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addvcrse · 1 year

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@thebigshotman x

There was a sound like an engine stalling as Spaul stopped mid-stride, head swiveling 180 degrees towards the source of the sound before the rest of his body, slowly and carefully, caught up.

Ah, yes, The Beast. It was a NEO too. And despite his newly acquired body, Spaul would be lying if he wasn’t still at least a little frightened of it. But now there were three NEOs around! He had to establish supremacy somehow! Not aware he was the smallest of the three.

*[[Hello~]] BEAST!!! N0W I’M-I’M [just like you,]!!! W1TH A [workout ready body] TO PROTECT-T0 PROT3CT [Hazelnut] WITH!!!!

Did The Beast know about Eileen? Would bringing her up spell trouble with trying to reach her? He didn’t really care too much at the moment, as he was trying to appear bigger than it. Speaking of that, he proudly showed off his four untethered strings, smiling even wider than he already was.

*I EVEN H4-HAVE [[No Strings on Me]]!!!! UNL1KE YO-YOU!!! [[Amazed by this amazing transformation?]] Y3-E-ET???

He hoped he was genuinely looking intimidating and not like a literally humongous dork. Especially since its facial expressions were unreadable, to say the least.

Sadly for Spaul, The Beast was not easily intimidated even at the best of times, thanks to its enormous ego. However, it was quite impressed by the unbound strings and let him know as much, emitting a low whistle.

* [Neat-o]! it chirped, fingers clenching and unclenching around the edge of its rooftop perch with restless energy. * MANAGED TO [Score!] S0ME [Freebies], HUH? [Congration]!! I THINK YOU’rE [Our Very First Customer] TO DO THAT!

The Beast paused speaking for a moment, if only to inch its backside closer to the roof’s ledge. Was it preparing to jump down? Possibly. But it was equally likely it just felt like sitting that way.

* SO WH3RE ARE YOU OFF TO [This Fine Evening]? LOOKING FOR [Hazelnut]? I’M SURE SHE>S AR0UND SOMEWHERE!

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addvcrse · 1 year

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* HMM, I WONDER WHAT [Freezer Burned] [Whole Turkey Breast] HAS GOTT3N UP TO LATELY... I HAVEN,T SEEN [He/She/It] IN A WHILE.

* OH WELL. WE HAVE [We're Gonna Need A Bigger Boat] PR0BLEMS RIGHT NOW!

#ic | spamton | [[number 1 rated salesman1997]].#addvcrse | frostbite.

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addvcrse · 1 year

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* WELL, HE CAN,T SAY WE DIDN'T [Warning! Warning!] HIM. R3ST IN [Pieces], SPAUL!!

#commentary | are you getting all this [mike]!?#ic | spamton | [[number 1 rated salesman1997]].#thebigshotman | spaul.

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addvcrse · 1 year

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thebigshotman:

Spaul craned his neck to keep his eyes on it, though the marbles on his glasses looked down in an almost embarrassed fashion, the exact way he felt inside. Right, The Beast was “God”, not “NEO”. It seemed to be currently inhabiting an evolution of NEO. But that did not make its experience with the form any less valuable to hear.

At the question, the marbles finally cooperated with their owner and looked back up to stare right at its nonexistent face. The hum was comforting. Or at least enough that he could ignore the hitch in his throat and answer.

*I WANT…I W4NT TO FEEL [[bigger and better than ever!]] W1TH [no strings attached!]. T0 [[SAVE]] EVERY ON3 AND [Hyperlink Blocked] THEM. ESPECILLY [Hazelnut]….

*I’M [[start your own business]] TO TH1NK THAT [smooth taste of] IS THE ONLY [[choice]] TO DO THAT. BUT…TH4T WOULD MEAN [relive the memories of-] AGA1N. AND…

The marbles magnified. Looking into the faceless void for guidance when he had no idea if there would be any.

*SH0ULD I???

Perhaps The Beast was just in a generous mood. Perhaps some of its former humanity still lay beneath its monstrous exterior. Whatever the reason, the godly NEO did not actually encourage Spaul to go with the self-destructive choice.

