agonyarrows
Revenge is at the tip of my arrow
An ask/roleplay blog for Varus from League of Legends™ Text replies only.
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"They express regret, a plea for forgiveness. Not the most gracious of gifts... but I thought they'd fit," said Varus, turning his head towards Syndra. Fainly smiling he added, "I'll be sure to bring different ones next time". His face turns to a cheerless expression once again, he softly grabs Syndra by the shoulder and looks deep into her eyes.
"Even if you don't think so... I'm still responsible. Everywhere I went I just ended up hurting more and more people. This isn't the first time someone ended up like this because of me but... I'll make sure it's the last one. No more hurting, no more innocent deaths. You showed me there's a different path I can take... and I think this is a good first step on it"
Letting go of the flowers in his hand, Varus extends his other arm to embrace Syndra behind her back. Hugging her softly, as not to injure her any further. Tears gather at his eyes and he speaks to her, a bit quieter than before, with gratitude and gentleness in his voice. "Thank you," he says, "I was lost and you helped me find myself. If there's anything... a word is all I need to help you back. Now and forever, I'll be there for you."
The Ties That Bind (Closed RP)
Syndra lowers her head, hearing how his voice trembles when he talks about the sacrifice for the seal, and then how he collapses down to the floor near the wall. She bites her lip, leaving a mark of the red lipstick on her teeth.
“No. You… You did all you could," she says, and pauses for a moment. Hesitantly, leaning on her arms - which still aren’t fully responsive - she tries to stand up and catch her balance. She doesn’t want to risk using her power to float, not just yet, and not in Varus’ presence. The cold touch of the floor is refreshing to her bare feet, after a couple of days spent almost entirely in bed.
Her steps are wobbly and uncertain, but she manages to make a few, only her strentched out arms preventing her from walking into the chair next to the bed. Finally, she grabs a hold of the wall, and vaguely walks into Varus’ direction.
“Varus," she begins, but more for him to move or make a sound, so she could locate him better. "It was me who… who…" her voice breaks, "… lost control. I thought… I could free you of it. I only made a bigger mess… and caused you a loss.”
She sighs, and also slides down against the wall. It’s uneven and rugged, just like her thoughts that moment. Her gloved hand lands on the tulips.
“I bet they’re pretty," she mumbles. "Nobody ever got me flowers.”
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Varus straightened himelf and pointed one of his hands towards the crystal strapped to his chest.
"Back when I began my duty, the monks taught me a temporary seal of alike the one they used to seal the pit. Of course, theirs didn't actually seal it, just limited its power without a suitable catalyst. It really was just a simple dispersal of power over an area. Their seal denied it a catalyst... mine guides it into a concentrated form for easier containment. Once the Pallas jumped on you, an amount of it escaped ... and judging by the crack left in my crystal it's still insde you. To be honest, it doesn't listen to me as much as it used to anymore but I don't see it as a problem as of now."
He wants to tell her not to worry, to smile, if just for a second. But he himself can't seem to do so.
"It wasn't really my doing though, the seal I mean. As much as I hate to admit it, The Owl's power took major part, I was merely a tool for it. Either way, what's done is done but...I don't think I'll ever be able to do it again. I sacrificed something for it. Something one of a kind. That's why I can't let it get out. Not again."
Varus puts his back against a wall and slowly slides down until he sits on the ground. Putting the flowers down beside him, he looks at Syndra.
"I'm sorry",he says again, "I'm a faulire as a guardian."
The Ties That Bind (Closed RP)
"I was the one who brough peril upon myself… not only myself, but also you. I do not know what would’ve happened if you hadn’t reacted fast enough…" Syndra finds herself sighing, a sound she rarely made. This man actually… cares for her well being. Not like Duchess, worried about a lost Ionian child, not like Summoners sometimes, worried about the power that could leak through their fingers.
Worried about her, and her suffering, and her troubles.
But apologising didn’t come easily through her throat.
Instead, she changes the topic.
“How did you … how did you seal something as powerful?”
#>> yeah let's roll with this>>#>>now if you'll excuse me I got a promo to play so brb for 3-5 matches>>
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He didn't understand at first. "Owe you my life" seemed weird to him. After all, he was the reason she had found herself in such peril. All that pain she had to go through, it all happened because of him. Yet, there she was, not angry at him, but welcoming. He walked into the room and closed the door behind him.
