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winterisakiller · 9 days

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Sunflower, Book 1, Chapter 21

Tom Hiddleston x OFC Series rated: M Chapter warnings: We get a it pissy, Flashback- nudity, female nipples, A dick gets touched a wee bit.

AN:It's getting hot in here! Chapter warning- Our flashback finally has both nipples and dicks. Well, a dick. Very short mention of light foreplay and dirty talk. The flashback isn't long enough to be of anything more than once again blueballing readers. How long do you think I can do this before you actually get to the smut?

On a little more serious note, Kit is struggling. I'm sorry for anything that comes from me that is more unhinged than is normal though at this point, more unhinged than is normal is becoming the normal.

Masterlist Kofi AO3

~~~~~<3~~~~~<3~~~~~<3~~~~~<3~~~~~<3~~~~~<3

Mia woke warm and comfortable. It wasn’t how she usually woke. She tended to blast the AC at night or crack open the window during the winter. Anything to get it cold while she fell asleep. It was always something she regretted in the morning though when she had to drag herself from bed but the contrast of being warm and cozy under the blankets and the cold air in the room made for the best sleep.

This was something she could get used to, she decided as arms tightened around her. She had no business thinking that though. Tom traveled much for his career, even if they had managed to work out for real, how often would she get to wake up with him, tucked into his arms like this?

They didn’t fall asleep in this position. They never did. More often than not in their short time together, she went to bed before Tom did. He often had late night calls and business to attend to thanks to the time difference but every morning she had woken in his arms and slipped herself free.

Their life was quickly setting into a weird sense of normal. It was happening faster than she had been prepared for. They were strangers, friends and spouses all at the same time, changing with the fleeting moments. It felt like they were strangers less and less though.

Mia would wake up too early and make breakfast for her and Sally. Tom would wake shortly after and go down to the complex gym where he would run. Running was something Mia never really seemed to enjoy but Tom would spend quite some time running every morning.

He needed to stay fit for his next project, he had told her. Running was something he enjoyed regardless but for his character he needed to be lean and fit. It was far easier for him to maintain the physique rather than let it slip and have to play physical catch up.

Pinching at her belly, Mia knew it wouldn’t hurt her to join him. She could stand to drop some weight. It was just a matter of time before she was face to face with how horrible people can be when talking about women’s bodies. If she had a flat stomach, maybe they would have less to pick at.

Who was she kidding? They would find something. They always did and she liked carbs too much. Plus, she had grown a whole ass child. No matter what she did, she didn’t think she’d have that flat stomach of her teens back again.

After Tom had his morning run, he would come back for a shower and a light breakfast. An egg, some toast and fruit usually was what he would have. Mia would sometimes have it ready for him when he came back up but other times she lost track of time and he made it for himself without complaint.

Every time he came back though, he would greet her with an arm around her waist and a squeeze of his hand on hers. It was a greeting she began to look forward to every morning.

Mia sat at the table, plate of pancakes and eggs in front of her. Sally was across from her and they were practicing spelling ‘Sally’ and writing Mia’s phone number on a dry erase board as they ate.

Sure, it would be quicker and easier to eat then practice, one task at a time but Sally was in a learning mood. Mia had long ago learned that when a child wanted to learn, you took advantage of that for as long as you could.

Ride that wave while it lasted.

Once Sally had these things down, Mia would start teaching their address. In handful of weeks Sally would be starting kindergarten and Mia wanted her to be as prepared as she could be going into it.

“What do you want for your birthday?” Mia asked as Sally finished writing her phone number again.

“Someone’s got a birthday coming up?” Tom asked from the doorway. His hair was dark with water from the shower still and sticking up in every direction from being towel dried. Mia had yet to get used to seeing him like that, tee shirt clinging lightly to his still slightly damp chest in places.

“In two days!” Sally was great about not annoying people wit her upcoming birthdays.

Mia had always been thankful for that but it also made her feel guilty. They never had the money to go big. Birthdays were always small affairs with little homemade cakes and dollar store toys. If Mia was lucky, she could get one or two quality toys. Ashley would pull through usually with something that wouldn’t break in two weeks.

“Well, what are you doing for your birthday?” Tom asked, focused intently on the small girl that had unexpectedly became a part of his life.

“I want a pool party!” Sally had seen a birthday pool party in a show and she had talked about off and on since. Mia had hoped that she had forgotten.

“Well, if that’s what the birthday girl wants, that’s what she’ll get!” Tom loved birthdays. His sister had warned him against becoming over eager plenty of times when it came to things for her own children. “What is the birthday girl going to want for her birthday?”

“A pony!” Mia cringed back. Sally was treating it like a game. She probably thought it was. Mia was terrified however that Tom would take the request seriously.

“Do you even know how to ride a pony?” Tom leaned forward and raised an eyebrow dramatically.

Please be joking. Please be joking. Mia wasn’t sure there was a graceful way to jump in if he wasn’t joking.

“Noooo.” Sally giggled.

“Have you ever even touched a pony?” Tom asked, lowering the eyebrow and raising the other. It was comical and Mia couldn’t help the smile that tugged at the corners of her mouth.

Please don’t buy her a pony. Please, Please, do not by her a fucking pony.

“Nooo.” Sally giggled harder.

“Well maybe a pony would be something to work up to.” Tom leaned back and put his eyebrows back where they belonged. “But who knows what birthday miracles may happen.”

~~~~~<3

Mia waited for Tom outside of Sally’s door. At least for the time being, Tom was the requested guest star of bedtimes and Mia had been pushed aside. Sure, she could have felt jealous or threatened by it but she instead relished in the help.

She was tired from working her shift. Her feet hurt and the dress was uncomfortable but she made it home just in time for bedtime. She gave her hug and kisses and goodnights but Sally wanted the bedtime story from Tom and Tom alone once again.

Mia tried not to worry about how Sally would cope with things when Tom left again. It would be time to take him to the airport again before they knew it. She wasn’t looking forward to it at all. Sally would miss him. Mia would miss the help greatly.

Mia would miss him greatly too.

Tom being there meant she didn’t have to pay for a babysitter, though this was the first day he was on his own without Gretchen relieving him for part of the day or supervising. He had insisted he was fine with watching Sally while he was there.

He reminded her again and again that he was her step father, even if Sally didn’t know that yet. It was a job he insisted he took seriously and so far, it seemed that he did. He had all but begged her to trust him and begrudgingly, she did.

“Good Night.” Tom said, stepping out of the door and closing it behind him, nearly walking into Mia. “Oh-”

“Do not buy her a pony.”

Tom laughed and wrapped his arm around her waist. Mia didn’t find anything funny though she let him lead her away from the door and toward the couch. Bare feet padded along as she waited for Tom to say anything.

“I mean it Tom, don’t buy her a pony.”

“I’m not going to buy her a pony.” Tom said as he sat down on the couch. He made an effort to pull her down with him but she stood ridged. “What’s wrong.”

“Tom, I am her mother.”

“I know that.”

“Then do not make birthday plans or promises or anything without clearing it with me first.”

“But I-”

“Do you even know if she’s got friends to invite to a pool party? Who would show up? Or the logistics of planning a kid’s birthday party? I don’t know if they’re done differently in England but they’re a fucking nightmare here.”

“I’m sorry, I-”

“We don’t have anyone to invite. Let alone on short notice. Do not put some grand party ideas in her head when I can’t deliver on that and even if you can, who’s to say if I can next year. Or the year after. She is my daughter and we have our ways of doing things.”

“Okay.” Tom raised his hands up in submission. “I didn’t mean to overstep. I got excited is all.”

“Good.” Mia didn’t know what else to say. She was still angry, she’d spent most of her shift fuming about it and worrying about what other promises are being made without her being there to intercept it. “Good.”

“What can I do to fix it?” Tom tugged at her hand, urging her to sit with him.

“Just keep it small. And ask first.”

He noticed then that she was still wearing the short cocktail dress that was her uniform. Her legs were on full display. She wasn’t particularly tall however the length of the skirt did wonders at highlighting the length and shape of her legs. “Why haven’t you changed yet?”

“I was distracted.”

“By your need to yell at me?” Tom joked.

“Yes.” She huffed.

“Go change. Then you can yell at me more from something more comfortable, if you want.”

~~~~~<3

Mia changed out of the reveling dress in the closet with the door shut behind her. It was silly, they were married and yet she she was still shy around him. He was a attractive man who could have and did have actresses and she was everyday normal.

She slipped on a pair of athletic shorts that were used for sleep far more than they were used for working out. It was just a matter of time before her metabolism came crashing down and she’d have to start working out or learn to again love, well- like, her changing body.

For now, walking miles on the casino floor in four inch heels and skipping her mid shift meal to avoid the bloat in the dress worked together to keep her weight within what she felt was acceptable.

Just because she thought it was acceptable didn’t mean she was ready to expose a sober Tom to every little bulge, sag and stretch mark that came with having grown a child. She’d seen pictures of the woman he had dated before her, she was too weak to resist looking. She was fit and trim and tall and fucking beautiful.

That was the sort of woman men like Tom looked good with. They were the kind of women men like Tom liked. They belonged on red carpets and in magazines.

Mia threw out her insecurities as best she could while she threw her bra in the hamper. She hated the feeling of taking it off. It did a great job of supporting her breasts that had never really recovered from a near year of breastfeeding. She had no other way to explain it but that they felt deflated, empty but with a good bra, they were pretty damn nice still.

She slipped on a oversized Tshirt and pulled her largely deflated curls into a messy pony tail. With a overnight shift coming up tomorrow, she had enlisted Tom to help keep her awake so that she’d sleep in.

~~~~~<3

Tom folded over her as she ran her fingers up his chest, taking in the feeling of his muscles as they moved. His head swam as he took her nipple into his mouth again. Tugging, pulling and licking, he teased delicate moans from her throat.

“You’re so beautiful.” He whispered as he kissed his way up to her neck.

Her back arched under him as he ran his fingers up and down her sides. Each breath she took caused her nipples to brush against his chest.

“I want you.” She pleaded as she blindly worked his buckle open. “Please.”

She was like an animal pawing to get to some vital resource. It took far longer than she wanted to get the belt free. Tom grew impatient and uncomfortable with waiting and yanked it free himself.

As he tossed it behind him, she palmed him through his pants. She moaned at the feeling and it would be a lie to say he didn’t take satisfaction in that. He wasn’t a poorly endowed man by any means, he knew that but having a woman moan at the feel alone was a great complement.

“Please.” Oh, he liked hearing her beg for him.

He also liked the feeling of her fingers wrapping around him. He hadn’t noticed when she had gotten his trousers unbuttoned, let alone unzipped but good god, her fingers felt good wrapped around his shaft.

“Let me get these off.”

~~~~~<3~~~~~<3

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winterisakiller · 17 days

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Sunflower, Book 1, Chapter 18

Tom Hiddleston x OFC Series rated: E Chapter warnings: Flashback-It's getting even hotter in here. There's a nipple! The flashback is sexy but hardly crossing to rated M. AN: Kit exists still. Yay? Can you believe Book One is about halfway done?!

Masterlist Kofi

~~~~~<3

It was nice having him back. She had missed him. More than she had thought she did. More than she expected.

That was something she needed to tell him today. It was terrifying to consider admitting it to him though. It felt like if she told him, it would give him some sort of power over her.

Was that safe? Was it so bad if it wasn’t?

“Tom?” Her voice was strangled, weak and oh how she hated it. He didn’t answer, probably didn’t hear her as he organized socks and folded underwear neatly.

Mia was about to call out for him again, stronger she hoped but he called for her first. “How do you feel about travel?”

“What?” The question was random.

“You and Sally- do you two travel often?” Tom leaned back, looking out of the closet at her from where he sat on the floor before unfolding himself and standing to move a few more things around.

“No?” She stretched the word out. “Sally hasn’t even been outside of the city.”

“Why not?” Tom stood back, admiring his little piece of space. He had a space in this home now and turning that idea around in his mind tickled him, bringing a smile to his lips that quickly faded when Mia sighed, drawing his eyes to her.

“I haven’t exactly had the time.” As Tom made his way out of the closet and toward the bed, questions were clear on his face. “I’m lucky if I get two weeks of paid time off a year.”

“But for holidays?” He took his time approaching her.

“I work in a casino.” Mia laughed though bitterness tinged it. “I don’t get any holidays. I get 80 hours of paid time off and have to hope I get a few days left over to use for fun toward the end of the year after all the time off one of us being sick.”

“80 hours?” Tom knew Americans tended to take less time off than was healthy or normal, in his opinion, but that was not much at all. If they typically work 8 hour days and five day work weeks, that meant they only took an average of - “That’s two weeks? And you have to use it for sick leave too?”

“Yep.” Mia didn’t like how this conversation felt. “That’s normal.”

“That is not normal.”

“What’s normal to you?” It was easy to think they were the same, once she ignored the financial differences between them but it hadn’t occurred to her in the slightest that the cultural differences would potentially be fundamental.

“Like six weeks once all’s said and done.”

“That’s so long!” No wonder there were so many international guests at the resorts. They had time to travel around the world. “What do people even do with all that time?”

“We live,” Tom sat on the bed next to her. She was sitting cross legged on the edge of the bed -their bed. He was so close that her knee brushed against his thigh. “I can’t imagine having so much less.”

“We make the best of it.” Mia shrugged. “It’s not like wishing for more will make it change. And most of us can’t afford to take unpaid time off anyway.”

“If that wasn’t a factor, what would you like to do?”

This conversation felt more intimate than those they’d had before. This was personal and while they sometimes had deeper conversations on the phone, it felt different having him there with her.

“I don’t know.” Mia leaned back on her hands, stretching her abdomen and trying to remind herself to stop slouching. “Travel maybe. This is all I’ve ever known, working. I can’t really picture anything different.”

“Would you want to go to London?” The question was out of his mouth before he had a chance to consider if he was pushing too much. It had caught her off guard too.

“Sure.” She said after a moment of thinking. “If I could ever manage the time off. I’d have to get a passport and figure out time off and how to afford it. It would be a whole thing.”

“You don’t have a passport?” Tom had always assumed most people had passports in America. It was certainly true of his home.

“Nope,” Mia chuckled. “I never really thought we would need them. It’s not like I’m leaving the country any time soon.”

