away-from-anthills - Tumblr blog

away-from-anthills · 2 years

Text

i’m not sure if i’ll ever get back to writing afa (and if i will it’ll probably be in a different form and no longer affiliated with warrior cats, as i’ve been sorta moving away from the series given (gestures) Everything) so. would you like the rest of how this would have gone to be spoiled for you? if so read on

remember: where we last left off, antstar has killed stoatslink to cover up sparkthistle's murder, shadowclan is going insane bc their leader is an adulterer (and worse a code violator), and thunderclan riverclan and skyclan are spinning in the corner.

- eventually, shadowclan's situation culminates in a full-on revolt led by the older shadowclan cats against currantstar and his philosophies of rejecting traditional shadowclan culture in favor of facades and mass appeal. it's left unclear what happens to currantstar; antstar thinks he sees him in the window of a twoleg house, but it could be his mind playing tricks on him. when asked, currantstar's sister simply says she 'never had a brother'. sleekstar, currantstar's former mate, is the one who becomes the next leader. antstar is terrified of the implication, especially as he had previously thought of currantstar as hope for his situation

- so naturally when talonscar, an elder of windclan, starts to idolize the revolution of shadowclan, whitetooth and antstar scheme to starve talonscar to death, subtly, in such a way that nobody notices the elder slip out from underneath them. this is really the moment where antstar's killings turn from reactive to proactive- no longer is he killing those that clue into his crimes, but those who -could-.

- some time later and antstar and his deputy/former friend, russetfoot, begin more and more to disagree on things, eventually culminating with a long argument in the rain in which russet accuses ant of being a horrible leader. ant thinks he sees whitetooth lunge in to kill the cat, and so antstar follows through, and after a long close fight antstar manages to kill his deputy... only to realize that whitetooth never jumped in and simply watched the whole thing from the sidelines, and that for the first time antstar has committed murder completely on his own accord.

- the two return to camp with russet's body, swearing an attacker got to all three and killed russetfoot. and it's fine, the clan believes antstar once again even though some of them do find it strange. antstar takes all of this completely fine (Lie. He has 97 mental illnesses)

- time passes, and antstar’s paranoia begins to die down a bit. whitetooth never refers to the murders, and antstar wonders if they even really happened. he begins to really grow into a leader, leading his clan in a defense against shadowclan and establishing further trade routes et al with riverclan. toadpool is appointed in russetfoot’s place, and toad is fine, if passive and lacking real leadership

- pigeonstar however is still PISSED antstar, yknow, gave the order to kill pigeon’s son (even if it was not completely intentional). so are pigeon’s other two children, the volatile nettlebark and the detached birchtail. nettlebark sets out on a revenge quest to get antstar back in revenge, but his attempts are unsuccessful, and he ends up being killed by a windclan patrol in retaliation. pigeonstar is taking the ‘btw your son was killed by the same clan that killed your other son when he tried to get revenge for your other son’ thing as well as you’d think

- riverclan, in addition, is also becoming more demanding. they continue to fare poorly and windclan is being driven a little up the wall by how they’re treating them. antstar wants to help riverclan and keep his allies there, but his own clan is unwilling, and the threat of public opinion is enough for antstar to revoke all help to riverclan and leave them alone.

- naturally, at the next gathering tulipstar does not come, instead replaced by squirrelstar. thunderclan finally got their chance to claim sunningrocks from riverclan, in the process killing off the last of tulipstar’s lives. she died alone on the battlefield. squirrelstar is naturally sorta pissed at antstar; it was a battle antstar amplified that cost squirrelstar’s mother her life and now tulipstar has been killed because antstar didn’t offer support. (confusing? yes, as clan politics are). windclan and riverclan relations cool and eventually freeze over; neither are outright hostile but they are no longer friends.

- terrified now that he has no ‘real’ allies, antstar starts becoming genuinely frightening in public and not just Some Wimp That Is Scary After Dark. he becomes a cold leader, not harsh on his clan but harsh on others, becoming the very image of the stoic clan leader he initially feared so much at his first gathering. the other original leaders bow out also. tatteredstar passes away in her sleep after so many years. pigeonstar’s daughter and last remaining kin, birchtail, disowns her father and moves to shadowclan. lost, tired, and alone in all the world, pigeonstar escapes his clan in the night, and it’s mentioned his pawsteps led to nowhere and no cat knew what became of him. with fear- and a coil of pride- antstar realizes he’s the last of the leaders he once knew, and the one who’s been leader the longest. - windclan changes as well. toadpool passes and antstar makes spiderfoot, his old apprentice, his deputy. some cats become more and more close to antstar, others seem simply passive towards him. whitetooth remains windclan’s medic, although marblepaw- marbleface, now- is becoming the more physically capable of the medics as she is now an adult in her prime. she still, however, is terrified of her mentor for the murders she witnessed all those seasons ago.

