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writtenbymisunderstoodnerds · 16 days

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You hate each other, right? (Tierna Davidson x Reader)

This wasn't requested or something I actually planned to write, but writers block is a bitch. Titles are hard, this isn't edited and I don't think this is very good, but here it is. Hope you enjoy :)

I'm going to try work on my actual wips so we'll see how that goes.

Warnings: None that I can think of, but let me know if I need to add anything.

Words: 4k

Tierna and I had always had a strained relationship. By that I meant we absolutely hated each other for years. Honestly, seeing as many many years had passed, we could barely remember what had caused the problem in the first place. Something to do with an injury or something.

Everything between us had changed one day when our argument ended in making out instead of shouting like normal. It seemed that over the years the hatred had turned to romantic feelings on both sides. After the kiss, there was lots of awkwardness and avoiding each other until I finally just asked her out one day when we were alone in the elevator. We had decided to keep everything on the downlow as first so we could learn how to have a relationship that didn't involve fighting or hatred. It wasn't actually that difficult because I quickly became addicted to everything Tierna. If her clinginess was anything to go off, then it was safe to say that Tierna felt the same.

To keep everyone from getting suspicious, the last couple of months we had kept our outside relationship the same. There were glares, not talking to each other, and scoffs when the other spoke. The mean comments we used to make had pretty much stopped now. I couldn't bring myself to say anything bad about her, not when I was falling for her faster than I could keep up. If anyone ever asked, I just couldn't be bothered with it anymore.

We had just gotten back from training. Tierna and I were glaring at each other as always while Emily stood between us as a kind of buffer. Tierna and I were sharing a room like we had been for the most part of the year. It was the teams way of trying to get us to get along. Little did they know how well that actually worked.

The glares lasted until the door closed behind us, finally away from the prying eyes of our team mates. Tierna turned, soft smile replacing the scowl as she fell into my arms. My hand slipped under her shirt, nails scratching along her back as she sighed, kissing my neck softly.

"You okay love?"

"Just tired and I missed you today."

"I was with you the whole day."

"Well yeah, but I couldn't touch you let alone look at you nicely. I was craving cuddles all day."

"I'm sorry, we have the rest of the evening to cuddle."

"We have team bonding tonight though." Tierna pouted, moving to find comfy clothes. I groaned at the lack of contact, moving to wrap my arms around her waist. She gently shrugged me off, moving away from me. It was a clear sign she was upset about something. I lay on the bed, allowing her space to change and decide if she wanted to come to me or not.

Tierna sat on the other bed for a few minutes scrolling through her phone before she sighed, throwing it back on the bed and walking over to me. I opened my arms, letting her lay on top of me, head resting against my neck. "I don't want to pretend to hate you anymore. It's exhausting, I hate that I can't even smile at you when we're around them, I can't run to you during games or hold your hand or be close to you like I need when I'm tired, nervous or down."

"Okay. Well, we can start being friends in front of them."

Tierna looked up at me, "Yeah?"

"If that's what you want. I'm sorry that we haven't been able to do any of that stuff. It's not that I don't want to, trust me I hate it as much as you do if not more. All I ever want to do is be with you, my favourite thing in this world is your cuddles. I would prefer to keep our relationship to ourselves for a bit longer though."

I had always preferred to keep my relationships more private, but it was also in part because we constantly got roomed together in attempt to make us get along. I wasn't ready to have that change yet. Not just because I liked sleeping in the same bed with my girlfriend, but also because I hated change. It wouldn't be a big deal if my roommate changed pretty much every camp, that didn't happen so I had gotten used to Tierna and our routine. I dreaded that changing.

"Thank you. I'll just be happy with a smile or maybe a hug every now and then. There's no pressure to tell them about us, whenever you're ready I'm ready. I know you're scared about your routine changing and we'll protect that for as long as we can. And if or when it does, I've got you. Always."

I brushed a piece of hair out of her face, soft smile making it's way onto my face. We hadn't said the three big words yet, but I had known for a while that I was in love with her. Everything with her was warm, comforting, safe. "I love you T."

A grin made it's way onto her face before she kissed me deeply, "I love you Y/n."

---

It had been two weeks since we had agreed to be more friendly. We had decided to slowly start being more friendly so it wouldn't be suspicious. At first it was just stopping the glares and actually saying a few words that weren't mean or snarky. Now we had decided smiles and maybe some proper conversations were the next step.

We were at breakfast, Tierna sat at the table across the room while I sat with Emily and Rose. I hated that she was sat away from me, but unfortunately it had always been that way. Tierna sent a small smile my way. I sent a small smile back managing to stop the grin trying to escape. Emily and Rose followed my eyeline, confusion covering their faces when they noticed it was Tierna I was smiling at. I just shrugged going back to eating my breakfast.

My peace only last a few minutes until Emily spoke up, "So have you and T have worked things out? There seems to be less glares, more smiles."

"I guess so. We actually talked a couple of weeks ago and could barely remember why we didn't like each other. We're trying to be friends."

"Finally. Maybe we'll all be able to be in the same room peacefully."

Over the rest of camp, the smiles and conversation became more frequent. The confusion or shock that covered the teams face for the first week was hilarious. Thankfully, after the initial shock, they seemed to back off their nosiness a bit. They seemed to realise we were more friendly without their prying eyes. It was nice though, being able to actually look at Tierna or be around her even if I couldn't touch her much.

---

Camps had always been one of my favourite things. I loved being around the girls, just getting to train and mess around. This time though, I almost wanted to just leave. Since Tierna and I were becoming 'friends', we had finally been roomed with different people. We had only been at camp for two days and my nerves were through the roof. They had been since I arrived. It wasn't what I was used to and I wasn't entirely sure how to cope with it. My whole routine had been disrupted without warning. The team knew I didn't like change, but I guess no one really thought this was something that would affect me too bad.

Training had finished an hour ago, dinner and team bonding weren't for a few hours and I was stuck on my bed fidgeting with my fingers. Alyssa sat down next to me, nudging my shoulder gently, "Are you okay Y/n?"

"Yeah, yeah I'm okay."

"I call bullshit."

A sigh slipped out as my head rest against her shoulder. I didn't have the energy to pretend to be okay, "I love you Lys, really I do, but I hate this."

"Hate what?"

"Not rooming with Tierna. I know I used to not like it and we only just recently became friends, but that's what I was used to. For months, we had our routine, it didn't change much if at all. Just a bit of extra talking. Even then I knew what to expect. Now, it's all changed without warning and I don't think I'm coping very well with it."

"So, it's not just because you don't get to share with your girlfriend anymore?"

My head flew up, every muscle in my body tensing, "What?"

"Relax, I'm the only one that knows. I saw you guys making out in a hidden corner of the stadium when I took a wrong turn. You two are obviously pretending you're not great friends and hiding it for a reason. I haven't and won't tell anyone."

"Thank you Lys. I wish this was just because of that, but it's not. I don't deal with change very well at all. I like my routine and now it's completely different. If we hadn't been forced to room together for months, no routine would be formed and it wouldn't be this bad."

"I'm sorry that you were forced into a routine then forced out of it. We can see how you go for a couple of days and if it's not getting better then we can talk to coach and see if we can switch."

I smiled, accepting the hug she offered. It wasn't Tierna, but it was a close second. "I'm not mad at the forced rooming. I mean, T and I wouldn't be together without it. This is one of the reasons we haven't told anyone, to try hold onto my routine."

Much to my confusion, there was a light knock at the door. As far as I knew, everyone was hanging out in their rooms before dinner. My head buried in my hands, really not up for visitors as Alyssa went to open the door. Arms wrapped around me, my head resting against a stomach before the unmistakable smell of Tierna filled my senses. "Before you ask, Alyssa messaged saying you could use me so here I am."

"Thank you Lys."

"Always. I'm going to go for a walk, see you at dinner."

Tierna guided me to lie on the bed, cuddled up against her. It was probably the first time since camp started that I fully relaxed. "Love you T."

"I love you. I know this is difficult, but at least with Alyssa knowing we have more of a chance to see each other."

---

"Are you okay Y/n?" Christen asked as her and Alex sat on either side of me. I knew the team were getting concerned at how withdrawn I was and I appreciated they cared. However, getting asked multiple times a day if I was okay, was getting on my nerves.

"I'm fine." I snapped, retying my boots for the fourth time.

I knew I was being grumpy, but I couldn't help it. This whole routine change had messed with everything, especially my sleep. I was tired and stressed, trying to adjust and create a new routine. It wasn't working very well, but I was trying not to show it much. I didn't want to seem childish or be judged for my lack of adaptability. Tierna was trying her best to help, there wasn't much she could do beside comfort me. Alyssa had also been understanding, not taking my discomfort personally. There wasn't much she could do either though.

Alex and Christen gave me a look before pulling me away from everyone else, "Talk to us."

I sighed, burying my face in my hands, everything that had been happening spilling out. They let me talk, not saying anything until they were sure I was done. Christen rest her hand on my shoulder, squeezing slightly. "We get you're trying to tough it out, to adapt, but you could have told us before it got this bad. It's well known you don't do well with change and I guess we didn't think much of this since you had different room mates in the past. We'll talk to coach and see if you can change rooms assuming it's okay with Tierna and Rose."

"I'll be fine, I'll get over it."

"No, we need you to be at your best. So we'll talk to coach after practice."

"Thank you. Before you say it, I know I will need to get over it at some point. I won't always be able to have Tierna as a roommate. I'm working on it, my therapist is helping. I just think the lack of warning and no time to mentally prepare didn't help."

"We'll never tell you to get over it Y/n/n, but we are glad you're trying. We hate seeing you like this, we just want you to be okay."

Later that night when I finally made it back to my room after being dragged to hangout with Emily, I found Tierna lying on my bed, book in hand. I straddled her waist, kissing her forehead then nose and lips. "Well hello."

"Hi."

"Alyssa is rooming with Rose. I think you need an early night, you look exhausted."

"I think you're right. Sleep hasn't been easy the last few days."

---

Tierna: I'm thinking it's time for a date day. Sneak out with me?

Y/n: Don't have to ask me twice. I'm going to head back to the room to change, meet me there?

Tierna: Perfect, can't wait x

After making the excuse of planning to spend the day relaxing in the room, I slipped out of the meal room to get changed and meet Tierna. It wasn't unusual for me to spend a day or two at camp alone to recharge so I knew it wouldn't cause any concern aside from a text or two.

Soft lips landed against mine as soon as Tierna entered the room. "Hello to you too."

Tierna pecked my lips, "There was not enough of that this morning."

"Well if you had woken up when I tried then there would have been more kissing time."

"It's an off day, what's the point in waking up early?"

"Make out time."

"Whatever. I was thinking, we shower and make out more, then check out that book shop you were talking about. I didn't think about what else, but we can get lunch and there is a beach not far from here."

My arms wrapped around her waist, kissing her forehead. There hadn't been a lot of time to ourselves so I was very excited to spend the day with her. "Sounds incredible. I'm sure we can find some lowkey stuff to do. Could you imagine the shit we would get if the team found out about this from social media?"

"Shit, I didn't even think about that. Sneaky date day it is!"

As per Tiernas plan she dragged me into the shower, spending more time with her lips attached to me than actual shower activities. Not that I was complaining in the slightest. Tierna and I spent a lot more time in the room than originally planned, it being almost lunch time when I finally dragged Tierna out of the hotel.

We spent a while exploring the little book shop, taking our time looking at the different books and stealing kisses behind the book shelves. It was risky, we both knew it, but at the same time I was having too much fun with her to care. Though we weren't doing anything overly exciting, just getting to spend some alone time with the girl I loved was enough for it to be the most fun I had in a while. Spending time with the team was always fun, but it didn't compare to spending time with Tierna.

After finally dragging ourselves away from the book shop, we got sushi deciding to eat in the park. Thankfully, there weren't that many people and we managed to find a relatively secluded area.

At the start of the day, we had very much intended on actually doing things. However, we ended up spending quite a while lying on the grass at the park just talking. Since the start of our relationship, most of our time would be spent talking. At first it was getting to know each other properly, then it was just something we enjoyed. Tierna was one of the only people besides Emily that I could spend hours talking and not get bored. I never was much of a talker, but I actually looked forward to our talking time. Between games, training, meetings, and spending time with the team, we hadn't had a lot of time to just talk. Despite rooming together, by time we fell into bed, we were just ready to sleep.

Eventually we dragged ourselves up, making our way slowly to the beach, stopping at a few shops along the way. We walked along the beach, finding a hidden away part near the end. Tierna settled between my legs, back against my front as I nuzzled my face into her neck, "You're beautiful T. I've never been more grateful for our meddling teammates. I love you."

"I love you. This is something I never saw happening, but I would never want anything else. And I would never admit to them how thankful I am for their part in this."

"Oh never in a million years will I admit that to them. Thank you for today T, it's probably one of the best days I've had in a while."

"Really? We pretty much talked all day which is not what I planned."

"My love, any day I spend with you is amazing. Maybe it wasn't what you planned, but I don't care T. I love just talking to you and with how little time we've had together lately today was amazing. I love you, I loved today so please stop feeling bad like I know you are."

Tierna turned to look at me, not saying anything for a second while her eyes roamed my face. Probably making sure I was telling the truth. She pecked my cheek before whispering, "How did I get so lucky with you?"

"You didn't hit me when I kissed you that night."

"Didn't even cross my mind. I think by that point I was starting to realise that maybe I didn't hate you like I thought."

"Looking back you were blushing a lot around me then. No different to now I guess. You're just better at hiding it around the team."

My forehead was pushed back, Tierna pouting while I tried to stifle my laugh. She was adorable when she pouted. "Shut up asshole. Speaking of the team, we should probably head back soon."

Unfortunately for us, a few of the girls were lingering in the lobby and not at dinner like we had anticipated. The thought to hide was quickly pushed away when they all turned to look at us. "Where have you two been? We came to get you for dinner, but obviously you weren't there."

I had checked social media a few times just to make sure there wasn't any thing about us since a few people had stopped us for pictures. Thankfully, nothing had been posted yet and if it was the pictures were all innocent so I knew it was safe to make up a little lie. "We just went for a walk."

Emily pulled me into a headlock, normally I could get out of her hold pretty easily, but I was tired and not really in the mood. "Where was my invite? You know you're bestfriend incase you've forgotten."

My eyes rolled automatically, finally managing to push her away, "Em, stop being dramatic. It was a very last minute thing, not some conspiracy to leave you out. You are and will always be my bestfriend."

"Yeah whatever. I don't think you two willingly spending time together without killing each other will ever get old."

"Maybe not, but your comments already are. Now isn't there dinner then team bonding?"

---

The game was almost over when Tierna ended up on the ground due to a miss timed tackle. She didn't get up straight away and I saw red. Before I even fully realised what was happening, my hands were on the chest of the player who took Tierna down, pushing her back multiple times.

"Are you fucking stupid? You could hav-"

Arms gripped mine, pulling me back and finally snapped me out it. "Y/n, Y/n stop."

My arms went up in surrender, walking back to Tierna before I could do something stupid again. I knew I had gotten a yellow card, but the only thing that mattered was Tierna. I wanted so badly to hold her hand to comfort her properly, but I knew I couldn't. Instead I squeezed her shoulder gently, relief washing through me when she finally got up.

