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turtonstipsakathelovedoctor · 2 years

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Turton's Tips- 5 Tricks To Woo Over The Ladies

Hey everyone! It's The Love Doctor here, coming at you with some banger tips for the fellas in how to trick the ladies into falling in love with you knuckleheads. I have been going through a bit of a dry spell recently myself. No one has tooted this horn in a while if you know what I mean. So, I've been trying 5 new things to really get those ladies engines revving.

TIGER PRINT. I heard that ladies are really into men who are in touch with their wild animal. They like a man who can take their panties off with their teeth and growl at them while having sex. I think that tiger print is the perfect way to project that new found confidence. Cheetah is too MILF for me and also screams I finish quick. The tiger is a stalker who waits in the bushes for his prey. And that's what I want the ladies to think of me.

SAUVAGE DIOR. I followed the Amanda Herd v. Johnny Depp trial very closely. They did my mans wrong. I have been a big fan since he was in charlie and the chocolate factory and i was devastated to see his name dug through the mud like that. but in the end he won. And in the end, that's what I'm trying to do, catch a big win. So, I'm spraying in my Johnny Depp smell and going out looking for a win.

COLE CAUFIELD JERSEY. I am a big hockey fan as many of you may not know. And Cole Caufield is one of the best scorers to have ever put on hockey laces. I'm trying to emulate the success that he has on the ice to my bedroom sheets. So I'm throwing on the old 22 jersey and trying to score with some ladies top cheddar if you know what i mean.

I'M GOING FOR ALL 7'S. As you guys must already know, I'm a 10 guy. I swing for the fences and I usually hit pretty good. But whenever I'm going through a dry spell like I am now, I always lower my standards and bang a couple 7's. I've said this for years... Any 7 can be turned into a 10 with 4 beers and a can do attitude. It's simple math here. So I'm exclusively hitting on 7's to secure a hunny for the night.

TWO DIFFERENT SHOES. If you're like me sometimes the ice breaker is the hardest part that's not my dong. So I'm wearing two different shoes. It's easy, the ladies will be like "why are you wearing different shoes, Love Doctor?". And I simply tell them "I'll tell you when you sleep with me". Game. Set. Match.

So these are my 5 tricks to getting with the ladies. Hope this helps you boys and I'll catch you on the flip. Kachow

The Love Doctor.

P.S. If you have any questions don't be afraid to shoot a text my way and The Love Doctor will be sure to find a remedy for your heartaches and pains.

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