clutteredghost
your neighborhood ghost
my friends worry because i call myself a ghost but honestly it's pretty accurate (they/them please !!)
592 posts
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Manu Baumgartner's fan page
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The only way I’m getting through life right now is pretending my new fp is vauging @ me like I’m vauging at her
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Me @ my new fp:
Yes I know I’m being obsessive
Yes I know it’s creepy
Yes I know it’s not gonna last
I know I know I know
But you seem so perfect and I just want to love you and be loved by you
I’m so sorry
#i just want attention#i know it’s wrong but i don’t know how to stop#actuallybpd#bpd#bpd tag#i don't know what's happening
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me: is a needy piece of shit who needs constant reassurance and attention from friends
also me: is distant as hell, avoids all social interaction
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me? both avoiding and craving attention? you bet
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any other maladaptive daydreamers ever have like a sleep dream that’s so good that u spend the rest of the day daydreaming about ur own dream
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“How do you tell people? How do you tell them that you’re exhausted even though you slept for 10 hours? How do you tell them that you need a break from talking and smiling and simply being near them? How do you tell them that although you love them, you so desperately need to be alone tonight?”
— Midnight thoughts (I’m burnt out)
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me being with friends: omg i’m so loved!!! i love my friends,they’re always here for me and i’ll always be there for them too, we’re having so much fun omg so many things we should do!!!
me once i’m alone: …
me: anyways everyone hates me and i’m Ready to Die
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i love how when anything at all goes wrong i go straight to uncontrollable rage and/or wanting to fucking die
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why is it that in therapy i totally blank out on what i wanted to talk about
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Conversation
Them: omg you're so skinny now how did you lose so much weight??? :)
Me: I got depressed and stopped eating :)
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don’t you just love how mental disorders are basically buy one get seven free
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why can’t i tell people i wanna kill myself without them freaking out or tryna send me somewhere like i’m ok i’m just depressed listen to me vent and let me get this off my chest
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top 3 depression activities:
-watching vine compilations in your bed at 3am
-playing 2048 with a dead expression
-listening to Africa by Toto on repeat and trying to feel something, anything
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will i ever stop feeling like the Most Annoying Nuisance To Ever Walk The Planet™? magic 8 ball says probably not
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my Bad Moods either last 20 minutes or 2 weeks there’s no in between
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hell brain: cut off all ur hair!!
me: what?? no !!
hell brain: snip snip
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