Tom rested his hand on her thigh, bringing her eyes to his. “You’re in a international marriage now.”

“Yeah, but-”

“Mia, there’s times where it may be advantageous for you to travel with me in the next year.”

“For your career?” Mia didn’t know what she was expecting but she had hoped it was something different, something more.

He realized he went the wrong route. It would take time to learn how they each communicated and avoid eachother’s landmines.

“No! No. I just-” Tom decided to restart. “I told my mum about you. I- she’d like to meet you.”

“Oh, does she know? Like, the real story?” Mia didn’t push his hand off her.

Tom laughed, “Yes, and she’d like to meet you.”

“Is that a good ‘she wants to meet you’ or a bad ‘she wants to meet you’?”

“The good one.” The idea hadn’t occurred to him but Tom was flying by the seat of his pants. This seemed to be how he made the best choices anyway. “Mia, I’ve got a trip back home- London home, coming up in a few weeks.”

She knew that, they had talked about that before he had left but still, it made her sad. He had just gotten there and he was going to be leaving her again. These were things that were scheduled before he had even known her, let alone married her though. Had she any right to be sad?

He had to go back home, just as he said. Las Vegas wouldn’t ever be home for him, she was sure of that. There wasn’t a lot of acting that happened in Las Vegas and surely he would need to act again. He had to work and live his life still.

“I know,” She said after a long pause. “You can’t stay here forever. You’ve got family, friends and work that you’ve got to take care of.”

“You’re family now.” Tom pressed, fingers flexing against the soft of her thigh in a firm grip that lasted for only a second. “Both you and Sally. I would like for you to come with me.”

“I can’t.” Mia’s heart sank. “Tom, I-”

“I know, I know.” Tom sighed, withdrawing his hand. “But I would like it if you could. If by any chance you could take the time off-”

“I can’t.” Mia interrupted.

“Hypothetically.” Tom continued talking over her, “How long would it take to get passports?”

“A few weeks or so? Maybe a few months. Our government doesn’t move fast.”

Tom’s shoulders slumped. Even if he could convince her to trust him with everything, including her financial ability to survive totally, she wouldn’t be able to go with. Oh well, it had been worth a thought. He hadn’t realized how much he wanted to introduce his little American family to his home until the idea had formulated.

“Would you consider getting them?”

“I guess,” She still wasn’t sold on the fact that they would need them. She couldn’t imagine needing them or having the ability to take the time off to make use of them. “It would be nice to have the option to go if things ever lined up.”

“Thank you.” Tom reached for her hand, weaving his fingers between hers before pulling her hand up to his lips to leave a soft kiss on her knuckles.

“Why do you do that?” She hadn’t meant to ask.

“Because I want to?” Worry flashed across his face. Had he offended her? “Is that alright?”

“People don’t do things like that.” Mia quickly stood up but his hand on hers kept her from escaping into the living room.

“They do if they care.” Tom’s voice was soft and firm, something she would struggle with trying to describe to Ashley later. “And I care.”

Tom left her standing there, stunned by the admission. Here she was, struggling all morning to try and find a way to tell him that she missed him and was glad he had returned. But he just threw out an admission like that as if it was nothing when if he had meant it, it could be everything.

He had managed to say those things quickly and easily. It was effortless for him to simply say he cared. Small affections came easily from him. If he kept that up, she was in danger of really falling beyond the point of return.

Was that his goal? Was he being honest? Acting in good faith? Did he really care or was he pretending, hoping that if he pretended long enough the feelings would become real?

Was she worrying about it too much? What if he felt exactly as he said? What if she really did fall in love with him? What if? What if?

What if?

~~~~~<3

Tom was lounging on the couch, his phone in hand when she joined him fifteen or so minutes later. The couch wasn’t the most comfortable one in the world. Part of her wished she had not been so stubborn and gotten one from a nicer store but oh well, what’s done was done.

Tom didn’t seem to mind. He hadn’t commented on the comfort level of the couch. Mia did feel a little bad about how poorly he fit on the couch though, seeing him overflowing off it. He was simply so tall and lanky that he didn’t fit well.

Glancing up, he smiled at her as she sat down. Sally sat on the floor in front of the couch introducing her newest bear to her other stuffed animals all lined up sitting behind a small army of cardboard desks.

“She’s holding class.” Tom informed her with an amused smile.

“Ah, a regular activity.” Mia grabbed her book and fidgeted with it. When they were comfortable with eachother, it was wonderful but it was finding those moments that Mia still struggled with. Tom seemed to fit right in and that terrified her.

“I’ve got a script to pick up in London.” Tom locked his phone at set it on the arm of the couch.

“What for?”

“Another Marvel project.”

“Do you like it?” She wasn’t sure what exactly she was trying to ask.

“The character?” Tom smiled warmly, turning to face her more. “Very much so, yes. He’s very Shakespearean and there’s much depth and complexity to still explore with him.”

“It sounded like you did in interviews.” She said before thinking.

“You watched my interviews?” Tom’s eyebrow rose and she realized they never were quite level.

“I mean, I- a few clips, here and there. I just-” Taking a deep breath, she willed herself to calm down and breathe. What did she have to be embarrassed by? “I wanted to get to know you more.”

“Ah.” The answer didn’t seem to disappoint him though he didn’t say more. He didn’t need to. The soft smile on his face said plenty for him.

“And I missed you.” Finally, she said it. It felt good to say it. It needed to be said. He deserved to hear it. They deserved for it to be said.

Warm fingers thread through her’s. When her eyes met his, he squeezed her hand with a smile. “I’m glad it wasn’t just me.”

~~~~~<3~~~~~~<3

Tom gripped her ass under the skirt of her dress. The silky panties she wore were smooth under his hands but not nearly as smooth as her skin would be. He wanted to tease her and savor her but with how much he had drank, he feared quicker would be better.

Fingers struggled with buttons. It felt like the back of the dress was fastened with every possible fastening at the same time, designed by the devil to hamper men from sealing the marriage. He would swear he felt cords and buttons and a zipper track. What he wanted was the dress off of her.

“Sorry, Darling.” Tom mumbled the words into the swell of her breast he had been kissing.

With both hands, he ripped the back open. It was harder than he expected, taking a few yanks to rip the fabric to the small of her back. with the tension that had been holding her breasts in place gone, they sank slightly into a more relaxed, natural position.

Mia was self conscious for a moment. Her body had been through stresses and showed the wear from a life lived. Though she had never been uncomfortable with the size of her breasts, she knew they lacked the fullness of many women in their twenties.

Her breasts were natural and that excited him. Pulling the bodice down, he was rewarded for his efforts with a warm palmful of soft flesh. He took a pink nipple in his mouth and ran his tongue over the nub.

He needed her and he needed her now.

~~~~~<3

Tag List: @winterisakiller, @alexakeyloveloki, @jennyggggrrr, @dangertoozmanykids101, @tilltheendwilliwrite @tinchentitri @wizardcherryblossom @buttercupcookies-blog @violethaze @kats72 @soulpiercing @evedia

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winterisakiller · 17 days

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Fanfic writers are like crows. If you give them treats (comments) they will bring you shiny things (fanfic)

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winterisakiller · 23 days

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Sunflower, Book 1, Chapter 17

Tom Hiddleston x OFC Series rated: E Chapter warnings: Flashback- is it getting hot in here or is it just me? Let's be real folks, I've been lowkey blueballing you on the smut for months, it's just getting worse this week. The flashback is sexy but hardly crossing to rated M. AN: Ladies, gents, spoons, sporks and forks- Sunflower is here! Let's see how Mia's anxiety can fuck shit up *this week* **shuuuuhhhh I totally didn't get the chapter number wrong for a min***

Masterlist Kofi

~~~~~<3

It felt weird to have Tom in the apartment again. The same bags he had left with were stacked neatly by the wall as he set to work helping her make breakfast. Tom was humming as he peeled potatoes, not many but more than Mia had initially planned to make for her and Sally.

He said he missed her. She hadn’t had a chance to say it back though, the words stuck in her paralyzed throat. Instead she found herself trapped in his eyes and then he was kissing her like it would give him life. She had kissed him back.

What did that mean? What did it all mean?

If she asked him, he would tell her it meant they were married and just doing what married people did or some variation of it, she was sure. But it had to have some deeper meaning. Was it true?

She wanted to tell him she had missed him too but the moment was gone. It would be weird now to say it, wouldn’t it? They had moved on from kissing to breakfast.

The moment was gone.

~~~~~<3

“Tom!” Sally’s voice came from the hall, sleep replaced by excitement as soon as her eyes hit him.

“Sally!” Tom matched her enthusiasm, putting down the bowl of potato shreds.

He took a second to rinse his hands, sending shredded potatoes down the drain and didn’t bother drying them. He rushed around the counter as Sally ran to him. Her small frame was enveloped in his arms as he lifted her up. Giggles filled the apartment as he spun her around, letting the small girl’s momentum drive the dance.

Mia’s heart couldn’t help but open to him just a little bit more. What if she could have this for more than a year? What if this could be her forever? What if this could be Sally’s forever?

Shaking her head, Mia tried to banish the thoughts. Their relationship needed to crawl before it could walk, let alone run. It was too soon to be thinking of forever.

“I missed you.” Sally said so easily what Mia had been trying to figure out how to say herself for the last hour.

“I missed you too.” Tom squeezed the little girl in one last hug before setting her back down. “Why don’t you go get dressed while we finish making breakfast?”

Sally ran off to do just that. She was young but a dutiful child. It didn’t take a lot to set her on the right path for the morning, something Mia had always been truely thankful for.

~~~~~<3

"Did Tom bring us flowers?” Sally asked, sitting at the counter while she ate.

Tom and Mia sat at the table but Sally couldn’t be convinced to join them. The counter was by far the neatest place to eat her meals, as far as Sally was concerned. It wasn’t a battle Mia thought was worth fighting, so she didn’t.

“I got them for your Mom.” Tom said and quickly added when Sally’s face began to fall, “I got you something else.”

“What? What!” Sally was on cloud nine having her funny talking friend back.

“After breakfast!” Mia interjected. The last thing she needed was whatever Tom brought getting covered in pancake syrup.

“You heard her, after breakfast.” Mia appreciated how easily Tom seemed to fall into the step parent role.

Was that what he was doing? Would he accept such a title? Would she be alright giving him that title? Did it matter at this point, anyway?

~~~~~<3

When dishes were safely in the sink and sticky hands and faces washed, Tom finally went to his suitcase. Carefully, he pulled a gift bag out and presented it to Sally.

“Can I open it?” She asked, fingers picking ever so carefully at the tissue paper.

“Of course.” Tom smiled at Sally, kneeling on the ground next to her.

Mia watched over them from where she leaned against the counter as Sally pulled blobs of tissue paper out. Colorful fluffs of paper fell to the floor around her as she uncovered the bear hidden inside.

It was dark blue and held a stuffed Lady Liberty in his paws. His white shirt had the classic ‘I <3 NY’ decal on the front. The bear wore soft dark plastic sunglasses and looked terribly soft.

“I love it.” Sally squished the stuffed animal to her chest and seemed to curl in on it in her enthusiasm.

As soon as she uncurled from the tight hug, she launched herself at Tom again. Little arms wrapped around his neck as she knocked him off his feet and onto the ground. He caught her and returned her hug as she thanked him repeatedly.

Was this what his future would be? Bringing home trinkets and flowers for his wife and daughter when he returned from his travels? A warm greeting and appreciation waiting at home?

This was a life he could get used to.

That was terrifying.

~~~~~<3

Sally sat happily coloring with her bear. In her game, the bear was telling her what colors to use where and she was being a very good listener. The page she was working on was a coloring sight word page where she was practicing color name recognition in preperation for kindergarten starting shortly.

Mia reminded herself again that she needed to transfer Sally’s enrollment from the school she had been planing on attending in a few months to the one near their new home.

Moving was such a hassle, she thought as she started the dish washer. It was worth it though. She couldn’t help but be happy she gave in when she looked around.

“Can we talk?” Tom asked, leaning against the counter. “Catch up a bit?”

Mia hated it when people said things like that. Her anxiety instantly spiked and she worried. With how common anxiety even was anymore, it amazed her that people still opened conversations with ‘can we talk’.

“Sure?” Mia followed him into her bedroom as Tom carried his bags in.

Blankets were bunched around on the bed. She hadn’t gotten around to making it yet this morning.

Tom glanced around but didn’t mention the mess of dirty laundry tossed into the corner. She had thought she had time to clean up before he got there.

“What did you want to talk about?” She swung the door mostly closed behind her. Being alone with him, or at least mostly alone made her heart beat faster. She told herself to stop acting like a schoolgirl.

“I’m not sure how to say this. I don’t want to intrude but also-”

“It’s a bit late for not intruding, don’t you think?” Mia smiled and tried to laugh to soften the blow of her poor attempt at a joke. He intruded the moment he decided he was against an annulment. “That ship has sailed.”

“I suppose so.” Tom chuckled, running his fingers through his short hair. The morning sun was strong through the bedroom window, bathing him in the warm light. The bedrooms got direct morning sun and the living space was lit up perfectly with sunlight during the day. Right now, that morning sun was playing on his sharp features and highlighting the golden and auburn hues in his hair.

He could play one of God’s most beautiful angels. Perhaps, he could play Lucifer himself. Was he a blessing or a devil?

Mia had to get her mind under control. This was getting ridiculous.

“I want- I think it would be best if I made this my home base.” The words came carefully. “I think it would be better for us if this was my home too.”

“Better for us?”

“For getting to know eachother. Building our relationship.” Tom smiled at her. “I don’t think we can really give this a fair shot if we live separate.”

“What are you saying?” Mia didn’t give him a chance to answer. “Are you saying you want to move in?”

Tom’s smile lit up his face. “Yes! I want to live with you as man and wife. What better way to get to know eachother more?”

“You don’t think this is too fast?” Mia’s head was spinning.

“Hasn’t that ship sailed as well?” Oh he was good, she had to admit it.

“What does that even mean? Like, really mean?” Mia sat on the bed as Tom unzipped the suitcase.

“That’s a ‘yes’ then?” Tom asked.

“Yeah, fine.” It was fast, too fast, but what was the point in arguing with him.

He would argue until she gave up anyway. The man took their marriage seriously and if he thought they needed to live together than he would be as adamant about it as he was about even remaining married in the first place.

