sam reich should be running Squid Games

Saul Goodman - Two years ago I renewed my license

It has apparently been ten years since the time one of my professors pulled me aside to tell me I had to clean up after making out before going to class because my lipstick was everywhere and I realized "actually my tapdancing group decided we all had to dress like the Joker for our performance" was an infinitely worse explanation so I just said I was sorry

💜🏴‍☠️✨ HAPPY FRIDAY, ZADDIES [x] ✨🏴‍☠️💜

nothing will make you think "i have got to get weirder" more than finally feeling comfortable enough around other people to admit to interests of yours that you think make you a freak and a weirdo only to realize with a combination of embarrassment and relief that you're like a normie to them

beauty standards are so fucked up what happened to i love your body because it's you. what then.

whatever

my biggest red flag is that im a lesbian who likes boobs and whenever im watching a show with obvious fanservice and all the girls have their massive tits hanging out of their bras being held together by string, my first reaction isnt to go "god im so tired of all this oversexualization of women". i go WOOOOO BOOBIES !!!!!!!!!

i can’t believe i fell for it

I was playing the Sims 4 with Gordon Ramsay and we were arguing about where to put the fridge.

i have 3 moods:

skips every song on my ipod

lets the music play without interruption

plays the same song on repeat for days

happy first contact day! Thought I would re-cap Solkar’s thought process during this momentous historical moment since vulcans kiss with their hands. 

i will never be over the fact that during first contact a human offered their hand to a vulcan and the vulcan was just like “wow humans are fucking wild” and took it

does anyone have that unsettling oil painting of a dark window with a sheet leading out into the darkness? it did the rounds on tumblr a while ago and i need itttt