Weiss’s Appeal for the @buddingblossoms Contest is now here!

Why are you leaving Pokémon rp?

Sorry for the late reply; I haven’t checked this blog between posting Feiyun’s Appeal and today, but I logged back on here to see if I was messaged. I go into detail here and here--the tl;dr is that this hobby did not serve me as well as I thought, and I was also sick and tired of the constant panic attacks that I would have over the shit people would do here. Like. Some of the most egregious shit I’ve ever seen in my entire life has been on Tumblr--and a lot of it specifically from the Pokemon RPC--and this is coming from someone who saw her mom get arrested once, who attempted suicide four times and who found out that someone she went to high school with committed a hate crime against someone of her race. This environment is not healthy for me, nor is it a place where I can be my best self--given how many mistakes I’ve made in the past. So, I’ve decided to leave behind this community (at least the RP part of it) and head for greener pastures.

Feiyun’s Appeal at @buddingblossoms is here!

Everyone come appreciate this masterpiece that I wrote for @buddingblossoms 

A Fond Farewell

It is several days past August 22. I have officially and permanently left the Pokémon RPC on Tumblr. I was contemplating doing a big fancy post, but given the amount of heart and thought I have put into the posts leading up to my leaving, I feel as though I have already said an adequate goodbye and no further ceremony or reflection is necessary. The only reason I will return to post stuff on my blogs is to post entries for Pokémon Contests, but other than that, my days of RPing in Pokémon Tumblr are done, and quite possibly, so are my days of RPing on Tumblr in general as well.

I have only this to say in parting: I hereby release all of my mains from any agreements to be mains with me, should they seek another main.

I release all members of the Uniman League from any obligations they may feel to have their Uniman verses be their main verses as well. 

I also want to say I will NOT be offended if my mutuals seek alternatives or even direct replacements for any IC interactions, relationships and/or plots lost because I barely/don’t RP.

I won’t be around for hopefully forever, so it would not be fair of me to impose main/exclusive restrictions on people any longer--or keep an exclusive copyright on the ideas that we all worked together to create. It also wouldn’t be fair of me to expect people to retain any sort of mainverse connection to my verse(s) when they should be allowed to move on as I leave Tumblr behind. It especially wouldn’t be fair of me to say “well there’s a 1% chance I do return so I’m going to make everybody wait for me to really leave.” If I ever return to Tumblr RP (God forbid), I will not expect mutuals to drop the main/exclusive relationships that have replaced mine or backstories rewritten to reflect the fact that our muse relationships are no longer mainverse.

If you want to keep up with me, you can find me at my updates blog. Thank you all for continuing to be on this journey with me. I hope our friendships last as long as I’ve spent RPing, and far beyond.

Tian out!

I’M 26!!!

Feiyun’s entry for the @roastingrack roasting @fallenxspirit is here!

"But Barney doesn't need to be dark," I say, knowing full well I turned Pokémon into a straight up political and supernatural horror show

I haven’t touched any Pokémon content in forever but I came on here to say that this video? Has EXTREME Pokémon universe energy

We have the opportunity to partner up with Rubik’s Cube and customize our own cube. Do we take on this project, fellow Pride Knights? Yes or no?

Reviving my Star Wars obsession with this SW pride bag on the last day of Pride Month!

I spent 15 days working on this 64-page, 36k+ word masterpiece: my Pokémon lore translated to an entire original universe. I copy-pasted a great deal from my preexisting Pokémon bios, but I also wrote thousands of words’ worth of brand new content. For any section before “The Birth of Unima,” just replace “Magia” with “Pokémon” and change a few of the names and you basically have what I envisioned for my Pokémon lore. Enjoy!

Gonna make a separate blog to put all my updates and vents

On a much lighter note

Copyright lawyers @ my original universe be like

Change is painful. Change is hard.

Quite obviously, I’m still going to go through with quitting Tumblr. My mind is made up on that one, and as for RP, if I do still do it, I won’t have much more than a few threads going at a time and will likely not do Pokémon Contests. But I’m still filled with a sense of melancholy at the thought that this thing that was central to my life for the past seven years might one day not be a part of it at all.

I know it’s for the best. Recently I have come to the realization that the Pokémon fandom is an increasingly hostile place--to the point that I’ve started to actively warn potential newcomers against joining. How do I know? I have had at least one all-night/multi-day panic attack per year since 2020. This year I had two all-night panic attacks JUST in March, literally back-to-back. This didn’t used to fucking happen, and it’s taken me this long to realize that no amount of passion for a fandom is worth the HORRIFIC treatment I have received. I left the Star Wars fandom due to all the drama that happened in it, and I have not looked back since. But that was an easier decision for me because I didn’t even spend a full year in SW. Now I have realized it’s time to do the same for the Pokémon fandom, but since I was much more attached to Pokémon than I was to Star Wars RP, I’m going through the bargaining stage of grief: what if I met only a few new people in the fandom every once in a while? What if I just really limited my threads? What if I came back many years later, after I’ve grown a thicker skin? Which are all valid options in the end, but at the same time I feel like they may also serve as excuses to drag me back to a place that’s been just awful for me.

The part that’s been hardest to let go of is Pokémon Contests. I still plan on going to at least one this year and maybe one next year, but to think those could be my last events ever really saddens me. Once again, I know this may be for the best. If neglecting my book for a month because I spent all my free time on Appeals for contests that haven’t even been announced yet is any indication, I’m reaching a point in my life where my free time is at a crossroads between being spent on fan work and original work, and I can only choose one. As I said before, I was about to spend the next three months working on nothing but Appeals and not working on my book. But going forward, even in situations where there’s not going to be so many Contests within the span of 3 months…Would it be wise to spend even two weeks on Appeals instead of original work, when progress is so crucial to getting a book published and when I’d be lucky to even have two weeks of consistent writing time/energy at all? Would it be wise to spend even one week? It’s sobering to feel that I, who have literally never turned down (or dropped out of) an event I wasn’t banned from in my entire time in the Pokémon RPC, may have to exert some EXTREME self control and actively turn down every event no matter how fun it looks. It’s a much different path than the one I was on just a few weeks ago--just a few days ago, even. It’s one I know will be the best for my creativity. But still, leaving things behind feels like a loss. And a loss hurts, even though I know this loss will ultimately be a gain.

I know I only come on here to update with shitty stuff happening in my life, so tonight I’m going to share something positive. I intern at a law firm and I’ve been taking notes for this one trial in which the opposing party was caught lying…The final day of the trial got delayed for two months, but tomorrow’s the day, and I am going to see her bitch ass get taken DOWN.

I’m so excited. I’ve waited literally since April for this. LET’S FUCKING GOOOOOOOOOO

Things my mom just told my stepdad: “Set a timer. At 3:00, [Tian] instantly gets off the computer or else we don’t take the cat to see the vet.”