tiredkitten - Tumblr blog

tiredkitten · 10 hours

Text

₊˚⊹｡ i'll be good to you | nanami kento

wc: 1.5k

summary: nanami’s half-hoping you call a fourth time.

contains: implied f!reader but no mention of pronouns, exes, mentions of alcohol, swears, reader wears makeup and heels, drunk calls, a bit angsty and a bit hurt/no comfort but it isn’t all that sad i think

a/n: this ran away from me again! but this is a brainchild from me and @augustinewrites, with song inspos: you were good to me, tequila, bourbon, and already gone

part of the in's and out's new year/birthday event | request prompt: calling your ex drunk at two a.m. with feelings still stuck in your throat

you are here -> part 2

Nanami moves in numbers.

It comes with his personality—practical and efficient, forward thinking.

Predicting deals from 9-to-5 looks a lot different from dealing deaths by a ratio of 7:3, but the tactics remain the same, the stakes still high; every move is precise and calculated, analyzed to be accurate.

So he’d known—the day he decided to pick up his blade again was the day he’d deal his final blow—at you, and the relationship you built together.

A strategic takedown of something he deemed doomed from the start.

That’s what he wants you to think, at least.

When his phone rings three times—the first in the middle of lecturing Yuuji, the second while going overtime underground, and the third just moments ago, bleeding out on a bathroom counter, Nanami realizes that the probability of him ever speaking to you again, alive and breathing, is a number he can’t predict.

So he waits, linen pants and a cotton shirt while sporting a drink by his kitchen counter.

Strangely, he’s full of hope, half-good and half-bad—that you’ll call back; that you won’t. The line between the two blurs.

It always has with you.

A friendly face—that’s all you were supposed to be; his work neighbor a few cubicles down his. It started with polite nods, a few casual waves, maybe even small smiles on a good day. Your schedule was terrible, much like his—one of the first ones to arrive and the last ones to leave.

Then, you finally moved past just a friendly hello; something about bread, he recalls, an attempt to exchange recipes on sourdough. It started then, with you leaving a cup of coffee on his desk and he saving an ‘extra’ sub for you.

(Except, it’s never an ‘extra’ with Nanami; he’d never do anything miscalculated.)

Suddenly, you’re the first face he looks for in the morning, and he’s the last person you check on before clocking out at night.

For a while, he didn’t know what to call you—a coworker? Friend? Someone he has dinner with at 12 midnight?

You set it straight after the seventh ‘date’.

Now, when his phone rings the fourth time, he picks up.

You’re cursing on the line, the sound of metal clinking on tile muffled in the background.

He waits for you to talk, half-hopeful and half-nervous at hearing you speak.

You always used to drop your keys by his door—your haphazard way of looking for his amongst five of yours.

“Shit,” you grumble, the lock finally clicking open.

He hears your footsteps, the sound of your heels landing as if they’ve been hastily kicked off.

A party, perhaps? Or a night out?

There’s a funny feeling that sits in his stomach when he thinks about you coming home from a date, one he knows he no longer has a right to.

It should be good, he thinks, you’re moving on.

He stares at his glass, liquor blurring into ice—brown edges fading into something lighter, near transparent. For a moment, he wonders if this was a mistake, if you hadn’t meant to call him at all. He’s considering putting the phone down to save you the embarrassment.

But—

“Finally,” you spit out, clumsy and a little too honest.

To anyone else, you’d sound normal, but Nanami’s known you for years, has loved you for just as much, and this sounds a lot like the version of you that’s lost track of how many you’ve had to drink—the same one he’s had to tuck in bed, with your arms clinging onto his neck while dragging him under the covers with you.

He takes a sip.

“Was starting t’think you died or sum’in.”

It’s impossible for you to know the truth, he’s made sure of that—it’s why he let you go in the first place.

“Someone offered to buy me a drink t’night,” you mumble, wood scraping against your floorboards. The exhaustion in your voice is palpable.

He has no idea why you’re telling him this.

“I asked f’r bourbon,” you breathe, shaky, “on the rocks, because—”

That’s what he always got, what he introduced to you when you asked him why he likes it so much. 2 ounces of bourbon for a ball of ice, with time as an aid, mellowing its intensity to flavors of smoky caramel, vanilla, and a touch of spice.

He gives a lowly hum, swirling the drink in front of him.

“Was it good?”

(The drink, the date. The potential new guy.)

