Reminder that there is no such thing as a "Dangerous Dog Breed".

There is no such thing as a dog breed with puppies born with an ingrained desire to attack and harm.

There is a prey drive, but that is not going to result in a dog viciously and unprovoked attacking an innocent bystander. Also, all dogs have a prey drive, it is normal for a domesticated predator species. All cats also have a prey drive. It's completely normal and prey drive =/= aggression.

Rates of dog on human and dog on dog violence is primarily correlated to the taught behavior of the dog and slightly influenced by the dogs personality at birth, which by the way is not in any way reliably predictable by breed.

The CDC does not track attacks by breed because there simply is no reliable evidence to suggest that rates of dog attack directly correlate to the breed of the dog!

The concept of a "Dangerous Breed" as we know it today comes from the late 19th through 20th century as propaganda was created to demonize or outright ban certain dog breeds in an attempt to crack down on pit fighting, which by the way, the dogs were victims of. The mental image of the "dangerous pitbull' was conjured up specifically so that people would hate the breed, hate the people who owned it and by extend discourage the owning of the breed and lessen it's existence which would in turn lessen the number of pitbulls in fighting rings.

So basically the same shit we see today in the war on poverty (aka, war on poor people) and war on drugs (aka, war on victims of drug addiction).

This tactic unsurprisingly did not work, as the asshats who bred dogs to toss in a fighting ring never did care about the health and safety of the dog nor the opinions of those who are against pit fighting.

What it did do however was leave a bunch of non pit fighters afraid of and hateful towards pitbull breeds, which, again, I remind you, did nothing wrong and were victims.

Pitbulls, rotwilers, dobermans, staffies and bull terriers are not violent by nature.

They are, however, due to the reputation humans gave them, predispositioned to being bred, bought and adopted by people who see them as a symbol of violence and use them as a tool to attack, frighten and otherwise harm others (both human and animal) with no disregard for their dog's safety.

The dogs didn't choose to be placed in the ring. The dogs didn't choose to be abused and taught to fear humans. The dogs didn't choose to be owned by humans who reward aggression and punish submission with pain and neglect. And, thankfully, these memories and taught behaviors were not passed down to the next generation.

And even those who did go through those horrors can still be rehabilitated and want nothing more than to be loved and to love in turn.

Bonus: Even dogs who were bred for things like pit fighting were not bred to be aggressive. They were bred to be strong and powerful fighters, yes, but they were NOT bred to mindlessly attack, if they were, they'd be put down as they would be a risk to their owner and their owner's other dogs. No, they were bred to be good fighters, fiercely loyal, protective, and were then starved, beaten and provoked into fighting. They weren't simply tossed in a pit and off they went, they were injured, attacked, hit, and the only way one of them were allowed to leave the pit alive is if they killed the other. Sorry for the gruesome image, but that's simply fact, and sugar coating it does not do anyone any good. Dogs do not kill other dogs for fun. DOGS DO NOT KILL OTHER DOGS FOR FUN!

Exactly this! Astarion (and everyone else for that matter) is allowed to be a complex individual with complex feelings regarding his own sexuality. He's allowed to be unsure of his own feelings and motivations, uncomfortable yet not unattracted, and all while still being a fully consenting and understanding adult.

Astarion is allowed to enthusiastically and knowingly consent to polyamory with Halsin, and yet be insecure and unsure of his own sexual role in his relationship with Tav.

He is allowed to be ready to try having sex again, but also scared and unsure where it may lead.

He is allowed to want something, but also feel vulnerable when asking for it.

He is allowed to enjoy polyamory in one instance (with Halsin and Tav), and not enjoy it in another (with the drow twins).

He is allowed to change his mind, or to learn more about his likes dislikes, wants and fears further down the line. That does not make his former given consent nor his former feelings any less valid.

If you go into a relationship thinking you'll like the sex, and then find out you don't, that is fine and you are valid.

If you think you're ready, but then find out you're not, that's fine and you are valid.

If you later decide to try again, that's fine and you are valid.

You owe others nothing.

Surviving sexual trauma does not make us children, or broken birds, or objects.

It makes us complicated, but we are still human (so to speak)

People are allowed to be flawed and still give consent.

