Caption this.

it’s my fic! 

ok i finished this series finally, damn. 

I’m nervous about this last part though. 

Southside

read it on the AO3 at https://ift.tt/33smEJp

by proval

But Mickey’s going to make the bastard suffer. Since he’s back Southside, might as well act like it. What’s one or two more parole violations in the grand scheme of things, anyway?

Mickey POV gap filler for 10x11 and 10x12.

Words: 11731, Chapters: 1/1, Language: English

Series: Part 4 of Southside Forever

Fandoms: Shameless (US)

Rating: Explicit

Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply

Categories: M/M

Characters: Ian Gallagher, Mickey Milkovich, Sandy Milkovich, Terry Milkovich, Debbie Gallagher, Lip Gallagher, Liam Gallagher (Shameless US), Colin Milkovich, Jamie Milkovich

Relationships: Ian Gallagher/Mickey Milkovich

Additional Tags: Past Abuse, Past Child Abuse, PTSD-like symptoms, Illegal Activities, Canon-Typical Violence, Gap Filler, Season/Series 10, s10e11, s10e12, Wedding Planning, Wedding, Homicidal Thoughts, Homophobia, Light Dom/sub, Light Bondage, Canon Compliant

read it on the AO3 at https://ift.tt/33smEJp

Former classmate reposted pictures of Chadwick Boseman. She left heartfelt message . Rest In Peace

petition to stop calling white tank tops “wife beaters”

i am so blown away it’s not even funny.

@artofobsession did this BEAUTIFUL drawing of trans mickey for me, and i have been staring at it in awe for the past 24 hours. this little idea was something very special to me, and i could not be happier with how it came to fruition. (click for HQ!)

thank you so much for bringing this to life, hannah! 

[Jackie Chan Movies] Thunderbolt / 霹靂火 (1995)

2x02 // 10x12

I agree with this but just got me thinking about Ian’s relationship to cheating overall.

I think Ian’s kind of normalised to a more casual monogamish vibe (and outright cheating too) in the Gallagher family/wider environment. Ian’s grown up with the Frank/Monica on/off again relationship which often includes other partners (he’s a product of Monica/Clayton). That’s going to have an enormous influence on him even if he doesn’t condone or respect his parents’ relationship. Fiona and Lip are similarly not super tied to the idea of sexual faithfulness in relationships above all else (see Lip and Karen for eg).

Just as Ian’s general issues w sex feed into his hypersexuality when manic so does his relationship to sexual fidelity, and this context is relevant to whether or not Ian sees himself as cheating/betraying Mickey. Early on, he sleeps w Mickey when he’s “with” Kash (tells Lip ‘I’m doing both’...), though Kash definitely sees this as a betrayal. Ian tells Ned he ‘kinda has a boyfriend’ (is seeing both him and Mickey at the same time) and Ned doesn’t really mind--although Mickey does which is kind of partially the point. Ian consistently dates people who are in other serious relationships and/or engage in other “casual” sex, eg. Kash, Ned, Mickey. Mickey finds him having sex with someone else in s3 and they immediately get together after. Ian’s pissed off by Mickey and Angie but doesn’t hold it against him in any way. He’s furious and wounded by Mickey and Svetlana of course but that’s an incredibly complicated/difficult situation. So there’s both an expectation of some kind of sexual fidelity in these relationships and also often a pretty casual response when there’s not (even if w Mickey the casualness is an attempt to downplay a lot of emotions).

I think this more casual approach to sexual monogamy comes up again w his reaction to Byron in s10 where he’s most upset/just plain baffled when Mickey says he’s ‘in love’ rather than any of the gross sex stuff Mickey throws at him. (Although yeah counterpoint, he’s really not into the idea that Mickey sleep with other people in prison). I feel like Ian’s perspective is pretty normal considering his environment. The problem is exactly where he’s at regarding what he expects in re ‘fidelity’ w/i romantic sexual relationship often goes unspoken as though it’s obvious (as it often does for most people in the show and in life--with the default norm being different people’s versions of monogamy).

I agree with the above in that I think there’s an implicit agreement at the end of s4 that Ian and Mickey are a couple and therefore they don’t bang other people. But I don’t think we see an explicit agreement on the show? I mean we get “just wondering if we’re a couple or not...” and we get the coming out scene w its very high level display of emotional commitment--but there’s no explicit “we’re not going to have sex with anyone else” conversation. I don’t know if it’s entirely clear between them in s5 what they expect of each other in regards to monogamy. We meet them living in a non-traditional family w Svetlana and Yevgeny. I love that line Ian has about “you got a problem with your boyfriend washing the layer of scum from the tub that your wife washes your child in?” Mickey’s definitely not sleeping w Svetlana but I still think this dynamic is relevant especially considering it seems like Ian is the one pushing for the arrangement and/or trying to make it work (learning Russian, getting on with Svetlana, looking after Yev). I think that’s one thing Shameless does that is pretty cool--is that it gives us these really nontraditional approaches to family life. And yeah, not forgetting this dynamic is also fraught with a lot of negative stuff (blackmail, trauma...).

