There’s a not zero chance I’m moving to Florida by the end of the year…

I’m gonna throw up.

I’m gonna throw up.

Okay so maybe he does like me

honey, you know that boy you text is in love with you, right?

Well I mean I’ve known him for a month so no he’s not but also I don’t have the mental capacity to properly think about that so also no he’s not.

REBLOG THIS TO GIVE THE PERSON YOU REBLOGGED THIS FROM A GOLD STAR BECAUSE THEY’VE BEEN STELLAR TODAY AND THEY DESERVE IT ⭐️

Mitch and I went to a game tonight, and the plan was he was gonna sleep on the couch and I was gonna sleep in his room because we were going to get drunk, and he’s got to be at work at 5 am.

We just got back and his roommate has a friend over and they’re playing cards in the living room and are going to be up for awhile, so I’m in his bed and he’s asleep on the floor three feet away from me and my heart is beating so fast I’m shocked he can’t hear it this wasn’t part of the plan!!!

Mitch doesn’t believe that I’m watching the football game (regrettably I am) so tomorrow when we go see the blazers game I’m gonna just watch f1 on my phone 😒

Love someone who listens to my instagram stories 😂😭

Mitch and I were hanging out after work and this mother fucker put on drive to survive to keep me occupied while he took a fucking nap 😭😭😭

What are the odds this is gonna be something nice?

(The odds are zero)

honey, you know that boy you text is in love with you, right?

Well I mean I’ve known him for a month so no he’s not but also I don’t have the mental capacity to properly think about that so also no he’s not.

I made Mitch pick an F1 team and he chose Merc (disappointing but ok fine sure whatever McLaren was RIGHT THERE) and now he constantly is sending me stickers of Toto Wolff 🙄

I identify with Arabella in the best possible way, because instead of running to the cool barbarian who cut through Avernus, or the heroic Blade of Frontiers who would absolutely show her how to wield a sword, or the flamboyant vampire who would literally let her get away with murder, or the funny magic man who would conjure her a handful of candy from thin air, or the mysterious half-elf who loves animals, or the literal alien who looks like a banana ... she runs to the rotting corpse who speaks in Shakespearean metaphors. Iconic. Love her for that.

Mitch made a sticker out of a half asleep selfie I sent him weeks ago and he won’t stop using it AND SENT IT TO OUR BOSS

Granted, our boss has been my best friend for nearly 6 years but the point remains

When Mitch abandons me (doesn’t reply in a timely manner) I resort to drastic measurements (making plans to entice him)

the spam pictures are bc I told him to wake me up from my nap at 5:30 💀

ok.

Okay now he won’t stop

I shouldn’t be surprised this mf is always watching something history related but sheesh

I shouldn’t be surprised this mf is always watching something history related but sheesh