22.
night, art, photography
lyrics, quotes, nature
fashion, models, food
sailor moon, anime, & other stuff.
20000 posts
Don't wanna be here? Send us removal request.
Last Seen Blogs
enerlitesblog
Enerlites
serpenumbra-blog
vox nihili
nikitoimagito
Untitled
sobachenko
SOBACHENKO
sissiaimee1988
proud virgin sissiaimee
Text
I think about you sometimes. You were like my platonic soul mate. I've never said those words out loud but I felt them all these years. But being with you I felt safe. It wasn't, but it did. Sometimes I miss you. Sometimes I want to message you. What would we say after all these years. Have I forgiven you? Were we supposed to stay friends?
We would laugh at all the stupidest shit when we were teens. I get scared to say anything to you because there came a point when I couldn't trust you. Even now I wouldn't want you in the same room as the person I'm seeing. But I do miss you. I want to see if you're okay. But I don't know if I want you in my life. But I think we are still the same. I think maybe, if we saw each other again, we would just cry. Maybe we miss each other.
Because for a long time, you were my best friend. I've never been able to laugh with anyone how I used to laugh with you. Is it because I got older? More cynical? Why do I feel like you're the only one I can turn to when we haven't talked in 10 years.
Am I tired? Am I looking for you to help fix me? Am I being toxic? Do you need a friend? Do you miss me?
Were you who I thought you were? People pull the blindfold over my eyes time and time again, did I ever really see /you/? You always saw me though, I never felt like I had to hide from you. We would fight and make up months later. Everyone said you were a bad friend to me. Was I a bad friend to you? It's funny, I miss you more than anyone I dated. That's how good I felt our connection was, most of the time. I miss staying up so late and laughing at stupid shit, I still think of fishymoo and skitalios and our disgusting midnight food creation. Just typing that made me laugh and make my heart feel crushed simultaneously.
I think about the times you stopped talking to me for other people though, and stopped wanting to hang out with me. Never wanted to go do things together. Were you embarrassed of me? Those times still haunt me now. I'm scared of people leaving me for someone better so I don't bother making connections now. Even though it was my decision, losing you hurt. I thought losing you would help heal me. You left me so many times, I had to put a stop to it. I couldn't keep hurting. I'm trying to convince myself talking to you would be a bad idea.
How can I feel this way about our friendship and still feel like you didn't care in the end. It was so hard for me to let go.
But even now, when I feel so alone, I remember how you could feel like home. Nobody ever really gets me, but you did...I like to think at least.
I don't know. I am frozen. Once again I can't make a decision. Sometimes I wish you would reach out again. I'm too scared to make another choice I might regret... so again. I stand here waiting for life to happen to me,
Being passive and letting it make my choices for me.
But you are enough to make me have these thoughts and need to type them out. Tell someone, something, or even nobody at all but myself.
I know you won't see this ever, but I hope you'll be okay.
7 notes
·
View notes
Photo
ZUHAIR MURAD at Couture Spring 2022
if you want to support this blog consider donating to: ko-fi.com/fashionrunways
294 notes
·
View notes
Photo
street fighter swimsuit special 2022/ frankie’s comics SDCC exclusive variant cover
317 notes
·
View notes
Photo
Mammatus clouds moving in ahead of severe monsoon storms, J-Six Ranch, Cochise County, Arizona.
2K notes
·
View notes
Text
I feel like a zombie, I try to not think about it and think about it all at once. I felt too much again. And I knew it wouldn't work but I deep deep down kept holding out that small bit of hope.
And stupidly even now I still do and I don't know why. I don't even know what I want.
0 notes
