Hi. I'm a trans man who sent you several messages back in 2019, and you were wonderful in how you answered them. I just wanted to let you know that today is the tenth anniversary of my top surgery. In April this year I came out to my parents, which I always thought was impossible (I thought they would disown me: they have not). I finally got my new birth certificate, with the correct gender and names on it (and no others!), last week, and came out to another person I didn't think I would be able to tell. I have now transitioned as much as I wish to. I've made it. I'm 38, and it has taken 23+ years and a lot of misery and endurance to get here, but I have finally arrived. I have defined my own masculinity and am achieving it. I just wanted to share that with you, and to thank you for being who you are and running this blog. Peace and happiness to you. <3

Anon, thank you so much for sharing. I'm absolutely so proud of you, and so glad that you were finally able to come out to your parents and that it went better than you thought that it would. I'm so glad that you're living the life you want to live, and it means a lot to me that you wanted to share that with me.

Honestly, I've been feeling a lot of despair lately, because my own transition keeps getting pushed back and pushed back, and its done me a lot of good to be reminded that I'll still get where I wanna be, and there are guys like you out there being themselves to the fullest. Thank you so much for sharing, and I'm glad I could help you out all those years ago.

i just saw a trans dude like My Age say some shit like "im a trans man and im bisexual so theoretically i could date women but then i would be subjecting them to having to date a man and i dong want anyone to suffer that much" and ive seen so many similar videos on my fyp from trans boys so if ur a trans boy reading this i love u its okay to be a man. ur not a monster ur great transitioning wont make you abusive or anything i promise its okay to be a man

Transition Tuesday

An overview of all the things you will need to update after legally changing your name. Unfortunately, updating things with one entity does not always automatically update it with others. Ensuring all necessary items have been updated with your new name can save a lot of headache in the future.

whats cool about being trans is my parents are totally right. i did kill their beautiful son. im the thing that animates his corpse in an ever more convincing parody of a happy girl. i devoured him from the inside out and now there is nothing left of him and he is dead dead dead and there is only me, with my hollow eyes and dark eyeliner and long hair, and my big smile. my limp, effeminate gestures belie the marionetting of the boy they loved. my fagginess is his death. already his body becomes a fitter home for my parasitism in full; the tits, the hips, the thighs. sorry about your kid. thanks for the biomass <3

transmasculinity and trans manhood are things to wear with pride. they will never be anything to be embarrassed or ashamed of, or something to be avoided. wear them loud and proud, you are radiant

I'm coming to love my graft.

It looks freaky. That's okay, I'm a freak.

It looks scary. That's okay, I'm scary (so I’m told).

It looks like it hurt. It did, and it was great.

It represents a long hard road out of hell. It's a sign of my dedication to authenticity. I'm proud of it.

Transphobes do their best to scare trans men away from life-saving medical care like phalloplasty with gruesome photos of fresh surgical sites. They want you to believe that it'll always look like that. But your flesh will heal, and so will your soul.

Here's the truth about transphobes: if gender affirmation surgeries were pristine, blood-free, scar-free, magical transformations, they would STILL try to scare you out of getting them.

Getting pins in a broken leg is gruesome, too. But isn't it worth it once the leg heals?

I love my scars. They're stories told in skin. Here's where I broke up a dog fight. This one's from a gun. Here's one from an Offspring concert. Here are the ones I got in exchange for a life without dysphoria. My scars celebrate my life and remind me of lessons I've learned.

So, too, with my graft. Every day I can look at it and remember that I made it. That I am made whole. That I am free.

I don't hide it when I go out in public. I am not ashamed. Let everyone who sees me know that I am a self-made man.

I often grieve the childhood I didn't get to have because I was a nonconforming kid (now a nonconforming adult), but it helps to remind myself that so many queer kids live their teen years out in their 20s and 30s.

I didn't miss out on anything, I just haven't gotten there yet. This is something so beautiful about queer lifestyles, that time warps around identity.

Since Tungle will not let me post, we'll try a link instead

sometimes, it’s casually looking in the mirror and suddenly realizing my chest is flat and my shoulders are broad. and it feels so natural i don’t even notice it anymore. but when i do, my heart bursts and i feel like the happiest person on earth.

being trans isn’t just dysphoria.

it’s this.

and it will be for you too.

We will always be here 🏳️‍⚧️✨

seeing other trans people be happy and enjoy being trans is not a threat to you. to doubt their transness because they're (perceived as to be) not as miserable as you is, however, a threat to them. - transmonstera

[IMAGE ID: "to measure the validity of other transsexuals by their misery is to hold the cissexual narrative higher than your own right to joy" in bold white text. the background is a number of yellow measuring tapes and rulers. the base of the measuring tapes has a sad face sticker on the side. the background is solid black. END]

Hey anon what part of I am not discussing this further did you not read? If a different word exists, I'd use it. But, as it is, there is not, so I will not be discussing this further.

“afab chests aren’t inherently sexu—” please say breasts please just say breasts please please please stop throwing the term “afab” around say tatas say titties say big bahoona bazingoroos if you must

*accidentally used the wrong pronouns for em, sorry about that, just went to check its bio again

I added the correction to the original ask, thanks!

I don't really want to get into this topic discourse wise- I'm actually trying to avoid heated discourse now that I learned I have some pretty nasty morality OCD, so I'm gonna ask we not debate the situation. I think it's really nuanced, and I'm not the person to make the case either way.

In the future I'd like to ask anons who are letting me know someone has a habit of bigotry or something similar let me know examples of that and not just go "so and so is x" and nothing else. If they're like, a self described t*rf or smthing in bio thats different, but Id prefer going forward if we handle that with proof of accusations, for my sake.

I don't actually think the core of transandrophiba is transmisogynist. I did for a long while actually, but I realized I hadn't actually like. Listened to what the people talking about it were saying, so I took a step back to look myself. While it's not a perfect concept, I think it's important we have the language to talk about the different types of intersections of oppression, and what the people talking about those struggles are saying.

I'm not trying to start discourse, but I think it's important to like. Listen to one another on this one.

Not the same anon, but people usually call genderkoolaid transmisogynistic because they talk about transandrophobia and apparently that makes them an enemy against trans women or whatever. I see this take all the time. To my knowledge there's no other reason

That's what I was assuming, honestly, but I'll let anon or anyone else give their case before dismissing out of hand just to be sure.

Not the same anon, but people usually call genderkoolaid transmisogynistic because they talk about transandrophobia and apparently that makes them an enemy against trans women or whatever. I see this take all the time. To my knowledge there's no other reason

*accidentally used the wrong pronouns for em, sorry about that, just went to check its bio again

That's what I was assuming, honestly, but I'll let anon or anyone else give their case before dismissing out of hand just to be sure.