Last Seen Blogs
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ireallyamthemaincharacter
i thought we were talking about me?
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I spy with my little eye two babies by the beach!
Starring: Girlwithaturtle & Geniewithabottle
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Liebe ist das größte Geschenk wenn zwei Menschen sich gefunden haben
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Hmm…first photo didn’t get any bites. Hope ya’ll will enjoy this photoset.
If anyone can give a shoutout so I can get more views that’d be much appreciated as well <3
Hope ya’ll like the content I plan on sharing with you!
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These were one of my favourites, wish abu Canada would get them back in stock so I can order a box.
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I’d like to submit into evidence,
Myself. Completely. Unabashedly. Humiliatingly so.
Depose me.
Stripped down to my studs - the core of me.
Me; trying so hard to express a longing, a vulnerability, a need to be acknowledged as small and contrite and incomplete.
Please be advised- this is me. (Today, anyway.)
Not the me you wished I was, or wanted me to be, or believed I was, or thought I’d come around to being…
Not a work-in-progress toward what you imagined. Not someone with potential to be another someone. Not a cook, not a housekeeper, not an accountant, not a punching bag, not a sponge to absorb the worst of you while you muster the best of yourself for people who aren’t as important as me… I’m not a knick-knack on your fucking shelf that you’ll get around to when you’re feeling up to it.
I am complicated. I am emotional. I am demanding. I get teary-eyed over song lyrics. I like to make a big deal of your birthday. I like to go to great-lengths to surprise you with that one thing you really wanted for Christmas. I save the ticket stub from that first movie we ever went to. I get anxious when I feel ignored. I am terrified of railroad tracks & the number 6. I never feel allowed to act honestly - I analyze my reactions to everything before I express them - even though I already feel them just the same.
I want to rebel against “perfection” for the very fucking sake of it, and yet I’m still always holding myself up against some conglomerate of perfectionism that is just that - a mish-mash of other people’s ideas… some cultural, some familial, and some generational. I fucking hate and decry all of it; but in the corners of my mind I’m still trying to measure up to it, BEFORE saying “fuck that”.
I want to never need a single fucking one of you.
Ever.
To need is to be beholden, and the past 24 years has taught me that the piper always requires payment. And he will snatch it away while lording your neediness over you. Just to twist the knife.
Tonight I walked home, alone, and I noticed the sounds of people laughing and talking and,
the sounds of forks falling on the floor,
and glasses full of ice thrown back,
and dishes being bussed into bins,
and I looked down at my feet walking by themself, and I felt
This happy melancholy.
Loneliness, mingled with the peace of solitude; and I can’t help but admit it’s a place of serenity, but it’s as sad as the person who believes there’s nothing more than this.
My heart and mind don’t know how to conceive of love in a way that isn’t charging chivalrously on the back of a horse, towards a happily-ever-after.
And yet, I don’t need you.
Or anyone.
I don’t need saving.
I won’t be what you want.
I really really fucking tried.
Just so that I could have permission to be cherished.
To feel that I’d earned it.
To be able to say YOU MUST CHERISH ME BECAUSE I TICKED ALL OF THE ENDLESS BOXES.
To earn the right, because you moved the goal-posts, and I STILL showed up in the end-zone. You HAVE to love me - right? I did everything. I was diligent. It’s only fair.
It’s the lesson I’ll spend the rest of my life trying to learn. That I can’t be everything, and “no matter what” isn’t healthy. And I get to decide that I’ve done enough. And your next set of hoops to jump through are BULLSHIT, and I’m not gonna spend another 24 years testing the theory.
I won’t spend another minute doing that with ANYONE.
And it fucking breaks my little-girl heart. It isn’t romantic. It’s realistic, and NOT glittery, and it makes me sad.
But it makes me safe, from ever feeling that maddening inability to ever earn back the love I can give away so effortlessly….
I’ll keep giving - because I like to, and it feels honest.
But learning to stop expecting is the thing that’s made me grow all the way up,
and it’s the thing that has broken me all the way down.
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I was hoping she’d go into the croc store & she did 😍 I got so many angles on her, she didn’t mind the attention & neither did her bbw friend
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Caught this fat ass as she went into the toy aisle, I got up close & personal. Husband didn’t even notice what I was up to 😋 keep a better eye on ya lady if she has a bbl cause I will enjoy it 😂
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I just bought her this pair - two sizes smaller than she normally wears. What do you think?
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Amazing hot tight big ass Lululemon yoga pants pants teen
Full video available $$
Face included. DM for access ✅
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More unposted Teacher Classics in those blue pants That ass is so fat, and those pants don’t hide the cheeks one bit
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