Everyone stared at us as Tierna and I walked into the locker room. I knew it was coming, I had just hoped it would be a few of the older ones and not everyone. Christen gave me a pointed look, Alyssa and Alex joining in. "What the hell was that Y/n?"

I shrugged, avoiding eye contact. I wouldn't say I regretted it because I wasn't sure I did. Though, I had likely disappointed them, something I hated doing. "I lost my temper."

"You never lose your temper Y/n. You don't even lose your temper when I go down and I'm your best friend. Yet you lose your temper when someone you're barely friends with gets tackled." Emily stated, arms crossed. There was no way they would let this go, it was definitely out of character for me. I had always been a calm person, never violent or short tempered. The look Tierna gave me told me she was thinking the same. This was it.

My arm wrapped around Tierna's shoulder, pressing a light kiss to her temple, "Well, become my girlfriend and apparently I will."

"You're what!?! You're fucking with us."

Questions and statements were fired our way, everyone shocked and confused how we were dating given the way we acted. "Shut up." Once everyone was quiet, I spoke again, "Yes we are together. We have been for about 9 months. We kept our same dislike or barely friend act so we could keep it between us for a while. We needed to work out how we worked together after actually not liking each other for a long time. It was nice in our little bubble. And before you ask, no I wasn't not coping with the different room assignments because of it, my routine changed suddenly and my brain didn't like that. That should answer your questions, can I shower now?"

They looked at us in disbelief before I just walked away knowing we would be hit with more questions later. Tierna pecked my lips before going to her own shower, "That was hot. Don't make a habit of it though, you don't need to be getting in trouble. Also thank you for answering all those questions. I do not have the energy right now."

Before Tierna could actually get into the shower, I grabbed her arm, pulling her back into me. Now that she had taken her shirt off, I finally had the chance to make sure she was truly okay. My hands ran along her sides and up her back before hugging her tightly, "I've never done anything like that before. I just, I saw you go down and I snapped. Seeing you hurt, well it worried me in a way I've never felt before. You sure you're okay?"

"This side of you is adorable. I've never seen you so worried before. I'm okay, I promise. There might be a bruise or two, but I'm okay."

"What can I say? I've never been in love like this before. I always worry about you T, but seeing you down is a whole different type of worry. I love you."

"And I love you."

#uswnt x reader #uswnt imagine #woso x reader #woso imagines #tierna davidson imagine #tierna davidson x reader

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writtenbymisunderstoodnerds · 26 days

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Man I love this series!

someone who loves you wouldn't do this

the fourth and final chapter of family line solstråle faces some more challenges and makes some important decisions. angst. like angst... but then fluff :) cw: more of the same... poor mental health on sol's part.

it must be said that this chapter would be absolutely NOTHING compared to what it is now without @wileys-russo. for every comment you leave on this, YOU BEST leave bailey something telling her thank you, too :)

------

“Solstråle… that is just… wood. Your bed would just be on some wooden slats on the ground.”

You beamed at your sister. “I KNOW. It’s so cool. It’s like camping. But with a comfy mattress, and it’s oversized, so I don't need a nightstand, it’s like a built-in shelf! It'll go so well with my new map because the wood is the same as the frame and…”

Ingrid didn’t need to hear your reasoning; the excitement on your face was more than enough for her. She would have bought you anything, no matter how hideous, just to keep seeing this joy on your face. This alleged bed frame wasn’t even that bad; it was woodsy and earthy and the precise thing you loved.

The bed frame was the final thing you’d needed. Ingrid had come in with a gameplan, because of course she had, and you had systematically made your way through the store.

You’d seemed unsure at first, and very hesitant to really pick anything out. Mapi, meanwhile, was too excited to see that she was overwhelming you. After the 8th time you’d said the words, “I don’t know, do you like it?” your sister knew she had to step in.

Mapi was busy talking your ear off. “OOO what about this dresser? With the matching mirror? Or we could get the other mirror with this dresser and paint the wood framing so it would match. Or we could get-”

Ingrid cut her off. “María, darling, I love you, but take a breath.” You watched amused as Mapi literally took a deep breath at Ingrid’s instruction. “Okay, now go pick out a couple new mugs over there and then come back.”

Mapi nodded enthusiastically, bounding off towards the mugs. “Do not run, María Pilar!” Ingrid shouted after her, smiling to herself when Mapi slowed down to an awkward shuffle.

Your sister turned to you then, a sympathetic look on her face as you regarded her cautiously.

“Which dresser do you want?”

“I don’t-”

“No. Which dresser do you want?” Ingrid insisted.

You shrugged, looking away from your sister, and inexplicably starting to tear up. You didn't want to pick the wrong thing, and you didn’t want to make anyone buy anything for you.

The brunette put her hands on your shoulders, looking down at you insistently. “Listen, Solstråle. I want you to have a space that is yours, with things you pick, and things you like. Let me do this for you? Please?”

You sighed, nodding slowly. “I like that one.” You said softly, pointing at one of the dressers Mapi hadn’t even glanced at.

“Good.” Ingrid said. “MARÍA, come here.”

Mapi returned like a puppy being called back to its owner, with a single mug in her hands. Ingrid had been about to scold her, and tell her to stop hijacking your shopping trip, when Mapi handed out the mug towards you. You took it into your hands, turning it around until the design was facing you.

It was a ceramic mug, painted with a minimalist map of Spain. There was only one marking on the map, signifying Barcelona. It was a little sun, right on the coast, marking your new home.

“Get it? It’s a map. Like the one I got you. And it has a sun. Mapi and Solstråle. Un mapa y el sol.” She joked, clearly thinking you’d laugh, and put the mug back, as it wasn’t normally the sort of thing you’d like.

You grinned at her, though, looking between the Spaniard and your sister, who also had a big smile on her face. “Can I get it?” You asked.

Mapi looked surprised, but Ingrid just kept smiling, knowing instantly that the silly mug meant something because Mapi had seen it, and thought of you. “Of course. María, she picked out a dresser.”

“Which one?” Mapi asked, looking around excitedly.

You’d laughed, shaking your head, and pointing at the one you wanted. Ingrid was a little worried Mapi would jokingly complain that you hadn’t picked one of the ones’ she’d pointed out, and inadvertently make you feel guilty, but Mapi just nodded enthusiastically.

“Oh I didn’t see that one! Good call pequeña!”

You’d looked relieved, Ingrid felt relieved, and Mapi was just happy to be there.

-------

You couldn’t sleep. It felt dumb, laying in your new bed, in your redecorated room, but your mind just wouldn’t turn off. You’d spent the day with Ingrid and Mapi, and they’d done everything right. Everything. Your room felt like your room, now, not just the guest room. Their home felt like your home.

And yet. You were still empty. It wasn’t enough. You weren’t convinced. It didn’t make any fucking sense, because they’d gone out of their way, over and over, to show you that they loved you. That seemed like something that couldn’t be reality, though. You weren’t… loveable. How could you be? You were just you. And that had never been enough, no matter how badly you wanted it to be.

You couldn’t stand laying in bed any longer. It was too soft, too comfortable. It felt too safe, like everything was about to be ripped away from you. The living room was safer. It was so viscerally Ingrid and Mapi’s space. You didn’t have anything to lose down here.

You turned the TV on, appreciating the array of Norwegian options Ingrid was subscribed to, and put on a mindless one. You sat and watched, and tried not to think. You weren’t very successful if the way you jumped when the couch moved next to you was any indication.

“Can’t sleep?” Mapi asked, tucking herself under the blanket you were using.

“Nope.”

“Thinking about how much better you’d sleep in that race car bed we saw? That’s why I'm up.” Mapi replied wistfully, causing you to crack a smile.

“Something like that.” You replied softly. The defender studied you for a moment, before throwing an arm around your shoulder, contact you leaned into, almost on instinct.

A scene came on in the drama that was playing, one which took place in a tattoo shop. Mapi perked up, and you saw an opening to change the subject before your mood could be questioned.

“How old were you when you got your first tattoo?” You questioned.

“18. It was this one.” Mapi said excitedly, holding out her arm to point at the partially covered up tattoo. “I covered it kind of a couple years later. Would you ever get a tattoo?”

You weren’t a bad liar, but for some reason, you didn’t feel like lying to Mapi. She felt like a judgment free zone, in a way your sister didn’t. “I have one.”

Mapi looked at you in surprise. “You do? Where? What is it? When did you get it? How did you get it?” The law in Barcelona was that you could get one at 16 without parental consent, but Mapi hadn’t known when you would have done it.

You laughed at her rapid fire questions. “I got it in Norway. It was a stick and poke, I don’t even remember getting it, I was blacked out.”

Mapi tried to school her features, but you could sense her disapproval anyway. It wasn’t for the reason you expected, though. “Someone gave you a stick and poke while you were blacked out?” She asked evenly.

You just shrugged. “I asked for it, apparently.”

It was quiet for a moment while the defender tried to act like that didn’t upset her.

“What is it?” You blushed, then, and Mapi cracked a smile. “Tell me, tell me. I won’t tell your sister.”

Instead of telling, you showed her, pulling your shirt up so your rib was exposed.

So the 23 clearly inked into your skin was visible.

Mapi’s touch was delicate when she traced over it, a small smile on her lips.

“23, huh?”

You shrugged. “It was the only thing I asked for, apparently. I couldn’t remember the number, I was so drunk, but I made someone google what it was, and then… got it.”

“That’s really sweet.” Mapi said quietly.

“Hope she doesn’t change her number.” You said quickly, trying not to linger on the sentimentality of it all.

“Eh. You can always turn it into something else. Tattoo cover ups aren’t that expensive.” Mapi said casually, knowing exactly who was just a few steps from the family room. Sue her if she wanted to see Ingrid’s reaction to your tattoo.

“Tattoo? TATTOO? You have a tattoo, solstråle?” Ingrid asked, practically falling into the room. You tensed, suddenly terrified that this would be it. She’d make you leave after this. But while ingrid looked a little stern, she didn't seem angry. Still, you were a bit frozen still, and Mapi took her opportunity.

“Stick and poke. Got it while blackout drunk.” She said, holding up a hand for you to high five, despite clearly disapproving minutes earlier. Apparently, Mapi only needed to be a protective adult in Ingrid’s absence. You high fived her, allowing yourself to smile a bit, though you shot your sister a nervous glance.

Ingrid pinched the bridge of her nose between two fingers, sighing heavily and sitting on the couch.

“Alright. Let me see it.” You sat up to lift the side of your shirt again, stopping when she threw a hand over her eyes. “Wait, no. Is it bad? Is it a bad word? Is it a vagina?” You and Mapi collapsed into giggles, and Ingrid rolled her eyes, removing her hand from her face. “Oh grow up, both of you. Let me see, solstråle.”

A bit smugly, now, you showed her the tattoo, watching carefully as her face morphed from apprehension, to surprise, to… emotion. Ingrid was tearing up.

“Oh my god, don’t cry, please, Ingrid,” you begged, sitting up and looking at your sister anxiously. Mapi was shaking with silent laughter next to you, and Ingrid was waving her hands in front of her face frantically.

“I’m not crying, I’m not. I’m just- tattoos are bad. Really bad. You shouldn’t have that. Tattoo. Of my number. On your body forever. My baby sister,” She trailed off, biting her lip when it began to tremble.

“Ingrid,” you complained, looking away uncomfortably.

“Ven aqui, princesa,” Mapi said quietly, pulling Ingrid into her side, though she was still smiling. Ingrid took a few calming breaths resting against her girlfriend, staying silent even though she had a million things to say. Her girlfriend took the opportunity to break the ice, seeing as though you looked to be on the verge of bolting out of the room. “ You know what would look good, solstråle? A 4, on the other side.” She suggested with a grin.

Ingrid sat bolt upright. “NO! No more tattoos. María, I swear to god.”

Mapi laughed, throwing her hands up in the air. “I’m just kidding, princesa, relax! God you sound like Alexia when I joked that I was going to tattoo Fresa when she was 12. I thought Ale was going to hit me.”

“I might hit you.” Ingrid mumbled, crossing her arms over her chest, glaring at her girlfriend.

“Nah. I’m too hot for that.” Mapi said confidently, leaning in to kiss her girlfriend’s cheek. Ingrid fought a smile and you turned away with a grimace on your face.

“Well. I’m going to bed. Please, keep the volume down, I don’t wish to be scarred this evening.” You said, walking briskly out of the room, ignoring Mapi’s cackle, and Ingrid’s gasp.

“We don’t have sex! We don’t! Abstinence is key!” Ingrid shouted after you, sighing heavily when she heard you laugh from the stairs. She turned to Mapi with a defeated look on her face.

“Nicely done, princesa.” Mapi teased.

Ingrid groaned, collapsing against her girlfriend. “She laughed a lot today. Like really laughed.” Ingrid commented after a minute.

Mapi ran her fingers through Ingrid’s loose hair. “I know. It was nice. She’s making progress, mi amor. You’re doing really well.”

Ingrid smiled shyly into the Spaniard, privately thinking that she’d do a lot worse without Mapi around to help. It takes a village, she supposed.

-------

You hadn’t quite drifted off when you heard your bedroom door open quietly. You were half asleep, too sleepy to open your eyes, assuming that either Ingrid or Mapi were putting something in your room you’d forgotten downstairs. You cracked an eye open after a second when you heard a noise closer to your bed, and saw your sister picking up Snø, who had fallen off your bed. She turned towards you, and for some reason, you shut your eyes before she could see they were open.

You pretended to be asleep. You weren’t sure why.

You were glad you had, though, when you felt Snø placed just next to your face, felt the covers pulled up a little until they were just under your chin, and felt Ingrid press a soft kiss to your forehead.

“God natt solstråle, jeg elsker deg,” she whispered, before quietly creeping back out of the room.

You were wide awake now, opening your eyes as soon as you heard the door shut. You weren’t quite sure what you were so upset about. Ingrid tucking you in had felt safe and loving and warm. Those were all good feelings… so why did it feel like a part of your chest was caving in on itself?

It was just… where had Ingrid learned to do that? You couldn’t, for the life of you, remember your parents doing anything similar with you. Even when you were young, putting you to bed consisted of them standing in the doorway while you got under the covers, and them bidding you a goodnight. Had it not been like that for Ingrid?

The more you thought about it, the more obvious it seemed. Of course it hadn’t been like that for Ingrid. She had been intentional, wanted. She was their favorite. They loved Ingrid in a way they never loved you. Of course they tucked her in, and kissed her forehead, and told her they loved her. Words you hadn’t heard from either of them in a long time. Ingrid got everything you always craved, and you couldn’t even really be that mad about it. Because if anyone deserved the absolute best the world had to offer, it was your sister.

You cried yourself to sleep that night, quietly muffling your sobs in your pillow. It was a sadness that plagued you, mixed with hope. Your parents didn’t love you, you were pretty sure of that. But it seemed like, maybe, Ingrid did.

-------

The following day was a match day. Well, not for Mapi, obviously, but it was an important league match for the team, and for Ingrid, and you were actually looking forward to going.

You woke up well rested in your bedroom, warm sunlight streaming in through the cracks in the blinds. You looked around when you woke up, a bit confused at the transformation it had undergone. It was cozy, and you relished laying in bed for a bit, not in any rush to leave this newly comforting space. It felt like home, and thought that still scared you, it wasn’t as terrifying in the daylight. Everything was always better in the morning.