* [NEO] IS GR3At FOR FEELING [Bigger And Better Than Ever!] BUT NOT S0 MUCH FOR [No Strings Attached]. THERE ARE MANY [Strings Attached]. SO MANY! EHAEAHAEAHAEA!!

It jerked its neck around, illustrating the green strings that were wound around it and roped about its wrists. Even in this supposedly superior form, there was no escape.

* IN MY [Expert Opinion], [NEO] WON<T HELP YOU [[SAVE]] ANYONE. YOU’LL NEED TO F1ND A DIFFERENT [Power Source]. [Sorry!]

#rp | a [[communion]] with [[unintelligible laughter]].#ic | spamton | [[number 1 rated salesman1997]].#thebigshotman | spaul.

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addvcrse · 1 year

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@thebigshotman x

The Beast regarded Spaul with one of its rarer serious looks (such as it was). Fortunately for Spaul, it seemed the creature felt like being genuinely helpful for once.

* I'VE BEEN [[God]] FOR SO LONG I ALMOST FORGOT WHAT BEING [[NEO]] IS LIKE! it replied, slowly waving its tail as it spoke. * IT WAS [Fantastic]! HOLY [Cungadero] DID IT FEEL GOOD!! ... FOR ALL OF [Five More Minutes]. THEN 1T JUST FELT LIKE [Bitter Disappointment].

It tilted its head at Spaul, emitting a gentle, buzzing mechanical hum.

* WHAT DO YOU WANT TO FE3L?

#rp | a [[communion]] with [[unintelligible laughter]].#ic | spamton | [[number 1 rated salesman1997]].#thebigshotman | spaul.

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addvcrse · 2 years

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* YOU’RE ALL SUCH [Genoris] [Little Worm]S, AREN’T YOU? I COULD [Cry Out Into The Darkness]!!

* KEEP THE KROMER [Rolling In]!

#commentary | are you getting all this [mike]!?#ic | spamton | [[number 1 rated salesman1997]].

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addvcrse · 2 years

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unforgettable-garbage1997:

Tucked away at the back of the cavern was an entire Oatmeat. The clean white plumage stood out among the dingy items scattered around the nest. Its parent had left it unattended here, but had the mindfulness to leave it with several heaped blankets and various playthings that had clearly belonged to another child once upon a time.

Not that Oatmeat was playing with any of them, it had found the best toy in the world: its own tail. It had been running in circles, chasing after the limb, freezing only when the Beast showed up. People weren’t supposed to be in here!

Oatmeat rose up onto its hind legs and T-posed as menacingly as it could at the Beast.

* scared!

The beast was quite capable of being an amoral asshole, when it felt like it. Ascending to godhood had not erased its duplicitous, selfish nature. But instead of shaking off Oatmeat’s attempt to intimidate it, the beast indulged the hatchling by letting out a Wilhelm scream and flopping onto the ground, curling belly-up like a large hognose snake.

* VERY SCAReY! I’M [[Died]] 0F FRIGHT!!

#rp | a [[communion]] with [[unintelligible laughter]].#ic | spamton | [[number 1 rated salesman1997]].#unforgettable-garbage1997 | oatmeat.

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addvcrse · 2 years

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unforgettable-garbage1997:

The ribs were tasty, but they weren’t enough to make up for a brief lifetime of eating cereal. It started bobbing up and down again, cheeping incessantly. That seemed to work, judging by the sheer amount of new, good-smelling things that came out of the Beast when it did that!

That was a lot of things though… where was it supposed to start?

Rayzor’s tiny beak poked and sniffed at each item the Beast had offered it. Everything smelled appetizing, but now that it had time to poke around, some things seemed tastier than others. Like that steak. And that lamb chop. But wait- there were also cans of… something kind of yucky, but the can itself was pretty good.

Unlike its birth parent, Rayzor had the sense to stop before it went too far. But there was also a bunch of leftovers just strewn all over the place! What would Cobalt think? Rayzor beeped at the Beast, fluffed up and unwilling to eat another bite.

