tommyswiseau - Tumblr blog

tommyswiseau · 2 months

Text

Pearl (2022)

#pearl

1K notes · View notes

tommyswiseau · 2 months

Text

you have to stay alive. you're going to be such a beautiful middle aged freak. young freaks will see you in the street and know that things can be okay.

118K notes · View notes

tommyswiseau · 2 months

Text

there's something very uniquely evil in the fact that the food aid dropped to gazans by the US wasn't halal

47K notes · View notes

tommyswiseau · 2 months

Text

what people who say "don't say 30 year olds are old, 30 is still young!!!" don't understand is i know that. i'm not calling my 25yo coworker old because i believe it. i'm calling him old because i enjoy psychological warfare

19K notes · View notes

tommyswiseau · 3 months

Text

this is a normal high school movie now only fig didnt get the memo

3K notes · View notes

tommyswiseau · 3 months

Text

fags are allowed to say dyke and dykes are allowed to say fag in the same way that youre allowed to run up and slap your sibling on the back of the head

113K notes · View notes

tommyswiseau · 3 months

Text

My deepest darkest fantasy is that I collapse on the street and I am rushed to the hospital. They perform a bunch of tests and find out I am severely deficient in some kind of vitamin. Then I start taking the vitamin and I become the happiest cleverest person alive because all my problems were caused by this one deficiency

149K notes · View notes

tommyswiseau · 4 months

Text

If your child is born a clown, you've got to let them clown. You can't un-clown a child by prohibiting them from doing clown shit. You've just raised a clown that doesn't do anything.

28K notes · View notes

tommyswiseau · 4 months

Text

"unalive" should just mean the opposite of undead. if undead means a dead thing thats alive, unalive shuld mean an alive things thats dead. no i dont have any examples. ☝️yet

77K notes · View notes

tommyswiseau · 4 months

Text