There’s silence on the other end of the line, too long to be considered thoughtless. His watch counts the seconds.

“Not as,” you finally answer.

Another bout of silence.

He wonders what you look like, if you’re wearing that lipstick you know is his favorite; if you still smell like the closest thing he’s ever had to a home. Do you still keep an extra handkerchief in your purse? That obnoxious cow print he now uses to remind him of the life he used to know?

You sniffle.

“You fucked me up, Kento.”

He knows.

“How c’n you say this… is what’s best f’me when it hurts this much?” you hiccup, a sob caught in your throat.

When Nanami ended things with you, he gave himself 30 minutes. Any less, he would have regretted it, and any more, he would have taken it all back.

“Y’re so unfair,” you breathe out shakier than the last, broken more than anything, “din’t ev’n ask me what I wanted.”

He knows.

And he supposes he deserves this, aching at the way you fall apart on the line.

He takes another sip, longer and fuller, dragging out his gulp.

“I still love you,” you weep, voice unsteady, “and I f’cking hate you for that, y’know?”

Your words burn more than the alcohol down his throat.

His eyes start to sting, brown glossing over. There was a time when your ‘I love you’s’ gave him reason to wake up in the morning; when they got him through the day and lulled him to sleep at night.

But this one, this time, he knows, will haunt him for the rest of his life.

(He’s never wanted anything more than to say it back to you, right now.)

“I apologize.” the words come out stiff, squeezed out as he puts down his glass.

“I know,” you scoff, managing a chuckle while sniffling, “like that’ll do ‘nythin though.”

Nanami clenches his jaw, fingers tightening around his drink. You always were the perfect bite to his snark, acknowledging things straight up, as is.

And you always had a hunch of how things would end up.

You know that this call is pointless, that he won’t take you back by the end of it. You also know that each and every one of his decisions comes from a series of calculated predictions, that once he makes up his mind, there’s no changing it. You know how Nanami works, that he moves in numbers.

Except, you never know his reasons—that the truth of all this is that he’s sworn to himself that he’ll be good to you. There’s no point being with an empty man, and dragging you into the dangers of sorcery would be cruel, even more unfair to you.

The line is quiet for a while, filled only with your attempts at steadying your breathing.

“Did you drink enough water?” he asks, a little out of nowhere but completely in place.

You snort, pushing back your chair, “Shouldn’t say things like that,” your footsteps are picked up by the mic, “makes it sound like y’care.”

He hears you gulp a glass down on the line, lips curling into a sad smile.

“D’me a favor?” you slur, followed by a yawn.

He hums.

“Stay on ‘til I fall’sleep?”

And for once, he doesn’t think so hard about it. This small thing can’t possibly skew the damage he’s already caused you.

“Okay.”

A creak sounds from your end, the sofa you both used to spend your weekends on; it’s been thoroughly broken in, love seeping through each crevice and dip. It’s selfish, but he hopes you still feel him through it—giving you a safe place to rest, soft and tender in keeping you close when he can’t.

You shuffle, pillows muffling the microphone as you move around; then you mumble, sleep-laden, “Don’t forget to turn the lights off.”

It shouldn’t affect him this much, but the reminder calls back every instance you’ve ever said it to him: whispers over his shoulder, while dragging your feet away from his home office; a peck to the tip of his ear before nuzzling his neck while he reads; a shout from your bed, for him to hear within the echoes of the bathroom walls.

You both have terrible sleep from odd hours at the office, but nightmares have always persisted with him more. Turning off the lights was a reassurance, a quiet ‘I love you’—a reminder that it was okay to fall asleep, you’d be there when he wakes.

His eyes zero in on the light switch to his right, humming his response.

The call runs for 31 minutes.

a/n: other tidbits i wasn't able to include—reader is able to hold liquor well, and used to drink with nanami often but doesn't understand the appeal of his preferred drinks; reader is able to go head-to-head with nanami's personality but is also a lot more vibrant and loud; reader also doesn't know about the jujutsu world (in case it wasn't obvious). i also envision nanami becoming less himself towards the end of their relationship, which is also when he starts considering going back to sorcery.

thank you notes: big thank you to @augustinewrites for half-mothering this fic 🥺 what would i do without your sad ideas and songs to match!! and to @mysugu and @soumies for ofc!! listening to me talk abt this all the time lol

comments, tags, and reblogs are greatly appreciated ♡

463 notes · View notes