- antstar himself has come to want children, and he and houndnose have them together. there is no romance between the two, he seems to see it as a kindness because she has never had a surviving litter before. (this is not presented as a good view of things.) there are four kits, antstar names two of them mudkit and tulipkit while houndnose names the other two acornkit… and talonkit, after talonscar, unaware the father of her litter murdered them.

- antstar is as scared about this as you’d think. while he is very close with his sole daughter tulippaw, he is very neglectful of his son talonpaw out of the fear of what that name means to him. whitetooth suggests antstar show his neglected son affection- and, more importantly, keep his paws on windclan leadership- by making talonpaw marbleface’s apprentice, but antstar has to think about it. - windclan meanwhile is like ‘hey we never did catch the murderer of sparkthistle, stoatslink, and russetfoot’. antstar panics and blames it on birchshine, some random Guy in the clan, who is then exiled and killed by his own former friends under the assumption birch is a windclan threat.

- whitetooth is like ‘hey thats a dumb decision LOL do better you idiot’ and someone walks in on antstar and whitetooth discussing this. antstar panics, says he found whitetooth confessing to being an accomplice, and whitetooth is similarly exiled. whitetooth refuses to answer why they did anything that they did, and when they’re exiled, they just seem to disappear- not even their scent remains on the territory a day later.

- antstar is like. Ok. Thank fuck that’s done. but he gets signs from starclan- signs to beware spiderfoot, and that she will be the one to ultimately kill him. naturally he panics and exiles spiderfoot for no clear reason, and becomes even more authoritarian- now any cat who speaks out against him may be exiled, too. some cats leave with spiderfoot, and antstar continues to panic. spiderfoot is, after all, one of the few cats he couldn’t bring himself to kill.

- spiderfoot and co. nestle in riverclan, and squirrelstar is sympathetic to their plight. antstar, feeling as though he has no other options, chooses to attack riverclan for no reason in the witching hours, hoping his forces- and not him- will drive off spiderfoot. it has to be done, hasn’t it? but riverclan has thrived under squirrelstar’s leadership, and they- and spiderfoot and co.- fight windclan back. windclan’s warriors, who fail to understand why antstar has chosen to attack riverclan, quickly turn on their leader; antstar’s loyalists are killed or driven out and antstar himself is chased away. some cats finally put two and two together and think antstar is exiling all these cats because he himself has murders to hide. marbleface, in her sole line of dialogue in the entire story, confirms this

- some suggest to spiderfoot she leave antstar alone, now that he’s on his own and has fled windclan. spiderfoot however responds she’s not done- she needs some sort of closure. and so, she follows antstar’s scent trail, along the gorge, until she finds him there- broken, wounded, alone.

- antstar is on his last life. the old tom can sense that even now spiderfoot doesn’t want to kill her old mentor, despite everything; and he doesn’t want to kill her. he could, of course- he’s injured but still capable enough, and they’re right by the gorge so he could throw her in easily. but… but for once he declines. he knows he’s on his way out anyway. at least now… at least now he should stop trying to outrun the world, and face the inevitable punishment lying after his death with dignity

- antstar backs from spiderfoot, offers his apologies that he couldn’t resolve everything neatly for her and wishes her luck, and leaps backwards, into the gorge, following all his victims before him. as he falls he thinks of his entire life, all the mistakes he made. and yet… he feels more peaceful, more peaceful than he’s felt in years, more peaceful than he was ever since the story began. he looks out at the sunrise. it’s the most beautiful thing he ever sees- and then, as he hits the rocks below- everything goes black.

- spiderfoot watches the waves carry antstar’s body away. he didn’t appoint another deputy after her, and as windclan has let her back in, she has now inherited leadership. the story ends on her, alone, walking through the grass back to camp, preparing herself to become windclan’s next leader- and, perhaps, in spite of everything- stop the cycle once and for all.