And though the morning was good, the afternoon only went downhill.

You’d disappeared up to your room to get some homework done before you were set to leave for the game, and Mapi and Ingrid were lounging downstairs, watching a WSL match. Ingrid was ignoring the repetitive texts from her mother. After another one buzzed her phone, quickly followed by a sharp ring as her mom resorted to calling her, Ingrid flipped her phone over with a heavy sigh, turning to hide her face in the crook of Mapi’s neck. The Spaniard frowned sadly, wrapping her arms tight around the Norwegian, softly rubbing her back.

“I love you.” Mapi whispered, not really sure what to say, but figuring that those words couldn’t hurt. Ingrid whispered them back, feeling a bit braver now, before pulling away and reaching for her phone again.

“I don’t know what to say to her. I don’t want to talk to her right now, but she can tell something is wrong. I never ignore her like this.”

“You’re not ready to talk. Just say that.” Mapi suggested. Ingrid thought for a few moments, before slowly nodding and beginning to type a response.

Please stop calling. I am focused on Solstråle right now. You’ve really hurt her, and neither of us are ready to talk to you yet. Please respect that.

Ingrid showed Mapi before hitting send, an apprehensive look on her face.

“Perfect, amor.” Mapi assured her, watching as Ingrid hit send and snuggled back up against her girlfriend. She felt the words more than she heard them when Mapi spoke into her ear. “I am proud of you. You’re doing the right thing for your sister, and I know it’s hard, but you’re doing so well, mi princesa. I’m so proud of you.”

Ingrid blushed heavily, but smiled to herself. She wasn't sure why, but it suddenly felt like things might be okay from here on out. She would be wrong.

-------

You shouldn’t have answered the phone. You should have known better. You couldn't help the hope that bloomed inside of you when you saw your mom’s name on the caller ID as your phone rang, though. You answered the phone.

“You’re ruining our family.” She ruined it first.

“You’ve made my daughter hate me.” You’re her daughter too.

“Ingrid doesn’t want you there. She’s not your parent, I am.” Ingrid says she wants you here. And Ingrid acts more like a parent than she ever has.

“If I'd known how much trouble you’d be, I wouldn’t have bothered with having you.” Sometimes you wish she hadn’t bothered with it.

“You cause more trouble than you’re worth, and one day Ingrid will see that. And I won’t be here to take you back.” You were a lot of trouble, weren’t you? Your mom was right. One day, Ingrid and Mapi would reach the point she had. And you’d have nowhere else to go.

Your thoughts only spiraled from there. You hung up the phone without saying a word, letting it fall to the ground. You curled into yourself and thought. Thought hard. Until your mind felt like a prison you were locked in, and you weren’t sure how to get out. Until the room disappeared around you, and all you felt was hatred. Not towards your mother. But towards yourself.

-------

You wouldn’t look at Mapi. You wouldn’t move. You didn’t even really seem to know she was there. You sat with your knees pulled to your chest on the floor by your bed, a vacant look in your eyes.

“Come on, pequeña, come back. I’m right here, you’re safe.” Mapi said softly, careful not to touch you. She’d come to ask you if you’d be ready to go in an hour, wanting to leave at the same time as Ingrid and spend time with the team as they got ready in the locker room. She’d found you like this, making yourself as small as possible against your bed. You looked tiny, and Mapi spoke quietly, delicately, trying to coax you back to her.

Still, even her soothing words didn’t bring you out. And she knew she needed to get Ingrid, even as she knew that Ingrid would freak out.

She stepped away from you, leaning into the hall and calling quietly towards her room, where your sister was.

“Ingrid, come here please.” She said, as calmly as she could. Ingrid appeared in the hall, walking towards your room as she fiddled with the braid in her hair.

“What’s up?” She asked, following Mapi into your room. “Solstråle?” She looked between you and her girlfriend in confusion.

“I think she’s a little out of it right now. I’m not sure what happened, I found her like this.” Mapi explained, trying her best to not make Ingrid panic.

Ingrid sat down next to you, grabbing your hand. When you didn’t even flinch, she looked at Mapi in horror.

“María, what do we do?”

“She’s all right, amor. She just needs a bit.” Mapi reassured, sitting down on your other side.

“I… I don’t understand, what happened?”

“I don’t know, mi amor. Something probably upset her. She’s very vulnerable right now.” Mapi replied, before pausing briefly. “Do you remember when I withdrew from camp for the first time? I got like this. I was okay, I just needed some time, and my brain was trying to protect itself. Solstråle is okay, she just needs the same.”

Ingrid nodded slowly, because she did remember. That was different, though, that was… a traumatic experience for her girlfriend. And whatever was happening with you right now, this couldn’t be a reaction to a traumatic experience. Yes, you were struggling, and yes, the last couple years had been hard, but you weren’t… traumatized?

As Ingrid sat and waited for you to come back to her, though, she realized that you were. If she put herself in your position, she couldn’t see how you could have come out of everything not traumatized. The marks your parents had left on you ran deeper than Ingrid had realized. And there wasn’t anything she could do to fix them unless you let her.

“María,” Ingrid said quietly, a desperate plea for some reassurance as minutes passed and nothing changed, as she stared into your eyes and you didn't react.

“I know, cariño, but she’s okay. She’s okay, I promise. Just try to stay calm.”

Ingrid wasn’t sure how much longer she could stay calm. Especially when she glanced at her phone and saw it was several minutes past the time she was supposed to leave for the match. “Can you call Ale? And tell her I can’t come?”

Mapi was nodding before Ingrid finished her sentence, standing and stepping out of the room. The phone only rang once before Alexia picked up, her reassuring voice calming Mapi, who was pretending to be a lot less panicked than she felt.

“Hola.”

“Ingrid and I can’t come.” Mapi said simply.

“What’s going on? Are you both okay?” Alexia asked with concern. Ingrid wouldn’t just miss a match she was supposed to be starting. Not unless something was wrong.

“It’s her sister, she’s not… well right now. We have to stay here with her. Ale, I’m really sorry,” Mapi said, cutting herself off before she got choked up. She wasn’t an emotional person but seeing you like this, seeing Ingrid so upset, and hearing her best friend’s voice over the phone… she couldn’t help it.

“No, don’t be sorry. Family first, always. I’ll talk to Jona. Do you need anything? Can I help?” Alexia asked. Hearing Mapi cry was always unsettling, because it happened so rarely.

“No, we’ve got it. Thank you, Ale, really.” Mapi said back, clearing her throat.

They said goodbye, and Mapi walked back into the room, raising her eyebrows when she saw Ingrid on your phone.

“She talked to Mom. Like 20 minutes ago, she answered a call from Mom.” Ingrid stated. “Could that…”

Mapi took her spot back next to you, absentmindedly taking your hand in hers. You gave it the faintest of squeezes, but the Spaniard didn’t want to put any pressure on you, so she said nothing. “It could be that. It makes sense. A lot of this seems to have to do with your mom. I don’t know what she said on the phone, but… it probably wasn’t good.”

Ingrid sat with that information for a bit, startling slightly when you slumped into her. Carefully, she lowered you so your head was in her lap. You seemed a little more aware, now, but still nowhere near normal. Softly, she began to pull your hair out of the braid it was in, combing it back away from your face.

“Our Mom did this to her.” She said evenly. Mapi rested her chin on Ingrid’s shoulder, nodding slightly. “I am never letting that woman near Solstråle again. I don’t care what I have to do. She’s been hurt enough. I won’t let her be hurt anymore.”

It didn’t matter that Mapi had come to this conclusion a couple days ago. It mattered that Ingrid was there now, and Ingrid was going to keep you safe.

You heard what Ingrid said. Your ears still worked, you were just a bit… out of it. You heard what she had told her girlfriend. And as she sat above you, relaxing you with every touch of her fingers to your scalp, you knew that you were failing at the rules you’d set yourself years ago.

Don’t get attached. Don’t expect anything from anyone. Don’t get your hopes up. Don’t listen when people tell you they love you; they almost never mean it.

You were trusting, again. Just a little bit, piece by piece, and you knew that it would take time before you healed fully, before you trusted fully. Very quickly, though, you were losing the will to be independent, losing the will to be strong. You didn’t want to have to be strong anymore. And you were beginning to think you didn’t need to be.

Of course, healing isn’t linear. Nothing is that easy. So even as you slowly sat up off your sister, and inquired as to why she wasn’t at her game, some part of you knew something else would go wrong. It had happened too many times for you not to know any better. There was still a hesitation when you leaned into the hug your sister offered, as she explained that you were more important than football. There was still hesitation when she asked what had happened. You told her the fewest details possible, which she clearly wasn’t happy with. You were still holding yourself back, somewhere in the middle of healed and broken. It was almost a race to see who could get to you first. It would either be Mapi and Ingrid to reach you, to put you back together. Or it would be the trauma and pain that pulled you backwards, back to the version of yourself you hated. Breaking you for good.

------

The answer would come in the form of a knock on the front door, later that day. After you’d gotten up off the floor of your bedroom, and returned to pretending to be okay. You were in the garage with Mapi, working on the bike, while Ingrid cooked dinner. You were loosening up a bit, and Mapi could tell you were getting closer to telling her what your mom had said on the phone.

Your sister answered the door, thinking maybe it would be one of their teammates, coming to check on them after her rather abrupt withdrawal from the match.

When Ingrid opened the door, though, it wasn’t her teammate on the front porch. It was your father.

-------

Your father, who was significantly less at fault than your mom, but still complicit in how you’d been treated. Your father, who always worked too much to really have a say in anything regarding your life. Your father, who you’d always felt closer to, always trusted more.

Your father, who loved you more than he’d ever admit.

Ingrid knew what he was there for the minute she saw his face. She was proven right when she got you and Mapi from the garage and brought you into the family room. When he began to talk and explain what he wanted, began to try to convince you to come home.

“I know Mom messed up. We both have, really. Our home isn’t the same without you though, Solstråle. I officially retired yesterday, which is why I wasn’t here sooner. I want to make things right. We weren’t good parents, but I’m here now, my darling. I want you to come back home. We can fix things with your mom. We can fix things at your school, get you back with your friends. We can be a family again.”

We can be a family again. A few months ago, maybe that would have gotten you home. Maybe the temptation of your friends and Norway and the promise of being loved would have worked. Things were different now, though. You felt like you had a family here, or that you could.

You’d always had a better relationship with your Dad. He loved all the outdoorsy activities you did, and though he’d been busy with work practically your whole life, the little time you spent together was always nice. Him retiring would ensure one sane person was home with you, that it wouldn’t just be you and your mom. And maybe you would have said yes, if you hadn’t seen the fear in Ingrid’s eyes, and decided it was because she wanted you to stay. She wanted you here, you told yourself. You wanted to be where you were wanted. And that wasn’t Norway, not with your mom.

“No.” you said simply.

“Solstråle,” your father began, with an exasperated sigh.

“No. I appreciate you coming here, and I appreciate you caring but it’s too late. It’s not enough, and it’s too late. Mom doesn’t want me home. She made that clear on the phone today. I don’t want to be where I’m not wanted. I don’t want to go back to Norway.”

Next to you, Mapi, who had been silent this whole time, squeezed your shoulder reassuringly.

Your Dad shifted uncomfortably in his seat. You got the idea he thought this would be easier, which made sense. You hadn’t put up any fight when they’d sent you to Spain, and your Dad hadn’t expected any fight now.

“Take a day or two. Think about it. For me?”

Ingrid and Mapi wanted to snap that you didn’t owe him anything and he was in no place to ask you for anything, but they didn’t want to cause any more conflict than was necessary. Besides, you could handle yourself.

“I’ve made my decision but if you want to hear me repeat myself in two days, that’s fine.” You said calmly. Ingrid bit back a laugh, but Mapi smiled openly.

Your Dad didn’t seem phased, to his credit. “I’d like to talk to you both. Alone.” He directed that at the older girls, and you took the opportunity to flee upstairs, far away from the man that was… doing nothing but confusing you about your feelings towards your parents.

Your Dad didn’t stay for much longer, giving your sister a little speech about encouraging you to “make the right decision,” and why the right thing would be sending you home with him.

It left your sister with a bit to think about, her parents often making her rethink her decisions. Mapi could sense this turmoil, but she didn’t say anything, knowing Ingrid would come to her. Ingrid was completely silent as her and Mapi went to clean up the kitchen from dinner, allowing you space and time upstairs to process.

After a few minutes, though, Ingrid spoke up.

“Are you sure we’re making the right decision?” Ingrid asked, turning to Mapi as she finished putting away the dishes.

“We aren’t making a decision. Your sister is.” Mapi reasoned. “Besides, Ingrid, you said it yourself. Solstråle shouldn’t be around your mom. There are no real, tangible reasons why she shouldn’t stay here.”

“My dad had a couple.” Ingrid said skeptically.

“Okay. Why should Solstråle go back to Norway?” Mapi asked, taking a seat at the counter across from her girlfriend. Ingrid sighed, and began to list off the reasons her father had given her.

It was, of course, at this moment that you came down the stairs to fill up your water. This moment, the worst possible moment, as Ingrid tried to convince herself that you should stay, while inadvertently convincing you that she didn’t want you to stay. You froze in the hall, just out of sight, after hearing your name when Mapi asked her question. It was a miracle you stayed silent and on your feet, as every fear you still harbored about being a burden to Ingrid and Mapi was, apparently, proved to be true.

“She doesn’t have friends here. She doesn’t speak Spanish very well. We’re both busy athletes, and she is… not easy. We’d have our hands full. We are young, and we aren’t her parents. I’m her sister, not her mom. She needs help, and I’m not sure how to convince her to get it. My mom and dad can get her back on track better than I can.”

Ingrid was simply restating what her father had said. None of it she agreed with, none of it felt true. You didn’t hear her tell Mapi that, though. No, you quietly crept back upstairs, and sat on your bed numbly. Your stupid bed that she’d bought for you. In the stupid room she’d redecorated. With the absurd presents she’d gotten you. All of it wasn’t true. All of it was a lie. She didn’t want you here, how could you have ever let yourself be convinced that she did? Just like that, with only a few sentences overheard, every ounce of trust you’d begun to place in your sister had evaporated. They were downstairs, talking about how they didn’t want you, after spending so long lying and saying they did.

It should have been confusing, this contradiction. But it wasn’t, because you’d spent your whole life feeling unwanted. And what is a few days of being told something against 18 years of being told something the complete opposite? Your mom had been right. Ingrid had come to her senses. You weren’t wanted here. Your Dad said he wanted to fix things, and though that was hardly believable to you, you’d go back. Maybe you weren’t wanted anywhere, but you’d go back to Norway, where no one cared what you did as long as you didn’t get in trouble. You supposed they didn’t really care here, either, they’d just been pretending to. It had all been an act, probably to spare your feelings, but an act nonetheless. You ignored that it didn’t make sense. You pretended that the complete contradictions in what they’d been telling you and how they’d been acting didn’t exist. Because you’d rather convince yourself then be convinced by them. You’d rather hurt yourself than let them hurt you first. You’d take the first step. You’d make it easy, and you’d go.

