introduced to this rage god where they went with a teacher they trusted. She was probably told this was Ruvina's sibling. Someone who probably made her adopt the domain of sorrow along with winter experiencing her siblings loss more deeply.
She decided to help. Handed in papers with a name she could not yet read in hopes of sharing some of the burden of this sorrow with a god she truly cared about. But the only way to come back as a believer of the rage god was to die.
Only in death did she realise that this is not the sibling her god loved. This is not the sibling she wanted to bring back. This is not the sibling who will bring her solace. So she denied revival. She accepted death because she knew that to not will mean more pain to Ruvina. She decided to stay in purgatory, not reuniting with her or coming back, until a girl in a tie-dye shirt allowing them a place with Cassandra. That too with a power of a god she loved and was struggling as well.
And yet. She has to watch as her friends fight and fight and fight getting angrier by the second to revive a tainted version of dawn that she died to keep in bay.
She's so tragic my heart aches
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friendly reminder
everybody do the Wenis
(the Wenis is a dance)
everybody is a genius / who knows it in advance
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such a dumb fucking pun. i love him
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I don't think Buddy asks Helio any questions.
Kristen asked 'Why do bad things happen to good people?' because she believed in all the good things she was taught, but noticed the strange disconnect between the world as it was and the world as it was taught to her. So she thought, surely, if I can't come up with the answer, Helio will have it. And she hates him for dodging her question.
Buddy is far more deluded than Kristen ever was. And he is far, far angrier inside as a result, even if he deliberately conceals this fact from himself to protect himself from the inevitable mental breakdown this would cause. Buddy is not as altruistic and giving and caring as Kristen is. He wouldn't question why he was betrayed or dig into a question like 'Why do bad things happen to good people?' Those aren't the answers he needs, because of course he'd be betrayed by someone outside the church, that makes perfect sense. Of course bad things happen to good people, we simply live in a fallen world.
Or, well. He used to live in a fallen world. Now he's dead here. In Helio's divine domain.
I think Buddy, as he wanders through fields of corn to the big farmhouse where Helio is chilling out, privately thinks about the fact that Kristen Applebees' horrified expression was the last thing he ever saw before a sharp pain in his throat. I think Buddy assumes Helio knows he's thinking this and apologizes for bringing thoughts like that into paradise. I think he thanks Helio for recognizing his devotion and bringing him here once he died and dutifully deceives himself about his own rising emotions at contending with the fact that he's dead now.
After all, he was raised to die. He was raised to want to die.
To want to be here with his god whenever it was he called Buddy to him. So he doesn't feel upset, no, of course not. He's just a little surprised at how sudden it was. (How completely random. How unceremonious and unfair.) He's a little bit worried how his grandparents would react to the news is all. (He cracks a joke that maybe he'll see them here shortly after they do get the news. He doesn't laugh at it.) He had his own plans for how he'd spread the good word in life, but of course, Helio had other plans. (Nothing Buddy ever wanted really mattered. He knew that, he knew the will of Helio was the real thing that mattered, and everything else was just a small list of preapproved extracurriculars in the syllabus of his life.)
He can't be upset about this.
He shouldn't be upset about this.
This is his reward.
This place and these people and this god are his reward for a life of service and devotion and walking in the light.
It's not his place to be upset about his own reward. Kristen got upset when she went to heaven, when she met Helio, and look where that got her.
Look... look where that got her.
He thinks he hates her. For looking at him like that. All the ways she looked at him. Like he was something pitiful and contemptible. Someone she needed to threaten away from her little brother. Someone she has to double and triple check if he's going to revive her when he's under magical oath to do just that or lose his connection to a divinity she threw away after being chosen.
And then. In that last moment, she looked at him and he saw grief and horror and caring. Like his death was awful and unfair and tragic.
And he thinks maybe he hates her for that. For challenging him every conversation they had and looking at him like she knew something he didn't. Like she was above him. Like killing your own god twice in life is a preferable fate to living for the promise of eternal sunlight and cornbread in death. A promise which was kept to him.
Kristen was promised to Helio, too.
And he can't unsee her face. He can't move along and focus on what truly matters (Helio, the church, spreading the word, doling out divine punishment when needed) because he's reached the end. There is nothing left. Only this bright sunny cornfield and a god who... is nice. And who cares about him, personally. He got Buddy's name wrong the first and only time they held audience.
He thinks he hates Kristen, and he hates that that hatred isn't immediately squashed out of his soul just by being here. In paradise. Where he belongs. Where every follower of Helio belongs. Where he never has to have anyone look at him the way Kristen did ever again.
I don't think Buddy Dawn asks Helio any questions. Because how do you ask the god you devoted every waking minute of your life to, 'Why do I hate it here? Why does this feel like hell?'