(will she, though? the narrative does not seem confident.)

#not story text #(ish.)#away from anthills #antstar

7 notes · View notes

away-from-anthills · 2 years

Text

another writing project i have (and a much more Original one)

The Novel, Explained

hello! this is a blog i decided to make specifically for song of the sky, my novel. initially i was only posting about it on my main but it was getting kind of clogged and hard to follow so i figured this would be better. this is just to organize things mainly.

song of the sky is a novel adaptation of wolfgang amadeus mozart's opera the magic flute, his last opera, although it takes the story in a vastly different direction (for good reason, the original... well it didn't age well, let's say.) it takes place among a redwall-style feline society in the heart of chicago as two rivalrous rulers, the starblazer (a former revolutionary) and king sarastro (the king she dethroned), battle it out for a chance to decide the future of the city. both realize they are getting on in years, and that their reigns will therefore inevitably end- but, if they can claim their power once and for all, perhaps they will live forever through an heir. and so they fight over pamina, the starblazer's daughter and only heir to the entire city, for their chance at winning their seemingly-endless feud. their battle soon falls upon the shoulders of tamino, a little bengal housecat who just might have a destiny beyond even his wildest dreams...

you might remember this basic concept back when it was @/ensemblecomic, so if you followed me then a lot of this might sound familiar (although i've made quite a lot of changes this go around).

MAIN TAGS:

character tags (the main characters are #tamino, #pamina, #the starblazer, #king sarastro, #papageno, #monostatos, #the speaker, and #the forsaken molly)

#illustration (my drawings of them)

#resource (stuff that goes over lore/character relations/plot content/other good to know stuff)

#aesthetics (pictures that just fit the general vibe of the story)

#funnies (silly nonsense posts)

#dealing with schikaneder (anything to do with the original opera and adapting it into song of the sky)

#misc (anything that doesn't fit into the above)

MY OTHER BLOGS:

@madmozarteanfelinefantasy (main)

@you-are-starclan (arg/fanclan blog where the readers play god)

@away-from-anthills (sigh. warrior cats fan story)

@an-ordinary-housecat (warrior cats design blog)

#also expect a new afa update first week of february

27 notes · View notes

away-from-anthills · 2 years

Text

welcome to starclan

have you ever wanted to play god?

do you think you could do a better job than the starclan in the books?

welcome to starclan! yes, you are part of starclan now. it's always warm here, and there is always prey to eat and friends to talk to. you also have full jurisdiction, along with your starclan peers, over what happens down on earth below. do you understand?

thank goodness you got here when you did! you have been assigned to watch over a little clowder of cats that have just formed. they are very scared, and very lost, and they don't quite know what to do with themselves. but they trust starclan more than they do their own paws, and they trust that you will be able to guide them in what is Right and Correct. do you understand? do you understand.

every week in starclan, which feels like a season on earth, you will be given an update via this blog on what the clowder is up to. using discord and polls, you will then be able to vote on what you'd like to happen to them next. you cannot fully control how individual cats will act, but you can control who lives and who dies, who has kittens, who becomes the next deputy, and so on.

here is an initial google form to collect feedback on this project and whether or not it should go ahead. i will try to publish the first update this sunday, january 9, and publish each update on sundays. (however i am busy so please don't hold me to this.) on that day, the discord will also be officially opened.

#trying out a New Dastardly Idea while i'm also working on this and other stuff

110 notes · View notes

away-from-anthills · 2 years

Photo

The Antstar

I’ve been using some of my free time to put together a Warriors (or just cat in general) themed Picrew! Feel free to check it out if you’re interested, I’m very proud of it! https://picrew.me/image_maker/1255960

#also don’t worry i’m NOT dead! college applications are just Going TF On rn #hang tight! new update will come... soon!#antstar

636 notes · View notes

away-from-anthills · 2 years

Text

some guys who will be surprise tools that will help us later (also smokebark)

#warrior cats #warrior cats ocs #juniperfang #sleekpetal #birchtail #nettlebark #smokebark #my art

13 notes · View notes

away-from-anthills · 2 years

Text

chapter thirteen-

He tried as hard as he could to ignore the wails of Goldenpaw and Milkpaw as he began his speech.