“Is there space in the closet for me?” Tom asked. “I don’t have a lot of clothes but I’ll probably bring more when I come back next time.”

“Just shove stuff aside and pick a side.” She wasn’t really attached to any section of the closet, she hadn’t lived in the apartment long enough to have things like a preferred side of the closet. It wasn’t like she had enough clothes to really fill it anyway. There was more than enough room for both of them. “There’s hangers if you need- I’ve got a lot of extras.”

“Thanks.” Tom waisted no time in slipping shirts onto hangers. His suits were in zipped bags with plastic hangers just waiting to be hung up.

“I don’t have much dresser space.”

“We can pick up another dresser.” Tom hung his pants over the hangers and left what couldn’t be hung in his suitcase for now. “That’s not a problem.”

“How was New York?” Mia asked, not wanting to leave him but also feeling awkward sitting on her bed and watching him put his clothes away in her closet. No, their closet.

“It was alright. Mostly late night shows.”

“Is it stressful?” Mia picked at the blankets.

“It can be. There’s a good bit of pressure with everything going on,” Tom shrugged, “But I’ve got standing relationships with a few of them so it’s not as bad as it could be.”

Tom set his suitcases in the closet, the carry on nestled within the larger.

“How long will you be here this time?” Mia cringed at how that sounded. “Not that I’m trying to get you to go, I just-”

“You want me here?” Tom looked back at her with his eyebrow raised.

On impulse she threw a pillow at him. Her face was hot and she dreaded to know how red it looked. She wanted to back peddle, to tell him how he was assuming things or putting words in her mouth but there was no way she could do that without swinging wildly the other way and sounding like an ass.

“You don’t have to answer.” Tom’s laugh told her that he already knew the answer anyway.

“I don’t not want you here.” Was the answer she settled on giving.

“I’ll take it.” Tom’s smile made her smile, she couldn’t help it.

Oh God, was she falling for him?

~~~~~<3

The springs in the bed squeaked as Tom all but threw her onto it. He loomed over her, admiring how her brown hair fanned out around her, contrasting with the cream bedding and the white of her dress. Her face was flushed, it had been all night but now it looked even better now, looking up at him.

There was something intoxicating about standing over a flushed woman laying on his bed. Her dress was bunched around her thighs. It had long been one of Tom’s favorite sights. This though, her being his bride, made the sight oh so much better. Tom couldn’t help but run his fingertips up the soft flesh of her thighs.

He traced the tan line that marked where shorts hand cut the sun’s harsh power. It had been a while since he had seen something as simple as a unintentional tan line.

She was so beautifully normal and he loved her already for it.

As she rose up on her elbows, he admired how the change of position pushed her breasts up.

“Something wrong?” She asked.

“Not even a little.” Tom planted his hands on either side of her waist and leaned forward and into her.

Using one arm to support herself, she ran her other hand up his chest. Her fingers wrapped around his neck and pulled him to her. The kiss started sweet, a reminder of romance she had begun to think was only for story books and movies.

It quickly became fierce however. These were the kisses that she knew existed but damn, it had been so long since she had kissed someone who was so good at it. She wanted more. Craved it. Needed it.

Tom rolled them, pulling her to straddle him. Just as he had appreciated how she looked sprawled out on the bed, she was caught in a moment of admiration as well.

Never in her life had she slept with a man as good looking as Tom. Now he was her’s and this was her reality. He belonged to her now and she to him. She won the Vegas jackpot.

She could feel how much he wanted her as she rested on his hips. Though that was exciting, just having a man as strong and successful as him under her was enough of a rush in itself. He was beautiful.

Tom rather liked having his wife straddling his lap. This was something he hadn’t thought he could ever have but it was here. She was here. It was his wedding night and she wore a beautiful white dress just for him. He wanted to see on the floor.

Sitting up, he kissed her neck and chest as his arms wrapped around her. Her skin was so soft under his lips. While he worked along her collar bone, she ran her nails through his hair.

She smelled like sunshine, flowers and summer time. She smelled like sunflowers. What a strange, unique choice. What a beautifully her choice.

When he found just the right spot, she couldn’t stop the moan that fell from her lips. That was a sound he wanted to hear her make again and again. Tom was hard in his trousers and she was pressed against him, each shift she made in his lap sending a wave of pleasure through him. She felt good against him, held against his chest, wrapped in his arms, neck against his lips.

He wanted to feel more of her against him. Never in his life, had he wanted to delve into a woman more than he did at that moment. Not once in his life.

Not once.

~~~~~<3

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winterisakiller · 28 days

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Sunflower, Book1, Chapter 16

Tom Hiddleston x OFC Series rated: M Chapter warnings: Our flashback is a bit.. Uhum. Steamy again but not much of a flashback this chapter. AN: Good Day, ladies, gents, sporks and forks. Everyone have a good easter that celebrates? Good! Good! Very good. Well, class- we're spending this chapter with Tom, isn't that wonderful? I know y'all have missed him.

PS- You have @evedia to thank for the bonus chapter this week. I'm an attention whore and they asked for it. Not always a guaranteed success, fyi. ~~~~~<3<3

It was finally Friday. Tom swore he would be back today and Mia was excited for it. He had kept his word, so far at least. He had called every night, sometimes early enough that he was able to read Sally a bedtime story.

She could see it, what their marriage could be like, if she closed her eyes and just trusted. It was just the shape of it, a vague outline waiting to be fleshed out by time and emotions. It was there though and being able to see that gave her hope.

The hope terrified her but maybe, just maybe, it was worth the risk?

She had moved her shifts around, calling in favors long owed to pull it off but she had the night off along with Saturday. It would have been nice to swing Sunday too but she didn’t really have any paid time off to spare for it. It was better than nothing though.

The past few days, when Sally was asleep or playing, Mia had her spent her time watching interviews and press events. Unexpected jealousy clawed at her as she watched him charm and flirt with interviewers but with each video, she learned more about the man she was married to.

Constantly she reminded herself of what he had told her- the man he shows press and the world isn’t exactly the same as the man he is in private. There were small inklings of that difference that she could find.

The man she had gotten to know had a quieter edge to him. He was charming and eager to smile but would be perfectly fine spending an evening sitting, long legs stretched out while reading a book with the lights down low.

While she had known he was an actor, she hadn’t really a grasp of the kind of training he had undergone.

He wasn’t Hollywood. He wasn’t a few lucky breaks out of running hot dishes out from a kitchen and hoping the right person saw him- or whatever the aspiring male actor equivalent was. Or was it the same? He was an actor by training and trade, educated and refined.

Six hours until she had to head to the airport. Nine hours until she was face to face with Tom again. What would being reunited with her husband be like?

~~~~~<3

Tom was exhausted. It was three in the morning on Friday and he was eager to get out of New York City. Usually, he would enjoy his time in the city but he had more important things he needed to be doing, more important places he needed to be.

He had called his mother a few days prior. It was something he knew he should have done sooner but he wasn’t sure exactly what he was going to tell her. Then she found out thanks to a tabloid and it became something he couldn’t put off any more.

Damned gossip rags.

Understandably, she was hurt by missing his wedding and the idea that he had hidden a whole relationship from her. It was a momentary relief when he told her that he hadn’t hidden any relationship from her for about five seconds before the meaning hit.

Finding out your son got sloshed while wallowing in self pity and married a total stranger wasn’t exactly news that would make any mother proud. It was a story that was hard to swallow. She had believed her son to be better than that and, if he was honest, Tom had believed himself to be better than that too. Just as Tom had thought though, she appreciated his dedication to giving the marriage a fair chance.

They had talked for over an hour, catching up. She was eager to learn everything Tom could share about his bride, limited though the information was. It wasn’t enough to paint a true picture of how wonderful Mia was and that frustrated him to an extent. It also renewed his desire to learn even more.

He knew she hadn’t attended any higher education but why not? She was raised in Las Vegas, born in Nevada but why was she still living there? Had she not wanted to move or was it out of her power? Had she not wanted to further her education or was it a access issue?

There was so much still to learn. He wouldn’t let her slip out of his mind again. She wouldn’t be a family he kept on the back burner. There were countless things he didn’t know he didn’t know about her and her life.

That’s why he moved his flight up, taking the earliest flight he could. He had always enjoyed the promotions and engagements that came with his high profile projects but this time he was eager to be done. He wanted to return to the shadows of normalcy. He wanted to return to her.

~~~~<3

Tom propped a little New York stuffed bear on top of his carry on. It didn’t quite fit but he didn’t think anyone would call him on it. There was a benefit to being at the airport at four in the morning- there were less eyes on him. The less eyes, the less pictures and the less questions.

He had been careful so far not to mention Sally when talking to damn near anyone other than his own mother. Children were so delicate and the media was unforgiving at best, brutal at worst. There wasn’t much he could do to protect Mia in the grand scheme of things but he wouldn’t be the first to insist on privacy for a child. He hoped he would be able to do the same for Sally.

In hindsight, doing something as careless as going to the playground as a family was risky. But what was done, was done. It seemed, at least for now, that he had gotten off lucky.

He hadn’t been able to escape being noticed in the airport. It wasn’t terribly surprising considering his presence in the city wasn’t unknown. Still, it frequently felt like an invasion of privacy when fans would ask about the stuffed animal on his bag or about his wife while he was simply trying to get back to her.

Most wished him the best and congratulated him but still, it wasn’t uncommon for them to ask questions that he would not answer. Thankfully it wasn’t as bad as it could have been.

~~~~~<3

With how much he traveled, he should have been able to sleep on flights better than he did that morning. He dozed some but a nap was going to be greatly needed. At least he would be gaining three more hours to the day with the magic of time zones.

Would it be selfish to hope to use part of that gained time for an afternoon nap? Tom wasn’t sure. What he did know was that he was run ragged and tired. It was hard to be as kind to those who recognized him as he wanted to be.

~~~~~<3

Airport flowers didn’t look as great as they did in movies. That surprised Tom, as he stood in front of the display. It wasn’t a thing he had ever gave any thought to before. After spending far too long, he decided airport flowers were a bit of movie magic.

He would have to stop by a florist on his way home.

Home.

What a thought that was? He had a home in America. It wasn’t anywhere convenient for most of his work considering his contract with Marvel but it was a home. The idea of managing two homes could quickly become overwhelming but for now, it was what was right.

Would she be alright with him considering the apartment his home too? It was probably something he would need to ask her but how do you go about asking your wife if her home is yours?

~~~~~<3

Sitting in the Lyft, he was mildly annoyed to have been instantly recognized by the driver. He had a large vase of flowers held tightly between his knees as the man chattered on about Loki. It was a topic he typically would enjoy but now, the only thing he wanted was to lean his head back and try to snag some sleep.

It amazed him at how people had latched onto the villain he had played. Tom himself was rather fond of the character and his countless Shakespearean callbacks.

But it worried him just the same, the driver taking him home knew his passenger was Loki.

Tom had the driver drop him off st the gate rather than going any further. The last thing he needed was the exact area in the sprawling complex that was theirs to be identified so soon.

Hopefully in a few weeks or so, interest would die down. There would be a lull in activity now that the press was done. It would be calm until convention time at least.

What did that calmness look like though? how much of that time would be spent here in the States? His mind swirled with the questions around the simple logistics. They had so man logistics that they needed to figure out and this was just one small part of it.

He had a few weeks to figure this out. A marriage crash course, if you will. Should they enlist a marriage counselor to help? Or was that not something they did?

He realized he was standing in front of the apartment door, vase in hand with a start. When had he gotten there? He had been walking through a sea of his own thoughts that he hardly remembered entering the gate. The flowers still looked good and though the vase was slightly damp from spillage, he had managed to keep the flowers upright while walking.

He was nervous to knock on the door. Should he knock or walk right in? He had the code and it was his name on the lease along with her. It was just as much his home as her’s, right? But what if she didn’t consider it that way?

Would she be happy he came earlier? It had sounded like she had been disappointed that his return had been delayed during their first phone call but could that have just been because he didn’t tell her? Was it silly to be worrying about this when they had spent the days sense talking fairly regularly?

Probably.

That didn’t stop him from standing outside the door to the apartment he had paid for as adrenalin flooded his system though. He had missed her, missed them both more than he had expected. The few days they had spent together, while high stress due to the logistics of the situation and trying to convince her to give it a chance, was a reprieve he had enjoyed.

“Oh come on, stop being a pansy.” Tom whispered under his breath, gathering his nerve and ringing the doorbell.

~~~~~<3

The sound of the doorbell pulled her away from the mixing bowl. Hopefully it wouldn’t wake Sally- it was getting later in the morning and she’d be waking up any time now but there was something oh so peaceful about the time before the chaos of a child waking.

Mia hadn’t been expecting anyone. There was nothing she was waiting to be delivered. There wasn’t any reason she could think of that someone would be at her door.

Looking through the peep hole, all she could see was flowers. Every true crime documentary and horror movie flashed through her mind with how the flowers prevented her from seeing anything else. The thoughts were quickly pushed aside though. It was a gaited community with a locked building entry door as well. The odds of someone coming to murder her was in the basement.

“Hello?” The door opened to revel a man standing holding a far too large vase of flowers. “Tom?” She guessed, more based on hope and how tall the figure holding the flowers was than anything else.

“Surprise?” He smiled at her sheepishly as he waited for her reaction. “These are for you.”

“You’re early.” Was the first thing to come out of her stunned mouth as he passed the flowers into her hands. Reaching into the apartment, she set them on the end table that had taken residence by the front door. The vase almost fell to the ground until she shoved it further back.

“Is that alright? I wanted to surp-” He was cut off as the air was knocked out of his chest.

Mia had launched herself at him, wrapping her arms around his torso and holding him firmly. The sudden affection surprised him. Until now, he had been the one initiating every touch carefully, trying to chip through the walls she had surrounded herself with.

“You came back.” Emotion made her voice thick and his chest muffled it even more.

“I told you I would.” Tom wrapped his arms around her waist and held her just as tightly as she held him. “I’m sorry I was delayed.”

“I’m sorry,” Mia came back to herself. How silly to just throw herself at him? It had felt good to be held in his arms though. Stepping back, she put some space between them.

With her hands resting on his chest, she could feel the rapid pounding of his heart. His arms were loosely around her waist until one disappeared. She didn’t notice at first, he had gotten lost in his eyes.