Amazing! The NEOlet was not, in fact, a black hole! But it was much smaller and didn’t have much experience with good food, so perhaps that wasn’t so surprising. Neither was the fact that it seemed to prefer unprocessed meats over processed ones, or that it enjoyed the metal cans. Still, it was fun to watch and figure out such things along with Rayzor itself.

As for Cobalt... The beast didn’t care about what Cobalt thought. But it did care about the leftovers. Waste not, want not, after all! So after Rayzor settled down, the larger NEO swept its face over the floor, reabsorbing everything the hatchling hadn’t eaten.

* YUM YUM it remarked, somewhat automatically. * DELICIS,. TIME FOR [Food Coma]?

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addvcrse · 2 years

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unforgettable-garbage1997:

Tiny bits of brown tufts were stuck to the inside of the bowl, alongside that ever-present cereal dust. Seems the bowl was used both for eating from and sleeping in. The creature had a pillow to rest on, but from the looks of things, it just really liked this bowl.

The diet of sugar and grain probably explained why it was so small and constantly shaking. Although it was hard to tell if it was shaking because it was trying very hard to stand upright on two legs like an Addison, or if it was shaking because its body was filled with sugar at all times.

The Beast was doing something over the bowl. Some primal reflex fired off in Rayzor’s tiny developing mind and it started chirping up a storm, excited for what was about to happen next. What happened next had it bobbing violently up and down, the chirping reaching a peak. Food! Actual food! It smelled so good! Rayzor tore into the ribs, operating on the same hard-coded instinct that had anticipated the food. Unfit for most babies, yet this was not “most babies”. Tiny teeth and claws ripped meat from the bone as if born to do so (because it was).

It was gone in seconds, bones picked completely clean. Still stunned by how good that tasted compared to the usual fare, it tipped its head up, fixated on the Beast’s void of a face, jaws slightly agape. If only this Bigger It would take it home!

Despite its claims of godliness, the beast was not omniscient. It didn’t know the depths of what was going on in Rayzor’s tiny mind. So when the NEOlet looked up at it, the beast simply figured Rayzor was still hungry.

Which probably was true, all things considered.

* READY FOR 2ECONDS? it asked, not waiting for an answer before providing the hatchling with a T-bone steak – followed by a drumstick, a lamb chop, an order of buffalo wings, six cans of Spam, an open package of alligator jerky, and a jar of pickled pigs’ feet. Eagerly, the beast watched to see what Rayzor would do with such a smorgasbord, tail wiggling madly out of sight.

#rp | a [[communion]] with [[unintelligible laughter]].#ic | spamton | [[number 1 rated salesman1997]].#unforgettable-garbage1997 | rayzor.

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addvcrse · 2 years

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unforgettable-garbage1997:

Rayzor’s head arced to one side, until it was upside-down. Sitting on its haunches, it felt at its own chest as it stared at the brightly-colored chest of the Beast. Cobalt didn’t have one of those… but Rayzor did. This was one of its kind! It was certain of it. Immediately trusting of the Beast, it chirped enthusiastically at it. A shame it was stuck out there. The metallic clunking of the Beast sitting down all but confirmed it. That was the sound Rayzor made when it flopped too roughly for bed, but much louder.

It was also talking to Rayzor. It flipped its head the other way. Where had it heard a voice like that before? It wasn’t any he heard behind the walls, nor was it Cobalt’s voice. Perhaps from its dreams? Feeding. It knew that word! Rayzor opened its mouth to answer the Beast’s question, but all that came out were a few disjointed syllables.

For lack of useful language, it hobbled its way to an overturned bowl and brought it over to the Beast for it to inspect (and hopefully fill). Smelled like sugary cereal.

Though it wasn’t the same type of NEO as Rayzor and thus didn’t know where its developmental milestones were supposed to be, the beast couldn’t help but frown (such as it was) at the hatchling’s lack of words. Spafnir was a very chatty creature, and an excellent mimic, to boot – surely his offspring would be the same? Was Cobalt doing that badly at being a parent?