Antstar had carefully rehearsed this over and over in his head the night prior. He couldn’t do it too naturally, of course, or they could catch onto him. But with just the right intonation- just the right worry-

“Stoatslink’s body, as you may have seen, was discovered in the gorge this morning.”

Antstar could hear whispers from the cats below as they continued to inspect the body.

“His wounds smell like rogue…” he could hear Talonscar whisper. He hoped to StarClan- and whoever lurked above them- that he didn’t smell like what he was convinced he was.

“However, the obvious wounds all over the body lead me to believe that this was no accident, nor did Stoatslink die by falling in. In fact, I think something foul is afoot. Before he died, Stoatslink told me he believed Sparkthistle had not-“ -he had to swallow the sickly lump that was forming in this throat- “had not been killed, but rather… murdered by rogues.”

Again, he tried to ignore his Clanmates’ hushed whispering. But he couldn’t help but fear they already knew, somehow, and that somehow-

“Specifically, I believe, Stoatslink was worried about rogues who live near the Moonstone, who he swore he had seen on our territory. He was investigating the death- as some of you might have been able to tell- when he died. I believe…”

He had to stop his amber eyes from welling up with panic and with grief at his own actions. What have I done?

“I believe the rogues likely killed Stoatslink to silence him. We need to drive them out. It is what Stoatslink would have wanted, and what we need to do in order to keep our Clan safe.”

“Where are they?” growled Rockscratch with anger, and Antstar nearly leapt off the rock with fright until he realized that the russet tabby’s anger was directed at the rogues. “We need to stop them!”

“I’ll come too!” said Juniperfang. Antstar had to admit that Juniperfang made him uneasy. Only a scant few moons ago, the tabby tom had been a loner, a stranger to Clan life. Already now he was one of the more militant cats, and he only scarcely visited the elders’ den to talk to Audrey and Shrike.

More cats nodded in agreement- Spiderfoot, then Emberheart, then Twigpaw. Goldenpaw had ran off into the apprentice’s den, followed by her mentor Webwhisker, Milkpaw was angrily trying to convince Toadpool through her tears that she should join them.

“It’s decided then. Russetfoot-“ Antstar scanned the clearing for his deputy- “Russetfoot, could you-“

Suddenly Whitetooth appeared at the base of the rock and flicked their head back, indicating they needed to talk to Antstar privately about the deputy. Antstar felt panic swallow his heart, but he nodded, trying to keep his cool.

“Alright, then. Rockscratch, Spiderfoot, Emberheart, Juniperfang, Lilystone; I’ll lead you all on a patrol towards where Stoatslink thought the rogues were. Molethroat, Toadpool, Sparrowpetal, Birchshine, Shadeflower; you all guard camp.” He puffed out his chest to look authoritative, although the weight of said chest swayed a bit as it sat atop trembling limbs. “This is a very serious matter, and it only confirms Stoatslink’s suspicions. We need to act now.”

Already WindClan lined itself up for defense. Houndnose and Cherrycloud were taking kits inside the nursery for protection- even Brindlekit, even though she squeaked protests of “But I wanna go get the rogues, too!”

As WindClan shuffled into place, Antstar padded over to Whitetooth’s side. There was a touch of consternation to the white cat’s long-snouted face, their ears attuned back towards the medic den.

“It’s Stripedwing’s litter,” they said quietly. “While it does seem that Aphidkit has healed from the sickness, Dewkit passed away in the night, joining her brother Mousekit in StarClan.”

A cold shock of grief grappled Antstar’s belly.

“The one ill one left is Thistlekit, and he’s so small and feeble I’d be surprised if he made it through. I need to stay here to care for them, and Russetfoot wishes to stay here also.”

“Of course,” said Antstar. In that moment Antstar nearly forgot of all the horror of the night preceding- Stoatslink’s last garbled cry, the smell of the blood, the way the yellow eyes that had once been his stared at Antstar after death. Perhaps he was a murderer now, but Antstar only felt softness for kits, and he always would.

Only after turning away to lead the patrol did Antstar feel uneasy without his constant companion behind him. He hoped the rogues wouldn’t spit out the truth as they were chased out- or, if they were, that nobody would believe them, and that their words would be forgotten like carved sand on the shore.

They set out, into the grass, which was yellowing and thinning with the autumn air. The sky was white, but not sunless; the clouds were thin like an amniotic sac and the sun’s light still peeked through. Still, there was an unnerving feeling to it- Antstar did not want to think about how the sky wore Stoatslink’s pelt color.

