List 5 things that make you happy. I am getting to know my mutuals and followers (ू•‧̫•ू⑅)♡

Fuck...

Happy? The fuck is that? 🤣

My cats (rare).

A really good movie experience in the cinema. Not, like, MCU. It has to put a smile on my face. Like, Joker dancing on the stairs kinda stuff. Good books, too. "The Blacktongue Thief" for example.

A good song played really loud. Subwoofers-level loud. Sunlight from Hozier, for example. I still haven't listened to Unreal Unearth, because I'm just saving that happiness for some time when I really need it. Hope it's good. Fingers crossed.

Stand-up comedy. The ones with long stories especially. The darker the better. If you did time in prison or did crack, I'm watching your Netflix special.

Writing. There's a certain joy when I finish writing something. I hate editing, but writing? Having an idea and getting it down in a way that's coherent enough to entertain someone else? I might never create a fun world that people want to escape into, but I kinda take some pride(?)/joy in giving someone something that's engaging enough to make them distracted from whatever's going on irl for a bit. Like a "do for others what was done for me" kinda thing.

Now, this might not look very happy, but I'm one of those anhedonic people, so until I can find someone willing to give me ketamine, this is the best I can do.

Why did I think that Hayden Christensen was very old and that they were using de-aging VFX to make him young again and give him back limbs???

HAYDEN CHRISTENSEN as ANAKIN SKYWALKER — Ahsoka: Shadow Warrior (Behind The Scenes)

I swear this fandom is becoming more and more insufferable every day which is scary not to mention it's at least one more year of wait until season 2. I don't want even to imagine what it's going to be like when it actually airs. I've been in other fandoms, including the GoT one, but this level of toxicity, aggression, tribalism and hypocrisy is unreachable. What is with this show that encourages such behaviour? I really don't understand. I used to be team green (I still am kind of) during the show, especially the second half and after the show ended because I hated the way many black stans were acting towards anyone who didn't share their opinions and the way they talked about green characters (and even the actors) in general. Also, the framing of the show with it's good vs bad guys concept was annoying af so it wasn't hard to choose TG, at least to me. However, now I'm not even sure I care enough. It's so difficult to discuss anything show related normally and nust because all this toxicity soured the whole hotd experience to me now I'm more than anything team anti hotd fandom. That's why your fic is literally the last hotd related thing I'm looking forward to so atm so thank you for actually giving something good to this wretched fandom 😩. Seriously, Aemond and Rhaena should follow my example and just be done with everyone and everything lol. Anyway, I'm (not so😁) patiently waiting for the next update. I don't know anymore if I'll watch season 2, but I'll definitely read swhhw.

I get you. At large, it's not a fun fandom to be in. I remember when there was a petition to stop Matt Smith from being Dr Who on the grounds of him being too ugly, so in a sense it's a little amusing to see how he's inspired this whole "Choke me daddy" rabid fanbase... But other than that, it's really not much fun. People take everything as fighting words. They're attacking real people to defend fictional characters written by a man who hasn't even finished his series as yet after a decade long hiatus...

I don't even get the joy of reading other fics really, because I try to reduce the odds on me 'stealing' someone else's fic idea. Like, I know fair is fair and it's all fanworks, but I'll literally read something, go to sleep, incept myself, and wake up like "you know what would be really cool???" and it's only when I'm reading it all over that I'll realize that I've split off on a whole different unrelated tangent and have to course correct. I'm trying to write better and faster and cut down on how distracted I get. For example, writing while commuting feels productive but it really isn't, not how I do it. I get so distracted... I'll be editing and realize, "No, you can't write that. That's a line from a Hozier song."

HotD doesn't deserve the time or the energy. Like, I look at the word count of swhhw and question all my life decisions. But the rhaemond fandom is so nice and so small, you can't help it. It's like an oasis in a radioactive wasteland.

I'm also kinda doing it for Team Dyslexia and Team Dysgraphia in a sort of "We can do it!" way?

I really want to finish this before S2 starts.

Now I'm wishing I wrote in some casual Casterly Rock passerby walking past as Aemond is gravedigging. 🤣🤣🤣 Regrets. Regrets.

And the dress!

