ok @taylorswift this is your last night to bring out the ABBA holograms as special guests in Sweden

shoutout to offputting autistic people

the angel that possessed her and ruined her life and is currently walking around in the corpse of her father is her emergency contact

So High School 1000% literally sounds and is written like a pop punk song and because that’s what Taylor listened to when she was high school aged I just KNOW that was intentional and you have nooooo idea how obsessed with that I am

It reads to me as if she's upset about people being too informal with her, but that raises the mental image of a beautiful world where we call people on twitter mr or ms

kitten, stop fucking around and tell daddy where you hid his prozac or daddy's gonna add another 'hey there delilah' to the sex playlist

they need to have a threesome so bad it's not even funny

house md is wild because house tells wilson that he’ll sacrifice many things but never himself and then he sacrifices himself for wilson. and then he sacrifices himself for wilson. and then he sacrifices himself for wilson. and then he

house md - runs in the family

I thought y'all were doing the whole "two guys from an old TV show spent a lot of time in the same shot so we headcanon them as gay" thing with House MD. Like I expected to be disappointed but no, if anything the show is SIGNIFICANTLY more gay than I was led to believe. House and Wilson really are in a toxic quasi platonic quasi not relationship that hurts them both that they just cannot let go of without losing an integral part of themselves, meaning they are each the one "stable" point in each other's lives. They enable each other in incredibly fucked up ways. At first glance they seem like the stereotypical "straight laced meets bad boy" but no, one of them dates their dying patients and steals someone's spoon to run it through a cancer test to settle a bet and comes up with clever little manipulative plots to subtly torture the other one in the name of helping them and it is not House.

Also both of them just act a lot more gay than I anticipated. Like House talks a LOT about how pretty Chase is and seems to know the ins and outs of the gay scene really, really well. And Wilsons actions towards House just cannot be explained away platonically, like if that man does not desire House carnally what the actual fuck is he doing. He runs to House when he's getting divorced from his wife even though he could afford a hotel room and then House fucks with him while also trying to trick him into staying and he STILL DOESN'T LEAVE for like another couple of weeks like what kind of insane psychosexual old man yaoi is going on here.

They're both just so fucked up and such terrible people and it is so fascinating.

modern house episode: patient comes in claiming they got havana syndrome after going to miami 6 months ago. house manages to be racist against every kind of latin american except for cubans somehow and dismisses the case because he wants to spend time in his office learning a tiktok dance. cuddy forces him to take it because shes worried about the political implications of denying havana syndrome exists because the patient is a veteran. meanwhile, wilson is trying to figure out why he got banned from hinge (he was spamming). kutner gives foreman covid

gay sex

house treats a dog trainer who says she has a 100% success rate for helping angry dogs and make them quiet and nice. house argues about how it cant be exactly 100% and wont stop being annoying about it. He brings in a literally feral rabid dog and she like makes it calm and lie down . House is disturbed by this because he wanted to be right that she sucks at stuff. (B-plot: house and the team sees if house can be trained with a dog clicker.) they break into her house and they find loads of dog pheromones and learn she has been wearing it like a perfume to calm down dogs. she thinks this is fine and theres no link but they think she is having a freaky reaction to it. but they take the pheromones away and she starts dying harder. house is really mad and has dinner with wilson, where he is complaining about how this lady is a charlatan but he doesnt understand what’s going on while eating out of a bowl of kibble like nothings wrong with it. wilson is watching him intently, as is the rests of the team who is watching from afar. house says his food is really yummy and insists wilson tries some and wilson is like “NO I CANT.” and house is like no you have to. you have to eat it. and wilson is like HOUSE STOP WE’VE BEEN CLICKERING YOU TO MAKE YOU EAT DOG FOOD. and house MAKES him eat a spoonful and hes like “… cocoa puffs..?” and house smirtks smartly as he demonstrates that he knew about their silly trick. “i know you guys are watching…. come out.”(the team is slowly emerging) “don’t worry . i dont bite anymore —“ he pauses and does a house stare and walks away to the sick lady’s room. cameron pours wilson a little milk for his cereal.“20%.” he walks into the room smartly. the patient is miffed and is about to say she doesn’t want to argue about percentages literally on her death bed. but house is like “no. 20% actually refers to the number of dog bites that get infected. You got bit by a dog and never got treated for it and ingredients in the dog pheromone solution were slowing it down. (?? im not a scientist) “ and he says something stupid like “sometimes a dog’s bark really is worse than its bite” and walks out. music starts playing. chase expresses he is mad about what cameron pouring milk for wilson means for them because cameron used to pour milk for her dead husband and he thinks she isnt over him. house walks out and reaches into his pocket and sneakily eats a hand ful of kibble

House MD + text posts pt. 4/?

random house memes