“There!” he heard Juniperfang cry, and he turned his dark head to see the rogues. They had not noticed Antstar, but they had become aware of the patrol’s presence. The rogues got up from the dead hare they had been sharing- evidently not their kill, judging from the tinge of rot around it- and slowly advanced towards them. They looked uncannily at Antstar- one of them seemed as if he were about to say something, but the thought came and went- and then Juniperfang leapt- and then- and then-

Antstar could not remember anything more.

He knew, objectively, he had been there. The rogues had been chased off, judging by the boastful cries of Juniperfang and Spiderfoot. He knew he had participated; his paws were flecked with blood and one of the rogues had scratched his snout. One of the rogues had been killed from the group effort, but Antstar could not remember which one and how; he only knew because Juniperfang seemed disturbingly proud of it and Lilystone had told him to shut up. It was as if Antstar’s brain, fed up with the tightropes of panic he always balanced on, had blotted things out; as if the fear that one of the rogues would reveal his secret overtook his memory.

His troubles were not over, however; one turn towards camp and he made out the figures of a SkyClan patrol.

“SkyClan? What are they doing here?” Spiderfoot asked, her voice fraught with suspicion. He narrowed his eyes to get a closer look. He could make out Hopscratch, Pigeonstar’s deputy, talking to Russetfoot about something; behind her were a whole corral of SkyClanners he could only recognize from prior gatherings. Once he stepped into camp and the warriors behind him dispersed to tell their Clanmates about the rogue fight, he caught the attention of Hopscratch’s amber eyes, and she got up from Russetfoot to talk to him.

She was a short, stubby thing, especially unique among a Clan renowned for their flexibility. She was mostly white, with brown patches covering her head and back, and her tail was only about a third of the usual size. Her ears were torn and the fur around her muzzle was slightly bushy, but the most notable thing about her was her back leg. It was small, shriveled, and black; over time it had been worn down to only a stump. Antstar had heard the story why: When she had been born, her umbilical cord wrapped around her leg and strangled it, cutting off its blood supply and rendering it unusable.

Despite her injury however she had grown to be quite nimble. She had to be, after all; nimbleness was SkyClan’s thing as they raced among the treetops.

“Hello, Antstar,” she said, dipping her head respectfully.

Antstar braced himself for attack, but upon realizing potential battle would take a moment he too dipped his head to her.

“Pigeonstar had sent us here with the intent of attack,” she explained bluntly. Antstar looked at the cats behind her. SkyClan was no ThunderClan, but their claws and teeth were sharp; some looked more willing for a fight than others. He could recognize the spotted calico who had attacked him a little less than a moon prior; she eyed him pointedly. “However,” Hopscratch continued, “upon finding out about the tragedy that has occurred this morning, I and my Clanmates figured it would be in our best mutual interest if we did not attack. Besides, I worry that attacks over such personal reasons would ultimately harm us both.”

Antstar tried to apologize for Stoneclaw’s death profusely, but he couldn’t quite get the words out. Hopscratch simply nodded, and then raised a paw to quiet him. “We’ve all done things we regret in the heat of the moment- deaths in battle among them. One of my own children, once, accidentally killed an apprentice in battle, and she was torn up about it for moons. I told her over and over- she didn’t know, it was purely accidental, there was no ill will about it- but even to this day, she’s never quite gotten over it. I would not want the same to happen to you, or to whoever was the one to kill Stoneclaw in the first place. The guilt I saw in her eyes is something I couldn’t wish upon even the blackest of Dark Forest spirits.”

I’m already there, Hopscratch, he wanted to tell her. I’m already there.

But no sooner had she discussed it than she organized the patrol to leave. “There will be no fight today, Clanmates,” she instructed them, and they lined up orderly to go back across Fourtrees and home.

“Should I worry about Pigeonstar in the future?” Antstar asked. Sure, his deputy had stopped him this time- but it was an open secret Hopscratch was considering retiring soon, and whoever Pigeonstar would elect in her place was likely someone younger and less wise to the world around them.

“Pigeonstar? Oh, no. He’ll shape himself around his grief and live with it eventually. It’s his other son you have to worry about.”

And away they went, over the WindClan plains, before Antstar could ask anything more.