The smell of the bowl Rayzor offered suggested they were. Even Lightner parents knew not to give their kids too much sugary cereal, and a bowl this size compared to the NEOlet was an outrageous amount. Not to mention, grains weren’t exactly the food of choice for creatures that possessed sharp claws and teeth.

* TIME TO [Fire Up The Barbecue]! the beast announced before arching its neck over the bowl and releasing an entire rack of baby back ribs from its face void. Was it food appropriate for a baby? No. But it was definitely better than the cereal.

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addvcrse · 2 years

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unforgettable-garbage1997:

Walls were noisy. That was one of maybe five major facts about the world that Rayzor had come to understand. But walls were also solid. Things weren’t supposed to come out of them!

The baby chirped with alarm and jolted to its feet when the Beast stuck its head into the shop. Its first concern was whether the Beast was allowed to do this or not. Its second concern was that the long, noodly creature (or what Rayzor could see of it) resembled itself more than Cobalt. Familiar enough to it that it didn’t feel too compelled to “hide” inside the nearest bowl.

It chirped again at the Beast, demanding its attention.

And, certainly, Rayzor got it.

* [The Baby Is You!] the beast cooed at it, trying to jiggle a bit more of its body into the room. The pink and yellow tip of its chest pyramid bobbed in and out of the wall with its efforts. * AND WHAT A [Collector’s Edition], TOO! BR0WN [Is The New Black]!

Giving up on its attempt to enter, the older NEO plopped down outside, creating a metallic clunking noise. It sure didn’t seem to care about being heard... but what would Cobalt be able to do about it, anyway? Besides, so long as it didn’t steal the hatchling back, Cobalt probably wouldn’t mind. Heck, maybe they could get some sleep while the beast “babysat”.

* YOU SURE LOOK SCRAWNY, THOUGH, KID! WHAT”S THT [Cuckoo] FEEeDING YOU?

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addvcrse · 2 years

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hxzelwallflower:

❝ Oh no , I-I just brought stuff like blankets , food , and some clothes in case they need something warmer to change into . ❞ It was right about one thing at least . Not sure why the individual in question would have such a personal vendetta against shoes though .

* [Perfect-o!] THEY’LL LOVE THAT!

All safe gifts for someone you didn’t know well, and all items that the Addison could and would use. Especially the blankets. It felt to the beast like they could never be warm enough.

* DID YOU WAN T ME TO [You’ve Got Mail!] OR WOULD YOU RATHER [Add A Personal Touch]?

#rp | a [[communion]] with [[unintelligible laughter]].#ic | spamton | [[number 1 rated salesman1997]].#hxzelwallflower | eileen.

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addvcrse · 2 years

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@thebigshotman x

Oh no. After just baiting a potentially powerful anon to fight him, the last thing he needs is that faceless Beast he’s inwardly afraid of. Too late, here it is.

Don’t think he hasn’t heard its excited murmurings from afar on the rooftops, observing Spaul squirming for the SOUL and now his life. Seeing it do a little dance just makes him groan exasperatedly, the voice clip of a booing audience playing before he replies.

*[[Hello there~]] B3AST. N0 I DON’T HAVE THE [HeartShapedObject] YET. ACTUALLY MY-MY-Y-Y [$4.99] LIFE IS PROB4BLY ABOUT TO [*video game explosion noise*].

His voice sounds like a tired car salesman, exhausted from having to stand in the heat all day and peddle these vehicles.

*TH1NK YOU MIGHT W4NT TO USE YOUR [[I HAVE [Becomed] G0D.]] 4ND [help me…please, dear god, help me!!]??

He looks up and up and up at it, hands on his hips as he taps his foot. He has no idea why it looks so happy or what it wants, but while it’s here he might as well be desperate a little more and beg for help.

The beast stops dancing, watching Spaul curiously. This is a rather unexpected reaction from the salesman — if anything, it thought he would be angry it isn't taking the matter seriously, or terrified because of the impending confrontation with that anon. Instead, Spaul just seems... tired.