Very suddenly, you couldn’t stand to be in this house, this room for a second longer. You pulled out your phone, and told your dad you’d reconsidered. You took a few calming breaths, preparing yourself to rid your sister of the burden that was taking care of you, apparently. You shouldn’t be surprised by this. You'd been right, the whole time, to not trust her when she said she wanted you here. She didn’t. Of course she didn’t.

Doubt swirlied around in your head. Nothing made sense, nothing made any sense. There had always been one constant in your life, though. And that was being unwanted. Ingrid didn’t want you. Ingrid couldn’t want you. It was too good to be true.

You stomped down the stairs, hearing Ingrid and Mapi’s voices grow quiet upon your approach. You assumed they’d been talking about you, and they had. About finding you a therapist. Not about wanting you to go.

You entered the kitchen, startling both girls with the hard look on your face. “I’m going back to Norway.” You asked, voice monotone, but shaking dangerously as you regarded your sister and her girlfriend.

“What?” Ingrid asked, thinking she must have misheard you.

“I am going back to Norway. I texted Dad.” You turned to leave, but Mapi grabbed your wrist, spinning you back around.

“What the hell are you talking about?” She asked. You could only glare at her.

“You said you wanted to stay, solstråle, I don’t understand…” Ingrid said, trailing off.

“You don’t want me here, Ingrid, and I don’t want to be here.”

“Of course we want you here,” Ingrid began, growing more and more confused with each venomous word that you spewed at her.

You wrenched your arm out of Mapi’s grasp and stepped towards your sister, your outstretched hand connected with her chest as you shoved her backwards.

“Oye!” Mapi shouted, getting in between the two of you. You were beside yourself with rage, suddenly. Why had she lied? Why had she gotten your hopes up?

“No. You. Don’t. Stop lying, both of you.” You pushed Mapi away from you then, ignoring the angry tears that had begun to well in your eyes. “You don’t want me here, you think I’d do better in Norway. I don’t speak Spanish, I don’t have any friends, I’m too much work, you are young and you don’t need a teenager to take care of. I’m mean and quiet and stubborn and my own fucking mother doesn’t love me. I heard you earlier Ingrid, you don’t need to lie. I’m used to it. You don’t want me. Stop pretending you do.”

At some point during your speech, Mapi and Ingrid understood what had happened. You’d overheard something out of context, clearly. And it was evident that you’d reverted back to your original belief that they didn’t want you. It hurt them, how easily you’d been convinced. And suddenly, they weren’t confused and they weren’t angry that you’d pushed them. Their faces softened, and they inched closer to you and you hated it. Because everything inside of you was screaming to believe what you knew what they were about to say, to let yourself fall into their arms, for good this time. To trust them.

You couldn’t. You couldn’t be hurt again. It would kill you.

You stepped backwards, and both girls stopped moving. It was Ingrid that spoke first, her voice low and soothing.

“Solstråle, I don’t believe any of that. Dad said all that, to try to convince us to let you go back to Norway. We want you here. I know it’s hard for you to believe us, honey, but we do. More than anything, we want you to stay.”

You shook your head frantically, teardrops hitting the floor under you. “No. No.”

Mapi nodded, stepping a bit closer. “Yes, mi sol. We want you here. We love you, and we want you to stay.”

“No, stop!” You shouted. Ingrid was crying now, and you tried not to care. “You don’t mean that, you can’t mean that. Please, stop lying, this is too confusing, and it hurts too much, please. Just let me go.”

You didn’t mean you wanted them to let you go back to Norway. You wanted them to let you go. The tension in the air thickened at this, as both of them realized what you meant.

“No. I won’t do that. You’re staying here, with me. Here, where you are loved, and wanted. You’re not going anywhere, you aren’t allowed to.” Ingrid said, carelessly wiping a tear off her cheek as she stepped closer to you.

Mapi stepped closer, too. “Nena, I promise you. On everything I love. On my parents, on football, on Ingrid. I want you to stay. Please.” The emotion in the defender’s voice startled you, and very suddenly, all of the fight had gone out of you, all of the anger.

You wiped your eyes like a child. Because really, that was the part of you crying. “Why?” You cried. “Why do you want me? No one wants me.”

Mapi shook her head, for once at a loss for what to say, as Ingrid let out a rough sob at your words. “How could we not? You’re my baby sister, Solstråle. You are kind, funny, and caring. You’re a good person, honey. You are good, and we love you.”

It was quiet as you heaved in a few breaths, looking between both girls as you tried to decide what was true and what was false. And, ultimately, when you made your decision, it was because you were too tired to do anything else. Too exhausted of hating yourself to continue punishing yourself. Too exhausted of not letting yourself believe that you were worthy of love. Because you craved it, so deeply inside of you. And as much as you didn’t want to, and as much as you wished you didn’t care, you did.

You are good, Ingrid had said. And if you were good, you could let yourself be loved.

“Do you promise?” You asked, your voice cracking at the same time Ingrid and Mapi felt their hearts break for the 10th time today, at how completely disbelieving you sounded.

“I promise.” Ingrid said. You looked between her and Mapi silently, and Ingrid took a hesitant step towards you, before Mapi pulled her back, shaking her head slightly. You needed to go to them. You needed to decide, all by yourself.

It was the desperation in your sister’s voice that really got you, the tears in her eyes. And maybe it was also the desperation inside yourself, too, and the ache in your heart that you knew you didn’t need to carry anymore. You wrapped your arms tight around your abdomen, and prepared yourself to say the most vulnerable, most terrifying words you had ever said, and might ever say.

“I want to stay with you guys.”

The words were barely out of your mouth before you were being squished into Ingrid’s arms, Mapi’s quickly following. Both of them hugged you tight, giving you the comfort you had been trying to give yourself. You didn’t need to do that, anymore. They would do it for you.

You wouldn’t have to do any of the things you’d spent a long time doing alone, alone anymore.

It had been years and years of wishing you had a family that loved you, thinking you’d give anything for a family that cared about you again. It turned out you didn’t need to give anything. You could just… have it. You just deserved it.

-------

def not the end of my girl sol ☀️ we'll see more of her... soon ish :)

hope everyone enjoyed this little series <3 I love and appreciate you all very much

also... i was 🤏 this close to leaving part 4 on a cliffhanger where mr. engen shows up but the second part wouldn't have been long enough and i am much too nice

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writtenbymisunderstoodnerds · 1 month

Text

Love this!

First Impressions

Alexia comes off as quite strict when you first meet her - it puts you off despite her trying her best to flirt with you in her own way

The ‘Alexia is incredibly awkward and unable to handle her emotions’ agenda continues because this is basically Alexia flirting with reader for 20 paragraphs straight while you think she hates you because she’s horrible at flirting 🥰🥰

It’s mostly fluff despite the summary!! and has a happy ending ofc

The first time you meet Alexia she’s stressed out, nervous about the game and determined to win it since Barça had only achieved a draw last time and almost lost. It’s definitely not the best time to be introduced to someone but Lucy insists, certain that you and Alexia would get along well and hoping that it might finally convince you to sign for Barcelona.

Alexia isn’t outright rude but it’s clear that she’s got other things on her mind and the way she barely squeezes your hand before she’s telling Lucy to get her head in the game instead of talking with friends makes you feel incredibly awkward. She does give you a quite intense mustering look though, her eyes trailing over you and you can’t help but feel as if she just judged you. Maybe it’s because you aren’t wearing a Barça shirt like basically the whole stadium. But you were signed for a different team right now so you couldn’t just show up in someone else’s kit.

You try to shake the very short interaction off, focusing on the game and only internally cheering them on. Barcelona had made quite a few offers for you over the years, though you had never seen any reason to leave your club so far. Now you really do think you’re slowly outgrowing it though, frustrated with your teammates performances that seem to just keep dwindling and the management that doesn’t bring any new tactics.

It’s one of the reasons you’re here, to see how the team is and how they all interact. And you can’t deny that it’s impressive: everyone knows exactly where to be, most of the game is played solely in the other team’s half where they try desperately to keep Barça from scoring. It doesn’t really work and the end result of 3:0 for Barcelona isn’t surprising - but incredibly impressive considering they had struggled the first time they had played this specific team. It shows how quickly they can adapt if needed and definitely does leave a lingering impact on you.

Your transfer had been a long time coming and so it isn’t a huge surprise to your fans when you announce it. You’ve signed for Barcelona. Apart from a few disgruntled comments most seem to be glad that you’re switching to a different team, it was visible to everyone that your old one was not putting in enough effort anymore. Lucy and Keira are both delighted, the two of them - especially Lucy - had been very intent on getting you to come to their team for some time now, certain that Barça would give you some new challenges.

The welcome at Barcelona is warm, everyone is nice though they are all quite chatty - especially the half brunette half blonde haired woman who introduces herself as Mapi and takes it upon herself to guide you around everywhere. She explains that Alexia is too busy right now - since it’s usually more of the Captains task to make new players welcome - and therefore she’ll do it.

Alexia really does seem to be extremely busy because the first time you actually see the blonde woman again is at the first training session - and she’s not much warmer towards you than she was back then when you met at the match. She gives you a handshake again - unlike everyone else who pulled you into a hug - her hazel eyes once again wandering over your body as you try your hardest not to squirm under her intense gaze. She looks displeased for some reason? You try to tell yourself it’s just because the sun is so bright and she’s blinded by it but the feeling that Alexia doesn’t like you stays with you the entire day. While everyone else is happily talking to you and doing their best to get to know you, she’s lingering on the sides of the group - apparently not even listening to what your answers to the countless questions are as she’s more interested in looking up the plans for upcoming matches. It really shouldn’t matter, she doesn’t owe you anything and the rest of the team is incredibly sweet. But still, you can’t help but let it bother you, hoping that she might warm up to you over time if you just try to get to know her better.

You’re determined at first, always saying hi to her and doing your best to talk and answer anything you can in Spanish, hoping Alexia might just be unwilling to talk in English like most of the Spanish girls on your new team. You’re also always the first by her side to remove some equipment after training, even though the strong midfielder looks like she can easily carry it herself. If possible you partner up with her, putting on your best poker face while you do the drills absolutely perfect over and over again despite your muscles feeling like they’re going up in flames - trying to impress the woman next to you. Alexia does not look moved in the slightest though and when you watch her complete the exercises you can’t help but feel like you’ve still got a lot of work to do because she doesn’t even seem a bit tired, her strong muscles moving effortlessly under smooth skin as she dribbles the ball around the hurdles in record time or does her twenty pushups.

Over the next few weeks you really try not to give up. The friendships that you build with the others grow stronger and steadier with every day, they all make a true effort to invite you and include you and are patient with you as you stumble through some of the rapid spanish conversations - someone always willing to translate and tell the others to slow down.

Meanwhile Alexia seems to slowly develop a personal issue with you. You thought you had started to finally build a bond with the blonde woman since she starts to seek you out in order to partner up with you. Though that was apparently only because you’re that horrendous at playing - at least judging by the constant corrections she makes when you play. It doesn’t matter how perfect you’ve shot the ball and that it hit the net so far out of reach of Cata’s hands that the young goalkeeper truly couldn’t have saved it even if she had wings - Alexia still corrects you. Telling you to shoot faster and harder and more or that you shouldn’t have risked taking the shot and instead passed to someone else who was free or that your shot was lucky or that your pass was weak even though it arrived perfectly at Keira’s foot.

Alexia is generous with her critic towards everyone - including herself to be completely fair. But you can’t help but notice that she seems to pay special attention to you, her eyes always on you as she apparently just waits for you to make a mistake. It puts you on edge and makes you nervous to shoot - which in turn just eggs her on more. What started with her sometimes correcting you turns into full blown lectures because you now hesitate to try and score, feeling safer with just quickly passing the ball to Aitana and letting her take the brunt if she doesn’t score. Alexia is never that harsh with her critic on her anyway, something that just makes it more apparent that she doesn’t like you. The way she is now on your heels, shouting for you to stop passing and just score makes you even more nervous, your shots which were usually full of confidence either not taken because you just hesitate or weak because you didn’t fully commit.

It sets Alexia off even further, the critic that comes hailing from her is never truly unkind - but it is definitely harsh. She goes as far as threatening to make sure you’re benched for your club debut if you don’t get it together and stop hesitating to shoot the ball - though you’d honestly rather be sitting on the bench at this point rather than deal with messing up a shot during an actual match. You’re certain Alexia would rip your head off if you did.

Your teammates and now friends are a lot more generous with compliments but you have a hard time believing it when every single thing you’re doing in Alexia’s presence gets picked apart. What started out as her giving you criticism on your football skills turns into her also criticising your private life. It’s after training, you’re freshly showered and positively exhausted from the heat and the constant shouts from Alexia the entire day for you to shoot more and be faster and pay attention. She’s quiet now though, seemingly busy with neatly folding her stuff into her training bag while you’re talking with Mapi only a few feet away.

“Sooo, how was your date?” You hit her shoulder, annoyed that she even brought it up and especially in that volume - thankfully the changing room is almost empty and the few remaining teammates are either busy with their phone or talking to one another. Mapi had introduced you to some of her friends the past weekend, insisting that you need to get to know more people even though your days are already filled with countless meet ups with everyone. One of her friends had apparently taken interest in you, though you had let her down gently, not willing to date right now and especially not someone from a friend group you were just freshly trying to get to know. You explain it to Mapi who insists that that friend would be perfect for you and is very sweet but it doesn’t sway your opinion - something you were just about to tell Mapi when Alexia brushes past you, almost bumping into your shoulder with hers and a hissed: “Concentrate on the next match instead of going on dates, you’ve got a lot to work on” is thrown your way.

You do agree with her that you’re not playing at your best right now, too intimidated and thrown off by her constant criticism. But for her to openly say that hurts a lot deeper than you thought. Mapi is quick to assure you that Alexia is just stressed because the next game is important and she tends to get snappy but it doesn’t do much to cheer you up.

You had been determined to prove her wrong when she had first started out with her constant criticism - now though, you’re simply too upset to even want to train with Alexia anymore. Instead of partnering up with her like you used to, you hurry over to Jana or Mapi or literally anyone else. You try to drown out her comments on how you’re playing - she’s not necessarily being mean but it still stings every time you can see her open her mouth because you know it’s definitely not going to be praise. Every training lesson you make sure to keep away from the group she’s interacting with, trying to busy yourself with the way nicer people around you.

It does only do so much because you can still feel her gaze on you, the intense look in her eyes whenever you meet hers for a second is usually enough to make you shudder. You wish you could figure out what her problem with you is - maybe it really is because she doesn’t deem you good enough for Barça.

Since you still struggle a bit with confidence, Ingrid, Cata and Mapi are nice enough to offer you some extra training to build it back up. It takes a bit but without Alexia constantly in your ear talking about how your shot needs to be even stronger, it gets easier and easier to shoot and score successfully and so when Jona tells you a week later that he will put you on at halftime for your debut, you feel ready despite Alexia’s unimpressed look at the news.

You’re incredibly grateful for Mapi and her constant talking when you get ready for the match, trying your hardest not to pay any attention to Alexia who might throw you off your game. She’s critical again at warmup, telling you to do some more exercises before you stretch - apparently not convinced you’ve done enough. It makes you angry but you hope that the slight wave of emotion may make you shoot harder and better later on, so you bite your tongue and do as she says.