“The rogues were… dispatched easily.”

Antstar said his words quickly, trying not to think about how wrong it felt on his tongue. He knew it was right. They killed Stoatslink. They were chased out far beyond the territories. Nothing more and nothing less needed to be said.

But something gnawed at him. He pretended to himself that he had simply never gotten over how tall the Gathering rock was- hell, even on the Tallrock at home he felt a bit queasy- but something whispered to him, in a harsh, lawful tone, that he knew damned well what it really was.

“That’s good to hear,” responded Tulipstar, nodding her head. The full moon gave her white-and-ginger fur a particular glow, maternal but speckled with the chill of the brisk autumn air she breathed. “We extend our deepest condolences for Sandwhisker, Stoatslink, Mousekit, and Dewkit.”

Antstar had to crane his neck to catch his breath. “In other news,” he continued, “despite their- father’s passing- Stoatslink’s daughters passed their assessments with flying colors, and have received their warrior names- Goldencloud and Milknose!”

The rumble of cheers that spilled from below was enough to drown out Antstar’s worries. Away went the grief around him, and Goldencloud and Milknose seemed proud enough of their names to still bask in the cries around them. Antstar, however, still felt uncomfortable talking to them; he wanted so badly to apologize and yet he knew he never could. Even naming them just felt wrong; as if he had killed a mother bird standing over her nest and was now making off with her eggs.

Tulipstar began to speak about her own Clan; since the battle that had claimed the lives of Redfeather and Trufflepelt, they had enjoyed a peaceful moon. The Clan had somehow managed to catch a small deer, and two apprentices had received their warrior names a tad early for it. And finally, Velvetshade had bore two more kits- welcome arrivals, as the RiverClan nursery had not had more than two kits in moons. There was a ripple of cheers for the new names Tulipstar announced- Shortfeather! Lightstone! Gracklekit! Plumkit! Lilackit!- and then attention turned to ThunderClan. Tatteredstar similarly took the time to mourn the two ThunderClan toms that had died in the battle- Rooktalon, she said, would have made for a fine leader had he ever gotten the chance, and Frostsnarl was a very intense fighter who had more than proved his worth. Antstar flinched as he remembered how the tom had attacked him and ripped Trufflepelt in two- and, perhaps even more haunting, how Frostsnarl himself had met his end at dozens of RiverClan claws and teeth. But the old molly had seen more than her fair share of battle, and it all sounded like a script she had said before many times. Onward she went to describe how her Clan had built a new wall of brambles around the nursery to protect it, and how there had been an incident where Gourdfang was taken by humans but had managed to escape- but besides that, life in ThunderClan had gone on as usual, forever preparing for the next in a wheel of the endless battles that defined their lives.

There was sudden quiet- neither the SkyClan or ShadowClan leaders seemed to want to speak. They stared at one another, for the longest time; Currantstar’s emerald eyes boring into Pigeonstar’s teal ones, until at last Pigeonstar stepped forward- although the look he gave Currantstar told everyone that it wasn’t that the flint-gray tom was intimidated, or lacked will; it was that he thought their little silent feud was a waste of time.

Pigronstar looked… tired.

“SkyClan mourns those we lost in the battle as well, Bumbleshade… and-“ -he cleared his throat- “and Stoneclaw.”

Antstar half-expected the tom to go into a long spiel about his son and the life he had, just as Pigeonstar had been eager to talk about his children before, but just as he had touched on the topic he had left it at that. Onward he went to describe new matters. The teal-eyed tom wasn’t the convulsing mess he had been over his son’s body- thank God for that- but he wasn’t nearly as boisterous as he had previously been. He was just as prickly as ever, though. For a moment, a tussle between Weevilclaw and Beetleclaw of ThunderClan and Buzzardsplash of RiverClan interrupted Pigeonstar’s spiel, and he reacted with a sharp cry of “Watch it, dipshits!” before resuming and whispering a private, barbed comment about the three cats’ parentage. SkyClan living had been quiet since the battle; the only new development was that three kits had become apprentices, one of which was training to be a medic. As Pigeonstar described the three, Antstar watched the young cat and her mentor. Whisperpaw was small and excitable, taking in every detail around her and excitedly chattering with her mentor, Honeyfur. Honeyfur had always been a cat with a quiet melancholy nobody could truly describe, but he looked much more lighthearted than usual as his young apprentice skipped and sang and danced around him.