* WHY, OF C0URSE I WANT TO [Help]! WHY ELSE WOULD I BE HERE? it asks, seemingly chipper again. * I DON'T WANT TO SEE YOU G3T [Squashed Like A Grape]! I LIKE YOU!

Probably best not to think about why that might be.

* SO IF YOU SEE THAT [Invalid_Username] AROUND, JUST [Sent via iPad] TO My, AND I"LL [It's Been Taken Care Of] FOR YOU. IN FACT, SINCE YOU'VE BEiNG HAVING SUCH A H4RD TIME, I'LL EVEN THROW IN A [[SOUL]] FOR FREE!

#rp | a [[communion]] with [[unintelligible laughter]].#ic | spamton | [[number 1 rated salesman1997]].#thebigshotman | spaul.

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addvcrse · 2 years

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* MAYBE IF HE REALLY GETS INTO DEEP [$!$$] I’LL HELP HIM 0UT BY HIDING HIM FOR A WHILE. ANONS DON”T HAVE N3ARLY AS MUCH POWER AS THE YTHINK THEY DO~

The beast is having entirely too much fun watching Spaul flounder around in the hole he’s dug himself.

#commentary | are you getting all this [mike]!?#ic | spamton | [[number 1 rated salesman1997]].#thebigshotman | spaul.

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addvcrse · 2 years

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* WHAT'S THAT CONTR4CT SAY, ANYWAY? HE DIDN'T EVEN [Read The Fine Print]!!

* YOU CAN T3LL ME, [Input_Title] ANON, I [Prommy]~

#commentary | are you getting all this [mike]!?#ic | spamton | [[number 1 rated salesman1997]].#thebigshotman | spaul.

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addvcrse · 2 years

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thebigshotman:

Spaul’s glasses flicker with static, and after another moment he seems to “come back online” with a fiddle of the frayed bow on his suit. The Beast wasn’t the first version of himself to warn him that the Addisons seemed to be engaging in Mike-type behavior, and it probably wouldn’t be the last. Still though…it was good to know they were all thinking the same thing.

*I [[hopes and dreams]] TH4T IT’S NOT ABOUT THE [estimated sales today:]. I M3AN…THEY PROBABLY GAVE ME SOME [[free samples]] F0R A REASON.

He looks up into the ever shifting cloud of pixels that make up its face, eyes in his glasses shaking for guidance.

*[Inquire today!] IS A G00D IDEA…BUT WHAT 1F THEY ARE??? SHOULD I-I-I-I [[garbage collection]] THEM??

By that he means toss them into the trash. Like he once was.

The beast tilts its head, slightly confused by the notion. Perhaps it shouldn’t have been, though. It had brought up how they’d been left in the dark by someone purporting to help them just moments before; naturally that would be what was on Spaul’s mind.

* IF THEY’RE TRYING TO USE YOU, SURE, it replies, scratching at its metallic side with a hind claw (and dragging its tail along via the connected string in the process). * BUT IF THEiY’RE TRYING TO [Let’s Be Friends!] THEN THERE’S NO REASON TO.? FRI3NDSHIP IS JUST [Like That].

And while it was possible that Spaul’s old Addison group was looking to take advantage of him in some way, he just didn’t seem like an appealing target for anyone looking to make some money.

* YOU REMEMEBER WHAT [The Fun Gang] WAS LIKE, DON’T YOU?

#rp | a [[communion]] with [[unintelligible laughter]].#ic | spamton | [[number 1 rated salesman1997]].#thebigshotman | spaul.

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addvcrse · 2 years

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@sanguinehaven

* [Winner, Winner, Chicken Dinner] FOR ME; I KNEW IT WOULD BE CERISE!

Well, that wasn't entirely true. The incorrect use of "he" had thrown it off. But when it came to jerking Spaul's chain, Cerise would be the first Addison to go after.

* DO YOU THINK HE'LL [Agree To All]? PERS0NALLY I THINK HE WILL BUT THEN [Bawk!!] AT THE LAST MINUTE~

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