Those eyes she had seen in countless pictures and videos over the last few days. She had been too timid to notice how beautiful his eyes had been while he had been there. Somehow she had managed to sleep next to him, to talk with him about a future together and never notice the small beauty of his eyes.

A warm hand rested on her cheek, making her realize he was closer than he had been, the small distance she had created disappearing. She’d been so lost in his eyes she hadn’t noticed him stepping forward or pulling her back to him.

“I missed you.” His voice was almost lost in a sea of gravel. Then his lips hesitantly touched hers.

The kiss was soft and sweet. At first, she tensed up at the unexpected action but she melted into it after a moment. Running her hand up his chest and around his shoulder, her fingers found the short hairs at the nape of his neck. Then she was holding him as much as he was holding her.

~~~~~<3

The dress was hiked high around her thighs as he held her against the wall. She could feel his member straining against his pants as he held her in place largely with his pelvis.

Warm wet kisses and soft nips worked at her neck and shoulders as she pushed his jacket off his shoulders. First one arm, then the other left her and shed the jacket sleeves. It fell to the floor without a care.

His large hand gripped at her thigh as he yanked at the heels off her feet, throwing them blindly behind him. Then searing hot hands pushed their way up her thighs gripping her hips under the skirt.

~~~~~<3

Tag List: @winterisakiller @alexakeyloveloki @jennyggggrrr, @dangertoozmanykids101, @tilltheendwilliwrite, @tinchentitri, @wizardcherryblossom, @buttercupcookies-blog, @violethaze, @kats72, @soulpiercing, @evedia

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winterisakiller · 28 days

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Masterlist

I do try to keep this updated. Posting days are Friday’s though sometimes I go off schedule a bit. Tag lists are always open for current series or general tag for Loki, Tom or Everything.

Oh, and here is my AO3 if you prefer.

I don’t hold my writing hostage for comments, reblogs or believe in guilt tripping readers for interaction. I’m a work from home mother and author, currently working on my first proper books and selling my crafts. Feel free to support the insanity by buying me a ko-fi or reaching out to make sure I’ve eaten today (I have food, I just tend to forget to feed myself…)

Funding Kit!

Kofi

All donations will go to chicken treats and my and my daughter’s horseback riding lessons.

What happened to the student loan note? The class action lawsuit came through and it was discharged in total.

Series with open tag lists: ‘Of Dust and Ashes’ Book 2, coming late 2024, Sunflower

Completed series and one shots are below the read more cut

Tom Hiddleston

Sunflower: Book 1

Tom Hiddleston x ofc (Mia)

Overall Rating: Mature with explicit smut at later chapters.

Series warnings: Sexual content, drinking

Summary: Las Vegas drew in people like him. Heart broken, lonely and rejected while his ex married someone else. Here he could be anyone though, flying under the radar of his skyrocketing fame. Las Vegas was home to people like her. Lonely, broke and with the weight of the world on her shoulders. There was never enough of anything except stress. She was one of the countless faces that lived in the shadow of the glittering lights. Two worlds collide in a drunken night neither can remember. What do you do when what happens in Vegas is a legally binding marriage contract between two strangers?

Chapters: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33, Bonus: That Night

Clint Barton/ Hawkeye

Of Dust and Ashes - Book One

Eventual Clint Barton x Deanna (OFC)

Overall Rating: Mature with explicit smut at later chapters.

Author’s note: This series is heavy as a whole. I am not one who turns my nose up at putting warnings but I am very reluctant to call them ‘trigger warnings’. This series can at times be triggering. Please read with caution and at a pace that is comfortable for you.

Series warnings: Death, auto accidents, death of children, fire, violence, gun violence, references to sexual assault, miscarriage, references to domestic violence.

Summary: Like so many others, Deanna had expected Wednesday the 24th of July to pass just like any other day. She had spent the morning preparing her children for summer school and planning Aurora’s birthday party before her life shattered around her. While it was near impossible to wrap her head around it, all around the universe, beings and creatures alike were grappling with a loss they had not had time to begin to understand, yet the only option was to move forward or die. This is the story of the five years between the event that would become known as The Decimation and it’s undoing. This is a story of death, loss, gain and love. This is a story of survival in a world where the rules changed overnight. This is the untold story of the world after and the true cost of the Decimation that Marvel was too cowardly to explore. Follows the Events of Endgame however disregards the way Far From Home presents the state of the world.

Chapters: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33, 34, 35, 36, 37, 38, 39

Keep reading

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winterisakiller · 1 month

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Sunflower: Book 1, Chapter 14

Tom Hiddleston x OFC Series rated: M Chapter warnings: A bit high PG13 in our flashback and some anxiety. AN: Dude, I'm still fucking sick. Also, I edited and posted this while working because I'm sick and it's Friday and fuck these doctors, they don't get to dump dictation on me at the end of the week and be like "It's urgent." No, fuck you and the horse you rode in on, it's not Urgent if you didn't do it till now.

~~~~~<3

Mia slept like a rock but was up right on time. Of course, on time wasn’t late enough. She rarely got enough sleep when she worked nights but she would make up for that later, she always did.

Peeking in on Sally, she found the little one still asleep. It was seven in the morning, she would be waking soon. Generally, she wasn’t one to sleep in.

Mia took the chance to make breakfast in her new kitchen. The task wasn’t terribly difficult, even though she hadn’t even had a chance to unpack thanks to each box being labeled so clearly with the contents. Having a packing and moving crew was surely worth every penny Tom had paid for them.

~~~~~<3

Sally sat at their little dining table, too small for the space- something Mia never thought would be a problem in her life as pancakes were set in front of her. They had a busy morning ahead of them.

Ikea opened at ten and Mia had every intention of being there at opening. She intended to find a nice enough couch that was also affordable. Tom had probably intended for them to get a nicer couch than an Ikea special but he wasn’t here to stop her. She was unsupervised with his credit card.

The ping of her phone drew her attention. It was a text message form Ashley with a link. “Your man was on The Late Show.”

Sally was coping well with Tom’s absence so far. Mia didn’t want to risk ruining that when she had such a busy day ahead of them by reminding her that Tom had left so rather than just following the link, she spent time digging out her headphones from her purse.

“Momma,” Sally called, “Can I get something pretty for my new room?”

“Yeah, sure. We’ll see what we can find.” Mia was paying more attention to jabbing an earbud in her ear. “Finish eating while I get dressed, alright?”

~~~~~<3

Mia wasn’t one to watch late night TV. She was either sleeping or she was working. Plus the famous person or politician or whoever chatting with a host about movies wasn’t really her thing.

She set her phone down on her dresser as she traded out her pj pants for a pair of jeans. The screen loaded onto a man already talking to Tom. It must have been a clip from the show, not the whole segment. As she got dressed, she couldn’t help but be absorbed in the short video.

~~~~~<3

“You were just in Vegas, right?” The man said, leaning forward in his chair. His dark hair was cut short yet somehow still just a little wild. He had large eyes and the infectious smile of a late night comedian.

“I was, yes.” Tom smiled.

“It was an eventful few days I hear. You got up to some stuff.”

Tom chuckled. “Eventful yes, you could say that.”

“And you left with some bling.” Tom’s fingers twitched ever so slightly as the ring was pointed out. He wasn’t sure where this was going but he knew he needed to tread carefully. “There’s pictures!” The man said, “Bring on the pictures.”

The screen switched to Tom and Mia running down the hall, her white dress flowing and sparkly high heels glittering in the too bright lights of a hotel hallway. her face was obscured by Tom’s shoulder but his face was clearly visible.

His cheeks were bright red though if they didn’t know he was out of his mind wasted, they could believe it was from the private moment being intruded on.

The picture switched to them kissing in the bar some time earlier. Dim lights gave them a warm glow and they had drinks in front of them. Tom’s hand was on her neck and hers was resting on his thigh as she leaned forward. Her face was obscured by his as she leaned into the kiss.

“You’ve kept a romance under warps, Mr. Hiddleston.” The host teased. Color flushed Tom’s cheeks.

“I do like to keep my private life to myself.”

“And how long have you too been together?”

“That’s private.” Tom dodged. “But all anyone needs to know is I care for her deeply otherwise I wouldn’t have married her.”

“So it’s not a ‘what happens in Vegas stays in Vegas’ situation?” The host pressed.

“I’m as married today as I was Friday night.” Tom reiterated.

“Tell us about her!” The host propped his head up in his hands. If it was possible, he would have had hearts in his eyes. It was clear that the host and Tom had a report and were familiar with each other in a friendly way.

“She’s not a public figure.” Tom started, picking his words carefully. “Her privacy is important and I want to respect that. She’s not married to Actor Tom, she’s married to me and that’s a beautiful thing. Her name is Mia and-”

“Mia!” The host cried, popping up in his seat. “What a lovely name.”

“She’s lovely.” Tom agreed and on the other side of the country, in a different time and place Mia’s face got hot. “She’s absolutely wonderful and we’re looking forward to our future.”

The host continued to lightheartedly press for details but Tom stood firm. They showed a few more pictures from that night neither could remember but not a single image showed her face with the exception of the picture of them going into the restaurant over the weekend.

Had no one gotten a clear shot of her? That didn’t seem likely. Had Tom known ahead of time and asked for her face to be hidden? Was her makeup smeared and her face being hidden to protect their dignity?

~~~~~<3

“I’m done!” Sally yelled from the dining table, throwing Mia back into reality. Perhaps not reality, in a strange way what was happening on the screen was very much a part of her reality. No, her daughter’s voice had served throw her back into the present more than anything.

“Go get washed up.” Mia called, slipping a shirt over her head and quickly finishing getting herself dressed.

~~~~~<3

Ikea was overwhelming, as it always was. There were too many people, too much stuff and in general, far too much stimulation. But she would get through it and in the end she would be rewarded with Swedish meatballs. That was just how trips to Ikea went. You survived and then indulged in cafeteria food. She didn’t make the rules.

They sat on couch after couch as she picked which one would be best for the space. None of them really felt big enough but she was not going to go somewhere with more expensive sofas. That wasn’t an option. She would just have a lot of empty space in her living room. More room for Sally to play.

The one they picked was one of the largest. Under the cushions were storage compartments. It was a few hundred dollars and would likely break down after a few short years at best, needing to be replaced but she didn’t care.

While she hadn’t planned on it, she went ahead and got herself a pair of matching end tables and lamps to set on them. While the apartment had plenty of overhead lamps, there was a warmth that came from table lamps that she loved.

Sally picked out a soft rug to put on the floor. All in all, Mia didn’t feel too bad about the spending. It was less than a couch would have been if she went to Ashley’s Furniture or somewhere similar like Tom had probably intended.

The lamps were on clearance and that helped keep the cost low. The tables were the cheapest they had. Hopefully Tom wouldn’t mind.

~~~~~<3

Mia was anxious as she stood in line waiting. She had paid for their lunches with her own debit card but this was going to go on Tom’s card. She had no plan B for if it didn’t go through.

It was a international card, wasn’t it? Would it go through okay? What would she do if it didn't? What if they asked for her ID?

It was irrational, she knew that. Tom was traveling and had been spending money without issue on this card for as long as he was there from what she had seen. Places rarely asked for ID for credit card transactions anymore. There was so much fraud protection that it had just fallen to the wayside.

All the stress was for nothing. The card went through perfectly fine. No one asked her who she was to use it. No one questioned her. No one said “stop!”. It went perfectly, painlessly fine. As part of her knew it would.

The furniture would be delivered the next day. It was surreal to spend so much money at any one time. But it was done and she survived the flood of panic that came with spending his money. In the moment though, as she swiped his card, she thought she was going to revisit her Swedish meatballs.

Would it get easier over time? Mia decided she’s really rather not find out. If she had her way, she wasn’t going to be doing anymore major spending on his card, at all. It was better she didn’t get used to this. Tom wouldn’t always be there to financially save her. He wouldn’t always be there to replace her couch. This was temporary.

Sitting in the car before leaving IKEA, she shot a text to Tom letting him know she had spent his money as he had requested and how much the total was.

She hadn’t heard from him all day. In the morning she had assumed he was still sleeping after working the late night appearances but now it was quickly becoming afternoon without a word.

What did it mean? Why wasn’t he texting her?

It drove her insane the rest of the day. She checked her phone repeatedly for a hello or even so much as an acknowledgment of the purchases.

Nothing came however, leaving her to wrestle with the thousands of ‘what if’s that quickly took up residence in her mind. Time after time she started text messages only to delete them instead of sending.

It was fine if he didn’t text her, right? It was okay if they didn’t talk, right? They were just strangers, really, at the end of the day. This was fine.

~~~~~<3

The elevator walls were not mirrored but the polished stone may as well have been. Dark copies of the bride and groom surrounded them. They were alone and yet not, in this magical space.

Tom advanced on her slowly. She matched every step he took forward with one of her own backwards. There wasn’t enough air in the elevator car as it moved up and up.

Her heart was on cloud nine and the evaluator was taking the rest of her there.

She couldn’t breathe. It felt like she was gasping for air in all the best ways before her back hit the polished stone wall. There was no where else to go. She couldn’t take any more steps backward.

Her future didn’t stop just because her back hit the wall. Was this a sign of what her life would be like? Was this what her future with him would be like? Advancing faster than she could keep up?

Her future put his hands against the stone on either side if her head, palms flat and fingers splayed. His elbows buckled and then he was supporting his weight with his forearms, oh so much closer than he had been.

His face hovered just inches from hers. His breath smelled strongly of whiskey but the air around him smelled of his cologne. The mix of the two together was intoxicating.

Leaning forward, she closed the distance. The soft velvet of his lips felt amazing against hers. There was a light stubble to his face, hardly visible but as he pushed into her, she could feel it.

She wrapped her arms around his neck as his hands roamed around her waist and pulled her closer to him. Pinned between him and the wall, she didn’t have anywhere to go. There wasn’t anywhere she wanted to go.

His hands groped her ass through the layers and layers of fabric that made up the skirt of her dress. Pulling up and forward, he had her off her feet. Wrapping her legs around him, only possible due to the many folds of the skirts, she embraced her future closer, trying to wrap herself around the very concept.

His lips left hers and made their way down her neck, leaving a path of damp butterfly kisses down to her collar bone. Nipping and sucking at the soft flesh had her squirming in his arms.