“She’s a force of nature,” the golden tabby explained to Pebblesky and Addertooth. “Not nearly as quiet as her name would make you think!”

Marblepaw watched Whisperpaw with a strange sort of envy. Antstar thought about how he had never seen her laugh and smile like Whisperpaw did. Even as a kit in the nursery, she and her brother Twigpaw were always quite sullen- because of the high likelihood they were the result of illegitimacy, as well as them both being unplanned to begin with, their mother Adderthorn was always cold and distant towards them. She really hadn’t meant to, of course, and she did love them in her own strange way. But she never seemed entirely sure what to do with them, and often she’d spend as much time away from the nursery as possible as she figured it would be better to just not be around than make mistakes. Antstar did remember Marblepaw was happy the day she was apprenticed- but ever since then, ever since she had known the truth of what Whitetooth was willing to do to help their Clan, she had remained still and scared.

Antstar wanted to help her, with every bone in his body. But he knew what would have to be revealed to do so- and he didn’t have the stomach to entertain the idea further.

But he couldn’t linger on the thought longer. Currantstar was taking the stand- and, if anything else, Antstar knew it would be interesting.

The secret of Currantstar’s infidelity had begun to get around, as Whitestone had told ShadowClan about it when he resigned as Currantstar’s deputy. Apparently, this hadn’t been the first time something similar had happened- but the last time, at least, he had no current mate and was merely ShadowClan’s deputy. Specklestar, the prior leader who he had served under, excused him- and privately arranged for the kits that resulted from the relationship to live with their rogue mother and never see the Clans. But now, he had nobody to defend him and hold his paw, and he looked rather like a lost kit. He had aged twelve moons since Antstar had seen him- like a paper structure crumbling under light rain.

“ShadowClan… ShadowClan mourns the loss of our friends from other Clans who passed on in the great Sunningrocks battle. We wish them good hunting in StarClan.”

“Are you gonna mention your kittypet girl?” cackled an old, battle-scarred elder just below him.

Currantstar pretended not to hear. “Over the last moon, Whitestone, my previous deputy, resigned. I have elected former leading permaqueen Gullflight in his place.” That made sense, Antstar thought- he and Gullflight had always been good friends. He recalled something that Shalestar had told him many moons ago before leadership was among even Antstar’s wildest of dreams: A leader’s leadership is truly over when they stop electing deputies that could lead the Clan, and start electing deputies that exist solely to protect and be friends with them.

There was more jeering from the crowd, and Antstar noted that the jeering seemed to bring Pigeonstar some strange sort of enjoyment. Currantstar cleared his throat, his breath suddenly getting shaky. “My… former deputy… asked me to tell the other Clans why he resigned, else he would tell them himself. My deputy-“ -he sped up the words to get them out quick, like ripping off a bandage- “my deputy chose to resign because he walked in on me with a kittypet mate.”

“That’s not all!” yelled a calico molly behind him. “She’s gonna have Currantstar’s babies!”

Pandemonium ensued among the Clans below. There was confusion, betrayal, and a joyous sort of lampooning. ShadowClan cats immediately went off on the allegations: The elders were gossiping about how Currantstar was likely seeing more mollies than just the kittypet he had disclosed, a black tom with scratched-out eyes was excitedly telling Smokebark of RiverClan about how Currantstar had only elected Whitestone as deputy to win favors with his daughter, three ThunderClan mollies were wondering how poor Sleekpetal, Currantstar’s mate, who hadn’t been to the Gathering that day was taking the news…

It was chaos. Only Tatteredstar bellowing “SILENCE!” was enough to get the Clans calm down from the sheer drama of it all- but before the silence truly died out, Antstar heard Spiderfoot over the crowd saying “Well, he should resign, shouldn’t he?”

“Because of this,” Currantstar continued, “I shall be placing myself in self-imposed exile for half a moon, during which I shall hunt for the Clan and the Clan only. Then I will return. In my absence, Gullflight will lead and provide me information about how the Clan is doing.

Fair punishment, if a little short, Antstar reasoned. Then it hit him- Currantstar was probably leaving to go be with Calypso further!

Oh, Stoatslink would have loved this, he thought - but then the guilt washed all over him again.

If nothing else, Antstar thought, it would prove to be a very interesting moon.

