Hello, today is my birthday, and I would like to share a comic I made in the last year with you. It's called Broomistega and Thrinaxodon.

This comic was originally printed with yellow, fluorescent pink, light teal, and violet risograph inks. Physical copies are available in my shop.

yeah no thanks

I don’t think asking an program that also doesn’t know French would help

Your knees are on layaway and you are not going to make the next payment

List of unusual and concerning threats

(Feel free to reblog and add to the list)

I will rearrange your bones in alphabetical order

I will scoop out your kneecaps with an ice cream scoop

I will end your lineage / Your bloodline ends with you

I will make your skin vanish

I wish I had the energy to cook more but I can

I'm curious. Reblog this if you know how to cook

I don’t even care if it’s macaroni, ramen or those little bowls you stick in the microwave. Please, I need reassurance that most of the population on tumblr WOULDN’T STARVE TO DEATH if their parents couldn’t fix them food or they couldn’t go out to eat. 

lesbians: hi please don't call us all terfs. terfs have already claimed in the past that lesbian = terf + terf = lesbian. trans, nb, + ally lesbians do exist, + by being "scared of lesbians" bc you think we're all terfs you're being lesophobic.

ppl on this site: hhh i saw the lesbian flag + almost blocked op bc they could be a terf bc they're lesbian! lesbians are scary bc they're all secretly terfs. :) i saw a lesbian make a post abt lesbianism + despite there being no evidence or dogwhistles i think op could be a terf for being a lesbian. trans + nb lesbians what are those. :)

I need you people to try this game- it's an open-source survival sci-fi traditional roguelike called Cataclysm Bright Nights. It's a fork based off of Cataclysm Dark Days Ahead, but designed to be more focused on fun than punishing realism- though it's still plenty realistic, at least given what kind of game it is.

For those who don't know, Cataclysm is an old game, from 2010, that has been developed over time and has since forked off into two competing versions. You play as the survivor of the Cataclysm, and now have to figure out how to keep surviving in the face of an ever-evolving threat.

Grab the game from the release section of the github; the game's full description (and my gushing) is below the cut.

You may be asking, "that description is kind of vague, what exactly was this apocalypse?", well the answer is all of them. Every single human is infected with a parasitic interdimensional organism known as The Blob, which mutates its host in response to certain things. Every living human, and many animals, that dies will come back as a zombie, and the longer the Cataclysm goes on, the more the zombies and wildlife will mutate further. There are also crazed humans who fight alongside the undead, bandits, alien invaders known as Mi-Go, demons rising from the netherrealms, hostile military robots and cyborgs and turrets dot the landscape, and there's even a fungal hive mind trying to infect all other life out of a twisted benevolence.

The game also has one of the most indepth crafting systems I've ever seen. Instead of simply being able to build with a workbench or your bare hands, most crafting recipes require the proper tools- and if you don't have them, you can make some. Pick some flowers to turn their stems into cordage, grab some rocks, and make a stone hammer and knife; build a basic screwdriver out of scrap metal and wood, and a makeshift crowbar out of a pipe you flattened on one end. Carve a wooden or bone needle and learn to sew a gambeson. Disassemble a lawnmower and tie the blade to a long stick to make a makeshift polearm. Construct a full forging setup and make yourself a sword and metal armor. Add an electric motor and a motorcycle battery to a bicycle to make it run that much faster. Take the turret mount off of a firetruck, weld it to the hood of the car you stole, and install a handmade laser rifle you built from disassembled electronics and camera lenses to run off of the car's battery, allowing you to gun down the undead hordes in relative safety. Disassemble .308 ammo to hand-load the spent 5.56 shells you used gunning down enemies. Delve into ruined laboratories whose experiments have run amok to find high-tech weapons and learn to craft your own targeted mutagens.

You can also learn martial arts, strengthening your abilities with melee weapons. Everyone learns basic brawling once they know how to hit something, but brawling takes higher skill to gain the basic techniques; proper fighting styles have to be carefully found, but are worth it. Use Eskrima and an extendable baton or a dagger to smack and dice your enemies apart, use fencing to effortlessly parry enemy attacks with a rapier, use ninjutsu to silently take down foes, learn drunken boxing to sway and counterattack every single enemy blow, or even learn biojutsu to slice your enemies apart with implanted metal claws or blades.

The game is also unique in that it lets you use mutations and cybernetics hand in hand. You mutating a pair of venomous fangs doesn't stop you from installing smoke and poison resistant cybernetic lungs, you mutating hooves doesn't stop you from installing high-tech alloy plating onto your legs. And you can loot cybernetics from hospitals and augmentation clinics and labs, but you can also dissect zombies for them, using your first aid skill to carefully extract bionics from the undead- you can even build a handheld device to identify bionics in corpses. Generally, mutations are less reliable but cost hunger at most, while cybernetics are more reliable but harder to power and gain.

All in all, it's one of the best roguelikes I've ever played. There's so much to it, there's daily updates, grab the Catapult launcher to try all four forks, just try it out! There's a discord server linked in the github!

oh are my toasted screws done?

My new toaster was rattling, so I turned it upside down and shook it, and a screw fell out – which is concerning.

Upon examination, however, I can’t see any holes with missing screws, and in fact, it looks like the screw that fell out of it is a completely different kind of screw from the ones that were actually used in the toaster’s assembly.

I’m not sure whether that’s less concerning, or more.

Woe ham be upon you

I just got another one of those phishing emails where it pretends to be a confirmation of a subscription you never signed up for and tries to trick you into providing personally identifying information for "confirmation purposes" when you attempt to cancel, but:

a. this one is for a weekly grocery delivery service, of all things; and

b. the fake shopping list contains nothing but ham.

I have been fraudulently subscribed to ham.

Where’s Gandalf you coward

[Un]conscionably, Tolkien's works have been severely underrepresented in the world of Tumblr sexymen. Now is[n't] the time to change that.

On a related note, did you know there is a Sexypedia Wiki? The research I do for these polls continues to surprise.

[Un]conscionably, Tolkien's works have been severely underrepresented in the world of Tumblr sexymen. Now is[n't] the time to change that.

On a related note, did you know there is a Sexypedia Wiki? The research I do for these polls continues to surprise.

I’m so bad at that game I’m not even sure where you would find flesh raptors

What if you

Wanted to have fun playing CDDA

But CDDA said

| | | | | Flesh Raptor

Hostile!

Can see your current location!

also you can do a space horror thing with winter horror where there's a danger but we have to stay close to it because its in the thing we need to not die (compare alien to the thing)

spring horror is good because of the symbolism of death and rebirth and storms and everything being vibrant but still cold. and summer horror is good because sweltering heat and insects and long days. and fall horror is good because halloween and death and scary movies. and winter horror is good because snow contrasting with blood and freezing temperatures and long nights. btw.

Lil Nas X did a cover of Jolene and Dolly Parton responded to it on twitter

Image descriptions under the cut

[ID: Screenshots of two tweets. The first one is by Dolly Parton and it says "I was so excited when someone told me that Lil Nas X had done my song #Jolene. I had to find it and listen to it immediately…and it's really good. Of course, I love him anyway. I was surprised and I'm honored and flattered. I hope he does good for both of us. Thank you @LilNasX". The second tweet is Lil Nas X responding to the Dolly Parton tweet by simply saying "HOLY SHIT" in all caps. End of ID.]

I keep quoting “my acocunt” for several months and I just realized it’s from my own screenshot and not a popular post

oh bugger theres not much time quick everyone reblog

god I fucking love strawberries

so since deviantart is getting shitty anyone have a suggestion for where to find transformation art?

no because they are ace