When you get put in at halftime it feels like your heart is about to beat out of your chest. The roar of the crowd makes it even worse and you can only hope internally that you won’t let anyone down. You don’t take the first chance to score, well aware of Alexia on the right side of you who is definitely more capable of securing a goal. She does so and you’re surprised when she comes over and gives you a hug afterwards - the first time she has ever celebrated with you.

The next time you’re close to the goal and ready to shoot there’s nobody else near you and so, deciding to just have trust in yourself, you end up trying to score yourself. The relief you feel when the ball passes the goalkeepers hands by mere inches and hits the back of the net is nothing compared to the pure euphoria when your teammates start gathering around you to celebrate. You’re happy and relaxed, trying purposefully to concentrate on Ingrid who is gratulating you with a bright grin instead of the intense gaze of Alexia on your other side. You can feel her hands on your shoulder, the slight squeeze she gives you as you’re being tugged into hugs by everyone else. You wonder if she’s going to give you a hug too, like she did a few minutes ago when she scored. Before you get the chance to find out the ref warns you all to resume the match.

You’re still high off the game later on after your shower in the changing room, watching Mapi who is animatedly doing her best impression of the diving of some of the players of the other team at her - according to her - completely innocent tackles. Everyone is in a good mood, apart from Alexia. You don’t know what you expected, the blonde woman had already made clear that she wasn’t one to freely celebrate and spread joy but you had definitely thought that she’d be more happy about you guys advancing into the next round with a 3:1 win over the other team. You also had, foolishly apparently, thought that she wouldn’t have an issue with you today at least, since you had given her an assist and also scored yourself. But apparently you had done something wrong once again - if the brooding expression on her face while she looked at you was any indication.

You quickly stuffed the two kits into your bag, one was the one you had worn today and the other was one a player from the different team had handed over to you. You had offered to switch kits like it’s usually done but the woman had insisted that you needed to keep your debut shirt from your first game for Barça and you were internally really glad she understood since you didn’t seriously want to give it up. She had still given you hers and you couldn’t even deny that the colours of the jersey were quite pretty as you put it into your bag.

You took your time, talking with others while you packed away your stuff slowly. Jona had asked to talk to you anyway and you decided to just leave your stuff in the changing room before you left to go to his office. Jona was kind, telling you that he was glad you had found the confidence to also score yourself and assuring you that you were doing great. He did tell you that the extra training you had put in would have to be compensated with longer recovery and more physio appointments, simply to prevent you from getting any issues particularly with your knees, something you didn’t really mind even though ice baths weren’t your favourite thing to do.

When you re entered the changing room after your little talk with him, it was empty bar Alexia and Paños, the latter who gave you a quick goodbye and left. You hurried to put your shoes on, definitely not wanting to be stuck with Alexia any longer than necessary. Thankfully your bag was already almost fully packed as you were quick to push the rest of your stuff inside. Your day had been going great so far and you certainly didn’t want the blonde woman who was calmly sitting on the bench tying her shoes, to ruin it. Just as you were zipping your gym bag up and contemplating if you should even say goodbye to her, Alexia started speaking.

“Are you happy you scored today?”

You frowned at her question, certain that she was trying to poke fun at you with it though you didn’t really know how. It’s not like you stumbled and tripped to make the ball fall into the net so why was she being weird once again? Maybe you should have just said yes and quickly left to avoid any drama. But the way she was mustering you as you turned towards her, her face once again looking like she wasn’t really impressed by anything about you as she mustered you.

“Yes, I am. I hope you are happy too with the goal you scored through my assist.”

You felt childish the minute you said it but this was the first time you made even any kind of attempt to talk back to your teams Captain and you were simply tired of constantly hearing her snide side comments. The way her eyebrows immediately shot up made you regret your words as she slowly got up and walked over to you. You tried not to feel intimidated but that was easier said than done as the Catalan towered quite a few inches above you, your insides turning as she looked down at you. You weren’t exactly scared, you hadn’t been outright disrespectful but you were definitely still nervous as her eyes met yours. To your surprise she seemed amused at your answer, a slight smirk on her face and a twinkle in her eyes.

“Mhm.”

You couldn’t really make much of her little hum, technically she hadn’t even really said anything. Deciding to just move past her and leave before it gets any more weird, you grab your bag and take exactly one step towards the door before you’re stopped by Alexia tugging you back by the strap of your gym bag.

“Not so fast, I wanted to talk with you for a moment.”

You’re unsure if you’ve paled significantly at her words but it most definitely feels like it, the blood rushing from your cheeks to your organs as you try to stay calm. It’s clear to you what she wants - take apart the way you’ve played today at the game and make you overthink once again if signing for Barça, where everyone is so incredibly talented and good, was really a smart idea. You don’t want this otherwise great day to be ruined, the euphoria from the win earlier already fading quickly as you only feel nervousness. Deciding not to make yourself deal with this right now, you tug the strap of the bag out of her hands and make a beeline for the door.

“Sorry, I’ve got a lot to do still-“

One of her hands on your stomach gently stops you from getting anywhere. It is so big that it easily covers most of your lower torso and you can feel the warmth of it through the thin material of your shirt.

“It wasn’t a request.”

Her tone indicates that she means business and you briefly wonder if it’s smarter to just shut up, let her criticise you and then just cry it out at home. Maybe it’s because you’ve had a long day, maybe it’s because she had the audacity to just grab you like that twice or maybe it’s all those weeks of her constant criticism at anything you do. Whatever it is, you’re not willing to comply right now.

“I think I can make my own decisions.” Your tone is harsh and normally you’d never dare to speak to the captain of your team that way - especially not someone who has been captain for so long and is highly respected - but you’re just so done with her and her constant annoyance at you. You can see one of her eyebrows rise in surprise at your words before her expression darkens, the sight making you swallow harshly as you briefly consider just making a run for it and hope she doesn’t strangle you.

“Sit down.” Her voice is commanding now and the way she looks down at you with a stern expression has your insides twisting kind of in excitement and kind of in nervousness. You’re definitely overstepping into bland disrespect now as you wipe her hand off of you and send her dirty look. It’s less because you’re truly scared and more because if she doesn’t show you any respect and consideration - why should you do the same for her?

“We’re not on the pitch, you can’t tell me what to do.”

The chuckle that comes from her only serves to make you even more angry, the Catalan clearly not at all impressed as she answers with a clear and calm voice.

“Mhm, last time I checked Captains orders go even if we’re not on the pitch.”

You don’t have a rebuttal for that one - she’s right. Captains orders usually do go especially if your captain just asked you to stay back for a talk. So, knowing she’s going to just make this even worse for you if you continue to act up, you throw your hands up in frustration before you moodily let yourself fall back onto the bench, crossing your arms while you talk.

“Fine, since you’re so ready to criticise everything about me that it can’t even wait until tomorrow, go ahead.”

Alexia seems stunned at your words, sitting down next to you on the bench with a concerned expression.

“Why do you think I would criticise you?”

“Maybe because that’s literally you’ve been doing for these past weeks? I can’t do anything right when it comes to you.” You stand up, unable to sit all calmly next to her while more words come rushing out of you.

“I know Barcelona has higher standards as most clubs, that’s why I transferred but god, if I had known that you’d literally hate me from the first day on I would have thought twice about coming here.”

You don’t see the frown on Alexia’s face at your words but you do feel her tugging you towards her with a firm hand around your wrist as she gets up.

“I don’t hate you.” She looks less calm now, clearly upset at your words. “I didn’t know that you felt like I’m constantly criticising you.”

You roll your eyes at her words and feel her hand tightening slightly around your arm at that. It pisses you off further that she gets to be so angry about every little disrespect you show her but god forbid she doesn’t show everyone just how much she hates you by stressing every single day what mistakes you’ve made.

“Oh please, you’ve been ignoring me ever since I stepped foot in Barcelona - apart from telling me that I didn’t score enough or that I need to shoot harder or that that goal was lucky or that I need to pass less and try to score more or that I need to work on my strength and my fitness and that my drills aren’t perfect and - god! You’re constantly on my ass trying to find something new you can chastise me for.” The words are practically flooding out of you, the weeks of nagging from Alexia having apparently stressed you out a lot more than you had thought as you feel yourself getting hot with anger.

“Do you really think I don’t notice how much you dislike me? I don’t know what I did to you but you don’t have to act all innocent, I don’t buy it.”

At your words her hand on your wrist loosens a bit and you quickly wind it out of her grip and step back with crossed arms, feeling vulnerable now that you’ve finally let out just how much it hurts you how she treats you.

“I do not dislike you.” You want to scoff at her words but she continues talking, her eyes wide and a genuine look of shame and surprise on her face.

“When you came to Barcelona I was really interested in getting to know you and when I saw you, I immediately thought that you’re really pretty.” Her words get faster now and the heavy Spanish accent is clearly noticeable as she continues: “You seemed so sweet as you talked with everyone else and you are insanely talented, I’ve had my eyes on you already before you transferred to Barça. I was just trying to give you a little bit of a push, criticism always helped me be better and work harder. I didn’t realise that you’d think I don’t like you because of it.” She seems embarrassed as she continues, a slight blush appearing on her cheeks.

“I’m admittedly not the best at flirting, I didn’t really know what else to talk with you about so I just settled for football tips. I didn’t mean any harm, promesa. You’re incredible at playing.”

Alexia gives you a moment to say something but you’re honestly too stunned, not having expected literally any of this to be the reason for her behaviour - certain that she just had a personal problem with you. At your lack of answer she takes a deep breath before more words spill out.

“I know I messed up here and I truly didn’t mean to hurt you, I didn’t realise how horrible I would seem to you. I’m sorry. I’m really sorry. But you’re definitely wrong, I very much do like you.”

Your thoughts are tumbling around in your head as you try to make sense of how you had completely misinterpreted Alexia’s - admittedly weird way - of flirting. You only realise how disapproving of Alexia’s confession your silence must seem when she looks to the ground and takes a step back.

“I’m sorry if I made things even more awkward now but I didn’t want you to think you did something wrong. I understand if you don’t want anything to do with me. But please don’t think you’re a bad player because of me.” She moves back towards the bench to grab her bag and you finally unfreeze, grabbing her hand as it’s the closest to you. It feels warm and a little bit rough from the countless hours she spent lifting weights in the gym, though the calloused skin does feel nice under your own, softer hands.

“Sorry, you just caught me off guard, I was so sure you really don’t like me at all. I’m glad you do.”

She looks up at you, a shy smile on your face and for the first time since you’ve met her, she smiles back at you. The way her eyes crinkle and her hand slowly moves to hold onto yours does something weird to your stomach as you try to stay focused on the subject instead of how incredibly pretty her eyes are when she’s not staring down at you with a blank expression.

Alexia takes a deep breath before speaking again.

“You know, we could spend some time together. I can show you the parts of Barcelona you haven’t seen yet.”

You feel yourself smiling automatically and know the answer before she even finishes talking.

“That would be great.” Though you can’t resist to tease her a little bit, still astonished at how absolutely abhorrent her flirting is.

“As long as you keep your flirting by criticising me to a minimum.” She laughs at your words and the sound is enough to make your heart flutter, eliciting a chuckle from you as well.

For a moment you just look at each other, both still smiling. Until her gaze falls onto the clock on the wall and she frowns.

“It’s getting late and we have training again tomorrow, time to go.”

You roll your eyes and unwind your hand from hers before moving towards the bench to grab your stuff with a disapproving “You still can’t tell me what to do.”

Alexia’s hand wrapping around you from behind stops you in your tracks.

“You’ll learn soon enough that I most definitely can.” Her low voice so close to you along with her body pressed close to yours has a different kind of hotness than earlier cursing through your body. She releases you, but not before giving you a gentle pinch to your arm.

“And stop rolling your eyes at me.”

With that, she grabs her bag from the bench and opens the door, waiting for you to walk through first as you two make your way towards the parking lot.

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writtenbymisunderstoodnerds · 1 month

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Loving this fic do you write for Alyssa Thompson

Thank you! I haven't written for her, but I'd be open to it

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writtenbymisunderstoodnerds · 1 month

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Are you sure they like each other? (Alyssa Naeher x Reader)

Barely edited and I don't know if I happy with this, but I wanted to put something out. I hope you enjoy :)

Summary: Alyssa and reader are together, but very stoic and not affectionate in public. Think the team know they're together, apparently not. Start to question if they even like each other. Alyssa and reader turn into soft, love sick people when alone.

Warnings: Tiny bit suggestive, some swearing

Words: 3.3K

Alyssa had slipped out, taking our bags up to the room while I was surrounded by some of the team. I had offered to help, but she had insisted I stay to catch up, leaving before I could protest. Neither of us would be considered extroverts, though I was the one who liked to talk a bit more. Kristie pulled me into a tight hug before a few of the girls following suit, "How was your break Y/n?"

"It was pretty good. Alyssa and I just took it easy. Spent some time fixing up some of the stuff around the house I haven't had the time to do. Visited family, that sort of thing."

Confusion covered their faces, Kelley being the first one to speak up, "Wait. You spent the break with Alyssa?"

Now it was my turn to be confused. Alyssa and I had been together for almost 5 years, living together for 3. It wasn't something that had been hidden. Our relationship wasn't public knowledge, but friends and family knew we were together, or so I thought anyway. We weren't an affectionate couple in public or even with our friends, barely ever touching past an occasional hand on the back, a short hug after a game or if we were going to be apart. Occasionally, we would hold hands at home with family or I would lay with my head in her lap during movie night. I loved Alyssa more than words would describe, there was no doubt in my mind she felt the same. Public affection just made us both very uncomfortable.

"Why wouldn't I? We live together."

"Wait what? You and Alyssa live together?"

"You didn't know? We weren't hiding it. You know we're together right?"

Kelley looked as if I had grown a second head, "You and Alyssa are dating? No we didn't know that! What the hell Y/n?"

Alyssa's hand touched my lower back, letting me know she was there before dropping back to her side. "What's happening here? Why is there yelling?"

"Apparently they're just finding out we live together and have been together for the last almost 5 years."

"5 years?!? And you didn't tell us?"

Even Alyssa looked confused at this point, "What do you mean didn't tell you? It was never hidden. We assumed you knew."

Accusatory glares were sent our way while Alyssa and I just stood there confused. This was not how I expected my morning to go. "You've never kissed, held hands, cuddled or done anything remotely couple like. How were we supposed to know?"

"We've held hands a few times and I sleep against her on the bus sometimes. I get her coffee and breakfast every morning, Alyssa gets me flowers every week even at camp. Pretty sure we've mentioned our anniversary before. We say 'I love you' to each other all the time. Did none of you find that weird?"

"You're always sitting next to each other on the bus so no and we just figured you were close friends or something. I think there's been one time that you've gotten flowers from her in front of us."

"I've seen that a few times actually, but its always when she seems to have a bad day," Tierna spoke up.

Alyssa shrugged, "Well yeah, I get them every week, but if she's having a bad day then I'll get them on that day to cheer her up. Look, we just don't like PDA, we weren't hiding anything from you. We really thought you knew about us. And before you even ask, no we're not going to prove it. Now we're going to our room."

As soon as we entered our room, I flopped down on the bed, scooting over slightly when Alyssa lay down next to me. I pushed myself into her arms, leaving kisses on her jaw, her hand slipping under my shirt to draw random patterns. "You unpacked my stuff."