"There's a few things I wanted to talk about again. I gave our conversation some thought and decided upon something but first of all" , Varus made a quick pause, and revealed the bouquet he'd been hiding behind his back to Syndra. "I got you these flowers. I wanted to say I'm sorry without actually having to say it but... I couldn't bring myself to take the coward's way out of the situation. I brought the pain upon you, made you suffer more than anyone should and for that I am really sorry. I got you involved in matters I shouldn't have, and it backfired onto both of us. So, please. Forgive me, Syndra."
He never knew how to properly say sorry, always overdid it, even if it was something trivial. But this time, it wasn't. He wanted to pour his whole heart out, to tell her that he's there to support her if she ever runs into trouble, more so if it was his fault, but this time he feared he had not said enough. Varus sighed deeply and awaited an answer, hoping it's an approving one.
The Ties That Bind (Closed RP)
Her immensed in her thoughts so much she didn’t even hear anyone approaching the door, Varus’ voice caught Syndra completely unprepared. In shock she jumps a bit on the bed, in one swift motion puling the hood deep over her face. Her hands tremble, the flames on her arms suddenly burning even more, as if sensing the proximity of the other half.
“Yes. Come in," she says hesitantly, turning her back to the door, as if she didn’t want to face Varus. Then, she reconsiders, and boldly faces the entrance.
She had been thinking about the moment they’re going to meet again after all this. Was he mad at her? Was he also hurt? She failed to do what she wanted, to clean him of his taint… Was he disappointed? Or was he thankful at least half of it was off his mind? … was it really? Did he feel the remants of the energy just like she did?
There were so many questions.
“Come in, Varus. I owe you my life… I will never close my doors for you.”
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The Ties That Bind (Closed RP)
His encounter with Syndra left Varus weakened. He had been avoiding contact and strain for a while but his body was not the problem. It was his mind that was troubling him. He's been wondering around the Institute, waiting to hear anything about the one he brought misfortune upon the last time they had met. "Syndra", the name tormented Varus since he left her in the Summoners' care. He wondered if she hates him, if she would rather not see him again after what he's done. Each moment he spent thinking brought only more uncertainty to his mind.
And so, Varus decided to act. He was not fluent in flower language, nor did he want to involve anyone else in his matters, yet he remembered one thing that his wife taught him. White is the pure colour, it means no evil intent and that was exactly what he wanted to say. "I don't mean harm this time. I am sorry" was the message he had decided upon. He bought a bouquet of white tulips and headed for the Institute's Infirmary. Someone had just left Syndra's room and left the door slightly open. She was sitting on top of a clinic bed, her stare fixed at a direction Varus couldn't quite pinpoint. He knocked on the door softly and gripped the bouquet tightly behind his back.
He froze for a moment, not knowing what to say anymore, all he had planned has left his mind. "Sorry, may I enter?" he asked, taking a step away from the door. "Now all is up to her," he thought awaiting Syndra's answer.
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Still exhausted by the time his seal took effect, Varus can't bring himself to look up to check what happened. Breathing heavily, he screams out to Syndra. "Did it work? Syndra? COME ON, ANSWER ME!". "No," he thinks to himself ", this can't be happening, not again". He hears a thud and another one shortly after. "No, please no. Let her be safe". He wants to believe everything turned out just fine, that just this once, everyone gets to survive. He finally looks up only to see Syndra lying face-down on the ground. Varus can barely walk, but he stands up and at a crawl-like pace takes slow steps towards her.
"Come on, this can't be real," he says, not wanting to believe what he sees.
"You can't give up yet," once more, he calls out to her expecting the situation to change.
"You have so much left to live for! Why stop living now? You've been through all that, rejection, fear, sadness, anger, pain. And what for? To just give up? Wake up damn it!"
Varus kneels in front of her, turning her over to her back. Slowly shaking her, he whispers under his breath. "Please, wake up. I beg of you. Don't do this to me, this world needs you more than it needs a revenge-driven madman. Open your eyes, please."
He looks around to see if anybody is there to help them, but there is not a soul in sight. The display of power was sure to draw a summoner to come and check, at least that's what he believes happened. He tries to pick her up to carry her just long enough so she can get aid, but falls over. He tries again. His arms are weak and his knees are giving up, but this time he manages to do it.