Hey I want to throw out a theory/headcanon out there, especially since discourse around Astarion's relationship with sex is in danger of becoming a little reductive.

So, if you dump Astarion early and tell him that that night with him was a one-time thing, he gets genuinely sad and admits that it was special and memorable.

So idk, that opens up some interesting implications and tells me that, at least starting that first night with Tav, sex isn't just transactional. At the very least, Tav is the first time he's fully consenting to sex, regardless of his motives. That alone is going to make it special. But that special-ness wouldn't be so noteworthy if he was completely sex-averse. This was a new experience and he found himself enjoying it to some degree when it happened--HOWEVER the reason for that enjoyment could be any number of things. The "transaction" may have been more pleasurable than he expected, he could have been enjoying the novelty of being free and playful with sex, Tav was someone actually attractive to him, or he could have just simply felt cared for and treated with the tenderness he never knew he needed.

Don't get me wrong, his view on sex was still warped and damaged/damaging, and based on survival. And he absolutely did need to step back from having sex and reevaluate his views, feelings, and boundaries. But I also think that his first time with Tav planted the seed of "oh shit, this is different!" and he slowly realizes that sex is not supposed to be what it's always been for him, finally culminating in his confession in Act 2. (And if you fail to fully gain his trust by Act 3, that seed never grows and you get dumped when he no longer "needs" you.)

So at least for me, I can't get behind the "he's just pretending to enjoy it" or "it's just a transaction to him"or "hes in it for blood." Like sure, *before* he sleeps with Tav he sees it that way, but he's not that great an actor, either, and the shift is obvious to me.

((Also I want to note that while I'm not super into AceAstarion, that interpretation is totally valid and imo compatible with this headcanon. Sexuality and Asexuality are complicated things, and Astarion portrays that complexity so well.))

Everyone should remember the story of the Radium Girls.

Haven't heard of it? Let me give you the short version. Early 1900s Radium has been discovered and the dangers of radioactivity was rapidly being discovered and understood as well. A handful of greedy men realize they can make radioactive paint that glows in the dark, and use it for (among other things) painting clock faces to make glow in the dark clocks. So, they start up 3 factories where radium gets ground into a powder and mixed into a paint solution called "undark". This process is done by men wearing thick lead lined aprons and gloves, not even allowed to touch the radium with their hands and instead instructed to handle it with tongs.

The paint then gets handed over to hundreds, thousands of women and girls, who are only told that they are hired to paint the clock faces on clocks and watches. These innocent, unsuspecting, uninformed women and girls as young as fifteen are instructed to paint with "undark". First, they are instructed to dip a fine tipped paint bush in water. Then, they are instructed to form the tip into a fine point with their lips, putting the still paint stained brush directly in their mouth. Then they are instructed to dip the brush in the paint, and paint a stroke. And then repeat. And repeat. And repeat. Hundreds of strokes a day. Thousands of strokes a week. Each time consuming a little bit more. And a little bit more.

Some time into production, they even take away the water, as to not "waste" any of the paint, because why not shave a few cents off production?

Some of the women worked there for mere days. Others months. Some for years.

All the while the company was fully aware of the theoretical risk posed to the women. All the while they never told them.

Eventually, when the women started getting sick and dying off one by one, the company blamed it on STIs, which I assume most of you are aware what stigma that implies.

And even when five brave women came together to sue their employer, now that they were ill and dying, the company tried to avoid responsibility by delaying the process month by month, year by year, hoping that the women would die before they could sue.

And finally, finally, when the women decided to settle out of court to see even a pittance of reimbursement before they inevitably die, the company blamed it on its (not direct quote) "Over abundance of kindness", saying it hired people who are "poor, sickly and (c-slur)" and that it's now that "kindness" coming back to bite it. This happened in the USA, less than 100 years ago.

This is why we should remember the radium girls. Not only because of how they were treated. Not only because of how they were killed for money and power. Not only because how their names were smeared even as they were suffering horrible ailments and death due to malpractice. But also because around the world similar things are happening every single day. Yes, in your country too. Everywhere there is a rich person, there is someone they're willing to destroy to stay that way and gain even more power.