Alyssa held me closer, kissing my forehead. People held the impression that Alyssa disliked physical touch, which she did with most people. In reality, Alyssa loved cuddling with me, she loved holding my hand and kissing me. Just touching in general actually. When we first started dating, it was a welcome surprise. I expected some affection, but not as much as I received. There was definitely no complaints from me, I loved cuddling with my partners. "I always do, don't I?"

"You do and I appreciate it, but you don-"

She cut me off with a quick peck before speaking up not giving me the chance, "My love, how many times have you said I don't have to, yet I do it anyway?"

"Pretty much every camp," I mumbled against her neck, knowing what her response was going to be. It was always the same.

"Exactly. I do it because I love you and I want to make your day a little bit easier so how about you just accept it and let me do it."

It wasn't that I didn't like it, in fact I loved that she did it. I just always felt slightly bad when people did things for me. "Fine. I still can't believe they didn't know about us. I really thought they did."

"So did I. Maybe they just don't listen to us at all. It was all kind of entertaining though."

"It was, I can't believe they were so clueless. I have a feeling Emily is going to be annoying though. She had her mischief face on."

Alyssa's hand traveled further up my side as she rolled on top of me, "Unfortunately, I think you're right, but right now there are other things I would rather do than talk about Emily."

---

Just as I sat down for breakfast, Emily and Kelley slid onto the chairs in front of me. They just stared at me until I snapped, asking what they wanted. This was not what I needed early in the morning especially when I had only been awake for like half an hour. Alyssa was always down for breakfast after me, preferring to take her time to get ready and do her puzzles, while I just wanted coffee.

"So you and Alyssa are together right?"

"Uh yeah, why?"

"Just checking. How long have you been together?"

"Almost 5 years."

"How did you meet?"

I looked at between Emily and Kelley, trying to figure out why I was being interrogated once again, about my relationship. At this point, I was pretty sure the team believed we were lying or something. "You know this already."

"We forgot."

Alyssa approached, giving me a quick smile which I returned, "Perfect timing. I'm being interrogated about our relationship again."

"Why?"

I shrugged, pushing Alyssa's breakfast in front of her receiving a quite thank you. I didn't answer Kelley's question, instead deciding to eat breakfast before it got cold. "Are you two being forced to be together?"

Both of our heads shot up at that. It was such a ridiculous question. There would be no logical reason for us to be pretending to be together especially considering we weren't public knowledge. I bit back my laugh before answering, "What? What makes you think that? Why would that be a thing?"

Emily shrugged, "You just don't seem to like each other like that."

"Go away Kelley," Alyssa mumbled before going back to her breakfast. I ignored her again, getting up for Alyssa's coffee instead. When I returned, Kelley and Emily were still there, giving Alyssa a suspicious look. I handed Alyssa the cup before sitting down again.

"Thank you love."

Emily narrowed her eyes at us, "Suspicious."

Alyssa rolled her eyes while I flipped Emily off. This whole thing was starting to get old. "Go eat your breakfast."

Later that day, we were back in our room, enjoying the time we had before practice. Alyssa was reading, while I lay in the sun on the balcony. I started to want cuddles. I wouldn't say I was clingy because it was true. We could spend hours doing completely different things. Sometimes though, I just craved touching or being held by her. I gave her a few minutes before calling out to her, knowing she would come to me without hesitation.

Alyssa groaned, but got up, slipped off her shirt and sat down behind me with my head in her lap. We met in the middle, lips connecting briefly before I wiggled around to get into a better position. Alyssa eyebrows raised, amusement shining in her eyes, "Comfortable?"

I smirked, lacing my fingers with hers that rest on my stomach, "Very. Do you like me Lyssa? Is someone forcing you to date me?"

"Not even a little bit. Don't you know I'm only with you for your body?"

"That's what I thought. Maybe I should confess that I'm only with you for your abs."

She smirked at my response, "I had my suspicions. You're obsessed."

"Not my fault they're great abs."

Fingers ran through my hair as Alyssa leant down to kiss my forehead, "You know I love you right Y/n/n? I don't want you to ever doubt that because I don't show you affection in public."

"You know how I feel about PDA, I don't like it, I never have. I have never once doubted your love for me Alyssa and I hope you haven't doubted mine. I love you."

"Good. I have never doubted your love either."

---

Anger and worry coursed through me when I saw Alyssa go down. It was always my worst fear during games, but it didn't really happen during practice. I know we got competitive, there was no reason for it to happen during practice though. I ran up, kneeling beside her, hand grabbing hers, "Are you okay Lys?"

"This ones going to hurt," Alyssa winced, but quickly grabbed my arm when I turned to Rose who had taken her out. "Hey, it's not her fault, it was an accident. Go see if she's okay and be nice."

I took a breath to calm myself down before walking up to Rose. Rose started fidgeting nervously as I walked up to her, "Hey, are you okay Rose?"

"Y-yeah. S-sorry"

I hugged her, feeling her relax against me. Hugs weren't necessarily my favourite thing except when it was with Alyssa, but I knew Rose liked them and I didn't want her to feel bad. It wasn't actually her fault. "Rosie, it was an accident. Don't beat yourself up because of it, but maybe don't make a habit of taking out out keeper during practice, we kinda need her."

---

"You guys coming to dinner?"

"Uh yeah, just going to drop our stuff off."

Once we were in our room, Alyssa sat on the edge of the bed as I knelt behind her, arms wrapping around her shoulders loosely. She lent back against me with a sigh, kissing my hand. "Are you sure you're okay?"

"Think my shoulder might bruise, but I'm okay hun. Don't worry so much."

I lift her shirt over her head, lips meeting the spot that was already starting to bruise then moving around to her neck, cheek and lips, "You know I can't help worrying about you, even if it's a bit ridiculous."

Alyssa turned around, pushing me back and hovering over me, "Well, I'm the same so I can't really say anything. I love you Y/n/n."

I looped my arm around the back of her neck, pulling her down so I could peck her lips, "I love you Lys, but you need to get off cause we need to go down for dinner."

She rolled off me with one final kiss before standing up, "Fine."

"Shirt."

---

My eyes fluttered open to the feeling of lips being pressed to every part of my face and neck. I giggled, arms wrapping around her neck to bring her lips to mine. You wouldn't guess it, but Alyssa always kissed me softly, as if I was something precious. It honestly drove me crazy.

Alyssa pulled away slowly, grin plastered across her face, "Happy anniversary love."

My grin matched her, as I pecked her lips, "Happy anniversary Lys. I love you."

We spent a little longer in bed than usual, lazy kisses and cuddles shared before reluctantly dragging our selves out of bed and into the shower. Unfortunately, we had training today so we couldn't give in to the clear desires we both had, instead rushing through the shower and downstairs before there was anymore temptation and we ended up late.

Alyssa and I were discussing dinner plans when we walked into the meal room. We never went out on our anniversary, always staying in and just being with each other in the comfort of our own home. This year was different because we were in a hotel, but we would make do. Just as we sat down, Kelley sat across from us, our conversation ending as we waited for her to say something. "Do you guys even like each other? I mean you guys just seem so indifferent around each other, sure you talk and even joke around sometimes, but it's no different then if you were talking to team mates, we've never heard you talk about anything remotely relationship like."

My arm rest on the back of Alyssa's chair, playing with the baby hairs at the base of her neck. That wasn't a usual occurrence, but it was our anniversary. I was feeling a mix of different, slightly overwhelming emotions from love to happiness, and nerves from the fact I was proposing tonight. I just wanted to be close to her right now and the usual leg against mine wasn't enough. Alyssa must have sensed it because her hand rest on my thigh under the table, squeezing gently as I spoke, "Of course we do. We were literally just talking about our plans tonight for our anniversary."

"That was talk about your anniversary? It sounded like you were talking about grocery shopping."

"We were, but in relation to our anniversary."

"So what are you going to do for your anniversary?"

"Chill out in our hotel room. We never do anything big."

"Yeah okay. That tracks with the appearance of your relationship."

Alyssa had gone back to our room after training while I had gone to the store to pick up a few snacks to sneak in and some flowers for her. She always got me flowers so I wanted to return the favour for once. We were planning on ordering in and watching movies before likely ending the night doing inappropriate cuddling. It was our favourite way to spend our anniversaries. Thankfully, we had an off day tomorrow so we could get away with it.

After placing the bag down on the table, I called out for Alyssa, getting a response from the bathroom almost instantly. My arms wrapped around Alyssa when she emerged from the bathroom, leaving a lingering kiss against her lips. Her eyes dropped down to the bouquet in my hand, a small smile appearing. "This isn't your actual gift, but you always get me flowers so I thought it was my turn. Your gift is running late."

"They're beautiful, thank you Y/n/n. You know you didn't have to get me anything."

"I know, but you also always get me something despite me saying the same thing, therefore shut up."

Alyssa laughed, pushing me away gently and taking the flowers, "You speak to me so romantically my love."

I pulled her back into me, peppering her face with kisses, "I love you."

"I love you. I ordered dinner already, it should be here soon. Also here," Alyssa handed out a small wrapped box. Inside was a gold chain with a small keepers glove attached. It was something I had mentioned wanting, a way to have her close when she wasn't there physically.

"You remembered. I love it Lys."

"Of course I did."

After a short make out session and dinner, we cuddled up in bed to watch a movie. Maybe 15 minutes had passed before I started getting restless. My focus dropped from the movie, instead playing with Alyssa's fingers. I never was the best at staying still. My mind soon drifted to the pool downstairs, it had been a while since I got to go and the urge was suddenly there.

When I shifted position once again, Alyssa chuckled and paused the movie, "I've lost you haven't I?"

I grinned up at her, kissing her softly. Alyssa always knew me so well. "Do you want to go swimming? It's late so no one will be around."

Alyssa knew I loved swimming so she agreed pretty easily, after some teasing of course. We made our way down to the pool, both wearing tank tops and shorts. No one was around so it didn't matter what we wore. I jumped straight in, swimming around a bit while Alyssa sat on the edge of the pool. After a few minutes, I swam up between Alyssa's legs resting my arms on them as I lent up connecting our lips in a lingering kiss.

"Come in."

"It's cold."

"Love, it's a heated pool."

"Okay fine, I just enjoy watching you swim around."

"But, if you come in then we can cuddle, kiss," My hand ran up the inside of her thigh, "Touch."

Alyssa instantly slid into the pool, arm wrapping around me and pulling me against her. "You're a tease."

My hands slipped under her tank top, nails scratching down her back and over her stomach, "It's only teasing if I leave it at that. Just wait until we get ba-"

A loud voice interrupted the moment, annoyance crossing Alyssa's face as she stepped back slightly, but didn't let me go. "Oh my god! They really are together."

I groaned, turning to glare at Emily and Kelley, "Fuck off and stop ruining our anniversary."

Once they were out of sight again, I pulled myself out of the pool, Alyssa rest on my legs as I had done earlier. "What are you doing?"

I pulled the towel that I had hidden the little black box in closer. Inside was a a plain gold band with a round cut diamond. Alyssa didn't often wear jewelry and she liked simple things so I knew she would love it. "I have something for you."

"You waited until we were at the pool to give it to me?"

"Well it wasn't the original plan, but I got nervous." My fingers laced with hers, Alyssa looking up at me curiously. "Never in my life did I think I would fall for someone as hard or fast as I did with you. From the boring, quiet days at home spent doing housework or errands to the movie nights and dinner dates, I love living life with you. I love the adventures we've had, I love working with you, fuck, I just love being with you Alyssa. I look forward to every new day because I get to do it with you. With you by my side, anything is possible. This is a shit speech, but I'm nervous and you love me anyway."

Alyssa chuckled, tears already forming in her eyes before I revealed the little box. "I love you Alyssa, I love you so much more than I thought possible. I want to live life with you forever. With that being said, Alyssa Naeher will you marry me?"

Arms wrapped around my waist tightly, lips connecting with mine, in a soft, emotional kiss, "Yes, yes I will marry you Y/n."

I slipped the ring on her finger, connecting our lips again. Alyssa pulled away too soon for my liking, reaching for her own towel, pulling out a black box similar to the one I had moments before. Alyssa opened it, revealing a plain rose gold band with three small gems set into it. I soon realised it was both our birth stones and one I wasn't quite sure of. "You beat me to it, but will you marry me Y/n?"

"I suppose I can't say no seeing as I just gave you a ring."

Alyssa laughed, sliding the ring onto my finger before kissing me again. "These are our birthstones, what's this one?"

"When we first started dating."

"I love it, I love you."

A crash from behind us instantly caught our attention. About half the team stood there, sheepish smiles in place and a phone pointed in our direction. Seeing as they were caught, everyone started talking over each other, congratulations being thrown our way. I rolled my eyes, turning back to Alyssa. "Let's get out of here before they surround us. We have celebrating to do."

#uswnt x reader #uswnt imagine #woso x reader #woso imagines #alyssa naeher x reader #alyssa naeher imagine

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writtenbymisunderstoodnerds · 2 months

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I'm so excited for basically all of them!! I love so much the adhd!reader and I miss them so much:(

the Christen one I'll be so good! is hard to heal and move on when a relationship ends because death especially when you were married.

but the Alyssa's fics will give all the comfort we need ❤️‍🩹

Thank you! I don't know which one yet, but am hoping to post something in the next couple of days. Likely the Christen one or Alyssa cause they're closest to being finished.

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writtenbymisunderstoodnerds · 2 months

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So excited for the Alyssa Naeher ones!!!!

Sameee! I love writing Alyssa :) I'm hoping to have something out in the next couple of days!

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writtenbymisunderstoodnerds · 2 months

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if you don't mind, can you show us your WIPs? 🫶🏼

Honestly, there's too many to count. I'm the master of starting then never finishing them!

Here's a glimpse at a few of my more recent WIPs

USWNT x adhd!reader part 6: The honeymoon and life after marriage

New love (CP x reader): Reader dating again after the loss of her wife

USWNT x Reader: Reader gets insecure when a new player joins the team, feeling like she's being replaced. The team reassure her.

Sick day secret: Reader is Ali's sister. She's sick, Emily/Tierna (Undecided) looks after her. Get's caught by Ali.

Are you sure they like each other? (Alyssa Naeher): Alyssa and reader are together, but very stoic and not affectionate in public. Think the team know they're together, apparently not. Start to question if they even like each other. Alyssa and reader turn into soft, love sick people when alone.

Alyssa x Reader: Alyssa and R already have a child and they are adopting another one. just a cute family baby proofing the house and preparing the baby's new room and including the older one (that's still little) in everything because the mommas don't want they feel left out.

And something completely new that I thought I would give a try after recently becoming obsessed,

Ona Battle x Reader: Ona and reader fall in love. Friends to lovers?

These are my main WIPs at the moment. Let me know what one you might want to see first!

#uswnt x reader #woso x reader #woso imagines #uswnt imagine

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writtenbymisunderstoodnerds · 2 months

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I'm the same person that requested the Alyssa one and I have a prompt now (kind of). Alyssa and R already have a child and they are adopting another one. just a cute family baby proofing the house and preparing the baby's new room and including the older one (that's still little) in everything because the mommas don't want they feel left out :((

It's on the list!

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writtenbymisunderstoodnerds · 2 months

Text

The date (Sofia Huerta x Reader)

As requested this is part two of Not my best idea

I'm hoping to start working through some of my requests, but don't hold me to that, life is a bit busy at the moment.