I'm imagining you actively trying to recruit readers! We don't know if I'm going to stick the landing on this and I still have to try my hand at Aegon so probably hold off on vouching for me 😅. Swhhw already has more readers I think than anything I've ever written in my life...

And it might turn out to be the longest...

@daylander1000’s new chapters of See, What Happened Was… made me kick my legs and squeal and laugh. I won’t stop trying to get people to read it. Also I wanted to draw this but it never came out the way I wanted it but this is what I thought of this during that one scene:

just read chapter 19 of see, what had happened was… by @daylander1000 and i rushed to draw that last scene because i physically could not think about anything else. i love these two so bad

Let the record show I started watching Predators on Netflix before I knew Tom Hardy was narrating it.

" Aemond cunt-eye from cunt landings" is so cringe( not your writing- I love your writing- but the line) and it's so cringe because it's something Daemon would actually say. Like when he called Criston 'Crispin.

Lolol, 🤣, I'm trying!

I can't fix Daemon. Ideally, I'd be able to come up with some kind of way to flesh him out, and balance the story a little with some characters from the other side, but I just can't come up with any kind of role for him in the story other than "edgy asshole grown man bad boy."

He called Otto a cunt, he called Aegon a cunt... why should Aemond be spared the honor? 😅

And imagining Alicent just being surrounded by people being cunt this and cunt that made me laugh.

Out of curiosity, who is/are your favourite and least favourite character(s) in HotD and GoT?

Favorite: Either Vhagar or Otto.

Vhagar is the oldest, last of her kind... She won me over at the end with her "Fuck them Baby Dragons" attitude. She did what she did.

I know Otto is hated, but he's the only character I feel makes consistent sense. I understand his motivations.

As much as I like dragons, I like the dragonless people who fight dragons even more. Man got exiled from the frying pan and came back voluntarily to the same exact even hotter frying pan ten years later with a new badge. 🤣

I wish they'd developed the idea of dragon hunters more.

Hell, I wish they'd developed the dragons more. These super powerful creatures who obey their jackass masters and lead themselves to extinction against all instinct of self preservation.

In third place is probably Aegon. Not the character really but the portrayal. The actor has a bunch of facial expressions that just add so much "Only Sane Man" energy. I watched all of Hannibal just for Mads Mikkelson's microexpressions. I love when actors give bad guys all these little quirks that make you look at them for their reactions to things. Cumberbatch and Elba...

I don't really have a favorite character from GoT. I read those books but didn't love the adaptation. Probably Oberyn? I remember hoping that the show changed up his death. He was the last character I cared about...

Least favorite is Corlys. (See previous rants for details)

I am so tired.

I love how your Aemond behaves exactly the way a child raised by Criston and Alicent would

Thank you!

That's what I'm going for. Alicent's sense of duty and propriety combined with Criston's habit of killing people in the most dramatic ways. 🤣

I really appreciate how you aren’t afraid to highlight just how nonsensical the Velaryon’s are being-except Vaemond 😍of course. Aemond and Daeron are both racking their brains trying to think what Rhaenyra could possibly have promised Corlys to back her blatantly false claims and still not quite believing that he is. And Rhaena is just dying of second hand embarrassment because she DIDN’T PROMISE HIM ANYTHING

When he got out of his coma to go bend the knee to the people who just murdered his brother, I started wondering if he was auditioning to join Rhaenyra's circle as husband number 3. Like, "forget grandkids, I want the throne for myself," but no.

I've tried reading some Corlys fics to see what motivations other people come up with and honestly, the most entertaining one was a modern omegaverse mpreg fic where he and Luke are bonded and he stops caring about Rhaenys and his family. Luke's sort of like "fuck y'all, he's my man now" and inherits the company. I don't remember the name, but it exists. That's a real fic. Either on here or ao3.

I did the research and Rhaena just being like "..." was the best I could do.

I tried. I honestly tried.

