thethingsweneversaid
Crazy Together, Right?
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Argyle Judges the Diggers
Round 1: the digging tools
Will: It's not even a shovel, it's a hoe. This is a poor choice for burying a body. 2/5.
Mike: It's at least a shovel. It's very flat though and won't be able to hold much sand. 3/5.
Jonathan: It's the biggest, most effective shovel I've ever seen. 5/5.
Round 2: how much sand are you really moving?
Will: Again, it's not even a shovel. He is literally pushing sand with a hoe and he's not pushing much. Again, 2/5.
Mike: Very decent, he fits a lot of sand on that pancake shovel. 4/5.
Jonathan: Peak efficiency, full shovel. 5/5.
Round 3: can you bury a body tomorrow too? Posture check
Will: Not great. Back is very hunched but at least his knees are bent. Still, he will be sore tomorrow. 2.5/5.
Mike: Horrible posture. Makes my back hurt just looking at him. No one taught him to lift with his knees, that much is obvious. He will be popping pain killers tonight. 1/5.
Jonathan: Exquisite. Back is straight, knees are bent, he is leaning into the motion. Could bury a body every day of the week without a problem. 5/5.
Final results:
Will: 6.5
Mike: 8
Jonathan: 15
Jonathan is crowned winner. Dig that body, king. 🤴
Bonus: watch Will move like 4 grains of sand
Added bonus: Jonathan pushes the 3rd place loser aside to get his trophy from Argyle
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I refuse to believe this was unintentional
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THE BEAUTY OF STRANGER THINGS (2016-2022)
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constantly thinking about flickergate
still images below the cut because the gifs turned out extra crispy on tumblr
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“Will’s bowl cut is ugly”
WHAT DO YOU MEAN???
IT SUITS HIM SO WELL SHUT UP 😤
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wouldn't it be nice if they could just relax on the hill after the apocalypse is over :)
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always vaguely feeling like im in trouble for something but idk what
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You can dislike Noah if that’s how you feel (i feel that too).
But if you’re wishing he’d be gone instead of wishing he’d learn and grow, you’re not any better than him.
I saw someone here, a byler writer I really love, say ”I need that vile man gone for good.” And I’ve seen many even worse things.
And I know most of you would actually prefer for him to educate himself and learn and grow and be better.
But you still say horrible stuff like that. And I get it. You’re scared, hurt, angry, sad, tired, frustrated… many different negative feelings.
But he is too. He’s been for a long time. Living under a lot of stress for a long time changes people.
Do I think he deserves your sympathy? That’s up to you.
Do I think you should stop openly wishing for his death? Yes. And pls take a long look in the mirror too.
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Mike's love to Will making him the strongest he's ever been mentally, Jim and Joyce and their love to El as parents making her the strongest she's ever been with her powers because she has the family she always wanted + the love of all the others in the show towards them all and the bond that Will and El have... Vecna messed with the wrong people 🤭
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okay say queerbaiting or milkvan endgame all you want but i have yet to see any plausible heterosexual explanation for the following
- the airport hug
he was happy to hug will in season 3 and happy to hug lucas in season 4. when the entirety of the show has made it clear that mike and will share the more profound bond (destiel iykyk) out of the party it makes no sense for him to not want to hug him- unless it’s because of his queer realisations atm
- ‘we’re friends, WE’RE FRIENDS’
um it is simply not plausible that mike clocked wills feelings enough to say this yet didn’t pick up what he was putting down in the van speech. bffr mike was absolutely on the defensive here, mans was trying to convince himself
- mike looking at eddie
you’re telling me you watched the scene in episode one where eddie has his ‘if you’re inTo baNd’ speech and still think mike isn’t a homo? he has a lil fanboy crush on eddie and none shall convince me otherwise
- mikes reaction to el kissing him and i love you too
there is no heterosexual reason for him to look so taken aback and distressed after her kiss and her saying she loves him too. the music and els face all suggest a beautiful moment of love but mikes face looks shocked completely contrasting this. esp contrasted against his face at ‘what if you wanna join another party’ and considering his face when he hugs karen at the end of s3. up till then he had made no effort to try and rekindle their relationship but still wanted to see her and talk to her while she was away. ur gonna look at me and ur gonna tell me that i’m wrong
- ‘i care for you so much’
yes i understand that some people have trouble saying i love you- as we see with nancy and steve. bUt the way this is framed in this scene makes it feel queer. he is deflecting he says he cares for her but can’t say he loves her. this is why i’m a gay mike truther this feels like he’s trying so hard to be someone he’s not but he’s reached his limit. he can’t truly say he loves her until under so much duress and pressure. even when he first said ily in season 3 was just a slip up and significance was only given to the words through everyone else’s reactions, not mikes own reaction.
- ‘mrs byers has this new job, mikes always complaining about it’
im sure i butchered this quote but we KNOW him and el only talked on walkies because she couldn’t talk on the phone for dead of the government figuring out she was alive. this line proves mike called plenty and he can only have been calling to talk to will. while yes it is feasible that he was calling as friends, why wouldn’t he say something? leaving this revelation until the last season makes it significant, and therefore makes it romantic and queer.
- shared looks
do i even need to explain. their looks are just fucking gay. especially that one in season 3 where wills like he’s here and mike just keeps staring at him for a good while
- the emphasis on lucas and mikes friendship
they make clear in season 1 that lucas is mikes best friend by mikes convo with dustin. and in season three their status as best friends is made clear because they relate and complain to each other all the time. then WHY throughout the WHOLE show is mike and wills bond given the most focus??? season 1 will is mikes motivation, season 2 he is his priority, season 3 they have an important arc and season 4 they have ups and downs but ultimately their relationship is regarded as most important- they are the only two from the original party who have consistently been paired together. dustin and lucas were both in the hawkins crew but were always in separate groups. there is no heterosexual reason to make clear who mikes best friend js then spend 4 seasons focused on his relationship with will.
- framing
there is no heterosexual reason to frame him in a closet at the milkvan season 3 kiss. there is no heterosexual reason to put a one way sign pointing to his closet. there is no heterosexual reason to pair him and will in the closing shot alongside two other endgame couples. need i say more.
- blue and yellow
obviously this colour symbolism is undeniable at this point. whether or not ppl believe it symbolises their relationship or just their characters, it’s clear that will is yellow and mike is blue. there’s a reason we barely see green clothing or lighting. there’s a reason mikes bouquet to el had purple (her colour) but too much yellow (will). there’s a reason their flannels always have hints of the other persons colour.
- will as mikes priority
instead of coming crawling back to el for forgiveness in s3 he goes to will. he says his life started when he found el (a lie like the rest of that speech) yet when will went missing he only cared about him. all of season 2 showed that he loves will so much he wouldn’t leave his side ever.
i have many other opinions about why milkvan endgame would completely undermine so many messages of the show but yeah i’ll stop for now
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(giving speech at podium) comrades. friends. bylers. we have endured hard times. but we are close. we must not give up hope now. we must remember that will byers DOES NOT belong to noah schnapp. he belongs to US. BYLER WILL REIGN! GAY PEOPLE WILL REIGN!! also, FREE PALESTINE!
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"Will has been painting a lot, but he wouldn't show me what he's working on, maybe it is for a girl, I think there's someone he likes because he has been acting... weird"
*jealousy intensifies*
*IT WAS FOR ME?? HE LOVES ME BACK*
"oh..." *sad gay boy*
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