I'm sick so this is not really edited. Hope you enjoy :)

Warnings: None

Words: 2.2K

There was a knock on my door at exactly 6pm. Sofia was waiting on the other side with a single red rose. I smiled as she handed me the rose, feeling butterflies erupt. Normally, I was the one giving flowers or organising dates. It was a nice change, but not something I wanted regularly. I loved organising dates and spoiling the women I was taking out. It was my love language.

"How long were you waiting outside to get here right on time?" I teased as Sofia blushed.

"Maybe a few minutes. I'm sorry I didn't get you more than one rose. You deserve the best, but the shop I went to only had ones that didn't look great."

"Don't be, I kinda dig the one rose. Let me get my jacket and we're good to go."

"You uh look good by the way."

I took a second to look Sofia up and down, taking her in. She had on black jeans, a plain white t-shirt, and a black leather jacket draped across her arm. Sofia looked beautiful, even though it wasn't anything extravagant. I didn't really like fancy first dates or fancy dates in general so Sofia had reluctantly agreed to a more casual date even though according to Sofia, I deserved to be spoilt. It was a warm night so I followed Sofia's lead, draping my jacket over my arm before taking hers as well.

Sofia protested, telling me she could carry her own jacket, but I shrugged, cutting her off, "You look good too Sof, like really good."

She blushed, clearing her throat, "Thank you. Shall we?"

I laughed, arm wrapping around her shoulder, "You're cute when you're nervous. Let's go."

We walked down the street hand in hand. Sofia was trying her best to hide the nerves, but her twitching fingers, the way she kept wiping her spare hand on her pants, and the way she wasn't speaking, gave away her nerves. "You know I don't bite. Well, unless you're into that."

Sofia turned red, looking away briefly, "Sorry, you just make me really nervous."

"You already embarrassed yourself and I kissed you regardless, so there's no reason to be nervous."

She groaned, covering her face with her free hand, "You don't need to remind me. I just want to impress you."

"Oh no, that'll be my go-to story. I'm just a regular person, you don't need to impress me. If I wasn't already impressed with you, I wouldn't have agreed to go out with you so please just take a breath and try to relax. Think you can do that for me?"

"I can try."

We stopped at a Mexican food truck, each ordering our food. Sofia paid before I had the chance to protest. I hated people buying me things even if it was just food. I pushed that discomfort aside as best as possible to enjoy the date. It was something I could bring up later if needed.

When we sat down to eat, I asked Sofia a few questions about being a professional athlete and her love for soccer. Knowing she was nervous, I decided to ask easier questions for now until she relaxed a bit. The more in-depth or family questions could wait. Sofia rambled on about her job with me listening intently. I was genuinely interested in what she had to say. The slight rasp in her voice already sucking me in. I knew I could listen to her talk for hours and not get bored.

Sofia's cheeks flushed light pink when she realised my attention was completely on her, "Sorry. Enough about me, what about you? Why did you become a lifeguard?"

"Don't apologise, I like hearing you talk about it. I can see how much you love what you do. Um, I never actually planned on being a lifeguard, it's only been a few months, but I enjoy it more than I thought."

Talking about myself felt awkward, something I was never very good at. I knew I should say more, I just kinda clammed up due to the awkwardness and not knowing what to say. It was definitely easier when more specific questions were asked.

Sofia giggled in response before asking, "What did you do before being a lifeguard? I assume you were doing something being 2- actually, I don't know how old you are. Sorry that was kinda rude wasn't it?"

I laughed at her getting flustered again. Some people probably would have found it rude how she asked. I was just entertained.

"You're okay. I'm 27 by the way. I was a wedding/family photographer before, well I still am and I'll go back to it. I just needed a bit of a break. Being a photographer is great, I do genuinely love it, but I was fully booked most of the time, traveling to many different states constantly. It got a bit overwhelming, I was burnt out and exhausted. Obviously, you need money to live so I couldn't just quit. My aunt owns this hotel and when I confided in her how I was feeling, she offered me the lifeguard job for as long as I wanted it. So yeah, I'll go back soon, maybe experiment with a different kind of photography while I have this job as a backup."

Sofia winked, squeezing my hand, "You make a very attractive lifeguard. Bet you're just as attractive with a camera. Maybe you should try sports photography. In all seriousness, I'm glad you got the break you needed, I understand how exhausting traveling can be. I would love to see some of your work sometime if that's okay?"

"You flatter me Sof. I have actually thought about sports photography, maybe you can be my practice. Also, I have a whole Instagram of my work you can look at."

"I would love to be your practice."

We spent another ten or so minutes at the food truck, Sofia scrolling through my Instagram while I sat there awkwardly due to the compliments. After a while, Sofia took my hand, dragging me away from the food truck. I managed to tone down my excitement when we stopped outside the arcade. "How did you know I liked arcades?"

"Um, I may have stalked your Instagram."

"Stalker."

---

For being a professional athlete, Sofia was surprisingly bad at throwing a basketball. I stood behind her, hands covering her hands, guiding her to throw the ball into the net. Sofia jumped excitedly, picking up the next ball.

"You're not pretending this time are you?"

"Unfortunately not."

My hands trailed down to her hips, settling maybe a little lower than they should. Sofia didn't stop me, instead leaning back into me. "Try yourself now."

Sofia missed again, leaning back into me with a groan, "How are you so good at this?"

I shrugged, guiding her to throw the ball again, "I dabble."

"In basketball?"

"Also volleyball and boxing currently. Soccer when I was a teenager."

"Wow. Where do you play?"

"It's just fun, mostly with my friends, sometimes like a fun community thing. I used to play more seriously in high school."

We spent a few hours at the arcade, playing all the games and getting to know each other. Touches became more frequent and confident on both sides as time went on. There weren't any proper kisses yet, only a few cheek or hand kisses. Don't get me wrong, I really wanted to kiss her and her lingering looks on my lips gave me the idea she wanted to as well. We were in public though so I decided to wait. PDA wasn't really my thing. Sofia was also a public figure which meant we had to be a little more careful.

It was about 10:30pm when we decided to head back. Sofia had the day off tomorrow, but I still had to work from mid-morning so I didn't want to be out too late. Sofia leaned against the wall of the hotel, playing with my fingers. "I had a really good time tonight. Do you want to come back to my room?"

I stepped closer, practically trapping her against the wall. "Me too," I whispered, leaning in capturing her lips with mine. My hand rested low on her hip, hers cupping the back of my neck as I deepened the kiss. Sofia's tongue ran along my lip, trying to coax them apart, but I pulled away before she could. "You are making me blur every boundary I created for pre and post-first dates."

"Sorry."

"No, you're not."

Sofia smirked, leaving a lingering kiss against my lips, "Not really. You're fun to be around and an incredible kisser Y/n, but I also don't want you to do anything you don't want to do or aren't ready to do."

"I never would, you'll soon learn I'm very stubborn. I'll come to your room, but things stay PG 13."

"Deal."

---

"Can I see you again?" Sofia asked, playing with my hair as I lay next to her, head resting on my hand so I could down at her.

"You're fun to be around, I really enjoy spending time with you-"

Sofia frowned before smiling sadly, "There's a but coming isn't there? It's okay if you're not interested in anything more than tonight, I had a great time regardless."

"No, it's not that, I would love to see you again. This isn't necessarily a deal breaker and I probably should have thought about this sooner. I know you're staying in the hotel for camp or whatever, but where do you actually live? Like uh, how far away are you from me?"

She giggled, pecking my lips quickly, "I thought I was the nervous one. To answer your question, about 25 minutes with no traffic."

"Wait really? Why are you staying at a hotel then?"

"Camp rules, better for team morale and bonding."

This time I leaned down, initiating a mini make-out session. It had been a week or so of knowing Sofia and I already knew I was screwed. I was drawn to her, she made me giddy and touchy. She was also a really good kisser, I already didn't want to leave. "In that case, I would love to see you again on one condition."

"What's that?"

"You let me plan the next date."

Sofia kissed me softly, "Anything as long as I get to do that some more."

---

Sofia and I had talked for a while last night before falling asleep cuddled up. Unfortunately, I didn't get to see her this morning because I had to get ready for work. As much as I wanted to wish her a good morning, I had managed to slip out without waking her, sending a text to assure her I had just bailed on her.

About midday, the group of women I was used to seeing entered the pool area, each claiming their lounger. My eyes met Sofia's sending her a soft smile as I approached the group.

"Good morning ladies, how are we today? Can I get you anything?"

"Morning Y/n, all is good. Are the umbrellas out today?"

"That was next on the list, I'll grab them for ya now."

Emily smirked, nudging Sofia's shoulder, "Sof will help."

I guess they didn't know about our date. It wasn't a big deal, I figured Sofia would tell them when she was ready. I chuckled turning to Sofia, "You don't have to, I got it."

Sofia looked at me for a second. A small, slightly shy smile was present before she spoke softly, "I don't mind."

Once we were away from the group, I discreetly squeezed her hand, "How did you sleep beautiful?"

Sofia smiled, squeezing my hand again, "Amazingly. You should know, you were there."

"Sorry, I had to slip out early. I didn't want to wake you up on your day off."

Sofia's hand rest on my arm, seemingly not caring if anyone saw, "It's okay. Was a bit disappointed not to get a kiss when I woke up. Maybe you could make that up to me now?"

"What about them? I assume they don't know about our date."

"They don't, but that was so they didn't annoy me about it while I was so nervous. Please don't tell them about how it happened yet. I can't face that yet."

I laughed, already imagining how much fun it would be to expose that down the line. However, right now Sofia was looking up at me expectantly. I cupped her cheek, lips connecting in a lingering kiss. I heard yelling from behind us as I pulled away, pecking her lips one more time. "That's all you get because you're technically a customer right now and I will get in trouble if I get caught."

Sofia pouted, but I refused to give in, shaking my head in response. Just because my boss was my aunt, doesn't mean I wouldn't actually get in trouble. "Fine. Do you want to come over again tonight?"

"I would love to."

We made our way back with the umbrellas, instantly being interrogated by Emily. "What the fuck did we miss? How did you go from a stuttering, red mess to kissing her overnight?"

Sofia shrugged, "We just talked after you guys left yesterday then ended up on a date last night."

Unfortunately, more people started showing up so I had to go back to my spot. I would have loved staying there with her and her team, but getting to watch her relaxing in a bikini, knowing I got to be with her after work, made it more tolerable.

#uswnt x reader #uswnt imagine #woso imagines #sofia huerta x reader #uswnt imagines #woso x reader

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writtenbymisunderstoodnerds · 3 months

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Valentines day (Emily Sonnett x Reader)

I don't really know what this is. The idea randomly came to me so I hope you like it :)

Summary: Emily loves valentines day so despite them being in a fight, Y/n still does something for her.

Warnings- Tiny bit suggestive at the end

Words: 1.8k

---

Emily and I had gotten into a pretty big fight a few days ago. We had barely talked or even see each other since with her staying in the spare room. I was meant to move to be with her, but there was a big project at work that I had to finish before I could. Well, I could have not done the project. It just meant likely missing out on a big promotion with my transfer. Understandably, Emily wasn't very happy about that because it meant a month or two before I could make the move.

It was valentines day, we still weren't talking, but I wasn't going to not do anything because of that. With how pissed she was at me, she likely hadn't done anything for me, but I didn't care. I didn't care much about the day anyway. Emily loved valentines day though, I wouldn't take that away from her, no matter how annoyed I was.

Although I had to work today, I still wanted to make it as special as possible. Months ago I had made reservations at the fancy restaurant Emily had wanted to try. I didn't know if Emily would come to dinner with me, but I was going to be there to pick her up regardless. Before work, I made Emily her favourite breakfast. She was likely awake so I quietly peeked in the room to find her sitting up, scrolling on her phone. Emily didn't acknowledge me, only looking up when I placed the tray on her lap. I walked back to the door, stopping briefly before leaving.

"Happy valentines day. I love you."

Just before the door closed I heard a quiet 'I love you'. It was something at least. I hadn't heard that in person since our fight. I would never go that long without telling her I loved her, so I had messaged her at least once a day. Emily always replied, sometimes even messaging me first.

Before leaving, I left flowers in a vase on the counter, making sure to put a fake flower in with it. Every time I got Emily flowers, I would add a fake one in. It had become sort of a tradition after we were messing around in shops one day and I jokingly held up a fake flower, telling her I would love her until it died. I also added a massage/spa voucher, a nail voucher and a letter. It was written before our fight. Everything in it was still true though so I wanted her to read it.

Hi my love,

Happy valentines day. I want you to know how much you mean to me, not just on Valentine's Day, but every single day. You are my rock, my partner-in-crime, and my favourite person to spend time with. I love you more than words will ever be able to express.

You bring light into my life in ways I never imagined possible. Your laughter and smile is infectious, it fills me with so much happiness, love, and warmth. Everyday with you is an adventure, filled with love, laughter, goofiness and so much more. Being with you is the happiest I've ever been. I can't wait for the adventures, the boring, the fun and everything else that awaits.

Unfortunately, I have work to do today, but you deserve to be pampered like the royalty you are. Go enjoy your day getting pampered, then put on something semi fancy and a little sexy ;) I'll pick you up at 6:30.

I love you more than words can describe <3

P.S I'm going to love you until the last flower dies.

-Y/n

---

Today had probably been one of my least productive days at work. I had spent the entire day thinking about if Emily would actually come to dinner with me. I would convince myself she would, then the doubt would creep in and I would convince myself she would stand me up.

At 6:30, I was waiting in the living room for Emily. To be honest, I was still half expecting her to not come out. Thankfully, a few minutes later she appeared, wearing a knee length, halter neck red dress with black heels. My eyes roamed over her body, taking in every inch of her. Fuck, she looked incredible. I stood in front of her, not touching her because I wasn't sure where we actually stood. "You look incredible Em."

"Thank you, you look amazing Y/n/n."

I offered my arm, internally smiling when hers looped with mine, "You ready to go?"

"Yeah. Where are we going?"

"You'll see."

Emily was super excited when she saw where we were. Throughout dinner, things were slightly awkward, but we had both seemed to put our fight to the side for now at least. We talked about our days and any light hearted topics we could think of. Even though things were still a bit awkward, I was incredibly happy to be talking again. I did miss touching her though. We were a very touchy couple, especially in private. Normally, there would be arm or leg touches, random kiss or cuddles. Tonight there was only a few minutes of hand holding and a cheek kiss.

"Thank you for today by the way. I haven't been pampered like that in a long time. You didn't have to make me cry with that letter though."

"You deserve to be pampered Em. You also know I'm better with written words then spoken."

"It was beautiful. I didn't forget or just not do anything by the way. Your gift is just running late, it should be here tomorrow."

"You know I wouldn't care if you didn't get me anything."

"I know, but you deserve to get spoilt as well."

After dinner, we found ourselves walking along the waterfront. We weren't talking or touching, but it was nice regardless. I didn't want to go home still on bad terms with Emily. The fighting was exhausting, I missed my girlfriend and just wanted to finish the night cuddled up with her. So when we came across a bench, I sat down, patting the spot next to me.

A few minutes of silence passed before I decided to speak up, "I wasn't sure if you would come tonight. Honestly, I was expecting to be stood up."