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óisín when your blue scaly hand ripped kipperlilly out of the arena you might as well have ripped out my heart with her
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actual real life footage of the surprised condition
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buddy dawn cannot raise himself from the grave.
buddy dawn is not a chosen one.
buddy dawn is a child.
buddy dawn was manipulated by organized religion through no fault of his own, most likely since he was born.
buddy dawn had his throat slit by people he probably considered good friends.
buddy dawn is kristen applebees in a different—worse—life.
buddy dawn is dead, and there’s a good fucking chance helio won’t answer his questions.
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I feel personally betrayed by Oisin actually 🥲
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take a walk with me. come with me. Ratgrinders side campaign? Ratgrinders full side campaign tonight perhaps?
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Two things. 1. Brennan was such a perfect pull for this I wonder how different it would have been with grant.
2. I have never in my life seen "Brennan Mulligan" and my brain cannot absorb it. That's not a real name. I know it's technically correct but also no
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Y'all think the fantasy high universe has fantasy tumblr lol
(inspired by @orions-garden who had this idea first !)
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🐀 stealthcheck reblogged steelwindstrike
⚡ steelwindstrike Follow
you guys remember that trend from last spring where everyone was posting these random videos and pictures of and saying there was a tabaxi woman in there LMAO What the fuck was that 😂 it was like a worse version of The Gown thing from years ago
⚡ steelwindstrike
#LMAOOOO I FORGOT ABOUT THAT #wasnt that a marketing scheme for that one teen band #im pretty sure it was
LMAO WAS IT? i wouldnt be surprised LOL
🐴 princessthehorse Follow
THERE WAS LITERALLY A TABAXI IN ALL OF THOSE VIDEOS. THEY WERE LIKE REALLY SCARY VIDEOS. WHAT WAS EVERYONE ON ABOUT. WHAT FERNS WERE Y'ALL FUCKING ON
🔮 conjurdivination Follow
OP, I understand your confusion but that was very much a real event! Turns out that tabaxi was the Shadow Cat, the familiar of the Nightmare King who was actually an ancient goddess of Sylvaire who was transubstantiated into a disease. She could only be seen by people who had her disease, which was transmitted through various bodily fluids. The Court of Stars has also been putting out statements lately saying that they and other members of the Fallinel government worked with the Shadow Cat, but had nothing to do with her plot of trying to bring back the Nightmare King, since she apparently worked with them as well.
⚡ steelwindstrike
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⚡ steelwindstrike
Was it still those fucking kids who did all that though
🐀 stealthcheck
it was those fucking kids
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🦇 nightmarekwing reblogged powerofsol
🦇 nightmarekwing
was just waiting for a meeting with my banker and i watch two teenagers show up and one puts a gun to his head and the other grabs his balls. I'm so done with adventurers bro, how the fuck do people allow this shit
🦇 nightmarekwing
One of the teenagers is the archdevil of the bottomless pit. i swear to god i'm gonna die and even Hell is gonna be a piece of shit because of adventurers
☀️ powerofsol Follow
Did you not do anything to try and help your banker?????
🦇 nightmarekwing
no why would i help a banker
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🧚‍♀️ tiredaasimar
I have insider information on the Central Solesian Area Polycule
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🔍 detectiveagent5353 reblogged alwayshappyhour
❤️ 123fantasydestiel Follow
I cannot BELIEVE that there are FELLOW STUDENTS here at Aguefort who are SERIOUSLY considering voting for Kristen Applebees for class president. Are you out of your mind? Kipperlilly Copperkettle is actually trying to campaign to make the school better for all of us when we've all seen firsthand how messed up everything is. She's actually trying to make it fair for us students, and what does Kristen want to do? Nothing! She has literally ZERO campaign promises that mean ANYTHING for the school and the only things she talks about are steelworkers of all things and a thing NOBODY knows. NOBODY KNOWS WHAT FETTY WAP IS! I looked it up and looked through every book in the library! THOSE WORDS HAVE NEVER BEEN SAID BEFORE! NEVER!
All I'm saying is if this school starts to go downhill because you all thought it was funnier to vote for the cleric who killed her god TWICE than the regular student who's ACTUALLY trying to make the school better, you all better realize that it's your fault.