But I think it’s useful to see Ian’s cheating in s5 in this context. Yes, it’s obvious that Ian and Mickey are gearing up for a more exclusive relationship for a while pre-s5 seeing as they both witness each other’s anger/jealousy/disappointment when they sleep with other people / a lot of that on Ian’s side was clearly done with the intention to make Mickey jealous/step up his level of commitment. And yeah, Mickey definitely regards what Ian does as cheating in s5 as we see when he beats up the guy in the club. But Ian and Mickey both have a history of more casual/less clear clear cut attitudes when it comes to relationships and fidelity.

I don’t have any experience with bipolar so I’m really out of depth when we bring in the question of mania and hypersexuality--so yeah, feel free to discount this next idea. I’ve heard people with bipolar talking about how normal manic episodes can feel when you’re going through them -- how difficult it is to notice that what you’re doing and feeling isn’t normal. I wonder if Ian’s sexual actions in s5 and his perception of them come from a combination of long term normalisation around that kind of behaviour in relationships (and as a lot of people have noted really well, a long term view of his worth being tied up with sex), and the mania itself and the way it (again, no personal experience) might feel good, normal, right. Ian’s fantasy of the perfect life with Mickey and Yev (the dream) might not, to Ian’s view, feel completely out of sync with his sexual acts w other guys, especially when his view of himself as the provider (making money for the family) and the sex stuff intersect with the porno.

The scene when Mickey confronts Ian about the porno is one of the best in my opinion. It is so full of disconnect and at the same time love between Ian and Mickey. One of the things that always strikes me is how casually Ian brings up where and how he got the money like it’s a totally normal thing to do. And how he completely expects Mickey to agree/not have a problem with it in that moment. There’s so much loaded into ‘fuck’s up with you’ and ‘I didn’t realise how important this was to you’, eg maybe Ian’s come to earth suddenly about how much his own behaviour over the season would affect Mickey. And also learns/it is confirmed to him how important sexual monogamy is to Mickey.

I totally agree that there’s some clear indications of guilt from Ian (eg the mirror, his face after the store guy, the fact he hides it from Mickey like he knows it would hurt hum) and maybe the sense of normality behind what he’s doing grows as his mania gets more intense. Those moments do show awareness and remorse, but maybe he’s also able to justify his behaviour to himself to an extent at the same time as feeling those things. I think it’s really complex and interesting. And yeah, I also think this attitude shifts again at the end of s5 and through Ian’s relationship with Caleb and Trevor. It would be cool to think about ‘I have a fucking boyfriend’ in s7 in this context too.

what do you think of ian cheating during his manic phase in s5? i’ve seen people commenting on those scenes like ian doesn’t feel remorse/guilt at this point because of the disorder. which IS plausible. but the way i see it, he DOES feel guilty but he literally can’t stop. i can imagine him warring with himself inside because he KNOWS it’s wrong and it’s worse because he’s doing this to mickey of all people. but he can’t stop. which is such an agonising mindset to be in. :(

i spoke about it before somewhere, but i think you’re right that he does feel guilt about it, and that he’s aware of what he’s doing – at least that’s how i interpret the patsy’s scene where he looks at himself in the mirror before he enters the stall. and i think you’re right that it’s something he’d feel really bad about (especially because he’s otherwise mostly faithful (except for when mickey returns lol) and someone who thinks cheating is a dealbreaker (with caleb and also kind of when he’s the one doing it to trevor)). i also think his mania and hypersexuality means that he’s not thinking clearly about it though, and that on top of being cheating, it’s also a continuation/example of how one of ian’s symptoms of mania is putting himself in really risky and harmful sexual situations – doing drugs at the club, engaging in the sex work he later feels shame about (which also happens in s8), and doing the porn. and in my mind, some of that ties into the issues with sex he has when not manic too, which are plentiful. so honestly i think that while he’s doing it, he has glimmers of guilt (mirror scene) but otherwise manages to compartmentalize it away, the same way he does with most of his other issues with sex, and that the full scope of his guilt didn’t (or won’t) arise until much later

just gonna complain into the void. fb just like gave me a targeted ad using my deadname? wtf facebook. where’s that info stored? sucks w it just being people i know let alone shitty algorithms. 

I have no idea why I'm very afraid to try and have this discussion, but I feel like a lot of the people in the Shameless fandom are very chill, so I'm gonna open up this can of worms. Can we talk about how Mickey, from seasons 1-7, is sometimes just blatantly racist, or says something racially insensitive, and no one says anything? Are we all just in agreement that it's in the past? Are we blaming Terry for his upbringing, so it's fine? Is it just something we're supposed to overlook cus it's Mickey? Was this settled a long time ago and I just didn't get the memo? Why? Why does no one say ANYTHING about it? He literally had Nazi shit, that Svetlana had to throw out when she moved in, and we're just supposed to be like, "haha classic Mickey," Like no! Fuck that!