The Gathering soon dismissed- ShadowClan first, as they wanted to high-tail it after all of the embarrassment they had suffered on Currantstar’s behalf; then RiverClan, then SkyClan, until finally only ThunderClan and WindClan were left, gathering up their respective cats. Not a word was spoken between Antstar and Tatteredstar, although she did give him a nod of acknowledgement as did he to her. Tatteredstar, Antstar felt, was on another dimension than all the other leaders. She wasn’t just leader of ThunderClan- she was ThunderClan. It was as if the Clan itself could not exist without her- although Antstar did wonder how immortal she truly was, as every moon he had noticed Eelwhisker, her deputy, take more and more of an active role. Was he preparing himself for something more?

No, Antstar thought- no, he couldn’t be. There were two things Antstar was certain would live to the end of the universe- the stars above him, and Tatteredstar.

“Can we talk for a minute?” Antstar watched as a blue-gray-and-white tom approached Tatteredstar, his tail flicking. The WindClan leader recognized him as Cloudclaw, Pebblesky’s son from before she moved to be a RiverClan medic; he always seemed unpleased about something.

“Shoot,” said Tatteredstar gruffly as she organized the ThunderClan elders into a group.

“My new apprentice, Firepaw,” Cloudclaw began, “hasn’t been doing any of his assignments recently ever since he was reassigned to me after the battle. He’s constantly scared of everything, always going on and on about the battle we had earlier and all the blood spilled. I really want what’s best for the lad, I really do; I'm tough on him because I want him to succeed. I worry about his future in the Clan if he goes on like this.”

Tatteredstar nodded. “I’ve noticed. It seems to me the poor fellow’s got war-eyes.”

War-eyes? Antstar thought. He had heard the phrase once or twice in passing, but he had never known what it referred to.

“War-eyes,” Tatteredstar began to explain, “is something that can happen to anyone. Doesn’t happen always in battle either, but it happens there more often than not. You see something that terrifies you, it claws at your mind a certain way… only StarClan knows what and what doesn’t give you war-eyes. Once you got war-eyes, you have to live with it. The slightest things make you jump and re-remember it. It doesn’t leave your mind. Eventually you learn to work around it, and it loosens its grip on you. But sometimes it comes back in waves. My brother- he died many seasons before you were born, of course- had war-eyes. Never quite left him.”

Antstar- or anyone else, really- had never heard Tatteredstar mention her family before. They were all long dead, after all- she was the only one left from her entire generation, born about some seventy moons ago.

But he knew he had heard that description before. Coalclaw, he thought- of course! Whatever Firepaw of ThunderClan was suffering, Coalclaw had to have had it too. He made a mental note- next time he saw Tatteredstar, he’d ask her about it, and, hopefully, he would know what to do with the haunted WindClan tom at last.

Home was quiet that night, at least.

Stoatslink had been buried for a solid quarter-moon or so now, and so the Clan no longer held the sort of paranoia it had the first couple of days after his body had been found. It had brought them all together, at least- just as Whitetooth said it would. The excitement of the Gathering wasn’t fully removed, as the story of what. Currantstar had been up to spread across camp the way thistles spread across the summer grass.

Antstar told Spiderfoot, Shadeflower and Sparrowpetal about what he had learned from overhearing Tatteredstar- about war-eyes, and how it was likely what Coalclaw was dealing with. Shadeflower and Sparrowpetal looked relieved that there was a term for it, but Spiderfoot was still adamant- if there was a treatment, she reasoned, Coalclaw should have already done the research himself to figure it out and work through it. She said she bore no hard feelings, and truly didn’t want to be the villain; she simply worried about the Clan and the greater good, and if Coalclaw would impede them all. So Antstar took a long night walk with her, over the moors and the plains, they reminisced about the past when Spiderfoot was still just a newly-appointed apprentice and how much she had learned. She’d be a good deputy, Antstar thought, if he ever had to elect a new one and if time lengthened her patience. Antstar reminded her how important her family was- and how she should be kinder to her brother, as Antstar himself wished for a family more than anything in the world.

“But you have your Clan!” Spiderfoot told him. “You have us, we can be your family!”

If only she knew, Antstar thought to himself as the moon, pale as Stoatslink’s fur, stared down at him.

If only she knew.

#evening ish? rb

35 notes · View notes