and a version of that wyllie where u can actually see him

What's really funny is Gale having all the arrogance of an Archwizard but the Netherese Orb ate all his magic (it's canon I don't have the quote but it's a thing) and THEN he got tadpoled which Wyll mentions Nerfs Them (used to be able to do a lot more prior to being infected, was more powerful)

So we have this level 1 wizard acting like hot shit and Tav being like??? Man he's got the Hubris AND HE DOES but like he USED TO BE ABLE TO BACK IT UP and now he cant but he still stands there in his velveteen pajamas acting like he hasn't just been nerfed down to nothing as well as having the literal goddess of magic break up with him like

Man got fucking STEPPED on by the universe and it DUG ITS HEEL IN for good measure and he still has the balls to pull out lines like

"Oh I meant are you STUDIED in magic? Are you a WIZARD? I thought not ✨✨✨✨"

Iirc the chosen women of Mystra aren't safe either. She takes their bodies and uses them as her own. The face we've been insulting this whole time isn't even hers. That's not Mystra's face. That's extremely disturbing.

Perhaps I come back here once my move is complete

do i adore when vampires are tortured about their very own nature? yes. do i live for it when they make their existence everyone else’s problem and embrace that shit? Also yes❤️

@abstractmoment

❝ ON THE CONTRARY , I FIND IT QUITE APT. not one i'd ever thought to make before , though. ❞ he , too , feels suddenly schoolboyish. the notion of impressing her with a meal he made with her in mind brings color to his cheeks he hopes to pass off as heat from the cooking pot. ❝ perhaps that's why i took to it so readily. well , that &. the fact there was always someone in my family cooking in any house i went to , ❞ he adds with a chuckle.

the memory of his family warms him. even before all this mess it has been awhile since he'd seen any of them. the comfort brings with it a sharp edge of longing , missing them , his mother most of all. gale would like to see her when they completed their mission. maybe em would like to meet her ? he'd like to think they'd get along well —

the thought is so easy it startles him from the rest. it's surprising how much it delights him in this moment. simultaneously , the fantasy &. its intensity embarrasses him to no end. schoolboyish indeed.

quickly , he ( somewhat sheepishly ) holds motions to the vegetables again. ❝ you can watch a little closer if you'd like. don't worry ! i'll only ask you to help by licking the spoon. ❞ his reason for not suggesting she take a more active role was as much for her as it was for the rest of them. though gale didn't think her mere presence would taint the process , anything else might.

the scent of venison has become ubiquitous with camp, and while the scent of cooking meat used to make her stomach turn, she has become used to it in time. it's an inevitable part of the adventuring experience, and when trying to feed a group of their size, small game is hardly an option. snares may supplement, but venison is the only game of appropriate volume to keep them fed native to the area. the introduction of spices, beyond the gathered vegetables, is a welcome change to the standard fare of their meals. rising with the smoke, woven in with the venison, is the scent of the spices and vegetables as they fry on the pan.

on all accounts, emilie avoids involvement in the cooking unless necessary. keeping a safe distance from the fire and the ingredients as if the mere act of breathing too near to them will turn an otherwise pleasant meal into something unpalatable. she knows her own skill, and providing the game is more than enough to suffice for her removal from the cooking rotation, still she likes to watch from a safe distance. at least on the nights when gale is doing it. the way he grins after a flourish of spices is added to the pan, as if mastering a particularly difficult spell or deciphering a complex passage. it's the challenges that seem to make him light up and she is in awe.

when he turns to her, she wishes she had something to occupy her hands. to act as if she was not simply gawking like a teenager with a crush and she has to collect herself rapidly. not gawking, not staring, simply admiring a skill she cannot master. ❛ no, no--- nothing like that. just watching you work. you may not think much of it but for those of us who don't know our way around a campfire... well... you may not care for the comparison, but it is a sort of magic. in its own way. ❜

Lmao keep it together, Gale

@abstractmoment

❝ OH I DON'T DOUBT THAT. MY TASTE BEING OR YOUR BEING A WALLFLOWER , ❞ he replies playfully. not that he has much ground to stand on with the former. he hasn't had so much as a sip of wine in centuries. &. his own reasoning for frequenting taverns both decadent &. degenerate haven't exactly been purely for the joy of it. the spawn's own insides roil at the sudden memories &. he forgets to ask what she thinks of his selection.

he does see the urge to protest cross her features &. he almost rolls his eyes until she realizes there's no way out of his observation. but astarion will allow her a way out of the conversation. for now. it was about time for someone else to be on the receiving end of one of those deep , uncomfortable talks they'd become prone to having with one another.