Varus, carrying Syndra, walks out of the garden into the halls and stumbles upon a summoner leaving the Institute who, upon seeing the state they're in, immediately teleports both of them to the infirmary.
Inner Demons
She expected pain, and a lot of it. The purple taint couldn’t come without a price, especially when taken by force. She expected to have to endure whispers of temptation and rage, and demands of imminent destruction. And then - an arrow to the heart, most probably.
But what she experienced was quite different. Way stronger than she thought.
Instead of screaming, which her suddenly hoarse throat won’t allow, she bits hard into her own lips, piercing the skin and making the blood flow. Her first reaction is to grab the flaming arm with her other hand to support it, but that only causes the flames to catch on the other arm as well.
Her fingers clutch tightly, as if paralyzed, around the crystal, and her heart is pounding. Her knees go weak, and she starts to crumble down onto the ground, slowly.
She takes that back.
Once again, she takes it back. All back.
"…no…" she whispers faintly, and it’s terrifyingly odd to hear her voice without the echo to it, "…not again…"
Her light orbs sizzle, cover in a shock of electricity, and explode with a slight poof, as if they collapsed in themselves.
She can hear it. But cannot comprehend. The pain… the energy…
She did it again.
It’s too much.
All she learned was in vain.
She crossed the line again. But this time there’s nothing that can be burned out to stop the flood.
She hears the creaking of the bow, Syndra welcomes that sound, because she knows it will bring quick and bright solace. She’s not immortal, after all. A well-aimed arrow and the power will simply… disperse, right?
She wanted to tell him. She wasn’t sure if it’s her thoughts, or if she’s truly speaking… She wanted him to forgive her.
"I’m so sorry, Varus. I’m so sorry for my insolence. For my arrogance. You carried a burden far greater than I thought. I thought I could take it from you. I thought I can endure it. Now this is the least I can do to… repay my debts."
When the arrow reaches the crystal, it shakes and a large crack defines two halves of it, although they stay together. The flames freeze in place as if time stopped.
Syndra falls on her knees, and then forward, completely motionless, like a cloth doll. She doesn’t seem to be responsive… nor breathing.
#<<MERRY CHRISTMAS HAVE SOME REPLIES>>#<<I DON'T KNOW WRITE A SHORT FINISHER OR SOMETHING OR JUST LET IT GO>>
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Her hands seem to shake when she lets go of the crystal, the flames disappearing with a slight sizzle. She stands completely silent and still for a few moments, then shuffling of fabric can be heard as she crosses her arms in a negative, disobeying pose.
“Open your eyes." Syndra says in a commanding tone. There’s something off about her voice, though. It seems stiffled. Is she holding something back? "Look at me, Varus!”
One of her hands dashes towards his face, and grabs him by the jawline, forcing him to rise his head. The claws on her fingers painfully press against the man’s skin.
“You’re a person willing to sacrifice himself for the good of others. Who burdened himself with that power to avenge people dear to him. And me? I am the Pallas in my story! I am the destruction! I’m the unruly power that killed my guardian! If you want to die, if you deserve to die, if-…”
Her blood-red lips are trembling, just like her light orbs.
“No." she says, letting his face go, her fingers sliding down his neck as if she lost control of them. "No." she repeats, resting the hand on his collarbone.
And then she grabs the crystal on his chest and rips it off, the flames immediately engulfing her whole forearm.
“LIVE!”
As Syndra rips out the crystal from Varus, immense pain floods over his body. Dark, purple fluid starts dripping from the ends of his fingers. His armored palms start melting down as the corruption can't hold itself together without its source for too long.
"NO! WHAT HAVE YOU DONE?" , he screams, jumping back from Syndra. "If I don't stop this soon, she'll start transforming... there won't be anything left on this world one she does,", he thought," But... with the crystal gone I can't possibly be able to save her."
As the flames slowly moved up Syndra's arm, varus remembered an old sealing ritual he was taught to perform once he took up protecting the temple. It was used to keep the Pallas inside the temple were it ever trying to escape its prison. It required a catalyst, something with strong magic imbued in it. There was another option however. The Pallas fed itself on memories and feelings, so an item meaningful to the one performing the sealing could sometimes be used as a substitute.
