I have lost my body. I will not lose my honor. Through every death comes honor; with honor, redemption. [ Independent. Private. Selective. Written by Walden. ]
sibling relationships are so strange... like i love you. you will never understand me in a way that matters. we are the same person in drastically different ways. we are sewn together. we don't talk. we are attached at the hip. you wish i was never born. can i call you. let's eat together. i forgive you. etc
[ @otoutogoroshi, continued two months later from here ]
"i will not be swayed."
genji might have found a place to belong in overwatch, but there is a debt that comes with having your life saved that hanzo cannot argue against. it's not his place to tell his brother how to repay it; the same hand that struck him with the sword cannot be the same hand that heals. his brother is persistent, though—this isn't the first time he's mentioned overwatch, but hanzo's tolerance to the idea has budged none.
there's a surrender to dedicating one's self to an organization that he's sworn himself to never do again. he may no longer be shimada hanzo, hier of the shimada clan, but at least he's shimada hanzo... whatever he decides that may be.
his frown deepens as he glares off to the side—even after all this time, disagreeing comes easy.
( it's only looking at genji that he finds hard; it's still not anyone he recognizes. )
"we were never destined to be on the same path."
He bites back a rather sharp remark he knows he shouldn't make at Hanzo's last statement.
Forgiveness has come easier to him in the past few years.
[ It's only the remembering not to fall into old habits that he finds hard; blades are not the only things that can wound to the core. ]
"Perhaps not," Genji allows after a moment.
Agreement, patience, and perseverance have come easier to him since training with his master.
[ It's only the pointed and deliberate avoidance that he finds hard; how difficult it is to remain a ghost while still living. ]
"But, that our paths are not the same does not mean they must entirely diverge. I understand, Hanzo, why you would choose not to join Overwatch. Whatever path you may choose, all I ask of you is that you…"
He hesitates, vocalizer faltering with his courage.
Speaking to him has come easier the longer he has done so.
[ It's only the vulnerability that he finds hard; it is terrifying to know that it might be met with scorn, with rejection. ]
When next he speaks, his voice is quieter, almost lost even to the stillness of the calm, clear night.
"… All I ask of you is that you do not leave me behind again… I have… missed you, Brother."
Genji may have accepted who he is now, though it is somewhat begrudgingly done out of necessity. He is not entirely comfortable with himself, however, until he's dyeing his hair crazy colors again.
He stopped because it was Silly and Childish, in the immediate aftermath of the fight with Hanzo. It seemed stupid and pointless. Why bother with such trivialities?
He hasn't resumed because There's already enough reason for people to stare. Before the bright colors were both because he enjoyed them and for the Attention.
The day Genji walks out into the base and his hair is candy apple green again—or electric blue—everyone will know that he is finally 100% at peace with himself again. Because it isn't silly or pointless if he enjoys it. And what does it matter if people stare when he has not only accepted but is finally, truly comfortable with himself?
“My burdens are my own to bear, as they have always been, and my path is mine alone to tread! They are of no consequence to you!” the elder shouts at last, pushing to his feet from where he had sat on the floor and turning to stare down [ the ghost of ] the younger with fire in his eyes, shoulders squared and fists clenched.
Yet, just as an explosion––sudden, loud, and heedless of the damage it could cause––his anger dissipates almost in an instant and seems to drift away from him, as though carried away like smoke on the wind.
“… You have never understood my burdens. Not when we were children and not now,” he answers, his tone almost that of lament, and yet, in truth, had he ever wished for him to do so? Had he ever wished that his brother understood the differences in how they were raised? The differences in what was expected of them?
Genji received freedom, to do and be as he pleased.
He was not allowed the same.
“… Even as you have changed, still you never will…”
[ How does one forgive what is unforgivable? How does one pardon such transgressions as his own? A still and broken body lies on the ground belonging to one he once watched over and protected––and he is the reason for such a terrible state. Shaking hands cast down bloodied sword in a moment of weakness––too late to have saved him yet unable to strike the last blow, even were it to be a mercy that would have ended his suffering. Unsteady legs walk–– stumble–– run away from that place, from such a terrible deed, unable even to remain with him through what should have been his last moments that he would not suffer alone. ]
Coward. How many ways he had failed him.
[ And yet still, here stands the shadow of who had once been his brother––still is his brother?–– wishing him to forgive himself. Asking why he cannot. ]
He turns away then, no longer able to face him. His posture remains unchanged but the tension is gone, carried away after the anger. A bowstring no longer held taut.
[ He is tired. He is so very tired. ]
“… You waste your time with me, Genji… I have no answers to give you…”
short tut sounded between them, genji's arms crossed over his chest, covering the symbol that read warrior. hanzo remained so similar to his younger years, it seemed, even today. even in that moment, he truly did feel like the youngest with no understanding of the eldest's trials. yet, he spoke, sure of his words, despite. ❝ until i receive an answer i believe to be true. ❞ he answered as though it were simple.
❝ there is still something holds you back from your own forgiveness. ❞ he claimed in confidence, dropping his arms down to his sides, one hand gestured towards his brother. ❝ if it is not my own that relives your burdens, brother- ❞ the two had been down this path before, genji's promise of reconciliation, leaving the past where it lay. perhaps he wouldn't stop until he knew what exactly stood in his brother's way. he asked again. ❝ what will? ❞
@ataleoftwodragons : what answer will make you stop asking ? Hanzo for Genji
This for all multi muses or really anyone with more than one muse even if they’re on a different blog! Have your muses dish the dirt about each other.
Send 💘 for Muse A to talk about Muse’s B love life (or lack of one)
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Send ⏪ for Muse A to comment on Muse B’s past/backstory
Send ⏩ for Muse B to predict what they think Muse B’s future will be like
Send 🍇 for Muse A to comment on Muse B’s eating habit (favorite food, least favorite, eating etiquette, ect)
Send 👍 for something Muse A likes about Muse B
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“I can’t imagine what it’s like for you. I just can’t imagine how hard it must be.”
@watchiingover
The [ temporary ] loss of the visor as Winston works on it for repairs is never so keenly felt as now, when he feels her eyes on him and when she speaks.
Angela has knows the entirety of his injuries, had seen them––she was the one who had made him survive them, however angry he had been about that at the time and the one who had patched him up countless times since––and yet, he feels no less exposed now, even with only his visor missing from his [ armor ] suit.
[ Perhaps he is not so at peace with himself as he had thought. ]
“… There are days that are more difficult than others…” he admits after a moment, his voice quiet, almost lost even in the [ relative ] hush of the lab. “… but those days are fewer now than they were then… I hope that one day, they will be fewer still.”