The rich do not care about you. They do not care about your children. About your life, about your health. They only care about what you can give them with your blood and sweat and tears. They will put chemicals in your system which burns holes in your bones and eats away at your muscles if it saved them a penny on the dollar.

But please, continue to tell me how more money for Elon Musk means a better future for me.

People have claimed that he will enthusiastically consent to a foursome with the twins and seem disassociated if propositioned post Cazador even if he didn't get ascended. I have not been able to test that yet so I will leave that as a possible example of a time he didn't protest but became uncomfortable post act 1.

People have also claimed that if you didn't make him bite Arja in act 2, and then ask for sex during his confession scene, while tonedeaf he does not say no. I can confirm that he does not use the word "no", however, I think anyone talking about consent should read this:

as a "no".

and your only option to actually proceed to have sex with him, is to: Accuse him of not liking you Tell him you're different. Or ignore him and tell him to just do it and he'll feel better.

I, personally, would call that pressuring.

Note, this is not meant as an attack, only as a counter point to the claim that he does not voice his discomfort in the above mentioned scenario. Also note, patches have been known to change the dialogue from time to time, EA dialogue will be different from full release dialogue for example. It's very possible that some people may have seen dialogue which is no longer canon and available in game in the newer patches. With that in mind however, my argument stands, and if I can confirm the example with the drow twins, I will update my post to reflect that.

Added bonus, here is astarion's reaction to you kissing Halsin in front of him.

Edit to update, you cannot pressure Astarion into having sex with the drow twins when he says no, that was a misinterpretation on my part and on that I stand corrected. I have not gotten post non ascended yet so I will as I said update when I can if I feel the need to.

I have come to the conclusion that there is a very very large overlap in the people who assume that Astarion is "secretly uncomfortable" with a polyam relationship with Halsin and people who a) have zero social awareness, or b) are polyphobic, or c) both. Astarion is not uncomfortable with polyamory, he is uncomfortable participating in sex. Those are two very different things. Astarion is insecure about his ability to be a 'fulfilling' partner to Tav due to his aversion to sex, and that is a perfectly natural fear almost everyone who's ever been repulsed by or reluctant to participate in sex can attest to. My fellow Ace and/or sex repulsed people you should know well how scary it can be to not feel sure that your partner is satisfied. Astarion at no point sounds sad about the proposal, with the exception when specifically asking if it's because he hasn't been putting out enough recently (Note, Astarion and Tav would not have had sex at this point for a wee while), and if Tav reassures him that he is special to them just the way he is, he is genuinely happy.

"But he doesn't enjoy having sex with the Drow twins." My dear sweet child, he explicitly says he's not ready for that yet. At no point does he pretend to be okay with it only to secretly not be. He clearly and firmly says he is not okay with it, and you only get the narration about him seeming empty if you pressure him into it. This does not happen with Halsin. I repeat. This does not happen with Halsin! Astarion never, I repeat NEVER says anything akin to "not being sure" or "I don't know", or "I'm not ready for this" in regards to Halsin's proposition, while he CLEARLY says that about the Drow twins.

Why, you may then ask, is he uncomfortable with the Drow twins but not Halsin? Well, for one, the Drow twins are sex workers. And while in this house we 100% respect love and support all sex workers, they were unfortunately likely targets during his thrall days, and they almost certainly open up some wounds he's not ready to explore yet. Secondly, with the Drow twins he is pressured to participate. Again, Astarion is uncomfortable participating in sex, not with polyamory as a whole. Astarion would be uncomfortable being pressured into basic vanilla christian one on one sex with Tav just as much as he would be uncomfortable being pressured into sex with the Drow twins. That has nothing to do with polyamory. He would not be and is not uncomfortable with Tav having sex with, kissing or flirting with Halsin, as long as he is at no point forced to or pressured to physically participate himself.

Consider why every other character who is against a relationship with Halsin explicitly says so (for those of you who compare Astarion to Karlach, Karlach does explicitly say she is against it.) Consider how every single time Astarion is against something, with the exception of some events in Act 1, he explicitly says so. Consider how Astarion literally does bring up something that concerns him in that very conversation, and clearly states his concerns regarding his own sexual availability, but at no point even hints at being uncomfortable with Tav's romantic/sexual interests. And perhaps consider why you are so intent on having characters be "secretly against polyamory".

