everyone saying "art doesn't need to be perfect" hasn't taken into account the art monster, the monster that comes and kills you if art doesn't look exactly like it did in your head

Rotate them in my mind like in microwave

team GO rocket leaders

oh you're a GM? Name every NPC

fish want me women divorce me

My three girlfriends. And yes, they smoke weed.

shooting myself in the back of the head so my suicide looks suspicious and i waste everyones time

i wish superpowers were real because then you'd get people making posts like "some people need to get real hobbies and stop making identical illusionary clones of themselves that your fist passes through like smoke when you go to punch them :/" and know exactly who the OP was talking about

meet cute: it's raining and I see your battered bleeding body lying in the mud and I kick it slightly to see if you're dead

thinking about that sheet of elf drawings by ryoko kui and it's a Bunch of women looking amazing as hell and then there's like astarion really small in one corner and he looks like he was traced from the box art

listen. you're going to be surrounded by doors. more doors than you know what to do with. three actually. and there will be a man there. probably in a suit, but the kind that makes him look like a piece of meat they put into a hotdog casing every morning. they slid him into that suit like a half-domesticated animal. don't pay attention to the suit yet. because he's going to ask you something.

he's going to point to the doors and say there's a brand new car for you behind one of them. focus. i know the doors are too close for there to be a car behind them. that isn't the point. you're going to need to choose the door. which door it is doesn't matter.

because that guy? the hot dog man with the bright smile and dull eyes? he's going to open one of the other doors. and there will be nothing behind it, because that's the name of the game. and he's going to ask you whether you want to stick with your original choice or not. there's a script to this, i assure you. no, don't turn around. they don't want you looking at the script. just pay attention to my voice.

now this next part is critical. it's a numbers game, and people are named after figuring this out. famous problems and all that.

so when he's busy focusing on the doors, you're going to take his wallet.