❝ YES , thank the gods. i don't know how you do it for weeks or more at a time , em , really. personally , i'm very glad rowena has so kindly offered her home up to sleep. as nice as the suite at the elfsong is , nothing quite beats an upper city estate. ❞

❛ before leaving, i wasn't one to frequent bars much regardless--- i imagine your taste in wine is far more... discerning... than anything i've gotten from minor hovels over the years. ❜ it's a primarily accurate statement at the heart of it, to say she's never had a taste of a spirit old enough to make her seem an infant in comparison would be a lie. she'd even developed a taste for it at certain points of her life, but it's been decades since she's had something more sophisticated than the offerings of a backwater tavern. she reaches for her goblet, and nods an additional thanks to the bartender, who spares her a not unkind glance but little more before she raises it to her lips. it's heavy, decadent, she expects nothing less of astarion's taste and the anxiety in her gut squirms violently as if rioting at the thought of being quelled. she does not swallow it all in one mouthful, but perhaps slightly more than she should.

she spares the vampire a glance next, and she wants to protest that her discomfort is so obvious but it's something she knows better than to attempt to persuade him otherwise. there are some things you simply come to know when traveling together long enough. where to pitch your tent to avoid snoring, who can't hold their ale, who is saddled with anxiety that borders on the debilitating. her mouth twitches, still attempting to bite off the root of the urge to say that she's fine, or worse yet ask the bartender for the rest of the bottle because a simple glass will not be enough. ❛ ---at least we're out of the woods now, no more night watches, or wild animals, back to society. i imagine that brings you some comfort at least. ❜

WAITING FOR HIS LOVER | Baldur's Gate III

Enjoy your time with the others. Bless them with your presence.

@abstractmoment

SHE DOES NOT ACKNOWLEDGE THE THANKS. this is duty , nothing more ; a means to an end the party happens to benefit from. but perhaps there's a fraction of tension gone from her shoulders , a hint at momentary softening to her features.

eyes follow emilie's movements until she's seated &. only return to watch once she's settled. lae'zel had no expectations either way of an answer but respects the candor. or as much as is being offered.

❝ i often feel much the same. we must make the most efficient use of our time , even more so when we have so little of it. but we still require rest all the same. i would rather a modicum of recovery than to rise the next morning as hindrance because i received none at all. ❞

her gaze stays fixed in the distance but there are other tells as she speaks. returning tension to her frame , setting of her jaw , a small press of fingers into her crossed arms. it's as much an admonishment as it is advice.

❛ i understand, and we appreciate the sacrifice--- all of us. ❜ she means it as well, and while she might have prepared herself for the turn onto herself, em has to pause to configure a response. lowering herself to a seated position, she knows that saying they need the resources won't be a sufficent answer for lae'zel.

❛ ...i have difficulty sleeping. i would much rather be productive than spend hours waiting for something that won't come. it feels wasteful." it is truthful, albeit not the full scope of the problem. as bad as the inability to sleep is, slipping into the black is more terrifying. ❛ aside from that, it's kept us furnished with game without detracting from our journey.

@abstractmoment

HE EXPRESSES SHOCK WITH A CYNICAL NARROWING OF THE EYES , A HALF TILT OF THE HEAD. this was unexpected. kindness always was so surely it must come with a clause. there is no such thing as a free meal. he retains his smile but makes it sharper.

❝ how generous of you. why ? not that i don't believe you've been deprived before , ❞ he adds , thinking of the still ambiguous ( to him ) nature of her magical pact. astarion silences the memory of a desperate deal of his own. ❝ but surely between our little wizard &. the countless enemies we insist on making i should be swimming in in blood. i know what rowena gets out of our deal , so what do you want ? just to see how it feels ? you wouldn't be the first. ❞

she's taken aback at the reaction, but only faintly. she isn't entirely unfamiliar with the cruelty that people are capable when faced with that which they do not understand. instead of obeying the instinct that tells her that this is not the time, nor is it worth speaking on, she pushes back against it in her mind. of course rowena consents, she isn't a monster. crossing her arms over her chest in a gesture self protective than posturing.