Because I will die on the hill that Astarion is a sex repulsed polyam sexual (possibly mono-romantic) pan gremlin of a man.

Reminder: Bathroom Bills don't "protect women"

The only thing they do is give horrible people a reason to judge, harass and even attack anyone they suspect of being trans. Is your mother a bit "too tall"? Is your sister's voice slightly "too deep"? Is your girlfriend's chest a bit "too flat", or your cousin's face a bit "too sharp", your niece's hair a bit "too short"? Well then, they might be a man in disguise, so I a very reasonable human who wants to "protect women" have every right to scream at them for using the women's restroom, to follow them, to demand they show me "proof" of their sex.

Anyone who doesn't fit the stereotype of what is a "woman" or a "man" can be and does get attacked in places where transphobia is fostered this way, in states like Arkansas.

Because humans don't come in 2 shapes and any, ANY rule you make saying that it's okay to single out, harass and attack trans people will also affect a very large section of cis people, male and female, not to mention the obvious harm it does to trans people.

You are hurting your daughters, your mothers, your sisters, your partners, your sons, your nephews. You are hurting your friends and your family, and it's only a matter of time before you hurt yourself too.

@antidisneyinc @positively--speculative @dirhwangdaseul

Keres hit Astarion for 4 Bludgeoning Damage.

Polyam people are allowed to exist. We are allowed to be complex. We are allowed to have insecurities, we are allowed to have boundaries, we are allowed to not personally want to participate in the activity if the activity makes us uncomfortable to personally participate in. We are allowed to choose whether we date multiple people, have sex with multiple people, or live a fully monog lifestyle. We are allowed to control our own damn lives and have a right to our own feelings.

And we are allowed to do all these things without our partners making assumptions about our boundaries, babying us by insisting we don't really want it, or putting words in our mouths. We have a right to fucking agency

I have come to the conclusion that there is a very very large overlap in the people who assume that Astarion is "secretly uncomfortable" with a polyam relationship with Halsin and people who a) have zero social awareness, or b) are polyphobic, or c) both. Astarion is not uncomfortable with polyamory, he is uncomfortable participating in sex. Those are two very different things. Astarion is insecure about his ability to be a 'fulfilling' partner to Tav due to his aversion to sex, and that is a perfectly natural fear almost everyone who's ever been repulsed by or reluctant to participate in sex can attest to. My fellow Ace and/or sex repulsed people you should know well how scary it can be to not feel sure that your partner is satisfied. Astarion at no point sounds sad about the proposal, with the exception when specifically asking if it's because he hasn't been putting out enough recently (Note, Astarion and Tav would not have had sex at this point for a wee while), and if Tav reassures him that he is special to them just the way he is, he is genuinely happy.

"But he doesn't enjoy having sex with the Drow twins." My dear sweet child, he explicitly says he's not ready for that yet. At no point does he pretend to be okay with it only to secretly not be. He clearly and firmly says he is not okay with it, and you only get the narration about him seeming empty if you pressure him into it. This does not happen with Halsin. I repeat. This does not happen with Halsin! Astarion never, I repeat NEVER says anything akin to "not being sure" or "I don't know", or "I'm not ready for this" in regards to Halsin's proposition, while he CLEARLY says that about the Drow twins.

Why, you may then ask, is he uncomfortable with the Drow twins but not Halsin? Well, for one, the Drow twins are sex workers. And while in this house we 100% respect love and support all sex workers, they were unfortunately likely targets during his thrall days, and they almost certainly open up some wounds he's not ready to explore yet. Secondly, with the Drow twins he is pressured to participate. Again, Astarion is uncomfortable participating in sex, not with polyamory as a whole. Astarion would be uncomfortable being pressured into basic vanilla christian one on one sex with Tav just as much as he would be uncomfortable being pressured into sex with the Drow twins. That has nothing to do with polyamory. He would not be and is not uncomfortable with Tav having sex with, kissing or flirting with Halsin, as long as he is at no point forced to or pressured to physically participate himself.