"We may be fighting, but I wouldn't miss this for the world Y/n/n. I know you. Which means I know you thought about this and booked this months in advance. I know you put a lot of thought into valentines day because you know I like it. You put so much effort into this for me, I love you too much to just disregard that."

My fingers laced with hers, kissing the back of her hand, "I don't want to be fighting anymore. I miss you."

"Me neither. I guess I was just hurt that you didn't want to come with me."

I turned so I was facing her, hands holding both of hers. I wanted her to see how serious I was, to remove any doubt about me wanting to be with her. After closing the distance, I couldn't imagine ever going back to that long term. I needed her to understand that.

"Emily, I'm still coming with you. Not coming with you has never been a thought let alone an option. I just need a month or two to finish this project. It's not ideal, I know that, but this project will get me to the point in my career that I've been working toward for years. It'll mean less hours, more autonomy over what I do."

"Maybe didn't want to come was the wrong way to say that. I was worried that you would change your mind and decide you didn't want to move. Or what if the project runs longer or something happens."

"Hey, listen to me. You are my future Em, there is nothing that would make me not want to move with you. If I stay, even if the project runs longer, I will be coming to you in 2 months at the absolute most."

"If that happens you won't get your promotion."

"I'll figure it out if that happens. There will be other options if it comes to it. Look, if you really don't want me to stay, say the word and I'll move when you do. Our relationship is more important than a job."

Emily squeezed my hands, shaking her head quickly, "No, this is a huge opportunity for you. I'm not going to take that away from you because I got scared. Besides, you're moving because of me, it wouldn't be fair. Get that promotion then come home to me. I know it was a bit of an overreaction, we've done long distance before, it's just been a while and that fear creeped in. I love you Y/n/n."

"I love you. I will always come home to you, you are my home Em. Now that we've sorted that, kiss me because I miss that."

Emily cupped the back of my neck, lips connecting with mine in a rough, passionate kiss. Things got heated quickly so I pulled away as we were still in public. "I missed you."

"I missed you too. I'm sorry for being so stubborn."

"It's okay, let's not make a habit of it though. Since it's valentines day, can you tell me what my gift is?"

Emily chuckled, pecking my lips quickly, "Nope. You can be patient one more day."

"Fine. Can we get ice cream then go home and cuddle now?"

Emily winked, "Just cuddles?"

My fingers ran along her thigh, slipping under her dress, "Maybe spicy cuddles."

---

The next day, Emily and I had spent most of the day in bed sleeping after a long night and cuddling. I had surprised her with breakfast before confusing her by getting back into bed. Normally, I would have to work, but after the last few days, I had decided to take the day off to just spend time with her. About mid afternoon, Emily dragged us out of bed to shower and finally get dressed. I didn't understand her rush to get ready until there was a knock on the door.

"Are we expecting someone?"

Emily smiled excitedly, "That's probably your gift. Go open it."

I slowly opened the door to find a large teddy bear on the other side. I figured it was a delivery person holding it so I awkwardly said hello, waiting for them to move or something. The teddy bear was handed to me, though when I looked up, it ended up on the floor. Standing in front of me, was my bestfriend that I hadn't seen in person for over a year. He had moved out of the country and things were busy so visits were few and far between. I jumped into his arms, holding him tight for who knows how long. We had been friends since birth pretty much, this was the longest we had gone without seeing each other.

I pulled away, letting him inside before hugging Emily, "You did this?"

Emily smiled, wiping away my tears, "I know you how much you were missing him."

"Thank you Em. I love you so much."

#uswnt x reader #uswnt imagine #woso imagines #woso x reader #emily sonnett x reader #uswnt imagines

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writtenbymisunderstoodnerds · 3 months

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the Ashley one was so cute, thank you so much!!

Thank you 😊 I'm really glad you liked it

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writtenbymisunderstoodnerds · 3 months

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Secret softy (Ashley Sanchez x Reader)

Based on this request

Sorry this took a while to finish, writers block is a pain. Hopefully this is okay and is kinda what you wanted. Thanks for reading and hope you enjoy :)

Warnings: None I think

Words: 2.4k

Three months had passed since I last saw Ashley. We had been together officially for almost four years, but we had been mostly long-distance since the start. With us both being professional athletes, her soccer and me hockey, it didn't leave as much time for visits during on season. We would spend off-season with the other when possible, Ashley had been pretty busy lately, unfortunately. It didn't matter now though, my season was officially over which meant more time with her.

I was trying to enjoy time with Ashley, but I was kind of freaking out. I was going to be going to more of Ashley's camps so we could spend more time together. The only problem was her team didn't seem to like me very much. I knew I could be a bit standoffish when I met new people, but I had tried to be more friendly when I met them. I wasn't actually sure if that's why they didn't like me, it was more an assumption based on past experiences. They were her team, some of her closest friends, honestly, I wanted them to like me. Three years had passed since our first meeting and I didn't know how to change it.

Ashley wrapped her arms around my shoulders, snapping me out of my thoughts, "You okay Y/n/n?"

"I'm fine."

"No, we don't do that. You can be stoic, grumpy, tough, or whatever around everyone else, but not me. If you don't want to talk to me about it, tell me, I won't push. Just don't pretend you're fine when I know you're not."

"I'm sorry. Cuddles?"

Ashley lay down on the couch, letting me lie on top of her, head resting against her neck. It was a lot easier to deal with feelings when wrapped up in the comfort she provided. After a few minutes, all my thoughts just tumble out.

Fingers ran through my hair, making me groan. Ashley always knew what I needed, when I needed it. It's one of the reasons I loved her so much. "My love, it's not that they don't like you. I know what you're going to say, but it's true. They just find you a little bit intimidating, they don't know how to act around you, they don't know how to read you."

"You couldn't have mentioned this like 3 years ago?"

"Don't take that tone with me Y/n. I didn't know how they felt until recently when I told them you'd be around more this season. All you have to do is try to be a bit more open, talk to them, interact with them. A smile every now and then wouldn't hurt either. I know it's not easy for you, but even trying will make a difference."

I sighed, nuzzling my face further into her, "I'm sorry Ash. Okay, I can do that. At least I think. I'm sorry for being grumpy with you. Let me cuddle for a minute then I'll make dinner and we can finish packing, maybe a bath?"

She kissed my forehead, fingers running through my hair, "You weren't grumpy at me, you just let the nerves get the better of you. Don't make a habit of it though. A bath sounds fantastic. I love you grumpy."

I peppered her face with kisses before dragging myself up, "I love you."

---

A smile instantly appeared as arms wrapped around my waist, accompanied by the familiar voice of my girlfriend. "Hi baby."

I turned around, wrapping my arms around her and lifting her up, her legs wrapping around me. My head rest against her chest, enjoying the feeling of her again. Honestly, it hadn't even been that long apart, I had to spend a few weeks at home before joining her. Ashley was my place, my home, my comfort. Anytime we were apart, even for a few days, felt like forever. "I missed you."

Some of Ashley's team were in the lobby hanging back waiting for her. I sent them a quick smile and wave before turning my attention back to Ashley. She pecked my lips, arm wrapping around my shoulder, letting me cuddle against her. Despite what most would think, 90% of the time I was the little spoon and I loved it. "I missed you too. Dinner tonight? We have training this afternoon so maybe 7?"

"Wouldn't miss it for the world, I'll find somewhere and sort it."

"Thank you. Also, team bonding tomorrow night if you're up for it. No pressure."

"I'll be there."

All I really wanted to do was spend alone time with Ashley. I decided on a picnic on the beach instead of a restaurant. So while Ashley was at training, I went to the store to pick up some of her favourite snacks, drinks, desserts, and of course flowers. At about 6:30, I ordered Ashley's favourite pizza then headed to the beach to set everything up, then texted her where to meet me. My original plan was to pick her up, but I also wanted everything to be set up before she got there.

Right at 7pm, Ashley came walking along the beach. Dressed in sweats and a hoodie, looking as beautiful as ever. "What's all this?"

"Well, I wanted alone time with you and this is more romantic than a restaurant I think. This is okay right?"

Ashley smiled, lips connecting with mine in a deep kiss, "Y/n/n, anything you do is amazing. I love this and I love you so much. Are those flowers?"

"I love you more. Of course, can't have a romantic dinner without flowers."

After dinner, we ended up lying on the beach watching the stars. Ashley cuddled into my side, leaving light kisses along my neck. "How did I get so lucky with you?"

"I'm the one who got lucky Ash. For some reason, you met my grumpy ass and decided yes that is who I want to be with. You are incredible my love, you fill my life with so much love and happiness. I wouldn't give you up for anything in this world. I love you."

"I love you Y/n/n. I will never get over this side of you. Your grumpy ass is stuck with me for life, just gotta make it official."

I laughed, tapping her nose. It was mostly a joke, Ashley knew that I would propose likely in the next couple of months. I just wanted it to be perfect and not that she knew, but I wanted both her team and her family there. "Soon my love."

----

It had been a few weeks since I started coming to camp with Ashley. Since she told me I was kind of intimidating, I was trying to be more friendly. It wasn't the easiest thing, I had always been more withdrawn and perceived as grumpy or tough. I wanted her team to like me so I was trying. They were important to her so I wanted to at least make an effort to get along with them.

Most of them still kept a bit of a distance from me. They were friendly and included me when I was around, but there was still some unsureness on their part. Emily on the other hand seemed to make it her mission to annoy me as much as possible. In a way, it was nice that she didn't seem to mind my so-called grumpiness. It was also incredibly annoying. Despite that, I had a soft spot for her.

Emily ran at me the moment Ashley untangled herself to go get a drink, managing to jump on me before I could stop her, "Emilyyy, get off."

My hair was messed up before Emily dropped back to the ground, tongue sticking out at me.

"Grump."

"Irritating."

"Yeah yeah whatever, you love it. Some of the girls and I are going shopping, you wanna come?"

"That is the last thing I want to do. Shopping is my nightmare and I already do enough of it with Ash." Emily looked slightly disappointed which made me feel guilty. I also realised this could be a good opportunity to develop my relationship with at least some of them. I couldn't bring myself to go shopping so I suggested the next thing I could think of. "I could meet you for lunch or coffee instead if you guys are doing that."

"It's a date. I'll text you when we're heading for lunch."

Ashley popped up next to me, making me jump slightly at her sudden presence, "You going on a date with someone else?"

Emily wrapped her arm around my shoulder which I instantly tried to push off, but she just wrapped it around tighter. I didn't have the energy for a fight so just let it go. "Yup, I'm stealing your girl."

"You and whoever else you're dragging shopping."

Of course, Ashley got excited at the idea of shopping and decided to go along with them. It wasn't a surprise, Ashley loved shopping and it made Emily go away so I was happy. Now I just had to get her to let me stay back. "Finally. Don't even ask, don't pout, it's not going to work. I'm not coming shopping, you have your girls, I'm going to the gym. Go have fun baby, I'll be there for lunch. I love you."

"Fine, I'll carry my own bags. Just this once. I love you and thank you for trying. By the way, I think Em really likes you."

"She alright I guess. Now go."

Throughout lunch, Ashley was on one side of me and Emily was on the other. Which meant Emily annoyed me while Ashley laughed at me. I admit it helped with the nerves, and stopped me from thinking too much about everything. Emily poked my cheek over and over until I slapped her hand away, poking her cheek instead. I unsuccessfully looked at Ashley for help, her being distracted in conversation.

I groaned, leaning back, trying to be as dramatic as possible, "Why are you hellbent on annoying me? You're like the annoying little sister I never wanted."

"Because I can and you're stuck with me as long as you're with Ash."

"Dammit, that means I'm stuck with you for life."

Emily stopped her annoyance, smiling at me instead, "You going to be with our Ashley for the rest of your life?"

"That's the plan."

A hand landed on my shoulder, running down my arm as lips pressed against my cheek, "I like that plan."

My hand ran along her thigh, kissing her cheek, "I do too."

"Alright, before things get even more gross. How did you two meet? I don't think we ever heard that story."

---

I crawled up the bed, settling myself on top of Ashley, letting out an appreciative groan as her fingers ran through my hair. This trying to be nicer thing was a lot of work. It had meant being more aware of my actions or how I held myself around them. I had never had to put that much thought into myself before. It was honestly exhausting.

"You know I would give up hockey in a heartbeat for you. I miss you so much."

"I know you would, I would do the same, but we both know we would be miserable not doing what we love. What's wrong? You get like this when somethings wrong."

"Ugh, I know. I'm just looking forward to the day when distance isn't part of our relationship. I'm just tired. Putting effort into being nicer and less intimidating is exhausting."

Ashley peppered my cheek with kisses, ending with a soft peck to my lips, "Well you're doing an amazing job Y/n/n. Half the team loves you already and the rest are on the way. You know I appreciate you right? How much you're trying to get along with them."

"You mean the world to me, Ash. Even if it's exhausting or hard, I would do anything for you. This team means a lot to you so it's important to me to get along with them. I'm just sorry it took longer than it should have."

"I'm just happy all the people I love get along."

We spent a while cuddling and making out. There weren't many words spoken, we were just enjoying time together after a couple of crazy days on her end. In our jobs that was the reality, where we barely saw each other all day, only to fall asleep minutes after getting to bed. It left me missing Ashley even though I spent every night cuddled up with her. I missed the awake cuddles, the soft kisses or not-so-soft kisses, the light touches, the comfortable silence, and the random conversations. I could have stayed there all night, but there was team bonding tonight so we had to drag ourselves down to Alyssa and Alex's room.

Everyone was waiting already, fighting over what team bonding was going to be. I made myself comfortable on the floor, leaning back against the wall while Ashley went to join in on the fight. I must have zoned out watching her because I didn't notice Kristie sitting next to me until a hand waved in front of my face.

"Sorry."

"Don't be. I get like that with Sam all the time. You make her incredibly happy, you know that right?"

"All I want is for her to be happy so I will do everything in my power to make sure she is. Seeing Ashley happy, makes me happy."

Kristie pat my shoulder, "That's what I like to hear. Keep her that way."

"Yes ma'am."

Ashley had run back to our room for a deck of cards so I was left alone with her team. Since lunch the other day, I had gotten closer to some of the younger girls, but the veteran players were still a work in progress. I hadn't actually been alone with them pretty much ever. Honestly, I felt kind of awkward, like I needed to clarify that I didn't hate them or apologise for being so standoffish, "Look um I know we got off on the wrong foot-"

Alex interrupted me pretty much instantly, "Hey don't worry about it, we've seen how you are with Ash. You may seem grumpy and mean, but really you're a big softy. You treat Ashley like royalty so we like you. You also put up with Emily so you can't be that bad."

"Yeah well, she does that to me. Look I may seem grumpy or uninterested, but I don't mean to. I really like you guys. Even Emily."

"Hey!"

"Also, before you even give me any sort of talk. Ash is my forever, I plan to marry her one day soon, to spend the rest of my life with her. I would never do anything to jeopardize that. I would hurt myself before I ever dreamt of hurting her."

"Good. Welcome to the family Y/n."

Ashley came back soon after the conversation had ended, settling herself in my lap to whisper in my ear, "You okay?"

"I'm more than good my love."

#uswnt x reader #uswnt imagine #woso imagines #woso x reader #uswnt imagines #ashley sanchez #ashley sanchez x reader

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