Valentines day. Just how desperate are you?

It is ordinary run-of-the-mill Saturday night (the Saturday before the Valentine’s Day). A friend and I are sitting in nice low key restaurant cum cafe in a nice part of the town. As we are laughing and enjoying our milkshakes a guy comes up to us; he is sort of nice looking (okay I admit it, he was very cute).

Guy: Let me tell you ladies are gorgeous.

Me: umm ok.

*My friend and I share a look that says we look like hell and we know it.

Guy: So are guys in LUMS? LSE? Where are u guys studying?

Me: I am not studying at the moment and I don’t think she want to tell you where she is studying.

Guy: Are u guys even from this country

Me: umm yeah

Guy: Well you sound foreign 

Me: Was that supposed to be compliment?

Guy: Well, yeah. Yes it was supposed to be compliment. Are u in A-levels? (A- levels is equivalent of High school)

*My friend and I look at each other

Guy: I am asking because I am.

Me: Um. Listen. We are about 5 years older than you are so scoot!

  What happened next is that basically he ran for his life.

  What’s the point of this story you say?

The point is to demonstrate just how desperate people tend to get around Valentine’s Day. They try to hit on every member of the opposite sex that they see, not caring who they are, how old they are, what they look like and other usual things one takes into consideration, hoping against the hope that they wouldn’t have to spend the dreaded day of the year alone.

Thank God, Valentine’s Day 2012 has passed but for the next year if you find yourself single in this auspicious month of February, try not to make a fool of yourself. Instead I suggest that you recruit some single friends go out, have fun and simply forget what day of the year it is. 

Ghulabi Gang :)

So I just hear about this organization of women called Ghulabi Gang (i.e. Pink Gang) Fun name huh?

Anyway it is a women-only organization in Bundelkhand, Uttar Pradhesh. Ghulabi Gang which is reported to have more than 20,000 members fights for a number of causes such marital abuse. In the part of world where marital rape is not considered rape at all, it is applaudable that these women have taken a step towards bringing issues such as child marriages, forced dowry and female illiteracy to the main page. 

Nation of perverts or Land of Pure?

I bought this book merely book Muhammad Hanif (the author) wrote one of my all time favourites -The Case of Exploding Mangoes. I had prepared myself to be dissapointed but surprisingly I not only enjoyed this book I found it damm right hard to put the book down for food and bathroom breaks. 

I like this book because it highlights the political, social and cultural issues in Pakistan by weaving them around the lives of his characters. There are few parts in the book which disturbed me. However, the truth of the matter is such events however abhorrent they may be are a part and parcel of the lives of many people in Pakistan.

Alice the protagonist is a 'low-cast' catholic nurse in Karachi. She is shown as a fearless young woman who when forced to perform oral sex at gunpoint takes a razor to her attacher’s penis. At different parts in the book she is spat at, subjected to lewd gestures and unwarranted hands on her bosom. The author manages to create a hauntingly accurate picture of the 'nation of perverts'.

I recommend this book whole heartedly to anyone who is looking to know more about culture and society of today’s ‘Land of Pure.’

  -WM

IDIOTS!

Women suck at Math...what????

When I first saw this I thought it was a really tasteless American ad and that it highlighted racist stereotypes against African Americans. However I was surprised that this is actually an INDIAN ad. Ok, I'm not completely surprised because there are lots of tasteless ads in India (my favorite are usually the Fair and Lovely ones). Anyways, I dare you to tell me that your reaction wasn't WTF when you saw this. 

BOL

I just saw the trailer for this new movie being released this week:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CS6E2wORinw

Bol highlights women's rights (or lack there of) in Pakistan. Its a movie, I believe that every South Asian Woman can connect to.

Its really a pity that the movie is not available in English (so far). 

Anyway here is a blog I found on tribune's website that talks about the movie:

http://blogs.tribune.com.pk/story/6540/bol-speaking-silence/

"Why are black women less attractive?" wtf

I mean wtf??? Really! What a racist thing to say?  And thats not all, according to Kanazawa (the writer)it is only black woman women who are less attractive NOT the men....I hate to repeat myself but really wtf????

Love your curves girls!

Afterall as Mae West said a curve is  the loveliest distance between two points. 

This video is an excerpt from an upcoming documentary called  "Dark Girls". This video talks about the experiences of dark skinned black women, and gives the viewer an emotional insight into the difficulties these women faced from society both during their childhood and adulthood. I wanted to share this because South Asia, as well as other areas of the world, have similar  views on dark skin (think of Fair and Lovely). It's sad that so many people around the world have this distorted view that dark skin means ugly skin or exotic skin. 