Awww Rhaena introducing her dragon Morning to Aemond, her betrothed, and having such a beautiful bonding momen-

MORNING, NO!!! WHAT ARE YOU DOING

I'm currently rereading swhhw and I must say that the scene where Jace was peeling the apple while Rhaena was trying to talk to him about Aemond and her intention to apologise makes me want to smack the shit out of him lmao. "He called us bastards". So what, that's the truth, isn't it? Idk, the Strong boys get too much (undeserved) love from the fandom imho, which is really annoying. They are far from being innocent little angels and I still don't understand how anyone can genuinely believe that they were blameless during the Driftmark/eye incident or how can anyone fail to see that there is something seriously problematic in Luke's snickering at the dinner (in the face of the person he mutilated no less) and Jace's "their opinions don't matter". Not to mention that they are prone to violent outbursts and, despite being aware of their bastardy, they have no problem in taking something that doesn't belong to them, even after witnessing something horrible and unjust like Vaemond's murder. However, while reading your fic I got an impression (feel free to correct me if I'm wrong, ofc) that you feel similar about them, so it's nice to know that there are people who understand what I'm talking about. Most of the fans I've tried to discuss this with were like "but they are nice, sweet, cute, poor baby Luke"... And that's the opinion of the big part of the fandom, unfortunately. As I said, the Strongs definitely don't deserve all the love they get, at least not based on what we have seen so far.

Thanks for reading my rant. I'm looking forward to your Casterly Rock chapters :)

Sorry for the delay.

I'm with you.

I don't get how they're all sweet and innocent and harmless babies when the writers went out of their way to introduce them as bullies.

There are lots of ways to introduce a character. Case in point. Adult! Aegon got stuck with the rapist tag from the get-go. They introduced him via Dyana in tears. Daemon gets introduced in Jaime Lannister fashion, sitting on the throne, to help the audience get that this is supposed to be their new too-cool-for-rules badass fan favorite. Rhaenyra is introduced on dragonback as the brave bold heir apparent/heroine/narrator we're supposed to side with. Alicent is the timid "handmaiden" friend who stays at the door because she's the outsider... Corlys and Otto get introduced at the small council while counseling. And Luke and Jace are introduced in the Crab and Goyle fashion, and even after a time skip, they don't change.

You can't really discuss things with people in this fandom. People in this fandom think Daemon is a "malewife" when he's canonically a domestic abuser and wife killer.

I'm not judging people for liking villains or morally grey characters. Hell, I'm a Homelander fan. I like Villanelle. Kilgrave. Negan with a baseball bat... I just don't get why the HOTD fandom likes to go so delulu over things. idk 🤷🏾‍♀️

Thank you so much for continuing this story!!!! Your Aemond is my absolute favorite and I will accept no other version of his character. These chapters were so entertaining to read and you nailed every single aspect. All the Hightowers absolutely slayed, Aemond and Rheana’s banter was awesome and the humor was to die for. I love all the details you put into this fic from the logistics of the traveling to Loreon favorite game. It really elevates this fic from most of the other hotd fics out there and makes the reading experience reallyyyy enjoyable.

Aemond and Rheana are such pookies I wanna cuddle them both, Aemond freaking out over having cock blood in his mouth was so funny and that’s exactly why I love your Aemond he’s just so adorable and sociopathic. Rheana telling Aemond she likes how he looks is one of my favorite scenes, she is absolutely right, Criston aged fantastically and no one compares to him.

Btw I am manifesting for the blood to dye Aemond’s hair pink

Lolololol, Loreon's game took so long to come up with. Idk, I wanted to just have a normal happy child with normal happy siblings playing a normal happy game the way children do, and Rhaena reacting like "Ugh, these weirdos." But I ended up reading a ton of children's books rhymes and games...

I laughed so hard at the "cock-blood" repetition.

There's another story I had where I wrote an attempted assault, and in that, the heroine is flustered and panicking afterwards, and I really didn't want to do that again. It gave me deja vu writing it, and I took a step back like "Huh. Why am I writing this same exact scene again, only in a medieval setting? Why is this stuck in my subconscious?"

After much introspection, I left in the assault attempt, (because it's Westeros), but decided I wanted to sort of flip it(?) and have Aemond be the one who's flustered and panicky. I wanted to try to shift it to where it's the guy who feels violated and dirty and embarrassed and needs a hot bath to get clean again, while the girl sort of has to take charge and be the comforter to tell him that he's alright and help him get that hot bath set up because he needs it more than she does because she really is okay.