The elevator wasn’t moving fast enough. There wasn’t a way she could get enough of him in here. At least, there was no legal way. There were cameras in the elevators and the halls. Again and again she told herself that.

His hand was large and warm. The warmth soaked into her breast. She arched into his touch. His touch was firm and strong. Muscles twitched and moved under her hands as she slipped them into his jacket after struggling with the buttons.

She hadn’t felt like this in years. It was more intoxicating than all the wine they had shared. She felt powerful. Desirable. Wanted.

Was this what love felt like? Was this what it felt like to be loved? It was the best feeling in the world.

~~~~~<3

Tag List: @winterisakiller @alexakeyloveloki, @jennyggggrrr, @dangertoozmanykids101 @tilltheendwilliwrite @tinchentitri @wizardcherryblossom @buttercupcookies-blog @violethaze @kats72 @soulpiercing

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This Blog Is Unrepentantly Pro- AO3!

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Sunflower: Book 1, Chapter 12

Tom Hiddleston x OFC Series rated: M Chapter warnings: None- a bit fillery AN: There is some whiplash when you side step into a new and hyper fixation that is so far *not this* that this felt weird lol.

Masterlist

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~`

Tom sat at the small dining table talking on the phone. Mia tried not to listen but it was hard not to. What she needed to be doing was sleeping in.

It was Tuesday morning and the strangest weekend of her life was well in the rear view mirror. She had to face reality and go to work tonight. Thankfully her shift was an early one, all things considered but still. It felt like returning to a world that she didn’t quite fit into again and she couldn’t put her finger on why.

“Everything alright?” Mia asked, sitting down at the cramped table with him.

“The lease is signed and you can pick up the keys as early as tomorrow.” Tom started with the good news first. “But I’ve got to fly out to New York today for an interview.”

This was it. Mia knew it was coming. There was no way their lives would allow them to be together and after the night before, it hurt. She hated that it hurt.

They should have kept things business. She shouldn’t have let him in, even a tiny bit. She shouldn’t have opened her heart to the possibility of him. Dumb. God she was so dumb.

“I need to be there for two days.”

“Work snuck up on you?” Mia tried not to sound sad.

“In a way.” Tom took her hand in his, the casual affection burning her heart like a knife. “I’ve been dodging Luke for most of the weekend and it slipped my mind. I can come back here after for a but. I’ll need to make a stop home though in a few weeks.”

“You don’t have to stay here so much.” Mia cringed at her words.

“I want to, darling.” The endearment pulled her eyes to him. Had they gotten to that point? “You’re my wife and it’s only right that when we can be, we’re together. I’ll leave you with some funds for a new couch, groceries and what have you. Whatever you think you’ll need.”

“I can take care of the utilities.” Mia insisted. “I can transfer services from here, it shouldn’t be a problem.”

“I’ll let Luke know.”

~~~~~<3

Mia’s phone pinged, drawing her nose out of her book. It was Ashley texting her a link to a news article. So far, she had been so good about avoiding looking at the tabloid stories for the weekend.

This one though, she couldn’t not see if she was going to dismiss that annoying ‘unread message’ notification. The article preloaded a headline and the picture without her having to click on it. Technology was ever so helpful.

Looking back at her was a picture of her walking, her arm in Tom’s toward the restaurant from the night before. It had worked, someone had taken the picture. There was a zoomed in shot of her left hand, the unique ring set she loved from the moment she woke up married.

“Don’t click it.” Tom’s voice was soft. “That’s not a path you want to go down, trust me.”

“Okay.” She locked her phone. “If you say so.”

“It exists, it means Luke was right and did his job. That’s all that matters.”

~~~~~<3

Sally hugged Tom tightly at the apartment door. Tears glittered in her little blue eyes as her arms strained to hold onto him as hard as she could. She was wrapped in Tom’s arms as he knelt on the ground between his two suitcases and held her to him.

This little person was a part of his life now and in a few short days, he cared for her greatly. It terrified him how quickly that bond developed, more than anything else had. She was a little person who was caught up in this whole marriage business and the chaos of his life. She was a child with no say.

“Are you going to come back and tell me more stories?” Her little voice was muffled by his shoulder.

“Of course.”

“Do you promise?” Sally asked.

“I do.”

Mia’s back stiffened. She was protective over her daughter, as was to be expected of a single mother. There had been countless promises made to Sally over the years that hadn’t been kept. Sometimes, it was Mia herself who didn’t keep the promises but a broken promise that could be avoided was different than someone promising something they couldn’t deliver.

Never promise anything you’re not sure you can keep was a concept she lived by. It was the only thing she could do to try and counter the look on Sally’s face when the promised phone call never came or the Christmas present that was ‘in the mail’ never was delivered.

When Sally got older she will start to question why the gifts were mailed and the time together was by phone when her father only lived on the other side of the city. But for now at least, she was young and thought the best of everyone.

“They’ve got to get going, Sally.” The neighbor girl elected babysitter for the night sat on the couch as she waited. “Come on, let’s watch the Nightmare Before Christmas.”

The movie was Sally’s latest obsession. She loved that she shared a name with a main character.

“I’ll be back in about an hour, give or take.”

~~~~~<3

It felt strange to watch Tom load is bags into the back of the car. She didn’t like it and that was something she didn’t like even more.

They drove to McCarran International Airport with tension thick in the air. It didn’t feel good that he was leaving like she thought it would.

She wanted him to stay longer. She wanted to get to know him more.

Tom shifted, pulling his wallet from his back pocket. Mia watched but didn’t say anything. It felt like there were so many words inside her that she wanted to say but she couldn’t identify a single one.

Tom held a card out to her. “Here,” The card hung in the air, suspended by his fingers. She glanced at it then back to the road.

“You don’t-”

“Think of it as a promise that I’m going to come back.” Tom set the card in the cup holder rather than wait for her to take it.

“That is so cheesy.” Mia couldn’t help but laugh. It was short and died under the tension in the car.

“The movers will be paid ahead. Use that card for a couch and coffee pot- whatever else you feel you need.”

“I can’t just use your card. I don’ want to leave you in a pinch or something.”

“It’s a credit card. It’s got enough on it and won’t leave me stranded if you go overboard. Not that I think you will. Please, use it. Get a couch and coffee maker. Whatever else you need too. And if something comes up and you need it for something else, use it. If you’re unsure, text me. Call me.”

Mia sighed. She wanted to protest and wanted to send him away with his card but she couldn’t. There were things she needed to replace if she was going to not take the bugs with her.

“Fine.”

~~~~~<3

“What airline do you want me to pull up to?” The airport was almost always busier than it had any right to be regardless of the time of day. This time was no exception.

“Can you park?” Tom asked.

“What?” Mia hadn’t expected to park. They’d already gone by the short term parking. “We’d have to swing around again…”

“Delta it is then.”

The car stopped on the side of the road designated to load and unload passengers for Delta airlines. Fiddling with the hem or her shirt, she didn’t know what to do as she stood on the sidewalk.

Tom retrieved his bags from the back of the car without trouble. She had wanted to help but she didn’t want to be in the way. It was easy to be in the way at the airport.

The, in what felt like a blink of an eye, they were standing on the sidewalk together. What an awkward pair they made.

“You should probably get going, huh?” She didn’t know what else to say. What she really wanted to say was: ‘don’t go’. She couldn’t say that though.

“I’ll be back in a few days.” Tom said and they stood in silence again.

People moved around them. The night sky was a deep dark blue though the ground all around them was lit up bright as day. There was no shortage of lights around the airport.

“Come here.” Tom reached out and grabbed her by the wrist.

She was caught off guard by the action. He pulled her to him and she went easy enough. In a blink of the eye, she was in his arms and the world slowed down and tears she didn’t expect burned at her eyes.

It felt safe in his arms. The heat of his body radiated off of him. There was more than enough heat in the air already but the heat of his body was something different. She could feel the pounding of his heart in his chest. The scent of his body wash clung to him.

Had he held her since the morning after they changed their lives forever? She didn’t think so. There had been small moments of careful affection but this was not that. Was it a show for anyone observing them? For some unseen cameras he forgot to warn her about? Was it real or was it an act?

“What are you doing?” Mia carefully wrapped her arms around him.

“I’m holding you.” Tom said as if he didn’t know what the actual question was.

“Why?” Mia mumbled, her cheek resting on his chest. “Is someone taking pictures?”

“Not that I know of.” She could feel him sigh.

“Then why?”

He was quite for a few moments. The world moved around them and she couldn’t help but to relax into the embrace. The airport faded away as her eyes slipped closed.

“Because I wanted to.” Tom finally answered. “Because I think I’m going to miss you.”

Nothing seemed like the right response to his confession. In the absence of words, she simply pulled herself tighter against him for a moment. Would it convey what she wanted to say but was too scared?

And then, the embrace was over, and he was walking away with a parting wave.

Watching him disappear into the airport, bags rolling behind him left her feeling alone. He thought he was going to miss her. She was scared to say it but, she thought just maybe she would miss him too. It was something she should have said. She wished she had said it.

She stood watching as he made his way toward the ticket machines. He stopped and looked out the large windows. Her breath caught in her chest as a look of surprise crossed his face for a moment before it lit up in one of his smiles. His smiles were beautiful.

Raising his hand, he waved at her a final goodbye.

~~~~~<3~~~~~<3

Mia’s hands were held in his. Her heart felt like it was trying to beat out of her chest. The words said to here were hard to follow but she loved the way they sounded in his voice.

He had a magical voice. This was magic. He was magic.

“Do you take this woman to be your wife?” The officiant said. The rest of the things after were lost to her but that lingered in her mind.

“I do.” Tom said as clearly and confidently as if he had been sober.

It took a few tries to thread the matching wedding bad onto her finger though once it did, it nestled against the engagement ring perfectly. She hoped that they would nestle their lives together into one just as perfectly.

“And do you take this man to be your husband?” Again the other words were lost. Was he able to keep track of the things being said to them?

“I do.” She hoped she sounded as clear and confident as he did. The simple gold band slipped onto his finger as if it was made to be there. It felt like his hand had been waiting forever for her to put that simple ring where it had always belonged.

“You may kiss the bride.” The officiant said.

Tom reached out, caressing her cheek with his hand before pulling her into him. She could feel the metal ring on his finger and loved it. Then his lips were on her’s.

Soft and strong. She could smell the whiskey on his breath and as she gasped a breath, she could then taste it on his tongue. Her arms were around his neck as she arched into his embrace.

There was no where else in the world she was meant to be in that moment.

~~~~~<3

Tag List: @winterisakiller @alexakeyloveloki, @jennyggggrrr, @dangertoozmanykids101 @tilltheendwilliwrite @tinchentitri @wizardcherryblossom @buttercupcookies-blog @violethaze @kats72 @soulpiercing

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this is so compelling and heartbreaking and important and i wanted to share it. this is the reality of getting an abortion even with roe v wade in place and it's about to get worse.

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Sunflower: Book 1, Chapter 11

Tom Hiddleston x OFC Series rated: M Chapter warnings: Just the typical being drunk off her ass at the end of the chapter. AN: Good Lord, this was a bit of a beast to edit. I added almost 700 words during edit. Chapter 10, Masterlist, Chapter 12

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~<3

After much thought and discussion, it was decided that Sally would spend the evening with Ashley. They would get take out and have a girl’s night. When asked, Ashley didn’t mind the short notice, though she typically would have. It had been bothering her that there hadn’t have been much updates from the newlyweds. If babysitting with no notice got her that update, she would take it.

Tom sat downstairs with Ashley and Sally. He took her grilling well, all things considered. She grilled Sally too, much softer though. It was her chance to evaluate how good of a man he had been to them since walking into their lives. Mia may lie to Ashley. Tom couldn’t be trusted, yet. Sally however would never dare lie to her aunt.

“I don’t like that you’re making them move.” Ashley whispered while Sally ran to go get a different coloring book. “But I am thankful for what it’ll mean for her.” Ashley nodded to Sally.

“I am not forcing anything” Ashley’s eyebrow cocked and he knew she was a bit more aware than he thought. “I’m strongly suggesting it. I swear, I mean no harm. There isn’t a reason she should have to stay here.” Tom’s eyes followed Sally as she came back with another book.

This was their truce. Ashley cared for that little girl more than she did her own sister. If Tom would benefit her, Ashley had a hard time rejecting him. But would he always benefit them?

~~~~~<3

Mia considered and set aside dress after dress upstairs. Nothing seemed fancy enough. Nothing seemed flashy enough. Nothing seemed to make her look good enough. Nothing seemed right.

Nothing seemed right to be seen with him.

The simple fact was that she wasn’t good enough for him.

He had warned her, they were going somewhere nice enough that people wouldn’t talk themselves out of thinking he was who they thought he was. Chances are there would be a picture of them at some point.

They had no control over the pictures taken Friday night but they had control over how they looked tonight. Luke had made it very clear to Tom that this was his chance to take control of the narrative, albeit by a thread.

“What pictures were taken Friday night?” she had asked and he tried to play it off, swirling the coffee in his mug.

“I haven’t looked yet, if I’m honest. Luke assures me nothing too scandals though there was no doubt that we were a couple.” He explained that he made a point not to look at what gossip rags posted about him. It was strongly suggested that she do the same.

So far, she hadn’t looked.

“Everything alright?” Tom had knocked on the side of the wall next to the weird open concept vanity and dressing closet thing that reminded him more of a hotel dressing room than closet.

“I can’t pick.” Mia grumbled. She felt like crying. She hadn’t felt this discouraged about her appearance in a very long time. Now she was aware of every spot that was a little too round.

“Do you want help picking?” Tom offered, carefully.

“Have at it.”

She was over it. It made her want to cancel the plans and go to a simple fast casual steakhouse. It made her want to run away. It made her wonder if any of this was worth it.

“What about this one?” Tom picked out a black dress she hadn’t considered.

The fabric was stretchy and clingy. The neckline was lower and the slit was high. It was older but i a fairly timeless cut. Tom didn’t know it but the dress hanging from the hanger in his hand was older than Sally. It hadn’t seen much wear though.

“I don’t know if that one even fits anymore.” Mia felt defeated. “I haven’t worn it since before Sally.”