"This has to work, otherwise, everything will be in vain. Please survive this, Syndra." said Varus, as he started taking off his scarf. As the red fabric dropped to the ground, he lifted the locket from his collarbones by the chain. He opens it for the last time, kissing the picture inside it. He closes it, takes up his bow and places the locket in it like he would an arrow. Varus pulls it by the chain and starts reciting a prayer to the Owl. "Oh Wise One, you who protect us and teach us. Listen to my voice..." With each verse he recites, a golden light briefly shines over the locket. A few moments later, when the flames had almost engulfed Syndra's entire arm he reaches the final verse. As he finishes saying it, the locket turns into a golden arrow. He pulls back his right arm and with it, the bow expands and channels additional energy into the arrow.
Varus lets go of the sealing arrow, sending it towards the crystal in Syndra's arm. As the arrow flies, the bow in Varus' arms snaps in half and drained of energy, he falls down to his knees breathing heavily.
Inner Demons
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Varus puts the bow from his left hand onto his back with one swift maneuver. Staring down at the energy emanating from the Justicar's fingertips Varus grabs Syndra's arm holding the crystal with both his hands and grips her wrist strongly.
"That's exactly what I wanted. An excuse. I can't be redeemed, there's no salvation for one who's done what I have. I threw my life away when my family was taken from me. My sense of duty got the better of me and I caused the deaths of countless innocent Ionians. Do you still think that I was strong? I wasn't. I was always weak, always a coward, hiding behind a bow and a sense of duty. That's why I'm not afraid to die. I deserve to, in fact. I won't let another bystander die because of my foolishness. If this power was to be set free, nothing would stop it."
Varus lets go of Syndra and looks straight at her face.
"Stop this and let go of the crystal. You don't know what you're getting yourself into. If you take the corruption from me, it will take you over. It grows stronger from host to host, so there's no mistaking the fact. With your innate power... it would cause a cataclysm. Just let go of it. If it means killing me is your next move... I have no regrets left."
He stares up and closes his eyes, letting out a deep sigh.
"Do what you have to, Syndra. I won't hold it against you."
Inner Demons
“I was given a chance. Even after I defeated myself, and became broken." Syndra slowly reaches to her headpiece, and looks like she was fiddling with the fasteners that keep it in place, but stops after a brief moment. .
“You’ve came to me to seek redemption, salvation… or an excuse? An escape from the past? “Justicar” is not the one to “justify” your deeds. Neither me or anybody else will tell you that everything will be all right without lying to you, Varus. Your heart will never be pure again… but it can be just.”
Her orbs, till now floating aimlessly around, gather and close up to them.
“Do you really want to die? You’re a good man. Something I cannot say about myself. You were strong enough to be chosen as the guardian, and now you give up? Maybe I should’ve had approached the temple long ago.”
Carefully, as to not alarm him, she reaches out to touch the crystal on his chest. “Maybe you deserve what you lost. Maybe I could help you. Maybe indeed your madness is but the whispers… If the whispers make it that one wants to die if they can’t handle them… Do you want to die? Or do you want me to?”
Purple flames flash around the crystal, the energy lingering at Syndra’s fingers, just like it danced in the disc in the temple when it tempted Varus.
#<<ok for real now I think we're at the point where you either kill him (or try to and the summoners interrupt actually) or just knock#<<Or just surprise me I'll react accordingly>>
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With each of Syndra's sentences Varus' heart pounds harder. He begins to realise his faulires. He wants to shout his anger out again, but Syndra's gaze leaves him unable to do so. Instead he straightens his back and speaks in an unusally calm tone while looking straight into her.
"I lost to my monster years ago. The Varus that would fight it is long gone from this world. What's left is but a husk struggling to justify its miserable existence. I am that monster, I've been one ever since I took up this cursed bow. There is nothing left for me to look forward to and there never will be."
Varus looks upon is left arm, extending it to the side. He begins summoning his bow into it as he points his right arm at Syndra and addresses her again.
"There's no redemption for me. Your words tell me as much and you know it's true. If you want to do it, stick to your word and kill me right here. I must warn you that if you decide to do so, I will fight back and show you just what kind of monster I became."
He takes a quick look at his nearly complete bow. As soon as it's ready, he lowers it to his side.
"So, which will it be, Justicar? Will you fight me, or will you let me go?"
Inner Demons
“No.”
Syndra’s voice vibrates in the air as if there was echo of the single word she said. Her face doesn’t move the slightest.
She jumps down from the root, landing gracefully on her orb, and walking down from one to another like they were stairs. When she lays a foot on the ground, she doesn’t face Varus, though.