I can understand that he's different now, how he was just the product of his environment, that he was truly a good person but was just misguided, ect. I'm not knocking the character, I'm just genuinely confused to why none of us are talking about it? Because it's a very interesting conversation to be had. When people discuss the flaws of any other character, there's like an in-depth list, but with Mickey, people are just like "He's flawed!" And either move on, or all of his flaws involve Ian, and it's like? We know Mickey has an amazing character arc. He's very complex. But when people talk about his improvements, they talk about either his romantic improvements or his hygiene improvements.

What about his moral improvements? Like what do you think it was like, living in a home where you were raised to hate, by a hateful man? It is canonically confirmed that Terry is a white supremacist, so Mickey had to grow up in that environment, and be taught in that environment. When you live with bigots, your worldview gets very fucked up, and usually what gets people out of that mindset that was so ingrained from the very beginning, is an outside source. This applies to Mickey's internalized homophobia too. Mickey had to live most of his life hating others and hating himself. That was, of course, until Ian, an outside source, showed Mickey that he didn't have to hate, and Ian did that by loving him.

How does someone, who is now older and wiser, cope with the fact they've hurt innocent people in the past? Do you think Mickey feels bad for what he's done to people? Because Mickey can be racist, and homophobic, and mean, and violent. These are his moral flaws. They are prominent from the beginning, but as the show continues, he becomes a better person. My question is, why don't we ever talk about it? We don't have to bash Mickey, but a discussion on the topic would be nice. I'm curious about the internal struggle of a person who was raised one way, but grows up to be the exact opposite. I wanna talk about moral ambiguity, and how he struggled with that when coming to terms with his sexuality. Also, I'm just super confused how Mickey can just say racist shit, and no one says one thing about it. Like not even a post in his defense, just complete silence on the matter.

mickey + hating cops, as he should 

Saying Uma Thurman is too old to reprise her role as Poison Ivy at 49 is a weak and sexist take. How old do you think Robert Downey Jr and Mark Ruffalo are? Let Harley have her milf.

WHAT DO YOU NEED?🐚

I really appreciate all of the above, but one thing I’d like to add is there’s quite a lot of casual transphobia in fics that mention/include Trevor and like, I get this is often canon typical but its rarely addressed or tagged, and tbh especially when fics have Mickey acting transphobically/dismissing Trevor as a rival because he’s trans, it’s a total fucking bummer. 

Not calling anyone out on this I think it’s just a thing we as a fandom all have to be more thoughtful about. 

Not to start a whole discourse, but I happened upon your thoughts regarding Trevor and even though his character was pretty awful, just how rare it is for trans men to see themselves represented on TV. Trevor’s character was very flawed, he was written that way, but my dislike of Trevor isn’t because he’s a trans man, it’s that he ultimately wasn’t the right man for Ian. So I guess with Trevor it’s really don’t hate the player hate the game, but it seems like not a lot of people can do that.

Hello, anon! Let me start out by saying I am not trans, and am in no way trying to speak for or over trans people, but I welcome conversation around Trevor because I feel strongly about the importance of him as trans representation. I do disagree about him being awful, but I get it that not everyone is going to like the same characters that I like.

The issue I’ve had, that I was referencing in this post, is that I see a large percentage of the fandom completely dismissing him as awful without acknowledging the positive impact his character had on Ian’s growth, and more importantly, the importance of the character to the trans community, specifically trans men. 

It’s completely okay to have a problem with Trevor’s character, I also have a lot of issues with the way he responded to Ian’s heartbreak over his mother and the way he dealt with Ian’s manic episode. I didn’t like how angry he got with Ian when he was earnestly trying to help Geneva. I also agree that Ian and Trevor didn’t really have great chemistry, and I don’t think they were right for each other. Those are all valid complaints! But there’s not a single character on that show that hasn’t done some fucked up shit, Ian and Mickey included, so it really rubs me the wrong way that Trevor doesn’t get the same pass that other characters do. I know that he wasn’t around for that long, so we don’t have the same attachment we do to the Gallagher siblings or Mickey, Mandy, Kev and V, but it’s really frustrating to see him constantly written off as The Worst Thing to happen to Ian, when he’s been so important to trans men who love the show. 

Trevor’s introduction also exposed the show’s massive mainstream audience to a lot of information about the LGBTQ community that they may not have gotten elsewhere. The writers worked with members of the LGBTQ community on all of those scenes, and as a non-binary lesbian, I felt very represented, and was so happy to see Ian’s gay education play out the way it did. It may have felt clumsy in places, but to quote transgender writer/actress/activist, Jen Richards, “clumsy is better than nothing.” (thank you to my dear friend, Gabe, who lays out the importance of representation ((specifically trans men, who are so underrepresented in media)), clumsy or otherwise, in this fantastic video).

If you would like some input on the character from a trans man (which I am not), please check out this post.

I’m starting a video series! Introducing #ShowMeOnScreen - a call to the film and television industry for more & better representation of trans men in media.

If you feel so inclined, drop a like & subscribe! LET’S MAKE A CHANGE!

Part Two