Consider why every other character who is against a relationship with Halsin explicitly says so (for those of you who compare Astarion to Karlach, Karlach does explicitly say she is against it.) Consider how every single time Astarion is against something, with the exception of some events in Act 1, he explicitly says so. Consider how Astarion literally does bring up something that concerns him in that very conversation, and clearly states his concerns regarding his own sexual availability, but at no point even hints at being uncomfortable with Tav's romantic/sexual interests. And perhaps consider why you are so intent on having characters be "secretly against polyamory".

Because I will die on the hill that Astarion is a sex repulsed polyam sexual (possibly mono-romantic) pan gremlin of a man.

I have come to the conclusion that there is a very very large overlap in the people who assume that Astarion is "secretly uncomfortable" with a polyam relationship with Halsin and people who a) have zero social awareness, or b) are polyphobic, or c) both. Astarion is not uncomfortable with polyamory, he is uncomfortable participating in sex. Those are two very different things. Astarion is insecure about his ability to be a 'fulfilling' partner to Tav due to his aversion to sex, and that is a perfectly natural fear almost everyone who's ever been repulsed by or reluctant to participate in sex can attest to. My fellow Ace and/or sex repulsed people you should know well how scary it can be to not feel sure that your partner is satisfied. Astarion at no point sounds sad about the proposal, with the exception when specifically asking if it's because he hasn't been putting out enough recently (Note, Astarion and Tav would not have had sex at this point for a wee while), and if Tav reassures him that he is special to them just the way he is, he is genuinely happy.

"But he doesn't enjoy having sex with the Drow twins." My dear sweet child, he explicitly says he's not ready for that yet. At no point does he pretend to be okay with it only to secretly not be. He clearly and firmly says he is not okay with it, and you only get the narration about him seeming empty if you pressure him into it. This does not happen with Halsin. I repeat. This does not happen with Halsin! Astarion never, I repeat NEVER says anything akin to "not being sure" or "I don't know", or "I'm not ready for this" in regards to Halsin's proposition, while he CLEARLY says that about the Drow twins.

Why, you may then ask, is he uncomfortable with the Drow twins but not Halsin? Well, for one, the Drow twins are sex workers. And while in this house we 100% respect love and support all sex workers, they were unfortunately likely targets during his thrall days, and they almost certainly open up some wounds he's not ready to explore yet. Secondly, with the Drow twins he is pressured to participate. Again, Astarion is uncomfortable participating in sex, not with polyamory as a whole. Astarion would be uncomfortable being pressured into basic vanilla christian one on one sex with Tav just as much as he would be uncomfortable being pressured into sex with the Drow twins. That has nothing to do with polyamory. He would not be and is not uncomfortable with Tav having sex with, kissing or flirting with Halsin, as long as he is at no point forced to or pressured to physically participate himself.

Consider why every other character who is against a relationship with Halsin explicitly says so (for those of you who compare Astarion to Karlach, Karlach does explicitly say she is against it.) Consider how every single time Astarion is against something, with the exception of some events in Act 1, he explicitly says so. Consider how Astarion literally does bring up something that concerns him in that very conversation, and clearly states his concerns regarding his own sexual availability, but at no point even hints at being uncomfortable with Tav's romantic/sexual interests. And perhaps consider why you are so intent on having characters be "secretly against polyamory".

Because I will die on the hill that Astarion is a sex repulsed polyam sexual (possibly mono-romantic) pan gremlin of a man. edit to clarify: This post is about people who are insistent on that assumption, as in, refuse to accept that they may be mistaken, or that their assumption is exactly that, an assumption with no direct proof to support it. I don't mind people who headcanon, you live your life I'll live mine, I mind people who assume he's secretly against it, and then state that as fact and canon when it simply isn't, it's a headcanon, an assumption, a plot you would like to believe, NOT something established by direct canon evidence. If you prefer to read him as uncomfortable, that's fine and none of my business. If you prefer to read him as secretly strictly monogamous and either too insecure to speak up or doesn't realize it himself, that's fine and none of my business. Hell, if you draw fanart about it and write a whole ass 100 million word fanfic creating a whole new alternate universe which becomes more popular than the game itself, it's still fine and none of my business. But the second you speak your opinion and assert that it's fact, I have just as much a right to speak my opinion and tell you you're wrong.