“Try it on and let’s see?”

~~~~~<3

Mia doubted the dress. It fit, sure but it didn’t fit like it used to. The fabric hugged her in a way hadn’t remembered it doing before. Her breasts filled the bust in a way they hadn’t before becoming a mother. She fared if she moved wrong her bra wouldn’t be able to conceal the empty way her breasts felt. It made her feel exposed.

“Can I see?” Tom was laying on the bed as he waited, eyes on the ceiling and ankles crossed. His hands rested on his chest, fingers interlaced. On his stomach, his phone rose and fell slightly with each relaxed breath he took.

He didn’t want to leave the room. He wanted to be there to offer support but he also wanted to give her privacy. It wasn’t his intention to put more pressure on her but he feared his warnings earlier had that impact that he couldn’t take back.

“I don’t know about this.” She walked out, holding a simple pair of black heels in her hand.

“It looks wonderful. You look wonderful.” Tom wasn’t sure she’d believe him but he ment every word. Without knowing what her insecurities were, it was hard for anyone to defend against them.

With his assurances, Mia let the dress slide. With a wrap, she could hide some if needed. There wasn’t much she could do to her hair to make it classy. In her opinion, her hair was pretty boring but she did what she could.

A simple clip made of cheap metal but accented with glittering glass gems of various colors. They were standard offerings in the local malls, sold by kiosks by people who couldn’t speak English well enough to ever answer what their wares were made of.

Makeup felt just as overwhelming but for better or worse, she had a lot less to work with. It was either a simple natural look that was light on the makeup or what she wore for work. Neither felt like the right choice but she went with the same natural look that was her day to day normal.

It would have to do. It would have to be good enough.

She wasn’t good enough.

~~~~~<3

Tom had a car come for them. He didn’t want her to have to drive them to their first proper date but he also didn’t want to drive them. Driving in large American cities was a special kind of stressful that he wasn’t fond of. He could do it, he carried his International Driver’s Permit whenever he traveled but it wasn’t always his idea of a good time.

~~~~~<3

The front door closed behind them as the car turned into the complex. Mia took a deep breath as she realized her knees were shaking ever so slightly. She wasn’t ready for this but she was, in a way, excited for it.

Tom had told her how going out in public was for him. He was always an actor, always performing to a degree. Who he really was was reserved for friends and family alone. That was the Tom she had been getting to spend time with so far.

She, Sally and Ashley got to see the man under the armor but the world got a polished version. Today she would get to meet the polished Tom.

It was up to her how much of that mentality she wanted to adopt when out with him or, heaven forbid, if someone were to approach her without him. Tom gave her permission to be fake and to protect her privacy should she so wish.

The story Luke had crafted for them, basic and mostly full of avoiding details. They were married, they knew each other for some unspecified time and they liked to keep their personal affairs personal.

No other questions were to be answered. Nothing to see here. Whatever you do, don’t look behind door number one.

~~~~~<3

Tom offered her his hand as the car pulled into her- their- parking lot. She took it and they both marveled in that. There was only a slight hesitation as she told herself he was just a man.

He wasn’t an actor. He wasn’t her husband. He wasn’t rich. He wasn’t handsome. He was just a man.

Her heart was pounding in her chest as she descended the stairs, Tom just a step ahead of her and steadying her in her heels. The street lights reflected off the curls in his hair and his high cheekbones as he glanced up at her.

Butterflies swarmed in her stomach. Okay, maybe she couldn’t convince herself that he wasn’t handsome but he was still just a man.

Was this what she felt, Friday night? Was this just a taste of the magic that made her decide it was a good idea to get married? Was this what it felt like to fall-

Stop that. Don’t fall into the fairy tail. She had to stay in reality. This wasn’t a story, a hallmark movie. This was real life. This wasn’t going to work out for them. There wasn’t a reality where they would seamlessly fall in love and live happily ever after.

Tom opened the rear door for her and murmured a few soft words to the driver as she slipped in. This was his element. The car was in motion as soon as the door was closed.

“How are you feeling?” Tom kept his voice low, pulling the back of her hand to his lips to place a chaste kiss.

Was this affection true? Was it a part of the act that was public Tom? How could she know?

~~~~~<3

Mia followed Tom’s lead to the table. Everything was a blur. Tom had warned her in the car that this dinner was partially to make a statement. Luke had arranged for there to be someone to take their pictures.

Luke had advised him that if he intended to make the impulsive relationship work, they needed to be seen. There was only so much a statement from Luke on Tom’s behalf could do when the only proof that the relationship existed was pictures from one night.

She didn’t know what to expect when the car pulled to a stop. The last thing she wanted to do was get out of the car, knowing there would be pictures. It felt like she was selling her soul.

“You’ve got this. I’ll be right by your side.” He kept his voice soft, relaxed.

“I’ve never done this before. This isn’t something people like me do.”

“It is now.”

Tom gave her leg a squeeze just above her knee. “It’s showtime.”

~~~~~<3

Tom opened the door and stepped out. First he stood tall and straightened his suit jacket before leaning down and into the car. Holding his hand out to her, he waited.

“This is dumb.” Mia whispered, trying to elegantly scoot toward the opened door and Tom laughed. Hopefully he was laughing at her final complaint and not some awkward way she scooted.

It would have been easy to take her words to heart- she’d called him, his ideas and way of doing things dumb plenty of times in the last few days but instead, he was starting to find it enduring. If his agent’s predictions were correct about his career’s trajectory- he would need a grounding force to keep his feet planted on the ground.

She could be that force for him, he knew it. The universe gave him exactly what and who he needed right when he needed her. There had to be a reason.

~~~~~<3

She wasn’t sure how she ended up sitting across from Tom at a small candle lit table overlooking the sea of twinkling lights of Las Vegas. Walking into the building was a blur. There were people around but she couldn’t pinpoint who was sent to take pictures.

Tom assured her that she wouldn’t know who it was. They were professionals. “Trust the process”, he said. Most importantly, she needed to enjoy herself and act natural.

It was beautiful and there were people there who’s names she knew. They were not people she personally knew, it was names on billboards, in movies and on stages. She tried not to stare at anyone. It didn’t take a degree to know that people didn’t like to be gawked at.

Yet wasn’t that what this dinner was for? So that they could be gawked at?

Thoughts swirled in her head. She didn’t fit in here. She didn’t belong here. She looked out of place.

“You’re in your head.” His voice pulled her out. “Relax.”

They had their salads in front of each of them, Steaks would be coming out soon. Mia had heard how good the steaks here were but never in her life did she think she would get to try one. Really though, it was Vegas- all the high class places were said to have steaks to die for.

Did the fancy places all taste the same at the end of the day? It wasn’t something Mia ever thought she would have to think about. Yet here she was, possibly walking into a life where she could find out.

Though it took her longer than she wanted to relax, eventually she did. The wine helped- though it was sipped slowly and only giving a slight warmth to her mind. There was a temptation to down the glass but she was terrified to have anything more than the slightest buzz.

Once she was relaxed, conversation began to flow. It was easy, in a way. There was no pressure to sufficate them like a normal first date. They had a future already and were only going back and reinforcing the foundation.

A life with him was a foregin and strange idea but the way he smiled, the way his laugh sounded- it was a life that maybe she could enjoy. There were little things she noticed about him during the night that took up root in her mind.

The way his eyebrows always seemed to be on the move but only just. One tended to find itself raised just slightly higher than the other when he spoke about something he was passionate about or he was curious. He was tactile, always reaching out to touch in some way.

He was a man she could fall in love with, she realized, and that thought terrified her more than anything else.

~~~~~<3~~~~~<3

The staff bridesmaids tied up the lace closure in the back of her dress carefully. Her hair was done by the on site stylist and her makeup too. Everyone was an employee, dedicated to playing the roles usually occupied by friends and family.

This was happening. She was doing this.

Large redwood doors opened in the resort chapel. A long aisle and row after row of empty wooden chairs greeted her but she didn’t notice the cold emptiness. Music played softly. A few staff bridesmaids walked out before her and then it was her turn.

She hoped she didn’t trip. It was hard to walk with the world tipping and spinning. She hoped she didn’t vomit. Was the nausea due to nerves or was the glass of bubbly she had just downed going to be the one that finally undid her?

Keeping her eyes on him, she used his smiling face to ground her, to pull her forward.

She was pulled toward him, had been since the moment he sat next to her. Or was it she that sat next to him? Everything he had done pulled her to him. His arms around her as they danced. The warmth in his eyes. The way his laugh sounded like music. She was drawn to him like a moth to flame.

She counted on that pull now and wasn’t disappointed.

Fuck, he was handsome.

She was the luckiest girl in the world.

He saw her, not for the working single mother facing down poverty that she was but for the beautiful woman just blooming into herself.

They’d only known each other for a few hours but she knew she loved him and would love him for all eternity.

~~~~~<3

Tag List: @winterisakiller @alexakeyloveloki, @jennyggggrrr, @dangertoozmanykids101 @tilltheendwilliwrite @tinchentitri @wizardcherryblossom @buttercupcookies-blog @violethaze @kats72 @soulpiercing

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winterisakiller · 2 months

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Sunflower: Book 1, Chapter 10

Tom Hiddleston x OFC Series rated: M Chapter warnings: Tom sticks his foot in his mouth some? AN: The baby chicks are a week and a half old! All 5! I know no one cares but that's why this is a few hours late lol Chapter 9, Masterlist, Chapter 11

~~~~~~~<3

Mia hated looking at apartments. It was disgusting how quickly Tom had gotten apartment tours lined up. She didn’t even remember him making the calls but his phone went off in text after text through the early morning. A never ending ping of appointment notifications.

“How did you get so many set up so fast?” Mia was tired and they’d only looked at the fist one.

She was envious of Sally, hanging out with her neighbor and probably preparing to go swimming right about now. Getting in the pool before the heat of the day had a chance to really sink it’s claws in for the day and soaking the day away sounded far better than driving from one end of the Vegas metro to the other, looking at apartments she could never afford.

“Luke.” Tom admitted.

It wasn’t taking long at all for Mia to learn that Luke was far more than just his publicist. They had worked together for long enough that a true friendship had formed between the two men. There was little doubt that if Tom ended his career tomorrow Luke would continue to be his friend.

“He’s not mad at you?”

The highway traffic was pretty light, everyone was either asleep still or already at work. It made driving a relaxing distraction. With her mind occupied and her eyes on the road, it made it easier to talk to him.

“Oh, he’s mad.” Tom laughed and Mia couldn’t help the fact that she liked the sound of it. “The man’s made it his mission to be my personal nanny- heaven knows I need one sometimes.”

“To keep you from running off to Vegas and marrying the first girl you see?” She forced a smile, refusing to let her sour mood taint his day.

“For the record, you were not the first girl I saw- I do remember that much.” It was Mia’s turn to laugh, thankful that he hadn’t taken offense.

The laugh was true, despite her mood. It felt good to laugh with him. Somehow, though she hated what they were going to do she was enjoying the drive. She was enjoying the simple time with him.

Tom continued, “but yes, he tends to keep me on a much needed leash. Without him I’d miss interviews, be late for auditions. I probably wouldn’t be in the right country half the time.”

“You can’t be that bad.” She pulled up to a gate as they neared an apartment complex.

It was much more modest than the first one but the area looked nice enough. There was a gate that worked. Every apartment in her price range either had a broken gate or one that rolled open automatically when a generic sensor was triggered.

Reaching out, she pressed the buzzer and waited. “What do I tell them?”

“Give my surname.” Tom whispered back. “Our surname.”

Mia rolled her eyes. Technically she still had steps to do if she was going to take his name. They hadn’t talked about it yet but she wasn’t sure if she would change her name. That was a lot of work for a temporary marriage.

What if it wasn’t temporary?

~~~~~<3

“What do you think?” Tom Asked.

The manager of the complex stood by the front door, having completed the tour, giving them space to discuss .

The grounds had everything she could ask for. It had everything she would want and then some, including a small convince store type set up in the office lobby that reminded her a lot like what could be found in the hotel lobbies.

There were three pools, a playground far nicer than the one at her current complex and the school was close. Mia could see the complex playground, complete with children playing on it from the balcony.

The manager assured them that the noise wouldn’t be a problem because each unit was fairly sound insulated. Mia wasn’t worried about the sound though, being a parent herself. Kid noise was reassuring in a way. It ment there would be kids for Sally to play with.

The kitchen was large enough to cook in. Three of her kitchens could fit in it. Hell, three of her current apartments could fit in this one. That really wasn’t saying a lot, her apartment was small and cramped. There was hardly room to cook or move in the apartment. The only reason it didn’t feel claustrophobic was the lack of furniture in general.

Okay, that was an exaggeration but it felt like it. The space was far better set up, making it feel even larger simply due to efficency. There were closets throughout, ensuring there would be places to store things out of sight. There even was a closet on the balcony to store patio furniture should she need for a storm or maybe she could put a chest freezer out there.

There were possibilities in this apartment.

The bedrooms were large, not just the master. Sally would have room to play in her room and in the living room. There were two bathrooms, one in the hall between the bedrooms and a private ensuite. Mia would be able to have a bathroom not littered with toys and seemingly perpetually spilled water.

“How much is it?” There was no way in hell the apartment was under 2k a month but she hoped it was under three. It was so hard to feel good about it but this apartment was nice.

She could see Sally playing here. She could see Sally starting school here. But she could also see the year ending and Sally having to move away from here too. Maybe, if she saved everything she could, she could buy Sally a second year here. Unless there was a drastic improvement in her career, if things didn’t work out with Tom there was no way Sally would spend her childhood living in apartments like this one.

“Mia, I can afford to do a year here- how much it is dosen’t matter.”

“Is there a problem Mrs. Hiddleston?” Tom waved off the leasing manager’s question.

“She’s just feeling a little anxious, please give us a moment longer?”

“Of course- you certainly don’t have to make a decision now however, if I may say, these units tend to fill fast. I can hold it as a curtesy for a few days without commitment but not any longer than that. I do think you and your wife would be a lovely addition to the community. And with our onsite-”

“If we could have just a few moments longer?” Tom suspected she knew who he was.

If she was a fan, he appreciated her attempt to play it cool and respect his private life. If she didn’t know him though, she was just a pushing leasing manager and that was even worse. Either way, she was starting to step on a nerve. The intrusion into his life, his conversations, was quickly becoming something he was growing tired of.

“Yes, of course.” She made her way back to the entry door where she once again took up her post, much to Tom’s relief.

“Let’s walk around again?” Tom took Mia’s hand in his and when she didn’t pull away, he led her back into the heart of the unit.

He walked her through the open living space and into the Master bedroom. They looked again at closets, drawers and showers. With her hand in his, they admired the lighting, all on dimmer switches and the amount of storage space.