I read a ton of romance novels and hurt/comfort fics, and while I like the guy rescuing the girl, I don't like how it sometimes comes off like the girl is so overwhelmingly grateful that she's like "You have now earned me and unlocked my vagina. Here is the key to my panties as a reward for your kindness." I wanted it to be more mutual. Mutual comfort? Idk.

And Aemond's such a clean little meow meow in the series, (especially when compared to Aegon who's rolling around in the mud), it didn't feel too extremely ooc to write him not enjoying the bloodshed of penile amputation.😅

HotD vs GoT (season 1) ?

I've seen many comparisons between the two and according to some critics (quite a lot of them tbh) HotD is superior or has a potential to be because... reasons. Now, while I do believe that, while comparisons are always odious they sometimes make, but this one is really weird and unjust because a lot of people are still disappointed with how GoT ended (personally, I wasn't happy with how some things played out either, especially in the last two seasons, but I am definitely not that upset four years later and actually remember the show as a whole more or less fondly) and this disappointment together with anti D&D discourse probably clouds the judgement. However, they seem to ignore that GoT had 8 seasons and was mostly well liked and praised until the last two, while HOTD has barely begun and already has many problems writing-wise imho. Will those same people, after HOTD ends (and there is no way that everyone will be satisfied with the ending) retrospectively start to hate everything they are praising right now, I wonder? I do sincerely hope that HotD will improve and that every new season will be better then the previous one, but based strictly on the first seasons (I recently rewatched GoT s1) it's GoT >> HotD.

What do you think?

I didn't like GOT. I didn't watch it properly. I tuned in to see how they did some of the bigger moments like Red Wedding and Purple Wedding, and I watched the last two seasons just for asoiaf closure, and honestly, I liked the GOT ending, more or less.

Not Dany being killed by Jon, or Arya vs Night King, or King Bran, but Dany burning the whole place down. Her arc's sort of going there in the books imo. I'm a simple woman—I'm in this for the dragons and for Drogon burning things. I wanted to see Stoneheart and Young Griff and those storylines, but I will take Drogon burning things.

I truly don't get the pretense that HOTD is better than GOT or that Codal & co are in any way better than D&D. I'm giving them less points actually because they saw how GOT unraveled and they've made zero improvements. D&D at least have an excuse—Martin promised to have the books finished when they started. They signed on to adapt, not finish asoiaf on their own strengths. It's a complicated thing that even the creator is struggling with after a decade. They tried, at least.

Codal and co are already floundering in S1. They've already lost narrative coherence. Even the characters aren't coherent. And yes, you can use a time skip to just wave a "People change" flag at all the inconsistencies but come on.

In their defence tho, "And then all the hyper-intelligent special rare sentient magic dragons killed each other in the stupidest ways ever for no real reason" is not an easy story to tell without an extreme amount of hand-waving.

I don't think F&B should exist. I think Martin should have looked it over a couple of times like "Hot six-year-old? Jumping from one dragon to another? WTF is this? This ain't it. Nope."

Honestly, I think HBO just has a bunch of media people on the payroll hyping them up so they can use the emmys for free advertising. Brian Cox is up for a lead actor Emmy with a grand total of three episodes? It's not TV, just HBO living by HBO rules. If they say it's better then it's better. 🤷🏾‍♀️

“His mother who had banned him from visiting his father when she’d caught him spitting in said milk of the poppy.”

Aemond you absolute king.

I personally hate shitty fathers, and I hold that they should be literally spat on by their children and the women who have to suffer them. 😅

Like, in ancient Sparta, how you were demoted to the lowest status if you flaked out on your warrior duties? They should treat people who flake out on fatherhood the same way.

I saw you updated and I’m soooo excited! I really need to know: how is Aemond going to straighten his hair before he goes home? I don’t think either Baela or Rhaena use ye olde hair iron 🤣

Why would you make me think about this? 🥹😂

Thank you. I have a note on his hair for a post-Luke scene, but I really would have forgotten to include it now.

This way I can have a nice little "wet/curly hair means he was out committing murder crimes" running joke.😊