Another factor that people just seem to happily forget. Vegan food options are horribly expensive. I've tried looking for budget vegan options and I honestly can't find any. I have seen so many people say "Oh it's not that bad, it's only about $40 more to buy the vegan groceries than the non vegan groceries" and to that my response is, do you know what the definition of "budget" is? It means limited funds, a certain fixed amount you have for spending and you can't go over that amount.

I can't afford to drop an extra $40 a week on food. Most of my friends can't afford to drop an extra $40 a week on food. "Just spend $40 more" is by definition not a budget option.

If I on my budget am faced with buying a 6pack of meat pies for $7 which will last me 3 meals, or a itty bitty bag of 4 vegan patties (not including the buns) which will last me 2 meals for $14, you know which one I'm gonna pick.

I love leather and I love fur and I don’t mind arguing about it.

It's that time of the year where police departments start warning everyone about "drugs disguised as candy" for Halloween!

And while everyone's reaction is usually "haha they're so stupid lol!!" Let's not forget that this is one of the ways they transparently demonize addicts in order to keep the populace convinced that they are evil, horrible people that deserve to be locked up. They know that citizens will eventually start thinking "hey, they're really only hurting themselves, shouldn't they get help instead of being punished?" so in order to keep everyone comfortable with criminalizing drug addiction, they spread the idea that addicts have a secret agenda to turn EVERYONE into addicts, so they just *NEED* to keep them locked up.

"They're coming after our children! They're trying to turn our children into _____!" (Does that sound familiar?)

We need to go harder at humiliating these fuckers every year they keep trying to spread this bullshit.

I think the main issue with children's spaces online (and this isn't an argument against having these spaces, it's just an issue that is currently a problem and we really need to get it worked out) is that predators love using those spaces to interact with prospective victims.

It's a constant balance, right? You want the parents to be able to trust a website to let their kids on it and not be monitored 24/7 because as much as we say it's the parents' responsibility (and it really is) it's not feasible for a human being to spend 100% of their time taking care of another human being. Parents will eventually leave their child unattended online and when that happens they want their child to be safe. But if a parent trusts a website too much (eg. Club Penguin) then you have the risk of the child being left unmonitored in an environment where adults can pose as children/friends and use that trust to prey on children.

You cannot realistically have any website where users can interact with each other marketed to kids which will not be used by predators for malicious reasons. As a result, all forms of content websites (Youtube, Tiktok, Wattpad, Twitch but for kids) and social media (tumblr, twitter etc but for kid) is by default a danger zone.

It's really hard to strike a balance in making a platform which is truly unique to the online experience targeted to kids (not just a computer game but played on the internet, eg flash games) which is very fundamentally an interactive experience, and also have it be a fully or reasonably safe and threat free space. It's like letting your kid play in a park but 10% of the five year-olds at the park are actually adults shapeshifted to look like 5yos. It's a damn mess.

i’m just. very frustrated as an adult on a 17+ app being treated like i’m a little baby who can’t handle adult content or curate my own experience. it’s fucking stupid

I read Gale as what I call an optimistic masker. What I mean by this is, he puts on a happy, charming, self confident mask to the world around him while just below the surface he's a self doubting (possibly self hating) insecure and scared mess of a man.

I say this because I'm the same. For reference I am autistic so masking comes naturally to me but autism/nd is not needed to mask or be an optimistic masker. I suffer from severe chronic depression, self hate and anxiety, but if you were to talk to me casually you'd never know unless you're very insightful or I tell you directly. I come across as cheerful, bubbly, talkative and even flirty, but I am no less a mess on the inside.

the most heartbreaking thing about gale's romance is how he keeps trying to offer tav a "better" version of himself. like sure, you love him, but don't you want a better him? he can woo you, but don't want him to wow you? he is at your side as a great wizard, but don't want him to be at your side with the power of a god? are you sure you want to renounce to all of that? are you sure?

and if tav says yes, he is wanted already as he is, he is already all he needs to be...he just says I hope you are right. I don't wanna lose you