~~~~~<3

“Are you tired of driving?” They had looked at three more apartments, only stopping for a fast food lunch. She had driven them from end to end of the greater Las Vegas area.

“I don’t mind it.” She did, a little but it wasn’t like she’d be doing this much driving every day. She needed the distraction to occupy herself anyway.

“I’ve got reservations for us for dinner- It’s for the three of us but I can cancel it if you’d rather. Or?”

“Arn’t you worried about more people seeing us?”

Tom shrugged. “I”m not going to hide you or Sally, our marriage. I’m not ashamed.”

“And yet you are hell bent on moving us into a fancier apartment.” The words were out before she could check herself.

“I’m not doing that because I’m ashamed-” She cut him off.

“Are you sure? Not a single part of you is ashamed to be seen in the cheap part of town? Worried that someone will snap a picture of you walking up those steps? That they’ll make up some story that you’re secretly visiting hookers or using drugs or who knows what low lives can’t afford a nice apartment.”

The words cut her as she spat them out. Each bitter slice was fueled by exhaustion and heat but more than anything, it was fueled by insecurity.

Tom sat back, waiting for her to finish. She was on the attack again, not for the first time that day but this time, there wasn’t any denying it.

The whole situation made her scared. He was asking a lot, he knew that. It was expected that she would struggle. Hell, he was asking her to stay married to a man she didn’t know and to trust her future in him. Again, he reminded himself how important it was to give her grace.

But everything happened for a reason, right?

“Do you want to know why I am so hell bent on getting you to move?” Tom tried, and failed, to mind his tone. “It’s because you had no food thanks to the maintenance crew eating it. It’s because I watched a goddamn cockroach crawl out of the refrigerator. From what I have seen, that’s not on you. You’ve got what food you had on bloody lockdown. Bags in containers and bins.”

“That’s reality!” She spat back, fingers gripping the wheel tightly.

“It’s your reality.” Tom snapped back. “But it dosen’t have to be. All I’m asking for is you to trust me, just a fucking little bit like you did Friday night. I know you’re scared.”

Mia didn’t answer. There wasn’t a lot she could say. They drove in silence nearly the whole way back to her apartment.

Tom watched her as she drove, giving her space in her silence. There was so much he wanted to say but if he said too much, he feared he would just push her away. He feared he had already said too much anyway.

He wasn’t dumb, he knew people lived in poverty. It wasn’t some secret that poverty was a problem both in his home nation and in America. He knew it wasn’t a issue limited to developing countries but it was something else to see it in person, to live it in a way, even for such a short time.

It was easy to forget just how privileged his upbringing was.

Mia cut the engine after parking in her assigned spot in front of the complex. Tom reached for the door but hesitated as she just sat there. His hand fell away from the door and he waited for some sort of direction.

In the driver’s seat, Mia sat taking deep breaths. Her eyes were fixed on the steering wheel as seconds ticked on. Tears glittered in her eyes, reflecting the exterior lights of the building.

“I liked the second one.” She whispered. It felt like she was admitting defeat and it took everything in her to fight back the tears. But it felt good to say it too. “How much is that one?”

“You don’t need to know.” Tom answered. “But I will tell you it’s not the most expensive of the ones we looked at. They’re going to give us a discount for paying for the year upfront too.”

“It’s closer to wor,k too.” Mia tried to focus on the positive as she willed her eyes to dry out.

He nodded. “I thought that may be a positive.”

She had told him the night before that she had no intention of quitting her job. It had been important to her that he understood that. No part of her wanted to take advantage of him or his money. Accepting help from him was hard for her and she had full intention of carrying her weight as best she could.

He appreciated that more than he cared to admit. The universe gave him a wife and he was prepared to accept whatever came, within reason. There were people in the world who would have jumped at the opportunity to marry him for their own selfish reasons.

“I’ll have Luke make the arrangements.” Tom took a deep breath before stepping out into what he feared was a field of landmines. “I’ll have him arrange movers too, when we know when.”

Her lease wasn’t up for another four months but he had insisted that the move take place sooner. There would be fees for breaking her lease but that didn’t matter to Tom. He was prepared to pay whatever, within reason, to have his wife and step daughter living somewhere safe and clean

Wife and step daughter- what a thought that was? There were things he thought he may find in Las Vegas during this trip but that wasn’t on the list. How he hoped it wouldn’t be something he regretted.

“What do we need to replace to ensure you don’t bring any bugs into the new apartment?” Though he was acting as if it wasn’t a concern, he wasn’t made of money either.

Mia opened the car door and took a deep breath. They were doing this and she needed to stop fighting it. Stop fighting him but it was so damn hard.

“There are probably bugs living in the couch, the TV and the kitchen appliances- not your kettle but I try not to think about what can’t be cleaned in the coffee machine or air fryer.”

“Okay,” Tom kept a mental tally. The couch didn’t surprise him- it was clearly old and not terribly comfortable anyway. “What about the beds?”

“They’re older but they should be fine. There’s no rips or tears in them.”

~~~~~<3~~~~~<3

Tom’s hands shook as he buttoned his shirt. This was happening. He was doing this. They were doing this. The suit was his own, one from his small supply of luggage but that had felt right somehow. It was a left over from the press event he had been leaving, not worn but packed just in case. It always was good to have options.

Just in case.

It was as if he knew.

As if the universe had planned for this moment just for him.

As if it was destiny.

Tom grabbed his glass from the dressing table in front of him and drained it of of whiskey. His head swam and he knew he would be sick in the morning. It was worth it though. He was having the time of his life.

The glass bottle clacked against the rim of the cup as he refilled his glass and poured another. He’d had too much but he needed more. He needed to steady his hands and his heart and his mind.

His future was waiting for him.

~~~~~<3

Tag List: @winterisakiller, @alexakeyloveloki, @jennyggggrrr, @dangertoozmanykids101, @tilltheendwilliwrite @tinchentitri @wizardcherryblossom @buttercupcookies-blog @violethaze @kats72 @soulpiercing

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winterisakiller · 3 months

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Sunflower: Book 1, Chapter 8

Tom Hiddleston x OFC Series rated: M Chapter warnings: Tom sticks his foot in his mouth some? AN: Head's up, next Friday we're getting baby chicks in. In theory it shouldn't cause any delay but anything can happen with baby birds less than 48 hours old. Chapter 7, Masterlist, Chapter 9

~~~~~~~~~

Mia was comfortable as she slept. She was warm. She felt safe. She didn’t want to get up. Luckily, she didn’t have to. It was Sunday morning and Sundays were for sleeping in.

Tom’s hand ran down her back, fingers catching where the fabric bunched. She woke slowly, opening her eyes as Tom took a deep breath and let it out slowly, sighing in his sleep.

Before going to bed the night before, Mia had set up a fortress of pillows and blankets to isolate each other. Now that had been dismantled. scattered across the floor and she slept in his arms, head resting in the crook of his shoulder and nuzzled into his chest.

It was nice, waking up in someone’s arms. It had been a long time since she had woken up in someone’s arms. It was early still, but not too early to get up. It was that most frustrating type of early- too late to go back to sleep but too early to comfortably get up.

Would it be selfish to stay in bed, in his arms like this now that she was awake? He didn’t belong to her, not really. It was just a piece of paper. There was no real relationship. There was no marriage. She didn’t belong in his arms.

Mia finally extracted herself from the bed after spending the last hour dozing in comfortable warmth, debating the ethics of soaking up his warmth. Though she had tried not to, she had woken Tom up as she climbed out of his arms.

“Good Morning.” His voice was thick with sleep.

“Morning.” She was thankful he didn’t say anything about their sleeping position.

Mia didn’t register the tinkling of the bells in the hall. Sally often was an early riser, content to play with her toys in her room and let mom sleep a little later and Tom was right in front of her.

“Is he your boyfriend?” Sally’s voice from the bedroom doorway caught them both off guard. She had a small stuffed dog in her hands and a blanket draped around her shoulders.

Mia had to give her something more than just friends as an explanation. If Sally went and told the neighborhood kids that her mom was sleeping with shirtless friends in her bed it wouldn’t look great. She had to at least better define friend for the sake of her reputation.

“Yeah, baby- Tom’s a special friend. He’s my boyfriend.” It was closer to the truth and Mia had no choice but to hope Tom would accept the compromise and play along.

“And momma is your girlfriend?” Sally asked.

“Yeah, little flower, your mom is my girlfriend.” Tom ran his fingers through his hair as he tried to wake up.

He wasn’t used to questions from the moment he opened his eyes. What he really wanted was to grab Mia back in his arms and spend the morning holding her, laying with her and talking with her.

“Tom’s going to be visiting for a little bit while we get to know eachother better.” Mia offered, pulling her messy brown waves into a low pony tail to be delt with later as she tried to usher the little girl from the bedroom.

“If you’re boyfriend and girlfriend shouldn’t you already know eachother?” Sally was too goddamn smart for her own good. Mia regretted every fairy tail they watched together as well as every little cartoon with a romance subplot.

“Well,” Tom jumped in. “Mia- your mom and I mostly got to know eachother online. When you’re talking through a computer or a phone, it’s not the same as when you’re together. Because I live so far away-”

“In England.” Sally offered helpfully.

“Yes, in England- it’s not easy to come all the way over here to visit. Is it okay that I visit?”

Mia nodded, than announced that she was ready for breakfast. The small girl turned and disappeared down the hall again, leaving the adults to figure out what their day was going to look like.

“I can make breakfast?” Tom offered, standing up and reaching toward the ceiling as he stretched. Mia couldn’t help but notice how his muscles stretched in the process.

“There should be some pancake mix in a cabinet.” Mia looked away, hoping not to have been noticed looking.

“Will do.” Tom had to cross the room toward her to get out the door.

She had expected him to just walk by but instead he stopped in front of her. “What?” She asked as he offered her a soft smile.

“We’ve been married for a day now.” He reached out and caught her hand. The pad of his thumb rubbed along the back of her hand. “You’re allowed to look at me.”

“I wasn’t-” She’d been caught but he cut off her protests.

“I’d like you to look at me. I want to know you’re attracted to me. I don’t want to be appreciating my wife’s beauty and have her too ashamed to appreciate my body.”

She didn’t know what to say to that. There was no safe option. He had called her beautiful and given her permission to gawk at him. There was absolutely no way to turn that down without making herself look like an ass and probably hurting feelings,

“Not to sound arrogant but there are women all over that look at me like a piece of meat. Of all the woman in the world, I want you to look at me that way sometimes- if you want to.”

“I just-” Tom again cut her off.

“I know we’re doing things out of order. I know we don’t know each other much at all. I know you’re largely against trying this but if we are, I want you to know, if you want to look at me, to touch me, you can. You’re my wife.”

~~~~~<3

Mia was left standing alone in the bedroom trying to gather her thoughts, something he could clearly see she needed. Tom knew he was putting a lot on her but it felt like he was pushing against brick walls.

She let him out of her site though, and that was a sign of progress.

“Oh, fuck!” Tom’s shout had Mia flying down the stairs in the blink of an eye.

“What is it?” Sally’s door opened, bells announcing her emergence as Mia yelled. She knew though, why Tom was yelling. At least, she was pretty sure. “Is it a bug?”

“There were cockroaches in your bloody sink.” Tom was leaning against the counter and catching his breath. “They gave me a fright.”

“There’s spray under the sink.” Mia slowed to a walk as she approached Tom in the kitchen.

“Why are you acting like that is normal?” Tom wouldn’t say he was afraid of bugs but the idea of cockroaches in the kitchen he had been planning on cooking in did make him feel uncomfortable.

“Because it is.” Mia shrugged and tried not to bristle at either his volume or his tone. “There’s not much that can be done about it- Most apartments around here have them.”

“How?”

Mia shrugged again. “The dumpsters are across the parking lot. People make messes and don’t clean them up. They get into the walls and they spread.”

“They’re in the walls?”

Mia was too tired for Tom’s dramatics. They’re bugs, that’s all. No worse than any other beetle- they just had a stigma against them. That was something Mia had to learn a long time ago. Unless you’re rich, you lived with roaches.

“It’s pretty much impossible to get rid of them in an apartment. The maintenance guys left dishes in the sink so I’m not really surprised that there were some hanging out. Usually they’re by the front door- if they’re around much, There’s some gaps that make it easy.”

“What’s for breakfast?” Sally asked from the stairs, sweet voice cutting through the tense air.