❛ that... isn't why I wanted to talk to you. i mean, it is, but that's not what I was going to say at all--- ❜ it shouldn't be hard to speak, but the words stick in her throat and she feels nauseated as her own experiences rise to the forefront of her mind. ❛ ...what i wanted to say, is that i know what it is to be... deprived. i expect your needs will be well met by rowena's generosity, but i wanted to say, if she's ever unable to help for any reason-- busy, or away, or simply unable to--- you can feed on me if you need it. no questions asked. ❜

D&D Vampire Lore Dump #1

Feeding and Diet It's actually more complicated than just "they bite you and eat your blood." Plus what they're able to eat; how often they need to eat; what happens to you if they bite you and what happens to them if they don't feed- spoiler: it's unpleasant. Incidentally, you should reload and kill Cazador again.

(I was comparing stuff across editions and compiling it into something more coherent and then figured I'd info dump about it in case my fixations are useful to somebody out there.)

DISCLAIMER: There are two things to note about the lore presented here: First, while the standard stat block in the monster manual is the default, in terms of lore vampires have this annoying tendency to be incredibly, stupidly varied. They are magical monstrosities ruled by the power of symbolism and superstition above anything else.

The next is that D&D is decades old, spans five editions, several settings and hundreds of writers. One guy establishes a piece of lore, and then the next picks it up goes "nah" and writes something else. I collected info from four different source books, all from different editions, which naturally don't entirely agree on how vampires work. Lore never stays consistent and may contradict itself. You may see information somewhere else from a source I don't have that contradicts what I wrote here. If you read this and like some of this stuff but not other bits, take the good and ditch the rest.

Basically, in D&D, canon is what you decide it is.

Feeding | "Biology" | Hierarchy | Weaknesses and Cures | Psychology

They only need to feed once in a 24 hour period. Vampires can survive between 3-9 months of starvation, but it's a terrible idea.

There are three different categories of "Undead Hunger." Vampires have two of them and actually need to consume more than one thing to stay "healthy": Blood and life force.

The blood is obvious. This is categorised as a "diet dependency." It's required to preserve their bodies and powers, and without it their powers are suppressed as their bodies begin to shut down. Ultimately, if they don't get any blood then they revert into a corpse like state where they're trapped in their own body as it begins to wither and mummify. They're trapped in a coma, vaguely aware of the passing of time in flashes of awareness until somehow they are fed blood. If they ever wake up again, they will probably wake up feral and absolutely ravenous.

Vampires rely on the victim's blood pressure to expel blood from the wound they create, lapping and mouthing at the wound rather than actually sucking on it. Being bitten is a highly pleasurable experience that victims can't help but desire, even when they know they shouldn't.

While the damage done remains, the wounds from a Vampire bite closes itself quickly after the feeding (assuming you're still alive). It does however leave a mark. The bite mark itself is often "less than half an inch in length", and leaves behind a significant bruise that causes no pain or sensitivity to touch. Other side effects include fatigue and a weakened immune system.

Vampires typically target sleeping victims (less likely to fight back) and favour the blood of their own race above others. So theoretically, Astarion finds elf blood tastes best.

Drinking animal blood tastes bland and is health-wise akin to drinking tainted water: yes it might keep you alive in desperate times, but it's ultimately bad for you and will probably make you ill.

A vampire's secondary feeding requirement is called an "inescapable craving", which means that if a vampire doesn't get that fix then their hunger begins to devour them instead. The pain is described as a spike boring into the vampire's brain, obscuring their awareness. They begin to obsess over feeding to the exclusion of everything else, they become willing to take ridiculous levels of risk to stop the hunger as they become more and more desperate. As they are consumed they become progressively more feral until they're just a rampaging mindless horror driven only by horrific hunger. For vampires, their inescapable craving is life force, which a vampire leeches from their prey through touch leaving the victim weak. Direct skin contact isn't required, if you're wearing full plate and/or the vampire is wearing gloves and they lay a hand on you they can still drain you. Mechanically these were combat abilities, energy/level draining occurred when a vampire struck a target with their own body (usually their hands). Before 5e hit them with a nerf bat, vampires could permanently weaken you this way (you could lose character levels from this). 5e also seems to have rolled life drain into the biting, so a vampire can consume your blood and energy at the same time.