🌃 alwayshappyhour
sounds like someone's salty they can't do a shrimp jump
🔍 detectiveagent5353
256.927.723.142
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🐗 recklessattakk
my hungry ass could never be a cleric
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boggyandmoggy reblogged thistleficer
🐦 infernobirds Follow
reblog to cast healing word on the person you rbed this from
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burntownsgetvans reblogged falloutboimaniac
🐉 burntownsgetvans
does anyone know what's going on with fig and the cig figs? i've been waiting for their new album for a while but their social media account has been radio silent, like fig and gorgug are still posting on their personal accounts but nothing about the band :(. they said a new album would be coming out soon last april, i'm just kind of sad and confused i guess
🌹falloutboimaniac Follow
that's really rough man yeah. i don't know what's going on with them either, but i hope they'll end up releasing something soon for you. but if you wanna listen to something that's like fig and the cig figs, maybe you'd like my clerical gnomance? they've been a total breakout hit all over the radio where i'm from lately and they are sooo good lol
🐉 burntownsgetvans
well, okay, i'll give it a shot i guess, thanks for the recommendation :)
🐉 burntownsgetvans
@fallouboimaniac Listen up chucklefuck go FUCK yourself. I'm so fucking TIRED of people like you who are always trying to replace the cig figs and discredit their success and for WHAT reason? I'm so done, I'm so fucking done, I don't wanna FUCKING HEAR IT AND YOU'VE PISSED ME THE FUCK OFF. WHY CAN'T YOU JUST MIND YOUR OWN BUSINESS AND LISTEN TO YOUR OWN SHITTY MUSIC? ARE YOU FUCKING SERIOUS? WHY CAN'T YOU JUST FUCKING Ddid anyone see that red thing just now
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🌸 greatgnomishbaker
she kalvaxus on my emperor until i red waste
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lycanstropy reblogged 123fantasydestiel
🧑 123fantasydestiel Follow
Getting really annoyed by all the posts going around joking about Kalvaxus and the Nightmare King. Both of them were EXTREMELY serious and REAL entities that caused SO much destruction in the very real world, and unless you were harmed by them you should NOT be joking about them like that, that is SO gross. My great great great great great great great great great great great great great great great great great cousin four times removed was KILLED by Kalvaxus and it is so shitty to have to open the dashboard every day to see posts like this.
🕷️ minceraftshreeper Follow
sure but kalvaxus has literally been dead for like 2 years or something 😭. like the fact that those kids killed kalvaxus very much did make national and probably international news did you somehow miss that. and the guy was a total clown be fr it'd be crazy not to joke about him
🧑 123fantasydestiel
Did you not read my entire post? I don't care if you think Kalvaxus was a "clown" or not or that he's already dead, HE KILLED THOUSANDS OF PEOPLE!!!!! You cannot be making posts JOKING About him like that!!!!!!!!!!
🐈 lycanstropy
I went on a field trip to Hell in my warlock class the other day and a bunch of pirates turned Kalvaxus into a ship and tattooed his ass
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🦆 rayofdownwiththesickness
I fucking hate public school dude a plane almost crashed into my house at midnight and turns out it's because of a fucking club at the school and then i GO to school and i can barely even get into my bard class because everyone's lining up around that fucking pirate's kid and the principal is a fucking kid because this school is such a wreck. And can anyone please tell me why the same kid is now in every single club i am also in???? every time i make eye contact with him in one of my clubs he runs away. didn't he and the pirate kid and their party kill like 6 staff members?????????? AND WHY IS THERE A COP IN THE HALLWAYS??????????????????????
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🦆 rayofdownwiththesickness reblogged rayofdownwiththesickness
🕷️ minceraftshreeper Follow
Imagine complaining about students killing people when you literally go to an adventuring school 😂
🦆 rayofdownwiththesickness
i'd rather you say it to my face than vague me on the dashboard you know
🦆 rayofdownwiththesickness
I have been hexblade cursed
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👨‍💻 12345fantasydestiel
Has Aguefort collectively forgotten about the fact that a giant spider appeared on campus a few months ago and started terrorizing people? I'm starting to understand why so many people think so negatively of Aguefort now. I was literally there and watched it happen and then no one seemed to bring it up ever again. No teachers decided to address it or anything. We're lucky it didn't kill anyone, and, actually, now I'm remembering, wasn't Kristen Applebees there? I swear to Galicaea she was there. Is that why nothing came of it, cause her party has like 4 parents on the school staff? This place is a joke.
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infaetheable reblogged alwayshappyhour
🌃 alwayshappyhour
she nightmare on my king until i cassandra
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infaetheable reblogged alwayshappyhour
🌃 alwayshappyhour
she nightmare on my king until i cassandra
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infaetheable reblogged alwayshappyhour
🌃 alwayshappyhour
she nightmare on my king until i cassandra
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infaetheable reblogged alwayshappyhour
🌃 alwayshappyhour
she nightmare on my king until i cassandra
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i cannot explain how much kristen needs to change her marketing tactic
she keeps going around and saying that cassandra is the goddess of mystery and doubt and the night, but thats not quite true. cassandra is the goddess of finding safety in the unknown. of not being afraid of doubt.
she is the belief that even if you don't know where you are or what to do, if you are lost and alone in a dark forest, there will be something on the other side, and all you have to do is get there. Cassandra is the goddess of staring into the cold, uncaring void and feeling a warm hand clasp your own, of a whisper in your ear saying youre going to be okay. you aren't alone. it is going to be scary and hard and uncertain, but you will never be on your own because i am here with you. you will never be lost because i know where you are
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If you ever feel like you don't contribute to fandom because you "only" comment—
A regular serial commenter just joined a fandom Discord server I'm on and people are coming out of the woodwork to thank her for her service to the fandom, expressing how much joy her comments on their works bring them.
Remember—they're never only comments.
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