FZQ

I got this from CBS (click on the title), but there are lots of sources that are talking about how a study showed that White people think there is more racism against them then there is against Black people. Compared to the amount of Black people, more White people think that racism against Black people has decreased drastically since the 1950's.... I want to know about the background of these people (men/women, where they live, political views, age, etc) and what makes them think this. Is it because of Affirmative Action? Is it because we have a President who is of color? 

FZQ

Indian Memsahib, Social Prejudices and Men!

Recently I read this book by Suchita Malik - Indian Memsahib. Although marketed as fiction it is in fact part autobiographical – a big part.  Indian Memsahib is story of Sunaina, an educated city girl from a middle-class family who then goes on to become abureaucrat’s wife.   

Average at best, this book is easy to read and interesting enough to keep you engaged till the very end. However, throughout the book I kept waiting for ‘the moment’-the climax of the story to discover that I had finished the entire book without coming across one.  The writing style is nothing special in fact I found it to be quite amateurish (not that I am saying I write any better, but then again I am not in the business of writing books; if was I would probably try to distinguish my writing style from that of a typical 10th grader). Anyway moving on I am not saying the book is bad (I mean I did read the entire thing didn’t I?)  I am just saying that there isn’t very much in the book that is truly unique. So why am I writing about this book?

Because first quarter of this book very good throughout which I couldn’t help but compare myself with the protagonist. She is a modern educated girl who has led a sheltered life up until she embarks upon her career. There is however one a line from the book that has really stuck with me, “Her modern looks and loud manners made her an interesting object of scrutiny” (Malik, 2009).  This line in itself sums up my experience at work place in Pakistan. Belonging to well-to-do family I went to private school where all my classmates were of the similar background and then I went aboard to study. When I came back here to work my world just blew up-big time. I met all kinds of people from all walks of life at my work place. After initial glitches at work I settled in and just when I thought I was starting to get a grip over the office politics, the drama and the inside stories, the summer came around.  With summer came my summer wardrobe. The first time I wore an off-sleeve Shalwar Kameez to work, the traffic in the Finance Department (which is where I work) increased many folds- since then I have discovered that my modern dressing coupled with my Amreeki background has generated a lot of interest and theories about my character.  The thing is judging people based on their appearance is not unique to my work place or my country. While I was in the States, I felt people would  judge me based on my accent and the color of my skin, many felt that they had speak slowly (painfully so) or explain in greater details since I was this poor brown girl from a third-world country who knew nothing about the English language or the American way of life.

In short: there will always be people who will judge you based on superficial things. I know that and I have accepted it. However there is a part of me that hopes that somewhere out there is a guy for me who doesn’t care about these things. Furthermore, borrowing from Malik this guy would be a lot like TCG in his choice of women:

“He liked what he would refer to as ‘interesting’ women, not homely, shy, demure variety but gutsy women, with a streak of independence and kink, who were able to stimulate his mind with their voluptuousness. Independent women with minds and careers of their own fascinated him…” (Malik, 2009)

                                                                                                                           by Wajeeha Mohsin

We (women) are strong, we just don't know it !(by WM)

My dad told me a story about his friend who was stationed as a police officer in rural Sindh (which is a province in Pakistan). One day as this police officer was patrolling his area he saw a well-dressed man walking down the dirt road.  He looked well fed and was smoking an expensive brand of cigarettes. Trailing few feet behind the man was his wife, who despite being about six months pregnant looked severely malnourished. The woman held on to a little boy and had several kilos worth of wood balanced on top of her head.  Despite the hot summer sun above, she wore ragged clothes and no shoes. The police officer who couldn’t stand the injustice of it all decided to teach the man a lesson. He took out a pile of laundry from his car and tied it to the man’s stomach; he then took the pile of the wood from the woman and put it on the man’s head. He further ordered the man to take off his shoes, hold on to the little boy and then carry on his journey.  The man barely took a couple of steps before he collapsed!

Moral of the Story:  We may look fragile, we may feel soft and sweet, but we are strong - so strong that sometimes even we don't know the how strong we can be. So to all my female friends believe in yourself and your strengths; we can achieve anything (or anyone) we want!

No one will ever create a bolder vision of your life than you are able to envision for yourself

What's Holding You Back? 8 Critical Choices for Women's Success - Linda Austin

us: (Fatima, Sweda & Wajeeha)

Not gonna lie, I wish this was real. Bonus points for the song choice = )