Post feeding, a vampire starts to look alive. Their skin is flushed and warm and they feel elated and energetic. In contrast, a vampire that hasn't been feeding properly becomes more corpse like and feels "sluggish" (I'm interpreting that as flu-like symptoms). It's purely emotional however, the vampire is no less capable and dangerous and suffers no mechanical penalties.

Vampires can feed on other vampires, which is actually more filling than living humanoid blood and gives them the ability to communicate telepathically for a few hours. They don't like it though. If a vampire drinks from another vampire then they can be controlled by that vampire and the link forces them to feel affection for each other against their will until it wears off. The results of both vampires in question feeding on each other is described as "debilitating" since they both paradoxically become enslaved to the other's will and forced to "love" each other creating an absolute dysfunctional mess of control, obsession and resentment. The good news is that it only lasts a few hours.

Some vampires can eat regular food (no nutritional value in it for them) while others would regurgitate it if they tried. As they retain their tongues, vampires can also taste food. That said, it's a bad idea for them to eat garlic, even if they can eat solid food.

Some kinds of vampires don't drink blood. There's all kinds of weird and wonderful stuff a vampire might be required to consume instead. Spinal fluid stands out. Or the bit about ones who drain the ocular fluid from your eyes. Gale might find interesting things to talk about with the magic eating ones who prey on mages. They're much less common, probably something to do with most people not finding that very sexy. I don't think any of them exist on Toril.

Astarion being an embroiderer breaks my heart, because traditionally it was a skill so tied to daylight. If you looked at illustrations of embroiderers before the advent of electric lights they're always outside or near large sunny windows. Placing intricate stitches with nothing but candlelight to guide you would be a nightmare. In fact, it was outright forbidden in most professional workshops. An artist couldn't be sure of the stitch placement and most importantly the colors were dulled.

Something I love about confronting Cazador is how he obviously never processes that Astarion has friends until it's too late.

Petras and Dalyria must have mentioned that Astarion wasn't alone when they met him, but when you read Cazador's journal? He's 100% fixated on Astarion. How Astarion stood in the sun, how Astarion was willing and able to disobey him. And when Astarion shows up, Cazador barely acknowledges the party at all - and sure, that's partly because this is Astarion's moment in the narrative, but Cazador doesn't so much as ask why these random strangers are there! They're not part of his plans, so they don't exist.

And then they immediately save his errant spawn from the ritual and start beating his ass.

Just. What must have been going through Cazador's head when that fight starting turning against him? 'Is that... the Blade of Frontiers? Why is a monster hunter - and is that a cleric? - helping a vampire spawn? An undead? Ah, but they must be treating it as a necessary evil to have a chance to slay me, of course - hold on, why is the cleric healing Astarion? Why does that wizard keep Counterspelling everything I'm casting at Astarion, why waste the spells when I'm not even targeting him? Did... did that druid just cast Daylight on Astarion's weapons? And that brute of a tiefling - that's not just disgust in her eye when she looks at me, it's fury - and she keeps putting herself in front of Astarion, why in the hells would she - she's running right at me- '

I hope that one of the last things Cazador ever knew was the choking realisation that Astarion didn't just come back strong, or free. Astarion came back loved.

anonymous asked : why won't you interact with anyone who writes ascended!astarion

the short answer : i don't want to.

the longer answer : i want him to be happy &. healing.

the long answer : exactly what larian said about the ending : it's objectification of astarion which is something i don't want to explore with people i don't trust. it's not even only if you think ascended astarion is sexy or not , he hasn't grown or healed in a way that allows him to see he isn't the sexy vampire seduction trope. he's supposed to be an inversion of that , so allowing him to ascend doesn't sit right with me regarding his trauma. the only time i'd be willing to explore it is with my friends because i know they aren't on the literal objectification side of things or anything else that might make me uncomfortable.

anonymous ask.

I should be allowed to equip Scratch with swords