“No." Syndra repeats, "Because if I was to do that, I’d have to put an end to you here and now. You’re already losing grasp of yourself if you want to wait until you hurt an innocent before you’re stopped. Who’s wife you want to kill before I’m supposed to end you? Who’s son? Who you want to make a tomb of, for people to weep at?"
With her being next to him, not even looking at him, it seems like she’s talking to the tree instead Varus, but each of her words sting like a dagger.
“Do not follow my road. Have something to look forward to, instead of something to look back at and feel guilt. You haven’t listened to the Duchess when she said not to become a monster to defeat one, and so didn’t I. We both regret things, but there’s still hope, archer. Duchess Karma told me that a monster can also be tamed… instead of defeated. “
She finally turns towards him, as if waiting for a response.
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"I've waited for this moment for so long and this is all the advice she had to offer? There's no rest for the wicked... as if I didn't know that already!", he thinks to himself as Syndra fell silent above him. Varus stands up and furiously punches the tree root he'd been sitting by, causing a few leaves to fall from it.
Suddenly, he screams at the top of his lungs. "I've had enough of it already! All this corruption, fighting for reign over my own body, enough!". He hits the tree over and over again, as if to take out the anger in his sentences out on anything, just not on himself. "The Owl won't hold the Pallas forever? Very well! I'll use whatever time I have left to do exactly what I set out to do! Every last one of them! Every one responsible! I'll eradicate them like the insects they are while I still can!"
Varus falls to his knees, grips his locket through the scarf he's wearing and closes his eyes, burying himself in thought once again. "Forgive me, darling. I don't think I can finish everything I promised you I would but I'll try my best. I'll be with you soon."
He stands up and looks upon Syndra, who also seems to have trailed off in her thoughts. "Syndra," he calls out to her, "I want you to promise me something. When the time is right, I'll come to you asking for this favor in my right mind, but shall I lose my saity before I decide it's my time... I want you to be the one to kill me."
Inner Demons
Syndra shrugs.
“I have no need to know it. But you do. Speaking often helps to realise certain truths.”
She touches his shoulder with her hand as if to catch his attention, although her head is still facing other way.
“There is no way out of the path you chose. There is never any way to turn back out of power. It burns the bridges it leads you through. Is that a thing you want is something that is none of my bussiness or my interest. But I will say one thing, one thing that Duchess Karma once told me. You cannot change the past, but you can change the future. What you will do with who you are, where you are, and what you can do, is purely your choice now.”
Her hand wanders up along his neck, and soon her fingertips rest on the Owl tattoos near Varus’ eyes.
“The Owl is only as strong as you are. It will not hold the Pallas away forever… unless you will. Do not turn blind with rage and hatred. "
With that, she stops touching him, and straightens herself on the root, giving him a moment to think about her words. “Her”… she didn’t tell him anything the Duchess hadn’t told her before.
#<<wow I'm getting dramatic here feel free to call him insane or something>>#transcendedjusticar#<<Ok I also changed my writing patterns to be a bit more cohesive and alike yours to make reading those things easier>>
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"I'm pretty sure one bottle would be enough to not only make you forget, but also knock you out for a week, actually."
"I miss the simpler times when a few bottles of ale were enough to make me forget…"
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<<That's my personal tho>>
aatrox started following you
"Hello there Kin. What brings you here?"
#<< don't worry a lot of people make that mistake>>#out of agony#<<going to sleep so sorry for breaking off things like that>>
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<<Signal boosting>>
OOC: Send me phrases
((I want to practice a bit calligraphy. All will be posted here :3))
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"I miss the simpler times when a few bottles of ale were enough to make me forget..."
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"You've been around on this world longer. Why don't you tell me?"
"True, but considered the possibility that Thresh stole his wife?"
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<<I am terribly sorry my rp comes in two varieties - insane crack or longass paragraphs there's no in-between>>
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"Haven't you ever heard of the saying? Don't argue about dicks with a man who has nothing to lose?"
"It might just be the case of him having one run-in too many with Hecarim or Thresh."
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"Minor detail."
"Things I don’t want to think about: Shadow Isles champs with dicks.
They’re probably half rotted off and disgusting
Or see-through
Eugh.”
#<<ghost cock is obviously the most important reason he just wants to get rid of them>>#<<I mean seriously mike>
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