“What would you think about going out for breakfast?” Tom offered, though to Mia it sounded less like an offer and more like a demand. “My treat.”

~~~~~<3

Mia had been quite through breakfast. They day was quickly getting hot but Tom suggested a playground after eating. It was clear to Mia he wasn’t eager to go back to the apartment. That bothered her, a lot, and she hated it.

The fact that it shouldn’t wasn’t lost on her. She should be thankful to the bugs for their work toward driving away the invader in her life.

Instead she was just feeling judged.

Sally didn’t care. She was running through the playground. Little shoes on her feet left splashed footprints in a trail behind her as she made a circuit between the splash pad, the playground and the swings. Blonde hair, darker with the water, dripped and flailed in as she went.

The adults sat on the bench and watched. Tom soaked up the normalcy of sitting in a park, left alone and unrecognized. “This is nice.”

“It is, in a way.” Mia agreed. “The screaming kids get old after a few days though.”

“I don’t mind.” Tom shifted and Mia could have sworn somehow the air itself around him changed. “There’s something I want to talk to you about.”

If Mia had to pick a phrase to make her feel the need to run away, ‘we need to talk’ and it’s variations would be it. “What?”

“I- Well,” Tom hesitated which didn’t do much to put her at ease. “How do you like your apartment?”

Mia was silent for longer than Tom liked. He offended, he knew it. Just as he was opening his mouth, unsure of what he would say next, she answered.

“I like it well enough.” It was a simple answer. “It’s been home since Sally was born. Believe it or not, it’s a good size for the price. We’re going to be just a few minutes walk to her school, there’s a pool and playground. It’s got everything we need.”

“It has cockroaches.” Tom countered.

Be happy, Mia told herself, this is what you wanted. “So, what?”

“I don’t mean to offend.” And yet he did. He tried a different approach, “I just- How are things?”

“Things are fine.” Mia could feel the walls that had started to slip slam up. “Say what you mean and mean what you say.”

“Are you living in that apartment because you cannot afford something without bugs?”

She opened her mouth to deny the truth but Tom was committed to this line of questioning and spoke over her. It was now or never, he felt.

“Are you making excuses to put off grocery shopping because you can’t afford it? If you’re struggling, I need to-” he rethought his word choice, “I should know.”

“Why?” Watch your voice, she told herself. Watch your volume. It wouldn’t do to have their first marital fight in the park be a screaming match. “So you can help?”

“Yes- is that so bad?” Tom wanted to reach out for her hand. Would she let him? His fingers inched toward hers but they did not touch.

“Yes!” Mia threw her hands up in exasperation. The man had to be dense.

“Why? You’re my wife. She’s my step daughter. Why should I not contribute? Why should I let you-”

“Because you won’t always be here.” Volume Mia, mind your volume. Sally called to them, waving. The distraction was a much needed pause for a few seconds. “We’re strangers. You’re leaving in what, a few days? You’re going to go away and I’ll still be here with the same bills and responsibilities.”

“We haven’t talked about beyond the next few days.”

“Exactly.” Mia sighed. It was something they needed to talk about. It had to be talked about. “What are we doing, Tom? Really? Because this seems like we’re just playing pretend.”

“We’re getting to know eachother, as-”

“We don’t have to be married if you’re so determined to get to know each other. We’re not actu-” She cut herself off, unsure if she even wanted to go there.

Did she want to act married on a deeper level? If not, than what right did she have to be annoyed by the superficial happy family at the playground moment. On the other hand, if she did want to commit to trying something deeper, did she have a right to be upset at him offering help?

“Than lets talk. She-” He waved toward Sally, currently running through the splash pad again, keeping herself free from the day’s quickly building heat. “can play as long as she’d like.”

“I just- I don’t even-” Mia kept restarting as she tried to find the words for what she needed to know.

~~~~~<3~~~~~<3

Tom stood in front of the flower display that made up the lobby of the resort they were currently in. If he was honest, he had lost track of where and when they were hours ago.

The most beautiful woman he had ever seen stood with her back to him as she looked at the display. He couldn’t wait to see her in her wedding dress but there were a few things they still had to do.

This was one of the most important things.

“Mia.” His voice was thick. Was it emotion or the last old fashioned still coating the back of his throat?

She turned to him and the glowing lights seemed to dance over her brown waves, making them look like the butterscotches he had loved as a child.

“What are you-?” Her words were eaten by the busy lobby as he sank to one knee. In her bag was two jewelry boxes. He hadn’t told her about the 3rd.

“Will you marry me?” He asked officially. A woman like her deserved a proper proposal.

~~~~~<3

Tag List: @winterisakiller, @alexakeyloveloki @jennyggggrrr @dangertoozmanykids101, @tilltheendwilliwrite @tinchentitri, @wizardcherryblossom @buttercupcookies-blog @violethaze @kats72

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winterisakiller · 3 months

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Sunflower, Book 1 Chapter 7

Tom Hiddleston x OFC Series rated: M Chapter warnings: Tom sticks his foot in his mouth some? AN: Sorry for the delay, we didn't get home as early as I thought. Chapter 6, Masterlist, Chapter 8

~~~~~~~~~

Dinner time quickly approached, giving Mia and Tom both a break from the awkward small talk. Tom sat on the couch, Sally next to him talking through her favorite movie. A blond haired fairy in green fluttered around the screen while Tom had the origin of the fairy explained to him.

He didn’t need the lesson in Tinker Bell though, no one did. The whole point of the movie itself was to explain that but Tom was a good sport about it. Mia couldn’t help but smile at the sight of her daughter with what, maybe- if she gave into Tom’s delusion for a second- could be a father figure.

“Mom, what’s for dinner?” Sally’s ability to change trains of thought quickly and rather suddenly seemed to catch Tom off guard but Mia was used to it.

“I’ll figure something out.” Mia couldn’t commit to anything.

She had been so focused on surviving the day that she hadn’t thought to pull any meat out to thaw. There were dishes in her sink that were not there when she had left her apartment yet had appeared by some magic before she had returned. The sandwich bread was left open as was the sandwich meat in the refrigerator, leaving both dried out.

It was disheartening. Money was tight and the kitchen was hardly stocked before she had left. In a ideal world, she should have been surprised that the maintenance staff helped themselves to her food but she wasn’t. It wasn’t the first time it had happened and she was far from the only person it happened to.

“Is there anything I can help with?” Tom had excused himself from the lecture on Tink without Mia noticing.

“No.” She choked on the word and closed the fridge.

“What’s wrong?” He kept his voice low.

“Nothing.” She lied but he didn’t buy it.

She was helpless as he opened the fridge to find it nearly empty. The same was said for most of her cabinets and the freezer. “You have no food?”

“I did- not a lot but it’s fine.” She sighed. “But the maintenance guys used it up. Repairing the AC was hard work and I’m sure they don’t get paid well, they probably needed something for lunch.”

“Are you being serious right now?” Tom was clearly incredulous. “They ate your food?”

“I can’t make it not have happened.” Mia shrugged. “I’ve got a box of Kraft and some cans of peas- It’s better than nothing. I’ll go shopping later.”

“When’s later?” Tom wasn’t letting it go and she wanted to scream. “That’s hardly a nutritious dinner.”

He didn’t realize it but he was walking a very dangerous line. Mia had spent everything she had to provide for her daughter. While their meals often missed the mark nutritionally, she did the best she could with what she had.

“Look- if you don’t like it go out to a fancy restaurant or order yourself some take out.” The conversation wasn’t going how Tom wanted it. “I’ll make sure my daughter is fed, don’t worry about that. When I can, I’ll get her better food but she won’t starve. Kraft hasn’t killed a poor kid yet.”

Don’t slam things. Don’t bang things. Don’t snap. Don’t crumble in the face of reality and an empty bank account. Don’t scream. Don’t cry. Don’t. Don’t. Don’t.

Don’t ask for help.

Never ask for help.

~~~~~<3

Tom ate the overly yellow mac and cheese and too mushy canned vegetables without complaint. He had enough sense to back down in the end.

It was surprising, if Mia was honest. She had expected him to order himself some take out or order a Lyft to take him to somewhere with proper food.

Before they knew it, it was time for bath and bed time. Sally had insisted Tom read her the bedtime story. Mia stood in the doorway, an ever present shadow supervising her daughter’s time with the stranger in her home.

While his velvet voice finished ‘One Fish, Two Fish’ and moved onto the next book in the small stack Sally had gathered up, Mia searched everything she could find about Tom’s background. He surely had people to hide controversies and poor behavior for him but she had to look for any sign that he would be unsafe to have in their home overnight. Every search came up that he was perfectly fine, though a little flirty.

Could that be trusted? Could she trust him?

“Alright.” Mia pocketed her phone and put her hand on the switch. “Tom needs to get his beauty rest so he has the energy to play tomorrow. Us adults don’t have unlimited energy like some kids.”

There was a soft pink light that spilled into the hall from Sally’s room. The pink bulb in her desk lamp provided more than enough light to keep childhood monsters away. Usually, the door would be left creaked open but tonight, Mia closed it.

In her hand she had a string of Christmas bells Sally had refused to part with when it came time to put away the Holiday decorations. Careful to make as little noise as possible, Mia tied the string of bells to the doorknob while trying to ignore the feeling of Tom’s eyes on her.

Sally was a easy sleeper and was probably asleep before the door latched shut. She also tended to sleep through the night and sleep in some in the mornings.

Mia had little doubt she would have the bells removed before Sally got up in the morning. If the child did wake in the middle of the night for the bathroom or something, she would be amused by the tinkling of the bells when she opened the door. Mia could make up some story of silly fairies and their antics.

Unlike Sally though, Mia was often a light sleeper. With a stranger in the home, Mia would be even more easy to wake. She hoped she was just being paranoid.

Really, she probably was, she knew that. But she couldn’t help it.

“Bells?” Tom asked.

“So I know if the door opens.”

“Is that necessary, really?”

“If it was, would you honestly tell me?” Mia challenged and Tom had to admit she had a point. Still, the idea of someone being so threatened by his presence as to put a make shift alarm on a child’s door ruffled his feathers.

Thankfully, he didn’t argue as they made their way back downstairs.

~~~~~<3

Mia stood and watched as Tom spread out the fuzzy throw blanket on the small couch. He was dedicated to sleeping on it, just as he had said. It was clear as day that it wouldn’t be comfortable for him. The couch wasn’t six feet long or even close to it. He wouldn’t fit.

Sure, he could sleep on the floor but she couldn’t have him do that. Not down stairs. Not sandwiched between the front door with it’s gaps around the poorly hung frame and and the kitchen.

Tom fluffed the couch cushions and a large stuffed animals.

“Stop.” Mia failed at hiding her annoyance from her voice.

“I figured I’d sleep early?” Tom turned to her as he continued to fluff. “For all the excitement of last night- I’m knackered. I figured, lay down, check the emails I’ve been ignoring…”

“Grab your bag.” This was fucking dumb, she told herself as she grabbed the smaller of his bags and started her way up the stairs. This whole situation was awkward enough as it was. Why not make it just a little worse?

Tom followed her as she marched single mindedly down the hall. She had paused at the stairs to flip off the living room light and again to turn off the light in the stairs. She didn’t stop or look back until she tossed the small carry on bag onto her bed.

“I’m not following?” Tom carefully set his own bag down on the floor.

“You can’t sleep on the couch.” He started to protest but she spoke over him. “You don’t fit. And the floor isn’t an option either.”

“I’m not going to have you sleeping on the couch in your own home.”

“I’m not.” She sighed and fluffed blankets just to busy her hands. “We shared a bed last night, didn’t we?”

“As you’ve reminded me multiple times today, we were very drunk.”

“Look- I agreed to give this thing a chance. I don’t think making you break your back sleeping rough when there’s a bed is giving this a chance.”

“Okay.” He watched her cautiously. “Only if you are sure. I don’t want to rush things before you’re ready.”

“That ship’s already sailed.” Mia mumbled to herself as she walked into the closet portion of the room. “You can put your bags somewhere in here, if you want.” The sentence was finished through a long yawn. Tom was right- between the late night and the hangover exhaustion was quick to set in.

As Mia grabbed a pair of shorts and an over sized shirt from the closet, Tom’s bag unzipped in the room behind her. She came out into the bedroom space to Tom rummaging for a pair of sweatpants.

“I’ll go change in the bathroom.” Tom shut the bedroom door behind him on his way to the hall. Mia started working the buttons of her shirt. “Oh, shit-” Tom’s voice was cut off by the shutting of the second bathroom door.

She couldn’t help but smile for just a moment. It was exhausting being on guard, keeping her walls up even as he did everything right all day long. Every so often though, she would find herself caught by the way the sunlight lit up his eyes or the way his voice sounded when he remembered there were two doors to the bathroom.

There were moments of tenderness he extended toward her that were easy enough to resist- thank you anxiety for that. It could be so easy to just give in and care.

The moments of every so slight judgement helped too.

Was there actually judgement though or was she imagining it? No, they had been there. She needed them to be exactly what they felt like, an attack on her parenting and her ability to provide for her daughter.

What made it hard to resist the fairy tale romance he petitioned for that morning was the moments of tenderness she caught sight of with Sally. He was good with her, that much couldn’t be denied. Sure, it’s easy to be easy with a kid on day one as an unknown stranger. How things would go when Sally got really comfortable with him was the real question.

Would he be around long enough for that to happen though? They said they would give this a fair shot but neither had defined what giving it a try looked like. He had to go back to England in a few days or so, didn’t he?

They would be married legally but what did that really matter? What was that more than a paper? What was that at all?

This was all too confusing. How was she expected to make sense of this fucked up situation?

A knock on the door between the bathroom and the closet area brought her back to reality. Thinking herself into a circle wouldn’t do any good.

“Are you decent?”

“Does it matter?” The exhaustion made it hard to keep her thoughts to herself.

“Why shouldn’t it?” Tom peeked from a cracked door as if that would somehow filter his view, preventing him from seeing anything indecent while letting him evaluate if it was safe to enter the room. “Are you good?”

~~~~~<3~~~~~<3

“If you could have any ring, which would you want?” Ton asked in front of the jewelry counter. Everything glittered and was shiny. There were no price tags to be seen.

“I can’t tell you that!” She giggled, leaning over the counter. Her hair was messy and her lipstick was smudged slightly but to Tom, she was a vision.

“Why not?” Tom wrapped his warm arm around her and looked over her should at the sea of rings.

“You’re supposed to pick for me.” She teased and so he did.

He took his time as she fluttered from display to display looking at trinkets. Every ring looked to be either too much for his bride to be or not enough. She was normal but she was lovely. She was natural but she was beautiful.

“Can I see that one?” Tom pointed to a rose gold band with what looked to be a pile around the top of the band.

It was small and delicate in his fingers as they held it to him. “We have it in her size.” The staff offered without prompting.

There was a larger center diamond, sparkling as a traditional center piece. To each side of the larger diamond was a scattering of five smaller diamonds, each getting smaller than the next and looking very much like snowflakes. The band wasn’t crowded with the number of stones and there were bare points between the diamonds.

“There’s a band that goes with it.” The woman behind the counter supplied, taking the ring from him for a moment. She slipped the tip of her index finger into the rings and lined them up.

The wedding band nestled right against the engagement ring. The band waved against the larger one, reaching down into a delicate point below the large center stone. There were five diamonds on the wedding band. Much like the engagement ring, the diamonds of varying size looked to be scattered like snowfall. The rose gold band was a warm complement to the icy fire of the diamonds.

Would she like it?

~~~~~<3 Tag List: @winterisakiller, @alexakeyloveloki @jennyggggrrr @dangertoozmanykids101, @tilltheendwilliwrite @tinchentitri, @wizardcherryblossom @buttercupcookies-blog @violethaze @kats72

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